Are you a homeschool mom navigating the rollercoaster of hormones—both yours and your teen’s? Kristi Clover sits down with Monica Swanson (homeschool mom of four boys, author, and speaker) to talk openly about perimenopause, homeschooling through hormonal changes, and raising teens with grace. Discover real-life tips for staying grounded, practical strategies for keeping the peace at home, and encouragement to connect with your kids even when tempers flare. Whether you’re dealing with brain fog, “frozen shoulder,” or high-emotion days, you’re not alone! Dive into this honest and uplifting conversation geared for Christian homeschool moms navigating midlife and motherhood.
What you’ll discover:
1. Navigating perimenopause as a homeschool mom
2. Helping teens through hormonal changes
3. Staying spiritually grounded in hard seasons
4. Fun, practical ways to connect in the chaos
5. "Don't be silent, don't suffer quietly. Talk to somebody and talk to your husband."
Recommended Resources:
- Monica Swanson Podcast
- Raising Amazing, by Monica Swanson
- Boy Mom, by Monica Swanson
- Becoming Homeschoolers, by Monica Swanson
- Character Training Course
- Women’s Wellness Series
- 3 Day Homeschool Reset
- Ultimate Homeschool Organization Course(Get a $30 Coupon Here)
- More from Monica Swanson on the Schoolhouse Rocked Podcast
- More from Kristi Clover on the Schoolhouse Rocked Podcast
Chapters:
02:39 Homeschooling Happens in Real Life
02:54 Navigating Perimenopause While Homeschooling
04:11 I Wasn't Prepared! Nobody Talked About Perimenopause
06:17 Perimenopause and Frozen Shoulder
07:31 Perimenopause and Rising Divorce Rates
08:40 Navigating Teenage Hormones and Homeschooling
09:42 Our Teens Need Our Love and Support
10:03 Physical Activity is Crucial for Kids' Mental Health and Development
14:09 How Can We Turn Conflicts Into Opportunities to Connect With Our Kids?
14:28 Using Activity as an Opportunity for Connection and Conflict Resolution
17:06 Practical Advice for Staying Calm During Conflict
21:25 Practical Tips for Managing Perimenopause/Menopause
We want to hear from you! Is there a guest you’d like to hear from or a subject you’d like us to discuss on the podcast? How can we be praying for you? Talk to us here.
Sponsors:
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
(00:00):
Spending time with the Lord, really bringing things to the
Lord specifically and and acknowledging the areas that you
are struggling the most and justbeing able to be really real and
say God, you know, you made me, you know what's going on in my
heart, in my mind, you know everything on my plate.
You know my concerns, my anxieties.
Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by
(00:20):
prayer and petition with Thanksgiving.
So truly coming to God and saying I'm going to give you my
cares, I'm going to give you my anxieties.
I really need your peace and to just recognize that He is a
practical God. He will meet you where you are.
Hello, everyone, and welcome back to the Schoolhouse Rock
podcast. I'm Christy Clover, and I'm
(00:40):
excited to be your host again this week.
My guest this week is my friend Monica Swanson, author, speaker,
homeschool mom of four sons fromteens to grown men.
And if you missed our last episode, go back and listen.
We talked all about character training and how to pretty much
keep the joy the center of homeschooling even through the
(01:01):
holidays. So today we're going to be
tackling something every homeschool mom can relate to and
that is hormones. Because between teen moods and
shifting mom hormones and the emotional ups and downs that
come with family life, it can feel like a full time job trying
to keep the peace. And so Monica and I want to
(01:24):
laugh a little and encourage a lot and talk about how to stay
peaceful and connected when emotions are running high and
and your energy levels are running low.
But before we jump into our conversation, I'd like to thank
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(01:46):
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(02:10):
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CTC Math, Math Made Easy. All righty my friends, I'm back.
And today I'm bringing back Monica Swanson on the show with
(02:33):
me. So welcome to the show again,
Monica. Thank you.
I'm so excited to talk to you today.
Oh my goodness. Well, we both know that
homeschooling happens in real life, and that means it doesn't
stop when our teens hit mood swings or when moms like us hit
that wonderful season known as perimenopause.
And so today we are going to be making moms and even dads
(02:57):
listening, aware of the reality that I know hit me completely by
surprise. Perimenopause and homeschooling
and marriage insanity like theseare things that I honestly had
no idea that were happening in our homeschooling life and our
family life until I started doing more research on it.
So I thought it'd be fun to havea little girlfriend to
(03:17):
girlfriend chat about how we cantry to navigate our own midlife
changes while our hormones are plummeting and our teens
hormones are going through the roof.
So it was just so funny because it hit me.
I was like, Oh my goodness, that's not fair.
It's interesting that the Lord set things up like that, like
he, he knows what he's doing. I trust him, but I'm like,
(03:38):
really? I know.
No. And it was funny because I'm
like, as a science major, I'm like, maybe this is like a weird
osmosis, like our hormones are leaving and going into them or
something. I don't know.
Makes sense? Oh yes, So I know personally,
like I had never even heard of perimenopause.
Like all I had ever heard about was like hot flashes and then
(04:01):
you hit menopause and like that was all I heard about.
So I had like no clue just how early it can hit and how long it
takes. I mean, did you?
That's because I think until about a year ago, nobody talked
about it. Nobody knew about it.
Most of our parents didn't talk about it.
It was like this hush, hush, awkward.
(04:22):
I don't even know if they knew what they were going through.
Because sadly, I think that a lot of people just made women
feel like they were crazy for a few years.
And I know that I brought it up to my doctor years ago.
Like, what should I do to be prepared?
I don't want to lose my mind. I don't want to go crazy.
And she would say, now this is good advice, generally good
(04:43):
advice. She'd say, I think if you
exercise and eat healthy, you'regoing to do OK.
Now that that's a good start. But that really wasn't enough to
say there's a lot more going on.But to give my doctor credit, I
don't think most doctors even have been educated on this.
My husband's a doctor. He got pretty much zero in
medical school on this topic. So thank God we're living in a
(05:06):
time where there is more research.
They are talking about it more, and we as women are talking to
one another more, which is really probably half the
solution is just being able to talk about it.
So here we are. I know because, you know, I
think I didn't realize how many things are related.
Yes, Amen. I mean, I think you and I were
joking. Frozen shoulder.
(05:26):
OK. Like I had no idea I was seeing
a PT. I could have a whole episode
about frozen shoulder alone. So yes.
Do you have frozen shoulder? What?
What do you have? Do you have?
Right now, so my, I think it's frozen shoulder, my shoulder.
I've been going to PT for my shoulder and then but I mean,
truth be known, like and again, like Monica and I just little
like disclaimer, we're not doctors and like I but I have
(05:50):
been to a doctor. I've had my hormones checked.
I am entering, I am entering into the phase of officially
being in menopause, but I'm I'm still not quite there, but I've
started some hormones noticing even with the hormones, my
shoulder's starting to get a little better, which is just.
So weird. But like the shoulder thing.
But I was talking to a bunch of other moms like, Oh yeah, it's
the frozen, It's it's perimenopause.
I'm like, my shoulder pain is related to this.
(06:14):
I mean. What yes, they call it and when
I so I was 49 when I got frozen shoulder and my doctor said Oh
yeah, we call that 50 year old shoulder.
I was like what? And, and I still, he still
didn't make the connection for me and explaining, oh, when
estrogen drops, this is what's happening in your joints.
But there is a direct relationship.
And yes, I did a year and a halfof pretty severe frozen shoulder
(06:37):
on the right side. And just as that was going away,
I got it on the left side. So I spent three years of my
life suffering. If anyone out there has frozen
shoulder, I tell people like I want to start a support group
for it because it's it's such a real thing and I really did
suffer. So it is hormone related, but so
are so many other things, sometimes surprising things that
(07:02):
women go through that no one would guess is related to
hormones. But I think there's a whole
range of different symptoms thatpeople suffer so.
Oh, yeah. Well, I was like, everything was
kind of hitting me all at once because I'm like, oh, brain fog
and all this stuff. And I mean, here I think people
are like, maybe it's gluten. I'm like, yeah, maybe, yeah,
it's not. Maybe it's, you know, this, this
(07:24):
other thing. And and then it was hitting me
too. And I don't know if you've, I
mean, like, we can probably do awhole episode on this, but it
just kind of hit me because in life, I don't know about you,
but I feel like a lot of people we know and we all got married
around the same time. A lot of them are going through
divorces. My goodness.
It's so sad, but now I'm like, it's perimenopause's fault.
(07:44):
It really is in our minds. So I'm like.
It is, I, I think there needs tobe more research on that because
I do believe that there's so many marriages that fall apart
right about the time now, peoplewill say things like, well, the
kids, you know, we were empty nesters.
We were rediscovering ourselves or all the different things.
(08:05):
But I'm like, actually, if you look back, that was exactly when
she was going through perimenopause.
And who knows what's going on inour men.
We don't talk a lot about their hormone changes, but they're
probably going through their ownsomething.
And so if you can just hang in there.
Anyone listening, if your marriage is suffering, of course
we're going to encourage you gethelp.
Don't give up, but especially ifyou can just hang in there
(08:28):
through a few years, maybe get your hormones taken care of.
You might be surprised that things get better.
So don't give up. Do yes.
Do not give up. I know.
So I want to switch gears a little bit because we're talking
about our hormones, but I also want to talk about the other
side of things. So ours are going down and our
children's are going up. And so, you know, we have these
(08:50):
different hormone changes happening.
So I'm going to get us out of like, you know, the hot.
Seat if possible. If possible, but I know you've
homeschooled 4 boys through all of these stages, so you've seen
these moods and hormones coming in.
And we kind of talked about thatvery briefly in our last
(09:11):
conversation. But how would you encourage a
mom or dad who just feels like emotions are running the
household and you know they're just going crazy?
So whether it's the kids or themselves, like how would you
encourage a mom in that? Yes.
Well, I'll start by saying, saying, you know, like you
mentioned, I have raised four boys.
I have not raised daughters. And I know that's a whole nother
thing, but I was a girl and I remember well going through that
(09:33):
season. I wouldn't go back to middle
school or freshman year of high school if I were paid too.
So God bless them. And in the world today, it is so
much more challenging. And so all the grace in the
world goes out to those kids whoare trying to navigate those
early teenage, tween and teenageyears.
It's tough. They need so much love and
(09:54):
support. But I will say, practically
speaking, because I love to be practical, my number one
suggestion is, I'd say especially for boys, but I think
this is for both. Kids need to be active.
They need to get out in the fresh air if possible.
They need to be challenged. They need to sweat.
I believe that a kid that comes in from hard exercise, hard
(10:18):
work, whatever it might be, it is just going to be in such a
healthier place mentally than ifthey're sitting around,
especially staring at screens. So be wise, get them outside.
Some kids aren't going to, you know, they're going to resist
you on that, but it really is your responsibility as a parent.
I mean, the American Medical Association recommends an hour a
(10:40):
day for kids like 6 years old through 18 of physical activity,
mostly aerobic. Even my boys who are very
active, an hour a day is a lot. And that is like minimal
requirement. So most of us aren't going to
get that every single day. But I'd say if you make that a
goal, your kids are going to be so much better off.
And guess what, moms, we could use the same.
(11:04):
So the more active you are, the more fresh air you get, the
healthier you're going to all be.
So do it as a family. Get out for a walk.
Go, you know, go for a good hikeif you have the time.
Just get everyone out. Now, I totally agree.
I had a moment with my boys, andyou'll relate to this, but there
was a moment when one of the boys was struggling.
(11:27):
I could tell that he was just having a rush of testosterone.
And being the sports medicine mother that I am, I just kind of
said exactly that. I'm like, oh, I can see that
testosterone is kind of taking over right now.
I'm like, how about you go for arun and then we'll come back and
we'll have a conversation because I don't think we're
going to go anywhere right now. And so I just kind of called it
(11:47):
out for what it was and it kind of threw him off.
And I'm a big believer as far aslike the how the brain works,
that when you surprise the brainthat it kind of shakes it up.
And so like he wasn't expecting that.
And so he's like, oh, OK. And he just, he went out for a
run. He had a great time talking.
About. But yeah, it was, it was just so
funny and that it just kind of came out of my mouth and I was
(12:08):
like, oh, that was probably, I don't know if that was polite or
not polite, but it came out, it worked.
And so. There it was.
I'm such a believer. I love that you did that.
And I really, I, I've told the story that when my oldest son
was about 12/13, he had been competing in surfing in his
earlier years, but he decided that competition wasn't for him
in surfing. And with that, I started to
(12:30):
realize that though he's an active kid, he wasn't involved
in any organized sports. He loved, you know, doing
videography, He loved doing computer work.
And I was like, oh, I could see him becoming super sedentary.
So I just had a really practicaltalk with him.
And I said, listen, for the restof your life, your body needs
activity. So this is a good time to choose
(12:51):
a sport or two that you just do on the regular just as a
discipline. So I'm going to invite you to
start go for a run, go 1-2 milestoday, tomorrow, get in the
ocean or find a pool to swim in,lift some weights.
But let's do something that is kind of a lifelong sport and at
first he didn't love running, but he that we live by trails.
(13:11):
It's a great place to run. So I trying and now as we
record, he is training for a marathon as a 26 year old.
He loves running, he loves surfing, he loves all the
things. He lives in California, but he
has found that when he's stressed, exercise helps.
When he needs to connect with God certain, you know, he loves
to go on the ocean. All the things he loves to do,
(13:34):
he finds exercise just really supports and makes it even
better. So I'm thankful that back then,
when he wasn't thinking of it, Ireally made that a requirement
and I think it changed his life.I absolutely.
I love it. His life so.
Oh, I love that. That's so important.
Another big question. I think this is good for you
(13:54):
specifically because you're so good at like, you know, you
wrote Raisin amazing. But you know, as we're kind of
talking about this and we've gottempers flaring here and there,
you know, both ours and theirs and just we need to practice our
patience and all of those types of things.
But how can we best take even those opportunities when, you
(14:15):
know, patience is running thin to connect with our kids?
So instead of allowing these conflicts, So what are some good
ways that we can be connecting? I do think anytime we can be
active and do things together, Ithink a car ride is a great
time. You know, they, they say
especially with boys being shoulder to shoulder is a little
bit better than eye. So in the car, haven't you know,
(14:36):
I say phones down, no phones. Even though we break that rule,
something, not the driver, but the kids will try to get on the
phone and but I say phones down.Let's just talk during this car
ride. Getting out for a walk after
dinner. Our family loves to get out for
a walk, a hike, even doing some chores, you know, hey, let's
fold laundry together. You're kind of shoulder to
shoulder and that helps you to connect.
(14:59):
But but I do think anytime you're active is going to help
kids just open up a little bit more because they're not focused
on like, oh, she's staring in myeyes, she's looking into my
soul. It's just a little bit safer,
more relaxed time if you are shoulder to shoulder.
So unload the dishes together and chat while you do it.
And I think that that can reallyhelp that connection.
It's so good. I'm going to practice all these
things. We are going to take a quick
(15:21):
break, but don't go anywhere. We're going to be right back
with Monica Swanson as we talk about what it looks like to stay
calm and grounded when those hormones are flying high.
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(16:48):
All right, we are back with Monica Swanson.
And before the break, we were laughing and maybe sweating a
little about how hormones, in fact, our homeschooling and our
family life. But now I really want to get
more practical because every family, you know, hits those
emotional days. And So what has helped you
personally to stay grounded and calm when you know, like either
(17:11):
you're struggling or maybe you're having kind of consistent
struggles with kids. So how do you personally kind of
handle those rough days? Yes, well, the first answer is
probably 1. You'll hear from, you know,
anywhere, but spending time withthe Lord every morning is just
like vital. So hopefully you're already
doing that. But I would say, you know,
(17:33):
really bringing things to the Lord specifically and, and
acknowledging the areas that youare struggling the most.
You know, devotions are so key and just being able to be really
real and say God, you know, you made me, you know what's going
on in my heart, in my mind, you know everything on my plate, You
know my concerns, my anxieties. You know, Philippians 4/6
(17:53):
through 7 is maybe overused, butjust you know, do not be anxious
about anything but in everythingby prayer and petition with
Thanksgiving. So truly coming to God and
saying, I'm going to give you mycares, I'm going to give you my
anxieties. I really need your peace and to
just recognize that he is a practical God.
He will meet you where you are. So starting your day with the
(18:15):
Lord and then not making it an isolated time with the Lord, but
maybe bringing that Bible out and having it open to whatever
you're learning. And when you hit that moment in
the day, seeing it visually. I mean, I love putting
scriptures up around the house just as a reminder to me so that
when I am in the heat of the moment, it's not like that was
six hours ago that I spent with the Lord, but it's actually
(18:37):
right there in front of me. So sometimes just having to
return to a moment, you know, bestill and know that I am God.
I don't have to have everything perfect, but this isn't probably
something to lose my cool over. And so just that perspective
that His Word and His Spirit brings when you just recenter,
refocus. And what's awesome about
(18:57):
homeschooling is you can do thatwith your kids.
If they're having a hard moment,you can also redirect them to
scripture. Having some quiet worship music
on in the house is so helpful. Just those little things that we
can do to remind all of us that God is still in control, that
we're going to be okay. Sometimes we need to throw off
school and just do something fun, do something celebratory.
(19:21):
If it's the holidays, I love to wrap up school a little extra
early in December so that we canenjoy just the festivities of
the season. So I think just being grounded
and doing what it takes to remind yourself throughout the
day that God is on the throne and everything's going to be OK.
Oh, I love that that is so important in that scripture.
I love that scripture and I always love reminding people
(19:43):
that if you look, you know, likethe numbers are put in in
different places just so for us for reference.
But if you go just before, do not be anxious and anything it
says the Lord is near. And so I always love that like
the Lord is near. Do not be anxious about anything
like so I've been really personally trying to practice
the presence of the Lord and trying to.
(20:05):
Just sit and be like and ask himlike, you know, can you, can you
help me to feel you right now? And just like trying to just
have that more intimate, you know, time with him, like
imagining him on the throne and all of his glory because it
makes it more real. Because I think so often I put
Jesus in a box and then it's just like I, I had my quiet
time, I had my prayer and I justgo about my day and I forget
(20:28):
that the God of the universe, the one who created everything,
created me and all my hormones, even the ones that are going
away, you know, and he loves me.And I have to get myself back to
that. And like he is equipping me for
what he has called me to. And you know what?
Homeschooling and parenting and these kids are what he's calling
(20:49):
me to. So good.
Yes, just this good morning. I wrote down John 1633 where
Jesus says in this world you will have tribulation.
And I can't help but think that means all of it.
That means the stuff we're goingthrough today as well as the big
stuff. But you know, take heart.
I've overcome the world. And so yes, let's let's not
(21:11):
forget the benefits of knowing him.
We actually have his spirit to help us walk through everything.
And so, yeah, calling on him to be near.
I love that, yes. All right, so I want us to get a
little practical again and kind of shifting gears back over to
moms and this phase that they, you know, like this 10 to 15
(21:33):
year thing called perimenopause.Again, I had no idea just how
long it hit, but are there some strategic things we can be
doing? I know we talked about exercise
being one, but are there any other things that you found
helpful during this season and that are kind of things to add
into our daily to do's to be helping us to be at our
(21:54):
healthiest? Yes, I will say that I think
that talking to your doctor is super important because
everyone's going to have a different experience.
I have friends who are cruising through this season of
perimenopause, even into menopause, and doing really well
just naturally with exercise, eating healthy, getting enough
(22:15):
sleep. But I also have a lot of friends
who are using the hormone replacement therapy.
And that's something that I started a little bit later in my
perimenopause journey and has made a huge difference,
especially in the hot flashes and all that.
So I'm not prescribing anything to anyone, but I will say, thank
God we live in a time where there's more research and more
people talking about it. And so figure out what you need
(22:38):
to do. I mean, I have friends who are
like really struggling with depression and thought there was
something wrong. They went on hormone replacement
therapy and they're like a new person.
So whatever you need to do, talkto somebody.
I, I'd say seek help for your symptoms, but in addition to
that, I know you and I both loveto exercise.
And so yes, we're all kind of lifting heavier weights, wearing
(23:01):
the weighted vest, trying to keep, you know, we lose muscle
mass at such a high rate going into our 50s and beyond.
And so trying to take care of the muscle, eating a little more
protein. You and I talked about eating
some healthier fats to just helpsupport the hormones.
And again, you know, you don't want to get too much down that
(23:23):
rabbit trail because we can makethat an idol just like anything
else. But I do think listening to some
podcasts, doing some research, finding some books, talk to your
friends. Just make it an open
conversation and you're going tofind the support that you need
depending on how you're doing asyou go through it.
But don't be silent. Don't suffer quietly.
Talk to somebody and talk to your husband.
(23:44):
Our men need to be able to support us through this too.
And so I think just the more conversation you have, you know,
the healthier you're going to begoing through it.
Yeah, no, it's so important. I feel like, you know, I've been
very vocal about the fact that Iwent through burnout and I went
through a season of depression and I did legitimately have
things happening in my life thatwere very difficult.
(24:07):
And, you know, I was starting toprocess, I was going to counsel
and I was starting to process some traumatic things that
happened to my childhood. So like, legitimately, I had
some stuff going on, but at the same time, I, I, you know, now,
you know, hindsight 2020, I'm like, holy smokes.
How much worse did I probably feel it because I was going
(24:29):
through this new season and I had no clue.
And it really did make my husband Steve feel really
helpless because he didn't know how to help me and no one.
And now I have been able to likeshare with every time I learn
something new about what what I'm going through very
menopause. I hate the word PM, but when I
(24:50):
was going through it and still am I, you know, I can talk to
him about that and we can talk through things and, you know,
it's just so important because you really do feel like you're
losing yourself and you're like,am I?
And I think that's the best way I can describe it is I just feel
like at the end of the day, I'm just so tired.
(25:10):
And then I don't feel like doinga lot of things that I had used
to want to do. Like it is work for me to get
out the door to go for a walk, but I feel so much better
afterwards. So it helps that Steve knows
this. And so he's like, Hey, what time
today do you want to get our walk in?
And it's become this date for us.
And so it's just, you know, whenyou can work as a team and you
(25:33):
know, you know that you're not going through it alone.
And if you know for those who are listening who aren't
married, find a friend who can do this, whether it's
accountability, not that you need accountability, but like
for all the little new, but it'shelpful for your health and fun.
Disclaimer, I know you. I told you, but I have not told
our listeners here. But this January, I am becoming
(25:57):
a grandma. So I am so.
Excited. The best, Oh my goodness, it is
absolutely. I mean, I've heard it's the
best. I cannot wait.
But it's amazing how motivating that has been for me to get my
health in check. I mean, that's partly why, well,
that I mean like knowing it was coming was partly why I chose.
(26:18):
I mean, after 5 babies I had made, I mean, major diastasis,
abdominal diastasis. So my abdominal muscles were
separated, my back was going outconstantly and I remember
watching someone holding a toddler and the toddler jerked
back and just watching that I thought to myself, Oh my gosh,
my back will go out. If that happened to me, my back
(26:39):
would go out. And so I started and for me, I
chose to have massive abdominal,which is not fun, but it really
has forced me. Like my whole focus now is
getting my body in shape. Like I am walking every day, I
am lifting weights again and I hadn't been doing that.
I'm eating so much healthier protein as a major priority for
(27:00):
me. And the healthy fat thing that
you mentioned, that was so weird.
That was like, it didn't make any sense to me.
I'm like why if I'm trying to lose?
Exactly. We're trained to make fat eating
fat. But it doesn't.
It doesn't. And I mean, like, our brains
need fat. And so that was even helpful for
me to be like, oh, like the brain fog will not be as bad if
(27:21):
I'm actually giving it nutrientsthat it needs.
So just little things like. That are all of that important
Yes. Yeah.
Can I jump in and say one thing?The younger mom's listening.
I also don't like to scare people.
Do not assume that you're going to enter some horrible season
because again, it it really doesn't have to be that bad.
(27:42):
I'd say stay on top of it. Notice your symptoms.
I again didn't even connect frozen shoulder to hormones
until after the fact. But when you have certain things
come up, tune into that. Talk to somebody, but don't
assume it's going to be terriblebecause God made our bodies.
He is going to walk with you through all of the different
seasons and it's going to be OK,but it can be so much better if
(28:04):
you are looking for the support you need, talking to people and
taking care of yourselves. And definitely exercise and
nutrition is a big part of that.The other thing I'll mention
here because for me it's been a big deal, is sleep.
Sleep became difficult. I would say in my late 30s.
I started to really do the wake up in the night thing and the
(28:24):
thoughts would be spinning and Ijust like what is wrong with me?
And I think for that I've reallylearned to, you know, magnesium
before bed, you know, different supplements, but also just being
really wise and adulting by putting myself to bed earlier by
having a night time routine. You know, you hear that, but who
takes it serious? And finally, I'm like actually
(28:45):
when I go to bed earlier and I wear my aura ring.
So if you have a tracker, I, I am able to see that my deep
sleep is almost entirely before midnight.
So if I stay up till 11:00, I amcutting off hours of deep sleep.
So it really motivates me to go to bed earlier because I want to
get that healthy deep sleep. And then REM sleep typically
comes more towards the morning hours.
(29:07):
So giving yourself a nice chunk so that if you do wake up,
you're not stressed thinking I'mnot going to get enough sleep.
You're like, it's OK. I went to bed early enough that
even if I'm awake for a while, you know, pray do your little
mental games help me. I go through if anyone wants to
know. I go through A-Z saying the
(29:28):
attributes of God because what Ifind.
I've. Heard that if I try praying over
the things that come to my mind,it'll spin me into thinking
about those things, but I just get my mind off of the things
and on to the Lord and that really helps me with sleep.
So there's some just helpful tips and I did cover two
different times of women's Wellness series on my podcast,
(29:51):
so I can give you the link to those.
But that was a fun thing I did last fall and last spring and
people really enjoyed had some doctors on and talking about
everything from pelvic floor health to hormone health.
So I'll make sure to give you that link.
Oh, I love that. And I love that you mentioned,
like I, I hope we're not scaringpeople.
Right. No, no, no.
(30:12):
Don't be impressed. So good.
No, that was so good though because like this is something
to look forward to but I just, Ithink I personally was so
unaware. So it got me off guard.
And again, part of my problem was like I was literally
processing past trauma. Yes, yes there was.
Legit things going on, but at the same time they were both
hitting at this exactly. So I think it's so important for
(30:35):
us to be aware and do not wait. That's the other big thing that
I think so many of us women, we put our healths to our health to
the side because we're like we're focused on our family,
we're focused on the kids, we'refocused on the needs of our home
and of our home school. And we forget to take care of
our own health. And so that's so vital because
when we are taking care of our own health, we have that much
(30:58):
more energy to take care of those around us.
And I will admit that I did a bad job of that first season.
And so it was that much more difficult for me to get back in
shape. And and I will say that at 51, I
am probably in some of the otherthan maybe college because I am
in some of the best shape that Ihave been in for decades.
(31:18):
Like, I feel amazing now. And it's because I am walking
every day. I am lifting again.
I am making sleep a priority. I'm so glad you mentioned that.
And yeah, I'm like a weird sleepperson now.
I'm like, I want to talk about how to.
Sleep. Sleep is my favorite topic.
I'm like, I can nerd out on sleep all day long.
And I will say to what you're saying.
(31:40):
You're a better mom when you're happier and healthier and taking
care of yourself. And so it is not a selfish thing
to prioritize your health, your sleep, all of the above.
It is for the sake of everyone who you're around every day.
So yeah. So good.
Well my sweet friend, thank you so much for your honesty and
(32:02):
your encouragement and being real.
Of course. Absolutely.
Oh yes, so good. But before we go, please tell
our listeners again in case theydidn't get your last one and
they're listening to this one first.
Where can they find you and all of your amazing resources, your
books, all the things, your courses?
Yes. Well, home base is
(32:24):
monicaswanson.com and I'll just say if you are heading over
there, there's a button at the very top that says start here.
And when you do, there's a drop down, There's a homeschool link,
there's a women's Wellness link,and there's a character link.
So all the things we've talked about, there's a drop down and
each of them have a freebie, Each of them have a short e-mail
series where I share free resources and encouragement.
(32:47):
And those are kind of my top favorite things to talk about.
So if you're into those things, then we should be friends.
I love it and I shared in the first one.
I'll share it again in here likeyour newsletters are some of my
favorites so. There's a subscribe button over
there too. When you do the drop down South
monicaswanson.com go to start here and you're going to find
where you can join my e-mail list.
(33:08):
So I'd love to have you on board.
Oh, I love it. Well, thank you again for coming
on the show. Thanks.
All right, my friends, so as youprobably hear at the end of
every one of these episodes, youcan find all of those things
linked for you in the show notes.
So everything that Monica just mentioned will be found in the
show notes. So be sure to head over to
(33:30):
schoolhouserocked.com or you canalso stream the movie
Schoolhouse Rocked the Homeschool Revolution for free.
And be sure to subscribe to Schoolhouse Rocked on the
YouTube channel over there and follow along on your favorite
podcast app. It has been an absolute pleasure
to be your host this week on theSchoolhouse Rock podcast.
(33:50):
And my sweet friends, before yougo, I want to make sure that you
know about a few tools that I created to support you and your
homeschool and your mom life. We are heading into a brand new
year and it's the perfect time to reset and get organized in
your homeschool. So you can grab the Homeschool
Reset, which is a free three daymini course designed to help you
(34:11):
declutter your mind, reset your routines, and find more joy in
your homeschool days. So you can grab that anytime
over at christyclover.com/reset.And that's also where you'll
find a link to get $30 off my incredible Ultimate Homeschool
Organization course. It's truly life changing and I
cannot recommend it enough. And I also share all of my
(34:33):
homeschool tips, tricks, and resources there too.
So be sure to sign up for the Reset at
christyclover.com/reset. So come back next week for
another exciting guest on the Schoolhouse Rock Pie Podcast.
Be sure to stay tuned to the endto hear a preview of what's
coming up next week on the podcast.
Have a fabulous rest of your week my friends.
(34:58):
You're listening to the BiblicalFamily Network.
Hey, I'm Miki. And I'm Will and we're the Co
host of the Culture Proof podcast.
We want to invite you to join usevery week as we discuss what's
happening in the world and then filter those happenings through
a decidedly biblical lens. There are many questions,
especially when we see what's happening in our culture today,
but the answers are found withinthe Word of God, so that's where
(35:21):
we want to look. Amen.
When we resist those cultural trends that rival the truth.
We remain culture proof. All of the hosts talked about
this at the end of the year. We should all do an episode
together to tie up the year. And I was like, that is such a
great idea. It's been an amazing year of
really seeing the Lord bring things full circle and God has
(35:42):
just been so good and so faithful through it all.
When your heart. Is ministry and your heart.
Is homeschooling that doesn't? Change when you graduate your.
Last child, I think that's. What I love most about this
podcast is we. Encourage people to do that.
Do homeschooling. Well and do family well.
You, you hope that you culture proof them enough.
You hope that you've applied enough of the coding of the word
(36:04):
that when they go out into that world that they are able to
withstand. It's one thing to say that we
trust the Lord, but we don't really like to put it in
practice and and the only way toput it in practice is to have it
tested. I have to now step back and
release and surrender and go. They are going to have to figure
(36:24):
this out. It's really hard.
But what I praise the Lord for is that I had all those years of
homeschooling that nobody else taught my kids how to do it, and
I can release them into the hands of the Savior that they
walk with.
Spending time with the Lord, really bringing things to the
Lord specifically and and acknowledging the areas that you
are struggling the most and justbeing able to be really real and
say God, you know, you made me, you know what's going on in my
heart, in my mind, you know everything on my plate.
You know my concerns, my anxieties.
Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by
(00:20):
prayer and petition with Thanksgiving.
So truly coming to God and saying I'm going to give you my
cares, I'm going to give you my anxieties.
I really need your peace and to just recognize that He is a
practical God. He will meet you where you are.
Hello, everyone, and welcome back to the Schoolhouse Rock
podcast. I'm Christy Clover, and I'm
(00:40):
excited to be your host again this week.
My guest this week is my friend Monica Swanson, author, speaker,
homeschool mom of four sons fromteens to grown men.
And if you missed our last episode, go back and listen.
We talked all about character training and how to pretty much
keep the joy the center of homeschooling even through the
(01:01):
holidays. So today we're going to be
tackling something every homeschool mom can relate to and
that is hormones. Because between teen moods and
shifting mom hormones and the emotional ups and downs that
come with family life, it can feel like a full time job trying
to keep the peace. And so Monica and I want to
(01:24):
laugh a little and encourage a lot and talk about how to stay
peaceful and connected when emotions are running high and
and your energy levels are running low.
But before we jump into our conversation, I'd like to thank
our sponsor, CTC Math. So if you are looking for a math
program that truly works, CTC Math has you covered.
(01:46):
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(02:10):
stressing over math and I find her actually enjoying it.
Thank you so much for all you'vedone to help her find success in
the subject she hated but now enjoys.
So Sign up today at ctcmath.com and start your free trial.
CTC Math, Math Made Easy. All righty my friends, I'm back.
And today I'm bringing back Monica Swanson on the show with
(02:33):
me. So welcome to the show again,
Monica. Thank you.
I'm so excited to talk to you today.
Oh my goodness. Well, we both know that
homeschooling happens in real life, and that means it doesn't
stop when our teens hit mood swings or when moms like us hit
that wonderful season known as perimenopause.
And so today we are going to be making moms and even dads
(02:57):
listening, aware of the reality that I know hit me completely by
surprise. Perimenopause and homeschooling
and marriage insanity like theseare things that I honestly had
no idea that were happening in our homeschooling life and our
family life until I started doing more research on it.
So I thought it'd be fun to havea little girlfriend to
(03:17):
girlfriend chat about how we cantry to navigate our own midlife
changes while our hormones are plummeting and our teens
hormones are going through the roof.
So it was just so funny because it hit me.
I was like, Oh my goodness, that's not fair.
It's interesting that the Lord set things up like that, like
he, he knows what he's doing. I trust him, but I'm like,
(03:38):
really? I know.
No. And it was funny because I'm
like, as a science major, I'm like, maybe this is like a weird
osmosis, like our hormones are leaving and going into them or
something. I don't know.
Makes sense? Oh yes, So I know personally,
like I had never even heard of perimenopause.
Like all I had ever heard about was like hot flashes and then
(04:01):
you hit menopause and like that was all I heard about.
So I had like no clue just how early it can hit and how long it
takes. I mean, did you?
That's because I think until about a year ago, nobody talked
about it. Nobody knew about it.
Most of our parents didn't talk about it.
It was like this hush, hush, awkward.
(04:22):
I don't even know if they knew what they were going through.
Because sadly, I think that a lot of people just made women
feel like they were crazy for a few years.
And I know that I brought it up to my doctor years ago.
Like, what should I do to be prepared?
I don't want to lose my mind. I don't want to go crazy.
And she would say, now this is good advice, generally good
(04:43):
advice. She'd say, I think if you
exercise and eat healthy, you'regoing to do OK.
Now that that's a good start. But that really wasn't enough to
say there's a lot more going on.But to give my doctor credit, I
don't think most doctors even have been educated on this.
My husband's a doctor. He got pretty much zero in
medical school on this topic. So thank God we're living in a
(05:06):
time where there is more research.
They are talking about it more, and we as women are talking to
one another more, which is really probably half the
solution is just being able to talk about it.
So here we are. I know because, you know, I
think I didn't realize how many things are related.
Yes, Amen. I mean, I think you and I were
joking. Frozen shoulder.
(05:26):
OK. Like I had no idea I was seeing
a PT. I could have a whole episode
about frozen shoulder alone. So yes.
Do you have frozen shoulder? What?
What do you have? Do you have?
Right now, so my, I think it's frozen shoulder, my shoulder.
I've been going to PT for my shoulder and then but I mean,
truth be known, like and again, like Monica and I just little
like disclaimer, we're not doctors and like I but I have
(05:50):
been to a doctor. I've had my hormones checked.
I am entering, I am entering into the phase of officially
being in menopause, but I'm I'm still not quite there, but I've
started some hormones noticing even with the hormones, my
shoulder's starting to get a little better, which is just.
So weird. But like the shoulder thing.
But I was talking to a bunch of other moms like, Oh yeah, it's
the frozen, It's it's perimenopause.
I'm like, my shoulder pain is related to this.
(06:14):
I mean. What yes, they call it and when
I so I was 49 when I got frozen shoulder and my doctor said Oh
yeah, we call that 50 year old shoulder.
I was like what? And, and I still, he still
didn't make the connection for me and explaining, oh, when
estrogen drops, this is what's happening in your joints.
But there is a direct relationship.
And yes, I did a year and a halfof pretty severe frozen shoulder
(06:37):
on the right side. And just as that was going away,
I got it on the left side. So I spent three years of my
life suffering. If anyone out there has frozen
shoulder, I tell people like I want to start a support group
for it because it's it's such a real thing and I really did
suffer. So it is hormone related, but so
are so many other things, sometimes surprising things that
(07:02):
women go through that no one would guess is related to
hormones. But I think there's a whole
range of different symptoms thatpeople suffer so.
Oh, yeah. Well, I was like, everything was
kind of hitting me all at once because I'm like, oh, brain fog
and all this stuff. And I mean, here I think people
are like, maybe it's gluten. I'm like, yeah, maybe, yeah,
it's not. Maybe it's, you know, this, this
(07:24):
other thing. And and then it was hitting me
too. And I don't know if you've, I
mean, like, we can probably do awhole episode on this, but it
just kind of hit me because in life, I don't know about you,
but I feel like a lot of people we know and we all got married
around the same time. A lot of them are going through
divorces. My goodness.
It's so sad, but now I'm like, it's perimenopause's fault.
(07:44):
It really is in our minds. So I'm like.
It is, I, I think there needs tobe more research on that because
I do believe that there's so many marriages that fall apart
right about the time now, peoplewill say things like, well, the
kids, you know, we were empty nesters.
We were rediscovering ourselves or all the different things.
(08:05):
But I'm like, actually, if you look back, that was exactly when
she was going through perimenopause.
And who knows what's going on inour men.
We don't talk a lot about their hormone changes, but they're
probably going through their ownsomething.
And so if you can just hang in there.
Anyone listening, if your marriage is suffering, of course
we're going to encourage you gethelp.
Don't give up, but especially ifyou can just hang in there
(08:28):
through a few years, maybe get your hormones taken care of.
You might be surprised that things get better.
So don't give up. Do yes.
Do not give up. I know.
So I want to switch gears a little bit because we're talking
about our hormones, but I also want to talk about the other
side of things. So ours are going down and our
children's are going up. And so, you know, we have these
(08:50):
different hormone changes happening.
So I'm going to get us out of like, you know, the hot.
Seat if possible. If possible, but I know you've
homeschooled 4 boys through all of these stages, so you've seen
these moods and hormones coming in.
And we kind of talked about thatvery briefly in our last
(09:11):
conversation. But how would you encourage a
mom or dad who just feels like emotions are running the
household and you know they're just going crazy?
So whether it's the kids or themselves, like how would you
encourage a mom in that? Yes.
Well, I'll start by saying, saying, you know, like you
mentioned, I have raised four boys.
I have not raised daughters. And I know that's a whole nother
thing, but I was a girl and I remember well going through that
(09:33):
season. I wouldn't go back to middle
school or freshman year of high school if I were paid too.
So God bless them. And in the world today, it is so
much more challenging. And so all the grace in the
world goes out to those kids whoare trying to navigate those
early teenage, tween and teenageyears.
It's tough. They need so much love and
(09:54):
support. But I will say, practically
speaking, because I love to be practical, my number one
suggestion is, I'd say especially for boys, but I think
this is for both. Kids need to be active.
They need to get out in the fresh air if possible.
They need to be challenged. They need to sweat.
I believe that a kid that comes in from hard exercise, hard
(10:18):
work, whatever it might be, it is just going to be in such a
healthier place mentally than ifthey're sitting around,
especially staring at screens. So be wise, get them outside.
Some kids aren't going to, you know, they're going to resist
you on that, but it really is your responsibility as a parent.
I mean, the American Medical Association recommends an hour a
(10:40):
day for kids like 6 years old through 18 of physical activity,
mostly aerobic. Even my boys who are very
active, an hour a day is a lot. And that is like minimal
requirement. So most of us aren't going to
get that every single day. But I'd say if you make that a
goal, your kids are going to be so much better off.
And guess what, moms, we could use the same.
(11:04):
So the more active you are, the more fresh air you get, the
healthier you're going to all be.
So do it as a family. Get out for a walk.
Go, you know, go for a good hikeif you have the time.
Just get everyone out. Now, I totally agree.
I had a moment with my boys, andyou'll relate to this, but there
was a moment when one of the boys was struggling.
(11:27):
I could tell that he was just having a rush of testosterone.
And being the sports medicine mother that I am, I just kind of
said exactly that. I'm like, oh, I can see that
testosterone is kind of taking over right now.
I'm like, how about you go for arun and then we'll come back and
we'll have a conversation because I don't think we're
going to go anywhere right now. And so I just kind of called it
(11:47):
out for what it was and it kind of threw him off.
And I'm a big believer as far aslike the how the brain works,
that when you surprise the brainthat it kind of shakes it up.
And so like he wasn't expecting that.
And so he's like, oh, OK. And he just, he went out for a
run. He had a great time talking.
About. But yeah, it was, it was just so
funny and that it just kind of came out of my mouth and I was
(12:08):
like, oh, that was probably, I don't know if that was polite or
not polite, but it came out, it worked.
And so. There it was.
I'm such a believer. I love that you did that.
And I really, I, I've told the story that when my oldest son
was about 12/13, he had been competing in surfing in his
earlier years, but he decided that competition wasn't for him
in surfing. And with that, I started to
(12:30):
realize that though he's an active kid, he wasn't involved
in any organized sports. He loved, you know, doing
videography, He loved doing computer work.
And I was like, oh, I could see him becoming super sedentary.
So I just had a really practicaltalk with him.
And I said, listen, for the restof your life, your body needs
activity. So this is a good time to choose
(12:51):
a sport or two that you just do on the regular just as a
discipline. So I'm going to invite you to
start go for a run, go 1-2 milestoday, tomorrow, get in the
ocean or find a pool to swim in,lift some weights.
But let's do something that is kind of a lifelong sport and at
first he didn't love running, but he that we live by trails.
(13:11):
It's a great place to run. So I trying and now as we
record, he is training for a marathon as a 26 year old.
He loves running, he loves surfing, he loves all the
things. He lives in California, but he
has found that when he's stressed, exercise helps.
When he needs to connect with God certain, you know, he loves
to go on the ocean. All the things he loves to do,
(13:34):
he finds exercise just really supports and makes it even
better. So I'm thankful that back then,
when he wasn't thinking of it, Ireally made that a requirement
and I think it changed his life.I absolutely.
I love it. His life so.
Oh, I love that. That's so important.
Another big question. I think this is good for you
(13:54):
specifically because you're so good at like, you know, you
wrote Raisin amazing. But you know, as we're kind of
talking about this and we've gottempers flaring here and there,
you know, both ours and theirs and just we need to practice our
patience and all of those types of things.
But how can we best take even those opportunities when, you
(14:15):
know, patience is running thin to connect with our kids?
So instead of allowing these conflicts, So what are some good
ways that we can be connecting? I do think anytime we can be
active and do things together, Ithink a car ride is a great
time. You know, they, they say
especially with boys being shoulder to shoulder is a little
bit better than eye. So in the car, haven't you know,
(14:36):
I say phones down, no phones. Even though we break that rule,
something, not the driver, but the kids will try to get on the
phone and but I say phones down.Let's just talk during this car
ride. Getting out for a walk after
dinner. Our family loves to get out for
a walk, a hike, even doing some chores, you know, hey, let's
fold laundry together. You're kind of shoulder to
shoulder and that helps you to connect.
(14:59):
But but I do think anytime you're active is going to help
kids just open up a little bit more because they're not focused
on like, oh, she's staring in myeyes, she's looking into my
soul. It's just a little bit safer,
more relaxed time if you are shoulder to shoulder.
So unload the dishes together and chat while you do it.
And I think that that can reallyhelp that connection.
It's so good. I'm going to practice all these
things. We are going to take a quick
(15:21):
break, but don't go anywhere. We're going to be right back
with Monica Swanson as we talk about what it looks like to stay
calm and grounded when those hormones are flying high.
So stay tuned. Join Apologia for the Homeschool
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(16:48):
All right, we are back with Monica Swanson.
And before the break, we were laughing and maybe sweating a
little about how hormones, in fact, our homeschooling and our
family life. But now I really want to get
more practical because every family, you know, hits those
emotional days. And So what has helped you
personally to stay grounded and calm when you know, like either
(17:11):
you're struggling or maybe you're having kind of consistent
struggles with kids. So how do you personally kind of
handle those rough days? Yes, well, the first answer is
probably 1. You'll hear from, you know,
anywhere, but spending time withthe Lord every morning is just
like vital. So hopefully you're already
doing that. But I would say, you know,
(17:33):
really bringing things to the Lord specifically and, and
acknowledging the areas that youare struggling the most.
You know, devotions are so key and just being able to be really
real and say God, you know, you made me, you know what's going
on in my heart, in my mind, you know everything on my plate, You
know my concerns, my anxieties. You know, Philippians 4/6
(17:53):
through 7 is maybe overused, butjust you know, do not be anxious
about anything but in everythingby prayer and petition with
Thanksgiving. So truly coming to God and
saying, I'm going to give you mycares, I'm going to give you my
anxieties. I really need your peace and to
just recognize that he is a practical God.
He will meet you where you are. So starting your day with the
(18:15):
Lord and then not making it an isolated time with the Lord, but
maybe bringing that Bible out and having it open to whatever
you're learning. And when you hit that moment in
the day, seeing it visually. I mean, I love putting
scriptures up around the house just as a reminder to me so that
when I am in the heat of the moment, it's not like that was
six hours ago that I spent with the Lord, but it's actually
(18:37):
right there in front of me. So sometimes just having to
return to a moment, you know, bestill and know that I am God.
I don't have to have everything perfect, but this isn't probably
something to lose my cool over. And so just that perspective
that His Word and His Spirit brings when you just recenter,
refocus. And what's awesome about
(18:57):
homeschooling is you can do thatwith your kids.
If they're having a hard moment,you can also redirect them to
scripture. Having some quiet worship music
on in the house is so helpful. Just those little things that we
can do to remind all of us that God is still in control, that
we're going to be okay. Sometimes we need to throw off
school and just do something fun, do something celebratory.
(19:21):
If it's the holidays, I love to wrap up school a little extra
early in December so that we canenjoy just the festivities of
the season. So I think just being grounded
and doing what it takes to remind yourself throughout the
day that God is on the throne and everything's going to be OK.
Oh, I love that that is so important in that scripture.
I love that scripture and I always love reminding people
(19:43):
that if you look, you know, likethe numbers are put in in
different places just so for us for reference.
But if you go just before, do not be anxious and anything it
says the Lord is near. And so I always love that like
the Lord is near. Do not be anxious about anything
like so I've been really personally trying to practice
the presence of the Lord and trying to.
(20:05):
Just sit and be like and ask himlike, you know, can you, can you
help me to feel you right now? And just like trying to just
have that more intimate, you know, time with him, like
imagining him on the throne and all of his glory because it
makes it more real. Because I think so often I put
Jesus in a box and then it's just like I, I had my quiet
time, I had my prayer and I justgo about my day and I forget
(20:28):
that the God of the universe, the one who created everything,
created me and all my hormones, even the ones that are going
away, you know, and he loves me.And I have to get myself back to
that. And like he is equipping me for
what he has called me to. And you know what?
Homeschooling and parenting and these kids are what he's calling
(20:49):
me to. So good.
Yes, just this good morning. I wrote down John 1633 where
Jesus says in this world you will have tribulation.
And I can't help but think that means all of it.
That means the stuff we're goingthrough today as well as the big
stuff. But you know, take heart.
I've overcome the world. And so yes, let's let's not
(21:11):
forget the benefits of knowing him.
We actually have his spirit to help us walk through everything.
And so, yeah, calling on him to be near.
I love that, yes. All right, so I want us to get a
little practical again and kind of shifting gears back over to
moms and this phase that they, you know, like this 10 to 15
(21:33):
year thing called perimenopause.Again, I had no idea just how
long it hit, but are there some strategic things we can be
doing? I know we talked about exercise
being one, but are there any other things that you found
helpful during this season and that are kind of things to add
into our daily to do's to be helping us to be at our
(21:54):
healthiest? Yes, I will say that I think
that talking to your doctor is super important because
everyone's going to have a different experience.
I have friends who are cruising through this season of
perimenopause, even into menopause, and doing really well
just naturally with exercise, eating healthy, getting enough
(22:15):
sleep. But I also have a lot of friends
who are using the hormone replacement therapy.
And that's something that I started a little bit later in my
perimenopause journey and has made a huge difference,
especially in the hot flashes and all that.
So I'm not prescribing anything to anyone, but I will say, thank
God we live in a time where there's more research and more
people talking about it. And so figure out what you need
(22:38):
to do. I mean, I have friends who are
like really struggling with depression and thought there was
something wrong. They went on hormone replacement
therapy and they're like a new person.
So whatever you need to do, talkto somebody.
I, I'd say seek help for your symptoms, but in addition to
that, I know you and I both loveto exercise.
And so yes, we're all kind of lifting heavier weights, wearing
(23:01):
the weighted vest, trying to keep, you know, we lose muscle
mass at such a high rate going into our 50s and beyond.
And so trying to take care of the muscle, eating a little more
protein. You and I talked about eating
some healthier fats to just helpsupport the hormones.
And again, you know, you don't want to get too much down that
(23:23):
rabbit trail because we can makethat an idol just like anything
else. But I do think listening to some
podcasts, doing some research, finding some books, talk to your
friends. Just make it an open
conversation and you're going tofind the support that you need
depending on how you're doing asyou go through it.
But don't be silent. Don't suffer quietly.
Talk to somebody and talk to your husband.
(23:44):
Our men need to be able to support us through this too.
And so I think just the more conversation you have, you know,
the healthier you're going to begoing through it.
Yeah, no, it's so important. I feel like, you know, I've been
very vocal about the fact that Iwent through burnout and I went
through a season of depression and I did legitimately have
things happening in my life thatwere very difficult.
(24:07):
And, you know, I was starting toprocess, I was going to counsel
and I was starting to process some traumatic things that
happened to my childhood. So like, legitimately, I had
some stuff going on, but at the same time, I, I, you know, now,
you know, hindsight 2020, I'm like, holy smokes.
How much worse did I probably feel it because I was going
(24:29):
through this new season and I had no clue.
And it really did make my husband Steve feel really
helpless because he didn't know how to help me and no one.
And now I have been able to likeshare with every time I learn
something new about what what I'm going through very
menopause. I hate the word PM, but when I
(24:50):
was going through it and still am I, you know, I can talk to
him about that and we can talk through things and, you know,
it's just so important because you really do feel like you're
losing yourself and you're like,am I?
And I think that's the best way I can describe it is I just feel
like at the end of the day, I'm just so tired.
(25:10):
And then I don't feel like doinga lot of things that I had used
to want to do. Like it is work for me to get
out the door to go for a walk, but I feel so much better
afterwards. So it helps that Steve knows
this. And so he's like, Hey, what time
today do you want to get our walk in?
And it's become this date for us.
And so it's just, you know, whenyou can work as a team and you
(25:33):
know, you know that you're not going through it alone.
And if you know for those who are listening who aren't
married, find a friend who can do this, whether it's
accountability, not that you need accountability, but like
for all the little new, but it'shelpful for your health and fun.
Disclaimer, I know you. I told you, but I have not told
our listeners here. But this January, I am becoming
(25:57):
a grandma. So I am so.
Excited. The best, Oh my goodness, it is
absolutely. I mean, I've heard it's the
best. I cannot wait.
But it's amazing how motivating that has been for me to get my
health in check. I mean, that's partly why, well,
that I mean like knowing it was coming was partly why I chose.
(26:18):
I mean, after 5 babies I had made, I mean, major diastasis,
abdominal diastasis. So my abdominal muscles were
separated, my back was going outconstantly and I remember
watching someone holding a toddler and the toddler jerked
back and just watching that I thought to myself, Oh my gosh,
my back will go out. If that happened to me, my back
(26:39):
would go out. And so I started and for me, I
chose to have massive abdominal,which is not fun, but it really
has forced me. Like my whole focus now is
getting my body in shape. Like I am walking every day, I
am lifting weights again and I hadn't been doing that.
I'm eating so much healthier protein as a major priority for
(27:00):
me. And the healthy fat thing that
you mentioned, that was so weird.
That was like, it didn't make any sense to me.
I'm like why if I'm trying to lose?
Exactly. We're trained to make fat eating
fat. But it doesn't.
It doesn't. And I mean, like, our brains
need fat. And so that was even helpful for
me to be like, oh, like the brain fog will not be as bad if
(27:21):
I'm actually giving it nutrientsthat it needs.
So just little things like. That are all of that important
Yes. Yeah.
Can I jump in and say one thing?The younger mom's listening.
I also don't like to scare people.
Do not assume that you're going to enter some horrible season
because again, it it really doesn't have to be that bad.
(27:42):
I'd say stay on top of it. Notice your symptoms.
I again didn't even connect frozen shoulder to hormones
until after the fact. But when you have certain things
come up, tune into that. Talk to somebody, but don't
assume it's going to be terriblebecause God made our bodies.
He is going to walk with you through all of the different
seasons and it's going to be OK,but it can be so much better if
(28:04):
you are looking for the support you need, talking to people and
taking care of yourselves. And definitely exercise and
nutrition is a big part of that.The other thing I'll mention
here because for me it's been a big deal, is sleep.
Sleep became difficult. I would say in my late 30s.
I started to really do the wake up in the night thing and the
(28:24):
thoughts would be spinning and Ijust like what is wrong with me?
And I think for that I've reallylearned to, you know, magnesium
before bed, you know, different supplements, but also just being
really wise and adulting by putting myself to bed earlier by
having a night time routine. You know, you hear that, but who
takes it serious? And finally, I'm like actually
(28:45):
when I go to bed earlier and I wear my aura ring.
So if you have a tracker, I, I am able to see that my deep
sleep is almost entirely before midnight.
So if I stay up till 11:00, I amcutting off hours of deep sleep.
So it really motivates me to go to bed earlier because I want to
get that healthy deep sleep. And then REM sleep typically
comes more towards the morning hours.
(29:07):
So giving yourself a nice chunk so that if you do wake up,
you're not stressed thinking I'mnot going to get enough sleep.
You're like, it's OK. I went to bed early enough that
even if I'm awake for a while, you know, pray do your little
mental games help me. I go through if anyone wants to
know. I go through A-Z saying the
(29:28):
attributes of God because what Ifind.
I've. Heard that if I try praying over
the things that come to my mind,it'll spin me into thinking
about those things, but I just get my mind off of the things
and on to the Lord and that really helps me with sleep.
So there's some just helpful tips and I did cover two
different times of women's Wellness series on my podcast,
(29:51):
so I can give you the link to those.
But that was a fun thing I did last fall and last spring and
people really enjoyed had some doctors on and talking about
everything from pelvic floor health to hormone health.
So I'll make sure to give you that link.
Oh, I love that. And I love that you mentioned,
like I, I hope we're not scaringpeople.
Right. No, no, no.
(30:12):
Don't be impressed. So good.
No, that was so good though because like this is something
to look forward to but I just, Ithink I personally was so
unaware. So it got me off guard.
And again, part of my problem was like I was literally
processing past trauma. Yes, yes there was.
Legit things going on, but at the same time they were both
hitting at this exactly. So I think it's so important for
(30:35):
us to be aware and do not wait. That's the other big thing that
I think so many of us women, we put our healths to our health to
the side because we're like we're focused on our family,
we're focused on the kids, we'refocused on the needs of our home
and of our home school. And we forget to take care of
our own health. And so that's so vital because
when we are taking care of our own health, we have that much
(30:58):
more energy to take care of those around us.
And I will admit that I did a bad job of that first season.
And so it was that much more difficult for me to get back in
shape. And and I will say that at 51, I
am probably in some of the otherthan maybe college because I am
in some of the best shape that Ihave been in for decades.
(31:18):
Like, I feel amazing now. And it's because I am walking
every day. I am lifting again.
I am making sleep a priority. I'm so glad you mentioned that.
And yeah, I'm like a weird sleepperson now.
I'm like, I want to talk about how to.
Sleep. Sleep is my favorite topic.
I'm like, I can nerd out on sleep all day long.
And I will say to what you're saying.
(31:40):
You're a better mom when you're happier and healthier and taking
care of yourself. And so it is not a selfish thing
to prioritize your health, your sleep, all of the above.
It is for the sake of everyone who you're around every day.
So yeah. So good.
Well my sweet friend, thank you so much for your honesty and
(32:02):
your encouragement and being real.
Of course. Absolutely.
Oh yes, so good. But before we go, please tell
our listeners again in case theydidn't get your last one and
they're listening to this one first.
Where can they find you and all of your amazing resources, your
books, all the things, your courses?
Yes. Well, home base is
(32:24):
monicaswanson.com and I'll just say if you are heading over
there, there's a button at the very top that says start here.
And when you do, there's a drop down, There's a homeschool link,
there's a women's Wellness link,and there's a character link.
So all the things we've talked about, there's a drop down and
each of them have a freebie, Each of them have a short e-mail
series where I share free resources and encouragement.
(32:47):
And those are kind of my top favorite things to talk about.
So if you're into those things, then we should be friends.
I love it and I shared in the first one.
I'll share it again in here likeyour newsletters are some of my
favorites so. There's a subscribe button over
there too. When you do the drop down South
monicaswanson.com go to start here and you're going to find
where you can join my e-mail list.
(33:08):
So I'd love to have you on board.
Oh, I love it. Well, thank you again for coming
on the show. Thanks.
All right, my friends, so as youprobably hear at the end of
every one of these episodes, youcan find all of those things
linked for you in the show notes.
So everything that Monica just mentioned will be found in the
show notes. So be sure to head over to
(33:30):
schoolhouserocked.com or you canalso stream the movie
Schoolhouse Rocked the Homeschool Revolution for free.
And be sure to subscribe to Schoolhouse Rocked on the
YouTube channel over there and follow along on your favorite
podcast app. It has been an absolute pleasure
to be your host this week on theSchoolhouse Rock podcast.
(33:50):
And my sweet friends, before yougo, I want to make sure that you
know about a few tools that I created to support you and your
homeschool and your mom life. We are heading into a brand new
year and it's the perfect time to reset and get organized in
your homeschool. So you can grab the Homeschool
Reset, which is a free three daymini course designed to help you
(34:11):
declutter your mind, reset your routines, and find more joy in
your homeschool days. So you can grab that anytime
over at christyclover.com/reset.And that's also where you'll
find a link to get $30 off my incredible Ultimate Homeschool
Organization course. It's truly life changing and I
cannot recommend it enough. And I also share all of my
(34:33):
homeschool tips, tricks, and resources there too.
So be sure to sign up for the Reset at
christyclover.com/reset. So come back next week for
another exciting guest on the Schoolhouse Rock Pie Podcast.
Be sure to stay tuned to the endto hear a preview of what's
coming up next week on the podcast.
Have a fabulous rest of your week my friends.
(34:58):
You're listening to the BiblicalFamily Network.
Hey, I'm Miki. And I'm Will and we're the Co
host of the Culture Proof podcast.
We want to invite you to join usevery week as we discuss what's
happening in the world and then filter those happenings through
a decidedly biblical lens. There are many questions,
especially when we see what's happening in our culture today,
but the answers are found withinthe Word of God, so that's where
(35:21):
we want to look. Amen.
When we resist those cultural trends that rival the truth.
We remain culture proof. All of the hosts talked about
this at the end of the year. We should all do an episode
together to tie up the year. And I was like, that is such a
great idea. It's been an amazing year of
really seeing the Lord bring things full circle and God has
(35:42):
just been so good and so faithful through it all.
When your heart. Is ministry and your heart.
Is homeschooling that doesn't? Change when you graduate your.
Last child, I think that's. What I love most about this
podcast is we. Encourage people to do that.
Do homeschooling. Well and do family well.
You, you hope that you culture proof them enough.
You hope that you've applied enough of the coding of the word
(36:04):
that when they go out into that world that they are able to
withstand. It's one thing to say that we
trust the Lord, but we don't really like to put it in
practice and and the only way toput it in practice is to have it
tested. I have to now step back and
release and surrender and go. They are going to have to figure
(36:24):
this out. It's really hard.
But what I praise the Lord for is that I had all those years of
homeschooling that nobody else taught my kids how to do it, and
I can release them into the hands of the Savior that they
walk with.
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