Survival Mode Is Not Your Story: How to Reset and Dream with God Again [Summer Throwback]

In this special Summer Throwback episode of Priorities on Purpose, you’ll hear a portion of Day One from my Operation Reset Workshop—a free 5-day training designed to help you reclaim your time, realign your priorities, and start living with intention, peace, and purpose.

We’re diving deep into the reality of survival mode—how it sneaks up on us, why it keeps us stuck, and the powerful steps you can take to shift into living fully in the purpose God created you for.

I’ll walk you through reflective questions Jesus Himself asked in Scripture (“What do you want?”) and show you how identifying your dreams, values, and priorities is the foundation for building the life you long for. This is your invitation to get honest about what matters most, stop living on the hamster wheel, and begin dreaming again.

🎯 If you’re ready to stop just existing and start living a life that reflects your deepest values, today’s episode will give you the reset you’ve been craving.

Key Takeaways:

• [00:02] - Welcome & Summer Throwback Introduction Why I’m sharing Day One of the Operation Reset Workshop and how you can access the full 5-day experience.

• [02:05] - Why Knowing Your Priorities Matters How identifying what truly matters impacts your time, boundaries, and daily decisions.

• [05:10] - The “Shipwreck” Analogy How life’s disruptions push us into survival mode and create unhealthy coping mechanisms that become long-term habits.

• [12:45] - Jesus’ Question: “What Do You Want?” Why God cares about your dreams and how to bring them honestly before Him—even if you’re unsure what they are.

• [18:20] - The 10-Year Perspective Exercise How imagining your life and relationships a decade from now can guide the choices you make today.

• [25:00] - The “Why” Exercise How asking yourself “why” (at least seven times) reveals the deep, emotional drivers that will keep you focused when distractions come.

• [31:00] - Final Encouragement & Looking Ahead to Day Two Why being intentional shortens the time you stay in survival mode and what to expect next in the workshop.

🌟 Ready for Your Own Reset? 🌟 Get the full Operation Reset Workshop (all five days + printable workbook) for free here: www.melissabatt.com/operation-reset

🔥 Need accountability to follow through? Upgrade to VIP for 14 days of personal coaching, voice memo check-ins, and encouragement from me: Operation Reset VIP Upgrade

Connect with Melissa:

• Website: melissabatt.com

• Instagram: @melissabattofficial

Episode Transcript

(00:00):
Hey.

(00:00):
Hey friends.
Welcome back to another episode of Priorities On Purpose.
Listen, today's episode is a little different.
I'm sharing part of day one from my Operation Reset Workshop.
This workshop is all about helping you reclaim your time, realign your priorities, and start living with more.
Purpose and peace.
What you're gonna hear today is just a portion of day one, but you can get the full workshop, the free printable workbook, and all five days of training.

(00:27):
When you sign up, on the website.
You can go to www.melissabat.com/operation
reset.
I'll also have a link in the show notes so you can just.
Click and go.
Also if you want to make sure you actually follow through, I highly recommend upgrading to VIP.

(00:47):
It's a special level where I get to walk with you through the workshop.
You get 14 full days of personal accountability with me.
We do voice memo check-ins, encouragement and coaching.
So you're not just learning the steps, you are taking action and doing the steps.

(01:10):
Okay, so again.
You can do operation Reset on your own completely for free.
You're gonna want the workbook, you're gonna wanna follow through with all the things.
If you struggle and need accountability, I don't want this to be something where you're just consuming the information.
I want you to actually do the steps.
So if you need help with that.

(01:31):
Listen, that's where I come in.
It's what I do and I love doing it.
So get the full 14 days of personal accountability with me when you sign up as a VIP. 28 00:01:45,16.36363636 --> 00:01:52,636.36363636 Hey there, I'm Melissa Bat, the host of Priorities on Purpose, a podcast for overwhelmed women who are tired of going through the motions. 29 00:01:53,556.36363636 --> 00:02:03,836.36363636 There has to be more to this light than the cycle of numbing out, scrolling social media, exhausting yourself with a never ending to-do list and still feeling like a failure. 30 00:02:04,16.36363636 --> 00:02:11,996.36363636 At the end of the day, you have hope that tomorrow will be different, and I'm here to help you make sure that it actually is. 31 00:02:12,736.36363636 --> 00:02:14,996.36363636 I'm a Christian life coach and on this podcast. 32 00:02:15,811.36363636 --> 00:02:24,751.36363636 We talk all about intentional living, mental health struggles and tangible ways to be the best versions of ourselves with Jesus at the center. 33 00:02:25,471.36363636 --> 00:02:37,151.36363636 I promise to be your hype girl and biggest cheerleader as I share simple strategies to help you get out of your rut, eliminate distractions, and live the life you are created for. 34 00:02:38,171.36363636 --> 00:02:44,556.36363636 Are you ready to go beyond existing and learn how to truly live? Put your earbuds in and let's get to it, friend. 35 00:02:45,556.36363636 --> 00:02:45,776.36363636 Hey. 36 00:02:45,796.36363636 --> 00:02:46,296.36363636 Hey friends. 37 00:02:46,366.36363636 --> 00:02:48,976.36363636 Welcome to day one of Operation Reset. 38 00:02:49,276.36363636 --> 00:02:57,416.36363636 We are officially doing this thing and I'm so excited that you are partnering with me in this free workshop. 39 00:02:57,896.36363636 --> 00:03:01,166.36363636 we're talking a lot about how we manage our time. 40 00:03:02,36.36363636 --> 00:03:06,56.36363636 And our priorities during Operation Reset. 41 00:03:06,636.36363636 --> 00:03:15,96.36363636 Um,, And there's a big piece to this and that is knowing what matters and what your priorities are. 42 00:03:15,406.36363636 --> 00:03:21,536.36363636 Knowing those two things really, really, really matters when it comes to time management. 43 00:03:22,116.36363636 --> 00:03:30,931.36363636 It's a huge piece of protecting your time because if you don't know what's important, you don't know why you need to protect your time. 44 00:03:31,31.36363636 --> 00:03:43,801.36363636 You could be doing anything that you wanna do, right? And also when we get into coping mechanisms and why we may need to quit unhealthy habits or. 45 00:03:45,876.36363636 --> 00:03:52,56.36363636 Create better boundaries around things like knowing your priorities and what you want in your life. 46 00:03:52,606.36363636 --> 00:03:55,56.36363636 It's really going to matter. 47 00:03:55,286.36363636 --> 00:03:57,416.36363636 Okay? And so we have to spend time on this. 48 00:03:57,486.36363636 --> 00:04:13,666.36363636 Do you know already? And if you do, if you know your priorities, the question then is does your life and the way you spend your time reflect it? We can say God first, family second, and then work all day long. 49 00:04:13,806.36363636 --> 00:04:24,626.36363636 But it doesn't mean our life reflects it because a lot of times we know it up here, but our actions are different because again, something's out of alignment. 50 00:04:25,576.36363636 --> 00:04:35,376.36363636 When we think about that we may sometimes cringe and we may be like, oh, like how did I get things so outta whack for the record, it happens to every single one of us. 51 00:04:35,796.36363636 --> 00:04:38,296.36363636 The fact that you recognize it is a big deal. 52 00:04:38,376.36363636 --> 00:04:40,866.36363636 Okay? But here is why it happens. 53 00:04:41,126.36363636 --> 00:04:44,316.36363636 I'm gonna talk to you about this idea of being shipwrecked. 54 00:04:44,346.36363636 --> 00:04:53,786.36363636 Okay? This is why I believe that things get misaligned and we start doing things that really don't reflect our priorities. 55 00:04:54,506.36363636 --> 00:04:56,866.36363636 I want you to think about being on a boat. 56 00:04:57,146.36363636 --> 00:05:04,686.36363636 You're going on a trip, okay? and you're on this cruise ship and you're so excited, you know where you're going. 57 00:05:04,936.36363636 --> 00:05:07,606.36363636 Maybe you're going to The Bahamas, you're packed for it. 58 00:05:07,906.36363636 --> 00:05:17,606.36363636 You have an itinerary and you're on your way, and then something happens on the boat and um, it capsizes, okay, something happens. 59 00:05:18,226.36363636 --> 00:05:19,726.36363636 You go overboard. 60 00:05:20,276.36363636 --> 00:05:22,486.36363636 This is what I think happens in life because. 61 00:05:23,666.36363636 --> 00:05:29,646.36363636 We have a plan at some point, like we, we had something going on, even us who fly by the seat of our pants. 62 00:05:29,646.36363636 --> 00:05:41,856.36363636 Naturally, we kind of knew we want a good, good life, we want a happy marriage, or like we want to raise our kids a certain way, we, we know those kind of things, but then we stop living like that. 63 00:05:42,476.36363636 --> 00:05:45,16.36363636 Not intentionally, it's just like a little bit of things at a time. 64 00:05:45,36.36363636 --> 00:06:06,606.36363636 But here's what I think happens when the boat capsizes and we get knocked off the boat and we're in the water, we go into survival mode, right? We start picking up these coping mechanisms like we're just waiting in the water, waiting for someone to come and get us. 65 00:06:06,936.36363636 --> 00:06:09,926.36363636 We're not trying to get to shore. 66 00:06:10,336.36363636 --> 00:06:12,456.36363636 We're just, we're on the hamster wheel. 67 00:06:12,456.36363636 --> 00:06:14,526.36363636 We're just like, wa water, just. 68 00:06:15,151.36363636 --> 00:06:18,361.36363636 Just trying to stay afloat instead of drown. 69 00:06:18,731.36363636 --> 00:06:22,161.36363636 Maybe there's something in the water and we're just trying to get to it. 70 00:06:22,251.36363636 --> 00:06:27,641.36363636 We're just surviving friends and I think that is what happens in our life. 71 00:06:28,111.36363636 --> 00:06:36,281.36363636 It's something that is meant to help us get through a hard time, and it's supposed to last for a short. 72 00:06:36,856.36363636 --> 00:06:37,466.36363636 Timeframe. 73 00:06:37,566.36363636 --> 00:06:39,756.36363636 Short time, not long term. 74 00:06:40,216.36363636 --> 00:06:53,876.36363636 And the next thing you know, it's been years and we have taken those coping mechanisms from just trying to stay afloat and have lived our life. 75 00:06:53,926.36363636 --> 00:06:55,956.36363636 Those have become our habits. 76 00:06:56,736.36363636 --> 00:06:59,836.36363636 Not healthy habits, but just surviving habits. 77 00:07:00,96.36363636 --> 00:07:02,156.36363636 You may know some of these off the top of your head. 78 00:07:02,256.36363636 --> 00:07:03,916.36363636 We do this in a lot of ways. 79 00:07:04,216.36363636 --> 00:07:09,726.36363636 We and work, we go into performance and striving and chasing success. 80 00:07:09,986.36363636 --> 00:07:11,726.36363636 We do this in relationships. 81 00:07:12,346.36363636 --> 00:07:13,956.36363636 We do depending on. 82 00:07:15,181.36363636 --> 00:07:20,521.36363636 How we've been raised and trauma that we may have endured as a child, like we do different things. 83 00:07:20,571.36363636 --> 00:07:25,741.36363636 Some of my coping mechanisms, definitely social media, eating my feelings. 84 00:07:26,461.36363636 --> 00:07:37,111.36363636 I've over volunteered overworked, like anything I can do to pretend like everything's great when it's really not, because facing the hard. 85 00:07:37,736.36363636 --> 00:07:42,236.36363636 And looking at it for what it actually is was too much for me. 86 00:07:42,736.36363636 --> 00:07:46,216.36363636 And so when we get in that place, we don't recognize it. 87 00:07:46,216.36363636 --> 00:07:47,456.36363636 And we don't do it intentionally. 88 00:07:47,626.36363636 --> 00:07:49,456.36363636 Again, we're just trying to survive. 89 00:07:49,756.36363636 --> 00:07:51,816.36363636 And that's how we end up on this hamster wheel. 90 00:07:51,986.36363636 --> 00:07:55,466.36363636 We're on this hamster wheel just doing live, doing the same thing over and over. 91 00:07:55,596.36363636 --> 00:07:56,826.36363636 We're not going anywhere. 92 00:07:57,6.36363636 --> 00:07:58,66.36363636 We don't have a plan. 93 00:07:58,556.36363636 --> 00:07:59,626.36363636 We're just trying to. 94 00:08:00,206.36363636 --> 00:08:00,826.36363636 To survive. 95 00:08:01,446.36363636 --> 00:08:04,626.36363636 God does not want you to just survive. 96 00:08:05,166.36363636 --> 00:08:07,906.36363636 He does not want you to just exist. 97 00:08:08,526.36363636 --> 00:08:14,346.36363636 You are created for a purpose and with a plan, and you have a mission. 98 00:08:14,966.36363636 --> 00:08:16,426.36363636 He wants you to truly live. 99 00:08:16,926.36363636 --> 00:08:18,706.36363636 He doesn't want you to survive. 100 00:08:18,846.36363636 --> 00:08:19,826.36363636 He wants you to thrive. 101 00:08:20,236.36363636 --> 00:08:34,496.36363636 And so before we do that we are going to look at a few things because depending on how long you've been in survival mode, you may have forgotten about what you want or what your dreams are and that kind of stuff. 102 00:08:34,526.36363636 --> 00:08:34,816.36363636 Okay. 103 00:08:36,151.36363636 --> 00:08:51,971.36363636 Again, real quick, now that I'm back to my notes, sometimes coping mechanisms will look like binging Netflix, like I said, reading books, overcommitting over volunteering, overshopping eating too much. 104 00:08:52,161.36363636 --> 00:08:55,81.36363636 There's so many different ways that we do this. 105 00:08:55,861.36363636 --> 00:09:09,511.36363636 Somehow what was meant to help us get through in the short term becomes our new normal in life until something causes us to recognize things aren't great and it has a searching for. 106 00:09:10,311.36363636 --> 00:09:10,911.36363636 A reset. 107 00:09:11,611.36363636 --> 00:09:27,991.36363636 And this my friends, this is your reset, and so we're considering this day one, it's a day to switch things up to dream again and consider what you want just in case things have changed. 108 00:09:28,581.36363636 --> 00:09:34,391.36363636 Some of you have been in survival mode for so long that you may not. 109 00:09:35,641.36363636 --> 00:09:41,851.36363636 Have ever answered the questions that I'm gonna be asking you? Some of you guys may not be in survival mode at all. 110 00:09:42,101.36363636 --> 00:09:44,251.36363636 Again, do not skip past this part. 111 00:09:44,621.36363636 --> 00:09:45,971.36363636 Stick with me, friend. 112 00:09:46,121.36363636 --> 00:09:46,411.36363636 Okay. 113 00:09:46,411.36363636 --> 00:09:47,91.36363636 Stick with me. 114 00:09:47,341.36363636 --> 00:09:47,931.36363636 Pinky promise. 115 00:09:48,481.36363636 --> 00:09:52,761.36363636 Questions to help you know where you are going and what's important to you. 116 00:09:54,621.36363636 --> 00:10:03,421.36363636 Not too long ago, I was reading my Bible in the book of Mark and something like just, I don't know, for weeks, I just kept seeing it over and over. 117 00:10:03,881.36363636 --> 00:10:17,431.36363636 And it was this idea where Jesus was asking in scripture, what do you want? And I felt like during my prayer time and when I was journaling, I felt like God was asking me, what do you want? And I, I don't know. 118 00:10:18,686.36363636 --> 00:10:26,216.36363636 That I had ever answered that boldly with conviction, and honestly, I don't even know that I knew what I wanted. 119 00:10:26,816.36363636 --> 00:10:28,736.36363636 I had to journal through that and I was like. 120 00:10:30,171.36363636 --> 00:10:41,561.36363636 What do I want? And so several times in the New Testament, Jesus asks people what they want, and I want you to know that Jesus cares about what you want. 121 00:10:41,661.36363636 --> 00:10:48,861.36363636 So many times we're like, he doesn't care about my hopes and my dreams, like I just need to read my Bible and do good things. 122 00:10:49,311.36363636 --> 00:10:50,261.36363636 Jesus cares. 123 00:10:50,401.36363636 --> 00:10:51,581.36363636 He, he cares. 124 00:10:51,581.36363636 --> 00:10:53,341.36363636 He wants to partner with you in it. 125 00:10:53,601.36363636 --> 00:10:56,61.36363636 God created you with a purpose. 126 00:10:56,201.36363636 --> 00:10:57,701.36363636 You don't think he gave you those dreams. 127 00:10:58,81.36363636 --> 00:10:59,501.36363636 He totally gave you those dreams. 128 00:10:59,691.36363636 --> 00:11:06,71.36363636 Depending on what the dreams are, of course, if you're dreaming about having affairs, maybe not those dreams, right? So again. 129 00:11:06,556.36363636 --> 00:11:12,786.36363636 Jesus wants to partner with you in those dreams and he wants you to share those with him. 130 00:11:13,406.36363636 --> 00:11:16,46.36363636 Some of you, first of all haven't dreamed and you don't even know what you want. 131 00:11:16,506.36363636 --> 00:11:25,586.36363636 I wanna challenge you to get quiet and become still in a place where you can just ask yourself, what do I want? Help me figure out what I want. 132 00:11:25,776.36363636 --> 00:11:35,146.36363636 Pray that prayer and say, God, help me know, like, what do I want? Because some of you have been, again, that's a great sign that you're in survival mode if you don't know what you want. 133 00:11:35,806.36363636 --> 00:11:41,416.36363636 More than likely you've been in survival mode probably recently, maybe your whole entire life. 134 00:11:41,836.36363636 --> 00:11:47,496.36363636 And it's gonna take some getting quiet to really press in just with that. 135 00:11:47,516.36363636 --> 00:11:49,336.36363636 And that's gonna be a challenge for you. 136 00:11:49,696.36363636 --> 00:11:53,616.36363636 I want to challenge you to stick with me, lean in and. 137 00:11:54,481.36363636 --> 00:11:57,191.36363636 Don't be afraid of not knowing what you want. 138 00:11:57,241.36363636 --> 00:12:02,731.36363636 Another question that you can always ask is, what do I not want? Sometimes that question's easier. 139 00:12:03,61.36363636 --> 00:12:03,901.36363636 I don't wanna be divorced. 140 00:12:04,341.36363636 --> 00:12:08,101.36363636 I don't want kids that are deadbeats and don't do anything. 141 00:12:08,381.36363636 --> 00:12:09,661.36363636 I don't want kids that are on drugs. 142 00:12:09,941.36363636 --> 00:12:11,661.36363636 I don't want kids with mental health problems. 143 00:12:11,711.36363636 --> 00:12:13,681.36363636 There's lots of things that we don't want. 144 00:12:13,701.36363636 --> 00:12:15,201.36363636 So if you can't think of what you want. 145 00:12:15,866.36363636 --> 00:12:19,916.36363636 Pray about that, and in the meantime, make a list of the things that you don't want. 146 00:12:20,146.36363636 --> 00:12:24,466.36363636 Okay? What do you want? Again, Jesus asked this several times. 147 00:12:24,846.36363636 --> 00:12:31,876.36363636 In Mark 10 53, the blind beggar, and he is asking like, Hey, over here, over here. 148 00:12:32,566.36363636 --> 00:12:40,556.36363636 Jesus says, what do you want me to do for you? He asks to be able to see and God immediately heals him. 149 00:12:41,146.36363636 --> 00:12:44,956.36363636 Some of you, Jesus is asking you what you want and you don't know the answer. 150 00:12:45,136.36363636 --> 00:12:54,316.36363636 And again, lean into that and recognize that Jesus he wants to partner with you in it and he wants you to become clear on what you want. 151 00:12:55,621.36363636 --> 00:13:04,281.36363636 So Jesus invites us to lean in to our deepest desires and to name them honestly before him. 152 00:13:04,701.36363636 --> 00:13:08,981.36363636 The other thing to know, there's another time when I believe it's James and John. 153 00:13:09,391.36363636 --> 00:13:12,141.36363636 James and John, I'm like, Hey, Jesus, come over here. 154 00:13:12,141.36363636 --> 00:13:13,821.36363636 They're a couple of his disciples. 155 00:13:13,841.36363636 --> 00:13:18,991.36363636 And he's will you do anything that we ask? Or something like that? And Jesus says. 156 00:13:19,376.36363636 --> 00:13:22,866.36363636 What do you want? And they say they want power. 157 00:13:22,936.36363636 --> 00:13:25,746.36363636 They wanna sit next to him in heaven. 158 00:13:26,246.36363636 --> 00:13:38,256.36363636 And at that time, even though what they wanted wasn't in alignment with what God wanted for them, Jesus still was very compassionate and he met them right where they were. 159 00:13:38,396.36363636 --> 00:13:38,896.36363636 He says. 160 00:13:39,586.36363636 --> 00:13:40,926.36363636 You don't even know what you're asking. 161 00:13:41,506.36363636 --> 00:13:55,676.36363636 And so again I wanna challenge you no matter what it is that you think you want, even if it is power, talk to God about it so that he can help you get things in alignment if it's not in alignment. 162 00:13:56,816.36363636 --> 00:14:02,356.36363636 All right, so we are going to talk about audacious dreams. 163 00:14:03,466.36363636 --> 00:14:10,781.36363636 When was the last time that you dreamed about your future? Again, survival mode and dreaming. 164 00:14:10,871.36363636 --> 00:14:12,941.36363636 Those two things don't typically go together. 165 00:14:13,201.36363636 --> 00:14:17,381.36363636 So if it's been a while since you dreamed, that's okay. 166 00:14:17,381.36363636 --> 00:14:21,901.36363636 It probably means you've been in survival mode today, you are gonna get to dream again. 167 00:14:22,441.36363636 --> 00:14:23,741.36363636 The sky is the limit. 168 00:14:23,921.36363636 --> 00:14:26,581.36363636 We serve a God that's so good and he loves you. 169 00:14:26,961.36363636 --> 00:14:29,181.36363636 He wants what's best for you. 170 00:14:29,441.36363636 --> 00:14:32,341.36363636 And so I want you to think about like the dream. 171 00:14:33,76.36363636 --> 00:14:57,126.36363636 What do you want? What values are important to you? How do you live them out on a daily and weekly basis? And at the end of your life, what do you want to be remembered for? What do you want those closest to you to say about you? How do you want them to remember you? And now I wanna pause like you're gonna get out your workbook and you're going to do this little exercise with me. 172 00:14:57,156.36363636 --> 00:15:08,406.36363636 Okay? When I was in direct sales, I was at a top leader retreat, and at the time I believe it was probably 2013 and I had four children. 173 00:15:09,871.36363636 --> 00:15:13,51.36363636 And 20 and what is that, 12 years ago? I think so. 174 00:15:13,51.36363636 --> 00:15:13,891.36363636 12 years ago. 175 00:15:14,361.36363636 --> 00:15:14,651.36363636 Gosh. 176 00:15:14,961.36363636 --> 00:15:18,211.36363636 Totally different age than what my kids are today. 177 00:15:18,781.36363636 --> 00:15:23,91.36363636 Today I have a 23-year-old, a 21-year-old who just got married. 178 00:15:23,191.36363636 --> 00:15:30,531.36363636 My 23-year-old is engaged in getting married next year, and I have a 13-year-old and a 16-year-old. 179 00:15:30,561.36363636 --> 00:15:30,851.36363636 Okay. 180 00:15:31,321.36363636 --> 00:15:34,291.36363636 When I did this exercise for the first time. 181 00:15:34,971.36363636 --> 00:15:36,201.36363636 Again, 12 years ago. 182 00:15:36,741.36363636 --> 00:15:43,641.36363636 My kids are now at the age of where they were when I did this exercise. 183 00:15:43,641.36363636 --> 00:15:44,881.36363636 They're older actually. 184 00:15:45,101.36363636 --> 00:15:54,891.36363636 And so I want you to write yourself down, write your name and then how old you are, and then write the ages of your kids. 185 00:15:55,551.36363636 --> 00:15:59,51.36363636 If you got one kid, you got four kids, write them all down. 186 00:15:59,751.36363636 --> 00:16:15,381.36363636 And then, how old are they if I didn't tell you that? If you're married, who? Who's that person? How old are they? Are there other people that are important in your life? Maybe you don't have kids, but your mother is still alive, or your grandparents still alive. 187 00:16:15,431.36363636 --> 00:16:19,861.36363636 Write those names down and if you know how old they are, write their ages down. 188 00:16:21,121.36363636 --> 00:16:25,471.36363636 Maybe you have a grandchild or a nephew, anyone that's important to you. 189 00:16:26,111.36363636 --> 00:16:31,351.36363636 I want you to write the names of those people that you have those relationships with. 190 00:16:31,891.36363636 --> 00:16:34,551.36363636 And then I want you to, again, list their ages. 191 00:16:34,611.36363636 --> 00:16:36,871.36363636 And then I want you to think about 10 years from now. 192 00:16:38,211.36363636 --> 00:17:06,171.3636364 In 10 years, how old will everybody be? How old will you be? How old will they be? Do you have hopes and dreams for them? Especially if you have a spouse and kids, right? How do you want them to be living in 10 years? I don't know about you, but I know for me, I have a lot of prayers and high hopes for myself and the people that are in my life. 193 00:17:06,831.3636364 --> 00:17:22,201.3636364 Do I want them walking with Jesus? Do I wanna have a happy, healthy marriage? Do I wanna be outta debt? Do I want my kids to be living for Jesus? I have all of those things that I have written down for myself. 194 00:17:23,21.3636364 --> 00:17:31,691.3636364 And now I want you to ask yourself, is the life that I'm living today. 195 00:17:33,361.3636364 --> 00:17:36,271.3636364 Going to help them get there. 196 00:17:36,331.3636364 --> 00:17:45,171.3636364 What am I doing to impact that? Because yes, everything's not your responsibility, but I believe we do have impact. 197 00:17:45,271.3636364 --> 00:17:56,481.3636364 And for your spouse, if you want a healthy marriage that's gonna take your you're doing a little bit of work, right? Your children, you want them to grow up and know Jesus. 198 00:17:57,681.3636364 --> 00:18:23,21.3636364 Are you reading the Bible with them? Are you taking them to church? Are you having conversations with them that are hard, when something bad happens or when they see something on TV that doesn't really reflect your values? Are you having those kind of conversations? Are you talking to them about different opportunities? Are you talking about your own walk with God? Same thing with getting outta debt. 199 00:18:23,21.3636364 --> 00:18:23,981.3636364 Maybe you wanna be debt free. 200 00:18:24,11.3636364 --> 00:18:46,101.3636364 Are you still using the credit card? Girl? If you're still using the credit card, that is not gonna help you be debt free, right? We have to look at these things to see am I living the life today that's gonna help me become the person that I need to be to live these things out, or, to impact those that are in my life? And here's just some of my. 201 00:18:46,771.3636364 --> 00:18:47,441.3636364 Personally. 202 00:18:47,486.3636364 --> 00:18:55,386.3636364 Okay 10 years from now, my youngest child will be 23 years old. 203 00:18:55,916.3636364 --> 00:18:57,146.3636364 She's such a mama's girl. 204 00:18:57,476.3636364 --> 00:18:58,716.3636364 I thought I was done having kids. 205 00:18:58,996.3636364 --> 00:19:03,756.3636364 I end up pregnant and I thought there was no chance I was ever gonna have a girl. 206 00:19:04,16.3636364 --> 00:19:05,516.3636364 And she's a gift. 207 00:19:06,256.3636364 --> 00:19:07,376.3636364 I want her serving God. 208 00:19:07,496.3636364 --> 00:19:09,96.3636364 I want all of my kids serving God. 209 00:19:09,736.3636364 --> 00:19:12,296.3636364 I want them to be confident in their convictions. 210 00:19:12,616.3636364 --> 00:19:15,16.3636364 I want them leading in their life. 211 00:19:15,696.3636364 --> 00:19:18,896.3636364 I want them to come visit home and hang out. 212 00:19:19,436.3636364 --> 00:19:20,236.3636364 I wanna be debt free. 213 00:19:21,276.3636364 --> 00:19:23,596.3636364 I personally want to have written some books. 214 00:19:24,226.3636364 --> 00:19:34,806.3636364 Again, you have to ask yourself like, am I living like that? What am I doing today to get me closer to that? And this is going to help you know where you should spend your time. 215 00:19:34,906.3636364 --> 00:19:52,401.3636364 If those are your goals or your dreams, then what kind of goals can we set in the short term to help us get there? Again, I wanna be happily married and I want us to be having fun and spending time traveling, spending time with our grandkids. 216 00:19:52,521.3636364 --> 00:19:53,881.3636364 I expect grandkids by then. 217 00:19:54,121.3636364 --> 00:19:57,81.3636364 I already have one child married and another one getting married next year. 218 00:19:57,161.3636364 --> 00:19:58,281.3636364 I think 10 years grandchildren. 219 00:19:58,641.3636364 --> 00:19:58,761.3636364 I. 220 00:19:59,446.3636364 --> 00:20:05,6.3636364 Absolutely, and one already moved back to Georgia and I'm in Kentucky, so I am going to be traveling. 221 00:20:05,726.3636364 --> 00:20:16,566.3636364 I want to be financially stable, debt free, able to give freely, serving God, making a positive impact on others as we live out being the hands and feet of Jesus Again. 222 00:20:17,106.3636364 --> 00:20:22,626.3636364 How am I living today? To help me be that person I wanna be running around. 223 00:20:22,866.3636364 --> 00:20:24,946.3636364 I don't wanna be tired, I don't wanna be miserable. 224 00:20:25,66.3636364 --> 00:20:25,946.3636364 I don't wanna be sick. 225 00:20:26,446.3636364 --> 00:20:59,176.3636364 How am I taking care of myself today? Do you have dreams and aspirations when it comes to your finances, your career, your relationships, your personal relationship with God, your health, and what would you wanna do in your life if you were guaranteed success? If the sky is the limit and you could do anything in the world without money being an issue, what would you wanna do? Have you ever asked yourself that question? Now is the time to dream friend. 226 00:20:59,416.3636364 --> 00:21:06,226.3636364 I want you to ask yourself that question what would you want your life to look like? You could just snap your finger and it all happened. 227 00:21:07,16.3636364 --> 00:21:23,266.3636364 What would you want it to look like if money weren't an issue? If you weren't afraid, if you insecurities were no longer a thing and you weren't, afraid that people would look at you weird 'cause you don't talk like certain people or you don't look like certain people. 228 00:21:26,156.3636364 --> 00:21:29,316.3636364 I want you to really take some time to think about that. 229 00:21:29,456.3636364 --> 00:21:41,596.3636364 What do you, what would you want again? Because when we know what we want, we will be a little bit more, um. 230 00:21:43,791.3636364 --> 00:21:47,610.2525253 accepting of the things that it will require. 231 00:21:48,460.2525253 --> 00:21:55,971.2616364 We're gonna do this little y exercise, okay? And this is something that for those who are gonna be doing VIP we're gonna do this exercise together. 232 00:21:56,151.2616364 --> 00:21:59,11.2616364 So VIPs I hope you'll join me. 233 00:21:59,651.2616364 --> 00:22:20,231.2616364 So that we can do this together because I promise you that doing this exercise you can do it on your own, but I promise you that if we do it together, you will get to that gritty place where you're like, Ugh, you want to cry? And I know sometimes we think, I don't wanna cry, I don't wanna cry. 234 00:22:20,351.2616364 --> 00:22:22,711.2616364 I hate crying for the record, but. 235 00:22:24,641.2616364 --> 00:22:37,801.2616364 When there are so many distractions in our life, we have to get super gritty to know that we know where the root is on our why. 236 00:22:37,801.2616364 --> 00:22:41,91.2616364 And so the why exercise, basically, you ask yourself those questions. 237 00:22:41,221.2616364 --> 00:22:42,171.2616364 Money weren't an issue. 238 00:22:42,671.2616364 --> 00:22:44,171.2616364 If fear wasn't an issue, if your. 239 00:22:44,706.2616364 --> 00:22:46,56.2616364 Securities weren't an issue. 240 00:22:46,451.2616364 --> 00:22:54,831.2616364 If literally you could just snap your fingers and do the thing, what would you want to do? And I want you to do this for yourself personally. 241 00:22:55,781.2616364 --> 00:23:04,911.2616364 Okay? Sometimes it's easy for us to think about our kids and our spouse, but I want you to think about this for you. 242 00:23:05,21.2616364 --> 00:23:08,201.2616364 As someone who struggles sometimes with feeling unworthy. 243 00:23:08,991.2616364 --> 00:23:13,761.2616364 Like, I don't feel worthy enough to even recognize what my own dreams are. 244 00:23:13,821.2616364 --> 00:23:17,641.2616364 And so I wanna challenge you to lean into that, even if it's uncomfortable. 245 00:23:17,661.2616364 --> 00:23:20,761.2616364 And ask yourself, what would I want? Don't deflect. 246 00:23:21,311.2616364 --> 00:23:22,641.2616364 Okay, don't deflect. 247 00:23:22,711.2616364 --> 00:23:26,721.2616364 What would you want? And then I want you to ask yourself why. 248 00:23:27,796.2616364 --> 00:23:38,551.2616364 Why do you want that? Why does that matter? Why would it be important? What would it feel like to have that, to be that? Okay. 249 00:23:38,891.2616364 --> 00:23:40,991.2616364 And when you write this, you're gonna write it out on paper. 250 00:23:41,211.2616364 --> 00:23:45,991.2616364 You're gonna write what you want, and then you're gonna ask the why, and then you're gonna write the answer to that. 251 00:23:46,451.2616364 --> 00:23:49,351.2616364 And then you're gonna keep asking yourself why. 252 00:23:49,651.2616364 --> 00:23:59,861.2616364 You have to ask yourself why at least seven times if you still do not have tears after seven times of asking why you're doing it wrong. 253 00:24:00,171.2616364 --> 00:24:06,941.2616364 Okay? I want you to really get into your feelings, and I know some of us have such. 254 00:24:08,296.2616364 --> 00:24:12,166.2616364 We've built up this armor to protect us from feeling emotions. 255 00:24:12,746.2616364 --> 00:24:17,846.2616364 And so the idea of feeling emotions is uncomfortable. 256 00:24:18,106.2616364 --> 00:24:23,486.2616364 And so we wanna do everything to like, can you stay back here? You, I'm not letting you in. 257 00:24:23,586.2616364 --> 00:24:33,646.2616364 Listen, this is between you and God, unless you're VIP and you wanna do this together with me because I would love to do this exercise together, but I want you to ask yourself and sit with it. 258 00:24:34,146.2616364 --> 00:24:46,796.2616364 What's the why? Why does it matter? Why would you want to do this? And, for me personally I can go on and share a little bit of this if you want to continue. 259 00:24:47,196.2616364 --> 00:24:49,26.2616364 Actually, no, maybe I'll go on and tell you. 260 00:24:49,486.2616364 --> 00:24:56,376.2616364 So for me personally when I did this exercise, like I, hold on, maybe I have it. 261 00:24:57,686.2616364 --> 00:24:58,326.2616364 I have the sheets. 262 00:25:00,306.2616364 --> 00:25:01,466.2616364 I did this years ago. 263 00:25:04,86.2616364 --> 00:25:10,356.2616364 I pulled this question from a workshop I did in 2019 because it was so good. 264 00:25:10,596.2616364 --> 00:25:12,276.2616364 I have a mission statement and everything. 265 00:25:12,936.2616364 --> 00:25:14,436.2616364 I'm gonna read it just from here. 266 00:25:14,896.2616364 --> 00:25:18,976.2616364 'Cause I think that will, that'll be very raw and fresh. 267 00:25:20,236.2616364 --> 00:25:29,576.2616364 So speaking life into women to help them overcome obstacles and make a positive impact in their life, family, and community. 268 00:25:31,146.2616364 --> 00:25:35,616.2616364 We'll just, I might cry, but I'm gonna, I'm gonna, I'm gonna try not to for say good time. 269 00:25:35,966.2616364 --> 00:25:36,256.2616364 Okay. 270 00:25:36,276.2616364 --> 00:25:41,576.2616364 So when I ask myself like, why is that matter? It might be like, because I wanna help people. 271 00:25:41,956.2616364 --> 00:25:52,366.2616364 Why do you wanna help people? I wanna help people because, for a long time I wanted a mentor and I had to figure things out on my own, and it took a lot of time. 272 00:25:53,226.2616364 --> 00:26:02,686.2616364 Why? Because I could save a lot of time and heartaches and do a better job than what I've done now. 273 00:26:03,346.2616364 --> 00:26:07,546.2616364 Why? Because I missed a lot of things. 274 00:26:08,786.2616364 --> 00:26:09,486.2616364 I I. 275 00:26:10,421.2616364 --> 00:26:14,371.2616364 Neglected my main priorities and I missed things. 276 00:26:14,571.2616364 --> 00:26:19,801.2616364 I shared a little bit about this in the welcome part, I believe, but I missed some things. 277 00:26:19,921.2616364 --> 00:26:21,961.2616364 I had a kid who was struggling really bad. 278 00:26:22,81.2616364 --> 00:26:27,421.2616364 I like, I remember, worrying that I was gonna find an a, a letter and he was gonna end his life. 279 00:26:27,791.2616364 --> 00:26:36,271.2616364 If you've ever had a child that has struggled with that, man, I don't wish that on anyone, but it was terrifying, and I could have missed that. 280 00:26:37,311.2616364 --> 00:26:41,751.2616364 I assumed everything was okay because on the surface everything looked okay. 281 00:26:42,211.2616364 --> 00:26:43,111.2616364 He was a little angry. 282 00:26:43,391.2616364 --> 00:26:43,511.2616364 I. 283 00:26:44,406.2616364 --> 00:26:46,106.2616364 But it was not okay. 284 00:26:46,396.2616364 --> 00:26:48,316.2616364 Looking like he was successful. 285 00:26:48,496.2616364 --> 00:26:51,916.2616364 He had a girlfriend, he had, he was an athlete. 286 00:26:52,96.2616364 --> 00:26:53,46.2616364 He, he had friends. 287 00:26:53,96.2616364 --> 00:26:58,176.2616364 Everything looked great, but it wasn't, and I could have missed that. 288 00:26:58,196.2616364 --> 00:27:02,576.2616364 And I don't want any other mom to feel what I feel. 289 00:27:03,396.2616364 --> 00:27:05,656.2616364 Or worse, not catch it in time. 290 00:27:06,236.2616364 --> 00:27:11,936.2616364 And so that is one reason why this means so much to me. 291 00:27:12,526.2616364 --> 00:27:23,191.2616364 Another, I have a child who was um, being groomed by a neighbor and I almost missed it. 292 00:27:23,851.2616364 --> 00:27:39,371.2616364 At the time I felt like God wanted me to use my voice and I had been working on this and learning to speak up when it was uncomfortable and in controversy and in conflict and when it was just extremely uncomfortable. 293 00:27:39,611.2616364 --> 00:27:43,331.2616364 I was learning how to advocate for myself and for my kids. 294 00:27:43,591.2616364 --> 00:27:53,501.2616364 And I was able to speak up, but I also know who I was years before, and I'm not sure I would've recognized it. 295 00:27:54,181.2616364 --> 00:27:58,621.2616364 I definitely would not have leaned in to my instincts. 296 00:27:59,121.2616364 --> 00:28:00,481.2616364 I may not have trusted them. 297 00:28:00,761.2616364 --> 00:28:02,241.2616364 I would've thought, oh, that's a good family. 298 00:28:03,51.2616364 --> 00:28:04,381.2616364 They're good Christian people. 299 00:28:04,771.2616364 --> 00:28:06,391.2616364 They, they go to church. 300 00:28:06,471.2616364 --> 00:28:18,41.2616364 They look like, 100% could be on the cover of Christian, world, whatever, like the ideal Christian family. 301 00:28:19,341.2616364 --> 00:28:20,841.2616364 But because I had done the work. 302 00:28:22,151.2616364 --> 00:28:23,531.2616364 And God had walked me through this. 303 00:28:24,171.2616364 --> 00:28:25,891.2616364 I was able to trust my instincts. 304 00:28:26,211.2616364 --> 00:28:28,171.2616364 I was able to ask the questions. 305 00:28:28,731.2616364 --> 00:28:34,111.2616364 I was able to make the decision to acknowledge it. 306 00:28:34,781.2616364 --> 00:28:36,351.2616364 Some people can't even acknowledge it. 307 00:28:36,931.2616364 --> 00:28:39,11.2616364 I made the decision to go to therapy myself. 308 00:28:39,571.2616364 --> 00:28:42,531.2616364 I had to make the decision to move outta that neighborhood. 309 00:28:43,111.2616364 --> 00:28:54,71.2616364 A lot of different things that, if I hadn't done the work that I had done, I may have done differently and our life would be extremely different. 310 00:28:54,611.2616364 --> 00:28:58,311.2616364 And so again, those two very different examples. 311 00:29:00,351.2616364 --> 00:29:06,791.2616364 I want to be the person that can walk along with someone and be like, I know this sucks. 312 00:29:07,471.2616364 --> 00:29:08,871.2616364 I know you're having marriage issues. 313 00:29:08,981.2616364 --> 00:29:10,31.2616364 Like, Let's lean in. 314 00:29:10,51.2616364 --> 00:29:23,931.2616364 How does this make you feel? What's going on? You know, what's the trigger? Where are you being triggered? I just want to be the mentor that I wish I had because I really, really needed it. 315 00:29:24,631.2616364 --> 00:29:26,911.2616364 And, I didn't have it for a really long time. 316 00:29:28,291.2616364 --> 00:29:38,661.2616364 So again the get into the meat of it, the nitty gritty where it hurts and is uncomfortable, that's when you know that you're onto something. 317 00:29:39,701.2616364 --> 00:29:40,391.2616364 That matters. 318 00:29:40,581.2616364 --> 00:29:54,341.2616364 Okay? Once you have that and you know where you're going, distractions are gonna come, but you're gonna stay focused because it matters that much when survival mode happens and you get back in survival mode. 319 00:29:54,341.2616364 --> 00:29:56,861.2616364 Because listen, I've been in survival mode several times since. 320 00:29:57,931.2616364 --> 00:30:03,811.2616364 I started doing this work, but survival mode doesn't last near as long as it used to because I'm intentional now. 321 00:30:03,991.2616364 --> 00:30:04,851.2616364 I'm aware of it. 322 00:30:05,51.2616364 --> 00:30:09,731.2616364 I know what to look for and I know that I can take a day, but I can't take forever. 323 00:30:10,611.2616364 --> 00:30:13,611.2616364 I got to get back to where I'm going. 324 00:30:13,771.2616364 --> 00:30:15,771.2616364 I gotta get back on the path. 325 00:30:16,161.2616364 --> 00:30:19,501.2616364 Sometimes when we're in survival mode, we're just so busy. 326 00:30:20,511.2616364 --> 00:30:50,101.2616364 Trying to pretend like we are not drowning and about to die in the water because, you know, we, we shipwrecked that We don't even recognize the people that are there trying to lend you a hand and help you get back on the boat or to get on a different boat or hand you the life preserver, right? And so again, I just wanna challenge you lean in friend and let's continue this workshop. 327 00:30:50,181.2616364 --> 00:30:51,181.2616364 I know today is hard. 328 00:30:51,741.2616364 --> 00:30:53,781.2616364 Tomorrow it's going to be so much better. 329 00:30:54,1.2616364 --> 00:30:56,781.2616364 I'm going to give you everything I know on time management. 330 00:30:57,111.2616364 --> 00:31:02,781.2616364 We're gonna talk about tracking your time and what you're gonna be doing with your time, because at the end of the day, we all have 24 hours. 331 00:31:02,931.2616364 --> 00:31:06,381.2616364 It's what we do with the 24 hours that matters most. 332 00:31:06,721.2616364 --> 00:31:08,381.2616364 And I have a lot of time hacks. 333 00:31:08,821.2616364 --> 00:31:13,221.2616364 A lot of people say they, they can't do one-on-one coaching because they don't have time. 334 00:31:14,291.2616364 --> 00:31:27,51.2616364 What I will tell you is those who work with me, they save time because I give them so many tips that will save them time that they get hours back from the hour they put in working with me. 335 00:31:27,311.2616364 --> 00:31:33,61.2616364 Again, off on a rabbit trail here, but looking forward to day two is gonna be awesome. 336 00:31:33,411.2616364 --> 00:31:34,141.2616364 I'll see you then. 337 00:31:35,105.3759919 --> 00:31:35,605.3759919 Hey friends. 338 00:31:35,825.3759919 --> 00:31:37,125.3759919 That's it for this episode. 339 00:31:37,185.3759919 --> 00:31:41,45.3759919 If you found value, I would love it if you could take a couple of seconds and leave me a quick review. 340 00:31:41,175.3759919 --> 00:31:46,445.3759919 While it may seem super simple, it is so beneficial and gives me the opportunity to help more women. 341 00:31:46,795.3759919 --> 00:31:50,245.3759919 Also take a screenshot and share it on social media with your biggest aha today. 342 00:31:50,655.3759919 --> 00:31:53,965.3759919 Don't forget to tag me at Melissa Bat Official so we can connect. 343 00:31:54,315.3759919 --> 00:32:01,0.3759919 Thank you so much for listening, and until next time, friend, keep walking it out one baby step at a time because God's got you.