The Gray Area

The Gray Area

Putting your self-healing in relational contexts- estrangement, marriage/partnership, and parenting Kate Gray, LMFT @codependencykate Find me on TikTok, Instagram, and Youtube @CodependencyKate

Episodes

July 29, 2025 57 mins

Shawna Lander is the crazy talented actor behind her skit series on family dynamics. It features characters Shawna, her husband John, her MIL Barb, SIL Jen, and others… I was lucky enough to connect with her and talk with her about her work and mission, motherhood, and most specifically, her extremely triggering character Barb! Hope you all enjoy this as much as I did!

Find Shawna @shawnathemom on TikTok, YouTube, and Instagram

Fin...

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So I may have posted a controversial take on "meanness" and how to address it in parenting... and it triggered a LOT of people. I think these same people that were triggered by it would really benefit from how my take applies to their marriage. Listen and let me know!

Find me @CodependencyKate on Instagram, TikTok, and YouTube :)

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This episode was such a big deal for me to have out on time. I have been blocked and blocked from a creative standpoint but after using BEND and (many) hate lists I got right back on track. It's a heavy subject today.... but finally addressing physical abuse in estrangement and asking the tough questions that come from that.

Find more @CodependencyKate on Instagram, TikTok, and YouTube

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On this episode I cover a topic I am MOST passionate about- internalizing. Don't listen to this episode unless you're ready for some hard truths.... all said with love of course. This information might be the missing link to your emotional health that you've been looking for... I hope so at least!

Find more @CodependencyKate on TikTok, Instagram and YouTube

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In this episode I'll answer people's submitted questions!

1. How do I help my 15/17 year olds detach and have their own boundaries?

2. How do I help my 18 year old with anxiety?

3. My adult daughter is blaming me for her relationship problems, where do I go from here?

Find more @CodependencyKate on TikTok, Instagram, and YouTube

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In this episode I talk about revelations I've had this week... specifically about the role of "enmeshment" in issues of estrangement. In summary, enmeshment is the heart of EVERYTHING relationship problems and I believe MOST people are enmeshed. I explain what it is, what it looks like, how I believe it came to be, and examples of it/what to do about it. It is not the end for you!!!

Find me on TikTok, Instragram, and YouTube @Codep...

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Intellectualizing is what is holding you back in your relationships! It can show up as defensiveness or being "logical" when the situation calls for presence, attunement, compassion and curiosity. It can hold you back in your relationship with your KIDS especially! Learn everything you need to know to change this behavior so you can finally learn the felt sense of connection. 

Find more @CodependencyKate on TikTok, IG, and YouTube

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In this podcast we put a pause on Conversations with Sierra to address the videos I posted this week! I'll get into the 4 skills of emotion regulation to prevent crashouts (self-compassion, BEND, hate lists, and forecasting your emotional weather) rumination, emotional eating, gratitude, and BRIEFLY financial generosity and emotional negligence. It is not a very organized episode, just a lot of me yapping!! But I hope you find some...

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June 3, 2025 82 mins

This is part 1 of Conversations with Sierra. Sierra is a vibrant, intelligent, goofy 25 year old who happens to be estranged from her mother. This is not necessarily uncommon in this day and age but the part of it that is...is that her mother posts about this estrangement online. Hear the story of how Sierra grew up, what led to the estrangement, and how she's found peace today. If you are struggling with your estrangement, she hop...

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Kate sits down with fellow TikToker Sister Kathryn, a Muslim author and mom of 5. They initially did not have a very pleasant interaction, but wanted to turn it into a learning experience for others. Watch the TikTok that started it all, and then listen in as they discuss what therapists need to know about their Muslim clients. 

Watch full video on YouTube

Find Sister Kathryn on TikTok or her website

Find Kate on TikTok @restoringr...

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part 3/3 of the Class with Kate series on "being"

With all the tragedy and loss happening in the world, learning to just "be" kind of doesn't make sense. It doesn't seem useful or helpful.. like, what's the point? Well, I argue that life is about more than productivity and "doing." And "being" does NOT mean escaping to the mountaintop like a monk. Find out what it can mean for you and make sure to listen and give feedback on this e...

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Do you identify with the term "empath" but are not sure what to make of it? If not "empath," what about highly sensitive person (HSP), codependent, or anxious attachment? If you've REALLY scoured the internet, you might've come up with the term "enmeshed." If any of these apply to you, you might struggle with boundaries and standing up for yourself. But the good news is, this is NOT YOUR FAULT. Listen in as we delve into the practi...

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November 14, 2022 20 mins

Do you not know how to just "be"? Does it feel either overwhelming or empty when you sit down and take a second to relax? If so, you are NOT alone- it is so common for high-functional people to go to therapy after feeling this way. But DON'T WORRY, this is fixable! Let's get you your "sauce" back.

Listen and give feedback on this episode's insta post

Follow Kate on TikTok@ restoringrelationships

Subscribe to get updated at www.rest...

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November 13, 2022 2 mins

Welcome to all the new listeners!

Find Kate on TikTok

Subscribe to get updates on RR.com

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Kate (MFT student) and Kelly (LPC-temp) discuss the issue of diagnosing yourself from online mental health therapists. Kate, being an online content creator, gives these mental health professionals the benefit of the doubt. But Kelly is not so sure. Will they find middle ground?

Watch on YouTube

Subscribe at www.restoringrelationships.com

Find Kate on TikTok@ restoringrelationships

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Kate meets with therapist, author, speaker, and fellow TikTok creator KC Davis. They met about 6 months ago, when Kate challenged one of KC's TikTok videos on anger and boundaries. KC responded, but a resolution between the two was not found. In part 1, Kate gets to know the person behind the creator, and part 2, airing on KC's platform "Struggle Care" November 6th, will answer the question- can they come to an understanding? 

Watc...

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Kate interviews Meg, who is the therapist behind the popular Instagram account, @antiworktherapist. In her private practice, Meg treats mostly therapists that are just burnt TF out on the "work" side of therapy. Listen in as Kate finds out what really happens in these sessions and how Meg navigates both her clients and her own mental health in the search for work-life balance.

Watch on YouTube- https://youtu.be/VjjCTh9y-fw

Also on ...

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Kate and Kelly discuss. 

 

Watch on Youtube- https://youtu.be/sFuKnqYINR0

Also on Spotify, Apple, and Google Podcasts

Subscribe to get updates- www.restoringrelationships.com

Find Kate on TikTok@ restoringrelationships

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Kate and Kelly discuss one of Kelly's biggest pet peeves- fitness influencers. Kelly starts off by mentioning a particular fitness influencer on TikTok, and explains how their message can be harmful to teenagers specifically. Kate has a different perspective and comes to the influencer's defense, having a social media following herself.  See what conclusions they come to and where responsibility lies in the spirit of "restoring rel...

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Kelly, 27 yo queer LPC, and Kate, 30 yo straight MFT masters student (both married to men), have an open dialogue about sexuality and gender. Watch them model how to directly discuss these things with friends with a tone of sensitivity, curiosity, and compassion.

Watch on YouTube- https://youtu.be/nMjPEo5r58w

Also on Spotify, Apple, and Google Podcasts

Subscribe to get updates- www.restoringrelationships.com

Find Kate on TikTok@ r...

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