December 18, 2024 • 56 mins
It's now or never as the group has managed to get themselves into a military jeep and are driving through the hallways of the Sunrise mall towards the pharmacy and security office where their escape is said to be hidden, but will they manage to escape the zombie-infested mall with their Christmas presents? Or will an unforeseen danger stop them dead in their tracks!? Find out on the final episode of Black Friday of the Dead.
If you're enjoying our zombie one-shot series, check out our other one-shots such as our annual Monster of the Week one-shots: "Hunter's Haven," or our "Escape from Dino Island" one-shot. Or, be sure to check out our long-term series such as our Avatar Legends series "Benders & Brews" or our Dungeons & Dragons series "Criminals of Isla Numus." And, of course, be sure to like/follow/subscribe to Session Zero Heroes on whatever podcast streaming site you listen through, on our website at sessionzeroheroes.com, and on social media. Links to our profiles and channels are below!
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
>> Skylar (00:18):
Last time on Black Friday of, the dead.
I want to grab one of those hunting compound bows.
I'm gonna need like a hand guun. Okay, so me and
Fatty are looking through the guns. I want an ar
though. Automatic rifle. Are those there? There
would be some there. I've seen them. Batty
is going to gravitate towards the shotgun.
Okay. I come back. Yeah, I'm rolling back in because I'm on a
(00:41):
longboard now. N n I see. And also
I got slung on my back. I
got golf, bag nice
and sticking out of it for like three
shotgun. Oh my gosh.
How do we get out of here? We gotta go to we sell
drugs pretty much across the mall.
Oh, there'a specific place we needed to go to get
(01:03):
roof access. Yes. the security
office has a ladder in there. The security office is actually pretty
darn close to we sell drugs. Right. I think we
should probably book it to we sell drugs. Oh, and
yeah, and don't forget that you guys also have to get your presents
too, before you guys head up to the roof. Okay, so you
guys are coming to the end of the service
hallway. But as you do, you hear
(01:25):
something. The sound of squeaking
rubber wheels, something rolling towards you.
And around the corner, you see
your janitor friend. I don't think he's
human anymore. I shoot him with the bow. You,
fire an arrow
slamming directly into the chest of
(01:46):
Joffrey the janitor.
Dang it. Used fun. Kept going.
Tools you requested. How about we just put
him on the cart and just wheel him along with us? As
you guys start to turn, you find the food court
just loadd fons.
You see the National Guard recruitment
(02:08):
office. The military vehicle, it's more of
a jeep. You do find a, set of keys
on it. As you grab these keys, you hear
a. And from out of
a back room behind it, two more of these National Guard
zombies comes walking out.
(02:30):
So they closest to me. Yeah, well, yeah. You went
in there to get the keys. Yeah,
I jump away. M going to
talk to canister zombies.
Zs. I'm gonn toss the canister of tannerite
between them. Oh, and then
shoot at it after I jump
away. Yeskay. I jump
(02:52):
away. No, I said like I jumped
backwards when I saw them. This
is tannerite we're talking about here, man. This is an
explosive. Cool. Do it.
You know what? yeah, shoot. He said he did it. Yeah. Go to
shoot the tannerite. See if you hit.
Oh, he's not gonna miss. I have bad
feel about this. I love this idea. All right. I hope we'll
(03:15):
die up in Blaze the glory in these four episodes.
Or O. That's probably good enough. 11. I
mean, get above a nine, do a, D
six times eight.
That is a 40, 40 damage.
And that applies to all creatures that were
within kind of that immediate range. You
(03:35):
shoot your gun and
this massive explosion goes off, causing a
huge mist of smoke to kind of
fill that entire area of the room. Cameron
narrowly rolls out of said smoke,
coughing, but alive
and otherwise. You can't quite see whether
or not you've fully killed the zombies that
(03:57):
were back there. Did I live? Yeah, you're
alive. I just realized something. What?
We're in a National Guard recruitment
office, right? Yes. They got an
Xbox. I was gonna say they
have Xbox. Is it like a. Is it like a sign up thing?
No, it's like a way they lure people the Xbox,
(04:17):
it's like a way that would like, lure kids in to
get them to sign up. Like, hey, you come chill and hang out.
Play. Yeah. Oh, yeah.
Not like you. They're not goingna give it to you. They're just gonna let you
come play. Yeah, come in. Play some games with us.
Interestingiting tech. One time I was in a
recruiting office before I signed on with the Air
Force. it was with the Navy guys and they, they were playing Call of
(04:40):
Duty and one of them looked over at me. It was like, I've done
that before. I was
like, no, you haven't. Well,
whatever the case, you've caused a lot of noise. there's
this. Is it because he started the Xbox and.
Nah. Startup sound. Guys, it's the Battlefield 1
edition that just came
out. No, you made a lot of noise. There's a huge
(05:03):
bunch of smoke in the back. You're not sure if those zombies are alive. Cameron's
crawling his way away from said smoke.
And then there's the jeep in the center of the room.
What's everybody doing? Did I get the keys? You have the keys? Okay,
I'm going to the jeep. You crawl your way into the Jeep.
Can I stand up? I'm not a baby. Yeah,
I roll the stand up. No, you don't have to roll the stand
(05:23):
up. I stand up. Okay. I'm not a baby. You
stand up. I learned otherwise. You cl. Clim into the Jeep. You are a little
disoriented. I am very dizzy. I rolled to unlockd the car.
Ooh, 11. You don't even have. It's not about
unlocking. It's a jeep. I mean, you climbing through the top. The car is
irrelevant. They have it unlocked. You can get in, you can climb it and
it out. Okay, it's about starting the car. I roll, get the keys in the
(05:45):
ignition. You have the keys in the ignition.
You try a couple of them, and sure enough, one of them
starts. But Dave
doesn't have the Xbox yet. I'm just clarifying. I roll the
RO thing. I can completely agree that it's there. He hasn't gotten it
yet. Do I see the, zombies? Do we all see the, zombies? after a couple of
moments, sure enough, the zombies
crawl out of the smoke. The
(06:07):
entire lower torsos have been
absolutely blown off. So it's just
their upper crawler. Yes, they're crawlers. We can
keep these. We gotta keep them
so we can. We could do some mystery boxes and
stuff. What? This is a call
bl. Oh, call it zombies
referenceand obviously that was definitely out in
(06:30):
Twitt 2016. I know what crawlers
are, so I actually would audibly say
crawlers. I believe you. I'm
going for the Xbox. I grabbed the controller,
unpauing it, and they were playing Call of Duty zombies.
So the music starts playing. Yes,
the mystery box music. So you're all aware of the
crawlers that are moving towards you guys at the moment? I'd say
(06:53):
one of them probably starts like trying to crawl up the side
of the jeep. oh, guys, I gotta get the
Xbox. I charge forward. Dave is
charging forward to get the Xbox. I start blasting these
crawlers, turn my way. one is immediately on
the floor, the other one's a little distracted as it's crawling up the
Jeep. Go
66. Holy crap. Okay, yeah, that's
(07:15):
gonna succeed. Don't even roll damage for that. He's already half a
zombie. You just run over and you
jump. And as you do, you fire down like it's some kind of
like rocket jump or something, but it's just with a,
with a shotgun. And you shoot down and its
head just explodes. Like it just goes right
into it. You land on the other side with like a tuck and
(07:35):
roll. You reseathe your
shotgun back into the golf bag and then you run
forward and start packing up this Xbox
One. I'm frantically pulling the cables out and packing it
up. What are you guys doing? Buckling my
seatbelt. Yeah, I'm just chilling. You guys
are all in the Jeep. What about the, janitor? What did you guys do
with. Strapped him to the roof. Well,
(07:58):
there's still a Zombie crawling back. There's
still a zombie crawling up the side of the but it with
my gun. yeah. Roll the. Roll the thing.
Just do a string. Cuz you're not doing an attack this
but it with my gun. Nine Not. That's just
enough. Just barely. You. You knock him back. He falls
backwards on his back and his armors too heavy. So he's like
(08:18):
a turtle that just fell over on his back. He's just kind of squirming
there. Yeah. And he's trying to like roll over, but he's just
not getting the right amount of traction. Can I shoot him now? Roll to shoot
the zombie. Yeah. Okay. 14. 14. Okay,
I'm gonna say that you kill him, but just make sure you mark the bullet gone. Yeah.
How many bullets? I'm gona one. Okay.
I just. It was a quick shot. Yeah. Ye. Yeah. So you
(08:39):
shoot down at this guy. Guys, come on. I think you just shoot
him like just in the chest or something like he does. He was
barely a zombie. I know only you hop in. I know only one
shot down. It kills a crawler. Sure. I'll take a
word for it. All right, so you shoot the crawler. He's dead. Pretty
common knowledge. But of course all this noise in such you
made. I'm attracting more zombies out the front. So you're
all climbing into this jeep. This military
(09:02):
jeep. Nice. You strap the
janitor guy like freaking, Jurassic
Park. Jeff Gold. Jeff Goldblum in the back of
the jeep on Jurassic Park. And as you
guys pull out of this national guard facility, where
are you headed? First of all, are you headed towards the
sell the drugs Stanky tan candle?
(09:22):
Stinky candle? well, it's straight north of you. It's straight
northle. We don't need
candles. There's candles and the pots and pans store right next to
each other. And you guys need both of those things
Stret you got here late. You don't understand.
These guys need to get. Why are t they saying this to
me? I am. He is. Dave was saying we
gott go there. Okay. So you peel out and you
(09:45):
slam into some zombies. As you do just setting
a flying back into the crowds of them in the food
twirk. No. and you guys peel
forward dodging sort of those center
displays. to a moderate extent. I mean you. You kind
of clip them a little bit, but it's not a big deal.
Yeah'm going stinky
candles. But upset. He might
(10:07):
be slightly concussed. Which I am. My
anger on these zombies
we're right next to a. Ah,
stinky candle. Okay. I'm just driving straight
into the zombies right in front of stinky candle
Caps. Just
cap. Cap. No cap. No
cap. Just call cap. No, no
(10:29):
cap. You get in there. There's no ha.
No, it's all caps. no, all cap.
I ah, like that. So might with my condition
with someone mine. Well, he's grabbing his candle. Would someone go grab
a hat for me? No, I'm on operation
apple Slicer. One working arm. I've got.
I'm grab. No, I'm gonna go. I'm
(10:50):
gonna. You just have you re like screw it. And you just hop out
of this. You got.
Okay, Quinn, you run it into caps. I'm
leaving the bag. Okay, cool. Quicker. I'm gonna stand on the
back of this jeep and basically be guarding it.
Yeah. Because I know zombies are going to be coming. And as.
As you take your stands up on top of this jeep, Joffrey
(11:10):
looks up to you and he says, you're going to help a lot
of people.
Joffrey, hold. One more time.
Joffrey, grab that shotgun and
out of Dave's. Bang. Yeah, and then when I run out of
weapon bullets in my ar. You're gonna hand me the next shotgun,
okay? No, I don't get to shoot it. I don't think you came
from your angle. Oh, watch me.
(11:33):
And he points the shotgun and there's like a zombie coming up.
He's like d. This. It
misses. Okay, top, you're.
I'm gonna shoot at this zombie. You almost hit
Quinge. Jorey. Come on. I thought you were gonna say you're
gonna. Gonna shoot. Joffrey
shot with. Where's that
(11:55):
guy? Just hand me
the guns. I. I was just. Good. I just
start shooting at. Yeahah. You're doing
16. Yeah, that hits. Okay, you're keeping this. I'm gonna use
that as like a general roll, and then we'll have you roll how much ammo you
expend in a moment. But otherwise you're just keeping zombies back.
I successfully grab my hat. Quinn, you
rush into all caps. there's a. There's a dude
(12:18):
behind the counter, and he's wearing like an extra long jersey, and
he's got a backwards, jankies
cap. Yeah, you
like the New York jan. No, no, the New
Jersey jankies.
And obviously he's a zombie. You see,
the world series hats are behind him. Yeah, I'd
(12:38):
like to shoot. Okay. you. I mean, he's Kind of behind the
counter. So it gives you kind of a free opening. So go
for it. Roll the attack to shoot him.
Nine. Nine. Okay. Yeah, that's just enough. Roll the
damage know was what? D6? No,
D6 times four. Yes. That sounds great.
12. You shoot him. it
(13:00):
slams into, his chest. he kind of leans back
a little bit, and then he kind of, like lurches forward, and he kind of like
falls over the counter. And so he's
on your side of the counter. He's laying there on the ground. He's still
alive. Have more bullet. It's up to you. How do you hand the
situation? I'd like to shoot some again. Okay, you're gonna shoot
him again. I'm gonna give you a plus two on this
one. Since he's on the ground. He's right in front of you. another 12. Another 12. Okay. Yep.
(13:23):
All right. Roll the. I'm not gonna make you roll D. You walk up to him,
just blast him. He's dead.
And then you turn around and you see the hat.
It's up on a high shelf. I just grabbe the pole
things in. Oh, yeah, they do have the pole thing. And then I grab a
second one. Just. Yeah, why not? Why not? Just in case.
All right, sounds good. You have successfully accomplish getting
(13:43):
your cubs hat. Your world
series cubs hat. And right next door,
fatty has procured a mahogany
teakwood three wick candle. Over
at the stinky candle. Over at the stanky
candle. Done. Ah. All right. there was.
There was no one in the stanky candle. What?
That's hard to believe. It's actually not. And I can't tell
(14:06):
you, and I cannot tell you why.
I mean, unless. Unless you want to try to, like, gain some kind
of intuition. But I don't know how. Guess. Poor naming.
M. Mmm. That could be it. That could very well be it.
Somebody. Somebody lit all the candles
at same time. No oxygen.
O. But see, that would create a new challenge. Then I'd be like, algh,
(14:26):
Fatty, how did you even get in the store? It's like
you walk up to it and you. Gosh. Wearing my
standard oxygen mak.
All right, so the kids. So
big episode as far as, like, collection goes. M.
Fatty has his stinky candle. Dave has both
his frisbee, golf disc and his
(14:47):
Xbox one. Quinn was able to snag
his cubs hat. I guess, technically, Cameron already
had his jerseyorts jersey.
and you guys are sitting and he's speaking
of Cameron. He's holding off the incoming zombies
as he sits there in the,
jeep right across the way, you do see
the bapple storore. Just throwing that one out there. Now,
(15:09):
would the b. Apple store
have apple slicers or just apple
slicer? Just bapple slicers. Which
is what they call.
Charging port. Charging port, yeah.
Okay, then I'll go in pots and pans. Well, I was gonna say
pots and pans is like, right next to you. You rush
into pots and pans, and there are, two
(15:32):
kind of crotchety old lady zombies in there.
You big caiss. All right, pinch your
cheeks. How close are, they,
there's one kind of in the back. She's probably not even a problem, but
there's one kind of a little bit closer to you. Hands off the
merchandise. I.
She turns around, she goes like a cat.
(15:52):
And he just blasts. ACO blast
1313. You turn your shotgun to
her, she goes flying backwards. You're
not sure she's 100% dead yet, but, man,
did she fly. She had no traction on
her u. tennis ball walker. Yes, her tennis ball
walker. And she was coming at you with it
too, but she goes flying back to the other one
(16:15):
Somewhere in the back of the story there. and you grab your
apple slicer and you go running
out with it. All right, Dave, you've
officially gotten every item on your list,
man. Now I need, like, a duffle bag. Yeah,
right. It's not really, like, bags involved in
cooking. It's a really big pot I could
grab. Yeah, there's stock pots. Okay, you
(16:37):
want a stock bo grab, Xbox
sized pot, the
largest, like, stock bough you can find. I need
something to put these in.
Unless. So I come back, I
put the apple slicer in there. So it's like, clunking as I'm
running. Hopefully this
is for yourself, because I feel like you're going toa give it to somebody and they'll
(17:00):
be like, yeah, I got the red ring of death, like, day one. No
apple slice in't put the xbox. O. Okay,
looking through this little
intersection here, does there appear to be a lot of activity
going on at the b Apple store? yeah, there's like
three dudes all wearing bapple shirts in
there, and they're just kind of moseying around. They're obviously
(17:20):
zom. Oh, they're not part of the.
Sory, they're not customers. They're all looking at their
phones. You come walking
it. I'm gonna go
visit the idiot bar. The idiot bar. Not to be
Confused with the Genius bar. okay. But no, I'm gonna go see
if I can procure a, you paad.
(17:42):
All right, sounds good. You go running in there, you got, you got
these, these three zombies, two of
which or one of which immediately comes quickly over to the front of
the store to greet you.
And he's got like a, he's got like a U pad strapped
to his arm and he.
(18:03):
I'm going to quickly turn tail and run away.
Okay, okay.
He kind of follows after you a little bit. Like, he's like,
I'm gonna, run through the intersection back to the Jeep
screaming, cover me. Can I shoot him?
Yes, you can shoot for the head.
Eleven. Okay, that hits. I'm going to try to keep it a
(18:25):
little bit general because at this point you guys have guns and these are just regular
kind of your everyday average zombies. So as long as you hit, you're not wasting
ammo. you fire it and it shoots
his. So his arm is where he
obviously got bit previously by another zombie. So it is
basically hanging there by a small amount of
flesh. You fire this gun and it basically
(18:45):
removes the rest of his arm. It causes him to sort of spin in
place off balance and fall down. His
remainder of his arm that has been
separated has the UAD on it.
I thought I have a uppad so now I can have a bonus
uad. You didn't grab and go. I was saying you ran up to the
store immediately. Oh, I didn't even get. Okay, yeah, I'm gonna grab
(19:06):
the upad and arm at the same time
and then tell me how you're holding it as you grab it.
Like, what's your go to here? I'm gonna go with like the,
Frodo Sam grip where I'm kind of holding
the, the forearms, wrist and
his arm or his hand is holding my wrist
attached to the upad. Oh, gosh. That's weird.
(19:26):
That's weird, but it's hilarious. Okay, grab. You grab
it and you run off with your,
your u paad plus
forearm and you have a, You have accomplished
that. I'mnna. I'm starting to hit the side of the
car. The Jeep. Come on, guys, got
go. Come on, get back in. Is everybody
getting back in? I'll hop in, yeah. Okay. As
(19:49):
you're all running back in, fatty, you think
to yourself as you're kind of looking towards the
area trying to scan for zombies, you look over to the
pots and pans store and you think
the samurai ice cream maker and
you see a Huge display of them in
the window. But zombies are starting to make
(20:09):
their way from every hallway down towards
you. What do you do? You
Addy. Come on. Get it. It's his last present on
his list. What are you standing that door.
He is. He's just standing there and he's like looking back
and we'all in the
(20:32):
it will go for the
ninja samurai. For the samurai
samurai. Creamy rol
roll ed Dex like some kind of
like run. Yeah. I don't know if you have a sky. I feel like you
had something on there that might relate to that
mowing. Do I see what he's heading
towards? Yeah, I think you all you're all
(20:54):
looking right at him. You guys are all in the jeep. Can
I shoot the window? Ah O I've
got to help him.
A12A AH12 okay. M you run for a
Dave. I'm just go goingna say you just just consume the ammo. It's a
big window. I mean you're not probably gonna miss. Hold
on. Maybe I should make you roll it just to see if you don't hit
(21:14):
faty himself. 11:11 okay,
so 11 definitely fatty. You're like running towards the
pots and pans store and then all of a sudden
the window just shatters in front of you.
Oh, that's so cinematic. Fall back. Where it's just
terrified. As this glass goes FL thankfully it goes flying
inwards. but whatever the case youn scramble back
(21:36):
to my feet. Yeah, you scramble back to your grab. the samurai
fromab the bottom of the display case. So as I
grab it, it just everything topples
overab1
these are big dude. These are like this.
Yeah. Grab an
extra. You ah, can pick one of on the ground,
sir. Whatever the case yes. You grab
(21:58):
it and it's a good thing that you do because the zombies from that
hallway are coming towards you. And as you
pull this this ice cream they are all buried under.
Ext Ninja samurais. Yes.
A horde of samurais destroy
the zombie. That sounds so cool. All right, sounds good.
So, Quinn, you have a PS4 Slim you
(22:19):
still need. And Jackson, you've got a necktie
and a lightsabber that you still have to get. But neither of
those were really necessarily in this area. So we'll have to
see what opportunities arise. I got one.
I need them all. Yes. That's why
I made you guys have three items.
Other two items. you
PS4 slim was the only other
(22:42):
item. Technically you didn't. Yeah, you only had two because
you wouldn't come up with the third one. Am I back in the driver's seat?
Yeah. Game goes right down.
Down the hall. Why are we still going to these
places? Let's go. What time is it? I look at my
phone, see what time it is. 10:30. We still got an hour and a
half. Like, Connor needs his meds. I really need
(23:02):
my meds, bro. I'm feeling n but good. Goes right here. And then we
can just go right down to the drugs. One more stop
him I don't know about. Listen,
after all this'two un name stops. Hang on. We can make this
stff. We can make this work. After all is said and done,
you. I still have to drive down to Missouri, so,
like, I don't even know why I'm up. What do you
(23:22):
need? You need a tie in what? I need a necktie for my
father and for myself. I'm looking for a replica
lightsaber. All right, here, right next to
gamego, we could have ties and more.
That's a store. Ties and more. It's a Tai store. You
never heard of it? Kai. Kai ties. Yeah. Underneath it
says it's a Tai store.
(23:45):
Not to be confused with I
never heard of him. Where you live under a roide, it says
slogan. And then, right across
from it. Could be for a lightsaber. Could be.
It's, just. It a. It's a Toys R Wii. You
know, Toys
are you. Toys are you. Dude. All right. Toys are
(24:06):
you to. It's toys. Literally. Me r in
a U. Yeah, that's how I bro, it's
called. It's toys for me.
It's just like, toys for me marketed towards adults
just buying them. Ye. It's literally
just like, three stores downe.
It's true.
(24:30):
you guys go around the corner, you guys
start slamming into some zombies. Time is a corner. It'not
even really. Yeah, it's like a straight line. It's basically just a
straight line. Yep. Okay, we're here. Yeah.
Wow. What moral ch we just did. I would say.
I would say that, there's a couple of zombies that get past
the. The collapsed ice cream makers thing.
(24:50):
And so as you're starting the wheels, there's a moment where they
kind of are, like, running against the flooring. And
you just see. You just see Joffrey in the back,
and they're getting closer. He's like, they're getting
closer. They're getting closer.
And then finally the wheels screech and then you guys
lurch forward. he rolls a little Bit. And then he
(25:10):
catches himself with one of his good arms. And then he pull. He
holds on'just. Say
is six good arms. For some
people, they turn into zombies for other people'they get weird
mutations like Fallout. What's going on?
No, Sorry. But anyway, job for you. Good
back then. And the eight armed
(25:33):
octopus creatures.
Joffrey's in the back, and he just looks back up at you
guys, and he says, the items you guys are getting from those
stores, they're gonna help a lot of
people. Just go get your
stuff, you two. As I
stand back up, the fire at the zombies that
(25:53):
are following our car. Al right, so you guys are parked. You
guys run inside. game go is
has a hefty number of zombies in there.
I say a hefty number as far as, like, can fit in
the game go. Like, let's say there's six zombies in. I will
toss Quinn a canister of tannerite. Oh, I said
I grabbed four. Yep. All right.
(26:15):
Chuck it in there. You chuck it in there. Roll to shoot.
it. You just. It'd be so
funny if you miss and you're just sitting there like. No, hold on. Let me try
again. No, no, I got it. I got it this
time. so it looks bad.
Dexterity. seven. plus nine. Nine,
exactly. All right. That's exactly what you needed. I
(26:35):
think it's the, like, D. Six times eight, I think, is what the
grenade was. So roll that times eight times
eight. Was it six?
40. Holy cow. Okay. You shoot
this. It's a crowded store. I
mean, that's not a big store. So this really
just maximizes the damage.
There's. I mean, the whole store just. The glass
(26:58):
shatters out of any side that there's glass on the wall
or whatever. The displays are all shattered in
there. and it is just filled with smoke. You have no
idea if there's something in there that might have survived or not.
You don't know. But the zombies are coming, and it's
gonna be too much for Cameron to be able to just shoot down.
They just sell that stuff.
(27:19):
Sp. They really do actually do. I've
seen CR. Go get it. Yeah, it's.
I thought you were gonna go get your ties. What are you still
doing? There's no
one in the te.
I'm. I. I'm gonna say nothing. Survive that.
I'm gonna try and go to the back through the back door real quick. That's
right. Okay. Through the fireames. You
(27:41):
run around to the back door. And it's
locked. Course It. I'm not trying to be a.
But, but this is a very like high value storye.
Wouldn't the thing just have blown the door open?
Okay, sure. O. Thank you. I'm like, come on. That's the only
reason'too much pressure and it caused the door to bust.
Right. So I go back there. There's got toa be a PS4 slim just chilling in the
(28:03):
back ca. Because that's where they always have. Sure, yeah. Grab one. I'm out.
You're out the back. I jump in the car. There's no shrapnel
on the PlayStation through the door there.
Wall in the back. Not through wall. you
jump into the jeep and by the time that you've done this. And then
Jackson. What? Tell me he's doing this at the same time.
Tell me the goofy tie that you managed to find. So it,
(28:23):
it, I went Garfield. It says I hate
Monday.
I found a tie. And it is, it
is green. It'just it's like a
solid, green tie.
Yep. And on the underside it says, get out of my
swamp. Nice, Nice. It's a
(28:44):
Shrek tie. I like it. Awesome. are you
running over to toys? Are you. yes.
Okay. Ah, you run into toys. Are you not
an. A toy
store for adults? I feel like that. Wait a
minute. Does it not. Does that not fix it?
Isn't thatult? I don't know. I
feel like I could erase this and leave it just the
(29:05):
xxx. If you want, you could
say, you could call it a movie replica store
because that's the exact same thing. It's action figures,
it's movie memorabilia, it's all toys,
but you just call it Replica Storye.
Well, I like the idea that it's a movie
replica store. I can't really rename it because we've said Toys R you
like six times now, so. But that's basically what
(29:28):
it is. Okay, so you see, inside it's a bunch of these
dudes with movie T shirts, mostly
horror. And they all have like
those button down shirts that they have over, over top
of, them, but they're not buttoned down. So it's just like T shirt underneath
with a graphic tee and then a button down shirt
over top of it. Then the whole store just, it just
reeks of like body odor. Yep, it
(29:51):
does. There's not even zombies in here. What?
In fact, they'not zombies.
Right. But as you walk in and
you rush towards the display with the lightsabers, you
hear, hey, excuse me.
Are you guys alive? No. Leave me
(30:12):
alone. Wait, wait,
wait. Don't leave me.
Can you. Can you help me get out of here? You guys have
a. Whoa. Is that a jeep? I
feel like he would know the model of the jeep, but Skyller
doesn't know the model of jeep. I. He probably does
not. He probably is, like. Right. That really
(30:33):
reminds me of that one scene in. In, Star
Wars Episode 3 when they're on that
desert planet. Or. O man, it's.
It's like that scene in, Tropic Thunder
just. Hey,
I love Justin Long. Well, the
desert planet,
(30:54):
you have the box with the. With the lightsaber in
it. Ah, but what are you gonna do about this guy?
Look, can I just please just, I don't know where you
guys are going. Could you take me with you? All right,
yeah, come with us. We got a guy in the back of the jeep that needs some moral
support. Oh, man. All right, let's.
Let's do it. And. And this dude hops out. I mean, he looks
(31:14):
exactly like the guys I described. I like to think
that he also has, a stormtrooper helmet.
And he puts it on even better.
Nice. Let's get it. I'm
gonna get in. Into jeep. So while,
Jackson's doing this, I like to think that
I'm shooting a gun, clearing the way alongside
(31:35):
Fatty and Dave, and we're just kind of all on top of the jeep.
Just blast away. And while we're shooting, I'm just like, hey, guys,
have you. Have we thought, like,
we're getting picked up by the military? Do you think they're
gonna let us bring all of this stuff with
us? Well, aren't they gonna be cramped of
room? Well, you guys are currently the only
(31:55):
survivors that the room could. Who
said. I mean, I'm sorry, you
guys. We're the only ones getting at it. What about the
people that were in cover to cover? Who's the say people
aren't just on the roof already? Well, maybe we find out
when we get there. As far as I'm aware,
the items you guys are picking up are gonna
(32:16):
help a lot of people.
They've got plot armor items. The
items. Oh, that's interesting. Items, have plot
armor. Yes. Interesting. That's an interesting way to think
of surviving the zombie apocalypse. Paty,
is. Does Jackson have another person with him?
Hey, guys. My name is
(32:36):
Kevin. it's great to meet you. I'm a
very, I bring a lot to the table. I've
Seen a lot. Pretty much every zombie movie in
existence. basically all the way from
Night of the Living Dead all the way
to, all the way to Train to Basan. And
I watched Train to Basan in the original
(32:56):
Korean too. He starts to get into the
back with Joffrey and he's like, man, they had this
really crazy scene where they're like actively
fighting zombies in the train and it's
like a crowded room. And the one guy, the one really
strong guy, he's just like holding them all off like. Jackson,
are you here? O
(33:17):
Guys. Everyone get in? Yeah, everybody's in.
Okay, cool. There are a lot of people in this jeep.
Yeah, it's getting pretty crowded. Five plus Connor,
plus Jeffrey plus what was
Kevin? Kevin. I like to think that Kevin is
sitting in Joffrey's lap because
we're running out of. He's sitting there like Santa
(33:37):
Claus. Like Santa Claus style. Just across the
lap, hand behind the neck, just talking to him.
I would love to get the Blu Ray
set. The Lord of the Rings, the Lord editions.
Oh my gosh. Have you seen it with the
director's commentary? Remember that part where,
where. Listen, Kevin, I love Lord of the Rings, but we don't have
(33:57):
time to geek over it now. And that means something. That's a
fair Jackson. A death stare right now.
Well, whatever the case, is there a seatbe?
Who's the guy that kicks the helmet? And is that
Aragorn? Oh yeah, Yeahorn. Did you know he
actually
(34:19):
now do you shoot him?
He kicks it just like this and he kicks the Stormt Troper
helmet and he's like, oh no, my stormtrooper helmet. He
says that. and then you see like the, you know, the classic
camera cut to like it's really far away from the
Jeep. You see him get like kicked out the back.
Bul. No,
(34:40):
no. He does say that though. He's like, hey guys, there's not really
a seat. And then you guys start. You
squeal around the corner there to head down
towards, we sell drugs. and the
exit. Yes, and ideally the
exit to. As we get to we sell drugs. I'm going to
like turn the Jeep and like
(35:01):
park it so it's sideways and blocking the path
so that we can go to Weasel Drugs and then make it to the exit.
Oh, okay. So you're basically right next to Dino dozers
in that little area or. Yeahah. Cutting off that
corner. Okay. Because that also attaches to
the food courte area. Yeah. So, I'm Blocking all that
off. So you're kind of blocking off that kind of corner
there. Awesome. Awesome. So
(35:24):
as you guys run, into. We sell drugs.
I would say that pharmacy probably
isn't super busy on Black Friday.
you sure hope it wouldn't be, you know, like, we don't want a
lot of injuries. So you guys are able to go in there, you find
Connor's insulin, he shoots up. He
doesn't want insulin. No. If we said he's low,
(35:45):
he needs food, which is what we. We don't need
food. Some glucagon. Yeah, Give him some
glucag. Some glucagon. He gets a glue and
insulin for when he comes.
A glue gun. Connor's favorite.
Connor, for the record, loves eating
glue. You run into the baby
(36:08):
store and you buy some goo goo go. Is that what you
goa. Glucaga, glucaga,
glucagon, Glucag go.
This is ridiculous. Who makes these
names? This is like I'm naturally
occurring hormone. All right, so
you grab some glucagon. I feel
ridiculous saying it. Run back to the Star wars
(36:30):
store and buy the book about the race
glucagons. Wow.
Okay. I bet Kevin would have a lot to say about this
gluc. How do you take glucagon? It
is an injection. Rectally Injection. Okay.
Thankfully, rectally. Yes.
It absorbs it quicker. They
bypass. You
(36:53):
see Connor, like, tape off his arm and,
I don't know, go stomach
o. It's like an epien. Yes. Okay.
He jams his glucag go into his
thigh. He says, right
on, Roz. I feel so much better now.
Did anyone grab me a gun? Why do you?
(37:17):
I'm still stuck on the fact that you think people who take
insulin act like junkies tying off
their arms'seen? Him do that
at game night. I don't think where I saw him,
I'never seen his ar.
You'even take there. Yeah, that's what
we're saying. He's what'saying? He ties off the arm. Was
he tapping for veins too? He must have been.
(37:39):
Hey, we need to talk to Conly. I don't
know what he was up to, I swear. I
have amazingly vivid mental
image of Connor tying off his arm
and, like, doing some kind of an injection. Maybe he was
making a joke. I don't proably. I don't
know. I don't know. Okay. Whatever he's got,
(37:59):
he's got a kit of insulin and he
took his dang glucagon.
Let's Go. And you guys run out of. We
sell drug. No, I'm gonna get some
antibiotics. Oh, you get some
antibiotics. Okay. What is it?
Tie your arm and andect that, fatty. Do
(38:21):
it, fatty. What do I need? Well, what are you looking for? Gram
positive or gram negative? Oe. He's behind the
counter,
throws it out. Out. Ye. just grab some
augment. Yes, some aug rotten.
This is where we lose, like, 95% of our audience.
(38:42):
Whatever covers. I wish I went to pharmacy
school. Auggment. Yeah,
give me some that. Ah, down the
hatch. All right, all right. You're taking. How many pills does
you take a take? Come on. All right, Tie
off my arm.
Tie your arm and then you take. You just
(39:02):
down or. What are you doing?
G. That s. That's all
I'm taking all my drugs from now
I'm gonna be at work being like, I'm about to pops of ibup propfen go
had they seem me sor of wrapping my heart.
Hony, did you get me that tight tape so I could take
my daily
vitamin'officeah?
(39:24):
T
say when Selen is to
say. Everybody runs inside it just to starts taking
medications. They're just grabbing bottles off the
shelf. I grabbed some Zola.
Some. Do they have any?
Everybody's taking claret and clear for some reason. I
don't know. Have you got any cough syrup with
(39:46):
codating? Fentanyl?
Quinn's high in the corner. Chugging
cough. I grabbed some gosh for the
pain. Some real gauze or
Joffrey. And as you rush over to him
with this gauze and start putting it on him, he says
he looks you in the eyes.
(40:10):
He looks you in the eyes and he says, this is
gonna help up people.
And as you start. Cause, oh, shoot. Is
he still on the Jeep? Oo
Joffrey. Yeah, Nobod helped him, I guess. Okay,
well, now that you got him wrapped up, do you like. What are
you doing? Because you guys are leaving the jeep here, right? Yeah.
(40:32):
Okay. I, put him on the long board.
Hey, is he still laying down
now? He's doing the super. And I grab one of his good
arms. You're just leading him.
I just drag him like a piece of luggage.
Just more moaning than, the luggage
(40:54):
as Kevin get off.
but it's so much easier with someone else just
pulling me. As you, get Joffrey off and you start to
lead him away, as you guys are starting to make yourself towards
the, security office, all of a sudden the
(41:14):
jeep lurches over
as if, like, lifted from One end and shoved
out from the other side. And coming out of
the prote Team supplement store
is a massive T
ripped zombies T.
And he says,
(41:36):
up the ladder, up the ladder, up the ladder.
you guys aren't even at the security office yet.
I mean, I guess that's a question. Are you guys running for the security
office or you gonna book?
And as you're booking it for the security office,
Kevin's hustling behind you guys. Push him
over. he dav. Pull around and shoot him in
(41:56):
kn. I mean, you can if you want to be a butthole, but let me
finish my description. Dave's pulling,
Joffrey. And Joffrey's like, I don't know what
thought going on back there, but it sounds like
something that's gonna hurt a lot of people.
It's his one line. I got to give it to him. Whenever you
can, you got do the right thing and let go.
(42:18):
I mean, it's not moving super fast, but it is.
It is focused on you guys and it is
moving in your direction. It's following. Security office
open. Yes. You guys start running down
the hallway, and you find the security office and you
burst inside. And
you're a little bit surprised to see. I mean, you're not surprised at
(42:38):
what it looks like in there, but you're a little bit surprised
at a certain aspect of what you see inside.
to the left, they have sort of like a holding
cells for shoplifters, things along those
lines. Right. People that they need to hold until the police can get there and do
the whole thing. Whatever the case. There is an individual that is
inside of the, holding cell, and he
(42:59):
says, excuse me, Excuse
me. it is quite fortuit this that you
have shown up here. Could, you perchance
let, me out? I've heard some
noises from outside. I, heard the announcement
from the police. I'm a bit cancert.
Is there a ladder? U.
(43:19):
yes. Oh, cool. Hey, so who's
going first? I pointed the ladder. Are we all inside
the office now? Yeah, yeah.
Do the crime, do the time.
I have not done any crime. It was, accident.
accidentally locked my. Well, I mean, I intentionally locked
myself in here because there was a freaky security
(43:40):
guard. His face was all rotted. He had the blood
riding all over him. And, he was going to
get. Trying to grab me. It was very
scary. So I closed the door.
they're right there and they're on like a little,
key holder. Sure. Him out quick.
Came'going up. He seems cooler than Kevin. It's
(44:00):
a mall. It's a mall holding cell. It's not
like he's a mass murder.
A ball holding
only this one. That's a good point. I was gonna say this is
like him. Okay. If the keys are on a key
ring right next to it. This is really like mar
Mayberry with, like. Yeah,
(44:21):
it's just O is the town drunk. It's like, hey,
you know, maybe like, a drunk guy comes in or some
drug. Some drug dude is, like, going nuts in the mall, and
they grab him and they take s back in cell, just tapping
away, just t off.
Oh, thank you, so much. I really appreciate it.
what are you all doing? We're leaving. Oh,
(44:44):
yeah, before that hulk comes through here.
O, you gotta go last, though. You gotta keep
lookout. That's fine with me. Okay, I'll go
first. You're the injured one. All right, I'll start up first.
How long does it take? I can use my hand, like,
my left hand to hold on so I can climb. Yeah. But I can't, like,
reach up, so it's just take me a little bit longer. But I don't see any reason why I couldn't
(45:04):
get. Okay, so, all right, I'm up.
I'm on the roof then. Yeah, I mean, you. Yeah, you. I mean, you
got time to climb up there. Okay, who's next?
I'll go next. Okay. Jackson, makes his way up the
ladder. I mean, it's pretty easy for you. it's not even something
we'th rolling for. Just to clarify, like, I mean, you're just going up a ladder. That's what it's
for, Kein. Oh, man, thank you
(45:25):
so much. Hey, you know, after we get done already.
And he goes up the ladder. Have you guys you seen Paullart
Mokov 2? It
was terrible. Speaking of diabetics, you're next.
Connor. Oh, thanks, Br. And he starts making his way
up. This whole time, he's kind of, like, been busting out his camera and filming
and stuff every once in a while. But anyway, he makes his way up. After he
(45:45):
leaves. Can I say it? Connor's now glueag gone.
Okay. You
hate it so much.
Firmly gripping my well stocked stock
pot, I ascend
ladder. Okay, sounds good, Dave.
Dave makes it out with a one arm around a
stockp pot and the other arm climbing up the ladder. But sure
(46:08):
enough, you got your presence and you are out of them all, fatty.
And, fatty. I
look down at the ground where
Joffrey is laying. Oh, no. We've got
Joffrey. Kevin, you help Joffrey.
I'm already up here. I don't know how I'm supposed to
help him. I can pull him up once he gets to how to get him up up
(46:28):
there. Is there any rope in here?
So, like, how mobile is Joffrey? Or he's basically
a. I mean, he can move on his own.
O. That's a big baby, but it's gonna be
slow. Yeah. Okay, get up there, Joffrey.
Go. Okay, that's really slow. We
should have made him go last. It hurts.
Okay, Joffrey, hold on. hold on. you're going last. He's
(46:51):
already two rungs up. Okay,
Two rungs.
Yeah, I guessap and just
set him down the.
I'm not dying to that hulking monster.
Good, Joffre. I was gonna help a
(47:12):
you people. I'm out of here, and I'm
just climbing. I literally grabbed him off
the ladder, placed himide, started climbing
up. all right, so I good, dude, you know,
but even made up, I can't in good
consciousy. He'll follow us.
He'll follow us. Barricade the door. If
he can't make it up in time, at least we don't die for him. Just
(47:34):
come on. Okay. He can climb. He's helping
a lot of people going last. That's true.
Help all of us. Yep. I will go
up and keep a shotgun pointed down behind
youre. All right. Sounds good. The meagers his way
up. All right, here's what I'mnna say. You,
climb up, and you may get to the top. You point your gun down.
(47:55):
As Joffrey is starting his ascent, all of a
sudden, the doors fly open and the massive
hulking zombie starts to walk in.
Jorey is just out of reach. But the
zombie grabs onto one of the ladder rungs and
reaches up. You have one chance to fire a shot and
hit this thing in order to keep
it back. Not Joffrey, I'm saying. So
(48:17):
roll those dice. O.
And you do have your bonus for the hunting. Yeah.
Oh, dear. Okay. No, I think that'll be fine. Because with the
dexterity and the bonus, we're saying at like,
an 11 and 11. All right, you shoot
down. I'm not going toa have your roll damage because I think basically you're
(48:38):
just trying to keep it off of Joffrey long enough for
him to make it up another couple of rungs, Kevin.
And I'm assuming you probably, since you're right, There, both reach down,
grab an arm, and help pull Joffrey up
the rest of the way. And then slam the trap
door, or whatever you want to call that, the roof door behind
you. That area is locked off. Zombies don't climb things
(48:58):
very well. The hulking zombie is
trapped inside. Guys,
I'm starting counting. Yeah. With my
finger. we've got that French dude.
No, I thought he went. Oh, no. He did. Cool.
Yeah, he'll figure it out. We look down, he'back walk.
(49:19):
And then the hoing zombie just walks up, grabs them, and
just lower. I mean, you guys
can't see. You don't know what's going on in there. You don't know. whatever the
case. Bl.
whatever the case, I would say tr.
American. you
guys rush, over to the other end of the
rooftop of the mall. There's nothing up here. I mean, it's just
(49:41):
rooftop. Also, there are no other people up here. Not currently.
But you do rush over to the other end of the mall, and you get
to the section that's above cover to cover, and
there is a section that you can open up. There's a glass,
like, overhang or whatever you want to call break out a window.
Yeah, you break out a window. That's on the rooftop window.
they have built up a bunch of bookshelves
(50:01):
to kind of create sort of bookcase staircase. they
climb up that and then between that and maybe some rope that they've
procured, you're able to pull them up so that you can get the
rest of the survivors. Oh, man, you guys never
did find that little girl, though. It was. She was.
She was in the kids. Like, there's like a. Like the
kids play peen. No, no, no, no. There's like a tree, like
(50:21):
a weird, like, tree decoration they put in the kids place to
be like, oh, yeah, growth and learning and stuff like that. Right. She
was in the little tree area. Like, literally made four
kids to be inside of. So her mom managed to Clair I
think is what her name was, managed to find her in this
time. And so she gets out as well.
I forgot about that as much as Jackson probably forgot about it. So it's not big
(50:43):
deal. whatever the case, you pull her out,
everybody, just hangs out pretty much until
midnight when a couple of helicopters come down. You
guys had seen out in the not too far off
distance, kind of surrounding the parking lot. The military forces and
whatnot. them
too, may or may not have
gotten bit o y. We'good yeah. They're
(51:04):
fine. They had agarotten potatoes.
That's secretly the cure.
whatever the case, three helicopters land,
but everybody's able to fit in two of them. one
of the military guys, from the third helicopter, he kind of looks
over at you guys. He says, was that of Almost or any others?
We don't have time to wait. No, that's it. Let's go. There's
(51:25):
a French man. He's French. Leave
him. We don't have time to wait. So I guess it doesn't
hour. But if there's only one survivor, that's not bad.
They all take off. the first helicopter
with, the other group of survivors in it tanks off and
starts heading away. Then you guys start to take off. In
roughly about the same time, the third helicopter that's empty starts to
(51:47):
take off. And as this happens, you
see the little hatch from the security room open up.
And the Frenchman kind of drags himself out
from inside of it and he.
Yeah, like Terminator. And you see him rush over
and there's a duffel bag that's sitting over right
next to that exit way that he opens up and
(52:07):
withdraws a rocket launcher.
And he turns and he points it towards the
empty helicopter and fires. And you
can see the rocket go flying, spinning ever so
slightly. Slams into
the empty helicopter. Well, I say empty, it has the soldiers in it.
But whatever the case, it hits the helicopter, which starts
(52:28):
to spin crazy out of control,
slamming down into the parking lot where a
whole bunch of the, various, you know, soldiers
and police and such were. It causes a small explosion
there. Right? he kind of waves at you
guys and he picks up a little like, something in his hand and he
just pushes like there's a button. And you see a
(52:48):
bunch of small explosions shatter the glasses at
each one of the entrances of the mall. And
zombies start to flood outwards
towards the disoriented police
forces, that are outside. And as
you guys fly away, the last thing that you guys can see down
below you is a whole bunch of undead
chaos as it starts to flood out of
(53:11):
the mall and into the city.
He was the zombie master the whole
time. May have been that
piece of garbage. Never trust a Frenchman. I said
it. And he's like, oh, he's in the M.O.L. s good.
He did leave him with a zombie.
Unbelievable. Oh, maybe they
kiss. Ah. they were in love. It was a
(53:33):
romance. warm
bodies. That's right. All right, thank you all for
listening to our all flesh must be eaten. One
shot kind of left things open ended. Maybe. Maybe
more happens later on. Who knows. We'll see you next
time on Session Zero Heroes
thank you all for joining us for another episode of our All
Flesh Must Be Eaten One Shot Black Friday of the
(53:56):
Day, which represents our celebration of the holiday season.
We hope youre enjoying a little zombie fighting action amidst your
Christmas fun. If you are, we encourage you to check out some of our
other series such as our Avatar Legends long term campaign
Benders and Brws which is set in the world of av, the Last
Airbender or our Dungeons of Dragons long term
series Criminals of Isla Numis. If youre looking for
(54:16):
more spooky actual PL content from us, I
encourage you to go check out our Hunters Haven series which
now has two different stories, Music Mayhem, which
was written and run by Cameron who you heard in this series
and Trick or Treat, Fight or Flee which was written
by Nate Vagart who you can hear play in our Escape from Dino
Island One Shot. Whatever you listen to next, be sure
(54:37):
to follow or subscribe to the Session Zero Heroes podcast on
your preferred podcast streaming platform. You can find us
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YouTube. Following the show ensures that you dont miss out on
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(54:57):
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(55:17):
will air through the month of November 2024 and into
December 2024, so be sure to swing back to get
the rest of the exciting conclusion to this special
holiday zombie series. Well see you guys next time.
Last time on Black Friday of, the dead.
I want to grab one of those hunting compound bows.
I'm gonna need like a hand guun. Okay, so me and
Fatty are looking through the guns. I want an ar
though. Automatic rifle. Are those there? There
would be some there. I've seen them. Batty
is going to gravitate towards the shotgun.
Okay. I come back. Yeah, I'm rolling back in because I'm on a
(00:41):
longboard now. N n I see. And also
I got slung on my back. I
got golf, bag nice
and sticking out of it for like three
shotgun. Oh my gosh.
How do we get out of here? We gotta go to we sell
drugs pretty much across the mall.
Oh, there'a specific place we needed to go to get
(01:03):
roof access. Yes. the security
office has a ladder in there. The security office is actually pretty
darn close to we sell drugs. Right. I think we
should probably book it to we sell drugs. Oh, and
yeah, and don't forget that you guys also have to get your presents
too, before you guys head up to the roof. Okay, so you
guys are coming to the end of the service
hallway. But as you do, you hear
(01:25):
something. The sound of squeaking
rubber wheels, something rolling towards you.
And around the corner, you see
your janitor friend. I don't think he's
human anymore. I shoot him with the bow. You,
fire an arrow
slamming directly into the chest of
(01:46):
Joffrey the janitor.
Dang it. Used fun. Kept going.
Tools you requested. How about we just put
him on the cart and just wheel him along with us? As
you guys start to turn, you find the food court
just loadd fons.
You see the National Guard recruitment
(02:08):
office. The military vehicle, it's more of
a jeep. You do find a, set of keys
on it. As you grab these keys, you hear
a. And from out of
a back room behind it, two more of these National Guard
zombies comes walking out.
(02:30):
So they closest to me. Yeah, well, yeah. You went
in there to get the keys. Yeah,
I jump away. M going to
talk to canister zombies.
Zs. I'm gonn toss the canister of tannerite
between them. Oh, and then
shoot at it after I jump
away. Yeskay. I jump
(02:52):
away. No, I said like I jumped
backwards when I saw them. This
is tannerite we're talking about here, man. This is an
explosive. Cool. Do it.
You know what? yeah, shoot. He said he did it. Yeah. Go to
shoot the tannerite. See if you hit.
Oh, he's not gonna miss. I have bad
feel about this. I love this idea. All right. I hope we'll
(03:15):
die up in Blaze the glory in these four episodes.
Or O. That's probably good enough. 11. I
mean, get above a nine, do a, D
six times eight.
That is a 40, 40 damage.
And that applies to all creatures that were
within kind of that immediate range. You
(03:35):
shoot your gun and
this massive explosion goes off, causing a
huge mist of smoke to kind of
fill that entire area of the room. Cameron
narrowly rolls out of said smoke,
coughing, but alive
and otherwise. You can't quite see whether
or not you've fully killed the zombies that
(03:57):
were back there. Did I live? Yeah, you're
alive. I just realized something. What?
We're in a National Guard recruitment
office, right? Yes. They got an
Xbox. I was gonna say they
have Xbox. Is it like a. Is it like a sign up thing?
No, it's like a way they lure people the Xbox,
(04:17):
it's like a way that would like, lure kids in to
get them to sign up. Like, hey, you come chill and hang out.
Play. Yeah. Oh, yeah.
Not like you. They're not goingna give it to you. They're just gonna let you
come play. Yeah, come in. Play some games with us.
Interestingiting tech. One time I was in a
recruiting office before I signed on with the Air
Force. it was with the Navy guys and they, they were playing Call of
(04:40):
Duty and one of them looked over at me. It was like, I've done
that before. I was
like, no, you haven't. Well,
whatever the case, you've caused a lot of noise. there's
this. Is it because he started the Xbox and.
Nah. Startup sound. Guys, it's the Battlefield 1
edition that just came
out. No, you made a lot of noise. There's a huge
(05:03):
bunch of smoke in the back. You're not sure if those zombies are alive. Cameron's
crawling his way away from said smoke.
And then there's the jeep in the center of the room.
What's everybody doing? Did I get the keys? You have the keys? Okay,
I'm going to the jeep. You crawl your way into the Jeep.
Can I stand up? I'm not a baby. Yeah,
I roll the stand up. No, you don't have to roll the stand
(05:23):
up. I stand up. Okay. I'm not a baby. You
stand up. I learned otherwise. You cl. Clim into the Jeep. You are a little
disoriented. I am very dizzy. I rolled to unlockd the car.
Ooh, 11. You don't even have. It's not about
unlocking. It's a jeep. I mean, you climbing through the top. The car is
irrelevant. They have it unlocked. You can get in, you can climb it and
it out. Okay, it's about starting the car. I roll, get the keys in the
(05:45):
ignition. You have the keys in the ignition.
You try a couple of them, and sure enough, one of them
starts. But Dave
doesn't have the Xbox yet. I'm just clarifying. I roll the
RO thing. I can completely agree that it's there. He hasn't gotten it
yet. Do I see the, zombies? Do we all see the, zombies? after a couple of
moments, sure enough, the zombies
crawl out of the smoke. The
(06:07):
entire lower torsos have been
absolutely blown off. So it's just
their upper crawler. Yes, they're crawlers. We can
keep these. We gotta keep them
so we can. We could do some mystery boxes and
stuff. What? This is a call
bl. Oh, call it zombies
referenceand obviously that was definitely out in
(06:30):
Twitt 2016. I know what crawlers
are, so I actually would audibly say
crawlers. I believe you. I'm
going for the Xbox. I grabbed the controller,
unpauing it, and they were playing Call of Duty zombies.
So the music starts playing. Yes,
the mystery box music. So you're all aware of the
crawlers that are moving towards you guys at the moment? I'd say
(06:53):
one of them probably starts like trying to crawl up the side
of the jeep. oh, guys, I gotta get the
Xbox. I charge forward. Dave is
charging forward to get the Xbox. I start blasting these
crawlers, turn my way. one is immediately on
the floor, the other one's a little distracted as it's crawling up the
Jeep. Go
66. Holy crap. Okay, yeah, that's
(07:15):
gonna succeed. Don't even roll damage for that. He's already half a
zombie. You just run over and you
jump. And as you do, you fire down like it's some kind of
like rocket jump or something, but it's just with a,
with a shotgun. And you shoot down and its
head just explodes. Like it just goes right
into it. You land on the other side with like a tuck and
(07:35):
roll. You reseathe your
shotgun back into the golf bag and then you run
forward and start packing up this Xbox
One. I'm frantically pulling the cables out and packing it
up. What are you guys doing? Buckling my
seatbelt. Yeah, I'm just chilling. You guys
are all in the Jeep. What about the, janitor? What did you guys do
with. Strapped him to the roof. Well,
(07:58):
there's still a Zombie crawling back. There's
still a zombie crawling up the side of the but it with
my gun. yeah. Roll the. Roll the thing.
Just do a string. Cuz you're not doing an attack this
but it with my gun. Nine Not. That's just
enough. Just barely. You. You knock him back. He falls
backwards on his back and his armors too heavy. So he's like
(08:18):
a turtle that just fell over on his back. He's just kind of squirming
there. Yeah. And he's trying to like roll over, but he's just
not getting the right amount of traction. Can I shoot him now? Roll to shoot
the zombie. Yeah. Okay. 14. 14. Okay,
I'm gonna say that you kill him, but just make sure you mark the bullet gone. Yeah.
How many bullets? I'm gona one. Okay.
I just. It was a quick shot. Yeah. Ye. Yeah. So you
(08:39):
shoot down at this guy. Guys, come on. I think you just shoot
him like just in the chest or something like he does. He was
barely a zombie. I know only you hop in. I know only one
shot down. It kills a crawler. Sure. I'll take a
word for it. All right, so you shoot the crawler. He's dead. Pretty
common knowledge. But of course all this noise in such you
made. I'm attracting more zombies out the front. So you're
all climbing into this jeep. This military
(09:02):
jeep. Nice. You strap the
janitor guy like freaking, Jurassic
Park. Jeff Gold. Jeff Goldblum in the back of
the jeep on Jurassic Park. And as you
guys pull out of this national guard facility, where
are you headed? First of all, are you headed towards the
sell the drugs Stanky tan candle?
(09:22):
Stinky candle? well, it's straight north of you. It's straight
northle. We don't need
candles. There's candles and the pots and pans store right next to
each other. And you guys need both of those things
Stret you got here late. You don't understand.
These guys need to get. Why are t they saying this to
me? I am. He is. Dave was saying we
gott go there. Okay. So you peel out and you
(09:45):
slam into some zombies. As you do just setting
a flying back into the crowds of them in the food
twirk. No. and you guys peel
forward dodging sort of those center
displays. to a moderate extent. I mean you. You kind
of clip them a little bit, but it's not a big deal.
Yeah'm going stinky
candles. But upset. He might
(10:07):
be slightly concussed. Which I am. My
anger on these zombies
we're right next to a. Ah,
stinky candle. Okay. I'm just driving straight
into the zombies right in front of stinky candle
Caps. Just
cap. Cap. No cap. No
cap. Just call cap. No, no
(10:29):
cap. You get in there. There's no ha.
No, it's all caps. no, all cap.
I ah, like that. So might with my condition
with someone mine. Well, he's grabbing his candle. Would someone go grab
a hat for me? No, I'm on operation
apple Slicer. One working arm. I've got.
I'm grab. No, I'm gonna go. I'm
(10:50):
gonna. You just have you re like screw it. And you just hop out
of this. You got.
Okay, Quinn, you run it into caps. I'm
leaving the bag. Okay, cool. Quicker. I'm gonna stand on the
back of this jeep and basically be guarding it.
Yeah. Because I know zombies are going to be coming. And as.
As you take your stands up on top of this jeep, Joffrey
(11:10):
looks up to you and he says, you're going to help a lot
of people.
Joffrey, hold. One more time.
Joffrey, grab that shotgun and
out of Dave's. Bang. Yeah, and then when I run out of
weapon bullets in my ar. You're gonna hand me the next shotgun,
okay? No, I don't get to shoot it. I don't think you came
from your angle. Oh, watch me.
(11:33):
And he points the shotgun and there's like a zombie coming up.
He's like d. This. It
misses. Okay, top, you're.
I'm gonna shoot at this zombie. You almost hit
Quinge. Jorey. Come on. I thought you were gonna say you're
gonna. Gonna shoot. Joffrey
shot with. Where's that
(11:55):
guy? Just hand me
the guns. I. I was just. Good. I just
start shooting at. Yeahah. You're doing
16. Yeah, that hits. Okay, you're keeping this. I'm gonna use
that as like a general roll, and then we'll have you roll how much ammo you
expend in a moment. But otherwise you're just keeping zombies back.
I successfully grab my hat. Quinn, you
rush into all caps. there's a. There's a dude
(12:18):
behind the counter, and he's wearing like an extra long jersey, and
he's got a backwards, jankies
cap. Yeah, you
like the New York jan. No, no, the New
Jersey jankies.
And obviously he's a zombie. You see,
the world series hats are behind him. Yeah, I'd
(12:38):
like to shoot. Okay. you. I mean, he's Kind of behind the
counter. So it gives you kind of a free opening. So go
for it. Roll the attack to shoot him.
Nine. Nine. Okay. Yeah, that's just enough. Roll the
damage know was what? D6? No,
D6 times four. Yes. That sounds great.
12. You shoot him. it
(13:00):
slams into, his chest. he kind of leans back
a little bit, and then he kind of, like lurches forward, and he kind of like
falls over the counter. And so he's
on your side of the counter. He's laying there on the ground. He's still
alive. Have more bullet. It's up to you. How do you hand the
situation? I'd like to shoot some again. Okay, you're gonna shoot
him again. I'm gonna give you a plus two on this
one. Since he's on the ground. He's right in front of you. another 12. Another 12. Okay. Yep.
(13:23):
All right. Roll the. I'm not gonna make you roll D. You walk up to him,
just blast him. He's dead.
And then you turn around and you see the hat.
It's up on a high shelf. I just grabbe the pole
things in. Oh, yeah, they do have the pole thing. And then I grab a
second one. Just. Yeah, why not? Why not? Just in case.
All right, sounds good. You have successfully accomplish getting
(13:43):
your cubs hat. Your world
series cubs hat. And right next door,
fatty has procured a mahogany
teakwood three wick candle. Over
at the stinky candle. Over at the stanky
candle. Done. Ah. All right. there was.
There was no one in the stanky candle. What?
That's hard to believe. It's actually not. And I can't tell
(14:06):
you, and I cannot tell you why.
I mean, unless. Unless you want to try to, like, gain some kind
of intuition. But I don't know how. Guess. Poor naming.
M. Mmm. That could be it. That could very well be it.
Somebody. Somebody lit all the candles
at same time. No oxygen.
O. But see, that would create a new challenge. Then I'd be like, algh,
(14:26):
Fatty, how did you even get in the store? It's like
you walk up to it and you. Gosh. Wearing my
standard oxygen mak.
All right, so the kids. So
big episode as far as, like, collection goes. M.
Fatty has his stinky candle. Dave has both
his frisbee, golf disc and his
(14:47):
Xbox one. Quinn was able to snag
his cubs hat. I guess, technically, Cameron already
had his jerseyorts jersey.
and you guys are sitting and he's speaking
of Cameron. He's holding off the incoming zombies
as he sits there in the,
jeep right across the way, you do see
the bapple storore. Just throwing that one out there. Now,
(15:09):
would the b. Apple store
have apple slicers or just apple
slicer? Just bapple slicers. Which
is what they call.
Charging port. Charging port, yeah.
Okay, then I'll go in pots and pans. Well, I was gonna say
pots and pans is like, right next to you. You rush
into pots and pans, and there are, two
(15:32):
kind of crotchety old lady zombies in there.
You big caiss. All right, pinch your
cheeks. How close are, they,
there's one kind of in the back. She's probably not even a problem, but
there's one kind of a little bit closer to you. Hands off the
merchandise. I.
She turns around, she goes like a cat.
(15:52):
And he just blasts. ACO blast
1313. You turn your shotgun to
her, she goes flying backwards. You're
not sure she's 100% dead yet, but, man,
did she fly. She had no traction on
her u. tennis ball walker. Yes, her tennis ball
walker. And she was coming at you with it
too, but she goes flying back to the other one
(16:15):
Somewhere in the back of the story there. and you grab your
apple slicer and you go running
out with it. All right, Dave, you've
officially gotten every item on your list,
man. Now I need, like, a duffle bag. Yeah,
right. It's not really, like, bags involved in
cooking. It's a really big pot I could
grab. Yeah, there's stock pots. Okay, you
(16:37):
want a stock bo grab, Xbox
sized pot, the
largest, like, stock bough you can find. I need
something to put these in.
Unless. So I come back, I
put the apple slicer in there. So it's like, clunking as I'm
running. Hopefully this
is for yourself, because I feel like you're going toa give it to somebody and they'll
(17:00):
be like, yeah, I got the red ring of death, like, day one. No
apple slice in't put the xbox. O. Okay,
looking through this little
intersection here, does there appear to be a lot of activity
going on at the b Apple store? yeah, there's like
three dudes all wearing bapple shirts in
there, and they're just kind of moseying around. They're obviously
(17:20):
zom. Oh, they're not part of the.
Sory, they're not customers. They're all looking at their
phones. You come walking
it. I'm gonna go
visit the idiot bar. The idiot bar. Not to be
Confused with the Genius bar. okay. But no, I'm gonna go see
if I can procure a, you paad.
(17:42):
All right, sounds good. You go running in there, you got, you got
these, these three zombies, two of
which or one of which immediately comes quickly over to the front of
the store to greet you.
And he's got like a, he's got like a U pad strapped
to his arm and he.
(18:03):
I'm going to quickly turn tail and run away.
Okay, okay.
He kind of follows after you a little bit. Like, he's like,
I'm gonna, run through the intersection back to the Jeep
screaming, cover me. Can I shoot him?
Yes, you can shoot for the head.
Eleven. Okay, that hits. I'm going to try to keep it a
(18:25):
little bit general because at this point you guys have guns and these are just regular
kind of your everyday average zombies. So as long as you hit, you're not wasting
ammo. you fire it and it shoots
his. So his arm is where he
obviously got bit previously by another zombie. So it is
basically hanging there by a small amount of
flesh. You fire this gun and it basically
(18:45):
removes the rest of his arm. It causes him to sort of spin in
place off balance and fall down. His
remainder of his arm that has been
separated has the UAD on it.
I thought I have a uppad so now I can have a bonus
uad. You didn't grab and go. I was saying you ran up to the
store immediately. Oh, I didn't even get. Okay, yeah, I'm gonna grab
(19:06):
the upad and arm at the same time
and then tell me how you're holding it as you grab it.
Like, what's your go to here? I'm gonna go with like the,
Frodo Sam grip where I'm kind of holding
the, the forearms, wrist and
his arm or his hand is holding my wrist
attached to the upad. Oh, gosh. That's weird.
(19:26):
That's weird, but it's hilarious. Okay, grab. You grab
it and you run off with your,
your u paad plus
forearm and you have a, You have accomplished
that. I'mnna. I'm starting to hit the side of the
car. The Jeep. Come on, guys, got
go. Come on, get back in. Is everybody
getting back in? I'll hop in, yeah. Okay. As
(19:49):
you're all running back in, fatty, you think
to yourself as you're kind of looking towards the
area trying to scan for zombies, you look over to the
pots and pans store and you think
the samurai ice cream maker and
you see a Huge display of them in
the window. But zombies are starting to make
(20:09):
their way from every hallway down towards
you. What do you do? You
Addy. Come on. Get it. It's his last present on
his list. What are you standing that door.
He is. He's just standing there and he's like looking back
and we'all in the
(20:32):
it will go for the
ninja samurai. For the samurai
samurai. Creamy rol
roll ed Dex like some kind of
like run. Yeah. I don't know if you have a sky. I feel like you
had something on there that might relate to that
mowing. Do I see what he's heading
towards? Yeah, I think you all you're all
(20:54):
looking right at him. You guys are all in the jeep. Can
I shoot the window? Ah O I've
got to help him.
A12A AH12 okay. M you run for a
Dave. I'm just go goingna say you just just consume the ammo. It's a
big window. I mean you're not probably gonna miss. Hold
on. Maybe I should make you roll it just to see if you don't hit
(21:14):
faty himself. 11:11 okay,
so 11 definitely fatty. You're like running towards the
pots and pans store and then all of a sudden
the window just shatters in front of you.
Oh, that's so cinematic. Fall back. Where it's just
terrified. As this glass goes FL thankfully it goes flying
inwards. but whatever the case youn scramble back
(21:36):
to my feet. Yeah, you scramble back to your grab. the samurai
fromab the bottom of the display case. So as I
grab it, it just everything topples
overab1
these are big dude. These are like this.
Yeah. Grab an
extra. You ah, can pick one of on the ground,
sir. Whatever the case yes. You grab
(21:58):
it and it's a good thing that you do because the zombies from that
hallway are coming towards you. And as you
pull this this ice cream they are all buried under.
Ext Ninja samurais. Yes.
A horde of samurais destroy
the zombie. That sounds so cool. All right, sounds good.
So, Quinn, you have a PS4 Slim you
(22:19):
still need. And Jackson, you've got a necktie
and a lightsabber that you still have to get. But neither of
those were really necessarily in this area. So we'll have to
see what opportunities arise. I got one.
I need them all. Yes. That's why
I made you guys have three items.
Other two items. you
PS4 slim was the only other
(22:42):
item. Technically you didn't. Yeah, you only had two because
you wouldn't come up with the third one. Am I back in the driver's seat?
Yeah. Game goes right down.
Down the hall. Why are we still going to these
places? Let's go. What time is it? I look at my
phone, see what time it is. 10:30. We still got an hour and a
half. Like, Connor needs his meds. I really need
(23:02):
my meds, bro. I'm feeling n but good. Goes right here. And then we
can just go right down to the drugs. One more stop
him I don't know about. Listen,
after all this'two un name stops. Hang on. We can make this
stff. We can make this work. After all is said and done,
you. I still have to drive down to Missouri, so,
like, I don't even know why I'm up. What do you
(23:22):
need? You need a tie in what? I need a necktie for my
father and for myself. I'm looking for a replica
lightsaber. All right, here, right next to
gamego, we could have ties and more.
That's a store. Ties and more. It's a Tai store. You
never heard of it? Kai. Kai ties. Yeah. Underneath it
says it's a Tai store.
(23:45):
Not to be confused with I
never heard of him. Where you live under a roide, it says
slogan. And then, right across
from it. Could be for a lightsaber. Could be.
It's, just. It a. It's a Toys R Wii. You
know, Toys
are you. Toys are you. Dude. All right. Toys are
(24:06):
you to. It's toys. Literally. Me r in
a U. Yeah, that's how I bro, it's
called. It's toys for me.
It's just like, toys for me marketed towards adults
just buying them. Ye. It's literally
just like, three stores downe.
It's true.
(24:30):
you guys go around the corner, you guys
start slamming into some zombies. Time is a corner. It'not
even really. Yeah, it's like a straight line. It's basically just a
straight line. Yep. Okay, we're here. Yeah.
Wow. What moral ch we just did. I would say.
I would say that, there's a couple of zombies that get past
the. The collapsed ice cream makers thing.
(24:50):
And so as you're starting the wheels, there's a moment where they
kind of are, like, running against the flooring. And
you just see. You just see Joffrey in the back,
and they're getting closer. He's like, they're getting
closer. They're getting closer.
And then finally the wheels screech and then you guys
lurch forward. he rolls a little Bit. And then he
(25:10):
catches himself with one of his good arms. And then he pull. He
holds on'just. Say
is six good arms. For some
people, they turn into zombies for other people'they get weird
mutations like Fallout. What's going on?
No, Sorry. But anyway, job for you. Good
back then. And the eight armed
(25:33):
octopus creatures.
Joffrey's in the back, and he just looks back up at you
guys, and he says, the items you guys are getting from those
stores, they're gonna help a lot of
people. Just go get your
stuff, you two. As I
stand back up, the fire at the zombies that
(25:53):
are following our car. Al right, so you guys are parked. You
guys run inside. game go is
has a hefty number of zombies in there.
I say a hefty number as far as, like, can fit in
the game go. Like, let's say there's six zombies in. I will
toss Quinn a canister of tannerite. Oh, I said
I grabbed four. Yep. All right.
(26:15):
Chuck it in there. You chuck it in there. Roll to shoot.
it. You just. It'd be so
funny if you miss and you're just sitting there like. No, hold on. Let me try
again. No, no, I got it. I got it this
time. so it looks bad.
Dexterity. seven. plus nine. Nine,
exactly. All right. That's exactly what you needed. I
(26:35):
think it's the, like, D. Six times eight, I think, is what the
grenade was. So roll that times eight times
eight. Was it six?
40. Holy cow. Okay. You shoot
this. It's a crowded store. I
mean, that's not a big store. So this really
just maximizes the damage.
There's. I mean, the whole store just. The glass
(26:58):
shatters out of any side that there's glass on the wall
or whatever. The displays are all shattered in
there. and it is just filled with smoke. You have no
idea if there's something in there that might have survived or not.
You don't know. But the zombies are coming, and it's
gonna be too much for Cameron to be able to just shoot down.
They just sell that stuff.
(27:19):
Sp. They really do actually do. I've
seen CR. Go get it. Yeah, it's.
I thought you were gonna go get your ties. What are you still
doing? There's no
one in the te.
I'm. I. I'm gonna say nothing. Survive that.
I'm gonna try and go to the back through the back door real quick. That's
right. Okay. Through the fireames. You
(27:41):
run around to the back door. And it's
locked. Course It. I'm not trying to be a.
But, but this is a very like high value storye.
Wouldn't the thing just have blown the door open?
Okay, sure. O. Thank you. I'm like, come on. That's the only
reason'too much pressure and it caused the door to bust.
Right. So I go back there. There's got toa be a PS4 slim just chilling in the
(28:03):
back ca. Because that's where they always have. Sure, yeah. Grab one. I'm out.
You're out the back. I jump in the car. There's no shrapnel
on the PlayStation through the door there.
Wall in the back. Not through wall. you
jump into the jeep and by the time that you've done this. And then
Jackson. What? Tell me he's doing this at the same time.
Tell me the goofy tie that you managed to find. So it,
(28:23):
it, I went Garfield. It says I hate
Monday.
I found a tie. And it is, it
is green. It'just it's like a
solid, green tie.
Yep. And on the underside it says, get out of my
swamp. Nice, Nice. It's a
(28:44):
Shrek tie. I like it. Awesome. are you
running over to toys? Are you. yes.
Okay. Ah, you run into toys. Are you not
an. A toy
store for adults? I feel like that. Wait a
minute. Does it not. Does that not fix it?
Isn't thatult? I don't know. I
feel like I could erase this and leave it just the
(29:05):
xxx. If you want, you could
say, you could call it a movie replica store
because that's the exact same thing. It's action figures,
it's movie memorabilia, it's all toys,
but you just call it Replica Storye.
Well, I like the idea that it's a movie
replica store. I can't really rename it because we've said Toys R you
like six times now, so. But that's basically what
(29:28):
it is. Okay, so you see, inside it's a bunch of these
dudes with movie T shirts, mostly
horror. And they all have like
those button down shirts that they have over, over top
of, them, but they're not buttoned down. So it's just like T shirt underneath
with a graphic tee and then a button down shirt
over top of it. Then the whole store just, it just
reeks of like body odor. Yep, it
(29:51):
does. There's not even zombies in here. What?
In fact, they'not zombies.
Right. But as you walk in and
you rush towards the display with the lightsabers, you
hear, hey, excuse me.
Are you guys alive? No. Leave me
(30:12):
alone. Wait, wait,
wait. Don't leave me.
Can you. Can you help me get out of here? You guys have
a. Whoa. Is that a jeep? I
feel like he would know the model of the jeep, but Skyller
doesn't know the model of jeep. I. He probably does
not. He probably is, like. Right. That really
(30:33):
reminds me of that one scene in. In, Star
Wars Episode 3 when they're on that
desert planet. Or. O man, it's.
It's like that scene in, Tropic Thunder
just. Hey,
I love Justin Long. Well, the
desert planet,
(30:54):
you have the box with the. With the lightsaber in
it. Ah, but what are you gonna do about this guy?
Look, can I just please just, I don't know where you
guys are going. Could you take me with you? All right,
yeah, come with us. We got a guy in the back of the jeep that needs some moral
support. Oh, man. All right, let's.
Let's do it. And. And this dude hops out. I mean, he looks
(31:14):
exactly like the guys I described. I like to think
that he also has, a stormtrooper helmet.
And he puts it on even better.
Nice. Let's get it. I'm
gonna get in. Into jeep. So while,
Jackson's doing this, I like to think that
I'm shooting a gun, clearing the way alongside
(31:35):
Fatty and Dave, and we're just kind of all on top of the jeep.
Just blast away. And while we're shooting, I'm just like, hey, guys,
have you. Have we thought, like,
we're getting picked up by the military? Do you think they're
gonna let us bring all of this stuff with
us? Well, aren't they gonna be cramped of
room? Well, you guys are currently the only
(31:55):
survivors that the room could. Who
said. I mean, I'm sorry, you
guys. We're the only ones getting at it. What about the
people that were in cover to cover? Who's the say people
aren't just on the roof already? Well, maybe we find out
when we get there. As far as I'm aware,
the items you guys are picking up are gonna
(32:16):
help a lot of people.
They've got plot armor items. The
items. Oh, that's interesting. Items, have plot
armor. Yes. Interesting. That's an interesting way to think
of surviving the zombie apocalypse. Paty,
is. Does Jackson have another person with him?
Hey, guys. My name is
(32:36):
Kevin. it's great to meet you. I'm a
very, I bring a lot to the table. I've
Seen a lot. Pretty much every zombie movie in
existence. basically all the way from
Night of the Living Dead all the way
to, all the way to Train to Basan. And
I watched Train to Basan in the original
(32:56):
Korean too. He starts to get into the
back with Joffrey and he's like, man, they had this
really crazy scene where they're like actively
fighting zombies in the train and it's
like a crowded room. And the one guy, the one really
strong guy, he's just like holding them all off like. Jackson,
are you here? O
(33:17):
Guys. Everyone get in? Yeah, everybody's in.
Okay, cool. There are a lot of people in this jeep.
Yeah, it's getting pretty crowded. Five plus Connor,
plus Jeffrey plus what was
Kevin? Kevin. I like to think that Kevin is
sitting in Joffrey's lap because
we're running out of. He's sitting there like Santa
(33:37):
Claus. Like Santa Claus style. Just across the
lap, hand behind the neck, just talking to him.
I would love to get the Blu Ray
set. The Lord of the Rings, the Lord editions.
Oh my gosh. Have you seen it with the
director's commentary? Remember that part where,
where. Listen, Kevin, I love Lord of the Rings, but we don't have
(33:57):
time to geek over it now. And that means something. That's a
fair Jackson. A death stare right now.
Well, whatever the case, is there a seatbe?
Who's the guy that kicks the helmet? And is that
Aragorn? Oh yeah, Yeahorn. Did you know he
actually
(34:19):
now do you shoot him?
He kicks it just like this and he kicks the Stormt Troper
helmet and he's like, oh no, my stormtrooper helmet. He
says that. and then you see like the, you know, the classic
camera cut to like it's really far away from the
Jeep. You see him get like kicked out the back.
Bul. No,
(34:40):
no. He does say that though. He's like, hey guys, there's not really
a seat. And then you guys start. You
squeal around the corner there to head down
towards, we sell drugs. and the
exit. Yes, and ideally the
exit to. As we get to we sell drugs. I'm going to
like turn the Jeep and like
(35:01):
park it so it's sideways and blocking the path
so that we can go to Weasel Drugs and then make it to the exit.
Oh, okay. So you're basically right next to Dino dozers
in that little area or. Yeahah. Cutting off that
corner. Okay. Because that also attaches to
the food courte area. Yeah. So, I'm Blocking all that
off. So you're kind of blocking off that kind of corner
there. Awesome. Awesome. So
(35:24):
as you guys run, into. We sell drugs.
I would say that pharmacy probably
isn't super busy on Black Friday.
you sure hope it wouldn't be, you know, like, we don't want a
lot of injuries. So you guys are able to go in there, you find
Connor's insulin, he shoots up. He
doesn't want insulin. No. If we said he's low,
(35:45):
he needs food, which is what we. We don't need
food. Some glucagon. Yeah, Give him some
glucag. Some glucagon. He gets a glue and
insulin for when he comes.
A glue gun. Connor's favorite.
Connor, for the record, loves eating
glue. You run into the baby
(36:08):
store and you buy some goo goo go. Is that what you
goa. Glucaga, glucaga,
glucagon, Glucag go.
This is ridiculous. Who makes these
names? This is like I'm naturally
occurring hormone. All right, so
you grab some glucagon. I feel
ridiculous saying it. Run back to the Star wars
(36:30):
store and buy the book about the race
glucagons. Wow.
Okay. I bet Kevin would have a lot to say about this
gluc. How do you take glucagon? It
is an injection. Rectally Injection. Okay.
Thankfully, rectally. Yes.
It absorbs it quicker. They
bypass. You
(36:53):
see Connor, like, tape off his arm and,
I don't know, go stomach
o. It's like an epien. Yes. Okay.
He jams his glucag go into his
thigh. He says, right
on, Roz. I feel so much better now.
Did anyone grab me a gun? Why do you?
(37:17):
I'm still stuck on the fact that you think people who take
insulin act like junkies tying off
their arms'seen? Him do that
at game night. I don't think where I saw him,
I'never seen his ar.
You'even take there. Yeah, that's what
we're saying. He's what'saying? He ties off the arm. Was
he tapping for veins too? He must have been.
(37:39):
Hey, we need to talk to Conly. I don't
know what he was up to, I swear. I
have amazingly vivid mental
image of Connor tying off his arm
and, like, doing some kind of an injection. Maybe he was
making a joke. I don't proably. I don't
know. I don't know. Okay. Whatever he's got,
(37:59):
he's got a kit of insulin and he
took his dang glucagon.
Let's Go. And you guys run out of. We
sell drug. No, I'm gonna get some
antibiotics. Oh, you get some
antibiotics. Okay. What is it?
Tie your arm and andect that, fatty. Do
(38:21):
it, fatty. What do I need? Well, what are you looking for? Gram
positive or gram negative? Oe. He's behind the
counter,
throws it out. Out. Ye. just grab some
augment. Yes, some aug rotten.
This is where we lose, like, 95% of our audience.
(38:42):
Whatever covers. I wish I went to pharmacy
school. Auggment. Yeah,
give me some that. Ah, down the
hatch. All right, all right. You're taking. How many pills does
you take a take? Come on. All right, Tie
off my arm.
Tie your arm and then you take. You just
(39:02):
down or. What are you doing?
G. That s. That's all
I'm taking all my drugs from now
I'm gonna be at work being like, I'm about to pops of ibup propfen go
had they seem me sor of wrapping my heart.
Hony, did you get me that tight tape so I could take
my daily
vitamin'officeah?
(39:24):
T
say when Selen is to
say. Everybody runs inside it just to starts taking
medications. They're just grabbing bottles off the
shelf. I grabbed some Zola.
Some. Do they have any?
Everybody's taking claret and clear for some reason. I
don't know. Have you got any cough syrup with
(39:46):
codating? Fentanyl?
Quinn's high in the corner. Chugging
cough. I grabbed some gosh for the
pain. Some real gauze or
Joffrey. And as you rush over to him
with this gauze and start putting it on him, he says
he looks you in the eyes.
(40:10):
He looks you in the eyes and he says, this is
gonna help up people.
And as you start. Cause, oh, shoot. Is
he still on the Jeep? Oo
Joffrey. Yeah, Nobod helped him, I guess. Okay,
well, now that you got him wrapped up, do you like. What are
you doing? Because you guys are leaving the jeep here, right? Yeah.
(40:32):
Okay. I, put him on the long board.
Hey, is he still laying down
now? He's doing the super. And I grab one of his good
arms. You're just leading him.
I just drag him like a piece of luggage.
Just more moaning than, the luggage
(40:54):
as Kevin get off.
but it's so much easier with someone else just
pulling me. As you, get Joffrey off and you start to
lead him away, as you guys are starting to make yourself towards
the, security office, all of a sudden the
(41:14):
jeep lurches over
as if, like, lifted from One end and shoved
out from the other side. And coming out of
the prote Team supplement store
is a massive T
ripped zombies T.
And he says,
(41:36):
up the ladder, up the ladder, up the ladder.
you guys aren't even at the security office yet.
I mean, I guess that's a question. Are you guys running for the security
office or you gonna book?
And as you're booking it for the security office,
Kevin's hustling behind you guys. Push him
over. he dav. Pull around and shoot him in
(41:56):
kn. I mean, you can if you want to be a butthole, but let me
finish my description. Dave's pulling,
Joffrey. And Joffrey's like, I don't know what
thought going on back there, but it sounds like
something that's gonna hurt a lot of people.
It's his one line. I got to give it to him. Whenever you
can, you got do the right thing and let go.
(42:18):
I mean, it's not moving super fast, but it is.
It is focused on you guys and it is
moving in your direction. It's following. Security office
open. Yes. You guys start running down
the hallway, and you find the security office and you
burst inside. And
you're a little bit surprised to see. I mean, you're not surprised at
(42:38):
what it looks like in there, but you're a little bit surprised
at a certain aspect of what you see inside.
to the left, they have sort of like a holding
cells for shoplifters, things along those
lines. Right. People that they need to hold until the police can get there and do
the whole thing. Whatever the case. There is an individual that is
inside of the, holding cell, and he
(42:59):
says, excuse me, Excuse
me. it is quite fortuit this that you
have shown up here. Could, you perchance
let, me out? I've heard some
noises from outside. I, heard the announcement
from the police. I'm a bit cancert.
Is there a ladder? U.
(43:19):
yes. Oh, cool. Hey, so who's
going first? I pointed the ladder. Are we all inside
the office now? Yeah, yeah.
Do the crime, do the time.
I have not done any crime. It was, accident.
accidentally locked my. Well, I mean, I intentionally locked
myself in here because there was a freaky security
(43:40):
guard. His face was all rotted. He had the blood
riding all over him. And, he was going to
get. Trying to grab me. It was very
scary. So I closed the door.
they're right there and they're on like a little,
key holder. Sure. Him out quick.
Came'going up. He seems cooler than Kevin. It's
(44:00):
a mall. It's a mall holding cell. It's not
like he's a mass murder.
A ball holding
only this one. That's a good point. I was gonna say this is
like him. Okay. If the keys are on a key
ring right next to it. This is really like mar
Mayberry with, like. Yeah,
(44:21):
it's just O is the town drunk. It's like, hey,
you know, maybe like, a drunk guy comes in or some
drug. Some drug dude is, like, going nuts in the mall, and
they grab him and they take s back in cell, just tapping
away, just t off.
Oh, thank you, so much. I really appreciate it.
what are you all doing? We're leaving. Oh,
(44:44):
yeah, before that hulk comes through here.
O, you gotta go last, though. You gotta keep
lookout. That's fine with me. Okay, I'll go
first. You're the injured one. All right, I'll start up first.
How long does it take? I can use my hand, like,
my left hand to hold on so I can climb. Yeah. But I can't, like,
reach up, so it's just take me a little bit longer. But I don't see any reason why I couldn't
(45:04):
get. Okay, so, all right, I'm up.
I'm on the roof then. Yeah, I mean, you. Yeah, you. I mean, you
got time to climb up there. Okay, who's next?
I'll go next. Okay. Jackson, makes his way up the
ladder. I mean, it's pretty easy for you. it's not even something
we'th rolling for. Just to clarify, like, I mean, you're just going up a ladder. That's what it's
for, Kein. Oh, man, thank you
(45:25):
so much. Hey, you know, after we get done already.
And he goes up the ladder. Have you guys you seen Paullart
Mokov 2? It
was terrible. Speaking of diabetics, you're next.
Connor. Oh, thanks, Br. And he starts making his way
up. This whole time, he's kind of, like, been busting out his camera and filming
and stuff every once in a while. But anyway, he makes his way up. After he
(45:45):
leaves. Can I say it? Connor's now glueag gone.
Okay. You
hate it so much.
Firmly gripping my well stocked stock
pot, I ascend
ladder. Okay, sounds good, Dave.
Dave makes it out with a one arm around a
stockp pot and the other arm climbing up the ladder. But sure
(46:08):
enough, you got your presence and you are out of them all, fatty.
And, fatty. I
look down at the ground where
Joffrey is laying. Oh, no. We've got
Joffrey. Kevin, you help Joffrey.
I'm already up here. I don't know how I'm supposed to
help him. I can pull him up once he gets to how to get him up up
(46:28):
there. Is there any rope in here?
So, like, how mobile is Joffrey? Or he's basically
a. I mean, he can move on his own.
O. That's a big baby, but it's gonna be
slow. Yeah. Okay, get up there, Joffrey.
Go. Okay, that's really slow. We
should have made him go last. It hurts.
Okay, Joffrey, hold on. hold on. you're going last. He's
(46:51):
already two rungs up. Okay,
Two rungs.
Yeah, I guessap and just
set him down the.
I'm not dying to that hulking monster.
Good, Joffre. I was gonna help a
(47:12):
you people. I'm out of here, and I'm
just climbing. I literally grabbed him off
the ladder, placed himide, started climbing
up. all right, so I good, dude, you know,
but even made up, I can't in good
consciousy. He'll follow us.
He'll follow us. Barricade the door. If
he can't make it up in time, at least we don't die for him. Just
(47:34):
come on. Okay. He can climb. He's helping
a lot of people going last. That's true.
Help all of us. Yep. I will go
up and keep a shotgun pointed down behind
youre. All right. Sounds good. The meagers his way
up. All right, here's what I'mnna say. You,
climb up, and you may get to the top. You point your gun down.
(47:55):
As Joffrey is starting his ascent, all of a
sudden, the doors fly open and the massive
hulking zombie starts to walk in.
Jorey is just out of reach. But the
zombie grabs onto one of the ladder rungs and
reaches up. You have one chance to fire a shot and
hit this thing in order to keep
it back. Not Joffrey, I'm saying. So
(48:17):
roll those dice. O.
And you do have your bonus for the hunting. Yeah.
Oh, dear. Okay. No, I think that'll be fine. Because with the
dexterity and the bonus, we're saying at like,
an 11 and 11. All right, you shoot
down. I'm not going toa have your roll damage because I think basically you're
(48:38):
just trying to keep it off of Joffrey long enough for
him to make it up another couple of rungs, Kevin.
And I'm assuming you probably, since you're right, There, both reach down,
grab an arm, and help pull Joffrey up
the rest of the way. And then slam the trap
door, or whatever you want to call that, the roof door behind
you. That area is locked off. Zombies don't climb things
(48:58):
very well. The hulking zombie is
trapped inside. Guys,
I'm starting counting. Yeah. With my
finger. we've got that French dude.
No, I thought he went. Oh, no. He did. Cool.
Yeah, he'll figure it out. We look down, he'back walk.
(49:19):
And then the hoing zombie just walks up, grabs them, and
just lower. I mean, you guys
can't see. You don't know what's going on in there. You don't know. whatever the
case. Bl.
whatever the case, I would say tr.
American. you
guys rush, over to the other end of the
rooftop of the mall. There's nothing up here. I mean, it's just
(49:41):
rooftop. Also, there are no other people up here. Not currently.
But you do rush over to the other end of the mall, and you get
to the section that's above cover to cover, and
there is a section that you can open up. There's a glass,
like, overhang or whatever you want to call break out a window.
Yeah, you break out a window. That's on the rooftop window.
they have built up a bunch of bookshelves
(50:01):
to kind of create sort of bookcase staircase. they
climb up that and then between that and maybe some rope that they've
procured, you're able to pull them up so that you can get the
rest of the survivors. Oh, man, you guys never
did find that little girl, though. It was. She was.
She was in the kids. Like, there's like a. Like the
kids play peen. No, no, no, no. There's like a tree, like
(50:21):
a weird, like, tree decoration they put in the kids place to
be like, oh, yeah, growth and learning and stuff like that. Right. She
was in the little tree area. Like, literally made four
kids to be inside of. So her mom managed to Clair I
think is what her name was, managed to find her in this
time. And so she gets out as well.
I forgot about that as much as Jackson probably forgot about it. So it's not big
(50:43):
deal. whatever the case, you pull her out,
everybody, just hangs out pretty much until
midnight when a couple of helicopters come down. You
guys had seen out in the not too far off
distance, kind of surrounding the parking lot. The military forces and
whatnot. them
too, may or may not have
gotten bit o y. We'good yeah. They're
(51:04):
fine. They had agarotten potatoes.
That's secretly the cure.
whatever the case, three helicopters land,
but everybody's able to fit in two of them. one
of the military guys, from the third helicopter, he kind of looks
over at you guys. He says, was that of Almost or any others?
We don't have time to wait. No, that's it. Let's go. There's
(51:25):
a French man. He's French. Leave
him. We don't have time to wait. So I guess it doesn't
hour. But if there's only one survivor, that's not bad.
They all take off. the first helicopter
with, the other group of survivors in it tanks off and
starts heading away. Then you guys start to take off. In
roughly about the same time, the third helicopter that's empty starts to
(51:47):
take off. And as this happens, you
see the little hatch from the security room open up.
And the Frenchman kind of drags himself out
from inside of it and he.
Yeah, like Terminator. And you see him rush over
and there's a duffel bag that's sitting over right
next to that exit way that he opens up and
(52:07):
withdraws a rocket launcher.
And he turns and he points it towards the
empty helicopter and fires. And you
can see the rocket go flying, spinning ever so
slightly. Slams into
the empty helicopter. Well, I say empty, it has the soldiers in it.
But whatever the case, it hits the helicopter, which starts
(52:28):
to spin crazy out of control,
slamming down into the parking lot where a
whole bunch of the, various, you know, soldiers
and police and such were. It causes a small explosion
there. Right? he kind of waves at you
guys and he picks up a little like, something in his hand and he
just pushes like there's a button. And you see a
(52:48):
bunch of small explosions shatter the glasses at
each one of the entrances of the mall. And
zombies start to flood outwards
towards the disoriented police
forces, that are outside. And as
you guys fly away, the last thing that you guys can see down
below you is a whole bunch of undead
chaos as it starts to flood out of
(53:11):
the mall and into the city.
He was the zombie master the whole
time. May have been that
piece of garbage. Never trust a Frenchman. I said
it. And he's like, oh, he's in the M.O.L. s good.
He did leave him with a zombie.
Unbelievable. Oh, maybe they
kiss. Ah. they were in love. It was a
(53:33):
romance. warm
bodies. That's right. All right, thank you all for
listening to our all flesh must be eaten. One
shot kind of left things open ended. Maybe. Maybe
more happens later on. Who knows. We'll see you next
time on Session Zero Heroes
thank you all for joining us for another episode of our All
Flesh Must Be Eaten One Shot Black Friday of the
(53:56):
Day, which represents our celebration of the holiday season.
We hope youre enjoying a little zombie fighting action amidst your
Christmas fun. If you are, we encourage you to check out some of our
other series such as our Avatar Legends long term campaign
Benders and Brws which is set in the world of av, the Last
Airbender or our Dungeons of Dragons long term
series Criminals of Isla Numis. If youre looking for
(54:16):
more spooky actual PL content from us, I
encourage you to go check out our Hunters Haven series which
now has two different stories, Music Mayhem, which
was written and run by Cameron who you heard in this series
and Trick or Treat, Fight or Flee which was written
by Nate Vagart who you can hear play in our Escape from Dino
Island One Shot. Whatever you listen to next, be sure
(54:37):
to follow or subscribe to the Session Zero Heroes podcast on
your preferred podcast streaming platform. You can find us
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YouTube. Following the show ensures that you dont miss out on
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(54:57):
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of the above. Its a great way to keep up with our upcoming
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us. We appreciate you taking a listen. The series
(55:17):
will air through the month of November 2024 and into
December 2024, so be sure to swing back to get
the rest of the exciting conclusion to this special
holiday zombie series. Well see you guys next time.
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