Monsteropolis: Sandown Sam The Space Ghost Clown

We're tackling a particularly weird case today while Mark takes a much deserved vacation. Seth, Heather and guest host Aaron dive into the 1973 case of Sam the Sandown Clown, one of the most bizarre monsters... well, ever. 

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SHOW NOTES:

BUFORA Journal Report - 1978

Monsteropolis

Sam the Sandown Space Ghost Clown

 

INTRO

 

We told you Seth was coming back. Ha! But there’s a catch! Mark is on vacation. I know, total rip off. I’m sorry. Some other guy is here to fill the mic. 

 

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• Today we’re talking about a case that is usually discussed in UFO circles, but we’ve picked it because it has a very, very weird monster. And really, the incident itself doesn’t have any ACTUAL UFO sightings - just some nearby ones that add to the mystery. Get ready. 

 

We’re going to the UK today. All the way, all the way over there. 

 

It’s May 1973, Tuesday at around 4 PM, the Isle of Wite, near Lake Common, adjacent to the town of Sandown. Two wee children, around age seven. Their names have not been publicly disclosed apparently, even all these darn years later. Can’t say I blame them though, and you’re about to find out why. They are usually referred to in retellings as “Fay” and “Unnamed boy”

 

• SUDDENLY, they heard a HORRIBLE WAILING NOISE which they described as sounding like an ambulance. Being wee curious children they investigated, following the sound into the woods. Why’s there an ambulance in the woods? That’s a good question. There’s not. 

 

The wee children found themselves near a little bridge running over a little stream, very idyllic except for the wailing, when SUDDENLY A WEIRD GUY WAS THERE. 

 

About seven feet tall and dressed like a clown. Triangle shaped eyes. Three toes and three fingers. Appeared to be made of WOOD. Like, wooden planks for arms. Also wooden antennae poking out from either side of it’s head. Red hair that fell to the forehead, and circular marks on his cheeks, even a little bob on top of the hat.  

 

And when we say “dressed like a clown” we’re talking green tunic, white breeches, conical yellow yat. Like something straight out of Rankin & Bass, but like, wrong. Also, seven feet tall. You know what? Here’s a picture.

 

I just love this dude so much

 

He kind of trips and splashes in the water, and he’s holding this book. Like a regular book. And he drops the thing, right in the water, sort of playing out this whole cartoonish thing, like you hear the music from the animated movie based on this in your head and it’s like “womp WOMP womp WOMP womp womp WOMP WOMP wompy wompy WOMP WOMP WOMP”

 

Then it picks up the book, jumps up on the riverbank and starts like, DANCING AROUND like it’s on the moon or something, lifting it’s legs up super high, doing a fancy jig I guess. THEN it turned and ran off towards a small metal hut, which had apparently been there the whole time, and dashed inside. 

 

• What? This isn’t normal? Seems very normal to me. 

 

And the kids are scared, I mean, you know, they’re not having a great time. This isn’t what they signed up for. But then the tall weird dude comes back, and he’s holding a microphone, and the wailing sound picks back up and the kids are like, nah dude, and they book it. 

 

But then the wailing sound stops, and the weird clown man TALKED.

“Hello. Are you still there?”

 

And the kids can hear him, even though he’s “fifty meters” away. Did I mention the microphone? He’s talking into the microphone. So they stop and turn back and clown brother takes the book back out, the one he dropped earlier. He scribbled a bunch of stuff in the book and showed it to the kids, but was apparently just a bunch of random words out of order. Then he starts pointing, one word at time, repeating the same sequence over and over again. And the message said,

 

“I AM ALL COLORS SAM. HELLO AND I AM ALL COLORS SAM.”

 

Would anyone like to play the part of “kids” for this sequence, I’m down to play Clown, I can also just make scifi noises in the background if you guys wanna do it

 

KIDS - “Are you a man”

CLOWN - “No”

KIDS - “Are you human”

CLOWN - “No”

KIDS - “Are you a ghost”

CLOWN - “Not really, but