The Covert Narcissism Podcast

The Covert Narcissism Podcast

Covert narcissistic abuse crushes one’s soul. This podcast is devoted to understanding covert narcissistic abuse, its effect on the victims, and how to heal.

Episodes

October 5, 2025 21 mins

You didn’t just wake up one day and decide to slap them.
That moment — the one that now fills you with shame and self-blame — didn’t come out of nowhere. It’s been building for a long time.

In this episode, Renee Swanson explores what happens when years of emotional invalidation, manipulation, and gaslighting finally push you past your breaking point. When your calm exterior cracks, and your reaction — whether yelling, slamming a do...

Mark as Played

What happens when survivors of covert narcissistic abuse come together in one safe space? At our recent CNG retreat, fifteen women gathered with fear, doubt, hope, and courage. Some were terrified to share their stories, afraid of judgment or dismissal. Others were overflowing with relief at finally being heard.

In this episode, I reflect on the lessons and transformations from that weekend: the power of connection, the validation ...

Mark as Played

Have you ever wondered why just being yourself feels like walking through a minefield with a covert narcissist? Why your joy, your truth, your boundaries, even your growth seem to set off explosions? In this episode, we unpack exactly why the covert narcissist sees you as a threat.

From your truth that cracks their carefully crafted image, to your feelings that highlight their emptiness, to your independence, awareness, and growth ...

Mark as Played

In Part 2 of my conversation with singer-songwriter Caryn Dixon, we go deeper into the journey of leaving—and staying gone—from covert narcissistic abuse. Caryn opens up about the staggering reality that it takes an average of seven attempts to leave an abusive relationship before it finally sticks, and why so many survivors find themselves pulled back into the cycle again and again.

She shares the powerful response her video on th...

Mark as Played

What happens when you stop pouring all your energy into someone else and start investing it back into yourself?

In a healthy relationship, your self-care is welcomed and even celebrated. Your partner enjoys the space to recharge too, and both of you come back stronger. But in a relationship with a covert narcissist, pulling back your supply—the constant attention, caretaking, and emotional labor—can trigger explosions, implosions, ...

Mark as Played

In this first half of my two-part conversation with singer-songwriter Caryn Dixon, we explore the story behind her new EP Bird in a Cage—a raw and vulnerable collection of songs written out of her experience of covert narcissistic abuse. Caryn shares how life inside the “perfect couple” image felt more like a shrinking cage, one that left her hiding her pain, questioning her reality, and carrying invisible bruises.

We talk about th...

Mark as Played

In today’s episode, I step away from the usual format to share something deeply personal and profoundly important. This is a tribute—a celebration of life—for a member of our community whose story ended too soon. For her privacy, I will call her Mary.

Mary’s life was marked by decades of devotion, sacrifice, and quiet endurance. Though her family didn’t see her pain, and though her reality went unacknowledged in her death, we will ...

Mark as Played

Leaving a covert narcissist isn’t a single moment of walking out the door—it’s a layered process that unfolds in stages. In this episode, I explore the three different ways survivors leave: physically, emotionally, and mentally.

  • In physically abusive relationships, your body often leaves first for safety, while your heart and mind lag behind.

  • In emotionally abusive relationships, your heart shuts down long before your b...

Mark as Played

You’ve researched. You’ve reasoned. You’ve shown empathy. You’ve tried again and again to help them see the truth—about their behavior, the damage, the disconnection. But nothing changes.

In this episode, Renee Swanson explores one of the most painful patterns survivors of covert narcissistic abuse face: the endless attempts to help, to explain, to connect—and the devastating realization that it never leads to real progress.

Throug...

Mark as Played

Have you ever replayed a conversation in your head, wondering if you misunderstood what was said—or if you were being manipulated? In relationships with covert narcissists, it’s rarely the words themselves that do the most damage. It’s the intent, the tone, and the unspoken energy behind them.

In this episode, we explore how the same words can hold completely different meanings depending on who is saying them—and why. From “I don’t...

Mark as Played

If Covert Narcissism 101 exposed the basics, get ready for the advanced curriculum. This is Part Two of our two-part series — and today, we’re tackling Covert Narcissism 102: The Final Exam You Never Wanted to Take.

In this sarcastic “classroom lecture,” we break down the advanced strategies covert narcissists seem to master: weaponizing forgetfulness, controlling through chaos, hijacking holidays, rewriting history, and keeping th...

Mark as Played

Have you ever noticed that covert narcissists all seem to follow the exact same script? It’s as if they sat in the same classroom, took the same notes, and memorized the same textbook.

In this episode — Part One of a two-part series — we crack open that mysterious manual: Covert Narcissism 101. From the art of the half-apology, to gaslighting, silent treatments, and the polished public persona, you’ll hear the “lessons” every cover...

Mark as Played

One of the most painful realities of living with a covert narcissist is the absence of reconciliation. Conflicts don’t get repaired. Apologies are either nonexistent or so hollow they echo in your chest. You’re left holding the pieces of a conflict, waiting for your partner to help put them back together—only to realize they’ve already walked away, acting like nothing happened.

In this episode, Renee Swanson explores the gaping hol...

Mark as Played

Divorcing a covert narcissist is not just about paperwork—it’s about survival. Today on the Covert Narcissism Podcast, I sit down with Bree Sullivan-Howell, a seasoned family law attorney with over two decades of experience and the author of Crush Your Divorce and Keep Your Faith and Crush Your Comeback. Bree brings both practical wisdom from the courtroom and heartfelt guidance for the personal and spiritual battles that survivors...

Mark as Played

When you’re in a relationship with a covert narcissist, it can feel like living in Never Never Land—a place where no one grows up, nothing ever gets resolved, and you’re left carrying all the weight. At first, their charm feels like magic. They’re playful, adventurous, fun. But when real life shows up—accountability, conflict, emotional depth—they shut down, lash out, or retreat into blame.

Mark as Played

“You have the right to remain silent. Anything you say can and will be used against you in a court of law. You have the right to an attorney. If you cannot afford an attorney, one will be provided for you. Do you understand the rights I have just read to you? With these rights in mind, do you wish to speak to me?”
Now that I have shown how I will treat every word that comes out of your mouth, you better just shut up. I’m better tha...

Mark as Played

You don’t have to know the terminology to know when something feels wrong.
Long before I knew the term gaslighting, I knew the dizzying confusion of hearing “I never said that” about something I remembered clearly. Before I’d ever heard of circular conversations, I knew the frustration of talking in circles until I was the one apologizing. Before I could name moving goalposts, I knew the exhaustion of never being able to “get it rig...

Mark as Played

They’ve stopped yelling. They’re going to therapy. They’re more “attentive.” So why does it still feel like nothing’s changed?

In this final episode of our 4-part series with Dr. Anthony Mazzella, we dive into one of the most misunderstood dynamics in narcissistic relationships: the collapse of guilt into shame—and how it sabotages real change.

We explore:

  • Why narcissistically inclined individuals can’t tolerate guilt

  • H...

Mark as Played

When the Child You Protected Believes the Narcissist
It’s a betrayal that cuts deeper than most people can understand—when your adult child, the one you protected for years, turns on you and takes the side of the covert narcissist. If you’re walking through this devastating experience, you are not alone.

I’m opening a small, supportive Zoom coaching group just for parents facing this heartbreak. This group is a safe place to process...

Mark as Played

What if that apology wasn’t about you at all?
What if the moment that looked like remorse was really a carefully constructed move to restore a fractured image?

In this powerful continuation of our series with Dr. Anthony Mazzella from The Narcissism Decoder podcast, we dive beneath the surface of “I’m sorry” to explore what’s really going on: the tangled relationship between guilt, shame, narcissism, and the illusion of empathy.

We ...

Mark as Played

Popular Podcasts

    If you've ever wanted to know about champagne, satanism, the Stonewall Uprising, chaos theory, LSD, El Nino, true crime and Rosa Parks, then look no further. Josh and Chuck have you covered.

    Dateline NBC

    Current and classic episodes, featuring compelling true-crime mysteries, powerful documentaries and in-depth investigations. Follow now to get the latest episodes of Dateline NBC completely free, or subscribe to Dateline Premium for ad-free listening and exclusive bonus content: DatelinePremium.com

    The Joe Rogan Experience

    The official podcast of comedian Joe Rogan.

    On Purpose with Jay Shetty

    I’m Jay Shetty host of On Purpose the worlds #1 Mental Health podcast and I’m so grateful you found us. I started this podcast 5 years ago to invite you into conversations and workshops that are designed to help make you happier, healthier and more healed. I believe that when you (yes you) feel seen, heard and understood you’re able to deal with relationship struggles, work challenges and life’s ups and downs with more ease and grace. I interview experts, celebrities, thought leaders and athletes so that we can grow our mindset, build better habits and uncover a side of them we’ve never seen before. New episodes every Monday and Friday. Your support means the world to me and I don’t take it for granted — click the follow button and leave a review to help us spread the love with On Purpose. I can’t wait for you to listen to your first or 500th episode!

    The Bobby Bones Show

    Listen to 'The Bobby Bones Show' by downloading the daily full replay.

Advertise With Us
Music, radio and podcasts, all free. Listen online or download the iHeart App.

Connect

© 2025 iHeartMedia, Inc.