How do you protect your kids in today's digital world? In this powerful episode of the Schoolhouse Rocked Podcast, host Aby Rinella sits down with Greta Eskridge (author, speaker, and second-generation homeschool mom) to talk about one of the most important—and challenging—topics for Christian families: how to talk to your kids about pornography. 🎧
Greta shares her personal journey, why early and open conversations matter, and practical steps every parent can take to prepare your kids for this danger. Discover how to have honest, age-appropriate talks with your children, break the cycle of shame, and prepare them for a culture that normalizes inappropriate content.
✨ Grab tips on:
- When to start the conversation (hint: earlier than you think!)
- How to make awkward topics approachable and faith-filled
- Creating a "screen safety plan" that your kids will remember
Don't miss Greta's actionable advice—and learn why protecting your children means more than just blocking bad content.
Subscribe now for more Christian homeschooling encouragement!
Recommended Resources:
The Hiding Place, by Corrie Ten Boom
Tramp for the Lord, by Corrie Ten Boom
CalledtotheTop.com – Aby’s website and social media links!
His Calling My Passion – Aby Rinella on Facebook
Sponsors:
Apologia is a Christ-centered, award-winning homeschool curriculum provider. Our mission is to help homeschooling students and families learn, live, and defend the Christian faith through our print and digital curriculum and online classes.
BJU Press Homeschool is dedicated to providing homeschool families with academically strong curriculum rooted in a biblical worldview. They offer a complete curriculum from preschool through 12th grade, available in both traditional textbooks and video courses. By teaching through the lens of Christ’s power, they help students view the world through the transformative story
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
(00:00):
This shouldn't be like, I fully recognize this should not be.
It is not God's plan. It's not good.
But we live in a fallen world. And because we live in a fallen
world and we live in 2025 and pornography is real and it is a
threat to our children, we have to be proactive.
(00:21):
Hey everybody, welcome back to the Schoolhouse Rock podcast.
I'm Abby Rinella and I am so excited to be back with you as
your host today. And I have the most exciting
guest today. I cannot wait to introduce you.
But first, I would like to thankour sponsor, BJU Press
Homeschool. I want to say thank you to BJU
Press Homeschool for sponsoring this podcast.
(00:42):
Their materials won't just equipped you for a successful
homeschool journey. They will prepare your child for
a future full of possibilities so that your child can
confidently move beyond homeschool, ready for whatever
God has next. They've crafted their curriculum
to give you the tools you need, and they're rooted in a solid
biblical foundation. BJU Press Homeschool offers
lessons that encourage critical thinking skills as well as
(01:05):
activities and lessons that support multi sensory learning
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And they have both online and parent LED formats to fit your
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encourage a love of learning in your child and they'll be with
you every step of the way. Visit the I'm at
bjupresshomeschool.com. That's bjupresshomeschool.com.
(01:28):
Okay, everybody, we are so excited to have you and I cannot
wait to introduce you to my friend.
And I have to say she's also a bit of my hero.
And and you would know her as ifyou're online, you know her as
ma and PA modern on social media.
And this is my friend, Greta Eskridge.
Hi, Greta. Hi, how are you?
(01:49):
I'm good. How are you?
I'm good too. Good, Greta wrote has written 2
amazing books and I2 right Greta?
Three, actually. Three.
OK, so we have adventuring together, which was absolutely
one of my favorite. And then tell me before this,
this new one, what's the other one?
The second one came out two years later and it's called
Advent. Oh, I'm say the wrong title
(02:11):
because that's where my brain is.
It's called 100 Days of Adventure and it's a book for
kids. Oh, OK, awesome, awesome.
Well, it's going on my Amazon list right now.
And so Greta is a speaker and just, I've always more than a
speaker. To me, she's just an encourager.
She is like that friend next door that you can call, which by
the way, I have and just talk toabout anything.
(02:34):
And she is a wealth of information, but more than
anything, she's going to point you to Jesus and everything she
says. And that's what I most love
about her. So, Greta, would you introduce
us to your family and any of theother fun facts that maybe I've
missed about you? Sure.
Well first, fun fact. I'm a second generation
homeschool mom. So I was homeschooled as a kid
(02:57):
back in the 80s when hardly anyone else was.
When we started, there was one other homeschool family in our
town. Oh my goodness.
And I loved homeschooling so much that when I first met my
husband, I was 18 years old, andI told him on our second date,
By the way, when I have kids, I'm homeschooling them.
(03:17):
So if you're not a fan of homeschooling, we shouldn't keep
seeing each other. We shouldn't order the main
course, we'll just stick to the appetizer.
And here we are like we've been married for 27 years and we've
homeschooled our kids from the beginning.
So we have 4 kids and two are done with school, two more are
(03:39):
are finishing up. I've got a 2119 almost 17 and
13. So we love homeschooling and we
also, you know, we love being outside.
We live in Southern California and in between home schooling
and, you know, running my home and all that stuff and being at
(04:03):
the beach as much as possible. I also am a writer, a speaker,
and a podcaster. And I love to encourage parents
to cultivate connection with their kids and to help parents
keep their kids safe in the online world that we live in
now. I love that, you know, it's so
funny. The last three guests I've had
(04:24):
on are all second generation homeschoolers.
And what does I mean that tells you so much.
It works, right? And it doesn't just work to go
with the humdrum of life. Like you guys are making
differences in the world. You're, you're actually, you
know, making Kingdom differences, which is so cool.
So today, I mean, I, I have loved your, your, I mean, you
know me and, and the audience knows me.
I love to adventure like this iswhat.
(04:47):
I feel like I should not talk about adventure with you because
you put me to shame. No, not at all.
But that is something that you and I have in common that I
think connects us also is just our deep desire to connect with
our kids through adventure. But you have actually recently
written another book and we're going to talk about the topic of
that book. And it's it doesn't feel as fun
and light hearted as adventuring.
(05:10):
And it's actually a little bit of a hard topic, but it is, I
would say, one of the most important topics that we can
talk about. And there is, in my opinion, no
better person to dive into this hard topic than you because
there's something about you, Greta.
God has given you a gift to takethe scary out of things.
And you have a way of bringing an urgency to this topic.
(05:32):
But but matching it with an easeand a piece that makes it feel
doable to parents and you're you're just a gift from God in
this topic. And and so the topic today.
And I just want to tell parents,if you have littles listening,
if you have kids around you, maybe take a pause and pre
listen to this episode. So we're just going to give you
(05:53):
a minute to to go give kids a snack and then you can come back
and listen. Good plan.
Because the topic today we're going to talk about is
pornography and the importance of talking about pornography to
our children. And so Greta, I want to, before
we dive into that, I want you totake us back to the very
beginning because you're kind ofknown for adventuring and wild
(06:14):
and fun and connecting with kidsand like strolling them through
the grocery aisles in grocery carts and all the fun things.
And then this topic is now something you're talking about.
So can you take us back to the very beginning as to how the
Lord laid this on your heart? What in your life has inspired
you to be a voice for this? Really important.
(06:35):
Topic Yeah, I I know it feels like whiplash for people because
they're like, wait, Greta's posting like pictures of the
Hummingbird in her backyard laying eggs and that building
her nest and then fight porn like what is going on with this
woman. But I think there's actually a
really important lesson there, because what I try to encourage
(06:58):
parents to do is to say that pornography and talking to your
kids about it shouldn't be this big, looming, dark, overwhelming
thing that we have to sit down and have this terribly
frightening talk with our kids. Instead, it should be like, hey,
wow, look at this beautiful nestthat that this Hummingbird is
(07:20):
making and and that she's built it with her beak.
Like, isn't that incredible? God's design?
And wow, just like he designed our bodies, every part of our
bodies for a purpose, and our bodies are made in his image.
And Oh, yeah, remember we talkedabout pornography, and it's
something that is bad and it takes and distorts God's good
things. Well, yeah, I just want you to
(07:41):
remember that. So.
So it sounds crazy to juxtapose those two things.
But but really, when we normalize the conversation of
pornography with our kids, it becomes less scary.
It takes away the power of pornography and instead gives
the power back to God, which he has the power anyways, right?
(08:02):
Just wants us to think that he has the power.
He doesn't. God has the power and it reminds
us that this should be a normal conversation in our families
because we want to protect them.This was not always the case for
me though. Like I didn't always feel
comfortable having these kinds of conversations.
And So what was the what was thecatalyst to that that made you
(08:24):
realize we need to have these conversations?
These are real. You know, part of parenting is
pointing out the beautiful Hummingbird, but it's also
talking about these hard things.So what was the catalyst that
got you to this place? For for us, it was actually
dealing with pornography in our marriage.
My husband, I don't know about 15 years ago, came to me and
(08:47):
confessed that he had a pornography addiction and had an
affair. And unbeknownst to me, it is
very common for people who are using pornography regularly to
pursue additional unwanted sexual behavior because
pornography trains your brain tobe unsatisfied with what you
(09:07):
have with the normal right. And so that catapulted both of
us onto the road of recovery andhealing and praise God,
redemption. But also it really brought us
face to face with how unequippedwe were ourselves to deal with
(09:28):
this kind of thing in our own lives as kids, as young adults,
as a young married couple, but also how would we deal with it
with our kids? And so for me, part of my
healing journey was really helping other families first
helping my own family. Like, how are we going to talk
to our kids about this? How are we going to give them
tools? And then I wanted to help other
(09:51):
people. And so I started talking about
it and I didn't share our story at first.
We weren't ready for that. And that took years to get to
that place. But finally, 15 years later,
here's the book, and we're readyto share with everybody how
parents can give their kids the tools they need to protect them
from pornography. That's incredible.
(10:13):
I when I read that story in yourbook, it just spoke to me like
this is an example of using the really hard things in life and
the things that the devil means to be the end of our story and
allowing God to redeem it and use it for good and for helping
others and for putting the enemyback in his place and putting
God back on the throne, right? And putting him back in control.
(10:33):
And at the end of the day, the devil doesn't win, right?
He doesn't write the last. Last chapter you said, I kept
trying to think for this interview, you have this little
line that you say about the lastthe things don't end in ash.
What is it? What do you think?
It's a quote from Elizabeth Elliott, who, you know, is a
hero of the faith. And she said of one thing I am
sure God's story does not end inashes.
(10:56):
And I have come to that quote for so long because.
I heard. You say that and what?
It is encouraging it such an example of what of what?
I mean, the enemy could have used this to knock you down,
knock your kids down, knock downthe future generations of your
family. And instead, because of your
faith in the Lord and your understanding of that, he's
going to use it and is using it for incredible good.
(11:18):
And for me and for, I hope the audience, it inspires us all
that we're all going to have really hard things.
I mean, the reality is, is we all have really hard things,
whether it's what you went through, whether it's the death
of a child, whatever it is, but that it's just inspiring that we
can take those hard things and use them for God's glory and for
God's good. So that that is so cool.
So I kind of want to dive into the nitty gritty and how do we
(11:41):
talk to our kids about this? But I used to think that it was
just about keeping things from our kids and, you know, kind of
keeping them behind the wall of protection, right.
And I will never forget like, 'cause we were, we're a very
kind of locked down family. We don't have the screens, we
don't have that, whatever. But I'll never forget when my
(12:01):
son was three, we were at our cousin's house and it was
Thanksgiving and all the kids were in the other room watching
the Thanksgiving parade. And the grown-ups were in the
room talking. And he comes running out, three
years old. Mama, Mama, they're watching
inappropriate things in the other room.
And of course my stomach sinks because I'm like, Oh my
goodness, the cousins are in there.
But I mean, I know the cousins are good.
And I'm like, it was the parade.And I said, well, honey, what,
(12:24):
what were they seeing? And he said, Mama, it was the
parade. And they the the man said.
Up next, the Barenaked Ladies. It was so darling.
How sweet that he came to you totell.
Him, yes. And I, for the younger
generation, The Barenaked Ladiesis a band from days ago, and
that was the band name. So they were up next on the
(12:44):
stage to sing. But it freaked him out and it
panicked him. And I have to tell you, Greta,
it wasn't because I had preparedhim for that.
I hadn't. I I mean, he's three.
I hadn't at all, but there was something in him that was a
check. There was something in him that
was a check. And then a couple years later,
well, quite a few years later, we were, I told him to look
something up on thesaurus.com because the word wasn't in our
(13:07):
thesaurus, right? And so I said, oh, if you go to
thesaurus.com thinking what a safe website, for goodness sake,
it's thesaurus.com. And he comes running out and he
said, mom, there's a picture on the side.
And I went in and lo and behold,there was a picture, an
advertisement on the side of thesaurus.com.
And Greta, it hit me right then.And I said, I can't put them
(13:29):
behind this wall of safety. Like it is my job as a mom to do
the best I can put the enemy. I mean, that there's a way in.
And so part of what I'm learningfrom you is part of protecting
them is preparing them. It's not just sheltering them,
but it's preparing them well. And so can you talk a little bit
about why it is so important that we do this really, really
(13:53):
hard thing and talk to our kids about this?
Yeah, those are phenomenal examples.
I feel like I I could just have you speak about this because
you're so informed, but the reality?
I just read this really great book that we'll talk about a
little bit later, so I'm more informed now than I was.
Well, thank you, but the realityis exactly what you said the the
(14:17):
porn industry is coming after all of us.
Like their their goal, their desire is to get anyone,
including kids hooked on porn. Like that's what they do.
That's why they exist. So you are you're saying it this
is not just our kids are stumbling upon it.
(14:37):
It's out there and it's accidental.
They are actually intentionally coming after our kid.
Yeah, I mean, think about it like if a if there's a pop up ad
that comes alongside of, you know, thesaurus.com, that's not
an accident. Those things are put there in
place. Like the whole industry of the
Internet and especially of anything like, you know,
(14:58):
advertisements, apps, like they want to get our attention.
They are, that's why they exist.They want to get our attention.
They want us to click on it. They want us to spend time
there. The porn industry is the same.
They want to get our attention, they want us to click on it.
They want us to go down the rabbit hole and to become their
consumer. Because when you become a
(15:19):
consumer of porn, then you potentially could be a lifelong
customer. And, and so the younger they can
get someone, the better for them.
And I think that that's important to know because it,
it's, it validates what you weresaying, Abby, that we can't just
say, well, I will make sure my kids aren't on screens and
(15:41):
they'll be just fine. Or I will make sure we have
every parental control on our screens And we have a router and
we've done all these things. But the reality is the router or
the parental control or your no screen policy is going to fail.
At some point, our kids will be exposed to porn.
(16:01):
At some point accidentally, somebody else shows them.
It might not be till they're 20 and they leave home and they
have to do, you know, use screens for work or a college
class or whatever it might be. But at some point they will be
exposed to pornography. And so we have to equip them for
that. We have to give them the tools
(16:24):
so that they know what they're seeing and what to do when they
see it. They know to reject it because
it's not good for them and it's not of God.
I love that and the other, well,I hate that and I love that at
the same time. That's this topic, right?
The other thing that I am learning with these with these
and we can talk a little bit more about this later of like
(16:45):
practical things, you know, but with some of these protectors or
like I'm even thinking on on thetelevision, you can say, oh,
it's only kid friendly shows. Well, somebody else's idea of
what's appropriate for my child is very different than what I
deem appropriate. Obviously thesaurus.com thought
that that was not a bad, you know, thing to put on there.
They thought it was completely acceptable.
(17:07):
And so I learned that very quickly.
I thought, oh, everybody has thesame values that we do, right?
And then you realize, oh, a kid appropriate show in their mind
is not a kid appropriate show inmy mind.
And so that really, that really opened my eyes.
Yeah. Can I add one thing to it also?
Like if we understand that our that our culture is a pornified
(17:27):
culture and that means like it'snormalizing and minimizing porn
so that an image that, you know,people would be like, well, it
wasn't a pornographic image, right?
It was probably just like, you know, a seductive image or it
showed a lot of cleavage or whatever.
But if we understand that it constantly exposing ourselves or
(17:48):
our kids to those kinds of images desensitizes us so that
we do just be like, Oh yeah, that's no big deal.
Like, oh, that's normal. No, it's not normal.
Like we need to to recognize that our kids are growing up in
a culture that wants them to be desensitized to soft porn, to
images that are highly sexualized so that it doesn't
(18:09):
bother them. And then you're like, oh, maybe
even insights A craving for moreor we ignore that so that when
we they see the something that is more hardcore, then they're
like, Oh yeah, that actually caught my attention.
The other stuff didn't. That's what parents need to be
aware of, because when we recognize that, we'll be more
(18:31):
passionate about protecting our kids.
I love that. I love that.
OK, we're going to take a quick break and then when we come
back, we're going to we're goingto dive into some what we're
going to make sure that by the end of this, we're going to
leave you guys with some tips and some tools, but we're going
to talk more about all what's behind it.
We will be right back, just one moment.
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(20:00):
term that I want you to dive a little bit more because it's
familiar. I mean, I, I read the book.
I know what it means now, but help parents that maybe this is
all brand new. I mean, honestly, I bet you most
of our listeners are just jaw drop, eyes wide open going.
I didn't even think of this yet,right?
What do you mean by, and you dive, you dove into it a little
bit, but give us an example in aday-to-day of what a pornified
(20:21):
culture, how that would infiltrate, say a Christian
homeschool 'cause we're, and we're talking to homeschoolers
who thinks that no, this wouldn't happen.
Like what are the little bits inthe little, the little ways?
I mean, that's how the enemy works, right?
He doesn't just come in and overtake.
It's little by little by little.So explain a little bit by what
you mean with this pornified culture thing.
(20:42):
OK, so this is an example that happened to us not too long ago.
It wasn't on a screen in our house.
Nobody who saw it on a phone. So, you know, this is for the
family is like, well, we're not watching.
We're not watching TV. We don't have a TV, so we didn't
see the commercial. We're careful of screens.
Like, you know, nobody just has free access to the Internet.
(21:02):
I mean, my older kids do, but they're 21 and 19.
So we're talking like when they were little.
Definitely not. But we were driving and we were
driving past a fast food restaurant and in the window
they had a big sticker and it was a picture of a ship and like
a tortilla chip. And it was pixelated and fuzzed
(21:22):
out, which that immediately tells you this is giving you the
impression that this is an inappropriate image.
My kids know exactly what this is.
Even my youngest, who was, you know, 12 at the time.
And when they were little, they would have understood it as
well. And then the tagline for the
chip that was pixelated and fuzzed out was eat Naked.
(21:43):
And what they wanted you to understand was they were saying
like, oh, you don't have to dip the chips in salsa or queso.
You could just eat the chip naked.
But of course, what are they trying to get you to think
about? And my kids immediately picked
up on it. They're like, oh, they're trying
to get us to think about being naked instead of just eating
(22:05):
chips. Because you see the word naked
and your eyes go to it instantly, right?
Sex sells. And so when our our kids are
exposed to this kind of imaging,and I have like so many more
examples of that, that they're exposed to these kinds of ideas,
this kinds of these kinds of images, this kind of marketing,
(22:26):
what it does is it shows us that, like I said, sex cells,
we're sexualizing everything, even dipping chips and salsa,
like everywhere. And, and it, like I said, it
desensitizes us and our kids to this idea of pornography
sexualizing everything. It's normal.
(22:47):
It's no big deal. It's funny, we can just look at
it and then just keep going as if nothing happened.
OK, that makes such sense. And yeah, that wasn't a screen,
right? That wasn't anything that you
could have protected them from because it's right there on a
billboard. And I've just.
I've been thinking about that, the desensitized thing.
Isn't it funny when you become aparent?
(23:08):
Like I have a teenage daughter now and I'm like, Oh my
goodness, this just opened up our world of so many great
movies from the 2000s. All the mother daughter chick
flicks we can watch like, you know, while you were sleeping
and you've got mail. And so we turn them on and
Greta, I'm like, this whole movie's about sex, like, and I'm
like, why would I watch that in my 20s?
(23:30):
Was I not as appalled? And I realized because I was
desensitized because I didn't even think about it.
But now that I have a kid next to me, right?
Once you watch a movie with a kid, all of a sudden you see all
the things that you didn't notice and pay attention to and,
and that desensitize desensitization is so, so real.
And it's so evident to me now that I'm more sensitive to it
(23:51):
and how much I, I used to not be.
And so that is such a good. So you're saying now this is my
question. So you're saying you're talking
about this all the time with your kids, right?
Like that's what I hear you saying.
So my first question is how early, right?
How early, because most parents think, oh, as they get closer
to, to puberty, we're going to have the one and done talk.
(24:13):
We're going to open the book, gothrough the thing.
And then I I can check that off my list and we can move on to
the next thing. So I want you to share and hit a
little bit about how early are you doing this?
And then what you're kind of saying is this isn't A1 and done
right, This is a non-stop talking to our kids about this.
Yes. So here's the thing, first time
(24:34):
exposure, typically what research is showing us and what
I hear from parents. So it's not just like research,
but like actual parents talking to me.
First time exposure to pornography, almost always this
is accidental is somewhere between the ages of eight and
11. So it's young, right, because
(24:57):
kids are on screens a lot and that's where first time exposure
generally is happening and it doesn't mean that it's always
their screen. It also could be their, you
know, at practice for baseball and somebody on their team has a
screen or they're at church or ahomeschool outing.
You know, there is no like, Oh well, just because it's church
(25:20):
or just because it's homeschooled or we know
everybody on the baseball team that they're safe.
You just don't because everybodyhas different screen rules.
Everybody is equally open to thetemptation of pornography.
A. Good point.
So we can't fall into this. My kids don't have screens
because they do have billboards,right?
And they do, like you said, I'venever, you know, a lot of
(25:42):
parents don't think, wow, the kid next to them has a screen.
That's all. That's all you need to see
things that don't need to be seen, right?
So since first time exposure is happening that young, the ideal
is to talk to our kids about pornography before first time
exposure so that they know what to do when they see it.
And, and this is really hard forparents to wrap their heads
(26:03):
around because you're like, well, I don't want to talk to my
young kid about it, but but think you are actually equipping
them. If you talk to them before
exposure, then they know what todo when they see it instead of
being paralyzed and being like, I don't know what to do with
what I'm seeing right now. I can't process it feeling like
deep in shame from what they've seen or feeling curious and
(26:26):
going back to look for more because they didn't know that
they shouldn't. Not knowing that they should
talk to you. Like we're leaving them
completely unequipped if we don't say anything, right?
So ideally you want to talk to your kids.
I say before the age of 8 for that first conversation because
you want to talk to them before they're accidentally exposed to
(26:49):
pornography. That makes such sense.
And I, I heard so long time ago,my pastor's wife, we were
driving through, I mean, I'm raising my kids in this
generation, right? And so we're driving through a
city and there's people, guys holding guys hands and girls
kissing girls. And I have a 5 year old.
And I'm like, well, I guess we get to talk about that now,
right? And I remember at one point my
(27:11):
pastor's wife was like, oh, thatis so early.
You should never be talking because she's from a different
generation, right? They didn't need to.
But I learned very quickly, we have to.
We have to. And it, it reminded me of like
when we're outdoors, I'm going to show my kids the poisonous
berries not to eat before they eat them.
I'm not gonna let them eat them and then be like, oh, sorry, you
might die now. I forgot to tell you where I was
(27:34):
just waiting. I didn't wanna scare you.
Yeah, totally. I did scare you and I didn't,
you know, I didn't think about it.
And so it's really no different.It's just that it's just that
this word porn scares us. And so we hold back from
sharing, but it's it's no different than the poisonous
Berry. So so you're saying before the
age of 8, but now everybody is saying how so?
(27:54):
OK. So like it is really easy to be
like, see that Berry, see that color, see that Bush that will
kill you. That's not hard when you tell us
that we need to be talking to our kids about the P word before
8, Greta, tell us how and tell us why we we've debunked that.
It's not scary. It's life saving, but give us a
practical OK, Do I just walk up to my kid and be like, here's a
(28:15):
picture of porn. Don't ever look at this again.
Right. I'm assuming not too bad the
way. OK, sure.
OK, so so help us help us understand how this works.
Well, that I will say the first,the first conversation is going
to feel challenging. Like you might, your stomach
might be upset, you might feel like really wildly nervous.
(28:35):
But I want to start off by giving you a piece of assurance
for our kids, the the word pornography doesn't carry the
weight and the heaviness that itdoes for us because we are, we
have a lifetime of maybe our ownpain with pornography or fear or
(28:56):
shame, all of these things that it means to us, maybe even feels
like to us because we've had these negative experiences.
But for our kids, for the most part, they're, they haven't been
exposed to it, they've never heard of it.
They don't carry the weight. So we're not saddling them with
this heaviness. We're actually empowering them
(29:17):
to protect them from that heaviness that we feel.
And then that pause on that for a moment, like we're, we're
putting the weirdness into it, right?
We're putting, we're bringing the fear into it.
They don't have it. Yeah.
And and that's important becauseit should alleviate some of this
heavy fear that we feel having this conversation.
(29:40):
And and then the second thing I want to say is I understand that
it is difficult to have this conversation.
And in the perfect world that God created that was free of
sin, we wouldn't have to talk tochildren about pornography.
This shouldn't be like, I fully recognize this should not be, it
is not God's plan. It's not good.
(30:04):
But we live in a fallen world. And because we live in a fallen
world and we live in 2025 and pornography is real and it is a
threat to our children, we have to be proactive.
And so I recognize the weight, Irecognize the fear and the
heaviness, but God is still bigger than pornography and we
(30:25):
can step into His power to have that first conversation with our
kids. And this is what it could look
like if you have a 7 year old, let's say your 7 year old
daughter in your baking cookies or you're sitting in the car.
Doesn't have to be like you sit down face to face in the living
room like we are going to have avery serious talk now.
(30:45):
In fact, it should be as light hearted as possible while you're
doing everyday real life things.Sweetie, I need to tell you
something about staying safe, especially around screens.
And there's this thing that you can see on screens and it's
called pornography. Pornography is pictures or
movies of people who have no clothes on.
(31:07):
We can see all of their private parts.
We know that. We do not show other people our
private parts. They don't see ours.
We don't see theirs. And if you ever saw a picture or
a movie like that on a screen, like you're using mommy's phone
or you're on, you know, a tabletplaying a game or doing
(31:31):
something for school. Source.com.
Source.com you're, you know, on a website to draw pictures
because you, you know, you wanted to draw some fun
pictures, anything like that. Or if somebody else has a screen
and they show you a picture on their screen on a phone or a
computer or ATV, here's what I want you to do.
(31:53):
I want you to turn the phone over, turn off the tablet, or
say to the person who's showing that on their screen.
I want you to say to them, I don't want to look at that.
And then I want you to walk away.
Walk away from the screen. Whatever screen it is, you don't
have to hold it. You don't have to bring it to
me. You walk away from the person
and you come find me or daddy orsome other safe grown up and you
(32:16):
say, I think I saw pornography. Will you help me?
And we will help you. We will not be mad at you.
We want to help you deal with what you saw because we love you
and we want to keep you safe. This is your screen safety plan.
That conversation is like 2 minutes long.
You're not giving them a ton of information.
(32:37):
You're giving them the least amount of information to stay
the most safe. And you're giving them a
definition so they know what it is they can identify it.
You're giving them a plan of what to do with actionable steps
where they move away from the thing that is dangerous.
And then you're telling them talk to me because that opens
(32:58):
the doors of communication. It strips away fear and shame
and says I am here to protect you.
I want to keep you safe from thepoisonous berries from the hot
stove. I want to keep you safe from
porn because that's my job. I want keep you safe.
That does not feel scary. That doesn't see, I knew you
were the woman for this job, Greta, because that doesn't feel
scared. That feels so doable.
(33:19):
I just wrote down the actionable.
So you're calling your screen safety plan and I just wrote
down stop, walk and talk like that.
If I could just those those things aren't scary, right?
Because we teach them that with anything right?
If there's a car in the middle of the road, you going too fast,
you stop, right? You walk the other way and then
you come tell mom, right? These are things we're already
teaching our kids. We're just carrying it over into
(33:41):
something that is is a life or death, death situation.
So I and we have to end for thisweek and we're going to be back.
But what a great, I mean, what agreat thing to land on is just,
is this isn't scary. And, and Greta's showing us how
this is just like what we talk to our kids about everything
else. We're just bringing it into this
realm and it's not scary. And our desire, our Mama bear
(34:03):
desire is to protect our kids, right?
And, and the reality is, is evenif it is scary, we do it scared,
right, because we love our kids that much.
So that can't be an excuse because someday we're not going
to want to grow up and and have a kid who's a addicted to porn
and go, well, I was too scared to talk to them about it, right.
That would be way worse than doing the scary thing.
So Greta, before we sign off forthe week, will you tell people
(34:26):
where they can find you and where they can just be
encouraged by you on a regular basis?
Yeah. You can find my book at anywhere
books are sold. Amazon, you know, Barnes and
Noble, wherever it's out there. Please, please get it.
Please read it and help your family.
And then if you want to hang outwith me online, I'm on
(34:50):
Instagram. That's the only social media I
have time for. And so look me up.
You can just Google my name, Greta Eskridge, and I'll come up
on Instagram. My website will come up.
I'm all over the place and I would love to hang out with you.
Oh, and I have a podcast, the Greta Eskridge podcast.
I always forget about it. There's too much to keep track
(35:11):
of. I'm out there.
And she speaks live at conventions.
So if that's true, can meet thiswoman and hug her and see that
smile in real life, you are going to be so blessed.
And the book that she talked about, we are going to share the
book and talk about the book specifically at the end of next
weeks episode. So Greta, just tell us what is
the book called and where can wefind it?
(35:31):
It's Time to talk to your kids about porn is the title of the
book. You can't forget that.
And it's, yeah, it's everywhere books are sold, so and.
Strangely, it is the cutest cover.
My little girl came in my room and it was on my night stand and
she goes, that's the funnest looking book ever.
And I thought right now that is an open door.
It was an open door for me to say, Hey, do you want to know
what this book is about? This book is a book to help
(35:53):
mommy better protect you, right?So it's a super fun I, I, I
shouldn't say it's a fun book. It's a fun cover of a very
important book. So fine, Greta, as you know, you
guys can find me periodically here at the Schoolhouse Rock
podcast along with a bunch of other amazing hosts that you'll
have week to week. And you can also find me on any
(36:14):
social media at Called to the Top Abby Rinella.
So we will see you right back here.
Same time, same place next week with Greta, where we'll dive
into the same topic again. See you soon.
You're listening to the biblical.
Family Network. Hey, I'm Miki and I'm Will and
we're the Co host of the CultureProof podcast.
(36:36):
We want to invite you to join usevery week as we discuss what's
happening in the world and then filter those happenings through
a decidedly biblical lens. There are many questions,
especially when we see what's happening in our culture today,
but the answers are found withinthe Word of God, so that's where
we want to look. Amen.
When we resist those cultural trends that rival the truth.
(36:57):
We remain culture proof. It's not just a conversation for
the men because pornography is not simply a male issue.
It impacts men, it impacts women, it impacts children.
It is a human issue. So therefore all of us need to
address it. Porn is a twisting of God's good
design and therefore we want to reject it because it's not His
(37:19):
best for us. It's actually what Satan is
using to try to trick us and give us a counterfeit.
And those conversations span thewhole life of your child.
Obviously you're not having those conversations with your 5
year old, but you're laying the groundwork so that when your
kids, 15 or 25, you can have those conversations and prepare
(37:39):
them for God's good gift.
This shouldn't be like, I fully recognize this should not be.
It is not God's plan. It's not good.
But we live in a fallen world. And because we live in a fallen
world and we live in 2025 and pornography is real and it is a
threat to our children, we have to be proactive.
(00:21):
Hey everybody, welcome back to the Schoolhouse Rock podcast.
I'm Abby Rinella and I am so excited to be back with you as
your host today. And I have the most exciting
guest today. I cannot wait to introduce you.
But first, I would like to thankour sponsor, BJU Press
Homeschool. I want to say thank you to BJU
Press Homeschool for sponsoring this podcast.
(00:42):
Their materials won't just equipped you for a successful
homeschool journey. They will prepare your child for
a future full of possibilities so that your child can
confidently move beyond homeschool, ready for whatever
God has next. They've crafted their curriculum
to give you the tools you need, and they're rooted in a solid
biblical foundation. BJU Press Homeschool offers
lessons that encourage critical thinking skills as well as
(01:05):
activities and lessons that support multi sensory learning
and the unique learning styles of your children.
And they have both online and parent LED formats to fit your
lifestyle. BJU Press Homeschool will
encourage a love of learning in your child and they'll be with
you every step of the way. Visit the I'm at
bjupresshomeschool.com. That's bjupresshomeschool.com.
(01:28):
Okay, everybody, we are so excited to have you and I cannot
wait to introduce you to my friend.
And I have to say she's also a bit of my hero.
And and you would know her as ifyou're online, you know her as
ma and PA modern on social media.
And this is my friend, Greta Eskridge.
Hi, Greta. Hi, how are you?
(01:49):
I'm good. How are you?
I'm good too. Good, Greta wrote has written 2
amazing books and I2 right Greta?
Three, actually. Three.
OK, so we have adventuring together, which was absolutely
one of my favorite. And then tell me before this,
this new one, what's the other one?
The second one came out two years later and it's called
Advent. Oh, I'm say the wrong title
(02:11):
because that's where my brain is.
It's called 100 Days of Adventure and it's a book for
kids. Oh, OK, awesome, awesome.
Well, it's going on my Amazon list right now.
And so Greta is a speaker and just, I've always more than a
speaker. To me, she's just an encourager.
She is like that friend next door that you can call, which by
the way, I have and just talk toabout anything.
(02:34):
And she is a wealth of information, but more than
anything, she's going to point you to Jesus and everything she
says. And that's what I most love
about her. So, Greta, would you introduce
us to your family and any of theother fun facts that maybe I've
missed about you? Sure.
Well first, fun fact. I'm a second generation
homeschool mom. So I was homeschooled as a kid
(02:57):
back in the 80s when hardly anyone else was.
When we started, there was one other homeschool family in our
town. Oh my goodness.
And I loved homeschooling so much that when I first met my
husband, I was 18 years old, andI told him on our second date,
By the way, when I have kids, I'm homeschooling them.
(03:17):
So if you're not a fan of homeschooling, we shouldn't keep
seeing each other. We shouldn't order the main
course, we'll just stick to the appetizer.
And here we are like we've been married for 27 years and we've
homeschooled our kids from the beginning.
So we have 4 kids and two are done with school, two more are
(03:39):
are finishing up. I've got a 2119 almost 17 and
13. So we love homeschooling and we
also, you know, we love being outside.
We live in Southern California and in between home schooling
and, you know, running my home and all that stuff and being at
(04:03):
the beach as much as possible. I also am a writer, a speaker,
and a podcaster. And I love to encourage parents
to cultivate connection with their kids and to help parents
keep their kids safe in the online world that we live in
now. I love that, you know, it's so
funny. The last three guests I've had
(04:24):
on are all second generation homeschoolers.
And what does I mean that tells you so much.
It works, right? And it doesn't just work to go
with the humdrum of life. Like you guys are making
differences in the world. You're, you're actually, you
know, making Kingdom differences, which is so cool.
So today, I mean, I, I have loved your, your, I mean, you
know me and, and the audience knows me.
I love to adventure like this iswhat.
(04:47):
I feel like I should not talk about adventure with you because
you put me to shame. No, not at all.
But that is something that you and I have in common that I
think connects us also is just our deep desire to connect with
our kids through adventure. But you have actually recently
written another book and we're going to talk about the topic of
that book. And it's it doesn't feel as fun
and light hearted as adventuring.
(05:10):
And it's actually a little bit of a hard topic, but it is, I
would say, one of the most important topics that we can
talk about. And there is, in my opinion, no
better person to dive into this hard topic than you because
there's something about you, Greta.
God has given you a gift to takethe scary out of things.
And you have a way of bringing an urgency to this topic.
(05:32):
But but matching it with an easeand a piece that makes it feel
doable to parents and you're you're just a gift from God in
this topic. And and so the topic today.
And I just want to tell parents,if you have littles listening,
if you have kids around you, maybe take a pause and pre
listen to this episode. So we're just going to give you
(05:53):
a minute to to go give kids a snack and then you can come back
and listen. Good plan.
Because the topic today we're going to talk about is
pornography and the importance of talking about pornography to
our children. And so Greta, I want to, before
we dive into that, I want you totake us back to the very
beginning because you're kind ofknown for adventuring and wild
(06:14):
and fun and connecting with kidsand like strolling them through
the grocery aisles in grocery carts and all the fun things.
And then this topic is now something you're talking about.
So can you take us back to the very beginning as to how the
Lord laid this on your heart? What in your life has inspired
you to be a voice for this? Really important.
(06:35):
Topic Yeah, I I know it feels like whiplash for people because
they're like, wait, Greta's posting like pictures of the
Hummingbird in her backyard laying eggs and that building
her nest and then fight porn like what is going on with this
woman. But I think there's actually a
really important lesson there, because what I try to encourage
(06:58):
parents to do is to say that pornography and talking to your
kids about it shouldn't be this big, looming, dark, overwhelming
thing that we have to sit down and have this terribly
frightening talk with our kids. Instead, it should be like, hey,
wow, look at this beautiful nestthat that this Hummingbird is
(07:20):
making and and that she's built it with her beak.
Like, isn't that incredible? God's design?
And wow, just like he designed our bodies, every part of our
bodies for a purpose, and our bodies are made in his image.
And Oh, yeah, remember we talkedabout pornography, and it's
something that is bad and it takes and distorts God's good
things. Well, yeah, I just want you to
(07:41):
remember that. So.
So it sounds crazy to juxtapose those two things.
But but really, when we normalize the conversation of
pornography with our kids, it becomes less scary.
It takes away the power of pornography and instead gives
the power back to God, which he has the power anyways, right?
(08:02):
Just wants us to think that he has the power.
He doesn't. God has the power and it reminds
us that this should be a normal conversation in our families
because we want to protect them.This was not always the case for
me though. Like I didn't always feel
comfortable having these kinds of conversations.
And So what was the what was thecatalyst to that that made you
(08:24):
realize we need to have these conversations?
These are real. You know, part of parenting is
pointing out the beautiful Hummingbird, but it's also
talking about these hard things.So what was the catalyst that
got you to this place? For for us, it was actually
dealing with pornography in our marriage.
My husband, I don't know about 15 years ago, came to me and
(08:47):
confessed that he had a pornography addiction and had an
affair. And unbeknownst to me, it is
very common for people who are using pornography regularly to
pursue additional unwanted sexual behavior because
pornography trains your brain tobe unsatisfied with what you
(09:07):
have with the normal right. And so that catapulted both of
us onto the road of recovery andhealing and praise God,
redemption. But also it really brought us
face to face with how unequippedwe were ourselves to deal with
(09:28):
this kind of thing in our own lives as kids, as young adults,
as a young married couple, but also how would we deal with it
with our kids? And so for me, part of my
healing journey was really helping other families first
helping my own family. Like, how are we going to talk
to our kids about this? How are we going to give them
tools? And then I wanted to help other
(09:51):
people. And so I started talking about
it and I didn't share our story at first.
We weren't ready for that. And that took years to get to
that place. But finally, 15 years later,
here's the book, and we're readyto share with everybody how
parents can give their kids the tools they need to protect them
from pornography. That's incredible.
(10:13):
I when I read that story in yourbook, it just spoke to me like
this is an example of using the really hard things in life and
the things that the devil means to be the end of our story and
allowing God to redeem it and use it for good and for helping
others and for putting the enemyback in his place and putting
God back on the throne, right? And putting him back in control.
(10:33):
And at the end of the day, the devil doesn't win, right?
He doesn't write the last. Last chapter you said, I kept
trying to think for this interview, you have this little
line that you say about the lastthe things don't end in ash.
What is it? What do you think?
It's a quote from Elizabeth Elliott, who, you know, is a
hero of the faith. And she said of one thing I am
sure God's story does not end inashes.
(10:56):
And I have come to that quote for so long because.
I heard. You say that and what?
It is encouraging it such an example of what of what?
I mean, the enemy could have used this to knock you down,
knock your kids down, knock downthe future generations of your
family. And instead, because of your
faith in the Lord and your understanding of that, he's
going to use it and is using it for incredible good.
(11:18):
And for me and for, I hope the audience, it inspires us all
that we're all going to have really hard things.
I mean, the reality is, is we all have really hard things,
whether it's what you went through, whether it's the death
of a child, whatever it is, but that it's just inspiring that we
can take those hard things and use them for God's glory and for
God's good. So that that is so cool.
So I kind of want to dive into the nitty gritty and how do we
(11:41):
talk to our kids about this? But I used to think that it was
just about keeping things from our kids and, you know, kind of
keeping them behind the wall of protection, right.
And I will never forget like, 'cause we were, we're a very
kind of locked down family. We don't have the screens, we
don't have that, whatever. But I'll never forget when my
(12:01):
son was three, we were at our cousin's house and it was
Thanksgiving and all the kids were in the other room watching
the Thanksgiving parade. And the grown-ups were in the
room talking. And he comes running out, three
years old. Mama, Mama, they're watching
inappropriate things in the other room.
And of course my stomach sinks because I'm like, Oh my
goodness, the cousins are in there.
But I mean, I know the cousins are good.
And I'm like, it was the parade.And I said, well, honey, what,
(12:24):
what were they seeing? And he said, Mama, it was the
parade. And they the the man said.
Up next, the Barenaked Ladies. It was so darling.
How sweet that he came to you totell.
Him, yes. And I, for the younger
generation, The Barenaked Ladiesis a band from days ago, and
that was the band name. So they were up next on the
(12:44):
stage to sing. But it freaked him out and it
panicked him. And I have to tell you, Greta,
it wasn't because I had preparedhim for that.
I hadn't. I I mean, he's three.
I hadn't at all, but there was something in him that was a
check. There was something in him that
was a check. And then a couple years later,
well, quite a few years later, we were, I told him to look
something up on thesaurus.com because the word wasn't in our
(13:07):
thesaurus, right? And so I said, oh, if you go to
thesaurus.com thinking what a safe website, for goodness sake,
it's thesaurus.com. And he comes running out and he
said, mom, there's a picture on the side.
And I went in and lo and behold,there was a picture, an
advertisement on the side of thesaurus.com.
And Greta, it hit me right then.And I said, I can't put them
(13:29):
behind this wall of safety. Like it is my job as a mom to do
the best I can put the enemy. I mean, that there's a way in.
And so part of what I'm learningfrom you is part of protecting
them is preparing them. It's not just sheltering them,
but it's preparing them well. And so can you talk a little bit
about why it is so important that we do this really, really
(13:53):
hard thing and talk to our kids about this?
Yeah, those are phenomenal examples.
I feel like I I could just have you speak about this because
you're so informed, but the reality?
I just read this really great book that we'll talk about a
little bit later, so I'm more informed now than I was.
Well, thank you, but the realityis exactly what you said the the
(14:17):
porn industry is coming after all of us.
Like their their goal, their desire is to get anyone,
including kids hooked on porn. Like that's what they do.
That's why they exist. So you are you're saying it this
is not just our kids are stumbling upon it.
(14:37):
It's out there and it's accidental.
They are actually intentionally coming after our kid.
Yeah, I mean, think about it like if a if there's a pop up ad
that comes alongside of, you know, thesaurus.com, that's not
an accident. Those things are put there in
place. Like the whole industry of the
Internet and especially of anything like, you know,
(14:58):
advertisements, apps, like they want to get our attention.
They are, that's why they exist.They want to get our attention.
They want us to click on it. They want us to spend time
there. The porn industry is the same.
They want to get our attention, they want us to click on it.
They want us to go down the rabbit hole and to become their
consumer. Because when you become a
(15:19):
consumer of porn, then you potentially could be a lifelong
customer. And, and so the younger they can
get someone, the better for them.
And I think that that's important to know because it,
it's, it validates what you weresaying, Abby, that we can't just
say, well, I will make sure my kids aren't on screens and
(15:41):
they'll be just fine. Or I will make sure we have
every parental control on our screens And we have a router and
we've done all these things. But the reality is the router or
the parental control or your no screen policy is going to fail.
At some point, our kids will be exposed to porn.
(16:01):
At some point accidentally, somebody else shows them.
It might not be till they're 20 and they leave home and they
have to do, you know, use screens for work or a college
class or whatever it might be. But at some point they will be
exposed to pornography. And so we have to equip them for
that. We have to give them the tools
(16:24):
so that they know what they're seeing and what to do when they
see it. They know to reject it because
it's not good for them and it's not of God.
I love that and the other, well,I hate that and I love that at
the same time. That's this topic, right?
The other thing that I am learning with these with these
and we can talk a little bit more about this later of like
(16:45):
practical things, you know, but with some of these protectors or
like I'm even thinking on on thetelevision, you can say, oh,
it's only kid friendly shows. Well, somebody else's idea of
what's appropriate for my child is very different than what I
deem appropriate. Obviously thesaurus.com thought
that that was not a bad, you know, thing to put on there.
They thought it was completely acceptable.
(17:07):
And so I learned that very quickly.
I thought, oh, everybody has thesame values that we do, right?
And then you realize, oh, a kid appropriate show in their mind
is not a kid appropriate show inmy mind.
And so that really, that really opened my eyes.
Yeah. Can I add one thing to it also?
Like if we understand that our that our culture is a pornified
(17:27):
culture and that means like it'snormalizing and minimizing porn
so that an image that, you know,people would be like, well, it
wasn't a pornographic image, right?
It was probably just like, you know, a seductive image or it
showed a lot of cleavage or whatever.
But if we understand that it constantly exposing ourselves or
(17:48):
our kids to those kinds of images desensitizes us so that
we do just be like, Oh yeah, that's no big deal.
Like, oh, that's normal. No, it's not normal.
Like we need to to recognize that our kids are growing up in
a culture that wants them to be desensitized to soft porn, to
images that are highly sexualized so that it doesn't
(18:09):
bother them. And then you're like, oh, maybe
even insights A craving for moreor we ignore that so that when
we they see the something that is more hardcore, then they're
like, Oh yeah, that actually caught my attention.
The other stuff didn't. That's what parents need to be
aware of, because when we recognize that, we'll be more
(18:31):
passionate about protecting our kids.
I love that. I love that.
OK, we're going to take a quick break and then when we come
back, we're going to we're goingto dive into some what we're
going to make sure that by the end of this, we're going to
leave you guys with some tips and some tools, but we're going
to talk more about all what's behind it.
We will be right back, just one moment.
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(20:00):
term that I want you to dive a little bit more because it's
familiar. I mean, I, I read the book.
I know what it means now, but help parents that maybe this is
all brand new. I mean, honestly, I bet you most
of our listeners are just jaw drop, eyes wide open going.
I didn't even think of this yet,right?
What do you mean by, and you dive, you dove into it a little
bit, but give us an example in aday-to-day of what a pornified
(20:21):
culture, how that would infiltrate, say a Christian
homeschool 'cause we're, and we're talking to homeschoolers
who thinks that no, this wouldn't happen.
Like what are the little bits inthe little, the little ways?
I mean, that's how the enemy works, right?
He doesn't just come in and overtake.
It's little by little by little.So explain a little bit by what
you mean with this pornified culture thing.
(20:42):
OK, so this is an example that happened to us not too long ago.
It wasn't on a screen in our house.
Nobody who saw it on a phone. So, you know, this is for the
family is like, well, we're not watching.
We're not watching TV. We don't have a TV, so we didn't
see the commercial. We're careful of screens.
Like, you know, nobody just has free access to the Internet.
(21:02):
I mean, my older kids do, but they're 21 and 19.
So we're talking like when they were little.
Definitely not. But we were driving and we were
driving past a fast food restaurant and in the window
they had a big sticker and it was a picture of a ship and like
a tortilla chip. And it was pixelated and fuzzed
(21:22):
out, which that immediately tells you this is giving you the
impression that this is an inappropriate image.
My kids know exactly what this is.
Even my youngest, who was, you know, 12 at the time.
And when they were little, they would have understood it as
well. And then the tagline for the
chip that was pixelated and fuzzed out was eat Naked.
(21:43):
And what they wanted you to understand was they were saying
like, oh, you don't have to dip the chips in salsa or queso.
You could just eat the chip naked.
But of course, what are they trying to get you to think
about? And my kids immediately picked
up on it. They're like, oh, they're trying
to get us to think about being naked instead of just eating
(22:05):
chips. Because you see the word naked
and your eyes go to it instantly, right?
Sex sells. And so when our our kids are
exposed to this kind of imaging,and I have like so many more
examples of that, that they're exposed to these kinds of ideas,
this kinds of these kinds of images, this kind of marketing,
(22:26):
what it does is it shows us that, like I said, sex cells,
we're sexualizing everything, even dipping chips and salsa,
like everywhere. And, and it, like I said, it
desensitizes us and our kids to this idea of pornography
sexualizing everything. It's normal.
(22:47):
It's no big deal. It's funny, we can just look at
it and then just keep going as if nothing happened.
OK, that makes such sense. And yeah, that wasn't a screen,
right? That wasn't anything that you
could have protected them from because it's right there on a
billboard. And I've just.
I've been thinking about that, the desensitized thing.
Isn't it funny when you become aparent?
(23:08):
Like I have a teenage daughter now and I'm like, Oh my
goodness, this just opened up our world of so many great
movies from the 2000s. All the mother daughter chick
flicks we can watch like, you know, while you were sleeping
and you've got mail. And so we turn them on and
Greta, I'm like, this whole movie's about sex, like, and I'm
like, why would I watch that in my 20s?
(23:30):
Was I not as appalled? And I realized because I was
desensitized because I didn't even think about it.
But now that I have a kid next to me, right?
Once you watch a movie with a kid, all of a sudden you see all
the things that you didn't notice and pay attention to and,
and that desensitize desensitization is so, so real.
And it's so evident to me now that I'm more sensitive to it
(23:51):
and how much I, I used to not be.
And so that is such a good. So you're saying now this is my
question. So you're saying you're talking
about this all the time with your kids, right?
Like that's what I hear you saying.
So my first question is how early, right?
How early, because most parents think, oh, as they get closer
to, to puberty, we're going to have the one and done talk.
(24:13):
We're going to open the book, gothrough the thing.
And then I I can check that off my list and we can move on to
the next thing. So I want you to share and hit a
little bit about how early are you doing this?
And then what you're kind of saying is this isn't A1 and done
right, This is a non-stop talking to our kids about this.
Yes. So here's the thing, first time
(24:34):
exposure, typically what research is showing us and what
I hear from parents. So it's not just like research,
but like actual parents talking to me.
First time exposure to pornography, almost always this
is accidental is somewhere between the ages of eight and
11. So it's young, right, because
(24:57):
kids are on screens a lot and that's where first time exposure
generally is happening and it doesn't mean that it's always
their screen. It also could be their, you
know, at practice for baseball and somebody on their team has a
screen or they're at church or ahomeschool outing.
You know, there is no like, Oh well, just because it's church
(25:20):
or just because it's homeschooled or we know
everybody on the baseball team that they're safe.
You just don't because everybodyhas different screen rules.
Everybody is equally open to thetemptation of pornography.
A. Good point.
So we can't fall into this. My kids don't have screens
because they do have billboards,right?
And they do, like you said, I'venever, you know, a lot of
(25:42):
parents don't think, wow, the kid next to them has a screen.
That's all. That's all you need to see
things that don't need to be seen, right?
So since first time exposure is happening that young, the ideal
is to talk to our kids about pornography before first time
exposure so that they know what to do when they see it.
And, and this is really hard forparents to wrap their heads
(26:03):
around because you're like, well, I don't want to talk to my
young kid about it, but but think you are actually equipping
them. If you talk to them before
exposure, then they know what todo when they see it instead of
being paralyzed and being like, I don't know what to do with
what I'm seeing right now. I can't process it feeling like
deep in shame from what they've seen or feeling curious and
(26:26):
going back to look for more because they didn't know that
they shouldn't. Not knowing that they should
talk to you. Like we're leaving them
completely unequipped if we don't say anything, right?
So ideally you want to talk to your kids.
I say before the age of 8 for that first conversation because
you want to talk to them before they're accidentally exposed to
(26:49):
pornography. That makes such sense.
And I, I heard so long time ago,my pastor's wife, we were
driving through, I mean, I'm raising my kids in this
generation, right? And so we're driving through a
city and there's people, guys holding guys hands and girls
kissing girls. And I have a 5 year old.
And I'm like, well, I guess we get to talk about that now,
right? And I remember at one point my
(27:11):
pastor's wife was like, oh, thatis so early.
You should never be talking because she's from a different
generation, right? They didn't need to.
But I learned very quickly, we have to.
We have to. And it, it reminded me of like
when we're outdoors, I'm going to show my kids the poisonous
berries not to eat before they eat them.
I'm not gonna let them eat them and then be like, oh, sorry, you
might die now. I forgot to tell you where I was
(27:34):
just waiting. I didn't wanna scare you.
Yeah, totally. I did scare you and I didn't,
you know, I didn't think about it.
And so it's really no different.It's just that it's just that
this word porn scares us. And so we hold back from
sharing, but it's it's no different than the poisonous
Berry. So so you're saying before the
age of 8, but now everybody is saying how so?
(27:54):
OK. So like it is really easy to be
like, see that Berry, see that color, see that Bush that will
kill you. That's not hard when you tell us
that we need to be talking to our kids about the P word before
8, Greta, tell us how and tell us why we we've debunked that.
It's not scary. It's life saving, but give us a
practical OK, Do I just walk up to my kid and be like, here's a
(28:15):
picture of porn. Don't ever look at this again.
Right. I'm assuming not too bad the
way. OK, sure.
OK, so so help us help us understand how this works.
Well, that I will say the first,the first conversation is going
to feel challenging. Like you might, your stomach
might be upset, you might feel like really wildly nervous.
(28:35):
But I want to start off by giving you a piece of assurance
for our kids, the the word pornography doesn't carry the
weight and the heaviness that itdoes for us because we are, we
have a lifetime of maybe our ownpain with pornography or fear or
(28:56):
shame, all of these things that it means to us, maybe even feels
like to us because we've had these negative experiences.
But for our kids, for the most part, they're, they haven't been
exposed to it, they've never heard of it.
They don't carry the weight. So we're not saddling them with
this heaviness. We're actually empowering them
(29:17):
to protect them from that heaviness that we feel.
And then that pause on that for a moment, like we're, we're
putting the weirdness into it, right?
We're putting, we're bringing the fear into it.
They don't have it. Yeah.
And and that's important becauseit should alleviate some of this
heavy fear that we feel having this conversation.
(29:40):
And and then the second thing I want to say is I understand that
it is difficult to have this conversation.
And in the perfect world that God created that was free of
sin, we wouldn't have to talk tochildren about pornography.
This shouldn't be like, I fully recognize this should not be, it
is not God's plan. It's not good.
(30:04):
But we live in a fallen world. And because we live in a fallen
world and we live in 2025 and pornography is real and it is a
threat to our children, we have to be proactive.
And so I recognize the weight, Irecognize the fear and the
heaviness, but God is still bigger than pornography and we
(30:25):
can step into His power to have that first conversation with our
kids. And this is what it could look
like if you have a 7 year old, let's say your 7 year old
daughter in your baking cookies or you're sitting in the car.
Doesn't have to be like you sit down face to face in the living
room like we are going to have avery serious talk now.
(30:45):
In fact, it should be as light hearted as possible while you're
doing everyday real life things.Sweetie, I need to tell you
something about staying safe, especially around screens.
And there's this thing that you can see on screens and it's
called pornography. Pornography is pictures or
movies of people who have no clothes on.
(31:07):
We can see all of their private parts.
We know that. We do not show other people our
private parts. They don't see ours.
We don't see theirs. And if you ever saw a picture or
a movie like that on a screen, like you're using mommy's phone
or you're on, you know, a tabletplaying a game or doing
(31:31):
something for school. Source.com.
Source.com you're, you know, on a website to draw pictures
because you, you know, you wanted to draw some fun
pictures, anything like that. Or if somebody else has a screen
and they show you a picture on their screen on a phone or a
computer or ATV, here's what I want you to do.
(31:53):
I want you to turn the phone over, turn off the tablet, or
say to the person who's showing that on their screen.
I want you to say to them, I don't want to look at that.
And then I want you to walk away.
Walk away from the screen. Whatever screen it is, you don't
have to hold it. You don't have to bring it to
me. You walk away from the person
and you come find me or daddy orsome other safe grown up and you
(32:16):
say, I think I saw pornography. Will you help me?
And we will help you. We will not be mad at you.
We want to help you deal with what you saw because we love you
and we want to keep you safe. This is your screen safety plan.
That conversation is like 2 minutes long.
You're not giving them a ton of information.
(32:37):
You're giving them the least amount of information to stay
the most safe. And you're giving them a
definition so they know what it is they can identify it.
You're giving them a plan of what to do with actionable steps
where they move away from the thing that is dangerous.
And then you're telling them talk to me because that opens
(32:58):
the doors of communication. It strips away fear and shame
and says I am here to protect you.
I want to keep you safe from thepoisonous berries from the hot
stove. I want to keep you safe from
porn because that's my job. I want keep you safe.
That does not feel scary. That doesn't see, I knew you
were the woman for this job, Greta, because that doesn't feel
scared. That feels so doable.
(33:19):
I just wrote down the actionable.
So you're calling your screen safety plan and I just wrote
down stop, walk and talk like that.
If I could just those those things aren't scary, right?
Because we teach them that with anything right?
If there's a car in the middle of the road, you going too fast,
you stop, right? You walk the other way and then
you come tell mom, right? These are things we're already
teaching our kids. We're just carrying it over into
(33:41):
something that is is a life or death, death situation.
So I and we have to end for thisweek and we're going to be back.
But what a great, I mean, what agreat thing to land on is just,
is this isn't scary. And, and Greta's showing us how
this is just like what we talk to our kids about everything
else. We're just bringing it into this
realm and it's not scary. And our desire, our Mama bear
(34:03):
desire is to protect our kids, right?
And, and the reality is, is evenif it is scary, we do it scared,
right, because we love our kids that much.
So that can't be an excuse because someday we're not going
to want to grow up and and have a kid who's a addicted to porn
and go, well, I was too scared to talk to them about it, right.
That would be way worse than doing the scary thing.
So Greta, before we sign off forthe week, will you tell people
(34:26):
where they can find you and where they can just be
encouraged by you on a regular basis?
Yeah. You can find my book at anywhere
books are sold. Amazon, you know, Barnes and
Noble, wherever it's out there. Please, please get it.
Please read it and help your family.
And then if you want to hang outwith me online, I'm on
(34:50):
Instagram. That's the only social media I
have time for. And so look me up.
You can just Google my name, Greta Eskridge, and I'll come up
on Instagram. My website will come up.
I'm all over the place and I would love to hang out with you.
Oh, and I have a podcast, the Greta Eskridge podcast.
I always forget about it. There's too much to keep track
(35:11):
of. I'm out there.
And she speaks live at conventions.
So if that's true, can meet thiswoman and hug her and see that
smile in real life, you are going to be so blessed.
And the book that she talked about, we are going to share the
book and talk about the book specifically at the end of next
weeks episode. So Greta, just tell us what is
the book called and where can wefind it?
(35:31):
It's Time to talk to your kids about porn is the title of the
book. You can't forget that.
And it's, yeah, it's everywhere books are sold, so and.
Strangely, it is the cutest cover.
My little girl came in my room and it was on my night stand and
she goes, that's the funnest looking book ever.
And I thought right now that is an open door.
It was an open door for me to say, Hey, do you want to know
what this book is about? This book is a book to help
(35:53):
mommy better protect you, right?So it's a super fun I, I, I
shouldn't say it's a fun book. It's a fun cover of a very
important book. So fine, Greta, as you know, you
guys can find me periodically here at the Schoolhouse Rock
podcast along with a bunch of other amazing hosts that you'll
have week to week. And you can also find me on any
(36:14):
social media at Called to the Top Abby Rinella.
So we will see you right back here.
Same time, same place next week with Greta, where we'll dive
into the same topic again. See you soon.
You're listening to the biblical.
Family Network. Hey, I'm Miki and I'm Will and
we're the Co host of the CultureProof podcast.
(36:36):
We want to invite you to join usevery week as we discuss what's
happening in the world and then filter those happenings through
a decidedly biblical lens. There are many questions,
especially when we see what's happening in our culture today,
but the answers are found withinthe Word of God, so that's where
we want to look. Amen.
When we resist those cultural trends that rival the truth.
(36:57):
We remain culture proof. It's not just a conversation for
the men because pornography is not simply a male issue.
It impacts men, it impacts women, it impacts children.
It is a human issue. So therefore all of us need to
address it. Porn is a twisting of God's good
design and therefore we want to reject it because it's not His
(37:19):
best for us. It's actually what Satan is
using to try to trick us and give us a counterfeit.
And those conversations span thewhole life of your child.
Obviously you're not having those conversations with your 5
year old, but you're laying the groundwork so that when your
kids, 15 or 25, you can have those conversations and prepare
(37:39):
them for God's good gift.
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