June 30, 2025 • 72 mins
What YOU Do Matters...Your Life Is Speaking—Whether You Know It or Not
On Father's Day at Outreach 419, Chaplain Heidi Woldhuis delivered a powerful reminder that what you do matters—even when you think it doesn’t.
“So many of us think, ‘I’m not important, I don’t matter.’ But everything you do creates a ripple effect in someone else’s life.”
Through stories of history, heartbreak, and redemption, Heidi calls us to live with intention, to love boldly, and to speak up when it matters most. Whether you’ve been silent out of fear or just wondering if your life has purpose—this message is for you.
“If you are not making decisions to influence the world for the good, you are letting the world influence you for the worse.”
🌐 Learn more: outreach419.com
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Episode Transcript
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(00:00):
got the shirt on.
I got this shirt at the Holocaust Museum.
It was when I finished that that ithit me so fully What I wanted to talk
about today, what we do truly matters.
(00:22):
I had the privilege of walkingthrough that museum, which was
gut wrenchingly difficult to do.
To see what humanity does to humanityis horrendous To see when you're
looking at video and photos of realthings that happened, when you see
bodies just stacked up like bales ofhay, just waiting to get it, it's.
(00:47):
If that doesn't do somethingto you, I pray for you.
But just prior to that, we had gone tosee the Lincoln Memorial, and I remember
standing in that place and I read everyinscription engraved into that granite.
And then we went to the MartinLuther King Jr. Memorial.
And again, I walked around and Itook in all the engravings on all
(01:10):
the stone around there and I satand I started thinking about it.
And it struck me that we so often ashuman beings think that how much of an
effect does my life have on the world?
It doesn't affect much.
It's just me.
I'm just one person.
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But I started thinking, and I don'tthink Abraham Lincoln and Martin
Luther King, Jr. I don't think whenthey were little that they ever
envisioned that they were gonna be ona monument for all to see, for history.
I don't think that they realizedthat choices and decisions they were
gonna make, were gonna cause them tobe forever remembered as heroes for
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fighting for true noble worthy causes.
For daring to stand up and say, this isnot okay, and doing something about it.
I'm sure that they had momentswhere they're like, I'm one person.
I'm just one person here in this world.
But then they did it, and then Istarted thinking through history
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and over and over and over and over.
We have examples of people thatchose to be brave in moments
when so many others didn't.
And there's such beauty in thatbecause it's terrifying to be a lone
voice standing up there and facing it.
(02:40):
So I sat with that at the beginningof my trip all the way through
until today, and it didn't change.
I know I often come in here and say,I knew exactly what I was gonna say,
and then God's like, no, you don't.
But this one hasn't ever changed.
It's just been building andbuilding and building, and building.
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I'm just so sure of it because Ithink a lot of us sitting here don't
realize how much of an impact ourlives make on this world around us.
Every single one of you does, even if youthink you don't, the one in sitting in
here that thinks they're the smallest,least important person in this world, I'm
telling you, your lives makes ripples thatjust spread and you don't even realize.
(03:23):
And that's what I wanna talk about today.
What you do matters.
We're gonna read today from Romansfive 18 through 19, and the more I
said about this, I'm probably gonnakinda run through most of the little
slides that I have up here right away.
And then I just wanna talk aboutthis and we'll see where it goes.
(03:47):
So here it is again.
We take this from the message, soit's gonna sound differently than
if you're used to King James or NIV.
This is the message version.
So here it is in a nutshell, just as oneperson did it wrong and got us in all this
trouble with sin and death, that beingAdam, another person did it right and got
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us out of it, but more than just gettingus out of trouble, he got us into life.
Of course, we're talking about Jesus.
One man, Adam said no to God andput many people in the wrong.
But one man, Jesus said yes to God.
And put many in the right.
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We can read in the Bible andwe have so many examples.
We have Adam, we have Moses.
Moses who's like, Ican't lead these people.
I, I have a stutter.
I can't do this.
I'm just one person tried to run away.
But no, it came down to Moses.
I'm sure he didn't grow up in the palacethinking he was gonna be a great leader
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of the Israelites out of Egypt on a 40year journey and forever talked about
when it comes to the faith, Abraham,Daniel, Esther Rahab, not even an
Israelite, and she was a prostitute,
but she's listed in the line,the family line of Jesus now
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because of what she chose to do.
John the Baptist.
Mary and Joseph, you wanna talk about twopeople that decided to do the right thing,
Joseph, and that culture would've walkedaway from her and Mary faced stoning.
That's what typically happened in those,but they chose to do things different.
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Mary Magdalene didn't have a greatreputation, but she was the first
at the tomb, the first to worship,the first to just believe, I believe
you, Jesus, the woman at the well.
Do you know how many peoplewere converts because of her?
I think we gloss over that because we gettoo concerned to make sure people know
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how horrible she was at vile Wicked woman.
You know, I have opinions on thattoo, and what likely put her in that
position, but why do we gloss over whathappened after she was so excited to
run back to town and because of her?
Her, that woman that we've chose totrash over and over and over in so
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many churches on Sunday, literallyhad over 3000 people believing by the
time somebody came back and visited.
That's a big deal.
That is a huge deal becauseof her excitement to share
what Jesus did in her life.
Then we have today's examples.
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Rosa Parks.
We know about Fred Rogers.
Interesting one to put on here,but look what he's done for this
nation and what he's brought.
He's saw that we need some gentlenessin love and kindness in community.
So he started with the children.
If we could get the childrenraised like this and we talk,
we'll talk about him forever.
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Mr. Rogers.
Gentle.
Mr. Rogers.
Harriet Tubman.
Malala.
You Zi.
If you don't, sorry, Ibutchered her last name.
If you don't know her.
I mean, she was a Middle Easternwoman that was, they attempted to
burn her alive and she survived it.
And, um, because she wanted aneducation as a woman, Florence
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Nightingale, I love what she did.
She allowed me to be aparamedic and revolutionize
medicine and how we treat it.
She believed in something, tooka stand, stood up to men, and
she changed how we do that.
Abraham Lincoln, we alreadyknow Mother Theresa.
What a wonderful example of just, I'mone woman and all I wanna do is just
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love people in the streets and look atthe impact in how we talk about her.
Martin Luther King, Jr. Nelson Mandela,
those were all people that had a vision,an idea, a belief, and a thought.
And they stood up and bravelysaid, I'm gonna live this way,
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even when it's swimming upstream.
I'm willing to stand there anddo what most people aren't doing.
In Galatians five verse nine, it says, itonly takes a minute amount of yeast, you
know, to permeate an entire loaf of bread.
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And they're like, well, there's Heidi.
The baker talking about baking bread.
Well, there's a reason for that.
A, I love to make bread, but it's moreabout this minute amount of yeast.
It's an analogy.
It takes one bad apple toboil the whole bunch, right?
A little bit of rot doesn't stay, alittle bit of rot, a little bit of bad can
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become great bad if it's not controlled.
It's why when people remain silent, whenevil starts to get loud and I'm just not
gonna get involved, that's not my thing.
That's too far away.
What happens?
I think the Jews showed us
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what happened to them,how many millions of them
paid with their life because A, my noonamount of yeast called Adolf Hitler
knew how to talk to people.
There's no denying that that manknew how to talk and speak and lead.
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That's not me saying he was a great man.
He was a great man for evil, but thatman knew how to lead because people
listened to him when he talked.
I sit and think, you know, it's realeasy appear to say, oh, but if that was
happening now and I was in that country,there is no way I'd go along with it.
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Really?
Do you think all the people in Germany,if they would've been told 20 years
earlier, you are all gonna sit andsilently follow this person and you're
gonna allow millions of people to beslaughtered brutally simply because
they were born Jewish and they, I'msure would say there is no way I
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would never do that, but it happened.
Right?
Why?
How did that happen?
But it didn't just happen then.
'cause I think, do you even know howmany people are in slavery today?
Mm-hmm.
All over the world.
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Like hundreds of millions of people.
Do you know that the United Statesalone, they know for a fact that there
are over a million people in slavery.
That includes
selling of self, children, traffickingover a million people in our country
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alone, and we rank way lower than manyother that have millions upon millions
upon millions of people enslaved.
But we're over here and life is great.
I'm in the United States.
I am free, but in my freecountry, there are slaves.
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I don't know what to do about that.
I don't.
I can speak about it.
I will be aware of it.
I will never support it.
But then it spreads and it getsbigger because it starts to call into
question, well, what do you do then?
Because you know, I had this wholething like, and again, I'm just
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going to use this as an exampleand pro, I promise you, I have no
issue with you wearing Nike shoes.
I don't because I justgot some yesterday myself.
But I have to remember and somehowfigure out what do I do with the
knowledge that the Uyghurs in China arean enslaved population that is being
brutalized, sterilized their childrentaken away and slaughtered and used
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as free slave labor to make them.
My desire for stuff comesat the cost of humanity.
My desire for all that cheap stuff that Iwant, that we have, so much of it comes on
the back of human beings that are slaves.
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And that's hard to imagine becauseit doesn't personally come into my
space over here in the United States.
But I can look around my house and Isee all the things that very likely were
produced by slaves, many of them children.
So who of you here has kids or grandkids?
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Which one of 'em do you wannabe slave labor making shoes for
rich people in other countries?
Which one would you pick andsay, well, that one can do it.
My family might havepicked me, but that's okay.
So, um, those are hard things though.
Those are really hard things.
'cause what do you do?
What do you do when something is this big?
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Like the economy of the world nowhas become dependent on slave labor.
The numbers I was looking at, do youknow how many slaves are in India?
Over 11 million.
11 million.
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There's almost 9 million inChina, over a million here
Africa, tens of millions, like we'retalking slaves, like real life slaves.
And it all started as thatminute amount of yeast.
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It all started with somebody saying, Iwant power and I'm gonna take it by force,
and I wanna make more money and I wannaget richer, and I know how to do it.
I'm gonna do it on the backsof people I don't like.
I'm gonna wipe 'em out, eliminate it.
We've got wars going on all over tryingto eliminate populations and peoples.
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And it's horrible.
The Bible talks aboutpeople like this too.
It started with Kaan first murder.
He brought murder into this world.
There's Jezebel, Judas Acat, a Bialek,Herod, Pharaoh, Haman, Delilah.
Oh, because of Satan.
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The original, the evil doneby them is astonishing.
And then we get this, just a few.
This isn't even really that modern AdolfHitler, Joseph Stalin, Pulpo Leopold,
Saddam Hussein be Mussolini Heinrich heel
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evil
done to people, to humanity.
Do you know how many deaths arerepresented by just these names?
And this is just the tip of the iceberg.
Do you know how manypeople were slaughtered?
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Because they all started out as littlebit of yeast had an idea and somehow
it was implemented.
Proverbs 29, verse 25 saysthis, the fear of human opinion
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disables, but trusting in God.
It protects you from that.
Lemme see what I got,
which brings it all to this.
The power.
Of one.
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I talked earlier about theripples that our lives have.
Every single one of us, ourlives affects other people.
I know a lot of times in my past I'mlike, I can choose to do what I want.
'cause it doesn't hurt anybody else.
It doesn't affect anybody else.
And I'm sorry.
It does though.
If you are living, breathinghuman beings in this world,
everything you do has a ripple.
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Whether it's just a very small one or ifit goes on and on and on and on, because
what you do affects another person.
But then whose lives doall of those people affect?
And then whose do they affectand then whose do they affect?
It's not all about us.
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That's why being self-centered,prideful, arrogant, egotistical,
it's why it's so dangerous.
It is why the worst of theworst starts happening when it
comes all the way down to self.
It's me, me, me, me, all about me.
We're human beings and we're all about me.
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Kind of people like we wanna be something,we wanna be recognized, we wanna be
noticed, we want the pat on the back.
We wanna be recognizedwhen we've done something,
but do we stop to realize the effect thatwe have even in our day to day choices?
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You know, I think of Father's Dayand I think of the effect that
fathers have in the house and onchildren, and it's a profound one.
A lot of us here are in recovery and we'vehad experiences that probably haven't
brought the best ripples into our home.
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And those ripples spilled over onto thosethat we loved the most, which then spilled
onto others who loved them and on and on.
It wasn't our intent, but when we touchthe surface, there's no helping it.
It happens.
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This isn't a guilt or ashamed anybody.
It's just it is what it is.
I can say that as a mom,my ripples hurt my kids.
My choices hurt my children, and thenmy children and their interactions.
There was a fallout and it spilledout from there and on and on and on.
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I think it's why the Bible talksabout the iniquity or the sin of the
father from generation to generation.
Think of it as ripples, the resultsof choices that you've made.
You know, I'm watching that in my family.
My family is a, it's a hot mess.
Doesn't look at it, it doesn't lookanything at all, like what the Bible
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might say a family should look like.
You know, the whole thing.
It doesn't, it's broken, shattered,there's, there's hate and there's love,
and there's separation and shunning andthere's all this stuff and it's awful.
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Those are all ripples of people makingthe choices that they've made in life.
I think of those dads, or
we'll just say men or women whomay have stepped up to be a parent
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in the life of a child that isn't.
Their natural born child.
Do you think there's not power in that?
Don't let it be lost on you.
What a beautiful thing it is to stepinto the life of a child and fill a void
and step up and be that person in thatchild's life when you didn't have to.
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I'm very thankful
that my children have a good man to haveaccess to in their life, who genuinely
cares about them, who doesn't resent them?
Because I see that a lot.
We get in these relationships, you know,and then we can bring kids into it.
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Well, yeah, we're reallyinto them, but not the kids.
Well, I'm sorry.
You don't get to choose that.
You do not get to choose that,and if you ever try to make
somebody choose shame on you.
Mm-hmm.
Don't ever make somebodychoose you over their children.
I've been asked to do that.
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Make me more important than your kids.
I matter more than your kids do.
Hmm.
I know that biblically speaking, thatrelationship in the home, that has to
be the primary one and then the kids,but it's not at the expense of kids.
Don't get that wrong.
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The reason this becomes primaryis so the kids get the best.
This primary relationship athome will never tell you to make
your kids less important ever.
Don't resent them.
If you want a relationship withtheir parent, build a relationship
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with their children too.
And just a little FYI for you guys.
There's nothing that warms a motherheart more than to see her children
well loved by people and cared about.
I love to watch this community ofmen here, the way they come around
each other, the way they come around,the other men in this group, the way
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they come around, the younger guys.
I love that.
I'm gonna ask you to continue to do that.
And in fact, I'm gonna challengeyou to do more of that.
Like to stand up and be men,like good ones, showing others.
This is what real men do.
Women have to do the same.
I'm not excluding you,it's just Father's Day.
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So I'm trying to, youknow, like work that in.
So there I did that, but I'mjust gonna go to all of us.
Let's all stand up and focus on being.
Those examples that say, even though mostpeople do it this way, I'm not going to,
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the power that is in us toaffect the lives around us is
far greater than we realize.
And that's the danger in it becausewe often don't stop to think about it.
That really bad, awful day you'rehaving where you lash out at somebody
who has nothing to do with anythingat all that's going on in your life.
Like me, with that poor girl atthe lemonade stand, that didn't
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put enough lemon in my drink.
I wasn't upset with her, she didn'tdo anything wrong, and yet me being
me, this is a little frustrated'cause I had to wait in line.
Well, of course it's a huge busy fare.
What do you expect?
You're gonna wait in line.
I just didn't feel likewaiting in line that day.
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That has ripple effects.
You know, I walk up there and justkind of, I wasn't outright rude.
It was like the passive aggressive,rude, where it's like, oh, is it?
You know?
And I'm so embarrassed about that.
Oh, I did clean that up.
I did share with that.
I went and found herand I apologized to her.
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But
it matters greatly how weinteract with people around us.
I don't know what my behavingthat way did to her in her day.
I don't know what she was going through.
And then I had to add to it really?
Really?
Because did I wannachange places with her?
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Heck no.
I don't wanna squeeze lemonsand batter hand batter corn dogs
all day long in a little trailerfor a bunch of people at a fair.
I don't want that job.
So why wasn't I grateful that shewas willing to do that for me?
I could have made her day so good.
Mm-hmm.
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But instead I approached that andI was that little bit of yeast.
I could almost cry thinking about that.
'cause I don't wannabe that in this world.
I had chosen that moment to behavemore like a little bit of yeast
instead of being a little bit of love,or better yet a whole lot of love.
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Think about your actions.
Think about a more thanjust this present time.
Think about it more thanjust the here and now.
Yeah.
I'm in a really bad new mood and I, ugh.
Just had to get off my chest andjust say, yeah, now I feel better.
Well, that's great for you or for me, butwhat about the one that we dumped that on?
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What happened to the ripples from there?
Where did that fall out on?
I think that's why the Bible overand over and over and over, talks
about serving and loving each other.
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I don't find in the Bible whereit says it's all about self first.
You first make sure you're first in line.
Make sure you get the biggest portion.
Make sure when you go througha buffet line, you've got both
plates filled to overflowing,even though it's a packed house.
And some people at the end won't get some.
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Well, they should have been in line first.
I know some people havehad those thoughts.
At least I'm hoping because Iused to kind of like think, you
know, hurry up and get in there.
'cause that looks real good.
Well, it probably looks good toeverybody, so maybe if I took a
little bit, everybody can get some.
Mm-hmm.
Because that whole me first thing,that's the worst kind of yeast.
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Jesus very clearly spoke about that.
The ones who want to be firstand greatest and best, where
you're gonna end up is last.
You're gonna be back of the line,get back there with your fine self.
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But the ones that serve, the onesthat aren't looking for the limelight,
the ones that aren't trying to bethe big deal on the playground.
King of the hill, greatest ofthe great, the richest, the
most accomplished, the most.
Fill in the blank.
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The ones who instead chooseto serve and to love everybody
they come in contact with.
Those are the ones that changed the world.
I don't think it was hate that causedAbraham Lincoln to make a decision
that I'm sure tore him apart.
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I am sure that when you becomepresident of a country, the last thing
you wanna do is declare a war thatyou know is gonna rip it in half.
It is just one issue though.
Maybe let's just keep the country unitedand maybe, we'll, just through talking
about it and stuff, it'll get better.
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Again, it's slavery, thebuying and selling of people.
To be treated worse than animals.
And Abraham Lincoln said,
I have to fight this.
I'm pretty certain hedidn't get a lot of love.
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Some people did, but he caused alot of ripples and the damage and
death because of his decision.
I'm sure haunted him.
But he still stood up andsaid Slavery is wrong.
And then Martin Luther King,think of the time he was in.
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My family's fairly racist,
not even fairly.
That's how I was raised.
I can only imagine what he was up against.
I can only imagine what he heardbecause God in his wisdom and love.
Said, I want Martin Luther KingJr. To be born African American
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with dark skin and black Afro hair.
I'm gonna give him this amazingmind and I'm gonna give him courage.
And he became a voice and he died for it
because wrong is wrong.
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If 99 people out of a hundredsay this is okay, and we continue
to do it, but it's wrong.
I pray that there's one personthat'll say, but I can't.
Even when it's standing up to 99,
it is so important to take that timeand choose carefully how you interact
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with people, how you're gonna live yourlife, how you're gonna portray yourself.
In those of you in this recoverycommunity, the power you have to impact
people coming along behind you andshowing them the way people come in
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here and the first thing you do isn'tpoint out, oh, I remember you from
before when you did this, or, I don'tthink you should be here, or I don't
trust you, or whatever it may be.
You meet them exactly where they're at,and then you show them a way forward
that looks completely different thanwhat was, you don't meet people and
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live with them like it was the past.
You're like, this is here and now, andthis is who I am, and you're living this
life out loud and you're standing upand you're talking about it out loud.
I am so thankful that in this littlearea, we don't talk about recovery
and silence during these little hushedvoices and little closed off rooms.
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We're not ashamed of our recovery here.
Being sober isn't something to
being a former drunk isn'tsomething that I have shame about.
I will gladly tell you about itbecause I love telling you about now.
Yeah.
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Being an addict isn't a shameful thingbecause you get to tell them about, now,
it can be a challenge though
to not get lured back by the peoplearound you, family, old friends,
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just this perceived idea, but,oh yeah, this is what I have to.
Give off though.
I'm this person.
It's not me, but this is the,I just, this is, this is that.
This is me now.
This is that.
Look, I gotta be like this.
Just simply be you.
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If you feel a passion for something,for have the courage to step into that.
If you see something isn't right,
have the courage to standup and say This isn't right.
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It is scary stuff.
'cause I've had to do alittle bit of that lately.
Um, my position and my thoughtprocesses have changed quite a
bit on how I see certain things.
I. And I found myself in conversationswith people that intentionally have put
me there because they want to nail medown on something and call me out on it.
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So I better be realsure of what I stand on.
I have to be,
um,
standing up for right isn't alwaysgonna be the easiest thing to do.
And most of the time sayingnothing is so much easier.
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I'm not gonna say anything,
doesn't mean that I agree withthem, but you know, I'm not
gonna say anything about it.
You are not saying something is ripplesbecause who is gonna say something who.
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If you won't, and you know somethingis very wrong and you won't
say something, are you waitingfor somebody else to, and why?
How big does something have to getbefore we're willing to then stand up?
Or are we waiting for other people?
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So we're not the only one?
Because sometimes we are calledto be the only one because maybe
those people were waiting for youto get up there and say something.
Maybe God put that on you tostand up there and say no,
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to stand up to it, to defend.
We're called to do that.
The poor, the oppressed, thehelpless, the afflicted, the
imprisoned, the slaves, the orphans.
The hurting the widow.
We're told we're supposed to do that.
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Do we?
I, I always thought thatwhy I do those things.
No, I didn't.
I might've said words in thesafe circles to say them, but
did I openly stand up for them?
(36:08):
Usually not.
Usually not.
Um,
examples, I'll give you an examplethat I have going on currently.
I have had pushback and questioningbecause I am going to have a table
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and represent I. At a pride eventat the end of this month, offering
the services that we provide here topeople in that community that have
a need for sobriety and recovery.
And I can tell you, I have notheard positive feedback about it.
I have had people asking me, whywould you do that and put your
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organization's reputation on the line?
I said, I'm doing it because I'mcalled by Jesus to love everybody.
I'm called by Jesus to lovepeople exactly where they're at.
And if I'm not willing to do that,how will they ever know Jesus?
Because at the end of the day, Idon't care about anything other
than can I tell you about Jesus?
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If you wanna know abouthim because he loves you,
and if you have a battle witha substance use, we are here to
help you because I don't wantanybody left to live in that hell.
I am called to be a light inthis world everywhere I go,
(37:39):
so I can promise you I will never be ata protest against a pride event ever.
I will likely not be at a protestbecause I find it difficult to
love somebody when I'm protesting.
(38:06):
I would never have represented myselfin an organization at a Pride event
before because I would've let otherpeople's opinions override my own in
the fear that somebody might thinknegatively about outreach 4 1 9.
(38:27):
And you know what?
If you're gonna have a problem withme or this place because I am bringing
service information to an event,
so be it.
'cause I'm gonna be therebecause I will be there gladly.
(38:53):
Because I have found absolutefreedom in my call to love.
It was so freeing to shed the thoughtthat I needed to judge somebody and
make sure they knew my judgments.
(39:15):
And then God's like, so glad you goteverything right in your life, kid.
I'm sure glad you got it all figured out.
'cause I needed help to judge people.
I feel such shame over pastthoughts and ideas and opinions.
(39:39):
But then I let that go because again,I was raised in an environment.
Kids learn what they learn.
That's why I'll go back to parents,the ripple effects you have.
If you have a household ledwith love, what will come out of
there will be goodness that willcontinue far beyond your life.
(40:06):
But when you plant seeds of hateor non-acceptance or exclusion
or love, everybody accept, whatdo those little seeds become?
It's that yeast.
Tell me when planting a seed of hateever resulted in a crop of good.
(40:29):
If you think of all those thingsas seeds, what's gonna come out of
it when you water it and grow it?
Because that little bit of hatewhat happens when it's multiplied.
But the same thing happenswith the good and love
(40:51):
we have the perfect example in Jesus.
We often forget too,
that Jesus was radical.
I think a lot of people todayin organized religion would
have an issue with Jesus too.
If he showed up and operated the wayhe did then because he didn't operate
(41:14):
the way people thought he should.
You wanna talk about ripples?
His, the ripples he leftwere like shockwaves.
He turned everything upside downbecause he took the rules and the law
out of it and said, lead with love.
(41:35):
Because when you lead with love, youdon't need a bunch of rules and laws to
tell you that what you're doing is wrong.
You don't murder peoplewhen you're loving them.
You don't steal from peoplewhen you're loving them.
You're not cheating and hatingand deceiving and full of envy
(42:00):
when you are busy loving people.
Jesus was radical.
He loved when peoplewould expect him to hate.
His anger was towards the peopleyou would've thought were the ruling
(42:22):
leaders of the religious law inchurch, and that's when he got upset.
But the people he hung out with
were us.
(42:45):
The people he would've gone to findwere the people that are rejected.
So think about the groups that todayare rejected, who suffer, who are on
the receiving end of hate and rejection.
We're called to the same thing.
(43:12):
I was so profoundly affected in Washingtonafter getting outta that Holocaust museum.
I had had two beautiful examplesof men who chose to just love
and stand up to awfulness.
Both of them died for it.
Both of them sacrificed theirlife for it, both of them.
(43:36):
That doesn't sound like a fun outcome tostand up to evil and get killed for it.
Although for me, the way I believethe good stuff just begins then.
I'm not afraid to die.
I don't want to, but I'm not afraid to.
(43:57):
Two men saw things were so wrong andthey're like, I'll do something about it.
Do you think either one thought they.
Would start something asbig as what it became?
I don't think so.
But that other example of Hitler asI went through the Holocaust museum,
(44:19):
'cause it's like I felt so good.
Like, it's like it was amazingwhat these two men did.
Like, you know, bringingfreedom to slaves and
equal rights.
You know, racism is just so wrong.
And both of them champions for that.
And that was amazing.
And then I stood face to face withHitler and I couldn't shake the
(44:44):
feeling of, I'm looking at whathappens when good people stay silent.
And we see a lot ofthat in the world today.
There are a lot of reallygood people staying silent.
They're not saying anything.
Nah, it is what it is.
(45:05):
It's over there.
What am I gonna do about it?
It's on the other side of the country.
It's in another country,it's in a different county
or it's in a different city.
Or it's
are you even bringing it to God?
(45:26):
Thank God I don't know what I can do,but I know that you can change this
if you hear somebody talking aboutit or if they talk about it with you.
Do you stand up then for people?
I know that it hasn't been real popularthe couple times and I don't do it
anymore, but couple times when I'vementioned it's like, do you know where all
(45:49):
our cheap Chinese goods are coming from?
Do you know who's making those?
You know, we've got, sheen is sopopular 'cause they're so cheap.
It's, it's really cheap on my pocketbook.
But the cost of making, it wasn't
(46:13):
my desire to have that meantlooking somebody in the eye.
'cause it's no different.
And saying, I don't care about your life.
I don't care that you're a slave.
I don't care that you don't get paid.
I don't care that yourchildren were taken from you.
I don't care that you were forciblysterilized and I don't care that
you guys are being killed off.
(46:33):
Just make more of that cheapgarbage so I can buy it for cheap.
And it doesn't sit well sometimes.
And then it's the old, oh, but it's justso expensive to buy, you know, something
made in America A do I really need it?
Do we really need more cheap stuffbecause it's just super cute and we got
(47:00):
it for, you know, $6 instead of 1999.
And I am not saying this to guilt anybodybecause this is a struggle that I have.
Mm-hmm.
At what point do I say, you know what?
I have to take a hard stand evenif it doesn't make a difference,
(47:24):
do I say to the best of my ability,I, I, no, because my having this
isn't worth somebody's freedom.
We're so fortunate here, likeour minds I don't think can
grasp the idea of being a slave.
We can't grasp, some of ushave been in jail and prison.
(47:47):
I know I'm married to one,and I know many of us here,
we even in their head, more freedomsthan modern day slaves have.
(48:09):
If we are people who say we are childrenof God, followers of Jesus, that means
we have to be people that are willingto follow through on what that means.
Even when it's hard and when it'sunpopular, you may have to stand
up to your friends, your family.
(48:32):
You may get laughedat, you may get mocked.
Well, last I knew, getting laughedat and mocked and never hurt anybody.
You might not like it, butit's not gonna kill you.
I can handle it because I knowthe reason for what I believe.
If you wanna laugh at me or mock meor ridicule me because of standing
(48:57):
up for something that I believeshould be stood up for, go ahead.
It gets a little harder on thoseissues that could put you in a position
where you could be killed for it.
Are we people that arewilling to do that too?
Are we?
(49:17):
Well, I don't really believe this.
This isn't how I think, but I'm gonna sayit 'cause I don't wanna get hurt and I get
that self preservation's a strong thing.
But is it the right thing all the time.
I wish life was black and white.
(49:38):
I really do.
I wish there wasn't so much gray in lifethat we had to navigate and get through.
But even as I say that, good and evil,that's a pretty black and white issue.
(49:58):
Something that's good.
Can't be evil and somethingthat's evil can't be good.
That makes that a black and white issue.
It's humans that have put allkinds of gray on it though
because it's more comfortable.
(50:23):
There is power in one.
We've got all kinds of examples of it,but we've got the ultimate example.
Jesus,
one person was the downfallof the entire world.
One, and guess what?
It wasn't Eve, it wasAdam says So in the Bible,
(50:47):
it's Adam held responsible forthe downfall, which meant that
humanity had to pay for it.
And he showed up as Jesus.
Two examples, one of bad and oneof good, but it shows you what
(51:10):
happens through one individual.
I believe there's people in here that aregonna be people that are gonna make some
really big ripples, and that's amazing.
I can't wait to see it.
But do you know what I love even moreis that all of us here are capable of
(51:31):
doing those gentle, quiet ripples underthe surface of kindness and goodness
and love and support and acceptance.
'cause how does it feel when you getthat from people who here hates to
be loved and cared for and supported?
Who hates it?
(51:51):
Who doesn't want any of it?
I'm so glad I didn't see a hand goup 'cause I was gonna chastise you.
Not really thought about it.
I'll call you liars.
I'll call you liars.
We can handle it here.
We'll laugh about it.
So if it feels that good to receive it,why aren't you somebody that gives that?
(52:18):
It's very easy to be a jerk tosomebody who's a jerk to you.
And guess what?
Now you got two jerks,
right?
Right.
You started out with one.
Think of that as that yeast.
Ha.
I'm gonna treat you like thisbecause you came at me first.
(52:41):
Can I use you as an example?
Sure.
Okay.
I don't know what the exampleis, so I'm cringing right now.
My husband, who I lovedearly so much, he is my one.
Sometimes his prison shows orhis dry drunk shows when it
(53:05):
feels he is been disrespected
and I can see it happening too.
I'm like, oh no.
His ripples vary depending on the day.
Sometimes he catches it early andother times I might have to be
(53:28):
a husband that I love so much.
Can I talk to you aboutsomething I. Because without
thinking, sometimes we react.
Yep.
Mm-hmm.
And I get it 'cause I do too becausemy husband over there can tell
you all the examples of my drydrunk and there's a lot of them.
'cause I can react too, pull out in frontof me when there's not much traffic.
(53:52):
When you could have waited andOh, you're gonna get dry drunk.
I'm working on it, but it's still there.
I don't know why that won't leave.
I don't know why.
It just, Ooh.
Because it goes from thatimmediately to like, oh great.
Every light in Greenville's gonna bered and it's gonna take me 47 minutes
(54:13):
just to get through downtown Greenville.
This is insane.
It's a little country town.
Not Chicago or Detroit or Washington.
But no, that's just me being drydrunk and having an attitude and
I'm getting better at catching it.
My husband.
(54:33):
Is very good at being teachable,but he's also catching it
and then he takes care of it.
And I love that about him.
When he's done wrong, he, to the bestof his ability, goes to make sure that
that is attended to and taken care of.
(54:53):
So our ripples, it might start outnot that great, but we can take
care of that, and that changes thoseripples going forward from that.
It's not too late.
So don't underestimate the power thatyou have in this world, especially
(55:14):
when you're walking with God,because then it just is not you.
And I'm telling you, it's not justyou because when you said yes to
God, you said yes, I love you Jesus.
I want everything thatyou have given to me.
You are given the spirit who lives in you.
You are not alone.
(55:34):
It is never you against anything.
It's you and the creator of theuniverse walking through life
because there's nothing to win.
It's already been done,
but he called you to bea light in this world.
And that means, especially when thereis darkness and awfulness, that's
(55:57):
especially where you need to shine.
You need to be brave enoughto stand up and say, no Uhuh.
Maybe it's in your family.
Some of us have had tobreak generational curses.
And again, I will say to you, I am sosorry 'cause that price tag is huge.
I'm one of them.
(56:19):
I know the price tag.
Yeah, but do you know what else I foundout there was great honor in God seeing
something and giving something to me thatallowed me to be equipped to do that.
And the same for all of you thathave, you could have said no
(56:43):
and then you would've continuedmore generational curses and
more generational curses.
But you said no, you couldchoose to live just angry all
the time because this isn't fair.
Not how I want it not going my way.
I'm doing it right and I'mstill having to pay the prices.
(57:04):
Did you ever ask, why is Godallowing me these lessons?
It's a different way oflooking at the rough stuff.
And I know it's not easy 'cause Ihave bad day and there's times I, I
don't wanna ask myself that question.
Tired of learning.
But on the other side of it,I'm really glad that I learned.
(57:28):
I'm really glad that I let go of myanger 'cause I was so convinced that
I was justified, but the ripplesI was putting out into the world,
because I was surrounded with anger.
Everybody who came in my orbitknew it in one way or another.
It didn't even come outas anger, but negativity,
(57:52):
that constant negativity, there'susually loneliness, trauma,
bitterness, or anger at the root of it.
None of those feel good andnone of those help you, and it
only hurts those around you.
(58:17):
Pause before you react.
Pause before you think,
but also be bold enough to speak when youshould love people enough to stand up for
the people that need to be stood up for.
(58:38):
I mean, it wasn't a difficult thingfor me to go to Washington, talk to
a bunch of people who most peoplewould think of way out of your league.
I didn't see 'em that way.
I saw all of your faces, and I'mlike, it's the only way I can bring
the whole group in front of 'em.
We're all as a group, we'rein front of this person.
(59:01):
We're talking to you becausewe're looking to make things
better and you're all worth it.
So I don't care who you are, whatyour title is, what your job is,
and I don't care that I'm justHeidi from Fenwick because I'm not.
Just Heidi from Fenwick.
I am Heidi from Fenwick, daughterof the King, his favorite.
(59:27):
And it's not just me.
It's not just me.
I have something to say and I believein what I have to say and I will say it.
And I don't care if some peoplewon't like it or receive it.
At least I'm trying to get to that.
I do.
I hate when I know people don'tlike me, but I'm learning.
(59:47):
Not everybody's gonna like me.
My skin is very thin,but I'm getting there.
But at the same time, I don'twanna completely lose that.
Don't get so thick skin thatyou just don't care that you're
willing to say anything in anyway because, well, you know truth.
(01:00:07):
Mm. How many of us have heardthat on the street corners?
Describe, you know, disguised as church?
As you're judging and screaming atpeople gonna hell sinner, you're wicked.
Well, what are you,
(01:00:28):
because you were bound for hell.
You are a sinner.
You are wicked because I am,and everybody else in here is.
Jesus didn't gain followers becausehe stood on a corner and made sure
people knew how horrible they were.
(01:00:49):
Ugh.
Ugh.
He didn't do that.
The followers came because he did exactlythe opposite and it was so unexpected.
Yeah.
I know how horrible your life is.
I know the choices you made.
I love you so much.
(01:01:09):
I love you.
You are my brothers and sistersadopted into the family.
Your importance is above the angels.
You know that angel army,
those fierce warriors, they'renot above you, they're below you.
They're your protection.
(01:01:31):
It's where the warfare happens,but we are loved so much that we
are elevated above the angels.
It's hard for me to wrap my headaround because I know myself,
but when we remember that,what do you think happens here?
(01:01:53):
How does anything happen if somebodydoesn't stand up to make it happen?
I'm gonna challenge you.
If you get the opportunityto stand up for good, do it.
Do it.
That's why I can't wait to besitting next to you at that table.
(01:02:16):
I'm gonna be a voice for loveand a voice for support 'cause
that's what I'm called to be.
If you wanna be angry atme and hate me, feel free.
If you wanna talk to me aboutit, let's have a conversation.
I'll gladly have it.
I'm not afraid of those.
Don't be afraid to make somenoise on the side of good and
(01:02:39):
right, because we need that.
We become drowned out by this loud,angry, cancel you, and it puts us in this
place of fear and we're too afraid tosay something and we become quiet and it
starts making that which is bad or evil orwrong, sound like it's so much bigger and
(01:03:03):
stronger than it is because it's so loud.
It is not bigger and stronger.
It's just loud,
and I don't have to sit downin the face of it and I won't.
I'm trying very hard to be braverbecause I want to be on the side of
(01:03:25):
doing the right thing, even when itflies in the face of what is the norm.
Even as I'm finding out, it flies in theface of what a lot of corporate church
even teaches because I'm telling you,I get a lot of pushback, but I don't
(01:03:49):
mind that because it keeps me sharp.
I have to know what I believeand I have to know the reason
why, and I want that for you.
So be brave.
I know most of you, and I'm gettingto know most of you pretty well.
Be brave.
(01:04:10):
Because you are incredible and you'reamazing because I know what your
hearts are capable of, and I know theleadership that you have, and I know
the fights that you've overcome andthe journeys that you've traveled.
I know that you know what is right,and I know that you know what is wrong.
I know you do because you talk about it.
(01:04:32):
Don't be afraid to stand up for that.
Don't be afraid guys to standup and show guys coming through.
It's like, you know what?
We made choices in addictionthat we're not making today.
I'm gonna show you.
This is what it looks liketo step up and be a dad.
Get those kids back in your lifebecause I know you two are loving it.
(01:04:53):
I know you are.
I love seeing you with your kids.
Mm-hmm.
I love it.
Amen.
Stand up and say, you know what guys?
Don't give up that time with your kids.
Oh, they're making it hard for you.
I know it's hard.
It sucks, but you know what?
Be there anyways.
(01:05:14):
Stand up and be that.
Show them even when it's hard and they'remaking you jump through the hoop, you
know, the jumping hurdles and throughthe hoops and red tape, all this stuff.
Walk with people throughthat and say it's worth it.
Mm-hmm.
Because we are men who stand upand say, I am here to be a man and
(01:05:36):
a dad and a parent, my children.
And if you're in relationshipwith somebody who has kids, be
willing to do that for them.
Also.
Don't treat them different.
Don't treat them like they're lessthan and don't ever treat them like
they are a nuisance or a waste of yourtime or money because their children,
(01:05:59):
they didn't ask for this position.
They didn't ask to get put in it.
So be men
and women and people who aren'tafraid to stand on the side of, right.
I know there's a lot of people thatwould be standing with you here.
(01:06:22):
I'm pretty fortunate that I wouldn'tlikely be standing alone, but I would love
this community to be known for the wayit just simply shows love and support.
It's real easy to be negative.
It's real easy to be angry.
(01:06:42):
It's easy to talk about thingsthat are unfair, and I hear you.
There are things that are unfair.
Yes, there are things thataren't being done right.
You're right.
Living situations that really suck.
You are right.
Things should be better in this community.
Absolutely.
(01:07:04):
I agree with you.
You are welcome to talk with me about it,but I'm saying at the end of the day, we
still have to be a people that can seeGod has you exactly where he wants you.
Mm-hmm.
So why does he want you there?
Why does he want me here?
(01:07:25):
And why did he allow most of mykids to be removed from my life?
At this point, I'm in my lesson.
I could choose to be bitter andangry every day, and some days
it gets the best of me and I am,
(01:07:48):
but I'm figuring out how to leavethat my bitter and angry didn't change
anything but make it worse for me.
I became a bitter, angry human being andthings just got worse and worse and worse.
Negativity is the worst.
(01:08:09):
Tiny little bit of yeastyour life can contain.
That tiny seed of negativity leftin your life will grow and spread
and affect and color everything.
It's just the power of it.
It does that in mine.
That was that, that depression, I justgot through few weeks of, it was horrible.
(01:08:34):
It was negativity.
Mm-hmm.
Negativity.
Got in there with a little bitof anger of over some unfairness.
Took me down.
Mm-hmm.
Took me down.
Because I wanted to feed it for a whilebecause it's easy to slip back to the old
(01:08:55):
habits, it's far easier for me to justgo with what I know, instead of calling
myself out and saying, who is Heidi today?
And Heidi today has a very specificway she wants to live her life.
(01:09:17):
I knew, I know who I am morally.
I know who I am spiritually,and I know the character
traits that I want in my life.
Bitterness and anger has no place in them.
It doesn't fix it anyways, so I haveto work on letting it go anyways.
(01:09:46):
Take opportunities through this week,even if it's in small ways, whether
it's at home in the way you interactwith the people there, or if you
have opportunity outside of there.
If you get the opportunity to be a voice,to stand in defense of somebody that needs
defending or a voice for good, try it.
(01:10:06):
Just practice it.
Practice it small.
It's sometimes hard to do the bigstuff right away, but just try it.
Challenge yourself.
I so fully believe, and it gets meexcited that there are gonna be ripples
coming out of Fenwick that are gonna haveprofound effects on so many people and
(01:10:30):
on so many families and on a small townand a community, and a county and a state
that will continue for years to come.
Because when you changed yourlife, you changed the ripples.
And it's just simply myhope to keep that going.
(01:10:52):
It's why we want it to bebigger, not because of money, not
because of recognition, but wow.
What a legacy for all of you toleave that it started with you.
Fenwick, meth capital of Montco Countyor Fenwick Man, people are really
(01:11:13):
nice there and they sure love you.
That one sounds a lot betterto me than meth capital.
Let's take that, get that outof the way so it can start right
here and it can start right herewith you, right where you're at.
(01:11:34):
You don't have to be a biggerfish in a bigger pond, in a
different job, in a different home.
Years down the road, you can be exactlywhere you're at in your recovery right
now, today to have an amazing impact.
And you're not alone.
(01:11:59):
Don't underestimate yourself.
Let's see, what kind ofthings can happen here?
got the shirt on.
I got this shirt at the Holocaust Museum.
It was when I finished that that ithit me so fully What I wanted to talk
about today, what we do truly matters.
(00:22):
I had the privilege of walkingthrough that museum, which was
gut wrenchingly difficult to do.
To see what humanity does to humanityis horrendous To see when you're
looking at video and photos of realthings that happened, when you see
bodies just stacked up like bales ofhay, just waiting to get it, it's.
(00:47):
If that doesn't do somethingto you, I pray for you.
But just prior to that, we had gone tosee the Lincoln Memorial, and I remember
standing in that place and I read everyinscription engraved into that granite.
And then we went to the MartinLuther King Jr. Memorial.
And again, I walked around and Itook in all the engravings on all
(01:10):
the stone around there and I satand I started thinking about it.
And it struck me that we so often ashuman beings think that how much of an
effect does my life have on the world?
It doesn't affect much.
It's just me.
I'm just one person.
(01:31):
But I started thinking, and I don'tthink Abraham Lincoln and Martin
Luther King, Jr. I don't think whenthey were little that they ever
envisioned that they were gonna be ona monument for all to see, for history.
I don't think that they realizedthat choices and decisions they were
gonna make, were gonna cause them tobe forever remembered as heroes for
(01:56):
fighting for true noble worthy causes.
For daring to stand up and say, this isnot okay, and doing something about it.
I'm sure that they had momentswhere they're like, I'm one person.
I'm just one person here in this world.
But then they did it, and then Istarted thinking through history
(02:19):
and over and over and over and over.
We have examples of people thatchose to be brave in moments
when so many others didn't.
And there's such beauty in thatbecause it's terrifying to be a lone
voice standing up there and facing it.
(02:40):
So I sat with that at the beginningof my trip all the way through
until today, and it didn't change.
I know I often come in here and say,I knew exactly what I was gonna say,
and then God's like, no, you don't.
But this one hasn't ever changed.
It's just been building andbuilding and building, and building.
(03:00):
I'm just so sure of it because Ithink a lot of us sitting here don't
realize how much of an impact ourlives make on this world around us.
Every single one of you does, even if youthink you don't, the one in sitting in
here that thinks they're the smallest,least important person in this world, I'm
telling you, your lives makes ripples thatjust spread and you don't even realize.
(03:23):
And that's what I wanna talk about today.
What you do matters.
We're gonna read today from Romansfive 18 through 19, and the more I
said about this, I'm probably gonnakinda run through most of the little
slides that I have up here right away.
And then I just wanna talk aboutthis and we'll see where it goes.
(03:47):
So here it is again.
We take this from the message, soit's gonna sound differently than
if you're used to King James or NIV.
This is the message version.
So here it is in a nutshell, just as oneperson did it wrong and got us in all this
trouble with sin and death, that beingAdam, another person did it right and got
(04:10):
us out of it, but more than just gettingus out of trouble, he got us into life.
Of course, we're talking about Jesus.
One man, Adam said no to God andput many people in the wrong.
But one man, Jesus said yes to God.
And put many in the right.
(04:34):
We can read in the Bible andwe have so many examples.
We have Adam, we have Moses.
Moses who's like, Ican't lead these people.
I, I have a stutter.
I can't do this.
I'm just one person tried to run away.
But no, it came down to Moses.
I'm sure he didn't grow up in the palacethinking he was gonna be a great leader
(04:56):
of the Israelites out of Egypt on a 40year journey and forever talked about
when it comes to the faith, Abraham,Daniel, Esther Rahab, not even an
Israelite, and she was a prostitute,
but she's listed in the line,the family line of Jesus now
(05:21):
because of what she chose to do.
John the Baptist.
Mary and Joseph, you wanna talk about twopeople that decided to do the right thing,
Joseph, and that culture would've walkedaway from her and Mary faced stoning.
That's what typically happened in those,but they chose to do things different.
(05:42):
Mary Magdalene didn't have a greatreputation, but she was the first
at the tomb, the first to worship,the first to just believe, I believe
you, Jesus, the woman at the well.
Do you know how many peoplewere converts because of her?
I think we gloss over that because we gettoo concerned to make sure people know
(06:04):
how horrible she was at vile Wicked woman.
You know, I have opinions on thattoo, and what likely put her in that
position, but why do we gloss over whathappened after she was so excited to
run back to town and because of her?
Her, that woman that we've chose totrash over and over and over in so
(06:25):
many churches on Sunday, literallyhad over 3000 people believing by the
time somebody came back and visited.
That's a big deal.
That is a huge deal becauseof her excitement to share
what Jesus did in her life.
Then we have today's examples.
(06:48):
Rosa Parks.
We know about Fred Rogers.
Interesting one to put on here,but look what he's done for this
nation and what he's brought.
He's saw that we need some gentlenessin love and kindness in community.
So he started with the children.
If we could get the childrenraised like this and we talk,
we'll talk about him forever.
(07:09):
Mr. Rogers.
Gentle.
Mr. Rogers.
Harriet Tubman.
Malala.
You Zi.
If you don't, sorry, Ibutchered her last name.
If you don't know her.
I mean, she was a Middle Easternwoman that was, they attempted to
burn her alive and she survived it.
And, um, because she wanted aneducation as a woman, Florence
(07:31):
Nightingale, I love what she did.
She allowed me to be aparamedic and revolutionize
medicine and how we treat it.
She believed in something, tooka stand, stood up to men, and
she changed how we do that.
Abraham Lincoln, we alreadyknow Mother Theresa.
What a wonderful example of just, I'mone woman and all I wanna do is just
(07:54):
love people in the streets and look atthe impact in how we talk about her.
Martin Luther King, Jr. Nelson Mandela,
those were all people that had a vision,an idea, a belief, and a thought.
And they stood up and bravelysaid, I'm gonna live this way,
(08:14):
even when it's swimming upstream.
I'm willing to stand there anddo what most people aren't doing.
In Galatians five verse nine, it says, itonly takes a minute amount of yeast, you
know, to permeate an entire loaf of bread.
(08:35):
And they're like, well, there's Heidi.
The baker talking about baking bread.
Well, there's a reason for that.
A, I love to make bread, but it's moreabout this minute amount of yeast.
It's an analogy.
It takes one bad apple toboil the whole bunch, right?
A little bit of rot doesn't stay, alittle bit of rot, a little bit of bad can
(09:02):
become great bad if it's not controlled.
It's why when people remain silent, whenevil starts to get loud and I'm just not
gonna get involved, that's not my thing.
That's too far away.
What happens?
I think the Jews showed us
(09:24):
what happened to them,how many millions of them
paid with their life because A, my noonamount of yeast called Adolf Hitler
knew how to talk to people.
There's no denying that that manknew how to talk and speak and lead.
(09:49):
That's not me saying he was a great man.
He was a great man for evil, but thatman knew how to lead because people
listened to him when he talked.
I sit and think, you know, it's realeasy appear to say, oh, but if that was
happening now and I was in that country,there is no way I'd go along with it.
(10:13):
Really?
Do you think all the people in Germany,if they would've been told 20 years
earlier, you are all gonna sit andsilently follow this person and you're
gonna allow millions of people to beslaughtered brutally simply because
they were born Jewish and they, I'msure would say there is no way I
(10:35):
would never do that, but it happened.
Right?
Why?
How did that happen?
But it didn't just happen then.
'cause I think, do you even know howmany people are in slavery today?
Mm-hmm.
All over the world.
(10:55):
Like hundreds of millions of people.
Do you know that the United Statesalone, they know for a fact that there
are over a million people in slavery.
That includes
selling of self, children, traffickingover a million people in our country
(11:17):
alone, and we rank way lower than manyother that have millions upon millions
upon millions of people enslaved.
But we're over here and life is great.
I'm in the United States.
I am free, but in my freecountry, there are slaves.
(11:42):
I don't know what to do about that.
I don't.
I can speak about it.
I will be aware of it.
I will never support it.
But then it spreads and it getsbigger because it starts to call into
question, well, what do you do then?
Because you know, I had this wholething like, and again, I'm just
(12:05):
going to use this as an exampleand pro, I promise you, I have no
issue with you wearing Nike shoes.
I don't because I justgot some yesterday myself.
But I have to remember and somehowfigure out what do I do with the
knowledge that the Uyghurs in China arean enslaved population that is being
brutalized, sterilized their childrentaken away and slaughtered and used
(12:28):
as free slave labor to make them.
My desire for stuff comesat the cost of humanity.
My desire for all that cheap stuff that Iwant, that we have, so much of it comes on
the back of human beings that are slaves.
(12:54):
And that's hard to imagine becauseit doesn't personally come into my
space over here in the United States.
But I can look around my house and Isee all the things that very likely were
produced by slaves, many of them children.
So who of you here has kids or grandkids?
(13:17):
Which one of 'em do you wannabe slave labor making shoes for
rich people in other countries?
Which one would you pick andsay, well, that one can do it.
My family might havepicked me, but that's okay.
So, um, those are hard things though.
Those are really hard things.
'cause what do you do?
What do you do when something is this big?
(13:39):
Like the economy of the world nowhas become dependent on slave labor.
The numbers I was looking at, do youknow how many slaves are in India?
Over 11 million.
11 million.
(14:02):
There's almost 9 million inChina, over a million here
Africa, tens of millions, like we'retalking slaves, like real life slaves.
And it all started as thatminute amount of yeast.
(14:24):
It all started with somebody saying, Iwant power and I'm gonna take it by force,
and I wanna make more money and I wannaget richer, and I know how to do it.
I'm gonna do it on the backsof people I don't like.
I'm gonna wipe 'em out, eliminate it.
We've got wars going on all over tryingto eliminate populations and peoples.
(14:50):
And it's horrible.
The Bible talks aboutpeople like this too.
It started with Kaan first murder.
He brought murder into this world.
There's Jezebel, Judas Acat, a Bialek,Herod, Pharaoh, Haman, Delilah.
Oh, because of Satan.
(15:12):
The original, the evil doneby them is astonishing.
And then we get this, just a few.
This isn't even really that modern AdolfHitler, Joseph Stalin, Pulpo Leopold,
Saddam Hussein be Mussolini Heinrich heel
(15:40):
evil
done to people, to humanity.
Do you know how many deaths arerepresented by just these names?
And this is just the tip of the iceberg.
Do you know how manypeople were slaughtered?
(16:02):
Because they all started out as littlebit of yeast had an idea and somehow
it was implemented.
Proverbs 29, verse 25 saysthis, the fear of human opinion
(16:24):
disables, but trusting in God.
It protects you from that.
Lemme see what I got,
which brings it all to this.
The power.
Of one.
(16:45):
I talked earlier about theripples that our lives have.
Every single one of us, ourlives affects other people.
I know a lot of times in my past I'mlike, I can choose to do what I want.
'cause it doesn't hurt anybody else.
It doesn't affect anybody else.
And I'm sorry.
It does though.
If you are living, breathinghuman beings in this world,
everything you do has a ripple.
(17:06):
Whether it's just a very small one or ifit goes on and on and on and on, because
what you do affects another person.
But then whose lives doall of those people affect?
And then whose do they affectand then whose do they affect?
It's not all about us.
(17:28):
That's why being self-centered,prideful, arrogant, egotistical,
it's why it's so dangerous.
It is why the worst of theworst starts happening when it
comes all the way down to self.
It's me, me, me, me, all about me.
We're human beings and we're all about me.
(17:50):
Kind of people like we wanna be something,we wanna be recognized, we wanna be
noticed, we want the pat on the back.
We wanna be recognizedwhen we've done something,
but do we stop to realize the effect thatwe have even in our day to day choices?
(18:14):
You know, I think of Father's Dayand I think of the effect that
fathers have in the house and onchildren, and it's a profound one.
A lot of us here are in recovery and we'vehad experiences that probably haven't
brought the best ripples into our home.
(18:34):
And those ripples spilled over onto thosethat we loved the most, which then spilled
onto others who loved them and on and on.
It wasn't our intent, but when we touchthe surface, there's no helping it.
It happens.
(18:56):
This isn't a guilt or ashamed anybody.
It's just it is what it is.
I can say that as a mom,my ripples hurt my kids.
My choices hurt my children, and thenmy children and their interactions.
There was a fallout and it spilledout from there and on and on and on.
(19:19):
I think it's why the Bible talksabout the iniquity or the sin of the
father from generation to generation.
Think of it as ripples, the resultsof choices that you've made.
You know, I'm watching that in my family.
My family is a, it's a hot mess.
Doesn't look at it, it doesn't lookanything at all, like what the Bible
(19:41):
might say a family should look like.
You know, the whole thing.
It doesn't, it's broken, shattered,there's, there's hate and there's love,
and there's separation and shunning andthere's all this stuff and it's awful.
(20:01):
Those are all ripples of people makingthe choices that they've made in life.
I think of those dads, or
we'll just say men or women whomay have stepped up to be a parent
(20:23):
in the life of a child that isn't.
Their natural born child.
Do you think there's not power in that?
Don't let it be lost on you.
What a beautiful thing it is to stepinto the life of a child and fill a void
and step up and be that person in thatchild's life when you didn't have to.
(20:51):
I'm very thankful
that my children have a good man to haveaccess to in their life, who genuinely
cares about them, who doesn't resent them?
Because I see that a lot.
We get in these relationships, you know,and then we can bring kids into it.
(21:12):
Well, yeah, we're reallyinto them, but not the kids.
Well, I'm sorry.
You don't get to choose that.
You do not get to choose that,and if you ever try to make
somebody choose shame on you.
Mm-hmm.
Don't ever make somebodychoose you over their children.
I've been asked to do that.
(21:35):
Make me more important than your kids.
I matter more than your kids do.
Hmm.
I know that biblically speaking, thatrelationship in the home, that has to
be the primary one and then the kids,but it's not at the expense of kids.
Don't get that wrong.
(21:55):
The reason this becomes primaryis so the kids get the best.
This primary relationship athome will never tell you to make
your kids less important ever.
Don't resent them.
If you want a relationship withtheir parent, build a relationship
(22:17):
with their children too.
And just a little FYI for you guys.
There's nothing that warms a motherheart more than to see her children
well loved by people and cared about.
I love to watch this community ofmen here, the way they come around
each other, the way they come around,the other men in this group, the way
(22:40):
they come around, the younger guys.
I love that.
I'm gonna ask you to continue to do that.
And in fact, I'm gonna challengeyou to do more of that.
Like to stand up and be men,like good ones, showing others.
This is what real men do.
Women have to do the same.
I'm not excluding you,it's just Father's Day.
(23:01):
So I'm trying to, youknow, like work that in.
So there I did that, but I'mjust gonna go to all of us.
Let's all stand up and focus on being.
Those examples that say, even though mostpeople do it this way, I'm not going to,
(23:36):
the power that is in us toaffect the lives around us is
far greater than we realize.
And that's the danger in it becausewe often don't stop to think about it.
That really bad, awful day you'rehaving where you lash out at somebody
who has nothing to do with anythingat all that's going on in your life.
Like me, with that poor girl atthe lemonade stand, that didn't
(23:58):
put enough lemon in my drink.
I wasn't upset with her, she didn'tdo anything wrong, and yet me being
me, this is a little frustrated'cause I had to wait in line.
Well, of course it's a huge busy fare.
What do you expect?
You're gonna wait in line.
I just didn't feel likewaiting in line that day.
(24:21):
That has ripple effects.
You know, I walk up there and justkind of, I wasn't outright rude.
It was like the passive aggressive,rude, where it's like, oh, is it?
You know?
And I'm so embarrassed about that.
Oh, I did clean that up.
I did share with that.
I went and found herand I apologized to her.
(24:42):
But
it matters greatly how weinteract with people around us.
I don't know what my behavingthat way did to her in her day.
I don't know what she was going through.
And then I had to add to it really?
Really?
Because did I wannachange places with her?
(25:02):
Heck no.
I don't wanna squeeze lemonsand batter hand batter corn dogs
all day long in a little trailerfor a bunch of people at a fair.
I don't want that job.
So why wasn't I grateful that shewas willing to do that for me?
I could have made her day so good.
Mm-hmm.
(25:22):
But instead I approached that andI was that little bit of yeast.
I could almost cry thinking about that.
'cause I don't wannabe that in this world.
I had chosen that moment to behavemore like a little bit of yeast
instead of being a little bit of love,or better yet a whole lot of love.
(25:52):
Think about your actions.
Think about a more thanjust this present time.
Think about it more thanjust the here and now.
Yeah.
I'm in a really bad new mood and I, ugh.
Just had to get off my chest andjust say, yeah, now I feel better.
Well, that's great for you or for me, butwhat about the one that we dumped that on?
(26:19):
What happened to the ripples from there?
Where did that fall out on?
I think that's why the Bible overand over and over and over, talks
about serving and loving each other.
(26:42):
I don't find in the Bible whereit says it's all about self first.
You first make sure you're first in line.
Make sure you get the biggest portion.
Make sure when you go througha buffet line, you've got both
plates filled to overflowing,even though it's a packed house.
And some people at the end won't get some.
(27:03):
Well, they should have been in line first.
I know some people havehad those thoughts.
At least I'm hoping because Iused to kind of like think, you
know, hurry up and get in there.
'cause that looks real good.
Well, it probably looks good toeverybody, so maybe if I took a
little bit, everybody can get some.
Mm-hmm.
Because that whole me first thing,that's the worst kind of yeast.
(27:32):
Jesus very clearly spoke about that.
The ones who want to be firstand greatest and best, where
you're gonna end up is last.
You're gonna be back of the line,get back there with your fine self.
(27:53):
But the ones that serve, the onesthat aren't looking for the limelight,
the ones that aren't trying to bethe big deal on the playground.
King of the hill, greatest ofthe great, the richest, the
most accomplished, the most.
Fill in the blank.
(28:16):
The ones who instead chooseto serve and to love everybody
they come in contact with.
Those are the ones that changed the world.
I don't think it was hate that causedAbraham Lincoln to make a decision
that I'm sure tore him apart.
(28:38):
I am sure that when you becomepresident of a country, the last thing
you wanna do is declare a war thatyou know is gonna rip it in half.
It is just one issue though.
Maybe let's just keep the country unitedand maybe, we'll, just through talking
about it and stuff, it'll get better.
(29:00):
Again, it's slavery, thebuying and selling of people.
To be treated worse than animals.
And Abraham Lincoln said,
I have to fight this.
I'm pretty certain hedidn't get a lot of love.
(29:21):
Some people did, but he caused alot of ripples and the damage and
death because of his decision.
I'm sure haunted him.
But he still stood up andsaid Slavery is wrong.
And then Martin Luther King,think of the time he was in.
(29:45):
My family's fairly racist,
not even fairly.
That's how I was raised.
I can only imagine what he was up against.
I can only imagine what he heardbecause God in his wisdom and love.
Said, I want Martin Luther KingJr. To be born African American
(30:10):
with dark skin and black Afro hair.
I'm gonna give him this amazingmind and I'm gonna give him courage.
And he became a voice and he died for it
because wrong is wrong.
(30:31):
If 99 people out of a hundredsay this is okay, and we continue
to do it, but it's wrong.
I pray that there's one personthat'll say, but I can't.
Even when it's standing up to 99,
it is so important to take that timeand choose carefully how you interact
(30:56):
with people, how you're gonna live yourlife, how you're gonna portray yourself.
In those of you in this recoverycommunity, the power you have to impact
people coming along behind you andshowing them the way people come in
(31:18):
here and the first thing you do isn'tpoint out, oh, I remember you from
before when you did this, or, I don'tthink you should be here, or I don't
trust you, or whatever it may be.
You meet them exactly where they're at,and then you show them a way forward
that looks completely different thanwhat was, you don't meet people and
(31:38):
live with them like it was the past.
You're like, this is here and now, andthis is who I am, and you're living this
life out loud and you're standing upand you're talking about it out loud.
I am so thankful that in this littlearea, we don't talk about recovery
and silence during these little hushedvoices and little closed off rooms.
(32:01):
We're not ashamed of our recovery here.
Being sober isn't something to
being a former drunk isn'tsomething that I have shame about.
I will gladly tell you about itbecause I love telling you about now.
Yeah.
(32:21):
Being an addict isn't a shameful thingbecause you get to tell them about, now,
it can be a challenge though
to not get lured back by the peoplearound you, family, old friends,
(32:51):
just this perceived idea, but,oh yeah, this is what I have to.
Give off though.
I'm this person.
It's not me, but this is the,I just, this is, this is that.
This is me now.
This is that.
Look, I gotta be like this.
Just simply be you.
(33:12):
If you feel a passion for something,for have the courage to step into that.
If you see something isn't right,
have the courage to standup and say This isn't right.
(33:34):
It is scary stuff.
'cause I've had to do alittle bit of that lately.
Um, my position and my thoughtprocesses have changed quite a
bit on how I see certain things.
I. And I found myself in conversationswith people that intentionally have put
me there because they want to nail medown on something and call me out on it.
(33:59):
So I better be realsure of what I stand on.
I have to be,
um,
standing up for right isn't alwaysgonna be the easiest thing to do.
And most of the time sayingnothing is so much easier.
(34:21):
I'm not gonna say anything,
doesn't mean that I agree withthem, but you know, I'm not
gonna say anything about it.
You are not saying something is ripplesbecause who is gonna say something who.
(34:43):
If you won't, and you know somethingis very wrong and you won't
say something, are you waitingfor somebody else to, and why?
How big does something have to getbefore we're willing to then stand up?
Or are we waiting for other people?
(35:03):
So we're not the only one?
Because sometimes we are calledto be the only one because maybe
those people were waiting for youto get up there and say something.
Maybe God put that on you tostand up there and say no,
(35:25):
to stand up to it, to defend.
We're called to do that.
The poor, the oppressed, thehelpless, the afflicted, the
imprisoned, the slaves, the orphans.
The hurting the widow.
We're told we're supposed to do that.
(35:45):
Do we?
I, I always thought thatwhy I do those things.
No, I didn't.
I might've said words in thesafe circles to say them, but
did I openly stand up for them?
(36:08):
Usually not.
Usually not.
Um,
examples, I'll give you an examplethat I have going on currently.
I have had pushback and questioningbecause I am going to have a table
(36:29):
and represent I. At a pride eventat the end of this month, offering
the services that we provide here topeople in that community that have
a need for sobriety and recovery.
And I can tell you, I have notheard positive feedback about it.
I have had people asking me, whywould you do that and put your
(36:52):
organization's reputation on the line?
I said, I'm doing it because I'mcalled by Jesus to love everybody.
I'm called by Jesus to lovepeople exactly where they're at.
And if I'm not willing to do that,how will they ever know Jesus?
Because at the end of the day, Idon't care about anything other
than can I tell you about Jesus?
(37:13):
If you wanna know abouthim because he loves you,
and if you have a battle witha substance use, we are here to
help you because I don't wantanybody left to live in that hell.
I am called to be a light inthis world everywhere I go,
(37:39):
so I can promise you I will never be ata protest against a pride event ever.
I will likely not be at a protestbecause I find it difficult to
love somebody when I'm protesting.
(38:06):
I would never have represented myselfin an organization at a Pride event
before because I would've let otherpeople's opinions override my own in
the fear that somebody might thinknegatively about outreach 4 1 9.
(38:27):
And you know what?
If you're gonna have a problem withme or this place because I am bringing
service information to an event,
so be it.
'cause I'm gonna be therebecause I will be there gladly.
(38:53):
Because I have found absolutefreedom in my call to love.
It was so freeing to shed the thoughtthat I needed to judge somebody and
make sure they knew my judgments.
(39:15):
And then God's like, so glad you goteverything right in your life, kid.
I'm sure glad you got it all figured out.
'cause I needed help to judge people.
I feel such shame over pastthoughts and ideas and opinions.
(39:39):
But then I let that go because again,I was raised in an environment.
Kids learn what they learn.
That's why I'll go back to parents,the ripple effects you have.
If you have a household ledwith love, what will come out of
there will be goodness that willcontinue far beyond your life.
(40:06):
But when you plant seeds of hateor non-acceptance or exclusion
or love, everybody accept, whatdo those little seeds become?
It's that yeast.
Tell me when planting a seed of hateever resulted in a crop of good.
(40:29):
If you think of all those thingsas seeds, what's gonna come out of
it when you water it and grow it?
Because that little bit of hatewhat happens when it's multiplied.
But the same thing happenswith the good and love
(40:51):
we have the perfect example in Jesus.
We often forget too,
that Jesus was radical.
I think a lot of people todayin organized religion would
have an issue with Jesus too.
If he showed up and operated the wayhe did then because he didn't operate
(41:14):
the way people thought he should.
You wanna talk about ripples?
His, the ripples he leftwere like shockwaves.
He turned everything upside downbecause he took the rules and the law
out of it and said, lead with love.
(41:35):
Because when you lead with love, youdon't need a bunch of rules and laws to
tell you that what you're doing is wrong.
You don't murder peoplewhen you're loving them.
You don't steal from peoplewhen you're loving them.
You're not cheating and hatingand deceiving and full of envy
(42:00):
when you are busy loving people.
Jesus was radical.
He loved when peoplewould expect him to hate.
His anger was towards the peopleyou would've thought were the ruling
(42:22):
leaders of the religious law inchurch, and that's when he got upset.
But the people he hung out with
were us.
(42:45):
The people he would've gone to findwere the people that are rejected.
So think about the groups that todayare rejected, who suffer, who are on
the receiving end of hate and rejection.
We're called to the same thing.
(43:12):
I was so profoundly affected in Washingtonafter getting outta that Holocaust museum.
I had had two beautiful examplesof men who chose to just love
and stand up to awfulness.
Both of them died for it.
Both of them sacrificed theirlife for it, both of them.
(43:36):
That doesn't sound like a fun outcome tostand up to evil and get killed for it.
Although for me, the way I believethe good stuff just begins then.
I'm not afraid to die.
I don't want to, but I'm not afraid to.
(43:57):
Two men saw things were so wrong andthey're like, I'll do something about it.
Do you think either one thought they.
Would start something asbig as what it became?
I don't think so.
But that other example of Hitler asI went through the Holocaust museum,
(44:19):
'cause it's like I felt so good.
Like, it's like it was amazingwhat these two men did.
Like, you know, bringingfreedom to slaves and
equal rights.
You know, racism is just so wrong.
And both of them champions for that.
And that was amazing.
And then I stood face to face withHitler and I couldn't shake the
(44:44):
feeling of, I'm looking at whathappens when good people stay silent.
And we see a lot ofthat in the world today.
There are a lot of reallygood people staying silent.
They're not saying anything.
Nah, it is what it is.
(45:05):
It's over there.
What am I gonna do about it?
It's on the other side of the country.
It's in another country,it's in a different county
or it's in a different city.
Or it's
are you even bringing it to God?
(45:26):
Thank God I don't know what I can do,but I know that you can change this
if you hear somebody talking aboutit or if they talk about it with you.
Do you stand up then for people?
I know that it hasn't been real popularthe couple times and I don't do it
anymore, but couple times when I'vementioned it's like, do you know where all
(45:49):
our cheap Chinese goods are coming from?
Do you know who's making those?
You know, we've got, sheen is sopopular 'cause they're so cheap.
It's, it's really cheap on my pocketbook.
But the cost of making, it wasn't
(46:13):
my desire to have that meantlooking somebody in the eye.
'cause it's no different.
And saying, I don't care about your life.
I don't care that you're a slave.
I don't care that you don't get paid.
I don't care that yourchildren were taken from you.
I don't care that you were forciblysterilized and I don't care that
you guys are being killed off.
(46:33):
Just make more of that cheapgarbage so I can buy it for cheap.
And it doesn't sit well sometimes.
And then it's the old, oh, but it's justso expensive to buy, you know, something
made in America A do I really need it?
Do we really need more cheap stuffbecause it's just super cute and we got
(47:00):
it for, you know, $6 instead of 1999.
And I am not saying this to guilt anybodybecause this is a struggle that I have.
Mm-hmm.
At what point do I say, you know what?
I have to take a hard stand evenif it doesn't make a difference,
(47:24):
do I say to the best of my ability,I, I, no, because my having this
isn't worth somebody's freedom.
We're so fortunate here, likeour minds I don't think can
grasp the idea of being a slave.
We can't grasp, some of ushave been in jail and prison.
(47:47):
I know I'm married to one,and I know many of us here,
we even in their head, more freedomsthan modern day slaves have.
(48:09):
If we are people who say we are childrenof God, followers of Jesus, that means
we have to be people that are willingto follow through on what that means.
Even when it's hard and when it'sunpopular, you may have to stand
up to your friends, your family.
(48:32):
You may get laughedat, you may get mocked.
Well, last I knew, getting laughedat and mocked and never hurt anybody.
You might not like it, butit's not gonna kill you.
I can handle it because I knowthe reason for what I believe.
If you wanna laugh at me or mock meor ridicule me because of standing
(48:57):
up for something that I believeshould be stood up for, go ahead.
It gets a little harder on thoseissues that could put you in a position
where you could be killed for it.
Are we people that arewilling to do that too?
Are we?
(49:17):
Well, I don't really believe this.
This isn't how I think, but I'm gonna sayit 'cause I don't wanna get hurt and I get
that self preservation's a strong thing.
But is it the right thing all the time.
I wish life was black and white.
(49:38):
I really do.
I wish there wasn't so much gray in lifethat we had to navigate and get through.
But even as I say that, good and evil,that's a pretty black and white issue.
(49:58):
Something that's good.
Can't be evil and somethingthat's evil can't be good.
That makes that a black and white issue.
It's humans that have put allkinds of gray on it though
because it's more comfortable.
(50:23):
There is power in one.
We've got all kinds of examples of it,but we've got the ultimate example.
Jesus,
one person was the downfallof the entire world.
One, and guess what?
It wasn't Eve, it wasAdam says So in the Bible,
(50:47):
it's Adam held responsible forthe downfall, which meant that
humanity had to pay for it.
And he showed up as Jesus.
Two examples, one of bad and oneof good, but it shows you what
(51:10):
happens through one individual.
I believe there's people in here that aregonna be people that are gonna make some
really big ripples, and that's amazing.
I can't wait to see it.
But do you know what I love even moreis that all of us here are capable of
(51:31):
doing those gentle, quiet ripples underthe surface of kindness and goodness
and love and support and acceptance.
'cause how does it feel when you getthat from people who here hates to
be loved and cared for and supported?
Who hates it?
(51:51):
Who doesn't want any of it?
I'm so glad I didn't see a hand goup 'cause I was gonna chastise you.
Not really thought about it.
I'll call you liars.
I'll call you liars.
We can handle it here.
We'll laugh about it.
So if it feels that good to receive it,why aren't you somebody that gives that?
(52:18):
It's very easy to be a jerk tosomebody who's a jerk to you.
And guess what?
Now you got two jerks,
right?
Right.
You started out with one.
Think of that as that yeast.
Ha.
I'm gonna treat you like thisbecause you came at me first.
(52:41):
Can I use you as an example?
Sure.
Okay.
I don't know what the exampleis, so I'm cringing right now.
My husband, who I lovedearly so much, he is my one.
Sometimes his prison shows orhis dry drunk shows when it
(53:05):
feels he is been disrespected
and I can see it happening too.
I'm like, oh no.
His ripples vary depending on the day.
Sometimes he catches it early andother times I might have to be
(53:28):
a husband that I love so much.
Can I talk to you aboutsomething I. Because without
thinking, sometimes we react.
Yep.
Mm-hmm.
And I get it 'cause I do too becausemy husband over there can tell
you all the examples of my drydrunk and there's a lot of them.
'cause I can react too, pull out in frontof me when there's not much traffic.
(53:52):
When you could have waited andOh, you're gonna get dry drunk.
I'm working on it, but it's still there.
I don't know why that won't leave.
I don't know why.
It just, Ooh.
Because it goes from thatimmediately to like, oh great.
Every light in Greenville's gonna bered and it's gonna take me 47 minutes
(54:13):
just to get through downtown Greenville.
This is insane.
It's a little country town.
Not Chicago or Detroit or Washington.
But no, that's just me being drydrunk and having an attitude and
I'm getting better at catching it.
My husband.
(54:33):
Is very good at being teachable,but he's also catching it
and then he takes care of it.
And I love that about him.
When he's done wrong, he, to the bestof his ability, goes to make sure that
that is attended to and taken care of.
(54:53):
So our ripples, it might start outnot that great, but we can take
care of that, and that changes thoseripples going forward from that.
It's not too late.
So don't underestimate the power thatyou have in this world, especially
(55:14):
when you're walking with God,because then it just is not you.
And I'm telling you, it's not justyou because when you said yes to
God, you said yes, I love you Jesus.
I want everything thatyou have given to me.
You are given the spirit who lives in you.
You are not alone.
(55:34):
It is never you against anything.
It's you and the creator of theuniverse walking through life
because there's nothing to win.
It's already been done,
but he called you to bea light in this world.
And that means, especially when thereis darkness and awfulness, that's
(55:57):
especially where you need to shine.
You need to be brave enoughto stand up and say, no Uhuh.
Maybe it's in your family.
Some of us have had tobreak generational curses.
And again, I will say to you, I am sosorry 'cause that price tag is huge.
I'm one of them.
(56:19):
I know the price tag.
Yeah, but do you know what else I foundout there was great honor in God seeing
something and giving something to me thatallowed me to be equipped to do that.
And the same for all of you thathave, you could have said no
(56:43):
and then you would've continuedmore generational curses and
more generational curses.
But you said no, you couldchoose to live just angry all
the time because this isn't fair.
Not how I want it not going my way.
I'm doing it right and I'mstill having to pay the prices.
(57:04):
Did you ever ask, why is Godallowing me these lessons?
It's a different way oflooking at the rough stuff.
And I know it's not easy 'cause Ihave bad day and there's times I, I
don't wanna ask myself that question.
Tired of learning.
But on the other side of it,I'm really glad that I learned.
(57:28):
I'm really glad that I let go of myanger 'cause I was so convinced that
I was justified, but the ripplesI was putting out into the world,
because I was surrounded with anger.
Everybody who came in my orbitknew it in one way or another.
It didn't even come outas anger, but negativity,
(57:52):
that constant negativity, there'susually loneliness, trauma,
bitterness, or anger at the root of it.
None of those feel good andnone of those help you, and it
only hurts those around you.
(58:17):
Pause before you react.
Pause before you think,
but also be bold enough to speak when youshould love people enough to stand up for
the people that need to be stood up for.
(58:38):
I mean, it wasn't a difficult thingfor me to go to Washington, talk to
a bunch of people who most peoplewould think of way out of your league.
I didn't see 'em that way.
I saw all of your faces, and I'mlike, it's the only way I can bring
the whole group in front of 'em.
We're all as a group, we'rein front of this person.
(59:01):
We're talking to you becausewe're looking to make things
better and you're all worth it.
So I don't care who you are, whatyour title is, what your job is,
and I don't care that I'm justHeidi from Fenwick because I'm not.
Just Heidi from Fenwick.
I am Heidi from Fenwick, daughterof the King, his favorite.
(59:27):
And it's not just me.
It's not just me.
I have something to say and I believein what I have to say and I will say it.
And I don't care if some peoplewon't like it or receive it.
At least I'm trying to get to that.
I do.
I hate when I know people don'tlike me, but I'm learning.
(59:47):
Not everybody's gonna like me.
My skin is very thin,but I'm getting there.
But at the same time, I don'twanna completely lose that.
Don't get so thick skin thatyou just don't care that you're
willing to say anything in anyway because, well, you know truth.
(01:00:07):
Mm. How many of us have heardthat on the street corners?
Describe, you know, disguised as church?
As you're judging and screaming atpeople gonna hell sinner, you're wicked.
Well, what are you,
(01:00:28):
because you were bound for hell.
You are a sinner.
You are wicked because I am,and everybody else in here is.
Jesus didn't gain followers becausehe stood on a corner and made sure
people knew how horrible they were.
(01:00:49):
Ugh.
Ugh.
He didn't do that.
The followers came because he did exactlythe opposite and it was so unexpected.
Yeah.
I know how horrible your life is.
I know the choices you made.
I love you so much.
(01:01:09):
I love you.
You are my brothers and sistersadopted into the family.
Your importance is above the angels.
You know that angel army,
those fierce warriors, they'renot above you, they're below you.
They're your protection.
(01:01:31):
It's where the warfare happens,but we are loved so much that we
are elevated above the angels.
It's hard for me to wrap my headaround because I know myself,
but when we remember that,what do you think happens here?
(01:01:53):
How does anything happen if somebodydoesn't stand up to make it happen?
I'm gonna challenge you.
If you get the opportunityto stand up for good, do it.
Do it.
That's why I can't wait to besitting next to you at that table.
(01:02:16):
I'm gonna be a voice for loveand a voice for support 'cause
that's what I'm called to be.
If you wanna be angry atme and hate me, feel free.
If you wanna talk to me aboutit, let's have a conversation.
I'll gladly have it.
I'm not afraid of those.
Don't be afraid to make somenoise on the side of good and
(01:02:39):
right, because we need that.
We become drowned out by this loud,angry, cancel you, and it puts us in this
place of fear and we're too afraid tosay something and we become quiet and it
starts making that which is bad or evil orwrong, sound like it's so much bigger and
(01:03:03):
stronger than it is because it's so loud.
It is not bigger and stronger.
It's just loud,
and I don't have to sit downin the face of it and I won't.
I'm trying very hard to be braverbecause I want to be on the side of
(01:03:25):
doing the right thing, even when itflies in the face of what is the norm.
Even as I'm finding out, it flies in theface of what a lot of corporate church
even teaches because I'm telling you,I get a lot of pushback, but I don't
(01:03:49):
mind that because it keeps me sharp.
I have to know what I believeand I have to know the reason
why, and I want that for you.
So be brave.
I know most of you, and I'm gettingto know most of you pretty well.
Be brave.
(01:04:10):
Because you are incredible and you'reamazing because I know what your
hearts are capable of, and I know theleadership that you have, and I know
the fights that you've overcome andthe journeys that you've traveled.
I know that you know what is right,and I know that you know what is wrong.
I know you do because you talk about it.
(01:04:32):
Don't be afraid to stand up for that.
Don't be afraid guys to standup and show guys coming through.
It's like, you know what?
We made choices in addictionthat we're not making today.
I'm gonna show you.
This is what it looks liketo step up and be a dad.
Get those kids back in your lifebecause I know you two are loving it.
(01:04:53):
I know you are.
I love seeing you with your kids.
Mm-hmm.
I love it.
Amen.
Stand up and say, you know what guys?
Don't give up that time with your kids.
Oh, they're making it hard for you.
I know it's hard.
It sucks, but you know what?
Be there anyways.
(01:05:14):
Stand up and be that.
Show them even when it's hard and they'remaking you jump through the hoop, you
know, the jumping hurdles and throughthe hoops and red tape, all this stuff.
Walk with people throughthat and say it's worth it.
Mm-hmm.
Because we are men who stand upand say, I am here to be a man and
(01:05:36):
a dad and a parent, my children.
And if you're in relationshipwith somebody who has kids, be
willing to do that for them.
Also.
Don't treat them different.
Don't treat them like they're lessthan and don't ever treat them like
they are a nuisance or a waste of yourtime or money because their children,
(01:05:59):
they didn't ask for this position.
They didn't ask to get put in it.
So be men
and women and people who aren'tafraid to stand on the side of, right.
I know there's a lot of people thatwould be standing with you here.
(01:06:22):
I'm pretty fortunate that I wouldn'tlikely be standing alone, but I would love
this community to be known for the wayit just simply shows love and support.
It's real easy to be negative.
It's real easy to be angry.
(01:06:42):
It's easy to talk about thingsthat are unfair, and I hear you.
There are things that are unfair.
Yes, there are things thataren't being done right.
You're right.
Living situations that really suck.
You are right.
Things should be better in this community.
Absolutely.
(01:07:04):
I agree with you.
You are welcome to talk with me about it,but I'm saying at the end of the day, we
still have to be a people that can seeGod has you exactly where he wants you.
Mm-hmm.
So why does he want you there?
Why does he want me here?
(01:07:25):
And why did he allow most of mykids to be removed from my life?
At this point, I'm in my lesson.
I could choose to be bitter andangry every day, and some days
it gets the best of me and I am,
(01:07:48):
but I'm figuring out how to leavethat my bitter and angry didn't change
anything but make it worse for me.
I became a bitter, angry human being andthings just got worse and worse and worse.
Negativity is the worst.
(01:08:09):
Tiny little bit of yeastyour life can contain.
That tiny seed of negativity leftin your life will grow and spread
and affect and color everything.
It's just the power of it.
It does that in mine.
That was that, that depression, I justgot through few weeks of, it was horrible.
(01:08:34):
It was negativity.
Mm-hmm.
Negativity.
Got in there with a little bitof anger of over some unfairness.
Took me down.
Mm-hmm.
Took me down.
Because I wanted to feed it for a whilebecause it's easy to slip back to the old
(01:08:55):
habits, it's far easier for me to justgo with what I know, instead of calling
myself out and saying, who is Heidi today?
And Heidi today has a very specificway she wants to live her life.
(01:09:17):
I knew, I know who I am morally.
I know who I am spiritually,and I know the character
traits that I want in my life.
Bitterness and anger has no place in them.
It doesn't fix it anyways, so I haveto work on letting it go anyways.
(01:09:46):
Take opportunities through this week,even if it's in small ways, whether
it's at home in the way you interactwith the people there, or if you
have opportunity outside of there.
If you get the opportunity to be a voice,to stand in defense of somebody that needs
defending or a voice for good, try it.
(01:10:06):
Just practice it.
Practice it small.
It's sometimes hard to do the bigstuff right away, but just try it.
Challenge yourself.
I so fully believe, and it gets meexcited that there are gonna be ripples
coming out of Fenwick that are gonna haveprofound effects on so many people and
(01:10:30):
on so many families and on a small townand a community, and a county and a state
that will continue for years to come.
Because when you changed yourlife, you changed the ripples.
And it's just simply myhope to keep that going.
(01:10:52):
It's why we want it to bebigger, not because of money, not
because of recognition, but wow.
What a legacy for all of you toleave that it started with you.
Fenwick, meth capital of Montco Countyor Fenwick Man, people are really
(01:11:13):
nice there and they sure love you.
That one sounds a lot betterto me than meth capital.
Let's take that, get that outof the way so it can start right
here and it can start right herewith you, right where you're at.
(01:11:34):
You don't have to be a biggerfish in a bigger pond, in a
different job, in a different home.
Years down the road, you can be exactlywhere you're at in your recovery right
now, today to have an amazing impact.
And you're not alone.
(01:11:59):
Don't underestimate yourself.
Let's see, what kind ofthings can happen here?
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