Secondhand Therapy

Louie’s therapist tells him his “direct communication” is actually defensiveness — and it sends him into an identity spiral. We talk about fear, softness, control, relationship triggers, autism traits, wanting to be chosen, and why saying “I’m scared and sad” feels like death.

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-BetterHelp:

If you’re struggling, consider therapy with our sponsor. Visit https://betterhelp.com/secondhandtherapy for a discount on your first mont...

Michael talks about shutting down over Thanksgiving, emotional numbness, and the messy reality of grief. Louie breaks down triggers, embarrassment, childhood patterns, and why certain moments feel like personal attacks.

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-BetterHelp:

If you’re struggling, consider therapy with our sponsor. Visit https://betterhelp.com/secondhandtherapy for a discount on your first month of therapy.

If you have questions about the brand relati...

Louie shares a dream about his late partner that cracks open a huge conversation about grief, avoidance, triggers, and what it means to actually move forward. Michael challenges him, things get tense, and it turns into one of our most honest episodes yet.

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-BetterHelp:

If you’re struggling, consider therapy with our sponsor. Visit https://betterhelp.com/secondhandtherapy for a discount on your first month of therapy.

If you h...

Jeremy Lipkowitz breaks down porn addiction, how it affects your relationships, and why it’s more common than people think. He also talks about his time as a Buddhist monk and what that life taught him about discipline, desire, and mindfulness.

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-BetterHelp:

If you’re struggling, consider therapy with our sponsor. Visit https://betterhelp.com/secondhandtherapy for a discount on your first month of therapy.

If you have question...

Louie gets a wild text from his dad and things spiral into talk about cynicism, giving (and taking) compliments, and why we chase what we’re “missing out on.”

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-BetterHelp:

If you’re struggling, consider therapy with our sponsor. Visit https://betterhelp.com/secondhandtherapy for a discount on your first month of therapy.

If you have questions about the brand relating to how the therapists are credentialed, their privacy polic...

Louie and Michael answer a listener email about why men struggle with vulnerability—diving into shame, repression, and the fear of emotional connection.

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-BetterHelp:

If you’re struggling, consider therapy with our sponsor. Visit https://betterhelp.com/secondhandtherapy for a discount on your first month of therapy.

If you have questions about the brand relating to how the therapists are credentialed, their privacy policy, or ...

Louie and Michael unpack fawning—the hidden trauma response behind people-pleasing, codependency, and emotional safety—in their most vulnerable talk yet.

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-BetterHelp:

If you’re struggling, consider therapy with our sponsor. Visit https://betterhelp.com/secondhandtherapy for a discount on your first month of therapy.

If you have questions about the brand relating to how the therapists are credentialed, their privacy policy, or...

Gina Martin joins to talk misogyny, feminism, and emotional healing—how patriarchy, trauma, and compassion shape identity, relationships, and recovery.

BetterHelp:

If you’re struggling, consider therapy with our sponsor. Visit https://betterhelp.com/secondhandtherapy for a discount on your first month of therapy.

If you have questions about the brand relating to how the therapists are credentialed, their privacy policy, or therapis...

Lou and Michael unpack wabi sabi, the beauty of imperfection—talking therapy, accountability, control, and what it means to be seen before you’re “fixed.”

BetterHelp:

If you’re struggling, consider therapy with our sponsor. Visit https://betterhelp.com/secondhandtherapy for a discount on your first month of therapy.

If you have questions about the brand relating to how the therapists are credentialed, their privacy policy, or thera...

Michael and Lou unpack how childhood trauma fuels anxiety, codependency, and fear of abandonment. A raw mix of therapy insights, humor, and hard truths on boundaries, recovery, and self-worth.

BetterHelp:

If you’re struggling, consider therapy with our sponsor. Visit https://betterhelp.com/secondhandtherapy for a discount on your first month of therapy.

If you have questions about the brand relating to how the therapists are creden...

Codependency, boundaries, consent, and low self-esteem. Louie and Michael explore addiction, abandonment, and what it means to feel worthy of repair in relationships.

BetterHelp:

If you’re struggling, consider therapy with our sponsor. Visit https://betterhelp.com/secondhandtherapy for a discount on your first month of therapy.

If you have questions about the brand relating to how the therapists are credentialed, their privacy poli...

BetterHelp:

If you’re struggling, consider therapy with our sponsor. Visit https://betterhelp.com/secondhandtherapy for a discount on your first month of therapy.

If you have questions about the brand relating to how the therapists are credentialed, their privacy policy, or therapist compensation, here is an overview written by the YouTube creators behind the channel Cinema Therapy that goes into these topics: https://www.reddit.co...

Michael faces breakup blues while Louie shares dating advice from therapy. They dive into grief, guilt, family dynamics, and how relational thinking shapes love and connection.

BetterHelp:

If you’re struggling, consider therapy with our sponsor. Visit https://betterhelp.com/secondhandtherapy for a discount on your first month of therapy.

If you have questions about the brand relating to how the therapists are credentialed, thei...

Abortion advocate Sophie Nir joins us to unpack stigma, misinformation, and advocacy — from “abortion positivity” to global rights, men’s roles, and why abortion must be seen as a social good.

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BetterHelp:

If you’re struggling, consider therapy with our sponsor. Visit https://betterhelp.com/secondhandtherapy for a discount on your first month of therapy.

If you have qu...

Michael admits failure embarrasses him. Louie confesses to a codependent moment. Together they explore imperfection, relationships, and what growth really looks like.

BetterHelp:

If you’re struggling, consider therapy with our sponsor. Visit https://betterhelp.com/secondhandtherapy for a discount on your first month of therapy.

If you have questions about the brand relating to how the therapists are credentialed, their privacy po...

Louie reflects on radical acceptance, family wounds, and whether he truly desires a connection with his father.

This week, Louie and Michael unpack the idea of fatherhood — from the hypothetical qualities they wish they’d had in a dad, to what it means to grow up without a father figure. Louie challenges Michael’s story of not having one, and shares his perspective on who carries the responsibility for repairing parent–child relat...

Louie has a bone to pick with the audience over last week’s episode — and his therapist has thoughts.

This week, Louie unpacks why being “hard to argue with” might be hurting his relationships, and what it really means to meet people where they are without losing yourself. Michael shares a fresh example of Louie’s dismissive side and opens up about the possibility of having Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria (RSD).

Louie reflects on a ...

Michael and Louie get real about boundaries, control, and what it takes to accept people — especially family — as they are.

This week, Louie opens up about deciding to accept his mom for who she is, letting go of the hope for a deeper emotional connection, and navigating the grief that comes with a more shallow relationship. Michael shares how childhood neglect, acts of service, and the loss of key family support have shaped the wa...

Louie’s new therapist introduced him to Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT) — and it’s already getting personal.

In what early listeners have called our "most beautiful episode yet"... Louie brings EFT-style attachment questions to the pod, exploring what he and Michael learned from their families about vulnerability, emotional safety, and connection. They reflect on how their mothers shaped their ability (or inability) to express fe...