September 4, 2024 • 30 mins
In today’s episode of Permission to Flow, Jessica Hwang dives into the transformative journey of learning to surf in Wilmington, North Carolina, and how this experience mirrors the challenges and joys of transitioning from a corporate job to a creative career. Jessica shares her personal story of stepping out of her comfort zone and embracing the process of learning something entirely new. Through her reflections, she highlights the importance of making little tweaks, truly enjoying each step of the learning journey, and getting back up after setbacks. This episode is a heartfelt exploration of the joys and frustrations of being a beginner and continuously growing.
Jessica also offers valuable insights for aspiring creatives, emphasizing the importance of finding activities that align naturally with one’s interests. By drawing parallels between her love for baking and her discovery of an affinity for pottery, she encourages listeners to experiment within their interests to find fulfilling creative outlets. The episode is filled with encouraging messages about perseverance, embracing imperfections, and the value of starting somewhere, no matter where that might be. Whether you’re navigating a career change or just looking to pick up a new hobby, Jessica’s experiences and advice will inspire you to embrace the process and stay open to all the learning opportunities along the way.
Topics discussed in this episode include:
00:00 Step out of comfort zone, embrace new experiences.
06:07 Little tweaks
14:05 Embrace the Process
22:17 Get back up again
Quotes from the episode:
"To me, success is actually having the freedom to experiment. Experimentation is freedom and succeeding in and of itself."
"What I have found really actually helps me move forward is focusing in on one change at a time."
Links from the Episode:
Episode 26 - Embracing the Beginner's Mind: How to Approach Learning with Curiosity and Openness
Connect with Jessica:
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
(00:02):
Do you ever feel uneasy stepping outside of your comfort zone and trying something
new? If so, then this episode is for
you. Hi, I'm Jessica Hwang, your career transition coach.
And welcome to this episode of permission to flow.
So this past weekend, I was in Wilmington, North Carolina, and
outside of what I was planning, my friends and I decided to go
(00:25):
surfing. And originally I was kind of like, I don't know, this might
not be for me, and over kind of a few
days, but after a little bit and kind of
being in water again and spending some time, I decided to do it.
And so this episode is really going to be
my. This episode is really
(00:48):
focused on the things that I have kind of acquired
over time through all the different things I do that has
made me into a better learner and made taking up
surfing to be a much more adaptable skill than I thought it
would be. And so here's the thing I will
preface in. There's. There's two big things going on here
(01:10):
in terms of surfing. So I will say
that I definitely went in with translative skills, right?
Like, I was able to apply a lot of my
ability to my
general athleticism. Definitely came into play. All the
yoga, all the acro yoga, balancing all these things
(01:33):
definitely benefited me in terms of being able to pick up
surfing. But then on the other side of this is
that I was going in with, a, just having
no idea what surfing really took, but b, I
am not the most comfortable person with water. I actually did not
think I knew how to swim until the day before we went.
(01:55):
So it turns out I
can swim enough. And also,
we were generally in an area that
I could stand up in. And so it
wasn't really, like, a strong requirement, honestly, to swim
in the case of surfing lessons.
(02:18):
But it definitely was something that made me uneasy
and hesitate around it. But ultimately, I
decided that with the instructors, with everyone around, I would
give it a try and see how it goes, and you can always bail out.
If I was like, oh, God, this isn't working for me.
So that's kind of the background of what was going
(02:40):
on in my head prior to swimming. I mean, surfing.
But I want to talk through some of the things that really helped
me in terms of being able to pick up a new skill, try
it on, and ultimately, like, enjoy the process.
So this. In this episode, I'm going to dive in a
little bit into that, because ultimately, if you are someone that
(03:02):
is looking to make a career change, you usually have to
learn new things. Right? And I will tell you, especially
as an entrepreneur, and someone that made a
complete 180 on my career. It has
required me to pick up a lot of new skills,
and it's these things I'm going to talk about that
(03:24):
have been critical in terms of my ability to kind of
learn and adjust and keep going.
And so I was thinking about how, because of the fact that
I am a very, I don't know, fairly
skilled in just learning, that it helped me be able to
pick up surfing a lot easier and
(03:46):
enjoy the process in a way that not everyone does. Right.
Like, I. I think that whenever we deal with
getting, um, starting, learning a new skill, it's often
that there's. There can be a lot of fear involved, and there can be a
lot of. What's the other word that I was thinking of?
(04:14):
And there can be a lot of frustration. And so I
feel like these two elements, the fear and the frustration, can be things
that really stop us from wanting to move forward
and trying new things. And it's like, to
me, I think it's very sad because it's like, we don't get
to. It's like, what if the thing
(04:36):
that you're holding back on trying could be something that you enjoy
so deeply? And so I think the more that we
allow ourselves to experiment, try new things, and
embrace, like, just the ability to do something
different is going to enrich our lives,
allow us to, who knows, make complete
(04:59):
different changes, add and enrich our lives in ways
that we can't even imagine. So that is really the focus of this
episode, is this ability to step outside of
our comfort zone, learn something new, and
enjoy something that is not something that we've been doing before.
So,
(05:23):
in this episode, we are going to focus on three ideas. One of
them is being able to do little tweaks, is what I call it.
Second, we're going to talk about embracing the process. And third, we're going
to talk about getting back up again.
I feel like I should put a little bit of lipstick on.
(05:47):
All right, hold, please.
Now, let's dive into today's show.
All right, so the first thing that I want to talk about is
(06:10):
this idea of little tweaks.
So the first thing I want to talk about. So the first thing I
want to talk about is this idea of little tweaks. This is one of my
favorite concepts. It's definitely something that I have had to kind of like,
take on over time, through the podcast,
through Instagram posts, through so many different things.
(06:32):
And it's something that has really,
really helped me in terms of being able to try
new things and keep going. And
so in terms of surfing, every single time,
and surfing was very interesting because I will tell you, it's
like, I didn't get that many attempts in, if you think about it,
(06:54):
right. It's not like every single second, I'm, like, riding another wave. It's like there's
a lot of in between time where you're actually, like, paddling out.
And so it
was, but what do I want to say?
There's a lot of time where you're just, like, paddling out to get
(07:15):
to be able to be able to go and
actually surf a wave. And so it's interesting
because every single time I would finally get out there, get ready, like, be
ready to go and ride a wave, it was like I wanted
to get feedback and I wanted
to be able to make slight adjustments. So
(07:37):
this is what I mean by little tweaks is like,
I don't think that I'm like, oh, everything that I just did
is terrible and, like, worthless. It's like, okay, I did
a thing. This is what worked. This is what might
not have. Give me a little bit of feedback and let me try
again. And so I, this is so important
(08:00):
because I think we have, like, many of
us tend to have this kind of, like, all or nothing,
burn it to the ground kind of mentality where it's like
I either did it perfectly or everything is trash. Right.
And instead it's like, how can we look at it as, like,
every single effort is important, is teaching us
(08:22):
something, is helping us move in the right direction. And
I need to make some slight adjustments to get a little bit
better. And so as whether or not
you're learning surfing or a new skill or absolutely
anything, I think that this is such an important thing
about learning that we need to take into account
(08:44):
is this idea of it's just little
adjustments, right? Like, what you're already doing
is good and it can be a little bit
better. And so it's not like, because
otherwise we're, like, flinging ourselves in all different directions,
but it's like, this is good, a little bit better.
(09:07):
And I think this is also important because it's like, when we get too much
feedback, if we have too many things that we're trying to
adjust on, then it becomes overwhelming for our brains
where if I'm like, okay, I need to completely move myself in a completely
different direction, and I need to do this, that, and the other thing, and, like,
everything is wrong, it's going to overwhelm you. Right. And then
(09:28):
you like, we'll get frazzled and then, like, nothing happens. So instead
it's like, okay, let me focus in on one thing that I want to
adjust every single time instead of trying to, like,
fix and correct everything. And this just
allows us to, a, recognize our, like,
current efforts are worth while, and b, recognize the
(09:50):
fact that, like, we're not that far off
realistically and not to overwhelm ourselves so that we're
just making one adjustment at a time.
I will tell you that personally, it's so hard to do
this. I love to. I am definitely the
type of person that likes to try and make a billion changes, and I have,
(10:12):
like, ideas cooking up, like, in all directions. But what
I have found really actually helps me move forward is
focusing in on one change at a time. And I know we
don't like to do that. We love to be able to, like, you know,
make a million changes, but realistically, I think to
really sustain ourselves and be able to move forward in the best way
(10:34):
possible, it does require looking at it as, like, it's all just little
tweaks, just little adjustments one at a time, and
they eventually add up and get us there. So this was
definitely a great kind of
thing to think about as I was learning to surf. And so
I hope you can apply that in whatever it is that you're doing,
(10:57):
because little tweaks has it also makes it more
sustainable because, I mean, granted, with surfing, I'm
not planning a surf every single weekend. I mean, who knows? Maybe. Maybe I'll do
it more. But with things that you're trying to do,
especially on a regular cadence, like, let's say
if you're doing content creation or you're doing a podcast or
(11:19):
you're painting or whatever, it really is important
from a longevity standpoint to not look at it as this
all or nothing, not look at it as, like, I got to throw everything out
the window. Nothing is working. That mentality is only
going to get us, a, to feel really disheartened
in what we're trying to do, and b, it just makes us
(11:41):
so that we're, what's the word?
What's the other?
And b, we can really hold ourselves back from. From
(12:03):
really continuing. Wait, was that my first point?
I don't remember. Now I'm gonna change. I'm gonna start over this whole
sentence. All right. Having this kind of all or
nothing mentality is going to really stop you from being able to
have that longevity in something, right? If we're too
overly focused on perfecting in one, I think I
(12:27):
mentioned this in another episode that we're really thinking of, like,
quantity over quality sometimes where it's like, how can I just keep
myself moving and iterating and being
in that kind of motion, forward
motion, and instead of it being like, oh, I'm
going up and down and like, oh, it's got to be
(12:49):
100% or it's pretty much 0%. It's like we're
allowing ourselves to be. To be incrementally moving forward.
And I think that this is super important so that
it doesn't burn us out, too. Right. Because if you
are telling yourself that all of
your efforts are for nothing and you got to change absolutely everything and throw the
(13:11):
kitchen sink at your problem, it makes you feel
like, oh, everything I'm doing is a waste of my time and why am I
doing it? But no, every single little adjustment,
every single time that you're trying something again is
worthwhile. And it's like allowing that to be part of the
process and appreciating that it's part of the process.
(13:34):
Right. Appreciating, like, okay. Like, I'm just going to
keep going, and it's.
And I'm going to learn from every single little piece of the
puzzle of me, or I'm going to learn from every
single attempt that I make, and maybe it's just a little
bit. Every single time.
(13:59):
All right, so that was my little spiel on little
tweaks. So now let's dive into the next point, which is embracing
the process. So this one was
very interesting, especially in terms of surfing. So, as I
mentioned, a lot of the time actually was
nothing spent on the actual, like, riding a
(14:21):
wave. Right. Which is the, like, fun part that we want to get to.
There's actually a lot more that went into it. And especially on the day that
we went, the water was
a little choppier. And it was interesting because my friends, some of them had
gone two years ago, and they were like, oh, the waves were
so mild that day. Like, it was so much easier.
(14:42):
And the day that we went was not quite that. The
water was kind of rough. I was definitely getting tossed around.
Around. I might throw in some video footage of
how I was getting thrown around in the waves,
so. But it was something else.
It was something else. Anyway, I. Yeah, so there's.
(15:05):
Yeah, I hilariously recorded a video, and, yes, I got to
capture myself, like, riding a wave in nicely, but I also got
to capture myself, like, getting freaking pummeled by a wave
and my surfboard, like, going all over the place. And me, like,
flying all over the place, which I find hilarious
now, but in the moment, I was like, oh, my God. But anyway, the point
(15:27):
is that with absolutely. With most
things, there is some part of it
that you might not enjoy 100%. Right?
So in terms of surfing, it was like, there was definitely a lot of our
time that was us trying to get out into
wherever the, like, where we want to go to, like, ride a wave
(15:49):
in, right? And so it's like,
I could have just been like, oh, I hate this part. Like, I'm so
frustrated by the waves crashing on me and
getting thrown around and. And feeling
like this isn't what I signed up for, for surfing. Or
I could look at it and go, this is part of the process. And
(16:12):
also, if you think about little tweaks, I can also think, how can I
get better at this part, right? How can I get better at the part
that is kicking my ass right now as well as the part that
is more enjoyable and, like, what I'm, like, trying to focus on? So
I think it's really important. With most things, there
are puts and takes, right? Like, there's parts of it that we love and there's
(16:34):
parts of it that we don't love. And it's like, how can we kind of
embrace the whole of the process and see it all as part of. As
part of what the thing is that we are doing? Because I think that
this is something that is true of most things.
You're not going to love 100% of the process.
(16:56):
That's just not how it works. In order for me
to show up on the podcast, I'm not going to
love certain elements to the production of it.
But I love this part. I love the recording. I
love being able to talk to you in this method.
And so it's like I've learned to navigate and figure out
(17:19):
how do I make things a little easier and
embrace the other parts of the process of making this podcast
happen. But
in order for me to still do this thing right.
And so I think that no matter what we're doing, it's like learning
to embrace it. And almost like
(17:42):
it's like, how can we enjoy, or
what's the word? Yeah. How can we embrace
learning through the hard parts as well
as the thing that we love? That's
what it is.
(18:03):
Okay, so now that we've talked about little tweaks
and embracing the process, the third part that I want
to talk about is getting back up again. And,
you know, at the beginning of this episode, I mentioned frustration
and frustration, I think,
is, oh, let's
(18:25):
see.
Oh, let me make, actually, let me make one last point about embracing the
process. One more thing
about embracing the process is like, sometimes we can
have, like, kind of hold ourselves back because
we're holding on to being afraid that we're not good at certain elements
(18:49):
or not wanting to start certain things because we're like, oh, well, I
know I'm good at this part, but I don't like this part. And so I
don't want to start at all. Right. And so I mentioned at the
beginning about fear. Fear is something that
holds us back often a lot of the time, because we might
have some. For instance, I could say when you look at
(19:10):
how I was like, well, I know I'm pretty
physically fit, so theoretically I can do this, but then I
have my fear of the water. And so it's like, how can
I navigate that? Right? When I was concerned
about that, I was like, well, let me get into water. Let me get acclimated
with it. Let me figure out what would make me feel safer around
(19:32):
it in order for me to step forward with it.
A different example that's a little less, why is my
computer not plugged in and about to die?
(20:00):
And so another example with, like, the podcast is that I
was like, okay, I think I can manage talking on the camera,
but how do I feel about all the production work and navigating
all that? And so it's like I had to test a little bit of that
out and see how it felt about it. But the thing is,
sometimes you have to just
(20:22):
try things on. And I
was thinking, I was talking to my friend while I was away, and
something that kind of spurred into my mind is
this idea of what is success? And to
me, success is actually having the freedom to
experiment. Experimentation is
(20:43):
freedom and succeeding in and of itself. So it doesn't matter if
you're actually become the best. It doesn't matter
if I became the best surfer. It didn't matter if I became the best podcaster
or whatever the case may be. But just the ability to
experiment and play around with it and give it a shot is already
succeeding. And so I think that that is what something that is
(21:06):
really important is. It's like, how can we embrace that process
of I'm just giving it a try
and seeing how it feels and not feeling like this needs to be a
forever thing, or like, if I try this thing, I need to do it for
all eternity, but instead being like, I'm just going to test the water, I'm going
to toe dip and see what happens. And if I don't
(21:28):
like it, I can bail out. As I said, if I was like,
if I rode one waven and then I was like, no, the fear is too
much. I can't handle it. I don't like this. I could have
stopped, right? Like, I didn't have to continue on. And
yes, you could say, like, oh, but you paid for a whole hour session.
Like, who cares, right? Like, this was meant for me to
(21:49):
be like, I want to try a new thing and have a little fun. So
it's like, how can we have more fun with it and
embrace the process and make it a
smaller thing so that we can get past the things that
we might be afraid of and just be
in the experimentation of it and trying it on?
(22:11):
Okay. Now I've said all I want to say about
embracing the process. And so we've talked
about little tweaks, embracing the process. So now I want to talk about getting
back up again. And this one is
definitely key to the frustration, right? So
it's that fear and the frustration, I think, are two of the biggest
(22:33):
obstacles around trying new things. But when we talk about
frustration, this one is real, and I get it.
And I think the embracing the process actually also speaks a lot
to the frustration, overcoming that frustration. But
how do we keep ourselves to keep getting back up? And
with surfing, it was so interesting because
(22:56):
I think about water is such an
unpredictable thing. It's gonna.
The waves are gonna crash over you. They're gonna do whatever they want to do.
And it was definitely such a great meditation
on literally being in the flow. Right? Like,
flowing with the water. Like, how can we
(23:19):
not be fighting with it? Because it definitely
could feel that way sometimes. Or you're like, oh, I have to fight
the waves every time. And it was like, how can I allow
the waves to be doing what they're going to do and I'm going to
navigate that. And so
it was interesting because I actually,
(23:42):
I think it's so easy to get frustrated when you're doing
things like this because it's like, I don't
have that much control and, like, the waves are bigger than I want them to
be. Like, you can create so much, like, so
many things that are. That are
frustrating, right? That are, like, out of your control and annoying
(24:04):
you, and you're like, well, I wanted to do this, but then this is happening.
And, like, it's definitely, I think, a
great practice. And
in terms of letting go and just allowing
yourself to be in that flow. And. And I think that this
is something that is so important, is like, so much of
(24:26):
getting back up again is about the story that you're telling yourself.
And to me, in order to keep going, in order to pick myself
back up, I'm like, it's
allowing. Remember, fear is excitement on
pause. So it's like, how can we lean into the excitement and
the enjoyment of the process
(24:48):
and really embracing the fact that, oh, I
like, every single time I just gotta get back up and give it another
go and not getting hung up and the like,
oh, I'm so bad at this, or I am
not. Well, really, just being
in beginner's mind is really, I think, one of the most important
(25:10):
things. I have a whole separate episode. It's episode 26
on beginner's mind, so definitely check that one out. But what I will
say about it is it's like allowing yourself to be in kind of an
openness to the experience
and not thinking that you have to be perfect.
And I think that this is one of the most important things about being
(25:32):
a great learner, is just embracing your
imperfections and enjoying the
process of doing those little tweaks,
of getting a little bit better and enjoying that process.
And that is what really allows us to keep getting back up again.
That is what allows us to not get overly frustrated.
(25:55):
And every single time it's like, okay, that didn't quite work. Let
me try it again. Let me do it a little bit differently. Navigating
it from that headspace is going to allow you to be like,
okay, this one didn't work, try it again.
And I think that when we feel like we're
(26:15):
not improving is something that can really make us be
like, well, nevermind, throw this out the window. And
to that, I would say,
hmm, what would I say?
(26:39):
And to that, I would ask yourself, like, what is improving?
Because as we do things
repeatedly, we do just naturally improve
from just repetition. And I think that this is
something that can really hold us
back. Is that thing of saying, well, I want to be good
(27:00):
on the first try
sometimes, yes, that's great. Like, it can happen, especially when you do
have translative skills, but it's not always
going to be that way. Right? And sometimes it's like, how can you,
like, feel like, just,
(27:21):
how can you laugh about not being great at something? How can
you embrace the fact that, like, you're trying something new and
give yourself the credit for that alone and then go,
okay, well, if I keep trying it multiple times, like I'm going to to get
better at it. So I think it's more of that mentality
of embracing the fact that, like, you might not be
(27:43):
the best at day one, but you will improve over
time. And seeing, like, is this something I even want
to improve in? You know, you're. Again, it is just an
experiment. And, like, allowing yourself
to test it out multiple times in whatever it is that
you're doing. And then seeing, like, do I like this? Do I not?
(28:05):
And if you don't, that's okay. Like, try something else. Right.
I also like to think of it as, like, it's interesting because it's like,
there's so many, like, related things
and, you know, in terms of, like, physical activity, right.
There's. I personally, I'm doing, like, yoga, acro yoga, like,
you know, but then there's rock climbing and surfing and, like, skateboarding and
(28:28):
snowboarding. You know, there's so many different things. And it's like, you
get to figure out which one of those you actually enjoy. If we're talking
about creativity, it's like, you can paint, you can draw, you can
sew. There's so many different methodologies.
I also like to see it as under this
umbrella here are all these different options. Do any of them speak to me?
(28:51):
Do I want to try them out? And allowing yourself to have
fun with testing out different things that are under the same
umbrella and. And maybe some of those are going to
resonate with you, and some of them, you're going to be like, God damn, I
did not enjoy that. And that's perfectly fine.
So to me, around getting back up again,
(29:12):
it's like, all right, maybe the tweak is actually that you, like, want to try
a different type of something in that umbrella,
right? That can also be one thing where you're like, okay, I'm going to,
like, shift over here and give that a try. But it's all
about allowing ourselves to be in the process and trying again
and trying again and picking ourselves back up instead of saying
(29:34):
like, oh, like, I, none of this is ever going to work, and throwing it
out the window. It's like if you have some kind of inclination
that you want to try and go in a direction, if you're like, well, I
want to do something creative, I don't know what that looks like.
Well, maybe it is that, like, the first one that you pick up is not
going to be for you. And you're like, oh, like, what is something that could
(29:56):
be more? And really, I would say looking for those
translative skills is really helpful at the end of the day, you
know, I generally love to do things. Like,
I love to work with my hands. So it's like, I really like
baking. And therefore, like, pottery came kind of, like, naturally to me because
it's like a similar kind of tactile type of
(30:18):
medium. Right. And so I would say, like, for you, it's
like asking yourself, like, what are the things that
I do enjoy? And finding things that, like,
under this umbrella that kind of fit into, like, things that you
naturally are interested in allows
you to kind of enjoy the process more.
(30:40):
So these are some of my thoughts around
becoming a
so these are some of my thoughts around becoming a better learner. So,
to me, learning is all about making those little tweaks,
embracing the whole process, and learning
to get back up again. And so
(31:03):
did I say everything I want to say around getting back up again?
Oh,
and the last thing I want to say about getting back up again is
(31:25):
in the learning process, you might get knocked around a bit. And, you
know, surfing definitely taught me that. I got thrown into the water in so
many ways that I definitely swallowed a lot of
salt water while I was there. But to me, it's
like, how can we kind of
know that going in, right? Know that, like, not everything's going to go
(31:47):
perfectly, especially at the very beginning stages,
but everyone has to start somewhere. You know, no
one. Like, yes, there are people that are like savants at
things, but we all start somewhere. You know, I had to start
at episode one of my podcast. You know,
I had to go through getting thrown into the water in a million different
(32:09):
ways in the process of learning to surface. So it's
like allowing yourself to know that, like, okay, it might be a little
rocky at the beginning, but I
am going to embrace the fact that that is part of the
process.
(32:29):
Okay.
Okay. So those are my thoughts on what has
helped me become a better learner. And
I hope you enjoyed some of my anecdotes around learning how to surf,
because let me tell you, it was quite the experience. And side note, I've been
(32:50):
watching the Olympians do. Oh, maybe I
won't mention that because this timing is going to be much later than this.
I'm not going to mention that. Oh, no, I will. And side
note, I was watching the Olympics and the people that
are surfing these intense, massive waves.
I'm like, good for them. What an incredible thing to be doing.
(33:12):
I cannot imagine it. But, you know, I imagine
that some of them had. They also had to start
somewhere. So, remember, for everyone
that has become, like, these incredible
amazing Olympians or artists or whatever the case may
be, they all had to start somewhere. And so it's like,
(33:35):
the only way that we're going to find the thing that really suits
us, the thing that we really want to grow with, is by
embracing the beginning of just learning,
is by embracing the process of learning. And so that
is what this episode is all about. And I hope it's been helpful. I
(33:57):
hope you will go out there and take on a new hobby
or. No. And I hope that
you enjoyed this episode and you're going to take on a new skill or try
something different that you haven't done before and
enjoy the process of learning again. Because unlike
my former belief that was after I turn, like, 26,
(34:19):
I'll never be able to learn again. I will tell you, I've been learning all
kinds of things, and because of all of the thoughts
and the things that I've shared in this episode, learning has
become one of my absolute favorite things to do. And
I'm, like, constantly picking up new things. Like, everyone around me is
like, Jess, how do you do so many different things or try all these different
(34:41):
things? It's because I just love it. And so I hope that
you can find a little more love for being a beginner, of trying
something new and enjoying the process.
Okay. Why are we.
Are we good? Okay.
(35:05):
And if you need help with starting off and
figuring out what that new skill might be, or embracing that
process and moving forward in terms of building your own creative
career, then book a free sales call with me. Link is in the show
notes, and I would be delighted in helping you on your journey.
And until next time, I
(35:29):
so thank you so much for listening and tuning
in, and I will. Let me say that again,
and thank you so much for tuning into this episode, and I
will see you in the next one.
Do you ever feel uneasy stepping outside of your comfort zone and trying something
new? If so, then this episode is for
you. Hi, I'm Jessica Hwang, your career transition coach.
And welcome to this episode of permission to flow.
So this past weekend, I was in Wilmington, North Carolina, and
outside of what I was planning, my friends and I decided to go
(00:25):
surfing. And originally I was kind of like, I don't know, this might
not be for me, and over kind of a few
days, but after a little bit and kind of
being in water again and spending some time, I decided to do it.
And so this episode is really going to be
my. This episode is really
(00:48):
focused on the things that I have kind of acquired
over time through all the different things I do that has
made me into a better learner and made taking up
surfing to be a much more adaptable skill than I thought it
would be. And so here's the thing I will
preface in. There's. There's two big things going on here
(01:10):
in terms of surfing. So I will say
that I definitely went in with translative skills, right?
Like, I was able to apply a lot of my
ability to my
general athleticism. Definitely came into play. All the
yoga, all the acro yoga, balancing all these things
(01:33):
definitely benefited me in terms of being able to pick up
surfing. But then on the other side of this is
that I was going in with, a, just having
no idea what surfing really took, but b, I
am not the most comfortable person with water. I actually did not
think I knew how to swim until the day before we went.
(01:55):
So it turns out I
can swim enough. And also,
we were generally in an area that
I could stand up in. And so it
wasn't really, like, a strong requirement, honestly, to swim
in the case of surfing lessons.
(02:18):
But it definitely was something that made me uneasy
and hesitate around it. But ultimately, I
decided that with the instructors, with everyone around, I would
give it a try and see how it goes, and you can always bail out.
If I was like, oh, God, this isn't working for me.
So that's kind of the background of what was going
(02:40):
on in my head prior to swimming. I mean, surfing.
But I want to talk through some of the things that really helped
me in terms of being able to pick up a new skill, try
it on, and ultimately, like, enjoy the process.
So this. In this episode, I'm going to dive in a
little bit into that, because ultimately, if you are someone that
(03:02):
is looking to make a career change, you usually have to
learn new things. Right? And I will tell you, especially
as an entrepreneur, and someone that made a
complete 180 on my career. It has
required me to pick up a lot of new skills,
and it's these things I'm going to talk about that
(03:24):
have been critical in terms of my ability to kind of
learn and adjust and keep going.
And so I was thinking about how, because of the fact that
I am a very, I don't know, fairly
skilled in just learning, that it helped me be able to
pick up surfing a lot easier and
(03:46):
enjoy the process in a way that not everyone does. Right.
Like, I. I think that whenever we deal with
getting, um, starting, learning a new skill, it's often
that there's. There can be a lot of fear involved, and there can be a
lot of. What's the other word that I was thinking of?
(04:14):
And there can be a lot of frustration. And so I
feel like these two elements, the fear and the frustration, can be things
that really stop us from wanting to move forward
and trying new things. And it's like, to
me, I think it's very sad because it's like, we don't get
to. It's like, what if the thing
(04:36):
that you're holding back on trying could be something that you enjoy
so deeply? And so I think the more that we
allow ourselves to experiment, try new things, and
embrace, like, just the ability to do something
different is going to enrich our lives,
allow us to, who knows, make complete
(04:59):
different changes, add and enrich our lives in ways
that we can't even imagine. So that is really the focus of this
episode, is this ability to step outside of
our comfort zone, learn something new, and
enjoy something that is not something that we've been doing before.
So,
(05:23):
in this episode, we are going to focus on three ideas. One of
them is being able to do little tweaks, is what I call it.
Second, we're going to talk about embracing the process. And third, we're going
to talk about getting back up again.
I feel like I should put a little bit of lipstick on.
(05:47):
All right, hold, please.
Now, let's dive into today's show.
All right, so the first thing that I want to talk about is
(06:10):
this idea of little tweaks.
So the first thing I want to talk about. So the first thing I
want to talk about is this idea of little tweaks. This is one of my
favorite concepts. It's definitely something that I have had to kind of like,
take on over time, through the podcast,
through Instagram posts, through so many different things.
(06:32):
And it's something that has really,
really helped me in terms of being able to try
new things and keep going. And
so in terms of surfing, every single time,
and surfing was very interesting because I will tell you, it's
like, I didn't get that many attempts in, if you think about it,
(06:54):
right. It's not like every single second, I'm, like, riding another wave. It's like there's
a lot of in between time where you're actually, like, paddling out.
And so it
was, but what do I want to say?
There's a lot of time where you're just, like, paddling out to get
(07:15):
to be able to be able to go and
actually surf a wave. And so it's interesting
because every single time I would finally get out there, get ready, like, be
ready to go and ride a wave, it was like I wanted
to get feedback and I wanted
to be able to make slight adjustments. So
(07:37):
this is what I mean by little tweaks is like,
I don't think that I'm like, oh, everything that I just did
is terrible and, like, worthless. It's like, okay, I did
a thing. This is what worked. This is what might
not have. Give me a little bit of feedback and let me try
again. And so I, this is so important
(08:00):
because I think we have, like, many of
us tend to have this kind of, like, all or nothing,
burn it to the ground kind of mentality where it's like
I either did it perfectly or everything is trash. Right.
And instead it's like, how can we look at it as, like,
every single effort is important, is teaching us
(08:22):
something, is helping us move in the right direction. And
I need to make some slight adjustments to get a little bit
better. And so as whether or not
you're learning surfing or a new skill or absolutely
anything, I think that this is such an important thing
about learning that we need to take into account
(08:44):
is this idea of it's just little
adjustments, right? Like, what you're already doing
is good and it can be a little bit
better. And so it's not like, because
otherwise we're, like, flinging ourselves in all different directions,
but it's like, this is good, a little bit better.
(09:07):
And I think this is also important because it's like, when we get too much
feedback, if we have too many things that we're trying to
adjust on, then it becomes overwhelming for our brains
where if I'm like, okay, I need to completely move myself in a completely
different direction, and I need to do this, that, and the other thing, and, like,
everything is wrong, it's going to overwhelm you. Right. And then
(09:28):
you like, we'll get frazzled and then, like, nothing happens. So instead
it's like, okay, let me focus in on one thing that I want to
adjust every single time instead of trying to, like,
fix and correct everything. And this just
allows us to, a, recognize our, like,
current efforts are worth while, and b, recognize the
(09:50):
fact that, like, we're not that far off
realistically and not to overwhelm ourselves so that we're
just making one adjustment at a time.
I will tell you that personally, it's so hard to do
this. I love to. I am definitely the
type of person that likes to try and make a billion changes, and I have,
(10:12):
like, ideas cooking up, like, in all directions. But what
I have found really actually helps me move forward is
focusing in on one change at a time. And I know we
don't like to do that. We love to be able to, like, you know,
make a million changes, but realistically, I think to
really sustain ourselves and be able to move forward in the best way
(10:34):
possible, it does require looking at it as, like, it's all just little
tweaks, just little adjustments one at a time, and
they eventually add up and get us there. So this was
definitely a great kind of
thing to think about as I was learning to surf. And so
I hope you can apply that in whatever it is that you're doing,
(10:57):
because little tweaks has it also makes it more
sustainable because, I mean, granted, with surfing, I'm
not planning a surf every single weekend. I mean, who knows? Maybe. Maybe I'll do
it more. But with things that you're trying to do,
especially on a regular cadence, like, let's say
if you're doing content creation or you're doing a podcast or
(11:19):
you're painting or whatever, it really is important
from a longevity standpoint to not look at it as this
all or nothing, not look at it as, like, I got to throw everything out
the window. Nothing is working. That mentality is only
going to get us, a, to feel really disheartened
in what we're trying to do, and b, it just makes us
(11:41):
so that we're, what's the word?
What's the other?
And b, we can really hold ourselves back from. From
(12:03):
really continuing. Wait, was that my first point?
I don't remember. Now I'm gonna change. I'm gonna start over this whole
sentence. All right. Having this kind of all or
nothing mentality is going to really stop you from being able to
have that longevity in something, right? If we're too
overly focused on perfecting in one, I think I
(12:27):
mentioned this in another episode that we're really thinking of, like,
quantity over quality sometimes where it's like, how can I just keep
myself moving and iterating and being
in that kind of motion, forward
motion, and instead of it being like, oh, I'm
going up and down and like, oh, it's got to be
(12:49):
100% or it's pretty much 0%. It's like we're
allowing ourselves to be. To be incrementally moving forward.
And I think that this is super important so that
it doesn't burn us out, too. Right. Because if you
are telling yourself that all of
your efforts are for nothing and you got to change absolutely everything and throw the
(13:11):
kitchen sink at your problem, it makes you feel
like, oh, everything I'm doing is a waste of my time and why am I
doing it? But no, every single little adjustment,
every single time that you're trying something again is
worthwhile. And it's like allowing that to be part of the
process and appreciating that it's part of the process.
(13:34):
Right. Appreciating, like, okay. Like, I'm just going to
keep going, and it's.
And I'm going to learn from every single little piece of the
puzzle of me, or I'm going to learn from every
single attempt that I make, and maybe it's just a little
bit. Every single time.
(13:59):
All right, so that was my little spiel on little
tweaks. So now let's dive into the next point, which is embracing
the process. So this one was
very interesting, especially in terms of surfing. So, as I
mentioned, a lot of the time actually was
nothing spent on the actual, like, riding a
(14:21):
wave. Right. Which is the, like, fun part that we want to get to.
There's actually a lot more that went into it. And especially on the day that
we went, the water was
a little choppier. And it was interesting because my friends, some of them had
gone two years ago, and they were like, oh, the waves were
so mild that day. Like, it was so much easier.
(14:42):
And the day that we went was not quite that. The
water was kind of rough. I was definitely getting tossed around.
Around. I might throw in some video footage of
how I was getting thrown around in the waves,
so. But it was something else.
It was something else. Anyway, I. Yeah, so there's.
(15:05):
Yeah, I hilariously recorded a video, and, yes, I got to
capture myself, like, riding a wave in nicely, but I also got
to capture myself, like, getting freaking pummeled by a wave
and my surfboard, like, going all over the place. And me, like,
flying all over the place, which I find hilarious
now, but in the moment, I was like, oh, my God. But anyway, the point
(15:27):
is that with absolutely. With most
things, there is some part of it
that you might not enjoy 100%. Right?
So in terms of surfing, it was like, there was definitely a lot of our
time that was us trying to get out into
wherever the, like, where we want to go to, like, ride a wave
(15:49):
in, right? And so it's like,
I could have just been like, oh, I hate this part. Like, I'm so
frustrated by the waves crashing on me and
getting thrown around and. And feeling
like this isn't what I signed up for, for surfing. Or
I could look at it and go, this is part of the process. And
(16:12):
also, if you think about little tweaks, I can also think, how can I
get better at this part, right? How can I get better at the part
that is kicking my ass right now as well as the part that
is more enjoyable and, like, what I'm, like, trying to focus on? So
I think it's really important. With most things, there
are puts and takes, right? Like, there's parts of it that we love and there's
(16:34):
parts of it that we don't love. And it's like, how can we kind of
embrace the whole of the process and see it all as part of. As
part of what the thing is that we are doing? Because I think that
this is something that is true of most things.
You're not going to love 100% of the process.
(16:56):
That's just not how it works. In order for me
to show up on the podcast, I'm not going to
love certain elements to the production of it.
But I love this part. I love the recording. I
love being able to talk to you in this method.
And so it's like I've learned to navigate and figure out
(17:19):
how do I make things a little easier and
embrace the other parts of the process of making this podcast
happen. But
in order for me to still do this thing right.
And so I think that no matter what we're doing, it's like learning
to embrace it. And almost like
(17:42):
it's like, how can we enjoy, or
what's the word? Yeah. How can we embrace
learning through the hard parts as well
as the thing that we love? That's
what it is.
(18:03):
Okay, so now that we've talked about little tweaks
and embracing the process, the third part that I want
to talk about is getting back up again. And,
you know, at the beginning of this episode, I mentioned frustration
and frustration, I think,
is, oh, let's
(18:25):
see.
Oh, let me make, actually, let me make one last point about embracing the
process. One more thing
about embracing the process is like, sometimes we can
have, like, kind of hold ourselves back because
we're holding on to being afraid that we're not good at certain elements
(18:49):
or not wanting to start certain things because we're like, oh, well, I
know I'm good at this part, but I don't like this part. And so I
don't want to start at all. Right. And so I mentioned at the
beginning about fear. Fear is something that
holds us back often a lot of the time, because we might
have some. For instance, I could say when you look at
(19:10):
how I was like, well, I know I'm pretty
physically fit, so theoretically I can do this, but then I
have my fear of the water. And so it's like, how can
I navigate that? Right? When I was concerned
about that, I was like, well, let me get into water. Let me get acclimated
with it. Let me figure out what would make me feel safer around
(19:32):
it in order for me to step forward with it.
A different example that's a little less, why is my
computer not plugged in and about to die?
(20:00):
And so another example with, like, the podcast is that I
was like, okay, I think I can manage talking on the camera,
but how do I feel about all the production work and navigating
all that? And so it's like I had to test a little bit of that
out and see how it felt about it. But the thing is,
sometimes you have to just
(20:22):
try things on. And I
was thinking, I was talking to my friend while I was away, and
something that kind of spurred into my mind is
this idea of what is success? And to
me, success is actually having the freedom to
experiment. Experimentation is
(20:43):
freedom and succeeding in and of itself. So it doesn't matter if
you're actually become the best. It doesn't matter
if I became the best surfer. It didn't matter if I became the best podcaster
or whatever the case may be. But just the ability to
experiment and play around with it and give it a shot is already
succeeding. And so I think that that is what something that is
(21:06):
really important is. It's like, how can we embrace that process
of I'm just giving it a try
and seeing how it feels and not feeling like this needs to be a
forever thing, or like, if I try this thing, I need to do it for
all eternity, but instead being like, I'm just going to test the water, I'm going
to toe dip and see what happens. And if I don't
(21:28):
like it, I can bail out. As I said, if I was like,
if I rode one waven and then I was like, no, the fear is too
much. I can't handle it. I don't like this. I could have
stopped, right? Like, I didn't have to continue on. And
yes, you could say, like, oh, but you paid for a whole hour session.
Like, who cares, right? Like, this was meant for me to
(21:49):
be like, I want to try a new thing and have a little fun. So
it's like, how can we have more fun with it and
embrace the process and make it a
smaller thing so that we can get past the things that
we might be afraid of and just be
in the experimentation of it and trying it on?
(22:11):
Okay. Now I've said all I want to say about
embracing the process. And so we've talked
about little tweaks, embracing the process. So now I want to talk about getting
back up again. And this one is
definitely key to the frustration, right? So
it's that fear and the frustration, I think, are two of the biggest
(22:33):
obstacles around trying new things. But when we talk about
frustration, this one is real, and I get it.
And I think the embracing the process actually also speaks a lot
to the frustration, overcoming that frustration. But
how do we keep ourselves to keep getting back up? And
with surfing, it was so interesting because
(22:56):
I think about water is such an
unpredictable thing. It's gonna.
The waves are gonna crash over you. They're gonna do whatever they want to do.
And it was definitely such a great meditation
on literally being in the flow. Right? Like,
flowing with the water. Like, how can we
(23:19):
not be fighting with it? Because it definitely
could feel that way sometimes. Or you're like, oh, I have to fight
the waves every time. And it was like, how can I allow
the waves to be doing what they're going to do and I'm going to
navigate that. And so
it was interesting because I actually,
(23:42):
I think it's so easy to get frustrated when you're doing
things like this because it's like, I don't
have that much control and, like, the waves are bigger than I want them to
be. Like, you can create so much, like, so
many things that are. That are
frustrating, right? That are, like, out of your control and annoying
(24:04):
you, and you're like, well, I wanted to do this, but then this is happening.
And, like, it's definitely, I think, a
great practice. And
in terms of letting go and just allowing
yourself to be in that flow. And. And I think that this
is something that is so important, is like, so much of
(24:26):
getting back up again is about the story that you're telling yourself.
And to me, in order to keep going, in order to pick myself
back up, I'm like, it's
allowing. Remember, fear is excitement on
pause. So it's like, how can we lean into the excitement and
the enjoyment of the process
(24:48):
and really embracing the fact that, oh, I
like, every single time I just gotta get back up and give it another
go and not getting hung up and the like,
oh, I'm so bad at this, or I am
not. Well, really, just being
in beginner's mind is really, I think, one of the most important
(25:10):
things. I have a whole separate episode. It's episode 26
on beginner's mind, so definitely check that one out. But what I will
say about it is it's like allowing yourself to be in kind of an
openness to the experience
and not thinking that you have to be perfect.
And I think that this is one of the most important things about being
(25:32):
a great learner, is just embracing your
imperfections and enjoying the
process of doing those little tweaks,
of getting a little bit better and enjoying that process.
And that is what really allows us to keep getting back up again.
That is what allows us to not get overly frustrated.
(25:55):
And every single time it's like, okay, that didn't quite work. Let
me try it again. Let me do it a little bit differently. Navigating
it from that headspace is going to allow you to be like,
okay, this one didn't work, try it again.
And I think that when we feel like we're
(26:15):
not improving is something that can really make us be
like, well, nevermind, throw this out the window. And
to that, I would say,
hmm, what would I say?
(26:39):
And to that, I would ask yourself, like, what is improving?
Because as we do things
repeatedly, we do just naturally improve
from just repetition. And I think that this is
something that can really hold us
back. Is that thing of saying, well, I want to be good
(27:00):
on the first try
sometimes, yes, that's great. Like, it can happen, especially when you do
have translative skills, but it's not always
going to be that way. Right? And sometimes it's like, how can you,
like, feel like, just,
(27:21):
how can you laugh about not being great at something? How can
you embrace the fact that, like, you're trying something new and
give yourself the credit for that alone and then go,
okay, well, if I keep trying it multiple times, like I'm going to to get
better at it. So I think it's more of that mentality
of embracing the fact that, like, you might not be
(27:43):
the best at day one, but you will improve over
time. And seeing, like, is this something I even want
to improve in? You know, you're. Again, it is just an
experiment. And, like, allowing yourself
to test it out multiple times in whatever it is that
you're doing. And then seeing, like, do I like this? Do I not?
(28:05):
And if you don't, that's okay. Like, try something else. Right.
I also like to think of it as, like, it's interesting because it's like,
there's so many, like, related things
and, you know, in terms of, like, physical activity, right.
There's. I personally, I'm doing, like, yoga, acro yoga, like,
you know, but then there's rock climbing and surfing and, like, skateboarding and
(28:28):
snowboarding. You know, there's so many different things. And it's like, you
get to figure out which one of those you actually enjoy. If we're talking
about creativity, it's like, you can paint, you can draw, you can
sew. There's so many different methodologies.
I also like to see it as under this
umbrella here are all these different options. Do any of them speak to me?
(28:51):
Do I want to try them out? And allowing yourself to have
fun with testing out different things that are under the same
umbrella and. And maybe some of those are going to
resonate with you, and some of them, you're going to be like, God damn, I
did not enjoy that. And that's perfectly fine.
So to me, around getting back up again,
(29:12):
it's like, all right, maybe the tweak is actually that you, like, want to try
a different type of something in that umbrella,
right? That can also be one thing where you're like, okay, I'm going to,
like, shift over here and give that a try. But it's all
about allowing ourselves to be in the process and trying again
and trying again and picking ourselves back up instead of saying
(29:34):
like, oh, like, I, none of this is ever going to work, and throwing it
out the window. It's like if you have some kind of inclination
that you want to try and go in a direction, if you're like, well, I
want to do something creative, I don't know what that looks like.
Well, maybe it is that, like, the first one that you pick up is not
going to be for you. And you're like, oh, like, what is something that could
(29:56):
be more? And really, I would say looking for those
translative skills is really helpful at the end of the day, you
know, I generally love to do things. Like,
I love to work with my hands. So it's like, I really like
baking. And therefore, like, pottery came kind of, like, naturally to me because
it's like a similar kind of tactile type of
(30:18):
medium. Right. And so I would say, like, for you, it's
like asking yourself, like, what are the things that
I do enjoy? And finding things that, like,
under this umbrella that kind of fit into, like, things that you
naturally are interested in allows
you to kind of enjoy the process more.
(30:40):
So these are some of my thoughts around
becoming a
so these are some of my thoughts around becoming a better learner. So,
to me, learning is all about making those little tweaks,
embracing the whole process, and learning
to get back up again. And so
(31:03):
did I say everything I want to say around getting back up again?
Oh,
and the last thing I want to say about getting back up again is
(31:25):
in the learning process, you might get knocked around a bit. And, you
know, surfing definitely taught me that. I got thrown into the water in so
many ways that I definitely swallowed a lot of
salt water while I was there. But to me, it's
like, how can we kind of
know that going in, right? Know that, like, not everything's going to go
(31:47):
perfectly, especially at the very beginning stages,
but everyone has to start somewhere. You know, no
one. Like, yes, there are people that are like savants at
things, but we all start somewhere. You know, I had to start
at episode one of my podcast. You know,
I had to go through getting thrown into the water in a million different
(32:09):
ways in the process of learning to surface. So it's
like allowing yourself to know that, like, okay, it might be a little
rocky at the beginning, but I
am going to embrace the fact that that is part of the
process.
(32:29):
Okay.
Okay. So those are my thoughts on what has
helped me become a better learner. And
I hope you enjoyed some of my anecdotes around learning how to surf,
because let me tell you, it was quite the experience. And side note, I've been
(32:50):
watching the Olympians do. Oh, maybe I
won't mention that because this timing is going to be much later than this.
I'm not going to mention that. Oh, no, I will. And side
note, I was watching the Olympics and the people that
are surfing these intense, massive waves.
I'm like, good for them. What an incredible thing to be doing.
(33:12):
I cannot imagine it. But, you know, I imagine
that some of them had. They also had to start
somewhere. So, remember, for everyone
that has become, like, these incredible
amazing Olympians or artists or whatever the case may
be, they all had to start somewhere. And so it's like,
(33:35):
the only way that we're going to find the thing that really suits
us, the thing that we really want to grow with, is by
embracing the beginning of just learning,
is by embracing the process of learning. And so that
is what this episode is all about. And I hope it's been helpful. I
(33:57):
hope you will go out there and take on a new hobby
or. No. And I hope that
you enjoyed this episode and you're going to take on a new skill or try
something different that you haven't done before and
enjoy the process of learning again. Because unlike
my former belief that was after I turn, like, 26,
(34:19):
I'll never be able to learn again. I will tell you, I've been learning all
kinds of things, and because of all of the thoughts
and the things that I've shared in this episode, learning has
become one of my absolute favorite things to do. And
I'm, like, constantly picking up new things. Like, everyone around me is
like, Jess, how do you do so many different things or try all these different
(34:41):
things? It's because I just love it. And so I hope that
you can find a little more love for being a beginner, of trying
something new and enjoying the process.
Okay. Why are we.
Are we good? Okay.
(35:05):
And if you need help with starting off and
figuring out what that new skill might be, or embracing that
process and moving forward in terms of building your own creative
career, then book a free sales call with me. Link is in the show
notes, and I would be delighted in helping you on your journey.
And until next time, I
(35:29):
so thank you so much for listening and tuning
in, and I will. Let me say that again,
and thank you so much for tuning into this episode, and I
will see you in the next one.
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