April 14, 2025 • 60 mins
After a couple of weeks of not seeing each other, the lads wanted to do an episode together with no guest and some mad stories come out!
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
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(03:00):
Let's get into the episode. I'm at state Liverpool then.
Yeah, may as well might as well know.
We go together. Go together are you a big jump
All right, we're good to go I. Was waiting for you to start
(03:23):
Nick and then. Boom, we're back.
Hey, public episode. Just the boys today because I've
been on holiday. Danny's been on holiday.
Tony was ill for a bit. I had food poisoning.
And I thought we've not been in a room together.
I mean, we've been in a room together.
Well, it's not out yet. Do what?
(03:43):
I mean, the patron, Well, it's we recorded one last week,
didn't we? No, no, I've been.
I haven't been together for weeks.
What must mean you've been The live show together on me, Danny
was an holiday. I've been, I've been, I've been
in the street together. For ages because.
Say, so I made an executive position to say, let's have a
little public episode where it'sjust the boys.
(04:03):
So I think I adore in public. We had a lot of nice comments on
the Jacob episode. Thank you very much.
Oh, we had a bad comment, though.
It's funny though. Don't do it again because I was
like, it's funny. What?
Is it? You know I hate I hate reading
comments so right. Well, because we mentioned fail
on the pod with Jacob talking about that charging winger
(04:29):
Tories who's a patron of ours. He told Fiona, you get a shout
out here where we just talk about that Georgian player.
So fiance commented in the in the comments and and he got he
got what's like a strike or something.
What do you got on YouTube if you comment stuff like a
warning, basically, And when yougot a fucking warning for that
(04:52):
because he called us uncultured swines and stuff, just jokingly,
right. And And when you got a fucking
warning for that after the thousands of comments where
we're getting fat cunts, ugly ginger, meth, this never
happened, right? Do you know what I mean?
We got low. We got tons of bad comments.
(05:14):
Yeah. And we never see one getting
flagged up. I feel like I know.
Yeah. Although it did make me laugh.
There's a comment on that Jacob episode, right?
Wouldn't just look at me now. This guy said what I look like
and he said I look like, all right, let me just, I don't want
(05:36):
to influence your decision. Just look at me.
Yeah, I think you look like a beautiful boy.
He said I look like a plate of food from Benidorm.
Oh my God, that's the funniest thing I've ever heard playing
(06:00):
featuring Benny Dolan. These comments are ruthless.
I think what what made the worstwas you have beige shorts on so
it looked like you'd had no short shorts on at all to be
skin coloured and your hoodie was beige as well so it was
just. And there was quite a high up,
weren't there? Yeah, someone said.
Why does Jamie insist on wearingclothes that make him look like
(06:22):
he's naked? Something like that.
Kind of. Can you crop a picture of what I
look like and the comment pleaseand?
A place of Benadu. Benadu.
I just put a peel. Jamie, it's.
Not the difference. That is funny.
That one. That's hilarious.
That was a great. Some of them are class, are
they? But I yeah, I don't read them.
Yeah, yeah. So if you, if you, if you
(06:44):
listen, if you create a few insults, that's fine.
But that was funny that that tickled me that I, I think, to
be honest, when I got told that I forgot what I was wearing, I
thought you said it about me face, because I'm Ginger and
Blotcher. I mean it, it might have been
that as well. I'm just saying I think.
Wow, that's what I need. Between on top of it.
(07:06):
I think Oh no, it's class though.
Very funny. Yeah, so I had, I had lots of
people sending me pictures of donkeys.
Lots of people. So what did you just do?
What did you just do? You.
Want to do me? It was.
(07:27):
It was obviously you. I had nothing to do.
Messages on Instagram was just full of them and Twitter was
full of them. So I know you just said
something while I was off sick fighting for me life.
I had loads of people say I was off sick because sent aside to
leave as. Well, that's why I didn't say
that. Yeah, I know that's serious as
well. I went yeah.
Because The thing is it's like it's it's, it's obviously a
(07:50):
massive Liverpool fan, but it's also really, really close so.
It's actually a family friend aswell.
With the Alexander Arnold, I don't know, he wants to poop
him, but he's like, I want to get his dream or something.
That's. Awful lot I.
Think he's all right, Kim? Yeah.
I went to Blackpool, did the sound users on the podcast.
(08:12):
Callum told us that you have been to Blackpool.
Right, so went to Blackpool. Oh, that's where.
Yeah, and I think I've obviouslygot food poisoning from there.
Because you got that one pound burger.
Yeah, it was closed, was it? Yes.
So then we went to like this with the big please.
It was £6.50. I think I got food poisoning
from there. I think I would have been
alright with the 1 LB burger that yeah, I just felt as soon
as I had to have felt weird. The weird and the.
(08:33):
Next day I woke up and I just couldn't keep anything out or
did was waiting because I was waking up like 6 more messages
while they said I'm just being sick again.
Weird cheap burgers, man. Yeah, Blackpool was sick, by the
way. I didn't realise how boss it is.
No. It's, it's so good.
Yeah, yeah, yeah. We, I was like a little kid just
going around. Just fucking just do it.
Just playing the football. You're like the footy thing.
(08:54):
You've got to get enough in the in the little.
Oh yeah, yeah, yeah, just class lad.
Just a big kid. Just properly live your
childhood, don't you? Yeah.
Smoking. I would say he's like cans, cans
of fucking and kind of stuff. It's good to leave your
childhood, isn't it? Yeah.
You'd agree with that. That's good.
Why is that? You.
That's good. That's good.
(09:14):
I'm glad you agree. I've had a good week.
You've had a good week. Last week I've had a bad week,
like money wise and shit national weekend and stuff, but
I've had a good week, like right, I get into stuff, I get
into things. Yeah, not many like might be
(09:35):
away from the norm, like people just see me.
Yeah, he's fucking. His first fork is cool.
No one says what? No one's ever said that.
But they say you're funny and you're a nice guy.
Yeah, you're a nice guy. You're funny.
(10:00):
But I have like I lead into somethings that some lads will like
call, you know? Gay.
Gay, you're a lot cool. Whatever.
Yeah, yeah. So like that, that isn't gay.
No, I didn't say that. I'm just saying like that's what
other people might think is gay.No, it's not.
What's that? What's gay about darts?
(10:22):
Right. I don't know, I really like
that. Yeah, that's amazing.
Don't come to it. Don't even start with darts
because you don't know what we're about to tell you.
So many, many years ago, right? Right.
Listen, no, I'm just going to behonest now.
Yeah, right. I've been watching this kid play
(10:45):
Pokémon Red. Yeah, the first version, because
I never completed Pokémon Red. I used I used to get stuck after
the 3rd gym for for really, You know, whatever it's called
Lieutenant Sarge, whatever it's called the Thunder guy used to
beat him and didn't know how to get forever right.
She always got killed in DouglasCave and that.
(11:07):
So I've been watching him play it yeah, I've been so into it
because he's doing 100% work forlike get all the missing items
and that stuff like you need like moon stones and shit.
Yeah, so I've just been watchinghim for hours lad, and I've been
falling asleep to it to watch onYouTube and just put on the side
and it's got all the all the theJapanese music for the game by.
(11:35):
All that stuff. Yeah.
And I fall asleep. You know the Pokémon music,
don't you? Yeah, yeah, yeah.
And I fall asleep to it. I've been dreaming about
Pokémon. So I've been watching.
Wake up, watch Pokémon all day, then go to sleep by thinking of
it, dreaming about it. So I've Youtubed how to get an
(12:01):
emulator on my phone. So I've got a Game Boy, an
emulator and I've started Pokémon Red and I've been
playing Pokémon Red and me character's called Moz.
Oh that's the worst. And the rival's called Dad.
I don't know what's more sad, right?
(12:22):
The fact you've watched a kid play it.
How long did you watch him play it for?
Did you complete it? I've not completed it yet.
It's I've done, I've done like 21 episodes of about 45 minutes
long each once an hour and a half.
That was a special one because he has to go to Pokémon.
So I'm 14 hours of Pokémon Red. He has to go to Pokémon Yellow
to get certain items for the 100% work from Pokémon Red and
(12:44):
he trades them through. So I've watched a good.
Yeah, good. 14. 12, yeah. 15 hours, yeah.
And then I was just like, I can't stop thinking about it.
So I was looking at the other side.
Google you all these. I don't know if you get them in
your algorithm. I get them every second video,
Joe. Like if you're 30, you need this
Retro advanced. Yeah, it's got 10,000 games.
(13:06):
Yeah, yeah. They look sick though.
They look sick, but. I know there's a con.
I don't know why I. Just don't know why, but I know
you're going to have to downloadsomething else and I don't know
how to do things like that. So I just I YouTube.
How to get an emulator on your phone?
So I've I've, I, I didn't think it would work.
I thought, let me just try it. Downloaded this app called Delta
(13:29):
and Google Pokémon red Omega download generation one, but you
got to do it on Chrome, not safari.
And it just fucking worked. I thought this has actually
worked. So I've just honestly, like I
got here at 1. Lauren dropped me off because
she just got her nails done. So oh, you dropped me off at the
station and said, Oh yeah, you'll be a bit early though if
(13:49):
you record it. So I went, Oh no, that's fine,
but what about it? I'll just and I got in at one
year, got off the train. I was like, oh, an hour to kill
because normally I might last minute hour because of how
awkward the trains are. NUMA Vanity Cup Reds Coast train
as well. Got off the train.
(14:13):
Yeah, and I've just have a little bite to eat.
So it's just a bit small. I'm going to sit in Lime St.
Central because you're going to start a few phone and stuff
inside. Less interaction just playing
Pokémon. Yeah, playing Pokémon with a
fish finger boy, who's one of the best hours I've had in
weeks, man. Just a fish finger Butty.
(14:33):
Fish finger boy Pokémon red Pokémon Red.
You know my problem with it is. I tell you what, I didn't know I
was a kid. How bloody good Needle King was.
Who's the Oh? Boy get get a nitter on, yeah?
What's that? Get a little nitter on, like a
little rabbit thing with an arm.So you get a nitter on, Yeah.
(14:57):
Train out to Nitterino, and thenwhen you go through the moon
cave, when you go through the old Mount Moon, when you go
through, when you go through Mount Moon, you get a moonstone.
Yeah. And then you can level up
Nitterino to Needle King becauseyou need a moonstone to do it
and I never knew that as a kid. And Needle King is a fucking bad
(15:18):
man mate. You thought Charizard was a bad
man? Needle King is a bad man.
Have you got it now? I've got needle king, I've got
ASP team at the minute I've got I've got needle king, a cadabra,
Abra, cadabra. No, not abra Cadabra, just
cadabra. I had that bro.
Then he falls to Cadabra. Cadabra Needle King Rattata.
(15:45):
What did you pick for your Your your?
Did you just pick your first Pokémon?
Charmander, did you? I've got so Needle King Rattata.
Charmander Needle, King Cadabra.Rattata, Chameleon, Pikachu.
(16:12):
You've got Pikachu as well. Yeah, Veridian Forest level 5,
level 15. What's 361?
I've got loads in like in, built, stored in.
Built. Have you got any water type
Pokémon? That's well, I've I've got a
fellow training in Magic Carp, Joe, Magic Carp Little.
(16:35):
All it does is all it does is splash.
That's his already move, so you think he's a Diva, but if you go
to the Pokémon daycare centre, this guy goes a look after your
Pokémon for the fee you give himyour Pokémon.
And every step you take, the police, every step you take, it
(16:58):
gets one XP so you can train it while you're just mooching
about. And then it turns into a Juridos
and Juridos is on fucking but inyou know.
And how long does it take that? I've only just.
It's only just been looking. Have you done all this in an
hour? No, not in an hour.
I've been playing it all week. Oh, you downloaded this this
(17:19):
week? Yeah, yeah, I've just been
playing on the cell phone, ignoring me bad and that.
Are you going to do any of this or you just you're just going to
like go out of this after this for a little?
While I don't know, you know, we'll say because I've never,
ever gone past the third badge. What's happened to the darts
career? Oh, I've been playing.
I've been doing well, you know. Yeah, the total average was
(17:40):
going to the 40s for the first time.
I did 19 dart like they were there.
My mate always beats me like we've played like 30 games, it's
like 25. Five to it, but beaten 4 nil
back-to-back. They were there, yeah.
I missed 66 for a 132 finish, missed the bullseye for a 112 5.
(18:08):
So what like that 123? You were hitting the bullseye in
general. You know, if you have to hit it,
do. You know, our mate, I had, I had
135. Yeah, 135 is bullseye.
Treble 15, double 20, boom, first start, bullseye.
I'm I usually get like the 25 oryou know, the thin part of the
(18:32):
number. So I've got boom bulls like your
proper in the middle as well. What that is a bull's eye mate.
That's a bull's pupil, Bull's eye bang.
Red dots on your head. Red dot on your head.
Hey, red dot on your tip. We all belong outside.
(18:57):
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(19:20):
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Oh. So I got bang bullseye bullseye.
(20:06):
No, we're doing left-handed bullseye trouble. 15 double top
for 135 and glue double top normally fucking just under 115,
but your. Favorite double?
Do you know what? Probably 6.
I mean it was always double 16. I was able to get double 16 but
(20:28):
I've got so good at double top at the minute because that's 66.
That's my mates as well, that side of the board.
I prefer the other side. I think it's because they have
wonky. I like 16 and 8 but tops I was
always bad at but during my general gameplay because I'm
releasing the darts so like bad.I'm getting loads of double
(20:50):
twatters in my gameplay. Yeah, Oh yeah, just going for
triple 20. I'm going for treble, but don't
call it triple. It's treble.
So it's like I. Hate the word triple?
That goes for you. Nah.
Just you like a triple Decker. What a triple Decker sandwich.
(21:11):
If it's meant to be triple, yeah.
It's like if you watch the Olympics, you don't call it the
treble jump, would you? Why is it?
What's the difference between several and?
Double I don't know, but they'rethe rules bro.
Those there for a reason. I like go so late.
It's I got a lot of double twatters.
(21:33):
So I'll get 100 and rather than 62 twatters often I'll get 2
double 20s and a 20. So I'll just know like bang
double twat what? About you done What have you
been up to Turkey? Haven't you been?
Yeah, man. Yeah, it was decent to be fit.
What did you get done? Nothing.
They'd buy a shit loads of fake clothes though, so if you see me
(21:53):
in anything except for trainees and that's got a logo on it,
it's probably from Turkey. Was it cheap?
Was it like this? Lad, this was a fiver and I was
like. Yeah, I can tell.
But I was like, even if I went to like Primark, it's cheaper
than Primark, so we don't get it.
I'm not asked that it's fake. It's just cheap clothes that I'm
falling apart. The thing is, what is a fake
(22:14):
clothes though is that? What?
It's fake? That's.
What I mean I'm not. Asked.
Yeah, yeah, I decided. Fucking Lacoste.
One of like fucking crocodile ordamned or something.
Oh, the fact that was that big, Yeah.
It's not weird, though. You haven't got fake stuff on it
and you didn't know. It was like bang on.
And then someone pointed out that was horrible.
(22:36):
It's not fake. Who got it from Elaine?
Yeah, it's Elaine. Fell off a wagon.
He was sick. Mate.
She used to sell fucking Burger King burgers.
One I was unreal. 6 months that six months of Burger King
burgers bro. We are the guy that don't
chicken legends, you know, like the chicken burgers out to them,
like Rob them. They were that was good.
(22:58):
Just chicken legends all the time.
What did you do and say he done?Not much we're in all.
We were in like at all inclusive, like resort sort of
things. We were in and the hotel wasn't,
not the hotel. The weather was a bit shift for
the past couple of the first couple of days but it was nice
because like when we went shopping and stuff it wasn't
like beer and a half and bollocks off.
Where is it, Marmaris? No, no Antalya sort around
(23:20):
there. That's where everyone gets the
seeds done. I think I think they go Lara
Beach. Antalya dog do.
That's where they're surveillance.
What a dental thing. Oh, I was.
Thinking of spills and strain onshaky.
Teeth. Yeah, so.
What did you get done? You get your cock bigger.
Nah, I wish I did though. I mean, like I told you, yeah,
(23:41):
you got a pin. What?
Yeah, I've got loads of emails. Odd.
How do you get How do you get your cock bigger?
They cut the answer I told you about this, Then they cut, they
cut, they open it, and then you've got more Dick inside your
body. Like, you know, the way your
tongue goes down to your Dick's similar.
So the, the cut, you know, like the bottom of your Dick sort of
thing that's holding. Yeah, they cut that.
(24:01):
And what about your fat pouch? Dick out?
Have you got a fat pouch? This spear.
Yeah, like the fat pouch. Like Kangaroos for some fat
pouch. Yeah, but when you lose weight,
your Dick looks bigger because of it, because you'd have like
that, this and then that this bebut yeah, but then you do that
and then you pull your Dick out.I don't know how they then sort
of fill the void with skin. But yeah, you can make your Dick
bigger. That's the first thing.
If I got though, that's might the first thing that'd be.
(24:23):
How much have I cost? I guess it's a few grand.
Why? Why?
Because I'm pissing on me balls.Mine's like a little baby's
cock, lad. I don't see the baby's cock
like. But.
I did find something out about myself whilst we were away.
Oh, are you gay? I am sick of volleyball.
(24:48):
Volleyball. Volleyball lad.
You are like a Labrador though Ican imagine you are like the
volleyball. Swear to God I was.
Yeah. It's on it.
Yeah, it. Doesn't don't really do that
fucking it's slapping. Oh, it's there that.
I don't remember to hear. Who was you playing volleyball
with? Just like random, it was like,
you know, like the hotel have like entertainment and stuff.
(25:09):
You went in a volleyball tournament.
It's a kids You went. You refereed an under fourteens
volleyball tournament. It was just like, you know, the
way the hotel. Made friends over there.
Not lad it was. Do you make friends with couples
on holiday? No not not really, but we
definitely couldn't yet. I made friends with some old
German fella because everyone was German there like every
(25:33):
there was. No, come on Danny, with the
stereotypes. No, they literally were.
Tea towers on the sun lounges, was it?
So it, it was mad like it was like as if that Hitler won the
war, like there was one other English couple in the whole
hotel. It was mad because like no one
obviously that spoke English even like the staff, no.
(25:54):
One. Yeah, it's got, yeah.
It's probably there. Spain though, isn't it?
Yeah, it must be because everyone it was mad.
And you got speaking to a Germanfella, yeah?
Sort of, yeah. He kept talking to me in German,
but I couldn't understand the word he.
Was saying you do look German though.
You look like you've got proper German fucking pedo.
There was a few people who thought I was Dutch.
(26:14):
I was like, Nah, Nah, Nah. I'm from England, yeah.
You're cool to be Dutch. You're.
Not an English Large Scouse, you.
Know it's a wall. You paid 120 for this one. 10s
wall. That's nice, so nice, relaxing
(26:35):
the holiday playing on the volleyball.
Yeah. Did you have an authentic German
authentic Turkish kebab? Why was that?
I think so. I mean, the hotel had kebabs.
Like no from a Turkish boss man mate.
Yeah. Oh, no, no, we did go out.
We went out for food to watch the match.
This fella called Rambo, I don'tknow if I put pictures up on
Instagram, was the sickest man of all.
(26:56):
Like we said, we were from Liverpool and he was like, I
love Liverpool, I love Lola. So then I was like, so then he
was like, you come here and I'llsort you out.
Like I'll like you didn't say box you off, but he basically
said take his face and box you off.
And then like we turned up, he'dset up like a table with all
like rose petals on and stuff like in front of the telly.
So the telly was there and he was just on top of us the whole
night. Just pizza.
(27:18):
Rambo was the fucking boy. What?
Was that picture? And he was like, do I find his
back? Sure.
All of them. Probably.
Oh, there's one where you look like proper, like over
stimulating. Yeah.
Oh. Yeah, it's when I'm like.
Yeah, yeah. But I said, well, how happy is
he's like a Labrador. That's why I.
Put it up because it's fucking like.
That he. Was doing all the fun.
(27:39):
Are you getting sensory overload?
Yeah. Yeah, you'll like an epileptic
and laser. Question SO.
It's not just for talking about me behind back.
It was like, look how happy we said.
Look, how happy is this away from us?
Yeah, I actually wish I was thathappy.
That's. What I said, I wish I was not.
(28:01):
Happy. Then we had six hours of calling
it, call it ourselves, bums. We've had a bum week.
Last it started, yeah, we've gota bad week.
It's the worst. It's the worst week I've ever.
Had it's been bad lad. Like on Friday, the live show
you'll see if you see the live, go and check out the live show
(28:22):
guys. All you have to do is tune
patreon.com/hotwater screening podcast 3 LB above.
Sign up all our live shows everyFriday.
They're on there and you get to see last week's live show, which
is one of the funniest. Live shows funniest.
I've ever been. Because we'd fully given up,
we'd fully give it up and most like, fuck it, let's go for it.
(28:43):
And it was funny Lot. Yeah, we were skinned.
Obviously we've not been paid. I tried to get an advance on
your wages and that got turned out.
So we was. So we just, we kept on like
getting the audience spies too. We're like that.
(29:08):
We started off as a joke and then we just went, oh what do
you do mate? I can't go to the bar.
Saying go to the bar all night. Well, it was so.
Funny. Wonderful.
I don't want to say to you much because obviously.
Let's go watch it, but. It's it's honestly on a funny if
you if you can just tell at me and just look down at you before
(29:29):
we're on stage and went, you know what, let's just enjoy this
because we've got an awful left and we, me and Jamie enjoyed it
and a crowd seeing that me and him enjoying it.
So it was just like, like it was.
The atmosphere was funny, lad, Yeah.
That's what makes it If you two were in, if you two were up 40,
the show was. We were like up 40 though.
We were that sad. We we give it up, but we were
(29:51):
like, let's just go out on our shield.
Right. I mean skin, yeah, skint because
at the start of the month, the way it works, yeah, is I have
this corridor of uncertainty. Like the brine has just put a
ball in the corridor of uncertainty.
Yeah it's my direct debits come out on the 1st for me rent and
that always the first so I always make sure I've got that
(30:17):
in got that age can't kick me out that's all I aim for you
it's. Not getting.
Kicked out, we get paid usually like the 5th. 6th, 5th to 6th.
5th to 6th, yeah, National we kind of thought right, I've got
a little bit say, you know, it might be late this week because
the craze have gone to the races, all right, Probably
(30:40):
fucking heavy arm in some bookies out taxing bookies.
All right mate, you're in our patch.
All right, I've heard Billy Kimber's men.
I want a picture of Aintree justbeen taken over by the Blaze.
We will meet them there in our own terms.
(31:04):
Philly Kimberly Yeah, so HR I couldn't pick my fucking hoop I
had last year. Ain'tra I fucking smashed it.
So Chalm and HR last year with great farmer.
Chalm was good this year, don't get me wrong, but that was a
(31:25):
long time ago, bro. That was 3 weeks ago.
A lot moved since then. So done with bollocks, which is
sound, you know, 'cause we're getting paid to and it just
like, oh, it's been, it's been delayed and stuff.
It won't be till Tuesday or Wednesday this week, which is
when we're recording now. Still not been paid.
I'll keep you posted. So we're fucking skin blood.
(31:49):
I mean skin. I don't.
Want to tell the story? Yeah.
Go. So you went the races on
Saturday? Right.
I often tell you because Jamie knows.
Yeah, I thought just tell Jamie won't tell anyone else in the
world. You look, you guys are lucky.
This is the most saddest thing ever.
I said, how can I even want to tell you this?
(32:10):
So funny. I got invited to the race on
Saturday by the Green Room Experience, which is funny
because we're the green room. They're the green room.
And by the way, I'm not even just saying it because it was a
free ticket. I think my invite was in the
post Cheers guys. Didn't invite you?
No, just me because I'm a local celeb and the green room
(32:32):
experience invited me because Paul Smith couldn't go.
And I'm basically honestly, I'm not just saying it because I
went there and like all the I was source all day for course
meal that fancy and all that. It was fucking unbelievable
experience. Like I've been I've been going
since I was 1617, always went ona first day.
(32:54):
The fact like the Liverpool day,the Family Day, which is most
quiet, I believe, about fucking disease involved now and then as
getting old and more like you gowith the lads, you go ladies.
They obviously, you know what I mean.
So I've never done a national anthestati and I'm from
Liverpool, you know what I mean?So it's on our doorstep.
It's you have to take that off. Obviously these people come up
from all around the world that goes to it.
So I when I got advice of thought, I've got to go, as
(33:17):
Jamie just explained, it's been asking.
It's like it's, it's a man's exactly the same.
Everything comes out on just before and so does you get you
go, you go through that 3-4 daysof having football.
Yeah, nothing I'll get some vices and see experience of
thoughts. I've got to go.
I can't not go. So goes goes with the running
running Cray either a bit of a stinker.
(33:40):
I didn't want to ask him as well.
Don't ask anyone to let you lendmoney or whatever, but I'd say
like 50-60 quid on me to their bets yeah, so for that's not
that's not for one or like if wego, but it's still sound.
You know what I mean still, and if it was paid for so don't
really need anything anyway. So for fucking thoughts, So the
(34:01):
guest there, the clean room experience fantastic looked
after unbelievable. AP McCoy was there doing like a
little talk before the compare. There was funny, proper funny
fella Just he done his like background on there's all like
local local celebs there or Zen lists and stuff like that.
You know what I mean? And it's.
(34:22):
Just the irony of it, but go on through.
Yeah, no. I don't see that.
It's just that's what makes it sound like.
Sorry, I know who I am and everyone on our table was there.
Like on our table it was like 810 different people all sound
fucking got on with them all Welsh like got got the
instagrams after it. You know what I mean?
All that and everything sounds all nice people.
Did you recruit any guests? Maybe, possibly possibly you.
(34:47):
Should have been misusing me bro.
Possibly, but basically I'm justexplaining all that because it's
ends a little bit because straight away I'm fucking on the
ale bladder. I had a brand new suit on both
the parts had new shoes on. You know when you get new shoes
like the shift liquors and and and they're a bit too small, you
(35:11):
get caught up. Yeah and my toes were like this
all day. So cosmic toe.
My toes are sore in them and walk like on my tip toes a
little bit. You know what I mean?
Like an arse in the paddock. Then after like a few hours my
calf starting because I'm walking fully and then after
that my back starts in because we and I'm thinking I'm ready
(35:32):
for the scrap yard here mate, they need to put a bullet in my
head and a man of fucking horses.
Yeah I'm finished right fucking shake keeps coming out of me
pants and fucking I'm just flustered them hard.
I'm sweaty. First race comes, I thought it's
got £50 here so goes to go be better and better.
AB says no you need some proof of address and all that to put
(35:53):
more money in this shit. Message Jamie.
Hello Jamie any tips? Said Oh yeah I want to do this
one Me said laddie I sent sent you £20, sent him £20 so put
that on for me to win first raceit was like 13 to two or
something so I put £20. I'm only got 150 back mate.
It was winning all the way it all the way and got pipped right
(36:18):
at the end. By a Mongol.
By a stupid Mongols, yeah. So say to me I'm like if that
were the one that you you paid for your bets all day that's all
I want is you don't have 20 gridon each race.
It's all answered. 6H is 120. Probably had £50.
Yeah. So next minute fucking Apple
(36:38):
comes out. Apple don't even know why I pay
for an Apple 599. You know Apple TV 599.
Oh, you bastard. So now I've got 24 par left.
Yeah, I thought, shit, what we're going to do here?
I just got a bet on a favorite on the next race just to get me
(36:59):
money over there, you know what I mean?
So back to favorite, put £20 on it, gets £7060 back 70, go back
with that and back in then, you know what I mean?
So best TVL Jamie, who we got for this one?
I don't know. Yeah, fucking whatever I said,
lad. I didn't like the race.
You didn't like the race. I said that what I said.
So I explained what I was going to do.
He said, yeah, it's what that. Well, that's the only thing you
(37:21):
can do. Like you just skip Bob just
sounds so Asian. Was sent in another 20 so
already had four with left to bebank.
Imperial St. Imperial St. was yeah, yeah.
Sent them £20 come nowhere. Sansbury won it, right.
Won it last year from the front,similar to how it did this year.
(37:41):
But this year it's just run likea pig, lad.
Because I like I like course previous course forms massively
important for intra. It's a bit of a specialist
track. Do you know what I mean?
It's a pretty unique track. So all that go well there tends
to go well the year after and the year after and stuff buyers
(38:02):
fault. This is I can't see this lad
because it's been running so bad.
So we've got so it's it's flopped.
Yeah, I'm down to 4 LB. Yeah.
But listen, don't need much money.
I've got you know me. Drinks are sorted, can get on
whatever, you know what I mean? It's it's not about that.
You may put just obviously betting and so well, so
(38:29):
basically, honestly, I'm not even saying it.
The gaffe where there was a screen experience was fucking
like unbelievable. Every time I'd finished my drink
and put it down like the waiterscome over and go, we had and
you'd have a fresh one straight away.
I was having Guinness. Yeah.
And I must have put 12 to bed. Yeah.
So I'm glad that I I can't see right.
(38:50):
And as you know, I normally, youknow.
Partaking. You know, get on stuff on the
coffee because it's public trying to be a little bit better
anyway, I get on it. Yeah, I didn't, obviously,
because you know, in the nationsand stuff it's from the dogs and
all that. Could be ass fucking getting
(39:10):
nicked in there. So I just I didn't swear with
it. So I've had no stuff.
So I'm just bloody. I can't see right.
I'm fucked right and also upset because I've lost my money and
sitting there thinking fuck sake.
So message me dad, you know, sayif you send me some money, the
signals obviously in aunties fucked innit.
So just trying to connect on WhatsApp and that I'm falling
(39:32):
bladdered. That goes with ciggies chatting
shit to someone me dad, my dad hasn't seen his message comes
back to the table and and the Grand National's about to go off
by 10 minutes for the race. So we had a fourth fucking.
There's no point now can't be arsed, you know what I mean?
And then but I'm like every our table was all like speaking to
(39:55):
each other and that it was getting all honestly
unbelievable people, but most people have met for a while and
I feel bad that's because. Everyone was saying, oh wow,
what else you've got on this one?
So what have you on this one? So I was, the book was open on
you like you get like a a bulletobviously with all the race in
it. And a book was there and I just
(40:17):
looked at this horse and I just went, yeah, I've got this on.
Yeah. What was it called?
Nick Crockett. So I said glad.
Oh, 15 minutes for the race. I went.
I've got Nick Rockets on. Yeah.
And this, this fella opposite me, older fella, it's like, oh,
really told you fancy that? I said yeah, yeah, I've been all
week. And yeah, in my head I'm just
(40:38):
picked a random horse because I didn't want to say I've got no
money. I can't bet or you know what I
mean? I'm just being honest.
I should have been honest. So instead of that, This is why
I've done a stand up thing aboutit.
I just lie to people just because don't let them down, you
know? Like that's why I feel I'm just
like, I just went, oh, I've got this awesome.
And he got up this I went yeah, go on.
(41:01):
I fancied that as well. But like I was thinking, yeah,
yes. And then just didn't think any.
I'm still thinking bladdered andthen watching the National and
lads, I just in my head, in the back of my head, I'm thinking
what if this comes in now? Yeah.
And I've got no money on it and.You've got to celebrate.
And I've got to celebrate lads, right?
(41:23):
It's fucking two fences to go. It's just, it's just winning and
always. And I'm thinking what am I going
to do? I'm getting out of this.
Everyone's going so easy. I'm going yay Rice Ladie wins.
Yeah, everybody has everyone added on because I said it.
Everyone's one bounce, one of them with £1500.
(41:46):
I went. Sorry, fucking boss, you like to
pick And I was like yeah, yeah. And he went how much?
I said I only hadn't sent it to me, to me account.
So I have just put that on. Yeah, it's still fucking £350 on
it. I went, yeah, yeah, I had. 4.
Pound in the bank, I was fuckingcunt.
(42:07):
Oh, this week I don't. Why didn't I lie?
Don't I just say it? Why didn't?
Because because I've been racista lot of times, you just say I'm
sitting this one out because it was the national.
You don't sit the national out. Everyone else, all women have 50
each way, or at least you know what I mean.
I had nothing. But yeah, I've just had to admit
(42:29):
that said because it's way of telling the story.
At least you've got something out of it anyway.
Fucking laugh out of it. Listen and that teaches you a
lesson. Just be honest with people.
And say, well, I'm a Bullock. I'm couldn't bet on it.
No, but I hope that teach you a lesson going forward where you
keep saying, yeah, I'm just on Islington.
(42:50):
There in a minute. Oh yeah, be so far too.
Honest to God, if you just can do that fucking that clean room
experience, it's fucking unbelievable.
I think they do like Cheltenham as well and other places, but
it's just because obviously if you've got if you've got a bit
of extra money and you want to do it properly and all that
you're doing is if you use just do it because you know you get
(43:11):
your ale sauce all day yeah, thepeople there just just dead
welcoming you get like you get all all your stuff, all your
betting stuff. You get tips off like a a a
legend jockey or trainer you come into talks to compares
fantastic. That's funny.
Don't all like his research on everyone and was just ripping
everyone. You know what I mean?
And yeah, it was just a fucking bell today.
(43:32):
So shouts out the green room experience.
And who knows, maybe next year we could go as the green.
Room. That's the green room that's
working a collab, baby. I know I got invited last year,
but I couldn't make it last year.
Yeah, I think I had a gig or something, but I'll draw it.
Might. I might keep it free next year
and we'll do it next year together.
(43:53):
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, definitely.
You need to strap a couple of Gopros on your two faces and
just watch. It oh, we got 140 that you. 240
faces do. We'd have to do a vlog.
That would be good. Vlog would be sick.
Yeah, just getting pissed and losing it.
How much have you got on this one, Tony?
Oh, it's £20. Oh lads.
(44:13):
I wouldn't say you often do me bollocks on camera.
On camera. I can't believe you've never
done anything like that before. What?
Anything to do with betting on camera?
You know what I mean? It's.
A bitch. I don't want to encourage people
there. We all belong outside.
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(44:33):
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(44:59):
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It's a battle. Yeah, I don't want I don't want
it to like so I've been asked, Igot asked Cheltenham to like
(45:41):
I've been asked a few times fromyour tipsters on Twitter, like
I'll plug me service, I'll give you some dough.
All right. Now, I don't work with tipsters,
man. And someone tried.
I never get asked for anything. Sound drop me, drop me.
I never get asked to do anything.
Just fucking normal me. I wear like clothes on it, but I
(46:04):
don't I don't get paid for it. I just like get get free teacher
that to sound it. So I want to sell out.
So just give me something to sell.
What? Do you want to sell out?
Doing shout out for Duchene on here.
Lord Duchene. Yeah, I was safe because it was
(46:28):
just a boss table. I just, I hate just the only
thing I hate about the races, I didn't have to because it's in,
in one of the in one of the likeone of the main stands as well.
Yeah, I've been, I've been the, I've been races before, wherever
now I fight for the cards like I've here.
Yeah. But.
Oh, so it's not that bad. Then I was a bit embarrassed,
like, oh. No, I've done it last year at
(46:49):
child. The money last year.
At child you wouldn't lie though.
Would you like me? No, last year I would.
I feel, I feel like. I've got it online.
Me. You get better, that's what.
I'm saying. All day.
Yeah, put £50 on it lad, that's.What I'm saying all day.
Yeah, I did it. Well, I did it last year.
(47:11):
Childhood did I where not only I've run out of money, I
couldn't get cash out. I didn't mean limit online and I
hit cash limit. I didn't realize I had like 4
ton cash limit or something on me bank.
Oh yeah, yeah. So I could only get £80 out, but
(47:32):
£40 each, right? Last £80 it one at 3031.
That was I yesterday. Yeah.
Moved skin, right? Yeah, yeah.
Wait, listen, I've been skinned loads times on how to live skin.
I'm just skilled at it, bro. I'll tell you what.
Yeah, I'll tell you what, it is a challenge, right?
(47:53):
Yeah. Me and bad girls, right.
Have you been? Watching him all week.
Right. Have you ever seen, have you
ever seen that the the survivor or bad girls?
Yeah. Well, he goes in a desert.
Desert island? No.
The contestants. Go to the Oh no.
I've been watching that all on Netflix, I think.
Yeah, I. Don't like new stuff?
Yeah, I was told it's like 2012.Yeah, so I this is how good I
(48:17):
am, right? I bet, surely.
I know for a fact if we had no money, we got dropped in a
desert. Edwin.
Obviously. So he knows how to kill a camel
with a shoelace or something. You know what I mean?
He'll know what to do. Fair enough.
But if you put him in Gorton with no overdraft facility and
(48:43):
£1.12 in his bank and you put mein got £1.12 in my but you will.
I'm fucking smoking mate. No camels in gallon bro, trust
me I've tried she. Definitely a wig, yeah.
I think I think I should do a show Living on the bread line
you. Going to tell a story or?
(49:06):
What? No, that's it.
No, you've got to buy. Them.
Oh yeah. So I had a free bat of Paddy
Power, put that on a 20 to one shot, one bang.
We're back in the game, baby. So as it wake, if you bet you
get the profits on you don't. Get the yeah yeah yeah yeah two
£214.00 I got I had Jacob Murphyto score and James Justin to be
(49:28):
booked and. You got.
That's coming last night, mate. Ping.
Jacob Murphy was 4 to one for a goal or he's Leicester.
Ping, Jamie just sent you some money.
James James just inmate right back in a savvy bands.
I even got a dessert last night.I was on a four seat tower fast
(49:49):
as well. Broke me fast last night.
I got chippy as well. I've got 4 go stalls in the
fridge. Give me a chip.
Come. On You ever live like that,
daddy? Most of my life.
No, no, no. You live in it.
What do you have? All inclusives?
I don't know what. What does that mean?
That was, what does that mean? All inclusive.
It was a pretty just like everything.
So like you drink food. Oh no.
(50:10):
So. What?
You must have paid the fortune for that.
No, it was a wedding present. You must have a great job that
pays extremely. Well, it's probably 4 episodes
for him. It was good because we haven't
paid that in 40. That's why I could buy.
Some It was a present, was it? Yeah, it was a wedding present,
(50:31):
so we can't. It was kind of the.
Honeymoon. You got you that sort of.
Hey, sister. Oh, sister.
Yeah, or sister and brother-in-law.
OK, that's big present that whatdo you get then?
Or Kettle, Mr. and Mrs. Robes. Well, they got married before I
met them. Before I met.
What are you going to get for the birth of them?
(50:52):
I don't know. It's not going to be a holiday.
Though Yeah, usually in a shopping company with me,
weren't you? And you've been stroppy with me
this week. Yeah.
Yeah, yeah, you've said this a couple of times.
You've never got me a present for my.
Oh yeah, it was. I did say, oh, we've got stuff,
actually. Oh, what?
We've got presents. So I said that because Tony was
like, yeah, yeah, yeah, that's why we're going to get Jamie a
present, and then we're just going to do it every time now.
(51:15):
And I was like, we'll see what makes my birthday's in.
A week presents. Well, we'll see them.
I can't afford Amazon Prime anymore so it takes 2 weeks.
So we're going to get your loginfor your Netflix, if that's OK
for your presence. I ran out, Yeah, I, because I
laugh at for like stuff like that.
I had an £8.99 payment decline, you know, your skin.
(51:37):
Yeah. For Prime Video.
I mean, next notification was you can watch Big Mama's House
for free on Pluto TV. That's out of a lot.
Big Mama's house slut. So this is like address to me,
but I think it's just for the podcast.
Jews want it. Open it.
Yeah, of course I do mate. Boxing videos.
(52:00):
This is a bit patron of this. No, we can't now.
If you want to see what's in the.
Box sign up to Patriot Baby got 2.
Oh, it's really one here now, no.
No, no, no. If you want to see, sign up to
Patriots. You've heard how skinned we are,
(52:21):
man. Yeah, yeah, £3 a month.
We get like 40P of that. Don't let us.
Don't let us go on the races again with no money.
We got 40P about it. Was 33, so I'm not winning, you
know? Lad, Honestly, yeah, sat Nick
Rocket, right? Yeah, that won two big trial
races, the Thaistys and the Bobby Joe, because he got his
(52:41):
son on it, Patrick. You know, it's just a dress to
me. Lad.
Yeah, because you got that Patrick Mullins on it.
Yeah, his son, he's technically an amateur jockey, so he's not
as like. That William Mullen's son.
Yeah, yeah, yeah. He's like an amateur jockey.
Technically. He's not got professional like
(53:02):
status. So when he's on a horse, because
William, because William Mullins, his main jockey, Paul
Town, and he's one of the best ever.
So the price differences are mental, really, because Paul's
house was. Just saying the odds are more
because he's an expensive jockey, but yeah.
It's not, it's not necessarily an experience, but you get, you
(53:24):
get shit, lad. But the but the odds are still
sick though, wouldn't it? But obviously.
But the odds has got good form. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
And it should never been fit foreach one.
You'll never get a Bobby Joel winner.
Yeah. Running in the Grand National.
Jeff but he's lost loads on that, I think.
So no, I, I don't know those people who had that.
Like, no. Don't matter.
(53:44):
So the Grand National, they always make one of the bookies
because they overround it to such a high percentage.
They'll no matter what wins. They'll they'll work out in a
way no matter what wins. They're all right.
They'll make profit on the on the race, you know.
Wish I was a bookie. Because it was 14 to one in the
morning and some bookies weren'tgoing best odds guaranteed.
(54:08):
So old people having like tenders on it but egg before you
get 33 on and I don't mate off you pop.
So it start at 14 to one in the morning it was 33 to 1 by.
By Yeah, just drifted out. Yeah, violent drifts happened in
the Grand National because it's such a big market.
(54:29):
So that that's, you know, that'shappened a couple of times.
It's not major, majorly shocking.
I was surprised it went off at 33 to one to be honest given its
form, but there you go. Some Aussies just get backed
throughout the day off free card.
Bragg just got levered in. A couple of others got like my
(54:52):
Maximus got well backed in that finished second so.
That's good to all start. Yeah, he's really good.
Also had a big weight this year.Was that one?
Did that been last year? Yeah, it was last year.
So because it won last year, he has he has to have more weight
on it this year. It's like level the playing
field and yeah, yeah. And I don't think an arse is one
(55:16):
of that kind of weight in quite a while now.
Yeah. I.
Have to put the weights on your horses.
They have little weights in the saddle.
I thought it just like giving chippies in there.
(55:36):
That's not talking about racing.So, Dan, did you watch the
National? No, What was I doing?
Oh, we were. We came home Saturday, didn't
we? So oh, yeah, yeah.
And then he. Was what did you do on your last
night? Nothing, to be honest.
Yeah, nothing. Because we had we had quite a
big Wednesday. So then Thursday would be
(55:57):
hungover, but it was like the sunniest day.
So we woke up early to like enjoy the weather and I was just
fucking yeah, I was. I've started going on the water
slides because the upward slideson the hotel complex and it was
just a fucking terrible idea, lad, because it was like ones
where you're in and you're goinglike that.
And I was just coming out and I was like.
What did you go over? Yeah, from the Wednesday like in
(56:19):
the is that was mad. It was called Bill Cosby's bar
which is mad in it like the still.
Wouldn't even rough. But like halfway through the
match, it just turned into like a nightclub and it was just
like, it was just mad, you know,watching the match and there's
like dance music on in the background and stuff.
Was just get busy like. No, not really.
(56:40):
That's why. Are you on your?
Place was lovely, Yeah, it was, but yeah, this.
Was so that makes you more pissed?
Yeah. That's what, that's what like
when you know, when I'll have a couple of bevies that use
whatever and it's just like, is he alright?
That's what it is. It's yeah.
Oh, that's what I think it is anyway.
But yeah, so I was just. I don't get pissed when I'm
Willow with me. I don't get I don't get I.
(57:04):
Don't get a hangover. I'll get pissed.
I'll get pissed, Yeah. It's because you've found scared
to show. Hey, the real you.
Maybe, yeah. She like that that.
Was my tool show it paid for this fucking holiday.
(57:26):
Yeah, so that's why you just like that.
Just nest. You just ain't going like.
Are you doing mocktails? Pretend it's.
Really. Oh.
Hello, I love a cocktail on holiday mate.
Heaviest fucking pina colada mate.
I just think everything tastes better on holiday, yeah.
(57:46):
Life's just better in it. Pina colada in the sun, bro.
What a drink, man. Pina colada by the pool mate.
I fucking love sitting by the pool mate.
Do you do you get in the pool orjust sit by the?
Pool I just sleep all of. You.
I just sleep. I like both.
Like by the pool or hotel route I just love.
(58:09):
I just rest. Joy for my holiday.
I'm on a piss up. Yeah.
First thing I do is jump in the pool.
It wakes you up. And when you get out, you're in
front of people you like. Force yourself out of an
hangover. Just crawl onto some lounger.
Pee in a colada bro. Get back on it.
You know, when she had the shitsat Florida, she was really ill.
(58:32):
She was over two or three days. It was the day Conference league
final. And oh, who was in the
Conference League final is it? When we're standing.
In it, No. We're the West Ham.
Yeah. Oh, Roma, Nah.
(58:54):
Our Europa League one of the finals anyway and I had this guy
all throughout the tournament fight shots on targets and
goals. He was smashing it in the
league. He was like 7 to 4 for a shot on
target. So I was levered it just
drinking pina coladas by the pill they had like the foot yard
and he got a shot inside gettinga fucking erupted someone like
(59:16):
£600. This all my.
Lot of upstairs. So I got fucking.
I just had all I mean I mean allday got up at 10.
I just kept on coming back everycouple of hours giving them some
water and like checking in on her.
She was like, I'm going to come down for.
Sure, I'm so sorry I'm ruining the holiday.
I went. This is my holiday.
(59:37):
No, you stay. Yeah, this is my holiday.
Oh, you rest. Yeah, rest.
You're watching a 40 old age gambling.
Pina coladas everywhere. Oh mate, it's fucking great day
that that's been a great catch up by me.
It's been refreshing, refreshingly honest about our
finances. Don't worry about us, science
(59:58):
patron, if you do worry about us. £3 a month.
You get 2 bonus episodes a week.And a live shows every Friday.
Well, including, oh, including that.
Oh yeah, yeah. And.
And also you get to see what's in in the in the presence.
The box, the box, Simpsons. And then by the way, don't I
(01:00:21):
look that nice today? Colour coordinated?
You actually are like. Barcode back baby.
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(03:00):
Let's get into the episode. I'm at state Liverpool then.
Yeah, may as well might as well know.
We go together. Go together are you a big jump
All right, we're good to go I. Was waiting for you to start
(03:23):
Nick and then. Boom, we're back.
Hey, public episode. Just the boys today because I've
been on holiday. Danny's been on holiday.
Tony was ill for a bit. I had food poisoning.
And I thought we've not been in a room together.
I mean, we've been in a room together.
Well, it's not out yet. Do what?
(03:43):
I mean, the patron, Well, it's we recorded one last week,
didn't we? No, no, I've been.
I haven't been together for weeks.
What must mean you've been The live show together on me, Danny
was an holiday. I've been, I've been, I've been
in the street together. For ages because.
Say, so I made an executive position to say, let's have a
little public episode where it'sjust the boys.
(04:03):
So I think I adore in public. We had a lot of nice comments on
the Jacob episode. Thank you very much.
Oh, we had a bad comment, though.
It's funny though. Don't do it again because I was
like, it's funny. What?
Is it? You know I hate I hate reading
comments so right. Well, because we mentioned fail
on the pod with Jacob talking about that charging winger
(04:29):
Tories who's a patron of ours. He told Fiona, you get a shout
out here where we just talk about that Georgian player.
So fiance commented in the in the comments and and he got he
got what's like a strike or something.
What do you got on YouTube if you comment stuff like a
warning, basically, And when yougot a fucking warning for that
(04:52):
because he called us uncultured swines and stuff, just jokingly,
right. And And when you got a fucking
warning for that after the thousands of comments where
we're getting fat cunts, ugly ginger, meth, this never
happened, right? Do you know what I mean?
We got low. We got tons of bad comments.
(05:14):
Yeah. And we never see one getting
flagged up. I feel like I know.
Yeah. Although it did make me laugh.
There's a comment on that Jacob episode, right?
Wouldn't just look at me now. This guy said what I look like
and he said I look like, all right, let me just, I don't want
(05:36):
to influence your decision. Just look at me.
Yeah, I think you look like a beautiful boy.
He said I look like a plate of food from Benidorm.
Oh my God, that's the funniest thing I've ever heard playing
(06:00):
featuring Benny Dolan. These comments are ruthless.
I think what what made the worstwas you have beige shorts on so
it looked like you'd had no short shorts on at all to be
skin coloured and your hoodie was beige as well so it was
just. And there was quite a high up,
weren't there? Yeah, someone said.
Why does Jamie insist on wearingclothes that make him look like
(06:22):
he's naked? Something like that.
Kind of. Can you crop a picture of what I
look like and the comment pleaseand?
A place of Benadu. Benadu.
I just put a peel. Jamie, it's.
Not the difference. That is funny.
That one. That's hilarious.
That was a great. Some of them are class, are
they? But I yeah, I don't read them.
Yeah, yeah. So if you, if you, if you
(06:44):
listen, if you create a few insults, that's fine.
But that was funny that that tickled me that I, I think, to
be honest, when I got told that I forgot what I was wearing, I
thought you said it about me face, because I'm Ginger and
Blotcher. I mean it, it might have been
that as well. I'm just saying I think.
Wow, that's what I need. Between on top of it.
(07:06):
I think Oh no, it's class though.
Very funny. Yeah, so I had, I had lots of
people sending me pictures of donkeys.
Lots of people. So what did you just do?
What did you just do? You.
Want to do me? It was.
(07:27):
It was obviously you. I had nothing to do.
Messages on Instagram was just full of them and Twitter was
full of them. So I know you just said
something while I was off sick fighting for me life.
I had loads of people say I was off sick because sent aside to
leave as. Well, that's why I didn't say
that. Yeah, I know that's serious as
well. I went yeah.
Because The thing is it's like it's it's, it's obviously a
(07:50):
massive Liverpool fan, but it's also really, really close so.
It's actually a family friend aswell.
With the Alexander Arnold, I don't know, he wants to poop
him, but he's like, I want to get his dream or something.
That's. Awful lot I.
Think he's all right, Kim? Yeah.
I went to Blackpool, did the sound users on the podcast.
(08:12):
Callum told us that you have been to Blackpool.
Right, so went to Blackpool. Oh, that's where.
Yeah, and I think I've obviouslygot food poisoning from there.
Because you got that one pound burger.
Yeah, it was closed, was it? Yes.
So then we went to like this with the big please.
It was £6.50. I think I got food poisoning
from there. I think I would have been
alright with the 1 LB burger that yeah, I just felt as soon
as I had to have felt weird. The weird and the.
(08:33):
Next day I woke up and I just couldn't keep anything out or
did was waiting because I was waking up like 6 more messages
while they said I'm just being sick again.
Weird cheap burgers, man. Yeah, Blackpool was sick, by the
way. I didn't realise how boss it is.
No. It's, it's so good.
Yeah, yeah, yeah. We, I was like a little kid just
going around. Just fucking just do it.
Just playing the football. You're like the footy thing.
(08:54):
You've got to get enough in the in the little.
Oh yeah, yeah, yeah, just class lad.
Just a big kid. Just properly live your
childhood, don't you? Yeah.
Smoking. I would say he's like cans, cans
of fucking and kind of stuff. It's good to leave your
childhood, isn't it? Yeah.
You'd agree with that. That's good.
Why is that? You.
That's good. That's good.
(09:14):
I'm glad you agree. I've had a good week.
You've had a good week. Last week I've had a bad week,
like money wise and shit national weekend and stuff, but
I've had a good week, like right, I get into stuff, I get
into things. Yeah, not many like might be
(09:35):
away from the norm, like people just see me.
Yeah, he's fucking. His first fork is cool.
No one says what? No one's ever said that.
But they say you're funny and you're a nice guy.
Yeah, you're a nice guy. You're funny.
(10:00):
But I have like I lead into somethings that some lads will like
call, you know? Gay.
Gay, you're a lot cool. Whatever.
Yeah, yeah. So like that, that isn't gay.
No, I didn't say that. I'm just saying like that's what
other people might think is gay.No, it's not.
What's that? What's gay about darts?
(10:22):
Right. I don't know, I really like
that. Yeah, that's amazing.
Don't come to it. Don't even start with darts
because you don't know what we're about to tell you.
So many, many years ago, right? Right.
Listen, no, I'm just going to behonest now.
Yeah, right. I've been watching this kid play
(10:45):
Pokémon Red. Yeah, the first version, because
I never completed Pokémon Red. I used I used to get stuck after
the 3rd gym for for really, You know, whatever it's called
Lieutenant Sarge, whatever it's called the Thunder guy used to
beat him and didn't know how to get forever right.
She always got killed in DouglasCave and that.
(11:07):
So I've been watching him play it yeah, I've been so into it
because he's doing 100% work forlike get all the missing items
and that stuff like you need like moon stones and shit.
Yeah, so I've just been watchinghim for hours lad, and I've been
falling asleep to it to watch onYouTube and just put on the side
and it's got all the all the theJapanese music for the game by.
(11:35):
All that stuff. Yeah.
And I fall asleep. You know the Pokémon music,
don't you? Yeah, yeah, yeah.
And I fall asleep to it. I've been dreaming about
Pokémon. So I've been watching.
Wake up, watch Pokémon all day, then go to sleep by thinking of
it, dreaming about it. So I've Youtubed how to get an
(12:01):
emulator on my phone. So I've got a Game Boy, an
emulator and I've started Pokémon Red and I've been
playing Pokémon Red and me character's called Moz.
Oh that's the worst. And the rival's called Dad.
I don't know what's more sad, right?
(12:22):
The fact you've watched a kid play it.
How long did you watch him play it for?
Did you complete it? I've not completed it yet.
It's I've done, I've done like 21 episodes of about 45 minutes
long each once an hour and a half.
That was a special one because he has to go to Pokémon.
So I'm 14 hours of Pokémon Red. He has to go to Pokémon Yellow
to get certain items for the 100% work from Pokémon Red and
(12:44):
he trades them through. So I've watched a good.
Yeah, good. 14. 12, yeah. 15 hours, yeah.
And then I was just like, I can't stop thinking about it.
So I was looking at the other side.
Google you all these. I don't know if you get them in
your algorithm. I get them every second video,
Joe. Like if you're 30, you need this
Retro advanced. Yeah, it's got 10,000 games.
(13:06):
Yeah, yeah. They look sick though.
They look sick, but. I know there's a con.
I don't know why I. Just don't know why, but I know
you're going to have to downloadsomething else and I don't know
how to do things like that. So I just I YouTube.
How to get an emulator on your phone?
So I've I've, I, I didn't think it would work.
I thought, let me just try it. Downloaded this app called Delta
(13:29):
and Google Pokémon red Omega download generation one, but you
got to do it on Chrome, not safari.
And it just fucking worked. I thought this has actually
worked. So I've just honestly, like I
got here at 1. Lauren dropped me off because
she just got her nails done. So oh, you dropped me off at the
station and said, Oh yeah, you'll be a bit early though if
(13:49):
you record it. So I went, Oh no, that's fine,
but what about it? I'll just and I got in at one
year, got off the train. I was like, oh, an hour to kill
because normally I might last minute hour because of how
awkward the trains are. NUMA Vanity Cup Reds Coast train
as well. Got off the train.
(14:13):
Yeah, and I've just have a little bite to eat.
So it's just a bit small. I'm going to sit in Lime St.
Central because you're going to start a few phone and stuff
inside. Less interaction just playing
Pokémon. Yeah, playing Pokémon with a
fish finger boy, who's one of the best hours I've had in
weeks, man. Just a fish finger Butty.
(14:33):
Fish finger boy Pokémon red Pokémon Red.
You know my problem with it is. I tell you what, I didn't know I
was a kid. How bloody good Needle King was.
Who's the Oh? Boy get get a nitter on, yeah?
What's that? Get a little nitter on, like a
little rabbit thing with an arm.So you get a nitter on, Yeah.
(14:57):
Train out to Nitterino, and thenwhen you go through the moon
cave, when you go through the old Mount Moon, when you go
through, when you go through Mount Moon, you get a moonstone.
Yeah. And then you can level up
Nitterino to Needle King becauseyou need a moonstone to do it
and I never knew that as a kid. And Needle King is a fucking bad
(15:18):
man mate. You thought Charizard was a bad
man? Needle King is a bad man.
Have you got it now? I've got needle king, I've got
ASP team at the minute I've got I've got needle king, a cadabra,
Abra, cadabra. No, not abra Cadabra, just
cadabra. I had that bro.
Then he falls to Cadabra. Cadabra Needle King Rattata.
(15:45):
What did you pick for your Your your?
Did you just pick your first Pokémon?
Charmander, did you? I've got so Needle King Rattata.
Charmander Needle, King Cadabra.Rattata, Chameleon, Pikachu.
(16:12):
You've got Pikachu as well. Yeah, Veridian Forest level 5,
level 15. What's 361?
I've got loads in like in, built, stored in.
Built. Have you got any water type
Pokémon? That's well, I've I've got a
fellow training in Magic Carp, Joe, Magic Carp Little.
(16:35):
All it does is all it does is splash.
That's his already move, so you think he's a Diva, but if you go
to the Pokémon daycare centre, this guy goes a look after your
Pokémon for the fee you give himyour Pokémon.
And every step you take, the police, every step you take, it
(16:58):
gets one XP so you can train it while you're just mooching
about. And then it turns into a Juridos
and Juridos is on fucking but inyou know.
And how long does it take that? I've only just.
It's only just been looking. Have you done all this in an
hour? No, not in an hour.
I've been playing it all week. Oh, you downloaded this this
(17:19):
week? Yeah, yeah, I've just been
playing on the cell phone, ignoring me bad and that.
Are you going to do any of this or you just you're just going to
like go out of this after this for a little?
While I don't know, you know, we'll say because I've never,
ever gone past the third badge. What's happened to the darts
career? Oh, I've been playing.
I've been doing well, you know. Yeah, the total average was
(17:40):
going to the 40s for the first time.
I did 19 dart like they were there.
My mate always beats me like we've played like 30 games, it's
like 25. Five to it, but beaten 4 nil
back-to-back. They were there, yeah.
I missed 66 for a 132 finish, missed the bullseye for a 112 5.
(18:08):
So what like that 123? You were hitting the bullseye in
general. You know, if you have to hit it,
do. You know, our mate, I had, I had
135. Yeah, 135 is bullseye.
Treble 15, double 20, boom, first start, bullseye.
I'm I usually get like the 25 oryou know, the thin part of the
(18:32):
number. So I've got boom bulls like your
proper in the middle as well. What that is a bull's eye mate.
That's a bull's pupil, Bull's eye bang.
Red dots on your head. Red dot on your head.
Hey, red dot on your tip. We all belong outside.
(18:57):
We're drawn to nature. Whether it's the recorded sounds
of the ocean we doze off to or the succulents that adorn our
homes, nature makes all of our lives, well, better.
Despite all this, we often go about our busy lives removed
from it. But the outdoors is closer than
we realize with All Trails. You can discover trails nearby
and explore confidently with offline maps and on trail
(19:20):
navigation. Download the free app today.
Ryan Reynolds here for Mint Mobile.
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Oh. So I got bang bullseye bullseye.
(20:06):
No, we're doing left-handed bullseye trouble. 15 double top
for 135 and glue double top normally fucking just under 115,
but your. Favorite double?
Do you know what? Probably 6.
I mean it was always double 16. I was able to get double 16 but
(20:28):
I've got so good at double top at the minute because that's 66.
That's my mates as well, that side of the board.
I prefer the other side. I think it's because they have
wonky. I like 16 and 8 but tops I was
always bad at but during my general gameplay because I'm
releasing the darts so like bad.I'm getting loads of double
(20:50):
twatters in my gameplay. Yeah, Oh yeah, just going for
triple 20. I'm going for treble, but don't
call it triple. It's treble.
So it's like I. Hate the word triple?
That goes for you. Nah.
Just you like a triple Decker. What a triple Decker sandwich.
(21:11):
If it's meant to be triple, yeah.
It's like if you watch the Olympics, you don't call it the
treble jump, would you? Why is it?
What's the difference between several and?
Double I don't know, but they'rethe rules bro.
Those there for a reason. I like go so late.
It's I got a lot of double twatters.
(21:33):
So I'll get 100 and rather than 62 twatters often I'll get 2
double 20s and a 20. So I'll just know like bang
double twat what? About you done What have you
been up to Turkey? Haven't you been?
Yeah, man. Yeah, it was decent to be fit.
What did you get done? Nothing.
They'd buy a shit loads of fake clothes though, so if you see me
(21:53):
in anything except for trainees and that's got a logo on it,
it's probably from Turkey. Was it cheap?
Was it like this? Lad, this was a fiver and I was
like. Yeah, I can tell.
But I was like, even if I went to like Primark, it's cheaper
than Primark, so we don't get it.
I'm not asked that it's fake. It's just cheap clothes that I'm
falling apart. The thing is, what is a fake
(22:14):
clothes though is that? What?
It's fake? That's.
What I mean I'm not. Asked.
Yeah, yeah, I decided. Fucking Lacoste.
One of like fucking crocodile ordamned or something.
Oh, the fact that was that big, Yeah.
It's not weird, though. You haven't got fake stuff on it
and you didn't know. It was like bang on.
And then someone pointed out that was horrible.
(22:36):
It's not fake. Who got it from Elaine?
Yeah, it's Elaine. Fell off a wagon.
He was sick. Mate.
She used to sell fucking Burger King burgers.
One I was unreal. 6 months that six months of Burger King
burgers bro. We are the guy that don't
chicken legends, you know, like the chicken burgers out to them,
like Rob them. They were that was good.
(22:58):
Just chicken legends all the time.
What did you do and say he done?Not much we're in all.
We were in like at all inclusive, like resort sort of
things. We were in and the hotel wasn't,
not the hotel. The weather was a bit shift for
the past couple of the first couple of days but it was nice
because like when we went shopping and stuff it wasn't
like beer and a half and bollocks off.
Where is it, Marmaris? No, no Antalya sort around
(23:20):
there. That's where everyone gets the
seeds done. I think I think they go Lara
Beach. Antalya dog do.
That's where they're surveillance.
What a dental thing. Oh, I was.
Thinking of spills and strain onshaky.
Teeth. Yeah, so.
What did you get done? You get your cock bigger.
Nah, I wish I did though. I mean, like I told you, yeah,
(23:41):
you got a pin. What?
Yeah, I've got loads of emails. Odd.
How do you get How do you get your cock bigger?
They cut the answer I told you about this, Then they cut, they
cut, they open it, and then you've got more Dick inside your
body. Like, you know, the way your
tongue goes down to your Dick's similar.
So the, the cut, you know, like the bottom of your Dick sort of
thing that's holding. Yeah, they cut that.
(24:01):
And what about your fat pouch? Dick out?
Have you got a fat pouch? This spear.
Yeah, like the fat pouch. Like Kangaroos for some fat
pouch. Yeah, but when you lose weight,
your Dick looks bigger because of it, because you'd have like
that, this and then that this bebut yeah, but then you do that
and then you pull your Dick out.I don't know how they then sort
of fill the void with skin. But yeah, you can make your Dick
bigger. That's the first thing.
If I got though, that's might the first thing that'd be.
(24:23):
How much have I cost? I guess it's a few grand.
Why? Why?
Because I'm pissing on me balls.Mine's like a little baby's
cock, lad. I don't see the baby's cock
like. But.
I did find something out about myself whilst we were away.
Oh, are you gay? I am sick of volleyball.
(24:48):
Volleyball. Volleyball lad.
You are like a Labrador though Ican imagine you are like the
volleyball. Swear to God I was.
Yeah. It's on it.
Yeah, it. Doesn't don't really do that
fucking it's slapping. Oh, it's there that.
I don't remember to hear. Who was you playing volleyball
with? Just like random, it was like,
you know, like the hotel have like entertainment and stuff.
(25:09):
You went in a volleyball tournament.
It's a kids You went. You refereed an under fourteens
volleyball tournament. It was just like, you know, the
way the hotel. Made friends over there.
Not lad it was. Do you make friends with couples
on holiday? No not not really, but we
definitely couldn't yet. I made friends with some old
German fella because everyone was German there like every
(25:33):
there was. No, come on Danny, with the
stereotypes. No, they literally were.
Tea towers on the sun lounges, was it?
So it, it was mad like it was like as if that Hitler won the
war, like there was one other English couple in the whole
hotel. It was mad because like no one
obviously that spoke English even like the staff, no.
(25:54):
One. Yeah, it's got, yeah.
It's probably there. Spain though, isn't it?
Yeah, it must be because everyone it was mad.
And you got speaking to a Germanfella, yeah?
Sort of, yeah. He kept talking to me in German,
but I couldn't understand the word he.
Was saying you do look German though.
You look like you've got proper German fucking pedo.
There was a few people who thought I was Dutch.
(26:14):
I was like, Nah, Nah, Nah. I'm from England, yeah.
You're cool to be Dutch. You're.
Not an English Large Scouse, you.
Know it's a wall. You paid 120 for this one. 10s
wall. That's nice, so nice, relaxing
(26:35):
the holiday playing on the volleyball.
Yeah. Did you have an authentic German
authentic Turkish kebab? Why was that?
I think so. I mean, the hotel had kebabs.
Like no from a Turkish boss man mate.
Yeah. Oh, no, no, we did go out.
We went out for food to watch the match.
This fella called Rambo, I don'tknow if I put pictures up on
Instagram, was the sickest man of all.
(26:56):
Like we said, we were from Liverpool and he was like, I
love Liverpool, I love Lola. So then I was like, so then he
was like, you come here and I'llsort you out.
Like I'll like you didn't say box you off, but he basically
said take his face and box you off.
And then like we turned up, he'dset up like a table with all
like rose petals on and stuff like in front of the telly.
So the telly was there and he was just on top of us the whole
night. Just pizza.
(27:18):
Rambo was the fucking boy. What?
Was that picture? And he was like, do I find his
back? Sure.
All of them. Probably.
Oh, there's one where you look like proper, like over
stimulating. Yeah.
Oh. Yeah, it's when I'm like.
Yeah, yeah. But I said, well, how happy is
he's like a Labrador. That's why I.
Put it up because it's fucking like.
That he. Was doing all the fun.
(27:39):
Are you getting sensory overload?
Yeah. Yeah, you'll like an epileptic
and laser. Question SO.
It's not just for talking about me behind back.
It was like, look how happy we said.
Look, how happy is this away from us?
Yeah, I actually wish I was thathappy.
That's. What I said, I wish I was not.
(28:01):
Happy. Then we had six hours of calling
it, call it ourselves, bums. We've had a bum week.
Last it started, yeah, we've gota bad week.
It's the worst. It's the worst week I've ever.
Had it's been bad lad. Like on Friday, the live show
you'll see if you see the live, go and check out the live show
(28:22):
guys. All you have to do is tune
patreon.com/hotwater screening podcast 3 LB above.
Sign up all our live shows everyFriday.
They're on there and you get to see last week's live show, which
is one of the funniest. Live shows funniest.
I've ever been. Because we'd fully given up,
we'd fully give it up and most like, fuck it, let's go for it.
(28:43):
And it was funny Lot. Yeah, we were skinned.
Obviously we've not been paid. I tried to get an advance on
your wages and that got turned out.
So we was. So we just, we kept on like
getting the audience spies too. We're like that.
(29:08):
We started off as a joke and then we just went, oh what do
you do mate? I can't go to the bar.
Saying go to the bar all night. Well, it was so.
Funny. Wonderful.
I don't want to say to you much because obviously.
Let's go watch it, but. It's it's honestly on a funny if
you if you can just tell at me and just look down at you before
(29:29):
we're on stage and went, you know what, let's just enjoy this
because we've got an awful left and we, me and Jamie enjoyed it
and a crowd seeing that me and him enjoying it.
So it was just like, like it was.
The atmosphere was funny, lad, Yeah.
That's what makes it If you two were in, if you two were up 40,
the show was. We were like up 40 though.
We were that sad. We we give it up, but we were
(29:51):
like, let's just go out on our shield.
Right. I mean skin, yeah, skint because
at the start of the month, the way it works, yeah, is I have
this corridor of uncertainty. Like the brine has just put a
ball in the corridor of uncertainty.
Yeah it's my direct debits come out on the 1st for me rent and
that always the first so I always make sure I've got that
(30:17):
in got that age can't kick me out that's all I aim for you
it's. Not getting.
Kicked out, we get paid usually like the 5th. 6th, 5th to 6th.
5th to 6th, yeah, National we kind of thought right, I've got
a little bit say, you know, it might be late this week because
the craze have gone to the races, all right, Probably
(30:40):
fucking heavy arm in some bookies out taxing bookies.
All right mate, you're in our patch.
All right, I've heard Billy Kimber's men.
I want a picture of Aintree justbeen taken over by the Blaze.
We will meet them there in our own terms.
(31:04):
Philly Kimberly Yeah, so HR I couldn't pick my fucking hoop I
had last year. Ain'tra I fucking smashed it.
So Chalm and HR last year with great farmer.
Chalm was good this year, don't get me wrong, but that was a
(31:25):
long time ago, bro. That was 3 weeks ago.
A lot moved since then. So done with bollocks, which is
sound, you know, 'cause we're getting paid to and it just
like, oh, it's been, it's been delayed and stuff.
It won't be till Tuesday or Wednesday this week, which is
when we're recording now. Still not been paid.
I'll keep you posted. So we're fucking skin blood.
(31:49):
I mean skin. I don't.
Want to tell the story? Yeah.
Go. So you went the races on
Saturday? Right.
I often tell you because Jamie knows.
Yeah, I thought just tell Jamie won't tell anyone else in the
world. You look, you guys are lucky.
This is the most saddest thing ever.
I said, how can I even want to tell you this?
(32:10):
So funny. I got invited to the race on
Saturday by the Green Room Experience, which is funny
because we're the green room. They're the green room.
And by the way, I'm not even just saying it because it was a
free ticket. I think my invite was in the
post Cheers guys. Didn't invite you?
No, just me because I'm a local celeb and the green room
(32:32):
experience invited me because Paul Smith couldn't go.
And I'm basically honestly, I'm not just saying it because I
went there and like all the I was source all day for course
meal that fancy and all that. It was fucking unbelievable
experience. Like I've been I've been going
since I was 1617, always went ona first day.
(32:54):
The fact like the Liverpool day,the Family Day, which is most
quiet, I believe, about fucking disease involved now and then as
getting old and more like you gowith the lads, you go ladies.
They obviously, you know what I mean.
So I've never done a national anthestati and I'm from
Liverpool, you know what I mean?So it's on our doorstep.
It's you have to take that off. Obviously these people come up
from all around the world that goes to it.
So I when I got advice of thought, I've got to go, as
(33:17):
Jamie just explained, it's been asking.
It's like it's, it's a man's exactly the same.
Everything comes out on just before and so does you get you
go, you go through that 3-4 daysof having football.
Yeah, nothing I'll get some vices and see experience of
thoughts. I've got to go.
I can't not go. So goes goes with the running
running Cray either a bit of a stinker.
(33:40):
I didn't want to ask him as well.
Don't ask anyone to let you lendmoney or whatever, but I'd say
like 50-60 quid on me to their bets yeah, so for that's not
that's not for one or like if wego, but it's still sound.
You know what I mean still, and if it was paid for so don't
really need anything anyway. So for fucking thoughts, So the
(34:01):
guest there, the clean room experience fantastic looked
after unbelievable. AP McCoy was there doing like a
little talk before the compare. There was funny, proper funny
fella Just he done his like background on there's all like
local local celebs there or Zen lists and stuff like that.
You know what I mean? And it's.
(34:22):
Just the irony of it, but go on through.
Yeah, no. I don't see that.
It's just that's what makes it sound like.
Sorry, I know who I am and everyone on our table was there.
Like on our table it was like 810 different people all sound
fucking got on with them all Welsh like got got the
instagrams after it. You know what I mean?
All that and everything sounds all nice people.
Did you recruit any guests? Maybe, possibly possibly you.
(34:47):
Should have been misusing me bro.
Possibly, but basically I'm justexplaining all that because it's
ends a little bit because straight away I'm fucking on the
ale bladder. I had a brand new suit on both
the parts had new shoes on. You know when you get new shoes
like the shift liquors and and and they're a bit too small, you
(35:11):
get caught up. Yeah and my toes were like this
all day. So cosmic toe.
My toes are sore in them and walk like on my tip toes a
little bit. You know what I mean?
Like an arse in the paddock. Then after like a few hours my
calf starting because I'm walking fully and then after
that my back starts in because we and I'm thinking I'm ready
(35:32):
for the scrap yard here mate, they need to put a bullet in my
head and a man of fucking horses.
Yeah I'm finished right fucking shake keeps coming out of me
pants and fucking I'm just flustered them hard.
I'm sweaty. First race comes, I thought it's
got £50 here so goes to go be better and better.
AB says no you need some proof of address and all that to put
(35:53):
more money in this shit. Message Jamie.
Hello Jamie any tips? Said Oh yeah I want to do this
one Me said laddie I sent sent you £20, sent him £20 so put
that on for me to win first raceit was like 13 to two or
something so I put £20. I'm only got 150 back mate.
It was winning all the way it all the way and got pipped right
(36:18):
at the end. By a Mongol.
By a stupid Mongols, yeah. So say to me I'm like if that
were the one that you you paid for your bets all day that's all
I want is you don't have 20 gridon each race.
It's all answered. 6H is 120. Probably had £50.
Yeah. So next minute fucking Apple
(36:38):
comes out. Apple don't even know why I pay
for an Apple 599. You know Apple TV 599.
Oh, you bastard. So now I've got 24 par left.
Yeah, I thought, shit, what we're going to do here?
I just got a bet on a favorite on the next race just to get me
(36:59):
money over there, you know what I mean?
So back to favorite, put £20 on it, gets £7060 back 70, go back
with that and back in then, you know what I mean?
So best TVL Jamie, who we got for this one?
I don't know. Yeah, fucking whatever I said,
lad. I didn't like the race.
You didn't like the race. I said that what I said.
So I explained what I was going to do.
He said, yeah, it's what that. Well, that's the only thing you
(37:21):
can do. Like you just skip Bob just
sounds so Asian. Was sent in another 20 so
already had four with left to bebank.
Imperial St. Imperial St. was yeah, yeah.
Sent them £20 come nowhere. Sansbury won it, right.
Won it last year from the front,similar to how it did this year.
(37:41):
But this year it's just run likea pig, lad.
Because I like I like course previous course forms massively
important for intra. It's a bit of a specialist
track. Do you know what I mean?
It's a pretty unique track. So all that go well there tends
to go well the year after and the year after and stuff buyers
(38:02):
fault. This is I can't see this lad
because it's been running so bad.
So we've got so it's it's flopped.
Yeah, I'm down to 4 LB. Yeah.
But listen, don't need much money.
I've got you know me. Drinks are sorted, can get on
whatever, you know what I mean? It's it's not about that.
You may put just obviously betting and so well, so
(38:29):
basically, honestly, I'm not even saying it.
The gaffe where there was a screen experience was fucking
like unbelievable. Every time I'd finished my drink
and put it down like the waiterscome over and go, we had and
you'd have a fresh one straight away.
I was having Guinness. Yeah.
And I must have put 12 to bed. Yeah.
So I'm glad that I I can't see right.
(38:50):
And as you know, I normally, youknow.
Partaking. You know, get on stuff on the
coffee because it's public trying to be a little bit better
anyway, I get on it. Yeah, I didn't, obviously,
because you know, in the nationsand stuff it's from the dogs and
all that. Could be ass fucking getting
(39:10):
nicked in there. So I just I didn't swear with
it. So I've had no stuff.
So I'm just bloody. I can't see right.
I'm fucked right and also upset because I've lost my money and
sitting there thinking fuck sake.
So message me dad, you know, sayif you send me some money, the
signals obviously in aunties fucked innit.
So just trying to connect on WhatsApp and that I'm falling
(39:32):
bladdered. That goes with ciggies chatting
shit to someone me dad, my dad hasn't seen his message comes
back to the table and and the Grand National's about to go off
by 10 minutes for the race. So we had a fourth fucking.
There's no point now can't be arsed, you know what I mean?
And then but I'm like every our table was all like speaking to
(39:55):
each other and that it was getting all honestly
unbelievable people, but most people have met for a while and
I feel bad that's because. Everyone was saying, oh wow,
what else you've got on this one?
So what have you on this one? So I was, the book was open on
you like you get like a a bulletobviously with all the race in
it. And a book was there and I just
(40:17):
looked at this horse and I just went, yeah, I've got this on.
Yeah. What was it called?
Nick Crockett. So I said glad.
Oh, 15 minutes for the race. I went.
I've got Nick Rockets on. Yeah.
And this, this fella opposite me, older fella, it's like, oh,
really told you fancy that? I said yeah, yeah, I've been all
week. And yeah, in my head I'm just
(40:38):
picked a random horse because I didn't want to say I've got no
money. I can't bet or you know what I
mean? I'm just being honest.
I should have been honest. So instead of that, This is why
I've done a stand up thing aboutit.
I just lie to people just because don't let them down, you
know? Like that's why I feel I'm just
like, I just went, oh, I've got this awesome.
And he got up this I went yeah, go on.
(41:01):
I fancied that as well. But like I was thinking, yeah,
yes. And then just didn't think any.
I'm still thinking bladdered andthen watching the National and
lads, I just in my head, in the back of my head, I'm thinking
what if this comes in now? Yeah.
And I've got no money on it and.You've got to celebrate.
And I've got to celebrate lads, right?
(41:23):
It's fucking two fences to go. It's just, it's just winning and
always. And I'm thinking what am I going
to do? I'm getting out of this.
Everyone's going so easy. I'm going yay Rice Ladie wins.
Yeah, everybody has everyone added on because I said it.
Everyone's one bounce, one of them with £1500.
(41:46):
I went. Sorry, fucking boss, you like to
pick And I was like yeah, yeah. And he went how much?
I said I only hadn't sent it to me, to me account.
So I have just put that on. Yeah, it's still fucking £350 on
it. I went, yeah, yeah, I had. 4.
Pound in the bank, I was fuckingcunt.
(42:07):
Oh, this week I don't. Why didn't I lie?
Don't I just say it? Why didn't?
Because because I've been racista lot of times, you just say I'm
sitting this one out because it was the national.
You don't sit the national out. Everyone else, all women have 50
each way, or at least you know what I mean.
I had nothing. But yeah, I've just had to admit
(42:29):
that said because it's way of telling the story.
At least you've got something out of it anyway.
Fucking laugh out of it. Listen and that teaches you a
lesson. Just be honest with people.
And say, well, I'm a Bullock. I'm couldn't bet on it.
No, but I hope that teach you a lesson going forward where you
keep saying, yeah, I'm just on Islington.
(42:50):
There in a minute. Oh yeah, be so far too.
Honest to God, if you just can do that fucking that clean room
experience, it's fucking unbelievable.
I think they do like Cheltenham as well and other places, but
it's just because obviously if you've got if you've got a bit
of extra money and you want to do it properly and all that
you're doing is if you use just do it because you know you get
(43:11):
your ale sauce all day yeah, thepeople there just just dead
welcoming you get like you get all all your stuff, all your
betting stuff. You get tips off like a a a
legend jockey or trainer you come into talks to compares
fantastic. That's funny.
Don't all like his research on everyone and was just ripping
everyone. You know what I mean?
And yeah, it was just a fucking bell today.
(43:32):
So shouts out the green room experience.
And who knows, maybe next year we could go as the green.
Room. That's the green room that's
working a collab, baby. I know I got invited last year,
but I couldn't make it last year.
Yeah, I think I had a gig or something, but I'll draw it.
Might. I might keep it free next year
and we'll do it next year together.
(43:53):
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, definitely.
You need to strap a couple of Gopros on your two faces and
just watch. It oh, we got 140 that you. 240
faces do. We'd have to do a vlog.
That would be good. Vlog would be sick.
Yeah, just getting pissed and losing it.
How much have you got on this one, Tony?
Oh, it's £20. Oh lads.
(44:13):
I wouldn't say you often do me bollocks on camera.
On camera. I can't believe you've never
done anything like that before. What?
Anything to do with betting on camera?
You know what I mean? It's.
A bitch. I don't want to encourage people
there. We all belong outside.
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(44:33):
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(44:59):
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It's a battle. Yeah, I don't want I don't want
it to like so I've been asked, Igot asked Cheltenham to like
(45:41):
I've been asked a few times fromyour tipsters on Twitter, like
I'll plug me service, I'll give you some dough.
All right. Now, I don't work with tipsters,
man. And someone tried.
I never get asked for anything. Sound drop me, drop me.
I never get asked to do anything.
Just fucking normal me. I wear like clothes on it, but I
(46:04):
don't I don't get paid for it. I just like get get free teacher
that to sound it. So I want to sell out.
So just give me something to sell.
What? Do you want to sell out?
Doing shout out for Duchene on here.
Lord Duchene. Yeah, I was safe because it was
(46:28):
just a boss table. I just, I hate just the only
thing I hate about the races, I didn't have to because it's in,
in one of the in one of the likeone of the main stands as well.
Yeah, I've been, I've been the, I've been races before, wherever
now I fight for the cards like I've here.
Yeah. But.
Oh, so it's not that bad. Then I was a bit embarrassed,
like, oh. No, I've done it last year at
(46:49):
child. The money last year.
At child you wouldn't lie though.
Would you like me? No, last year I would.
I feel, I feel like. I've got it online.
Me. You get better, that's what.
I'm saying. All day.
Yeah, put £50 on it lad, that's.What I'm saying all day.
Yeah, I did it. Well, I did it last year.
(47:11):
Childhood did I where not only I've run out of money, I
couldn't get cash out. I didn't mean limit online and I
hit cash limit. I didn't realize I had like 4
ton cash limit or something on me bank.
Oh yeah, yeah. So I could only get £80 out, but
(47:32):
£40 each, right? Last £80 it one at 3031.
That was I yesterday. Yeah.
Moved skin, right? Yeah, yeah.
Wait, listen, I've been skinned loads times on how to live skin.
I'm just skilled at it, bro. I'll tell you what.
Yeah, I'll tell you what, it is a challenge, right?
(47:53):
Yeah. Me and bad girls, right.
Have you been? Watching him all week.
Right. Have you ever seen, have you
ever seen that the the survivor or bad girls?
Yeah. Well, he goes in a desert.
Desert island? No.
The contestants. Go to the Oh no.
I've been watching that all on Netflix, I think.
Yeah, I. Don't like new stuff?
Yeah, I was told it's like 2012.Yeah, so I this is how good I
(48:17):
am, right? I bet, surely.
I know for a fact if we had no money, we got dropped in a
desert. Edwin.
Obviously. So he knows how to kill a camel
with a shoelace or something. You know what I mean?
He'll know what to do. Fair enough.
But if you put him in Gorton with no overdraft facility and
(48:43):
£1.12 in his bank and you put mein got £1.12 in my but you will.
I'm fucking smoking mate. No camels in gallon bro, trust
me I've tried she. Definitely a wig, yeah.
I think I think I should do a show Living on the bread line
you. Going to tell a story or?
(49:06):
What? No, that's it.
No, you've got to buy. Them.
Oh yeah. So I had a free bat of Paddy
Power, put that on a 20 to one shot, one bang.
We're back in the game, baby. So as it wake, if you bet you
get the profits on you don't. Get the yeah yeah yeah yeah two
£214.00 I got I had Jacob Murphyto score and James Justin to be
(49:28):
booked and. You got.
That's coming last night, mate. Ping.
Jacob Murphy was 4 to one for a goal or he's Leicester.
Ping, Jamie just sent you some money.
James James just inmate right back in a savvy bands.
I even got a dessert last night.I was on a four seat tower fast
(49:49):
as well. Broke me fast last night.
I got chippy as well. I've got 4 go stalls in the
fridge. Give me a chip.
Come. On You ever live like that,
daddy? Most of my life.
No, no, no. You live in it.
What do you have? All inclusives?
I don't know what. What does that mean?
That was, what does that mean? All inclusive.
It was a pretty just like everything.
So like you drink food. Oh no.
(50:10):
So. What?
You must have paid the fortune for that.
No, it was a wedding present. You must have a great job that
pays extremely. Well, it's probably 4 episodes
for him. It was good because we haven't
paid that in 40. That's why I could buy.
Some It was a present, was it? Yeah, it was a wedding present,
(50:31):
so we can't. It was kind of the.
Honeymoon. You got you that sort of.
Hey, sister. Oh, sister.
Yeah, or sister and brother-in-law.
OK, that's big present that whatdo you get then?
Or Kettle, Mr. and Mrs. Robes. Well, they got married before I
met them. Before I met.
What are you going to get for the birth of them?
(50:52):
I don't know. It's not going to be a holiday.
Though Yeah, usually in a shopping company with me,
weren't you? And you've been stroppy with me
this week. Yeah.
Yeah, yeah, you've said this a couple of times.
You've never got me a present for my.
Oh yeah, it was. I did say, oh, we've got stuff,
actually. Oh, what?
We've got presents. So I said that because Tony was
like, yeah, yeah, yeah, that's why we're going to get Jamie a
present, and then we're just going to do it every time now.
(51:15):
And I was like, we'll see what makes my birthday's in.
A week presents. Well, we'll see them.
I can't afford Amazon Prime anymore so it takes 2 weeks.
So we're going to get your loginfor your Netflix, if that's OK
for your presence. I ran out, Yeah, I, because I
laugh at for like stuff like that.
I had an £8.99 payment decline, you know, your skin.
(51:37):
Yeah. For Prime Video.
I mean, next notification was you can watch Big Mama's House
for free on Pluto TV. That's out of a lot.
Big Mama's house slut. So this is like address to me,
but I think it's just for the podcast.
Jews want it. Open it.
Yeah, of course I do mate. Boxing videos.
(52:00):
This is a bit patron of this. No, we can't now.
If you want to see what's in the.
Box sign up to Patriot Baby got 2.
Oh, it's really one here now, no.
No, no, no. If you want to see, sign up to
Patriots. You've heard how skinned we are,
(52:21):
man. Yeah, yeah, £3 a month.
We get like 40P of that. Don't let us.
Don't let us go on the races again with no money.
We got 40P about it. Was 33, so I'm not winning, you
know? Lad, Honestly, yeah, sat Nick
Rocket, right? Yeah, that won two big trial
races, the Thaistys and the Bobby Joe, because he got his
(52:41):
son on it, Patrick. You know, it's just a dress to
me. Lad.
Yeah, because you got that Patrick Mullins on it.
Yeah, his son, he's technically an amateur jockey, so he's not
as like. That William Mullen's son.
Yeah, yeah, yeah. He's like an amateur jockey.
Technically. He's not got professional like
(53:02):
status. So when he's on a horse, because
William, because William Mullins, his main jockey, Paul
Town, and he's one of the best ever.
So the price differences are mental, really, because Paul's
house was. Just saying the odds are more
because he's an expensive jockey, but yeah.
It's not, it's not necessarily an experience, but you get, you
(53:24):
get shit, lad. But the but the odds are still
sick though, wouldn't it? But obviously.
But the odds has got good form. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
And it should never been fit foreach one.
You'll never get a Bobby Joel winner.
Yeah. Running in the Grand National.
Jeff but he's lost loads on that, I think.
So no, I, I don't know those people who had that.
Like, no. Don't matter.
(53:44):
So the Grand National, they always make one of the bookies
because they overround it to such a high percentage.
They'll no matter what wins. They'll they'll work out in a
way no matter what wins. They're all right.
They'll make profit on the on the race, you know.
Wish I was a bookie. Because it was 14 to one in the
morning and some bookies weren'tgoing best odds guaranteed.
(54:08):
So old people having like tenders on it but egg before you
get 33 on and I don't mate off you pop.
So it start at 14 to one in the morning it was 33 to 1 by.
By Yeah, just drifted out. Yeah, violent drifts happened in
the Grand National because it's such a big market.
(54:29):
So that that's, you know, that'shappened a couple of times.
It's not major, majorly shocking.
I was surprised it went off at 33 to one to be honest given its
form, but there you go. Some Aussies just get backed
throughout the day off free card.
Bragg just got levered in. A couple of others got like my
(54:52):
Maximus got well backed in that finished second so.
That's good to all start. Yeah, he's really good.
Also had a big weight this year.Was that one?
Did that been last year? Yeah, it was last year.
So because it won last year, he has he has to have more weight
on it this year. It's like level the playing
field and yeah, yeah. And I don't think an arse is one
(55:16):
of that kind of weight in quite a while now.
Yeah. I.
Have to put the weights on your horses.
They have little weights in the saddle.
I thought it just like giving chippies in there.
(55:36):
That's not talking about racing.So, Dan, did you watch the
National? No, What was I doing?
Oh, we were. We came home Saturday, didn't
we? So oh, yeah, yeah.
And then he. Was what did you do on your last
night? Nothing, to be honest.
Yeah, nothing. Because we had we had quite a
big Wednesday. So then Thursday would be
(55:57):
hungover, but it was like the sunniest day.
So we woke up early to like enjoy the weather and I was just
fucking yeah, I was. I've started going on the water
slides because the upward slideson the hotel complex and it was
just a fucking terrible idea, lad, because it was like ones
where you're in and you're goinglike that.
And I was just coming out and I was like.
What did you go over? Yeah, from the Wednesday like in
(56:19):
the is that was mad. It was called Bill Cosby's bar
which is mad in it like the still.
Wouldn't even rough. But like halfway through the
match, it just turned into like a nightclub and it was just
like, it was just mad, you know,watching the match and there's
like dance music on in the background and stuff.
Was just get busy like. No, not really.
(56:40):
That's why. Are you on your?
Place was lovely, Yeah, it was, but yeah, this.
Was so that makes you more pissed?
Yeah. That's what, that's what like
when you know, when I'll have a couple of bevies that use
whatever and it's just like, is he alright?
That's what it is. It's yeah.
Oh, that's what I think it is anyway.
But yeah, so I was just. I don't get pissed when I'm
Willow with me. I don't get I don't get I.
(57:04):
Don't get a hangover. I'll get pissed.
I'll get pissed, Yeah. It's because you've found scared
to show. Hey, the real you.
Maybe, yeah. She like that that.
Was my tool show it paid for this fucking holiday.
(57:26):
Yeah, so that's why you just like that.
Just nest. You just ain't going like.
Are you doing mocktails? Pretend it's.
Really. Oh.
Hello, I love a cocktail on holiday mate.
Heaviest fucking pina colada mate.
I just think everything tastes better on holiday, yeah.
(57:46):
Life's just better in it. Pina colada in the sun, bro.
What a drink, man. Pina colada by the pool mate.
I fucking love sitting by the pool mate.
Do you do you get in the pool orjust sit by the?
Pool I just sleep all of. You.
I just sleep. I like both.
Like by the pool or hotel route I just love.
(58:09):
I just rest. Joy for my holiday.
I'm on a piss up. Yeah.
First thing I do is jump in the pool.
It wakes you up. And when you get out, you're in
front of people you like. Force yourself out of an
hangover. Just crawl onto some lounger.
Pee in a colada bro. Get back on it.
You know, when she had the shitsat Florida, she was really ill.
(58:32):
She was over two or three days. It was the day Conference league
final. And oh, who was in the
Conference League final is it? When we're standing.
In it, No. We're the West Ham.
Yeah. Oh, Roma, Nah.
(58:54):
Our Europa League one of the finals anyway and I had this guy
all throughout the tournament fight shots on targets and
goals. He was smashing it in the
league. He was like 7 to 4 for a shot on
target. So I was levered it just
drinking pina coladas by the pill they had like the foot yard
and he got a shot inside gettinga fucking erupted someone like
(59:16):
£600. This all my.
Lot of upstairs. So I got fucking.
I just had all I mean I mean allday got up at 10.
I just kept on coming back everycouple of hours giving them some
water and like checking in on her.
She was like, I'm going to come down for.
Sure, I'm so sorry I'm ruining the holiday.
I went. This is my holiday.
(59:37):
No, you stay. Yeah, this is my holiday.
Oh, you rest. Yeah, rest.
You're watching a 40 old age gambling.
Pina coladas everywhere. Oh mate, it's fucking great day
that that's been a great catch up by me.
It's been refreshing, refreshingly honest about our
finances. Don't worry about us, science
(59:58):
patron, if you do worry about us. £3 a month.
You get 2 bonus episodes a week.And a live shows every Friday.
Well, including, oh, including that.
Oh yeah, yeah. And.
And also you get to see what's in in the in the presence.
The box, the box, Simpsons. And then by the way, don't I
(01:00:21):
look that nice today? Colour coordinated?
You actually are like. Barcode back baby.
Beep.
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