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July 21, 2025 62 mins

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Episode Transcript

Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
(00:00):
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Let's get into the episode. Let's pod put on your pod shoes

(01:34):
and dance the Blues. Let's pod, let's pod.
I'll just do that, but. When we stop doing the song,
we're just talking. Welcome back to the episode of
Hot Wall Screen with Podcast with the guys.
You know we are by now and returning guests, one of our

(01:56):
favourites, one of my favouritesin this city as well, Mr. Adam
Stort and everyone. Woo Hoo, thanks for.
Having me. Welcome back, Adam.
Cheers mate. How many?
Times Have you been on 1st? The third maybe?
We don't have many at Trick Balls offer.
No, because I definitely did onewhen you just were back in the
old place. Yeah, with the rat, remember?
Oh, the rat. Yeah, with the rats.
Oh, do you remember the the the the conditions we had to work

(02:19):
on? Yeah, when we had loads of rats
running around us and how they produce for us.
I'm only joking, Danny Daly. You're worth every penny, Danny.
Daly there some cheese? I'm in a bit of a I'm not in a
grouchy mood, but I just feel very like hackles very well,
very just like fucking divisionson the train and don't it's

(02:43):
stalkers. I just kind of saw what.
What's the worst kind of division on the train?
And parties piss women. Parties are pretty bad.
Piss women in general can't copewith them.
Yeah, yeah. I don't really change, but I
probably. Screeching and too defensive, do
you know what I mean? Have you ever seen it where
there's an annoying hen party though, and then like a really
annoying stag do you get on the same carriage and stuff like and

(03:05):
with and you'll get really sad and depressed though.
It's so limited to looking really such poetic justice.
Like crack on lads. Yeah, it's on a for me, Will.
Yeah. Maybe it's one go.
Yeah. Wait.
It's lovely. Yeah.
Hey. Lads sing some football songs.
I'll cheer everyone up. I hope there's some other
creeper lads who support the OP team you don't support.
That'd be fun as we're going through witness.

(03:27):
So how do you feel like that's today then?
Is it just because you've been rushed to here to work today?
Yeah, well, I got I got to the station with enough time, but
then there was someone who was was running around up across man
like it's causing mayhem. What do you mean?
I don't know if he was disabled or pissed or whatever, but he

(03:48):
was if he was fucking miles off it lad.
Was he just running around with stop, off, round up, across?
Was someone chasing him? I was just like shouting around
you're going to other people andthat he seemed a bit charged.
There's stuff like say like, what are you doing lad?
Put yourself. On no join these had a book join
join Daddy's had a book fast andhe's like be from Scotland.

(04:12):
That's what he was like. He was like, where's my butt is
that You're in a demon? Where's my butt is?
It's just. Coming from everyone.
You're OK mate, you. Feel like that's day?
Shall we pause and go and get a cuppa?
I had an anxiety dream that LiamGallagher pulled out of Oasis

(04:36):
because his voice went and I gotdrafted in to sing for him.
Why would he pick you? I don't know if that's what I
mean. I was like, but I was like, Nah,
I'm not. I'm not doing it.
Were you in the crowd and Noel was?
Like called that podcast follow.Yeah, Jamie, shut up, bud.

(04:58):
Have you ever, you know, he has the most detailed dreams I've
ever heard of. Do you have detailed dreams like
that? I don't.
Since I've been smoking weed, I don't.
Know my dream conversations and interviews in his dreams.
Joe one side a day off work I had a day off work so I've
dreamt a full 8 hour shift though I'm not doing that again
that's that's you've ever done that jump G shift she's.

(05:21):
That's. I can't come in today because
I've already been in it'll. Be Yeah, it was really, you
know. It happens up I.
Smashed my tights, by the way. Yeah, I've just got, I had to
get on. Maybe it's like some imposter
syndrome thing, psychology behind it, but I had to guide on
phones like was. It was it.

(05:41):
Was it at your date that you're going as well?
No. Was it eating pie?
Was it? Yeah.
So it's just loads of angry monks like a swarm of.
Wasps and they just do well or just die.
I was dying on my ass so I couldn't get my words out.
What was the first song you tried to sing?
Hello. I don't feel as if I know.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, you. Take up all my.

(06:04):
Time. Fuck off.
Where's Liam? Where's Tony?
Yeah, I'm getting Was I there? Pints throwing at me, Was I
there? Tony was there going.
Where's Tony? Where's Tony Keep?
Going. Where's his brother?
Called in sick as well so I can join my brother.
Yeah, so bad one anxiety. So you never remember dreams.

(06:25):
Never, never. Never remember anything else.
Even I can't remember the best dream you've ever had.
Best dream ever. I was when I was about 151415
and it, it was a detailed dream,but I've done a lot of partying
since then, right. So I think that's what is, I
think that's what is just me brains fucked.
And I basically robbed the bag and it was so detailed and I had

(06:49):
a lot of money. And in my dream I went to bed
and pulled under me pillow. All the money, all the money.
And I woke up and I was like that in bed.
I was like, I'm not going to buywith this stuff.
And then it just hit. Me.
Yeah, Yeah. No, no, no, no.
Lot of them. Yeah.

(07:10):
Oh wow. You did it recently, but it was
a food bank you robbed and there's still no beans.
You beanless cum you. Have your pillow full of beans.
Beanless cum What's the most you've had for your favorite?
Probably sex ones. Sex ones, yeah.
But I've really fancied someone and then I've I've heard sex

(07:32):
dreams. I could work, work colleagues.
Or something like that. Or just like someone off telly
or someone like that. Oh, telly.
Yeah, like, oh, I prefer. Carol Vorderman or something?
Yeah, someone like that. Yeah, yeah.
Forbidden fruit me. Use forbidden fruit.
Like an auntie or something. Oh, OK.
I thought you're going to say like other acts.
No clocks. No, no, they're kind of
forbidden. Oh, that's not forbidden, is it?

(07:53):
Well, it's in a way that's. That's illegal or he's not about
no, that's. Incest.
Married. Married in the family Incest.
Oh, married in. Oh yeah, yeah, you missed that.
Yeah, that's. The acceptable one, yeah, just
naturally assumed you meant yourrelative.
Widows and that. So yeah, sex dreams, yeah.
How do you wake up? Do you wake up when it's fucking
rock hard as? Well, no, I've never had a wet

(08:14):
dream, have you? Not no.
Have you woke up when it's fucking rock hard though?
Yeah, where it where it's like, oh, I need to like think about
something gross to like get thisto go away.
I just have a wank I. Don't wanna see that first
thing. Yeah, that's now.
It's like having a ciggy first thing in the morning.
It's like now I've gotta wake upa bit first.
I gotta wake up and immediately be what am I, an animal?
Yeah. Come on, I love the morning.

(08:34):
Rub me. All over your belly.
I've got the shower on his ass. All in the folds and that.
Yeah, you can't. Do that now.
Don't. I'm going to shower.
At 4:00 in the afternoon, I'm what?
Yeah. You can't do that now you
misses. It's my after bed.
What goes on there mate is my. Fucking.

(08:55):
Trouble. You wouldn't a fucking butt.
Blood once that divider goes down.
Between me and all the time. Let's go.
You have danger ones. Don't.
There's no danger, Lauren. I'm wanking.
Watch. You.
Can watch and I'll see. Yeah, I'll go have a go or watch
or join in if you want. That's the least favorite
option. Lauren, it's half three.

(09:17):
I'm assuming you're going to want to go for a vape, but if
not, feel free to watch this. I've been working on it all
week. You do something special with
your hands instead of wanking. That's a good Have you ever
wanced like that? Yeah, that's an interesting I.
Can't not. To not to completion.
I can't even do that. What the fuck?
I'm just a big puddle. Audible love.

(09:39):
You're gorgeous Tony, thank you.And your catasmatic, which makes
you even more handsome. Do you think so?
Yeah. Don't you think always for?
Bugs anyway. Charisma equals more handsome.
What do you think? I've got?
Charisma, yeah. You know what charisma is?
What is Charisma? I think it's like charm,
confidence, self belief, not really caring what people think
of you, saying what you want. That's charisma, I think.

(10:00):
Oh, thanks. But in like a charming way, you
know? Yeah.
Yeah, not an arrogant like. That's the opposite side of the
spectrum in it, yeah. Well, I do say I have the boys.
But you say the boy with tongue in cheek.
You know what? I mean tongue, family in cheek.
I'm a boy. Clip this.

(10:22):
I'm a boy. Can you send me that as a gift
for me? A sticker so I can send it to
people. I watch the boy sister as a kid
boy and the girl. I lick the mic.
The boy. Accidentally lick the mic.

(10:42):
And the day. Sounds of Italian.
Hello, you got me in the. You got it.
Yeah, you come. To me you come to me you say

(11:03):
you're the boy, you say you are the 1 you.
Fucking dance, father. Sounds like what film wouldn't

(11:24):
be improved if people talk like that And.
Get your flight. I want to see Sophie's Choice
with that character. Choose one.
Do I'm so I got all day. You've been decisive, bits.

(11:48):
Yeah, yeah, I think one of the films would be.
Rocky doesn't change at all. Rocky.
It's the bully. What?

(12:11):
Have you been up to then Adam this week?
It's my friend. No, just show, have you?
Finished writing the show. Yeah, it's been, it's not even
like, right, I'm writing the show.
I'm just putting my set in the audit in which it will go from
start to finish. You know what I mean?
But. That's post it notes, isn't it?
Yeah, and like. Yeah.
Don't be warned with like and then I can just move them around

(12:32):
and. I tried to do that.
I was trying to pretend that this is how you should do it.
I was like, what am I doing it? I'm not looking these posting
those ones. I've never wrote anything down,
really. Yeah, I'll just come back after
an hour show. Crazy though.
But then you chat, don't you? You chat to them.
No, this is just all, all stories, but it's just I, I
think, I think man and Jamie's shows are quite no obviously

(12:53):
totally opposite sport similar in the way they are because.
We're just too fat. Frauds basically and and a
factor, but no, they are funny too fair.
But we are fat frauds. We have fat frauds, but it would
somehow the end up there's no. Artistic merit at all but just
fat. Frauds.
Too much artistic meritage. Yeah, exactly.
I think the way it's quite similar is we never do the same
show twice. No, it's got to be.

(13:16):
So it's the story will get all different because we'll think
it's on while we're doing. Yeah, yeah, those are just an
hour of the the start and vault.Sorry, an hour of the goal.
Vault, I guess so just some other random shit that I'll
throw into, you know, fill a bitof time I think.
The best shows me yeah, because it's been signed test already.
It runs a naughty. You can see an hour of of good

(13:38):
shit. So so when, when these shows,
you can watch them now. Talking a dead relative.
No, I haven't got any. I'll.
Just make one up. I could, but then they'll die
and then I'll be I'll. Be fucking funny on it.
Out of your auntie start again. What do you mean?
Oh, I used to for me show anyway.
Did she leave anything to? Please.

(14:00):
Yeah, I can't do that. I even try out a dead relative.
I don't think I'd even write about it because I just don't
think I can make that funny. And if I don't think I can make
it funny, what's the point in saying it?
It's not. It's just so I can be like, oh,
how vulnerable I am. Look, guys, mainly single women
in the audience outlook how great I am, but also how
vulnerable I am. Sensitive, it just feels like.

(14:22):
That I make up an orphan to kill.
Thanks. Yeah, well, I did I.
Talked to an orphan and he died.I thought it's a funny thing of
me if you pretend if you drew like shit drawings and then put
them on your fridge and then when people were like one of
they, you were like, oh, that mesons at them.
He died. So I've left them there as like
a reminder of it. But you draw like something

(14:42):
really horrible, like a rabbit with a massive cock or something
like that, You know what I mean?Like reefing a table.
They're just like, oh, what's that?
Oh, my son drew it. Yeah, he died.
Can we plug your your show whilst we're on the topic now?
Just because the retention dropsoff as soon as you start going
right guys? So that's why he's here.

(15:04):
Well done, Danny. Thanks, Danny 20. 4th of July.
24th of July, a week from tomorrow. 10 of a ticket stand
out man stars me. Adam Store and then a few
friends. Thanks very much.
Oh yeah, and 24th, we'll be there.
We'd have a ticket for his birthday.
Nice. Yeah, me and Jamie coming to
watch you. Thank you, Danny.
Got off your fancy mate. 24th we've got, there's a live show,

(15:26):
isn't it? Oh, I'm not here.
I'm at the festival. It's a live show. 24th as well
isn't? It OH.
Yeah, yeah. Are you still in a live show?
Yeah, on the 24th. We have to watch you though
then. Yeah, so we normally do the the
Friday, but we've got a gig in Middlesbrough.
Both ears? Yeah.
Do you come as like a package thing?
A package thing. Not a double actor.

(15:46):
Tony just messaged me. He messages me and he goes, I
just see a poster basically, andI go, what have you done now?
What have you agreed to now? So he goes, yeah, can you get
Jamie down as well if you increase my fee?
No, I don't. You do, you do.
They say to me, they promoters message me and say hi, Tony,
you've so you've been doing a lot of good work at the moment.

(16:07):
Say thank you Sir. And then they say to me, we'd
really like to book you and I'd say, OK, it's fine.
They go. I'll wash your little Wong,
mate. I go.
I'll ask him and then I'll ask him and he goes.
Thank you so much, Tony, for thework.
Really appreciate it. And then I go back to the
promoter and say hi, promoter, pal.
And he goes, Oh, Tony, you've seen you just been smashing
again. Oh, thanks, mate.

(16:28):
Yeah. And then he then he goes.
I go. Jamie.
Jamie. Yeah, Jamie can do it.
Just give him £50 then he'll be happy.
And they go, yeah, and a tin of beans.
That's what it is now really. It's basically they want us,
they want us both together because sell loads tickets both,
then we're getting fucked. Shit fees, man.
But surely if it's just the two of us?
Now do you get out some bills? Don't be like before.

(16:49):
That's so different. We're on to it.
We're on. We're on to it, mate.
Yeah, we're not taking any more gigs.
That like dead fire away. Yeah, I just see posters, you
know what I mean? It's you, don't touch me.
I didn't. It's travel there though.
Yeah. I just got a lift.
Yeah, but like, you know what I mean?
So we got a lift with Skelly sometimes, yeah, but it's us
free in the front of a van. It's just so ridiculous.

(17:12):
It's just three fat cunts in thevan.
That's what people would think and they would be right in
thinking that. Yeah, yeah.
Yeah. And all, but it's, it's just I
just if you, if you're getting four or five hours away, I want
to get there. I'm just like, I'm just not
into, just not into. It Yeah, yeah, your.
Mind's gone. The drive's taken.
Yeah, you know, I'm not driving.It all sounds lazy.
Yeah, but it's been mine. I'm just.
Like I think being a passenger can be harder than being a

(17:33):
driver if it's a long journey. Thank you.
You've just got to fucking sit there and wait.
Give me a lift home the other day and I don't and I said what
my favorite car share ever was and it was with you.
It was with you and Pete Phillips.
And remember we did a gig back from Lincoln.
Yeah, Pete, your Pete Phillips and give me and start the lift

(17:54):
home. Drop me off 1st.
And we said nothing. I mean fucking nothing.
I don't even mean like I was allright gig one.
It was just we all did fine. There was no respect.
There's a bit of respect now andwe sat in fucking silence from
Lincoln. Like not even like they don't
need a piss, just straight through.

(18:14):
Yeah, your Phillips and Dump Blink fucking straight through,
lad. Lovely.
That pulled up. I pulled up and I got out and so
I went. You cost banded that lads.
So after it got done I can't talk.
I don't know if you remember it that well.
Why I think? About the silence.
I remember silence. I remember it so much.

(18:38):
Every every so often. I just thought, we've not spoke
in 45 minutes. And then I thought, like, no one
can speak now. It's all she figured it's gonna
break. But then the the balloon just
kept inflated when it went awkward and then down again.
Not awkward again. And then it went funny again.
It was weird without speaking. Without speaking, there was a

(19:00):
weird. Your sense that it was like,
yeah, it would be weird to speaknow and then 10 minutes later,
actually, this is fine. Another 10 minutes.
Oh, it's still. And he was all thinking the
same. Thing, We were all thinking the
same thing, yeah. So my blood.
I was trying to. Make fast to Lincoln 3 hours.
It's a while while exactly. You just speak a weird.
Not an A syllable was said. That's.

(19:21):
Silence. To make yourself fart at 1.0.
So. Because that was a bit of a
funny thing to do. It's so fart it was going off
for it. But I thought if I'd shit
yourself for us. It was just silent.
I need to stop and gather. No one said the way.
That one's just like that. Look it.
Stinks and there's no noise. That's so.

(19:42):
No one you went to Houston that oh never just goes that was.
Such a good car share. I think about that all the time.
I just like. To be fair though, I love time
journeys where it is. You don't have to fill the gaps,
you don't have to, you know, just a shit just talk.
Just shush man. Yeah, it's good when you.
It's when the comedians doing this, the bits on you.

(20:03):
Oh. God, no, I can't.
Do that. I can't.
I just don't. I just don't.
I start screaming until they stop.
Then they say, hey, what you think about this bit and then
spill off a 10 minute bit and you've got to keep going.
Every few cents, mate. I've seen someone die twice and.

(20:25):
You can't get that in the car I.Know in the green died in the
green room Swift in the green room.
So in phases what phase it out what?
And he was like, yeah, did he just thinking about in porn and
like, what do they do after theyfinished?
Like do they get a lift home? I mean, I mean Swift are like,
what that thinking I was watching porn before I was just

(20:47):
thinking like, no, it gives him a lift home.
I don't know. I was like, what?
Yeah, something that went on like watching watching porn
earlier. I was like, you know, having a
bit of a time. But then the dad in me comes in

(21:08):
like, oh, I hope that young girlgot home all right.
You have miles off of you. Just the what lads would be
enough for me to go with this bit as they go, but he.
Didn't present it as a bit source.
Yeah, he was. He made that like, yeah, but he

(21:31):
obviously did. Yeah, just thinking earlier
actually was it? Maybe he was hoping you'd chip
in with a little top of Oh, yeah, yeah, he'd do his job for
what's the worst, though? That way they're saying like
what you think about this bit orwhen they mention something, a
reference, and you're like, oh, I don't know what that is.
And they go, oh, OK. And they get the phone out and
show you the thing that they're talking about so that you

(21:53):
understand the reference in the bit they're about to fucking do
for you. Oh my God, never wanted.
To kill much happening in that bit bro yeah.
Too much so I have to watch thisthree minute fucking research
video on your phone when we're outside in the fucking so and so
I can hardly see it anyway and then you're going to show me
that and then I've got to remember it for your stop.

(22:14):
I don't want it. I don't want it and it's going
to get it must be you just must get it worse.
You just must get people who want to star comedy coming up to
use because they love the podcast They're.
Going I was outside here a few months ago and I was fucking
bladdered. Yeah, like off me face.
Yeah, that was where the whiskeybar was about to shut.
I'm going to sticky outside likethat.

(22:38):
This kid comes out to me, goes alright Sony.
Alright, alright mate, you went massive fan of the pod, I said.
Those things are fans like that not too.
Fat of the Pod, 2017, I said. That's the fan of the pod I'm.
The boy, I'm the boy, he said. A massive fan of the pod that

(22:58):
said thanks mate, he said. Can I have some advice?
Said yeah, of course mate. He said wanted to be a want to
be a comedian. I said don't do it lad.
And he just pens what I was justyour.
Voice. Yeah, I was.
Like fucking, I was like, I wanna get, I was just lit this

(23:18):
thingy up as well. I was like, ah, there's 5
minutes to see this. Yeah, yeah, fuck, you've got 5
minutes on here. That's the thing with vaping.
You could just now just. Go pulling, fuck off.
Throw this foot. It's like seconds.
Last sick. He was like, fucking no, I need
to smoke this. So yeah, he's he's a nice enough
kid that anybody he's just miles.
I'm saying like, how to do the answer, lad?
You ask a long person, like I hate comedy and I probably he

(23:41):
thinks I'm being like, I'm beingserious.
If you know, we were like, he just doesn't get it.
So he goes. I've done it before though.
So though, so those, yeah, but just keep gigging, just keep
going with your mic and fucking and you find your stuff and
yeah, go on lads, yeah, go away.And he went, yeah, I've done
this. I've done a gig for the these

(24:02):
comedians in the green room. So what he said done this gig,
he said, he said I wasn't on thebill, but I went in a green room
because I knew one of the comedians and I told the
comedians I want to be a comedian.
So they made me do a set of runsof them.
I was thinking, oh, they're ratsthere.
Yeah, that's funny. Yeah.
And then I thought, I don't slice.

(24:22):
So then the the the nice guy andme, I went, oh, yes, I will.
And then some advice or whatever.
And then and then I got too friendly with him and he went, I
have done another gig as well. Actually just remembered I was
like, what? And he went, it's on YouTube.
I went, oh, Sam. And he went, yeah, it's like the
gleam bearing or something. It was like a carousel comedy

(24:43):
character. No, I think it was a charity
like something. Oh, I bet he did.
Ultra comedy, of course. Yeah, maybe he was.
He then got YouTube on his phonelike 12 years and it said 7
minutes of the set and he pressed play and I had to watch
his set outside and then smoking.
And then also 'cause I felt bad on the kid that obviously like

(25:05):
these comedians, whoever got, I don't know, they are we've ever
got him a green room must have went, oh, this is funny.
This let's get him to sets. That's horrible.
I felt Allah. So I had to watch the set and
obviously the set wasn't, wasn'tthe best sport.
Yeah, I I just didn't. I just didn't laugh.
But I bet he has a better one there than he did in the green
room in front of seven sniggering comedians watching

(25:26):
them humiliate themselves. One of them, Nick in his one
good line, ruthless. Bastards. 100 of them comics.
Shouts out to Rob Thomas anyway.My God.

(25:48):
That's so much wow. It looks like a title car for an
oldie boxing match. You know, like.
What? On each side, yeah, but
hopefully that lads took my advice and hopefully he's he's
doing well for himself and. He realized you don't have to
perform in front of other comics.
Along with the green room. Yeah, it's a guy.
I mean, you will if you start inLondon.

(26:08):
Yeah. Jamie, man.
Do you know what must be worse? I don't know what would be worse
if you're starting out now, right as a comic and you've got
to do like drag shows and roast battles and stuff.
Great by. The way can I start again?
When we started and we had to dolike gong shows all the time
because they were the main thing.

(26:29):
So Dracon is better to start andback then and doing gong shows
or starting now and doing roastsand like ship shows?
And stuff like that. Like them roast battles?
You judge them, don't you? I judge.
I've done I've. Done.
I've never done one. I just don't get why you'd what
like why you want to go on stageto get to buy another one.
I just think it, I just think it's like, yeah, where the

(26:52):
comics look how we can take jokes, do what I mean, right?
When I choose, when I choose theone.
No, it was boss to watch it livefor other people.
Scared you, but I personally would do it.
Yeah, yeah, You know what I mean?
I'm like, I've got your own fat jokes.
Yeah, it seems like it is a thing for like newer comics to
do. But once you get to a certain
level, I mean, I'm not saying that you you get I.
Think, I think, I think now though, I think it's just I
think stage Sam, you know, there's not much stage time is

(27:14):
when we started though. Well, it comes and goes, wasn't
obviously, but I think at this moment in silence a few years, I
don't think as much stage time. I think that's why the choosings
do this, just to get on stage and.
'Cause otherwise you're doing anopen mic in front of five
people. Exactly.
Would you rather do that or a roast?
Bars. But you know what I mean, These
roast bars are quite popular. Aren't you getting like you get
80s on, you know what I mean? So.
I get why they're a thing, I getwhy people do it.

(27:35):
I'm the same though. I couldn't do it just because.
I don't. It doesn't help.
You don't want to be a community.
I wonder who's gonna win, me or the person who doesn't look like
me, you know? It's like they've got too much
fucking to work with. I've got I I did 1 and it was
with Connor Baynes. Joe Weirs.
Yeah, really Boss acts. But he's so fucking normal and
bland. He's got nothing to RIP him.
So like, he had a roast and he just destroyed me.

(27:57):
I didn't want to do that though,because we had to give each
other specific things about ourselves, right?
So we were meant to. Use to slide me.
I was just. Yeah, I suppose so.
I should have done really and said he was a fucking genocidal
Holocaust tonight. But I just at the time I was
like, Oh no, I'll do it properly.
And I just lost completely because he should have said he
made. Bullies or something, You know

(28:18):
what I mean? Yeah.
And I pulled them out and said, oh, you left.
These are mine last night. Oh man.
Maybe lifey. Hosts.
Maybe you should. Do roast on a Sunday.

(28:39):
I'd love someone to take too far.
They just get dropped though play.
With the typhoon, let me join inand Tony immediately drop me.
Go in the Rose battle. Yeah, well, you're, you're
you're so fat that your scales give a phone number.
Shut the fuck up. Bad bang in a bit.
You're you're so fat. I wouldn't say anything about

(29:02):
you. You're so fat every time you
step on a scale, says to be continued.
Oh, Jamie, I've been having a fucking poo every single day.
Yeah, every single day at half six in the morning.
What waking up to do I've. Been having a poo every single

(29:22):
day at half 6 this morning in the morning.
That happens as you get older, you know, you start to shit at a
register. Mad dogs haven't been getting
out of bed since Quarter 7. Shut up.
I just wanted our mates. It's not a best ever do this

(29:43):
shit joke too, you know? It's so funny you lost that joke
study. I want to do a dad joke.
Yeah, I just want to wear a dad joke.
Yeah. Alright.
So it's a woman, right? She's given birth.
She's in hospital and given birth, right?
But she's unconscious during thebath, right?

(30:03):
And she wakes up afterwards. She's like, doctor, doctor.
And she's like, oh, you're OK. And she's like, yeah, yeah,
yeah. What about my, my kids?
What happens is she's like, oh, congratulations, mate.
Let's say Johnson, Mrs. Johnson,you've given birth, and you've
given birth to 222 children. You've got two children.
She's like, oh, my God, that's amazing.
Where are they? He's like, oh, well, they're in
the other room. Unfortunately, your husband
wasn't able to get here in time,but your brother has.

(30:25):
So your brother's name's your babies for you.
And she goes, Oh, no, Doctor, you're joking.
My brother's an idiot. He's like, he's the laughing
stock of the whole family. He's got to give them stupid
names. What have you done to my family?
And the doctor goes, OK, calm down, calm down.
It's OK. Listen, you've had a girl and a
boy, OK? And he's called the girl Denise.
And she goes, oh, actually, that's not bad.
OK, Well, what's what's what's he called?

(30:47):
The boy? And the doctor says the nephew.
Your turn. He's an Englishman, An Irishman.
An Englishman was a Welshman, there was an Englishman, a

(31:11):
Scottish man, a Welshman, an Irishman in a pub and all our
kids on the same, not on the same day, but it was all pretty
new dads. The Englishman goes.
I watched Carl yours and the Englishman went, Well Mama's
born on Saint George's Day, so Icalled him George.
And he says to the Welsh guy, what do you call yours?

(31:31):
Well, funny enough, mine was on Saint David's Day.
They called him David. Like the Scottish guy was like,
Oh my God, very fortunate, you know, she was C-section St.
Saint Andrew's Day. So I called him Andrew and the
Irish woman went. Same thing with my son Pancake.

(32:00):
Oh, that was really good. It's a Mike Greed joke.
Mike Greed's got some bangers. What's?
This on YouTube. Have you seen Mike Reed special?
Yeah, with all the EastEnders question in the crowd.
Yeah, well, he's gonna. Bring him on in a stretcher like
he's passed out and he wakes up and he's got all the nurses.
He's. Got he's like fat in hell
because it's all like mother-in-law stuff and it's

(32:20):
obviously got a bit of a bad Rep.
It's a bit dated like, but the way he tells a joke, some of
them they like hooks in this story.
Like what? Do you call a dog with no tank
like scraffy? Bollocks?
So like that fuck. You know, I go around like my
read all that's like going on fucking nails, yeah.
Yeah, he's like when you do impressions of those old type of
comics. It's him.

(32:41):
They've got a great. But he's great.
They've got great patter. Yeah, yeah.
Yeah, it might be special sick. That's what I remember.
I have to watch that baby. Yeah.
So have you have you you were from something.
Are you full time? I've.
Got a part time? Job.
Yeah, Yeah. Well, it's just.
I work in a cafe in an art gallery.
Oh, that's very nice. Yeah, and the Walker?
Oh, do you? Oh, it's nice down there.

(33:03):
Art gallery. I love art.
Listen. Actually, what?
Yeah. Have you got any art?
No, I haven't got an OSHA. When you get a house, are you
going to decorate it? Like probably nice.
Are you going to decorate it with?
What's up with you? I just want to show you my
potato. Oh nice, I've brought mine as
well if you want to see it. We all got our potatoes, yeah.

(33:23):
Well Danny, I've got 2 spuds in my undies.
What? Are they doing there?
What? They get all clammy with you?
You meant your balls, didn't you?
You're a dirty boy. I'm so I'm getting that.
You cooked, don't you? Yeah.
Yeah. So I'm like, new to the game.
Look at them for jacket. Look at them for jacket spuds.

(33:45):
What the fuck are they? What?
Look how crispy they are on the outside.
Are they not the crispy on the outside in the middle?
The beards, aren't they? But I'm sure they're lovely on
the inside. Chilli and sour cream.
I'd love that was banging potatomeat.
Nice, that's not coconut, is it?Is that you got to prick it to

(34:06):
get the steam out. Put salt, seeds, oil and salt on
it. I'm here, fry it.
I'll put it in the oven. You have a proper old school
bro. Yeah, it was a fucking banging
crisp on the outside. Do you have a?
Stabber fork in it and put that in the oven as well, because the
oven will heat up the fork and then the fork will heat up the
potato because it's inside it. You know what I mean?

(34:31):
This is the first spud I've evercooked.
Oh, OK, that's a good goal. For your second spuds, try that
leave. The fork in.
The yeah, yeah, stab the fork into the potato, put the whole
thing in the oven with the fork because the metal of the fork
will heat up quicker, and then because it's inside the spuds,
that'll heat up the potato quicker.
Oh shit. You know it's crispy raw.
Yeah, because you do. Like don't you do like metal

(34:52):
like rods that you can put in spuds for that?
Probably, but it's like same sort of match and.
You've probably already got a fork, yes, you'd have to buy
that thing, wouldn't you? I've got some metal straws
milkshakes. There you go, that'll do.
Got mint straws me. Don't fuck those turtles Breath.
We'll have a paper straw. Have you got plastic ones?
I've got metal ones. Oh yeah, I'm still saving the

(35:14):
turtles. Yeah, yeah, that's one thing
I'll spend money on straws saving.
Turtles. I'd do the good straw.
You just have milk chicks that often you need the good.
I don't. I don't.
I have them once every four or five months.
But when I have fun, I want a fucking one.
Sprinkles and that. You're like a big.

(35:35):
Kid that you shouldn't. What?
I made a potato today. I thought so.
Hard to he was Hazel. You couldn't make one.
I couldn't make a potato. No, you couldn't.
Why couldn't? You couldn't.
You just couldn't. Why couldn't?
You couldn't? You got the wrong sports.
You wouldn't know what you're doing the wrong.
You won't season it. Did you get a sweet potato?
I wouldn't. I'd get fucking King Eddie's

(35:56):
please. So I've won already.
Oh, you're miles off it, lad. King Eddie's.
Potato. I just don't know why.
You just never have to fight lads.
Lads, you just chat shit lads. I just don't know why you never.
I am happy for you when you're making out, you're some big
fucking chef and. I'm just trying to just trying
to improve yourself. No trying to improve yourself.

(36:17):
Why don't you just get yourself out your comfort zone and try
and make a better dish? I'm trying.
I've got to start somewhere. I've never cooked before.
Ever. I've cooked a few things before.
What's your second dish going tobe?
I do a nice eggs dish. Egg dish?
Babushka. Oh.
Moroccan egg something Moroccan eggs thing called.
Oh, baklava. No sushuka tomatoes, baked eggs

(36:41):
and tomatoes basically, but withbits in and that.
Bits in? What are the bits?
Like Parsley in that. What's What kind of stuff do you
cook? I've.
Poached eggs, it's good. I'm alright to poached eggs, but
I can't do a whole meal and theneat the whole meal at once.
I have to do like each bin individually and then eat that
bit and then make the next bit. Oh, right, because I'm at the

(37:02):
stage now with foods, whatever, see too much food on a place,
it's a bit overwhelming. I don't know if I've got like
some kind of fucking eating disorder, but I can't have
maybe. But instead of having like, you
know, bigger chips and veg, I'lldo the bigger and the chips 1st
and eat them and then I'll do the veg and eat that.
You know what I mean? Oh you it is bad.
Like you'll cook it all? No, I used to cook it.
One bit at a time. I used to.

(37:22):
I yeah, I used to. I know what you mean.
It sounds. So yeah, eat the bacon chips and
go. I can't be asked the broccoli.
No, I have to have some veg but I can't eat it if it's on the
plate with the bigger and the chips it's too much at that
point. I'll end up leaving SO.
I used to do that with. I didn't wait.
I didn't wait to finish to cook it, but I used to eat everything

(37:43):
like a certain order, like chipsfirst, burger last.
Oh, yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Like with roast dinners. Well, now that a lot with them.
Yeah, yeah. What's what you first?
The roasted potatoes probably first.
Now I'd leave them till last, would you?
Yeah, because they're the nicestbit.
I know when they go colder shit.I don't mind them when they're
cold, I don't mind cold food. I think that might be a eating

(38:04):
disorder thing as well, but I just sometimes.
As your eggs fall off when you have roasted and then because
there's lots going on all, there's no different because
it's like. It's only if it's like there's
loads of it because then it's just like I don't even want to
start eating this because I knowI'm going to get like 2
mouthfuls in and there should belike, you know, I don't know.
Who else have we got on the show?
By the way, Adam, have you said before to friends?
Oh, I don't know. Yeah.

(38:25):
Oh. Because The thing is I don't
want people coming on and being like, hey, is him doing a bit.
I want him to do a thing with me, interact in some way.
I don't want to want to just come on and do a bit and get
off. You know what?
I. Mean should me and Pete Phillips
and come on and just say something for 10 minutes?
Well, you'll be joining in with the fucking audience, so yeah.
Pete slightly in front of us too.

(38:46):
Pretending to every now and thenjust yeah, every now and then.
That'll be great. What was the feedback, Adam?
Can you yawn a bit more, please,Pete?
So are you going to? Get people on to do stuff with
you. Yeah, yeah.
If I can think of something, I don't know, it might be that
maybe I'll just do an hour of all my shit, you know than I've

(39:06):
ever thought of. Maybe we could mean you could
try and put our heads up our legs over our heads on stage.
And the face to do it wins. Yeah, yeah, right.
It'd have to be sort of more difficult for me though, because
it's hard for you to get your legs up, but it's that's easy
for me. So we have to pick something
that's hard for me to do but easy for you to do, and then see
you can do it first. We could have a hot dog eating
contest. I just have to eat a full meal

(39:30):
and you just have to get your legs up.
I'm there with a roast dinner and you're like, yes.
That's the latest. That's the latest it was.
Easy last time. That's the latest Internet
debate. In it, Who'd win in a race out
of Joey Chestnut and Usain Bolt is the IS.
Joey Chestnut. It's like the best eater of all

(39:50):
time. Like ridiculous.
Like fast eater. Yeah, it's like, and he's so far
above the next person. He's like so dominant in this
field. He asked you have to eat a hot
dog first. He can eat a hot dog in less
than a second, about a second probably, and then do 100
meters. Who would win that race?

(40:11):
So both of them are. There, both of them start with a
hot dog, Yeah. And then whether it's hot dog
can Sprint, Sprint. Oh.
Usain Bolt wins. I think Chestnut wins do.
You think he's just inhaling that hot?
Dog, is he a fat console? No, he's on.
He's unreal lad. Can you Google how fast Joey
Chestnut? Can no?
Is he a fat condo? Like what?

(40:32):
No, no, he's in shape. He's in shape.
Yeah, yeah, yeah. He'd probably do 100 meters in
like 22 seconds, but I don't think Bolt would.
You say Bolt would he's he's hotdog in 5 seconds.
I don't know, do you want? I think Chestnut would win that.
With the bone area catching bone.
I want to see him have a hot dogeating contest.
How many hot dogs can you eat? Like?

(40:54):
And then you get to like 50 and then you have to do the run.
I see you throws up first like. That at the I've.
Seen them? Have you seen them contest
though? I got into a bit of a food
eating rabbit hole a few years ago and it knocked me sick.
Put my food for a bit. Why?
Just the way it's because it's competitive eating, so they just

(41:16):
don't get in water and. Oh yeah, yeah, just I've been
watching that be Beard and the way he just like he was doing
his breaking challenge. Yeah, and like the most human of
beings, he's a couple. Of.
His hands are gonna scoop to open as well.
I was just like, oh God. Have you seen that famous Cliff
of the guy where he voms and like 3 hot dogs fly out of his

(41:37):
mouth but then he catches all three of them and just shoves
them and then the guy watching behind sees it and throws off?
I I once sneezed a chip being sick.
Out your. Nose.
Yeah. Full chip.
Wow. That's fucked up.
Throwing up enough chip fart me nose.
I'd say that to Jeeta. Imagine.
It'd been there for years and suddenly all this clarity that

(41:59):
you've never. I used to inhale food.
I used to eat so fast, like ridiculously fast.
Like soon as he'd be gone, I'd like like people who are way
bigger than me would still be two bites and I'd be gone.
And when you were sick, do. You think it's just because I've
not chewed? I've not chewed.
I just went through your fuckingcousin being.

(42:21):
Maybe like your mouth's full so you just start.
Putting foods up your nose so. Fast.
I just need to get it into me face somehow and then it's.
Chips in the years you've come through, whose nose?
They are connected. Like, yeah, they are connected,
yeah. The throat and the nose.
So I've been been out eating. They've been like, hey, still
got salt on here. That's not salt, boy.

(42:43):
This is a salt. It's 2.5 seconds it takes for
him to eat 1 hot dog. His record is 76.
Yeah, 70. Six in a minute, but it.
Doesn't say it doesn't say how long that is, but yeah, So 2 1/2
seconds, it's, oh, 10 minutes. It takes 76 in 10 minutes.
Wow. Dogs.

(43:04):
Oh, that's crazy. I want a hot dog so much right
now. I really want a hot dog.
In 2.5 seconds it takes to eat 1.
I want to see how many hot dogs Bonnie Blue can fit in a vagina.
I think that'll be a good one. Not the ball. 1718190 She's
crying. Never mind.
With the butt on as well. Oh yeah, OK.

(43:25):
Oh, just dog. No dog.
It'd be easier to slip the bonnet be it'll mush up at the
entrance to a vagina. Then you just get a load of
fucking mold. Steep.
Out of a nose. You should sneeze and a hot dog
will come out of a nose. Do you think that like, society
is getting worse because of like, how like porn and only
fans and how easy it is to just see naked people?

(43:47):
I think fair play to a man. Do you?
Yeah. Yeah.
Do you think society is getting worse?
And yeah, 100% because people would expect like everyone's
like body conscious and everyone's like.
People all yeah but in the nightis it was supermodels on it and
there's. Yeah, I think I'm less ages.
Atkins diet and stuff. Yeah, keto or stuff like that,

(44:08):
have you? Seen that open house on Channel
4. So it's basically like I think I
mentioned that ages go to. But anyway, it's like this open
experiment like. Oh, are they all fuck.
Yeah, so couples go on and like we've had this fantasy of blah,
blah, blah, and half of them go on there and it's the lad like
basically wanting to be a coho. He's got to do this fancy of
doing this and that and he gets in there and shits himself, but

(44:29):
it's just because he's basicallywatched it on porn.
Then gone. Yeah, I want me bared to do
that. Got there, flap this.
She's loved it. And then he's gone on crying.
Yeah, I'd have a lot of cops. They're just addicted to porn
and they just like watching it so much that they just like, oh,
I must like my wife shagging someone else.
But actually, they just like watching.
Porn. But I don't get if you'd watch
cook porn. Surely you're watching it from
the perspective of I'd love to fuck a guy's wife, Yeah?

(44:52):
Rather than yeah, oh, I told youit's meant like fucking people
making food, Paul. Cock porn.
Cock porn. Chef Porn chef.
Yes, chef. Harder Chef.
It's raw. My cock.
Is fucking raw I. Was like.

(45:19):
What the fuck chef hats on them?Yes, Chef.
There'd be a thing on that though, very masculine, you
know, testosterone filled man. I wouldn't mind seeing that in
the kitchen. I've asked.
The bare back. The bare back.
That's what the pawn could be called.

(45:41):
You're the bear. Oh, the bear back.
Yeah, it's OK. Too much.
The bear back and then in brackets you know the bear.
I love one of those that what's 4 series of that?

(46:06):
Cook porn is going to be like I I like I can kind of understand
people who are into like piss and you know, it's like a
control thing and I kind of get people who are into like feet
because they're the shape of them.
But people who are into being cooked, I don't think I won't.
Ever understand the foot? The foot thing is a red the feet

(46:26):
gene. The feet niceness gene is
directly next to the pleasure valve.
Oh, in your brain? Yeah, right.
So feet and pleasure often overlap.
Amen. OK.
What do you mean the? Pleasure valve the.
Pleasure Valve. The thing that gives you.
Sometimes it overflows. There's something that gives you
something with feet that is right next to pleasure.

(46:48):
So feet and pleasure often get overlapped.
That's why there's so much feet so much.
And it's also, conversely, why alot of people are very sensitive
to feet being touched as well. Because it's like being tickled,
almost. Yeah, so some people.
Some people hate them. If anyone comes in with Milo, my
mum's feet, she'll fucking hit you.

(47:09):
Yeah, yeah, yeah. If your mum's asleep.
I mean, my brother used to play like, you know, what's up?
What's the time, Mr. Wolf? But used to like get closest to
you could get closest to mum's foot without waking up like
Buckaroo. Who's your son?
Golf. I'm the boy.
Booka do Booka do it's. Not it's not.

(47:31):
Sexual though. OK, she's not, I don't know with
you. So just like.
Oh, just like you're messing about me.
Like, oh, let's see, you can touch one's foot.
Would you? Would your fingers though?
Yeah, yeah. Yeah, all fingers, no thumbs.
Right round, two cocks out. Yeah, called Coward.

(47:52):
Come on your pussy, scared to touch your mum's foot with your
cock? I think you was born.
He scrapes it off your mouse foot, I.
Think it's kind of, you know, the question about the society
question. I think that's going to affect
relationships then, yeah. I think so.
I think if you're in a relationship now, you should do

(48:13):
everything you can to say. Society, Society ever been good
because I always think that with, you know, when someone
goes worst Prime Minister in my lifetime, that's happened to
every Prime Minister that's everbeen in power.
Sure, it's impossible for us to have a good Prime Minister now,
but do you think in. Victorian times.
Oh, do you think? Just like just ruining all these
women showing ankles? Do you know what I mean?
Yeah, I don't. There's never been a perfect

(48:34):
sound. There's never been.
But we've been less aware of what a shit time it was back
then because we didn't have phones and stuff like that.
So I think a lot of us were ignorantly blissful of the fact
that, you know, there's shit going on that we wouldn't like,
you know, but now we're, we're so fucking aware of how shit
everything is. That's why it blows people
depressed though as well, yeah. It's because everyone's
depressed. Yeah.
Everyone's tired and hot and depressed.

(48:55):
Yeah, plus I mean, this is my conspiracy theory.
Nice. I think everyone who goes to get
diagnosed, the doctor just goes,yeah, you've got it.
And just shut up. Drop me.
Got me face. Yeah.
So if I went there, basically I've got an eating disorder.

(49:19):
Yeah, but not the other way, theopposite way you'd say?
Yeah. No, I mean, we're like, you
know, that's mental health and all that's in the bin.
Anxiety and. Yeah, you've got anxiety here.
You've got some fucking pills. Hardy bows in a bit.
Hardy bows. Yeah, some Hardy bows in a pill
packet. Yeah, that's the egg.
Why it? Just made-up because.

(49:39):
NHS are overwhelming contacts. You're overwhelmed with
appointments, so they're not going to arrive.
We'll see you in six weeks, thenwe'll see you again.
We'll see you again. We'll just go.
Yeah, you've got that. You're so special.
You're mad. Yeah, but.
It's costing. It's going to cost more money
though, isn't? It, yeah, it's not his money, is
it? He just wants to fucking get
through his dinner, lad. Also, maybe they're on, you
know, like waste salesman have quotas.

(50:00):
Maybe they have a quota for like, I've got a, you know,
diagnose a certain number of patients with the mental health
problems. So they often give them all
these pills. It's like the police as well, if
you know them pigs. Big Pharma.
Big pharma baby. Do you know, like them pigs
around Christmas time when they've got to go out and give
it? Get tickets for the the
Christmas parties you fucking pigs.
Yeah, 31 in a 20 zone, my foot. Oh, don't say foot.

(50:24):
Not Jamie's mum's foot. Not.
Jamie's mum's foot. That is true though I went into,
so this is years ago, I was having a bad time.
So I went into the doctor and was like I think I've got
depression because I'm not right.
And he was like all right, fine,so I'm going to put you on some
pills. I was like I'd rather not be on
pills. Is there another?

(50:44):
Can you put me in counselling orsomething?
And he was like, well, I can't but it's going to be 6 months so
you're going to be better just going on these for now if you
want so. And it's like.
What are you already just walkedin there so that don't feel
right. Yeah, basically.
A doctor. I've hit the elbow.
I. Went.
That's what I mean I went in with cart ribs is how I can
really fuck depression pills fucking.

(51:06):
You just looked at you Jesus name you need.
These you need some of these fucks you.
You're fucked. You imagine your doctor saying
that. Fucks you, aren't you?
Looking at your screen, not evenlooking at you.
You're fucks you, aren't you? I said that now to say how much
a drunk a week. You're not paying for it.

(51:33):
That's my pleasure, Valve. She likes to sing.
Don't you love them? No, not really.
Like to party? Like to party?
Like to party? Huh.
You like to dance? You're so talented.
I'm falling into this couch. She's like, I'm gonna lie.
It's. Like get into the I want to see

(51:55):
there we go. That's better.
I want to see how this. Works Tony's bare cooking Me.
Yeah. Drink my bottle?
Yeah. Do I?
Yeah. I mean, we are going to have a
bit of a late 1 today because we've got to do a Patreon as

(52:16):
well and it's nearly 7:00, so nice.
What time? May as well tuck into a beer.
What? Patreon time.
Patreon time. Just got questions sent in, bye.
Yeah, yeah. That's what.
You answer them. Should we do one now?
Let's. Do 1 now.
Yeah, hey, a a Patreon. By the way, if you don't know
what that is, team.com/hot Waters Agreement podcast come
and join up Free part of the month.

(52:37):
You get earlier access to episodes like this, you get
bonus episodes and you get a live show every week.
Guess how much for free part of the week?
I mean a month. That's about the but only where
I'm from. Where do you live in that Wigan?
So I love the smell of Joe like a beer.

(53:00):
You're called the mats on the bar when that gets spilled in
beer, man. I love stale ale.
Oh my God, stale ale's my favorite smell.
A little bit. Do you like in?
You like? The working men's company, it's
just all in the car, the. Old pubs fully got knocked down
with the carpet floors and overtime pints have been
spilled. People have been spattered.

(53:20):
People have been fucked. People have and.
All that smell, that stale ale, you walk in.
That's right, hot summer's day, and you walk past the boozer.
When you're a kid, that was Algyman, that smell, you go.
You can't. Wait to grow up and be an alchy.
It's fucking grace. They got me.
Dad's in there right now, yeah. What's some of?
The stopping a waitresses. I'm selling bacon.

(53:41):
Let's go. What's some of your favorite
smells? I really like wet pavement
smell. That's a nice one.
Hey, I like that. Quite like wet pavement.
What a bad gas. Petrol, gas markers, stuff like
that. That's always good.
Glue is quite nice. Marker is a good one.
A permanent marker. Just, you know, when you've
like, you just need a little. It's like doing a little bump

(54:02):
like panties. Well, love the smell of panties.
Pant. Worn panties.
Warm panties. I thought you've watched your
sense of smell. Now, no.
Well, I have poor. It was rejuvenated by warm
panties, yeah. Yeah, three years of adult
smell. Three years because of COVID.
And all ours for industry. Hereditary.
So you like your mum and dad? My.

(54:24):
Dad lost the smell of 30, I lost1 of 30 so.
That's insane, how did you just lose it overnight?
Sweats. I can't believe that.
So you'll never smell stale ale again.
That what happens is I get you get a little sense from here and
there and stuff like that comes and goes, but like very, very,
very, very weak. Shame on taste.
Like oh God smell. I can't imagine tasting but not

(54:44):
being able to smell as well. It's not, it's not the best
thing, you know what I mean, but.
It's a miss. Bad smells, but yeah.
Well, also, yeah, you could go down on someone.
It doesn't matter how long she'snot washed for, you're not
going. To notice, Yeah, what else is a
good thing? You have no smell.
You could drive past that Bay that you go before you get to

(55:05):
Runcorn that smells like fertilizer.
Yeah, or the dock roll with the beer and tires.
Dock Road, the beer and tires, Yeah.
Beer and tires. Nice.
Oh, no, you missed that. Yeah.
Beer and rubber. I don't like that.
Tell you what's? A good smell catalogues.
Yeah, that's amazing. I got catalog.
Wow. That noise, what did you do?

(55:35):
It was. It's all sexy news.
He looked at me like I was in danger.
That's why it. Was a you only give me predator
eyes. There was a sharp National Rd.
called your scoops at the targetshop.
Like for diff kids. Yeah, that always smell
Immaculate because no one drank in there.

(55:56):
I yeah, I don't smells. I hate that.
Should we go into the hospitals?OK, Oh, we're talking about the.
Mate, Well it sends me under. Yeah.
I get that I have I I have like I'm visit some family members,
not because I can't go on it. It's just sends them under the
smell of it just like. I'll tell you what's the worst
smell. Open spots.
They. Fucking stink.

(56:17):
Smell the fear on them. You fucking hum you.
You've never had a first to you boy you.
Stink of Gong shows you. Your little Sunday act.
Another one I don't like is. Perfume when there's too much of
it, you know what I mean? And it gets in the back of your
throat when you walk past. That winds me up.

(56:37):
I hate lynx Africa me. You think Africa?
Smells Africa on well. Really, I don't like that.
I don't like like the Lynx Africans and all that.
Was in that Christmas box breath?
What about you, Danny? What?
What do you like the smell of? I don't like.
Chocolate, chocolate, chocolate I.

(57:00):
Love the smell of money I. Wake up with a nice smell of a
Meadow. My favorite smells money give.
Me a little Meadow silver. Smell.
I like the. Smell of a fresh Meadow and.
I sound especially 7 year old boys on these.
In a Meadow, Chase is a boy froma Meadow, and he trips up.

(57:21):
His undies fall over. And then I fall over me.
Now this goes up his ass. I insert myself into his anus
and all over the fresh Meadow like no.
I wear him like a hat. It's.
Like the no. I don't like tuna.
No, if that. I do like chlorine.
Oh, chlorine's a heavy smell. Chlorine really sickle.

(57:42):
Like no, but it's a right amount.
It smells heavy. Oh, you like that?
Oh, my eyes, Yeah. I don't like it in the eyes, but
you know when you go in the batsand it hits you, that's a that's
a good time. I used to love the chippy in the
bats. What a chippy in the bats.
Where was this? Lad swear that.
A chippy in the bat. In my local bat, yeah.

(58:03):
When I grew up, Peter Lloyd's used to have less a chip, a chip
counter thing. Just do cones and chips.
Wow, that's clever. But yeah, and it would just be
like, I swear down pizza Lloyd. Anyone?
Anyone knows it'll know. I get I finished this.
Moment that's that's just thing you remember when I was younger
and you go with the bats. I was just I'm usually go in the
bats and you just go with the chip and you get.
The Golden. Chips, just the smell of that,

(58:25):
the bats and then the. Chips.
Yeah, yeah. Ketchup on the on the air corn.
Chips. Then you come out being like,
oh, a good swim that I've earnedthese, Yeah.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, 'cause you're always, you have to swim in
that, yeah. I like changing ham sea book
crisps after swimming. You've changed that.
A good hat. Seabrook crisps.
Yeah. Cheapest.

(58:45):
Foot. Yeah, cheapest they they drink
cold cut ones, aren't they? You're having a fucking free
course meal that you fucking Peter Lloyd.
Jim shut up. That we swam in puddles.
So let's have a one risk patron question and we'll bounce.

(59:06):
So this one keep we've mentionedthis be earlier, so it's fit
nicely. Jamie probably won't really be
able to answer so but. What you're wow, what is it?
A Scouse thing? Hey, what's your favorite white
sock? Battering a wall?
What's your favorite reason to batter a wall?
Know what it is? What?
Cough what is it? What's your favorite ciggy of

(59:29):
the day? This guy says she can't beat the
first one. You've got to apologise to
Liverpool this. Is that what you mean?
And our socks. Apologise to our socks.
Favorite thing of the day, you do smoke as well.
Yeah, my favorite thing of the day is after Meaty.

(59:53):
Really. Yeah.
Yeah, that's mine. Yeah, yeah.
This guy's hit hole. After sex, one's not to be good,
isn't it? It's that just a?
Well, it's been a while. You sad just fucking fucking me.
Handled it like the singing and they go oh.
Is it good for you hands? Well, I have to ejaculate.
That's great. Thanks.

(01:00:13):
Do you want some ciggy? Oh, OK.
Well you can't have any you stupid bitch.
What have I fucking told you? Not paying you to smoke.
Jemma took you over hand. Yeah, what I'm doing.
And you like that, right? It's well better than you.
You can't even draw either. You're pathetic.
You can't even draw. Yeah.

(01:00:33):
I won't even put my fucking forkin you.
I won't put me fork in you. Come here.
You could. You could paint it like
different colours and pretend that you're experimenting.

(01:00:55):
You know what I mean? You know what I mean, You know?
What I mean, you know. What I mean, I just like mine.
I like mine. I think my my favorite thing of
anything is the second second beer, second key, second bet.

(01:01:18):
Second beer is a thing, isn't it?
Because the first one goes too quick?
Because you're just like, but then the second one you'd enjoy
properly? That's a savoury.
Yeah, no, not everything. Your face, like your face line
is the best. Yeah.
Yeah, yeah. No, your first line of Coke's
the best because you just have it and you're like, whoa, you're
like chasing you basically chasing that first line for the

(01:01:39):
rest of the night. Well, the rest of your life.
That's your life. First one, first one ever.
I had St. John's car park 2007.
Fuck me. Why did I drive home quick the
world with. HD.
Yeah, and you can't. You're not a hire.
And I've been on Freeview ever since.
Wow, wow. Well, that was sort of a

(01:02:02):
fantastic episode with our friends.
Thank you very much also as wellremember the. 2058 Don't forget
to watch my one man so stand out.
Nine starts next week and startsat 10 o'clock. 10:00 Hot water
back.com with Mark Club bye. Yep.

(01:02:22):
Bye everyone. Think positive what you.
Doing that for a lot you've. Set me off the hill lads.
Wow.
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