June 9, 2025 • 28 mins
Welcome to another heart-expanding episode of the Inspirations for Your Life Podcast! I’m your host, John C. Morley — serial entrepreneur, engineer, and passionate communicator. Today, we’re diving into something fundamental, something deeply human — connection. In a world increasingly filled with noise, distraction, and division, the ability to truly connect with others isn’t just a nice-to-have; it’s essential to our well-being, our growth, and our society. In this episode, we’ll explore the transformative power of connection — not just as a social skill, but as a force that shapes everything from mental health to innovation. Get ready to discover why connection matters now more than ever, and how you can cultivate it intentionally in your everyday life. Let’s begin. 🤝💡1️⃣ Human beings are wired for connectionWe are biologically and emotionally designed to connect. From the moment we’re born, our survival depends on bonding with others — it’s not just psychological; it’s neurological. Studies in neuroscience show that the same brain centers involved in physical pain are activated when we experience social rejection. Connection isn’t a luxury — it’s a hardwired human need. Without it, we wither; with it, we thrive.2️⃣ Connection boosts emotional and physical well-beingConnection doesn’t just make us feel better emotionally — it literally makes us healthier. Strong social ties have been linked to lower blood pressure, reduced inflammation, better immune responses, and longer life expectancy. Emotionally, connected people experience less anxiety and depression. That hug from a friend, or the meaningful talk with a loved one? It’s medicine — real, healing medicine.3️⃣ Social bonds reduce loneliness and isolationIn today’s hyper-connected digital age, loneliness remains one of the most silent epidemics. But social bonds — deep, meaningful ones — are the antidote. They give us a sense of belonging and remind us that we are not alone in this vast world. When we nurture our bonds, we help heal the invisible wounds of isolation in both ourselves and others.4️⃣ Meaningful relationships build trust and safetyIt’s not about how many friends you have — it’s about the quality of those relationships. Trust doesn’t form overnight; it’s built through vulnerability, consistency, and care. Meaningful connections create psychological safety, which gives us the courage to be ourselves, speak our truth, and grow into our fullest potential.5️⃣ Technology’s role in enhancing or hindering connectionTechnology is a double-edged sword. It has the power to unite across distances — think Zoom reunions, Facetime calls, online communities — but it can also create a false sense of closeness. Passive scrolling and superficial engagement often replace deep, meaningful conversations. It’s up to us to use tech intentionally, not habitually.6️⃣ Active listening as a key to deeper connectionReal connection starts when we truly listen — not to respond, but to understand. Active listening means being fully present, putting away distractions, and giving someone your undivided attention. It’s a powerful act of love and respect, and it communicates, “You matter. I hear you.” This alone can build bridges across emotional distances.7️⃣ Vulnerability strengthens connectionLet’s get real — the deepest connections are born in the moments we let our guard down. Vulnerability invites authenticity, and authenticity breeds trust. When we stop trying to be perfect and start being real, we allow others to do the same. That shared space of openness becomes a fertile ground for lasting connection.8️⃣ Connection fosters collaboration and innovationConnection isn’t just emotional — it’s strategic. In workplaces and creative environments, strong interpersonal bonds spark better collaboration, faster problem-solving, and richer innovation. When people feel connected, they communicate more effectively, take more creative risks, and elevate group outcomes far beyond what any one per
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
(00:18):
Well, hey guys, it is John C.
Morley here, serial entrepreneur, streaming to you live
from Montclair State University.
Great to be with everyone.
If you are new here, well, welcome to
Inspirations For Your Life.
I'm so glad that you decided to join
me.
And if you're coming back, well, it's always
great to have my old friends coming back
(00:38):
to join me to catch up on some
new knowledge.
All right, guys, our master topic for the
week, as you know, is how connection, purpose
and peace transform our world.
We are in a great subtopic here for
today.
And that's the importance of human connection.
Series four, show 24, episode three.
(00:59):
Hey, by the way, whether you're at a
university like I am or you're home and
maybe you're a little bit hungry or thirsty,
head on out to the kitchen and get
something scrumptious, delicious, warm, hot, cold, healthy, sweet,
tart or not.
And come on back.
All right.
Don't forget to check out BelieveMeAchieved.com for,
(01:19):
of course, more of my amazing, inspiring creations.
So without any further ado, I'm going to
kick this show off.
OK, well, welcome, everyone, to another heart expanding
episode of the Inspirations for Your Life podcast.
I am your host, John Seymour, serial entrepreneur,
engineer, passionate communicator, podcast coach as well, video
(01:40):
producer and much more.
Today, I'm diving into something fundamental, something remarkably
deep, a human connection in a world increasingly
filled with noise, distraction and unfortunately, division.
The ability to truly connect with others isn't
(02:01):
just a nice to have thing.
It's essential to our well-being, our growth
and our society.
In this episode, I'm going to explore the
transformative power of connection, not just a social
skill, but as a force that can shape
everything from mental health to innovation all around
(02:22):
you.
So get ready, everyone.
Yes, get ready to discover why connection matters
now more than ever and how you can
cultivate it intentionally in everyday life.
Let's begin.
Sit back and enjoy that beverage or that
snack.
And let's get to some great action here
with good content.
(02:42):
Well, number one is human beings are wired.
Yes.
No pun intended.
We have a lot of wires around here.
Much of you guys saw lots of wires
here, actually.
No pun.
Yes.
More wires here.
See more wires.
So there are wires here for a TV
that I'm in this in a room here.
So yes, human beings, as I was saying,
(03:02):
are wired for connection.
We are biologically and emotionally designed to connect
from the moment we're born.
Our survival depends on bonding with others.
It's not just psychological.
It's neurological.
Studies in neuroscience show that the same brain
centers involved in physical pain are activated when
(03:23):
we experience social rejection.
Connection isn't a luxury, folks.
It's a hardwired human need.
Without it, we wither.
With it, we thrive.
So sometimes maybe you're feeling sad and you're
wondering what's going on.
You say, gee, I don't need people.
Well, you might be saying yourself that you
don't need people.
But I have to be truthful to you.
You actually need people.
(03:43):
We all need connection.
We all need, you know, the personalities in
our lives.
And I think as we understand the importance
of humans, which is what the show is
about and the connection, we can really start
to appreciate, OK, how our brain operates and
how we want to do things to avoid
(04:07):
pain and gain pleasure, hopefully more to gain
pleasure.
And I think when you realize that, as
I said, connection isn't a luxury.
It's a hardwired thing that humans need every
day.
All right, guys.
Number two, connection, it boosts emotional and physical
(04:28):
well-being.
Connection doesn't just make us feel better emotionally.
It is literally something that makes us healthier.
Strong social ties have been linked to lower
blood pressure, reduced inflammation, better immune responses and
longer life expectancy.
Emotionally connected people experience less anxiety and depression.
(04:49):
That hug from a friend or the meaningful
talk with a loved one.
It's medicine, real healing medicine, not the kind
you get with a prescription.
Even better, because when our endorphins fire, we
appreciate that.
And it causes us to be in a
(05:11):
very unique way in alignment with the universe.
And I think that's something that a lot
of people actually miss, is that when we
are at the level in alignment with something
that actually attracts into our life.
I think that's really, really important.
Number three, social bonds reduce loneliness and isolation.
(05:35):
That's true, guys.
In today's hyperconnected digital age, loneliness remains one
of the most silent epidemics.
But social bonds, deep, meaningful ones are the
antidote for that.
And they give us a sense of belonging
and remind us that we are not alone
in this vast world.
(05:56):
When we nurture our bonds, we help heal
the invisible wounds of isolation in both ourselves
and others.
But I think some people don't realize it.
They don't realize how much power that we
have because our thoughts create things.
Our thoughts bring things into reality.
(06:18):
Whether we want them in reality or not,
they get into our reality because of what?
Because of how we're connecting, how we're aligning.
Number four, guys, meaningful relationships build trust and
safety.
It's not about how many friends you have.
(06:40):
It's about the quality of those people and
the relationships that are in your life.
Trust doesn't form overnight.
It's built through vulnerability, consistency, and care.
Meaningful connections create psychological safety, which in turn
gives us the courage to be ourselves, speak
our truth, and grow into our fullest potential.
(07:01):
But many people just think, well, you know,
if I can't get that friend in five
seconds or I can't get that friend overnight,
then I don't want that friend.
Well, guys, that's the wrong kind of friend.
You want somebody who's going to be around
you through thick and thin.
We've also heard the term many times that,
you know, you can always tell your good
(07:22):
friends, right?
Because your good friends will be around when
you're in trouble, when you have challenges.
Not just when things are peachy keen and
everything is going well.
A friend's there to help you through it,
right?
Because he or she knows that you'd be
there for them as well.
I think that's a very important thing.
Number five, guys, technology's role in enhancing or
(07:45):
hindering our connections.
Technology is a double-edged sword, right?
It's the power to unite across distances, like
Zoom and let's say you've got a lot
of them, like even Teams and there are
many others.
Think there's Jeans, FaceTime calls and many online
(08:09):
communities, but it can also create a false
sense of closeness.
Passive scrolling and superficial engagement, you know, like
when you're on the phone, you're like, oh
my gosh, I didn't get the like.
I didn't get that like.
I didn't get the like.
Oh my gosh, what am I going to
do?
I didn't get that like, right?
And you're feeling so bad because you didn't
get it.
Passive scrolling, as I said, in the superficial
engagement, it often replaces the deep, meaningful conversations
(08:33):
that we need in our lives.
The personal touch, right?
The personal connection.
It's up to us to use tech intentionally,
not habitually.
What does that mean in English?
So technology, guys, is not good.
Technology is not bad.
I said this before.
Weapons are not good.
Weapons are not bad.
(08:53):
But what they are is a tool.
And how we choose to use them, folks,
that's what makes the miracle of life.
That's what makes us become a great version
of ourselves.
But too many people get discouraged because it's
not happening on their time.
They want it now, but because it didn't
(09:13):
happen, well, then I don't ever want it
to happen.
And that's just people getting impatient.
And that can happen for a lot of
reasons.
But the question you might be asking, John,
is why are people so impatient?
I think it's because they want something to
happen, but then for whatever reason, they just
don't, like, they just don't really do what's
(09:37):
needed.
Does that make sense?
And so when we approach things with true
thought, with true meaning, other people can tell
that we've approached it in that kind of
a manner.
Now, I know that sounds kind of wacky,
but that's the truth, folks.
(09:59):
People can see us, like, looking through a
window.
I was at an event this past weekend,
and not to place any judgment on anybody,
but I could just tell from the vibe
in the room that people were superficial.
I could tell that they were not looking
to get into a connection.
(10:21):
They were not looking to build friendships.
And when one person shared their, let's say,
skills or their great traits, other people kind
of were, like, shutting down.
They weren't paying attention to it.
I think that's a problem.
I know myself, when I was sharing something
I was proud of, not boasting, but just
sharing it, there was one person in the
(10:44):
room that told me I talked too much,
and I hadn't said much at all.
And then I learned something.
I learned why he said that.
He said that because that was him basically
trying to satisfy his feeling of being, let's
say, not enough.
(11:05):
He told me that he quit his job
and that now he's doing something else part
-time, but then he does something else because
he wasn't ready to retire.
So in one sense, he was jealous for
what I was doing.
I wasn't boasting.
I was just being proud of what I
did.
And because it made him feel, let's say,
(11:30):
less of or not enough, he decided to
challenge that by saying, hey, you know, John,
you talk so much, but I'm going to
get a word in here, too.
And he said two sentences, and then he
walked away.
People like that are trying to prove something,
not to you and I, but to themselves.
I feel bad for those people.
Number six, active listening is a key to
(11:52):
deeper connection.
Real connection, folks, starts when we truly listen,
not to respond, but to understand.
Active listening means being fully present, putting away
distractions, giving someone your undivided attention, you know,
like having your iPhone and making sure that
your iPhone is on D&D when you're
(12:13):
out somewhere, right?
So you're not disturbing the person you're with.
That's important, being fully present, right?
It's a powerful act of love and respect,
whether it's a platonic or non-platonic connection
that you're having.
And it communicates, you matter to me.
I hear you right now.
(12:34):
And this phone, well, I can always, you
know, check that phone later on my social
media or whatever.
You're important right now.
You're here.
You're important.
You matter.
I hear you.
This alone, folks, can build amazing, powerful bridges
across emotional distances.
(12:56):
Because a lot of people in this world
say they care, but then they're on their
phone like this.
You're like, oh, yeah, I think you're great.
Yeah, you're really good at what you're doing.
I mean, this is terrible.
That's nonsense.
That's nonsense.
Number seven, vulnerability strengthens connection.
(13:17):
All right.
So, again, whether it's platonic or non-platonic,
let's get real for a moment, people.
The deepest connections are born in the moments
we let our guard down.
Vulnerability invites authenticity, and authenticity breeds trust.
When we stop trying to be perfect and
(13:37):
start being real, who we are at our
true core, we allow others to do the
same.
That shared space of openness becomes, well, a
fertile ground for a lasting connection.
And you're not doing it with any kind
of agenda.
You're doing it because that's the core you.
So many people I know do it because
(13:58):
they're looking to get something.
Number eight, connection fosters collaboration and innovation.
That's powerful.
Connection isn't just emotional, folks.
It's strategic.
In workplaces and creative environments, strong interpersonal bonds
spark better collaboration, faster problem solving, and richer
(14:22):
innovation.
When people feel connected, they communicate more effectively,
take more creative risks, and elevate group outcomes
far beyond what any one person could ever
do alone.
And I think that's something that many people
don't want to realize is that we're great
alone, but when we're in a team, we're
(14:42):
even more powerful, more creative.
Number nine, disconnections.
Used to say the phrase, disconnections are us.
Disconnections impact us on a mental health level.
When we disconnect, whether by choice or by
some circumstances around us, our mental health suffers
(15:04):
immediately.
Prolonged isolation can lead to depression, anxiety, a
diminished sense of self-worth, and if it
gets very bad, even suicide.
Disconnection doesn't just hurt emotionally.
It deteriorates our ability to feel motivated from
(15:25):
within inside, focused and hopeful.
And when we lose hope, it's like, why
even bother, right?
Why even bother?
That's important.
Recognizing the signs and rebuilding connection can be
the lifeline to getting you back on track
(15:45):
and maybe even saving someone or your life.
Number five, number 10, building intentional connections in
daily life.
Intentional connection is about making the effort, reaching
out, checking in, making eye contact, remembering a
name, sending a voice note instead of a
(16:06):
like.
These small choices compound over time and create
a meaningful network of support and care.
Make connection a daily ritual, not an afterthought.
Why do you want to connect with somebody?
Because you just want to build a friendship.
Is there anything wrong with that?
So many people I know say they want
(16:26):
to build a friendship, but they're out for
something.
They know you can do something for them.
So that's why they want this friendship.
That's why they want this connection or this
union.
They know there's something you have and they
want it.
And that's terrible.
So intentional connection, it's about making the effort
(16:47):
first, right?
Make the connection a daily ritual, not an
afterthought.
And when you truly do that from your
heart, other people are going to see it
like, wow, this guy's pretty amazing.
Number 11, the role of community and personal
growth.
Communities, whether physical or digital, will shape us
(17:08):
daily.
They offer support, accountability, and a mirror to
our growth.
Surrounding yourself with people who inspire challenge and
uplift helps you to evolve faster and with
more joy and passion.
A strong community, folks, becomes your ecosystem for
(17:28):
thriving.
You might say, John, I'm living fine.
Yeah, and a lot of people are living
just fine.
But wouldn't you rather thrive?
Life is so much better when we learn
how to embrace it, hold by the wheel,
and enjoy that excitement.
Number 12, our last point for today.
Connection is a foundation for a better society.
(17:51):
If we want to fix what's broken in
our world, the division, the polarization, the loneliness,
we must begin by reconnecting with each other.
Connection fosters empathy, and empathy inspires action.
A more connected society is a more compassionate
one, where understanding replaces judgment, and collaboration replaces
(18:13):
competition.
Remember, we've talked about this before.
We have empathy, and we have compassion.
Most strangers will demonstrate empathy just to be
polite.
You know, they'll kind of put themselves in
your shoes.
But they won't really risk themselves to take
a step to help you, or get you
to take a step to help you.
(18:33):
They just are strangers, and they're just people
like, they just don't want to get like
that involved.
So they stay on the compassionate front, because
they can show you that they have some
sympathy for you and understand.
But they're not looking to really get you
to change, and they're not looking to get
themselves to help you to change.
So that's the real important thing.
And I think these are very important lessons,
(18:55):
actually points.
What I want to do now, I should
say, I'm rushing the gun here, is I
want to do what I do after the
middle of the show here, and I do
something pretty cool.
I'm going to give you some personal stories
and lessons, basically one for each point.
(19:18):
And my reason for doing this is that
I hope it will solidify.
It will get you to take maybe something
that's abstract, and bring it into the real
world.
Now, that sounds like something that's kind of
crazy, but I got news for you guys.
When you embrace that whole spirit, your life
can change on a dime.
(19:40):
Don't believe me?
Just try it.
So again, I've got some great examples here
that I want to share with you.
And again, the reason that I'm doing this
is, I want you guys to see that
it's not just about talk.
These are things that have happened in my
own life.
And so when we start to appreciate these
things, and we're able to give, let's say,
(20:04):
a meaning to something, because now we understand
the situation, that's priceless.
And those are the kinds of things that
I will say will be empowering, because it's
going to bring you and those around you
to an entirely different level, operating on a
different frequency.
All right, number one, humans, beings are wired
(20:25):
for connection.
When I was a kid, I remember getting
lost at a carnival for a few minutes.
It was overwhelming, colors, crowds, and noise.
But what I remember most wasn't the fear.
It was the relief and the warmth of
seeing my mom's face when we found each
other again.
That hug felt like a life raft.
Even as adults, we never outgrow the need
(20:48):
to feel seen, held, and safe in someone's
presence.
This moment reminded me that connection isn't optional.
It's our DNA.
It's not a weakness to need others.
It's the sense of being human.
And I think we need to start embracing
that.
(21:10):
My second lesson, connection boosts emotional and physical
well-being.
Back in 2018, I was working nonstop, sleeping
less than four hours a night, and rarely
seeing friends.
I thought I was being productive.
But my, let's say, energy kind of tanked,
(21:31):
getting some headaches here and there, weakened immune
system, and emotional burnout.
A mentor told me to start spending time
with people who filled my cup.
I began weekly taking lunch walks with a
friend.
And within a few weeks, I felt alive
again.
That personal change proved to me that connection
(21:52):
is like oxygen.
Take a good breath.
Let out some carbon dioxide.
Invisible, but necessary to survive and thrive, right?
Just like I took that breath.
Take that great breath of oxygen and let
out carbon dioxide.
That is the magic.
(22:14):
Number three, social bonds reduce loneliness.
During the pandemic, many of us felt, shall
we say, the sting of isolation.
But for me, it was the sudden silence
after years of in-person events and client
meetings.
I started hosting short online check-ins with
friends, just 20 minutes once a week.
(22:34):
That little commitment kept loneliness at bay and
reminded me that even virtual bonds carry power.
Maybe not as much as the personal ones,
in-person ones, but virtual still do have
some power.
Sometimes the solution to isolation isn't a huge
change, but a small, steady act of reaching
out.
Number four, meaningful relationships build trust and safety.
(22:59):
A few years ago, I was part of
a business mastermind group.
At first, it felt competitive and guarded, like
many groups do.
But over time, as we began to share
our struggles and not just our wins, something
shifted.
We laughed, got vulnerable, and supported each other
through real challenges.
That group became a safe harbor.
(23:21):
I learned that trust doesn't come from perfection,
but from people showing up honestly and consistently.
Number five, technology's role in enhancing or hindering
connection.
I once messaged a friend, happy birthday, on
social media and thought I had done my
part.
(23:41):
Later, I found out they were going through
a tough time and that message had felt
impersonal.
That moment changed me.
Now I make it a point to call
or send a voice message for meaningful moments.
Tech can enhance connection if used with intention,
but it can also make us lazy if
(24:03):
we rely on it to end and replace
that genuine feeling in care, which so many
of us love to give often.
We should keep doing that.
Number six, active listing is a key for
a deeper connection.
At a networking event, I met someone who
shared a story about a personal loss.
(24:24):
I listened intently, really listened, and I didn't
offer advice or solutions.
Months later, that person reached out and said,
hey, John, you were the only one who
made me feel heard.
That stuck with me for years.
In a world full of people waiting to
speak, the rarest gift is your full, committed,
(24:45):
undivided attention.
But so many people want their voice to
be heard.
That's important.
Just listening can make somebody feel so valued.
And it doesn't cost you a penny.
Number seven, vulnerability strengthens connection.
(25:07):
I once gave a keynote speech and for
the first time shared a failure story, one
I had been ashamed of.
Afterward, a man approached me with tears in
his eyes and said, John, thank you for
sharing.
I thought I was the only one who
went through something like that.
That day, I realized vulnerability isn't weakness.
(25:28):
It's the bridge to connection.
We don't connect over our perfection.
We connect over our humanity.
Let me say that again.
We don't connect over our perfection.
We connect over our humanity.
We don't connect over perfection.
We connect over our humanity.
Number eight, connection fosters collaboration and, of course,
(25:50):
innovation.
When I worked on a team project a
while back, we were stuck creatively until we
paused to simply talk.
And get to know one another.
That human bond unlocks something magical, new ideas,
and deeper trust.
The best innovation doesn't come from isolated geniuses,
but from collaborative, connected minds.
(26:13):
The more connected the team, the more powerful
the outcome.
Number nine, disconnection's impact on mental health.
I remember speaking with a client who seemed
off.
He later admitted he hadn't spoken to anyone,
truly spoken, in weeks.
He was spiraling into depression.
(26:33):
We started weekly 15-minute phone calls, just
having someone to check in with him and
something to help him anchor his life.
Disconnection can be silent and deadly.
It can often lead to suicide or death.
But the solution is within reach.
A voice, a call, a video chat, a
(26:56):
simple, how are you?
Now, not something, like, rote, but something that
is gonna be truly from the heart.
Number 10, building intentional connections in daily life.
There's a local barista I used to see
every morning.
I started making a point to greet him
by his name and ask him how his
day was.
Over time, we became friends.
(27:18):
It wasn't forced, just consistent, intentional kindness.
Relationships don't require grand gestures.
They grow through the small, repeated actions and
acts that we take daily.
Because you know what that is?
You matter.
Number 11, the role of community and personal
growth.
When I started a mastermind community a while
back, I thought I was creating it for
(27:39):
others.
But I ended up growing the most.
I found accountability, encouragement, and mirrors who helped
me see blind spots.
Community is a mirror and a ladder.
It helps you see yourself and rise way
beyond your limits.
Surround yourself with great people who call you
higher.
(28:00):
Number 17, connection as a foundation.
I once volunteered a local soup kitchen.
At first, I thought I was there to
serve food.
But as I sat and listened to the
guests, I realized I was there to connect.
Those conversations were so powerful.
One man told me, what I miss most
isn't money.
It's people looking me in the eye.
Connection can heal, but policies can't.
(28:20):
It starts one conversation at a time.
What are you waiting for, guys?
Start making your connection and letting people feel
valued and loved in this world.
I'm John C.
Morley, serial entrepreneur.
Check out BelieveMeAchieve.com.
I'll catch you real soon, everyone.
Well, hey guys, it is John C.
Morley here, serial entrepreneur, streaming to you live
from Montclair State University.
Great to be with everyone.
If you are new here, well, welcome to
Inspirations For Your Life.
I'm so glad that you decided to join
me.
And if you're coming back, well, it's always
great to have my old friends coming back
(00:38):
to join me to catch up on some
new knowledge.
All right, guys, our master topic for the
week, as you know, is how connection, purpose
and peace transform our world.
We are in a great subtopic here for
today.
And that's the importance of human connection.
Series four, show 24, episode three.
(00:59):
Hey, by the way, whether you're at a
university like I am or you're home and
maybe you're a little bit hungry or thirsty,
head on out to the kitchen and get
something scrumptious, delicious, warm, hot, cold, healthy, sweet,
tart or not.
And come on back.
All right.
Don't forget to check out BelieveMeAchieved.com for,
(01:19):
of course, more of my amazing, inspiring creations.
So without any further ado, I'm going to
kick this show off.
OK, well, welcome, everyone, to another heart expanding
episode of the Inspirations for Your Life podcast.
I am your host, John Seymour, serial entrepreneur,
engineer, passionate communicator, podcast coach as well, video
(01:40):
producer and much more.
Today, I'm diving into something fundamental, something remarkably
deep, a human connection in a world increasingly
filled with noise, distraction and unfortunately, division.
The ability to truly connect with others isn't
(02:01):
just a nice to have thing.
It's essential to our well-being, our growth
and our society.
In this episode, I'm going to explore the
transformative power of connection, not just a social
skill, but as a force that can shape
everything from mental health to innovation all around
(02:22):
you.
So get ready, everyone.
Yes, get ready to discover why connection matters
now more than ever and how you can
cultivate it intentionally in everyday life.
Let's begin.
Sit back and enjoy that beverage or that
snack.
And let's get to some great action here
with good content.
(02:42):
Well, number one is human beings are wired.
Yes.
No pun intended.
We have a lot of wires around here.
Much of you guys saw lots of wires
here, actually.
No pun.
Yes.
More wires here.
See more wires.
So there are wires here for a TV
that I'm in this in a room here.
So yes, human beings, as I was saying,
(03:02):
are wired for connection.
We are biologically and emotionally designed to connect
from the moment we're born.
Our survival depends on bonding with others.
It's not just psychological.
It's neurological.
Studies in neuroscience show that the same brain
centers involved in physical pain are activated when
(03:23):
we experience social rejection.
Connection isn't a luxury, folks.
It's a hardwired human need.
Without it, we wither.
With it, we thrive.
So sometimes maybe you're feeling sad and you're
wondering what's going on.
You say, gee, I don't need people.
Well, you might be saying yourself that you
don't need people.
But I have to be truthful to you.
You actually need people.
(03:43):
We all need connection.
We all need, you know, the personalities in
our lives.
And I think as we understand the importance
of humans, which is what the show is
about and the connection, we can really start
to appreciate, OK, how our brain operates and
how we want to do things to avoid
(04:07):
pain and gain pleasure, hopefully more to gain
pleasure.
And I think when you realize that, as
I said, connection isn't a luxury.
It's a hardwired thing that humans need every
day.
All right, guys.
Number two, connection, it boosts emotional and physical
(04:28):
well-being.
Connection doesn't just make us feel better emotionally.
It is literally something that makes us healthier.
Strong social ties have been linked to lower
blood pressure, reduced inflammation, better immune responses and
longer life expectancy.
Emotionally connected people experience less anxiety and depression.
(04:49):
That hug from a friend or the meaningful
talk with a loved one.
It's medicine, real healing medicine, not the kind
you get with a prescription.
Even better, because when our endorphins fire, we
appreciate that.
And it causes us to be in a
(05:11):
very unique way in alignment with the universe.
And I think that's something that a lot
of people actually miss, is that when we
are at the level in alignment with something
that actually attracts into our life.
I think that's really, really important.
Number three, social bonds reduce loneliness and isolation.
(05:35):
That's true, guys.
In today's hyperconnected digital age, loneliness remains one
of the most silent epidemics.
But social bonds, deep, meaningful ones are the
antidote for that.
And they give us a sense of belonging
and remind us that we are not alone
in this vast world.
(05:56):
When we nurture our bonds, we help heal
the invisible wounds of isolation in both ourselves
and others.
But I think some people don't realize it.
They don't realize how much power that we
have because our thoughts create things.
Our thoughts bring things into reality.
(06:18):
Whether we want them in reality or not,
they get into our reality because of what?
Because of how we're connecting, how we're aligning.
Number four, guys, meaningful relationships build trust and
safety.
It's not about how many friends you have.
(06:40):
It's about the quality of those people and
the relationships that are in your life.
Trust doesn't form overnight.
It's built through vulnerability, consistency, and care.
Meaningful connections create psychological safety, which in turn
gives us the courage to be ourselves, speak
our truth, and grow into our fullest potential.
(07:01):
But many people just think, well, you know,
if I can't get that friend in five
seconds or I can't get that friend overnight,
then I don't want that friend.
Well, guys, that's the wrong kind of friend.
You want somebody who's going to be around
you through thick and thin.
We've also heard the term many times that,
you know, you can always tell your good
(07:22):
friends, right?
Because your good friends will be around when
you're in trouble, when you have challenges.
Not just when things are peachy keen and
everything is going well.
A friend's there to help you through it,
right?
Because he or she knows that you'd be
there for them as well.
I think that's a very important thing.
Number five, guys, technology's role in enhancing or
(07:45):
hindering our connections.
Technology is a double-edged sword, right?
It's the power to unite across distances, like
Zoom and let's say you've got a lot
of them, like even Teams and there are
many others.
Think there's Jeans, FaceTime calls and many online
(08:09):
communities, but it can also create a false
sense of closeness.
Passive scrolling and superficial engagement, you know, like
when you're on the phone, you're like, oh
my gosh, I didn't get the like.
I didn't get that like.
I didn't get the like.
Oh my gosh, what am I going to
do?
I didn't get that like, right?
And you're feeling so bad because you didn't
get it.
Passive scrolling, as I said, in the superficial
engagement, it often replaces the deep, meaningful conversations
(08:33):
that we need in our lives.
The personal touch, right?
The personal connection.
It's up to us to use tech intentionally,
not habitually.
What does that mean in English?
So technology, guys, is not good.
Technology is not bad.
I said this before.
Weapons are not good.
Weapons are not bad.
(08:53):
But what they are is a tool.
And how we choose to use them, folks,
that's what makes the miracle of life.
That's what makes us become a great version
of ourselves.
But too many people get discouraged because it's
not happening on their time.
They want it now, but because it didn't
(09:13):
happen, well, then I don't ever want it
to happen.
And that's just people getting impatient.
And that can happen for a lot of
reasons.
But the question you might be asking, John,
is why are people so impatient?
I think it's because they want something to
happen, but then for whatever reason, they just
don't, like, they just don't really do what's
(09:37):
needed.
Does that make sense?
And so when we approach things with true
thought, with true meaning, other people can tell
that we've approached it in that kind of
a manner.
Now, I know that sounds kind of wacky,
but that's the truth, folks.
(09:59):
People can see us, like, looking through a
window.
I was at an event this past weekend,
and not to place any judgment on anybody,
but I could just tell from the vibe
in the room that people were superficial.
I could tell that they were not looking
to get into a connection.
(10:21):
They were not looking to build friendships.
And when one person shared their, let's say,
skills or their great traits, other people kind
of were, like, shutting down.
They weren't paying attention to it.
I think that's a problem.
I know myself, when I was sharing something
I was proud of, not boasting, but just
sharing it, there was one person in the
(10:44):
room that told me I talked too much,
and I hadn't said much at all.
And then I learned something.
I learned why he said that.
He said that because that was him basically
trying to satisfy his feeling of being, let's
say, not enough.
(11:05):
He told me that he quit his job
and that now he's doing something else part
-time, but then he does something else because
he wasn't ready to retire.
So in one sense, he was jealous for
what I was doing.
I wasn't boasting.
I was just being proud of what I
did.
And because it made him feel, let's say,
(11:30):
less of or not enough, he decided to
challenge that by saying, hey, you know, John,
you talk so much, but I'm going to
get a word in here, too.
And he said two sentences, and then he
walked away.
People like that are trying to prove something,
not to you and I, but to themselves.
I feel bad for those people.
Number six, active listening is a key to
(11:52):
deeper connection.
Real connection, folks, starts when we truly listen,
not to respond, but to understand.
Active listening means being fully present, putting away
distractions, giving someone your undivided attention, you know,
like having your iPhone and making sure that
your iPhone is on D&D when you're
(12:13):
out somewhere, right?
So you're not disturbing the person you're with.
That's important, being fully present, right?
It's a powerful act of love and respect,
whether it's a platonic or non-platonic connection
that you're having.
And it communicates, you matter to me.
I hear you right now.
(12:34):
And this phone, well, I can always, you
know, check that phone later on my social
media or whatever.
You're important right now.
You're here.
You're important.
You matter.
I hear you.
This alone, folks, can build amazing, powerful bridges
across emotional distances.
(12:56):
Because a lot of people in this world
say they care, but then they're on their
phone like this.
You're like, oh, yeah, I think you're great.
Yeah, you're really good at what you're doing.
I mean, this is terrible.
That's nonsense.
That's nonsense.
Number seven, vulnerability strengthens connection.
(13:17):
All right.
So, again, whether it's platonic or non-platonic,
let's get real for a moment, people.
The deepest connections are born in the moments
we let our guard down.
Vulnerability invites authenticity, and authenticity breeds trust.
When we stop trying to be perfect and
(13:37):
start being real, who we are at our
true core, we allow others to do the
same.
That shared space of openness becomes, well, a
fertile ground for a lasting connection.
And you're not doing it with any kind
of agenda.
You're doing it because that's the core you.
So many people I know do it because
(13:58):
they're looking to get something.
Number eight, connection fosters collaboration and innovation.
That's powerful.
Connection isn't just emotional, folks.
It's strategic.
In workplaces and creative environments, strong interpersonal bonds
spark better collaboration, faster problem solving, and richer
(14:22):
innovation.
When people feel connected, they communicate more effectively,
take more creative risks, and elevate group outcomes
far beyond what any one person could ever
do alone.
And I think that's something that many people
don't want to realize is that we're great
alone, but when we're in a team, we're
(14:42):
even more powerful, more creative.
Number nine, disconnections.
Used to say the phrase, disconnections are us.
Disconnections impact us on a mental health level.
When we disconnect, whether by choice or by
some circumstances around us, our mental health suffers
(15:04):
immediately.
Prolonged isolation can lead to depression, anxiety, a
diminished sense of self-worth, and if it
gets very bad, even suicide.
Disconnection doesn't just hurt emotionally.
It deteriorates our ability to feel motivated from
(15:25):
within inside, focused and hopeful.
And when we lose hope, it's like, why
even bother, right?
Why even bother?
That's important.
Recognizing the signs and rebuilding connection can be
the lifeline to getting you back on track
(15:45):
and maybe even saving someone or your life.
Number five, number 10, building intentional connections in
daily life.
Intentional connection is about making the effort, reaching
out, checking in, making eye contact, remembering a
name, sending a voice note instead of a
(16:06):
like.
These small choices compound over time and create
a meaningful network of support and care.
Make connection a daily ritual, not an afterthought.
Why do you want to connect with somebody?
Because you just want to build a friendship.
Is there anything wrong with that?
So many people I know say they want
(16:26):
to build a friendship, but they're out for
something.
They know you can do something for them.
So that's why they want this friendship.
That's why they want this connection or this
union.
They know there's something you have and they
want it.
And that's terrible.
So intentional connection, it's about making the effort
(16:47):
first, right?
Make the connection a daily ritual, not an
afterthought.
And when you truly do that from your
heart, other people are going to see it
like, wow, this guy's pretty amazing.
Number 11, the role of community and personal
growth.
Communities, whether physical or digital, will shape us
(17:08):
daily.
They offer support, accountability, and a mirror to
our growth.
Surrounding yourself with people who inspire challenge and
uplift helps you to evolve faster and with
more joy and passion.
A strong community, folks, becomes your ecosystem for
(17:28):
thriving.
You might say, John, I'm living fine.
Yeah, and a lot of people are living
just fine.
But wouldn't you rather thrive?
Life is so much better when we learn
how to embrace it, hold by the wheel,
and enjoy that excitement.
Number 12, our last point for today.
Connection is a foundation for a better society.
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If we want to fix what's broken in
our world, the division, the polarization, the loneliness,
we must begin by reconnecting with each other.
Connection fosters empathy, and empathy inspires action.
A more connected society is a more compassionate
one, where understanding replaces judgment, and collaboration replaces
(18:13):
competition.
Remember, we've talked about this before.
We have empathy, and we have compassion.
Most strangers will demonstrate empathy just to be
polite.
You know, they'll kind of put themselves in
your shoes.
But they won't really risk themselves to take
a step to help you, or get you
to take a step to help you.
(18:33):
They just are strangers, and they're just people
like, they just don't want to get like
that involved.
So they stay on the compassionate front, because
they can show you that they have some
sympathy for you and understand.
But they're not looking to really get you
to change, and they're not looking to get
themselves to help you to change.
So that's the real important thing.
And I think these are very important lessons,
(18:55):
actually points.
What I want to do now, I should
say, I'm rushing the gun here, is I
want to do what I do after the
middle of the show here, and I do
something pretty cool.
I'm going to give you some personal stories
and lessons, basically one for each point.
(19:18):
And my reason for doing this is that
I hope it will solidify.
It will get you to take maybe something
that's abstract, and bring it into the real
world.
Now, that sounds like something that's kind of
crazy, but I got news for you guys.
When you embrace that whole spirit, your life
can change on a dime.
(19:40):
Don't believe me?
Just try it.
So again, I've got some great examples here
that I want to share with you.
And again, the reason that I'm doing this
is, I want you guys to see that
it's not just about talk.
These are things that have happened in my
own life.
And so when we start to appreciate these
things, and we're able to give, let's say,
(20:04):
a meaning to something, because now we understand
the situation, that's priceless.
And those are the kinds of things that
I will say will be empowering, because it's
going to bring you and those around you
to an entirely different level, operating on a
different frequency.
All right, number one, humans, beings are wired
(20:25):
for connection.
When I was a kid, I remember getting
lost at a carnival for a few minutes.
It was overwhelming, colors, crowds, and noise.
But what I remember most wasn't the fear.
It was the relief and the warmth of
seeing my mom's face when we found each
other again.
That hug felt like a life raft.
Even as adults, we never outgrow the need
(20:48):
to feel seen, held, and safe in someone's
presence.
This moment reminded me that connection isn't optional.
It's our DNA.
It's not a weakness to need others.
It's the sense of being human.
And I think we need to start embracing
that.
(21:10):
My second lesson, connection boosts emotional and physical
well-being.
Back in 2018, I was working nonstop, sleeping
less than four hours a night, and rarely
seeing friends.
I thought I was being productive.
But my, let's say, energy kind of tanked,
(21:31):
getting some headaches here and there, weakened immune
system, and emotional burnout.
A mentor told me to start spending time
with people who filled my cup.
I began weekly taking lunch walks with a
friend.
And within a few weeks, I felt alive
again.
That personal change proved to me that connection
(21:52):
is like oxygen.
Take a good breath.
Let out some carbon dioxide.
Invisible, but necessary to survive and thrive, right?
Just like I took that breath.
Take that great breath of oxygen and let
out carbon dioxide.
That is the magic.
(22:14):
Number three, social bonds reduce loneliness.
During the pandemic, many of us felt, shall
we say, the sting of isolation.
But for me, it was the sudden silence
after years of in-person events and client
meetings.
I started hosting short online check-ins with
friends, just 20 minutes once a week.
(22:34):
That little commitment kept loneliness at bay and
reminded me that even virtual bonds carry power.
Maybe not as much as the personal ones,
in-person ones, but virtual still do have
some power.
Sometimes the solution to isolation isn't a huge
change, but a small, steady act of reaching
out.
Number four, meaningful relationships build trust and safety.
(22:59):
A few years ago, I was part of
a business mastermind group.
At first, it felt competitive and guarded, like
many groups do.
But over time, as we began to share
our struggles and not just our wins, something
shifted.
We laughed, got vulnerable, and supported each other
through real challenges.
That group became a safe harbor.
(23:21):
I learned that trust doesn't come from perfection,
but from people showing up honestly and consistently.
Number five, technology's role in enhancing or hindering
connection.
I once messaged a friend, happy birthday, on
social media and thought I had done my
part.
(23:41):
Later, I found out they were going through
a tough time and that message had felt
impersonal.
That moment changed me.
Now I make it a point to call
or send a voice message for meaningful moments.
Tech can enhance connection if used with intention,
but it can also make us lazy if
(24:03):
we rely on it to end and replace
that genuine feeling in care, which so many
of us love to give often.
We should keep doing that.
Number six, active listing is a key for
a deeper connection.
At a networking event, I met someone who
shared a story about a personal loss.
(24:24):
I listened intently, really listened, and I didn't
offer advice or solutions.
Months later, that person reached out and said,
hey, John, you were the only one who
made me feel heard.
That stuck with me for years.
In a world full of people waiting to
speak, the rarest gift is your full, committed,
(24:45):
undivided attention.
But so many people want their voice to
be heard.
That's important.
Just listening can make somebody feel so valued.
And it doesn't cost you a penny.
Number seven, vulnerability strengthens connection.
(25:07):
I once gave a keynote speech and for
the first time shared a failure story, one
I had been ashamed of.
Afterward, a man approached me with tears in
his eyes and said, John, thank you for
sharing.
I thought I was the only one who
went through something like that.
That day, I realized vulnerability isn't weakness.
(25:28):
It's the bridge to connection.
We don't connect over our perfection.
We connect over our humanity.
Let me say that again.
We don't connect over our perfection.
We connect over our humanity.
We don't connect over perfection.
We connect over our humanity.
Number eight, connection fosters collaboration and, of course,
(25:50):
innovation.
When I worked on a team project a
while back, we were stuck creatively until we
paused to simply talk.
And get to know one another.
That human bond unlocks something magical, new ideas,
and deeper trust.
The best innovation doesn't come from isolated geniuses,
but from collaborative, connected minds.
(26:13):
The more connected the team, the more powerful
the outcome.
Number nine, disconnection's impact on mental health.
I remember speaking with a client who seemed
off.
He later admitted he hadn't spoken to anyone,
truly spoken, in weeks.
He was spiraling into depression.
(26:33):
We started weekly 15-minute phone calls, just
having someone to check in with him and
something to help him anchor his life.
Disconnection can be silent and deadly.
It can often lead to suicide or death.
But the solution is within reach.
A voice, a call, a video chat, a
(26:56):
simple, how are you?
Now, not something, like, rote, but something that
is gonna be truly from the heart.
Number 10, building intentional connections in daily life.
There's a local barista I used to see
every morning.
I started making a point to greet him
by his name and ask him how his
day was.
Over time, we became friends.
(27:18):
It wasn't forced, just consistent, intentional kindness.
Relationships don't require grand gestures.
They grow through the small, repeated actions and
acts that we take daily.
Because you know what that is?
You matter.
Number 11, the role of community and personal
growth.
When I started a mastermind community a while
back, I thought I was creating it for
(27:39):
others.
But I ended up growing the most.
I found accountability, encouragement, and mirrors who helped
me see blind spots.
Community is a mirror and a ladder.
It helps you see yourself and rise way
beyond your limits.
Surround yourself with great people who call you
higher.
(28:00):
Number 17, connection as a foundation.
I once volunteered a local soup kitchen.
At first, I thought I was there to
serve food.
But as I sat and listened to the
guests, I realized I was there to connect.
Those conversations were so powerful.
One man told me, what I miss most
isn't money.
It's people looking me in the eye.
Connection can heal, but policies can't.
(28:20):
It starts one conversation at a time.
What are you waiting for, guys?
Start making your connection and letting people feel
valued and loved in this world.
I'm John C.
Morley, serial entrepreneur.
Check out BelieveMeAchieve.com.
I'll catch you real soon, everyone.
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