March 14, 2023 • 22 mins
I am still shocked at the unbelievable power our minds have in and over our lives.
Our minds can seriously change our reality and how we experience our external world.
I share with you some recent experiences in my own life where I literally changed my external experiences by changing my mindset.
It changed the progress I was making in my weight loss journey, and it changed an important relationship in my life.
This stuff is MAGIC y'all.
Things to ask yourself from this episode- How are you seeing things? What are you telling yourself that might be keeping you stuck?
Tell me what you thought of this episode and send me a DM on Facebook or Instagram
If you want to learn more about the coach I am using you can find her on Instagram here. She is amazing and has lots of good fitness tips, motivation, and inspiration!
xoxo,
💋 ✨ Chelsea
#lawofattraction #stepintoyourpower #selftalk #selflove #spiritualgrowth #manifestation #ownyourpower #youaremagic #selfhealing #heartaf #yourpower #mindset #powerofmind
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
(00:05):
Hey everyone, what's up?
It's Chelsea Van Buskirkwith the Heart AF podcast.
Hope you guys are all doing well.
I'm so happy to be recording aepisode today because I've had a lot
of stuff going on, so I haven't beenable to get, um, into a space to
record, but I've got two interviewpodcasts though, in the bank that I'll
launch here soon, so that's exciting.
Um, but.
(00:25):
I wanted to share with you guys someof my weight loss story, because
that's kind of what I've been focusinga lot of my energy on, I guess you
could say, the past two months.
And there was a significant shift in myprogress and I really wanted to share
that with you because this shift couldbe applied into basically anything,
(00:47):
um, that you might be strugglingor working with in your own life.
So for me, I think I've shared alittle bit about this, but let me
just give you a bit of a background.
Um, I pretty much was atlike my healthy ideal weight.
The beginning of 2021.
I was feeling really great.
I was really active and Iwas feeling real confident.
(01:07):
You know, I was feelin' myself, likethings were going good in my life
and I felt really good in my body.
Um, when my dad passed away thatJune, I really let myself go
in a, a myriad of ways, right?
Um, definitely there was a lotof emotional stuff going on.
Um, you know, I was doing mybest to take care of myself, but
probably not all in the best ways.
(01:29):
I definitely was drinking more thanI normally do, things like that.
I love sweets.
Like I'm, I'm a sweet tooth.
A sugar addict.
I'm a sugar addict.
Thank you.
My name's Chelsea.
I'm a sugar addict.
Um, and I use food a lot to copewith my feelings and um, I think
that's something that can be normal.
And the tricky part with foodis, Food is meant to be enjoyed.
(01:50):
Food is an experience and food issomething that we actually need, right?
We do need to nourish our bodies.
We do need to feed our bodies.
And so that can be a bit of amind fuck when you are maybe using
food to make yourself feel better.
Because we do get pleasure, likeexperiences from food, right?
And food is a substancethat we do need to survive.
(02:11):
And so, , it can be, um, youknow, an abused, um, drug,
so to speak in some ways.
And, um, anyway, so, I hadgained some weight, but not like
an excessive amount I would say.
But, um, I was, I was unhappy.
I was, you know, my, uh, , clotheswere feeling tight and I wasn't exactly
super comfortable, but I wasn't like, Souncomfortable that I was really willing
(02:33):
to do like a lot of what I needed to do.
So, um, I guess the best way isto just put numbers on it, right?
I have a trickyrelationship with the scale.
I know it's really just adata tracking device, right?
Like, it, it shouldn't really, youknow, my value isn't based on the
number on . The scale, I know that.
But it is a measurement and it's a tool.
And I know that there's a certainweight range where I know that's where
I feel good and confident in my body.
(02:55):
And I was about 10 pounds over that.
And I struggled.
That space of likewanting to lose 10 pounds.
Um, you know, pretty much all of lastyear, 2022, I was really trying, but
I really just kinda was riding thisline of like, you know, I maybe lose
a couple pounds and gain it back.
So I really wasn't losing or gaining,I just was kind of maintaining at
this space where it still was about 10pounds over where I really wanted to be.
(03:17):
Um, and so then towards the end oflast year, I, um, decided to join
a binge eating recovery program.
Um, and with that, It was learning moreabout intuitive eating and, um, you know,
throwing away to scale and not tracking.
So I, I, I pretty muchstopped tracking altogether.
Um, really just was trying to usemy intuition as far as like eating
(03:41):
when I was hungry, stopping whenI was full, that kind of thing.
And to get over this kind ofbinge eating disorder I've been
struggling with for many years.
Um, so in doing that, you know, Istopped weighing myself and, and
just, you know, lived life, whatever.
But after, or even really duringthe holidays, I was really feeling
more uncomfortable in my clothes.
Like a lot more of my clothesweren't fitting right.
(04:02):
I just, nothing reallylooked right on my body.
I just, it was foreign to me.
Right?
Like my body had changedshape and I noticed that.
And I also knew that even thoughI was healing a certain aspect
of like my food issues, right?
And the binge eating, um, Thing I wasdealing with and recovering from and,
and really healing my relationshipwith food and things like that.
(04:23):
I also was neglecting really, likemaking more nourishing choices.
Right.
Um, and that's something youkind of have to break through.
So it's almost like.
Um, you know, instead of like restrictingall the foods, it's like letting yourself
eat what you want in, in a lot of ways.
And that's kind of what youhave to do to break yourself.
So then you know that you canhave it whenever you want.
(04:44):
It's not this forbidden fruit thatyou're like obsessed about and
then end up overeating, right?
It's about learning to know thatyou can have whatever you want.
within reason.
Right.
But, um, learning to, to acclimateyourself to, like, when you're exposed
to maybe foods that in your head, youmight have thought they were off limits or
they're, you know, "bad" foods and they'revery tempting and so then you almost like
overeat them because you feel like thisis your one only chance to eat as much as
(05:06):
you can because you're not supposed to.
Versus having the mindset that it'salways there, it's always gonna be
there, it's always available for me.
I can have it whenever I want so thatway I can just get my taste and be good.
Instead of over indulging andso going through that process,
you do tend to gain weight.
And even when I was in my like recoverygroup, we talked about that too.
Like especially if you ever do anintuitive eating program or work
(05:27):
with a dietician who is trained inintuitive eating, that is normal, right?
Like you tend to maybe gain weight inthe beginning of this process because
you are taking off all those rules andbarriers that you once put on yourself.
And so it's kind ofthis relearning process.
All that to say fastforward, end of December.
I decided to step on the scale andweigh myself because it had been,
(05:49):
I think, four months at that pointsince I had last weighed myself.
And lo behold, I was 10pounds heavier than I was.
Four months earlier.
And so that meant I was 20 poundsover what my ideal comfortable
body weight usually is.
So I knew I needed to get back intoa routine, but I really wanted to go
into this routine with having a healthymindset where it wasn't to punish myself.
I didn't wanna get to the point whereI was obsessively, you know, tracking
(06:12):
and again, seeing foods as good and bad.
Like I really wanted to use the tools andthe things I had done to work through,
um, with the binge eating, um, recoveryand, and you know, just kinda applying all
this stuff to culminate so that I couldactually have the body that I wanted,
that I feel comfortable and confident inand good in and, but do it in a healthy,
sustainable way where it wasn't gonna beso taxing on my lifestyle that I was still
(06:33):
gonna be able to, you know, go out andenjoy my friends and family and not have
to like, have this looming weight loss.
Um, I don't know, . Challengeover my head, so to speak.
Um, and so I had gotten recommended, um,a coach that my sister-in-law works with
and fell in love with this girl, right?
She's a lot younger than me.
And so were a lot of the participantsin this coaching program.
(06:55):
I'm the oldest.
It's fine.
It's fine.
Um, but.
I love her ideology.
I love how she focusesa lot on, um, mindset.
Like she touches on a lot of things thatI talk about here in my podcast as far
as, you know, manifesting and the wholemindset thing and like law of attraction.
Um, and not only that, but she'svery, um, versed in, realistic goals
(07:16):
and she's all about sustainability.
And again, like how to still achieve yourgoals, but do it in a sustainable way,
like a very, like step-by-step approach.
And anyway, just really lovedthis girl joined her program
at the beginning of January.
And, I, we, one of the thingsis we are tracking data.
We are take, I take my weightevery morning and it's one of
those things where she's like,you just don't worry about that.
(07:37):
Like, we just wanna see trendswhere it's just data tracking and
um, which is something I do haveto get it is still getting used to.
Right.
And I see the weight fluctuate,which is totally normal.
And if you read any well versedperson who is like whole, like, can
do like weight loss in a, in a whole.
Approach, not necessarily holistic,I do like the holistic approach, but
(07:59):
using a full spectrum picture, likebeing realistic and that results aren't
linear, is what I'm trying to say.
So it's not like you start, like, it'snot like a straight line of progress.
It's gonna be an up and down, journey,especially when you're looking at data
points, like things will go up anddown and fluctuate because that's just
normal, like your water weight, like,especially with women, with having our
(08:19):
monthly cycles and stuff, like things willfluctuate, your weight will fluctuate.
But the thing is you wannasee a general downward trend.
That means you're getting results.
If you see a, uh, you know thatdownward trend over time, but you
will see things go up and down.
Including the, the numberon the scale, right?
Like you might see it drop and then itgoes back up and then, you know, it does
this kind of seesaw motion, but you seea gradual trending downwards, right?
(08:43):
So that's all the backgroundinformation I'm trying to give you
about what this, the, the real, meatybits of what I want to get to you.
I was, I was fluctuating again,but like started to feel like
I was making some progress.
And I could see in the pictures and theprogress pictures, you could clearly
see that there were some body changes.
Um, but my weight was not moving asfast as I wanted to, and I felt like
I was like really trying so hard.
(09:03):
I wasn't missing any workouts.
I was getting my water in everyday, was getting my steps in,
like, but I wasn't seeing resultsas fast as I wanted them to.
And of course, I wasn't a hundredpercent perfect with my nutrition.
like as far as hitting every macro goals,but I was doing like the best I could.
And I know from experience that if youdo like pretty on point, 80% of the time
(09:25):
you should still see results, right?
It doesn't have to be a hundredpercent cuz that's not real Life.
Perfection is not real.
So I was frustrated because I felt I.
Like the scale wasn't movingas fast as I wanted to.
And I had these goals I wantedto meet, like I wanted to reach
a certain weight by the time I goon this vacation here coming up.
And then there's another vacationI'm going on with my husband at the
end of April and I really wanna hitanother milestone by that vacation.
(09:45):
So it's like, I felt like I was not, likemy trajectory I felt like wasn't getting,
like, I wasn't gonna make those goalsand I was really frustrated with myself.
And so what I was doing is I waslooking at myself in the mirror
like, oh, like this, why isthis like, it's so hard for me.
Like maybe it is because I'm older.
Like, you know, I started to.
My mind was going to those storiesyou hear all the time, you know,
where it is harder to lose weightwhen you're older, you know, like with
(10:06):
your changing body and the age, likeit'll make, it'll slow down things
and things are gonna be a lot harder.
Um, you know, and I was, I was, I wascircling those thoughts in my head.
Like, I, you know, it must beharder now because I'm older.
It's, it's harder on me now because,Um, you know, whatever, or my body's
just not working anymore, or, you know,I would look at myself in the mirror
and just be like disgusted, like, oh,I just want this belly to go away.
(10:28):
Like, oh, I wish my bodylooked better in these pants.
And I did a workshop and I, I had a speechthat was filmed on stage, and the whole
time I was looking at myself, like notthinking of the really awesome speech I
gave, but looking at my body and beinglike, oh my gosh, I cannot believe I,
I thought I looked good in that outfit.
It looked so fat, like all these negativeself-talk things I was telling myself.
and I was talking about some of thesefrustrations in one of my check-ins with
(10:51):
my coach, and I said, you know, hey,I'm like, I'm doing all the things, but
I'm, I'm kind of feeling frustrated.
Like I wish my progress was going faster,and it's really hard to have patience and
I just look at how far I still have to goand like, I'm still mad at myself because,
I'm still trying to just get to where Iwas, you know, in September of last year,
like I'm not even back to that weight.
And at that weight I was still 10pounds from where I wanted to be.
But now I'm like, so far, like I'm 20pounds and like, you know, I'm losing
(11:14):
like a few pounds here and there, butit still feels like there's so much
more to go to where I really wanna go.
And it's.
Discouraging.
I was feeling discouraged, seeing howmuch farther I still had to go, you know?
and she'd responded to that check-in,like, um, not in a harsh way, but like
I'm gonna paraphrase and use my words,but like, get your shit together, Chelsea.
Like this is, this is bullshit.
(11:35):
Quit talking to yourself like that.
You need to step intowho you wanna be, right?
She reminded me of the shit that I say allthe time in so many podcasts and so many
posts about how important your mindsetis and what you're telling yourself.
Like I was literally manifestingmy progress stalling.
Because of how I wastalking to myself, right?
Like I was saying to myself,it's hard for me to lose weight.
(11:55):
Like, I was focused on what was lacking.
I was focused on how much more I hadto go, and that's what was reflecting
back to me, that was keeping me inthis pattern of not making progress.
So I started again doing like mymorning gratitudes and affirmations
and so, you know, really.
Thinking from the end, like I tellyou guys before, like when you're
manifesting, you have to think thatit's already there for you, right?
(12:16):
You have to believe in that,that it's there for you.
So I started switching my mindset tolike, knowing, like, I lose weight
easily and effortlessly, right?
Like, I'm letting go of what nolonger serves me, including this
extra fat that's hanging on my body.
I'm releasing it.
I let it go.
Now, I, no, I no longer need it.
You know, like telling myselfthose things, like seeing that
I can get to my goals, right?
Like seeing that body that I know thatI've had before that I want, that I
(12:38):
wanna get to, I know that it's therefor me and I just have to keep trucking
and knowing that it's gonna come right?
And having that belief in myselfand really having more of a positive
attitude and seeing from the end,like seeing how it's possible for
me, seeing that I'm gonna reach thesegoals by the dates that I want, right?
And really shifting that mindsetand that focus on what it is I want.
(13:01):
That's another point that I've saidbefore, and I'm gonna say it again, that
when you are manifesting or creatingstuff in your life that you don't
focus on what it is you don't want.
You don't focus on the part of wanting it.
You focus on already having it, knowingthat it's already here for you, and you
focus on what it is that you do want.
You don't focus on the factthat it's missing, right?
(13:22):
So if you're tellingyourself, I want this.
That's basically just reinforcing thatyou're always gonna be in a state of
wanting because you don't already have it.
You have to change that word, thatverbiage to, I have this, this
is for me, this is coming to me.
I see it coming for me.
I can see my future.
Right?
You think of your future self.
I saw recently, um, it might havebeen one of the girls in our coaching
group who talked about how they sawsomebody where their manifestation
(13:46):
technique or what they do for theirlike journaling process is they write
like things that they're grateful forright now, and then they write things
that they're grateful for for theirfuture self as if they already have it.
They're already grateful for itbecause they already have it, even
though it's something that they'rewanting to have in the future.
They're writing it as if they alreadyhave it and they're thankful for it,
and I love that idea and I think that'sa great process that you can utilize.
(14:08):
.So here's the thing.
Started doing these affirmations,these gratitudes, right?
Like seeing myself, achieving my goals.
The scale finally startedtrending downward.
And, last week I hit anew low and I can see it.
I'm gonna reach that firstgoal I set for myself.
I did not think it was gonna be possiblea few weeks ago when I was down in
that kind of pessimistic, discouragingmindset, like focusing on the lack, right?
(14:32):
But when I switched to that might ofabundance, when I switched to focusing on
what it is I want, when I started seeingfrom the end and knowing that I was gonna
get there and seeing what I wanted, right?
Like seeing that it was there for meand seeing that it was possible, right?
Like believing that it's possibleand holding onto that belief
in faith that it's coming.
(14:52):
Like I'm doing it.
It's happening.
I'm making progress.
I'm losing weight easilyand effortlessly, right?
So what's what's interesting too, so it'snot like I'm not doing the work, right?
And that's where it gets tricky, butit's like when you believe you are this
person and you see the thing that youwanna achieve or wanna be like that
future, when you start seeing yourselfas that's who you are or that's what
(15:13):
you wanna do, you naturally start doingthe things that that person is doing.
Do you see what I'm saying?
So when I see myself in that lowerfat percentage body, what is that
lower fat percentage body doing?
They are being more active.
They are not eating, um, somuch sweets excessively, right?
But it's like thisnatural thing that occurs.
I'm not punishing myself.
(15:34):
It's not something I'msuffering to get to my goals.
It's something that's naturally happeningbecause I see myself as that future
version of myself, and that's how I'mgonna act because that's how I see myself.
So this is kind of how this works.
It's not about you just like dreamyourself into getting the results.
You're still doing the work.
It's this subconscious thing thathappens in your mindset where you
start acting and behaving like thatperson you already wanna be, that
(15:56):
it's naturally occurring and that'show you're getting your results.
So, wow, the power of your mindand your self-talk and what you're
telling yourself is so importantand it applies to everything.
I don't care if you're trying to loseweight or not, or you've got other
things that are going on in your life.
Your mindset is what sets the tone.
Your mindset is whatchanges your perspective.
Your mindset is how you literallycan change your life because what you
(16:20):
tell yourself is how you see things.
It's how things are reflected back to you.
It's just, it's really crazy and I can usethis as an, another example that happened
to me recently too, is I was having.
A very poor attitude about a certainperson in my life you know, and I just
was like focused on all the things Ididn't like about the person and how they
were bothering me and just like gettingin that space where I was almost throwing
(16:41):
a pity party for myself because I wasjust having a bad attitude and just,
so frustrated, like, howcan I change this person?
And here's the thing is youcan't change other people.
People are gonna behave anddo what they're gonna do.
You can't do anything about it.
You're just have to let them be right.
But I can change me and I can change and,and realize what am I doing in my mind?
What am I focusing on?
and I switched that focus to justreally focusing on the things that
(17:02):
I do appreciate about that person.
What I do appreciate that they do.
And, and it was so crazy, like I'm talkingin a matter of minutes, switching my
focus, that my attitude changed, mypresence around the person changed.
I was not so like uptight and just, like kind of repelling myself and
like giving off that energy that Idon't wanna be around this person.
Like I was able to soften myselfand be more accepting and just
(17:22):
let that person be who they are.
And change my perspectiveon how I'm seeing that.
And then that made me feel better,right as I'm feeling better
and having a better attitude.
It just changes your whole like energyand your environment just by you
switching how you're perceiving things.
Because really, yourperception is your reality.
Like that really is thekey is how you see things.
That's how it is.
(17:42):
Right.
I'm gonna end it here, but I justreally want you guys to focus on.
How are you seeing things?
Like what are you telling yourselfthat might be keeping you stuck?
That might be keeping you in thisnegative spin on whatever situation it is?
Or maybe you do, maybe youare doing something or you're
trying to achieve something, oryou have a goal for yourself.
Like what is keeping youstuck or not seeing progress?
Is it your mindset?
(18:03):
Is it what you're telling yourself?
Are you beating yourself up?
. Like, stop that, right?
Like, I need to, I'mgonna check in with you.
Like my coach had to check in with me.
Stop that.
Cut it out.
Get yourself into a routine whereyou're talking to yourself lovingly,
where you're talking to yourselffrom your future self, right?
Like, what are the things that you want?
And then believe and stepinto that person, right?
Um, writing things down is a reallygreat way to shift things for yourself.
(18:26):
We just started a new challengewithin my, um, coaching group for
all the girls in the coaching group.
We are doing a 30 day challenge for themonth of March and a 30 days in April.
And for these first 30 days,we're focusing on habits.
And so the first three habits areour water intake goals, our step
goals, and a morning routine.
And then we got to pick twoto three of our own goals.
(18:48):
So for me, my morning routine, Thejournaling, my affirmations and gratitudes
and doing 10 minutes of reading,
like a self-development book or spiritualbook of some sort, you know, something
that's gonna, um, help gimme that.
positive mindset, that kind of thing.
And then, um, my water is a gallona day and my steps, it's only 8,500
a day, which isn't a whole lot,but some days that feels a lot.
(19:10):
Reaching my step goal.
And then walking for 20minutes, at least outside.
Um, so I'm about to go walk outside now.
It's a lot colder than I thoughtit was gonna be and a little bit
more drizzly, so that's a bummer.
But I'm still gonna go outside becausebeing outside is something that's
very, like soulful, I don't know how toexplain it, but just being outside is
just something that's good for my soul.
So I'm making it a point to challengemyself, no matter the weather, to get
(19:32):
outside for at least 20 minutes a day.
Um, and I've been doing that everyday since the 1st of March, so I'm
really excited to keep that going.
It's, and it's just, you know,when you start checking things off
for yourself, when you have goals,it's something that kinda helps you
self-motivate and it makes you feel good.
Keeps building that kind of momentumof positive energy, reinforcing
that motivation for yourself.
It's actually the action that , getsyou that motivation, right?
(19:52):
We always tend to think it's theother way around, but really it's the
action that propels the motivationthat keeps us to keep making the
action that propels the motivation.
So my advice for you, something that youcould do to start small, really, like,
easily, whether you do it at morning ornight or both, is just listing, you know,
three affirmations and three gratitudes.
When you're in a state of gratitude,like it just puts you in a
(20:13):
positive mindset and you alwayshave something to be thankful for.
I'm telling you.
The fact that you're alive andbreathing today, you are great.
. Be grateful for that, right?
There's something to be grateful for you.
It could be bare minimum.
I'm grateful that I havefood to feed myself today.
I am grateful that I have air to breathe.
I'm grateful that I have a place torest my head, things like that, right?
And then you can evenget into more in depth.
You know, I'm grateful, youknow, for friends and family.
(20:34):
I'm grateful for my physical body.
I'm grateful for theexperiences that come to me.
I'm grateful for unexpected blessings.
There's so many things that you canexpress gratitude for, but if you get
in the habit of listing three things.
You know, keep it small.
Three things either, you know, do itin the morning to set your mind right
or maybe at night before you go to bed.
So that's like what your mind'sfocused on is gratitude before
you rest your head, go to bed.
(20:54):
get in that habit of gratitudes.
And then also affirming who you wanna be.
Like, take a moment to really justwrite out who you wanna be in every
aspect like, paint this perfect pictureof who you would like to be, write it
out, and then step into that persona.
Right.
Like, you know, I always like this yearI told you, this is the year of stepping
into being the badass bitch that I am.
(21:15):
Right?
So step into that badass bitch versionof yourself and write that out.
Who is that badass bitchwithin you that you wanna be?
See that it's there and it's possibleand step into that persona, right?
It's like putting on a suit andyou're embodying that vision of
yourself and watch it come to life.
It's amazing when things start happening,when you really switch things, and
that's, that was the point of thisepisode, is to really show you the
magic that you have inside you when youswitch that mindset and that self-talk.
(21:39):
I really hope you guys are doing well.
Let me know if you try some of thesetricks, whether it's, you know, just doing
the little affirmations or gratitudes orwriting out that best ideal version of
yourself and, tell me what happens whenyou start stepping into that persona,
you put that on and you show up in theworld as you are who you wanna be, and
see how it starts morphing into that.
See how that starts creatingitself for you, right?
(22:00):
That manifestation comes to life.
I wanna see it.
I wanna hear your stories.
Please reach out to me.
You can find me on Facebook or Instagram.
My handle is @chelsea.vanbuskirk,or you can find me on my website
at chelseavanbuskirk.com andI'll see you guys next week.
Peace.
Hey everyone, what's up?
It's Chelsea Van Buskirkwith the Heart AF podcast.
Hope you guys are all doing well.
I'm so happy to be recording aepisode today because I've had a lot
of stuff going on, so I haven't beenable to get, um, into a space to
record, but I've got two interviewpodcasts though, in the bank that I'll
launch here soon, so that's exciting.
Um, but.
(00:25):
I wanted to share with you guys someof my weight loss story, because
that's kind of what I've been focusinga lot of my energy on, I guess you
could say, the past two months.
And there was a significant shift in myprogress and I really wanted to share
that with you because this shift couldbe applied into basically anything,
(00:47):
um, that you might be strugglingor working with in your own life.
So for me, I think I've shared alittle bit about this, but let me
just give you a bit of a background.
Um, I pretty much was atlike my healthy ideal weight.
The beginning of 2021.
I was feeling really great.
I was really active and Iwas feeling real confident.
(01:07):
You know, I was feelin' myself, likethings were going good in my life
and I felt really good in my body.
Um, when my dad passed away thatJune, I really let myself go
in a, a myriad of ways, right?
Um, definitely there was a lotof emotional stuff going on.
Um, you know, I was doing mybest to take care of myself, but
probably not all in the best ways.
(01:29):
I definitely was drinking more thanI normally do, things like that.
I love sweets.
Like I'm, I'm a sweet tooth.
A sugar addict.
I'm a sugar addict.
Thank you.
My name's Chelsea.
I'm a sugar addict.
Um, and I use food a lot to copewith my feelings and um, I think
that's something that can be normal.
And the tricky part with foodis, Food is meant to be enjoyed.
(01:50):
Food is an experience and food issomething that we actually need, right?
We do need to nourish our bodies.
We do need to feed our bodies.
And so that can be a bit of amind fuck when you are maybe using
food to make yourself feel better.
Because we do get pleasure, likeexperiences from food, right?
And food is a substancethat we do need to survive.
(02:11):
And so, , it can be, um, youknow, an abused, um, drug,
so to speak in some ways.
And, um, anyway, so, I hadgained some weight, but not like
an excessive amount I would say.
But, um, I was, I was unhappy.
I was, you know, my, uh, , clotheswere feeling tight and I wasn't exactly
super comfortable, but I wasn't like, Souncomfortable that I was really willing
(02:33):
to do like a lot of what I needed to do.
So, um, I guess the best way isto just put numbers on it, right?
I have a trickyrelationship with the scale.
I know it's really just adata tracking device, right?
Like, it, it shouldn't really, youknow, my value isn't based on the
number on . The scale, I know that.
But it is a measurement and it's a tool.
And I know that there's a certainweight range where I know that's where
I feel good and confident in my body.
(02:55):
And I was about 10 pounds over that.
And I struggled.
That space of likewanting to lose 10 pounds.
Um, you know, pretty much all of lastyear, 2022, I was really trying, but
I really just kinda was riding thisline of like, you know, I maybe lose
a couple pounds and gain it back.
So I really wasn't losing or gaining,I just was kind of maintaining at
this space where it still was about 10pounds over where I really wanted to be.
(03:17):
Um, and so then towards the end oflast year, I, um, decided to join
a binge eating recovery program.
Um, and with that, It was learning moreabout intuitive eating and, um, you know,
throwing away to scale and not tracking.
So I, I, I pretty muchstopped tracking altogether.
Um, really just was trying to usemy intuition as far as like eating
(03:41):
when I was hungry, stopping whenI was full, that kind of thing.
And to get over this kind ofbinge eating disorder I've been
struggling with for many years.
Um, so in doing that, you know, Istopped weighing myself and, and
just, you know, lived life, whatever.
But after, or even really duringthe holidays, I was really feeling
more uncomfortable in my clothes.
Like a lot more of my clothesweren't fitting right.
(04:02):
I just, nothing reallylooked right on my body.
I just, it was foreign to me.
Right?
Like my body had changedshape and I noticed that.
And I also knew that even thoughI was healing a certain aspect
of like my food issues, right?
And the binge eating, um, Thing I wasdealing with and recovering from and,
and really healing my relationshipwith food and things like that.
(04:23):
I also was neglecting really, likemaking more nourishing choices.
Right.
Um, and that's something youkind of have to break through.
So it's almost like.
Um, you know, instead of like restrictingall the foods, it's like letting yourself
eat what you want in, in a lot of ways.
And that's kind of what youhave to do to break yourself.
So then you know that you canhave it whenever you want.
(04:44):
It's not this forbidden fruit thatyou're like obsessed about and
then end up overeating, right?
It's about learning to know thatyou can have whatever you want.
within reason.
Right.
But, um, learning to, to acclimateyourself to, like, when you're exposed
to maybe foods that in your head, youmight have thought they were off limits or
they're, you know, "bad" foods and they'revery tempting and so then you almost like
overeat them because you feel like thisis your one only chance to eat as much as
(05:06):
you can because you're not supposed to.
Versus having the mindset that it'salways there, it's always gonna be
there, it's always available for me.
I can have it whenever I want so thatway I can just get my taste and be good.
Instead of over indulging andso going through that process,
you do tend to gain weight.
And even when I was in my like recoverygroup, we talked about that too.
Like especially if you ever do anintuitive eating program or work
(05:27):
with a dietician who is trained inintuitive eating, that is normal, right?
Like you tend to maybe gain weight inthe beginning of this process because
you are taking off all those rules andbarriers that you once put on yourself.
And so it's kind ofthis relearning process.
All that to say fastforward, end of December.
I decided to step on the scale andweigh myself because it had been,
(05:49):
I think, four months at that pointsince I had last weighed myself.
And lo behold, I was 10pounds heavier than I was.
Four months earlier.
And so that meant I was 20 poundsover what my ideal comfortable
body weight usually is.
So I knew I needed to get back intoa routine, but I really wanted to go
into this routine with having a healthymindset where it wasn't to punish myself.
I didn't wanna get to the point whereI was obsessively, you know, tracking
(06:12):
and again, seeing foods as good and bad.
Like I really wanted to use the tools andthe things I had done to work through,
um, with the binge eating, um, recoveryand, and you know, just kinda applying all
this stuff to culminate so that I couldactually have the body that I wanted,
that I feel comfortable and confident inand good in and, but do it in a healthy,
sustainable way where it wasn't gonna beso taxing on my lifestyle that I was still
(06:33):
gonna be able to, you know, go out andenjoy my friends and family and not have
to like, have this looming weight loss.
Um, I don't know, . Challengeover my head, so to speak.
Um, and so I had gotten recommended, um,a coach that my sister-in-law works with
and fell in love with this girl, right?
She's a lot younger than me.
And so were a lot of the participantsin this coaching program.
(06:55):
I'm the oldest.
It's fine.
It's fine.
Um, but.
I love her ideology.
I love how she focusesa lot on, um, mindset.
Like she touches on a lot of things thatI talk about here in my podcast as far
as, you know, manifesting and the wholemindset thing and like law of attraction.
Um, and not only that, but she'svery, um, versed in, realistic goals
(07:16):
and she's all about sustainability.
And again, like how to still achieve yourgoals, but do it in a sustainable way,
like a very, like step-by-step approach.
And anyway, just really lovedthis girl joined her program
at the beginning of January.
And, I, we, one of the thingsis we are tracking data.
We are take, I take my weightevery morning and it's one of
those things where she's like,you just don't worry about that.
(07:37):
Like, we just wanna see trendswhere it's just data tracking and
um, which is something I do haveto get it is still getting used to.
Right.
And I see the weight fluctuate,which is totally normal.
And if you read any well versedperson who is like whole, like, can
do like weight loss in a, in a whole.
Approach, not necessarily holistic,I do like the holistic approach, but
(07:59):
using a full spectrum picture, likebeing realistic and that results aren't
linear, is what I'm trying to say.
So it's not like you start, like, it'snot like a straight line of progress.
It's gonna be an up and down, journey,especially when you're looking at data
points, like things will go up anddown and fluctuate because that's just
normal, like your water weight, like,especially with women, with having our
(08:19):
monthly cycles and stuff, like things willfluctuate, your weight will fluctuate.
But the thing is you wannasee a general downward trend.
That means you're getting results.
If you see a, uh, you know thatdownward trend over time, but you
will see things go up and down.
Including the, the numberon the scale, right?
Like you might see it drop and then itgoes back up and then, you know, it does
this kind of seesaw motion, but you seea gradual trending downwards, right?
(08:43):
So that's all the backgroundinformation I'm trying to give you
about what this, the, the real, meatybits of what I want to get to you.
I was, I was fluctuating again,but like started to feel like
I was making some progress.
And I could see in the pictures and theprogress pictures, you could clearly
see that there were some body changes.
Um, but my weight was not moving asfast as I wanted to, and I felt like
I was like really trying so hard.
(09:03):
I wasn't missing any workouts.
I was getting my water in everyday, was getting my steps in,
like, but I wasn't seeing resultsas fast as I wanted them to.
And of course, I wasn't a hundredpercent perfect with my nutrition.
like as far as hitting every macro goals,but I was doing like the best I could.
And I know from experience that if youdo like pretty on point, 80% of the time
(09:25):
you should still see results, right?
It doesn't have to be a hundredpercent cuz that's not real Life.
Perfection is not real.
So I was frustrated because I felt I.
Like the scale wasn't movingas fast as I wanted to.
And I had these goals I wantedto meet, like I wanted to reach
a certain weight by the time I goon this vacation here coming up.
And then there's another vacationI'm going on with my husband at the
end of April and I really wanna hitanother milestone by that vacation.
(09:45):
So it's like, I felt like I was not, likemy trajectory I felt like wasn't getting,
like, I wasn't gonna make those goalsand I was really frustrated with myself.
And so what I was doing is I waslooking at myself in the mirror
like, oh, like this, why isthis like, it's so hard for me.
Like maybe it is because I'm older.
Like, you know, I started to.
My mind was going to those storiesyou hear all the time, you know,
where it is harder to lose weightwhen you're older, you know, like with
(10:06):
your changing body and the age, likeit'll make, it'll slow down things
and things are gonna be a lot harder.
Um, you know, and I was, I was, I wascircling those thoughts in my head.
Like, I, you know, it must beharder now because I'm older.
It's, it's harder on me now because,Um, you know, whatever, or my body's
just not working anymore, or, you know,I would look at myself in the mirror
and just be like disgusted, like, oh,I just want this belly to go away.
(10:28):
Like, oh, I wish my bodylooked better in these pants.
And I did a workshop and I, I had a speechthat was filmed on stage, and the whole
time I was looking at myself, like notthinking of the really awesome speech I
gave, but looking at my body and beinglike, oh my gosh, I cannot believe I,
I thought I looked good in that outfit.
It looked so fat, like all these negativeself-talk things I was telling myself.
and I was talking about some of thesefrustrations in one of my check-ins with
(10:51):
my coach, and I said, you know, hey,I'm like, I'm doing all the things, but
I'm, I'm kind of feeling frustrated.
Like I wish my progress was going faster,and it's really hard to have patience and
I just look at how far I still have to goand like, I'm still mad at myself because,
I'm still trying to just get to where Iwas, you know, in September of last year,
like I'm not even back to that weight.
And at that weight I was still 10pounds from where I wanted to be.
But now I'm like, so far, like I'm 20pounds and like, you know, I'm losing
(11:14):
like a few pounds here and there, butit still feels like there's so much
more to go to where I really wanna go.
And it's.
Discouraging.
I was feeling discouraged, seeing howmuch farther I still had to go, you know?
and she'd responded to that check-in,like, um, not in a harsh way, but like
I'm gonna paraphrase and use my words,but like, get your shit together, Chelsea.
Like this is, this is bullshit.
(11:35):
Quit talking to yourself like that.
You need to step intowho you wanna be, right?
She reminded me of the shit that I say allthe time in so many podcasts and so many
posts about how important your mindsetis and what you're telling yourself.
Like I was literally manifestingmy progress stalling.
Because of how I wastalking to myself, right?
Like I was saying to myself,it's hard for me to lose weight.
(11:55):
Like, I was focused on what was lacking.
I was focused on how much more I hadto go, and that's what was reflecting
back to me, that was keeping me inthis pattern of not making progress.
So I started again doing like mymorning gratitudes and affirmations
and so, you know, really.
Thinking from the end, like I tellyou guys before, like when you're
manifesting, you have to think thatit's already there for you, right?
(12:16):
You have to believe in that,that it's there for you.
So I started switching my mindset tolike, knowing, like, I lose weight
easily and effortlessly, right?
Like, I'm letting go of what nolonger serves me, including this
extra fat that's hanging on my body.
I'm releasing it.
I let it go.
Now, I, no, I no longer need it.
You know, like telling myselfthose things, like seeing that
I can get to my goals, right?
Like seeing that body that I know thatI've had before that I want, that I
(12:38):
wanna get to, I know that it's therefor me and I just have to keep trucking
and knowing that it's gonna come right?
And having that belief in myselfand really having more of a positive
attitude and seeing from the end,like seeing how it's possible for
me, seeing that I'm gonna reach thesegoals by the dates that I want, right?
And really shifting that mindsetand that focus on what it is I want.
(13:01):
That's another point that I've saidbefore, and I'm gonna say it again, that
when you are manifesting or creatingstuff in your life that you don't
focus on what it is you don't want.
You don't focus on the part of wanting it.
You focus on already having it, knowingthat it's already here for you, and you
focus on what it is that you do want.
You don't focus on the factthat it's missing, right?
(13:22):
So if you're tellingyourself, I want this.
That's basically just reinforcing thatyou're always gonna be in a state of
wanting because you don't already have it.
You have to change that word, thatverbiage to, I have this, this
is for me, this is coming to me.
I see it coming for me.
I can see my future.
Right?
You think of your future self.
I saw recently, um, it might havebeen one of the girls in our coaching
group who talked about how they sawsomebody where their manifestation
(13:46):
technique or what they do for theirlike journaling process is they write
like things that they're grateful forright now, and then they write things
that they're grateful for for theirfuture self as if they already have it.
They're already grateful for itbecause they already have it, even
though it's something that they'rewanting to have in the future.
They're writing it as if they alreadyhave it and they're thankful for it,
and I love that idea and I think that'sa great process that you can utilize.
(14:08):
.So here's the thing.
Started doing these affirmations,these gratitudes, right?
Like seeing myself, achieving my goals.
The scale finally startedtrending downward.
And, last week I hit anew low and I can see it.
I'm gonna reach that firstgoal I set for myself.
I did not think it was gonna be possiblea few weeks ago when I was down in
that kind of pessimistic, discouragingmindset, like focusing on the lack, right?
(14:32):
But when I switched to that might ofabundance, when I switched to focusing on
what it is I want, when I started seeingfrom the end and knowing that I was gonna
get there and seeing what I wanted, right?
Like seeing that it was there for meand seeing that it was possible, right?
Like believing that it's possibleand holding onto that belief
in faith that it's coming.
(14:52):
Like I'm doing it.
It's happening.
I'm making progress.
I'm losing weight easilyand effortlessly, right?
So what's what's interesting too, so it'snot like I'm not doing the work, right?
And that's where it gets tricky, butit's like when you believe you are this
person and you see the thing that youwanna achieve or wanna be like that
future, when you start seeing yourselfas that's who you are or that's what
(15:13):
you wanna do, you naturally start doingthe things that that person is doing.
Do you see what I'm saying?
So when I see myself in that lowerfat percentage body, what is that
lower fat percentage body doing?
They are being more active.
They are not eating, um, somuch sweets excessively, right?
But it's like thisnatural thing that occurs.
I'm not punishing myself.
(15:34):
It's not something I'msuffering to get to my goals.
It's something that's naturally happeningbecause I see myself as that future
version of myself, and that's how I'mgonna act because that's how I see myself.
So this is kind of how this works.
It's not about you just like dreamyourself into getting the results.
You're still doing the work.
It's this subconscious thing thathappens in your mindset where you
start acting and behaving like thatperson you already wanna be, that
(15:56):
it's naturally occurring and that'show you're getting your results.
So, wow, the power of your mindand your self-talk and what you're
telling yourself is so importantand it applies to everything.
I don't care if you're trying to loseweight or not, or you've got other
things that are going on in your life.
Your mindset is what sets the tone.
Your mindset is whatchanges your perspective.
Your mindset is how you literallycan change your life because what you
(16:20):
tell yourself is how you see things.
It's how things are reflected back to you.
It's just, it's really crazy and I can usethis as an, another example that happened
to me recently too, is I was having.
A very poor attitude about a certainperson in my life you know, and I just
was like focused on all the things Ididn't like about the person and how they
were bothering me and just like gettingin that space where I was almost throwing
(16:41):
a pity party for myself because I wasjust having a bad attitude and just,
so frustrated, like, howcan I change this person?
And here's the thing is youcan't change other people.
People are gonna behave anddo what they're gonna do.
You can't do anything about it.
You're just have to let them be right.
But I can change me and I can change and,and realize what am I doing in my mind?
What am I focusing on?
and I switched that focus to justreally focusing on the things that
(17:02):
I do appreciate about that person.
What I do appreciate that they do.
And, and it was so crazy, like I'm talkingin a matter of minutes, switching my
focus, that my attitude changed, mypresence around the person changed.
I was not so like uptight and just, like kind of repelling myself and
like giving off that energy that Idon't wanna be around this person.
Like I was able to soften myselfand be more accepting and just
(17:22):
let that person be who they are.
And change my perspectiveon how I'm seeing that.
And then that made me feel better,right as I'm feeling better
and having a better attitude.
It just changes your whole like energyand your environment just by you
switching how you're perceiving things.
Because really, yourperception is your reality.
Like that really is thekey is how you see things.
That's how it is.
(17:42):
Right.
I'm gonna end it here, but I justreally want you guys to focus on.
How are you seeing things?
Like what are you telling yourselfthat might be keeping you stuck?
That might be keeping you in thisnegative spin on whatever situation it is?
Or maybe you do, maybe youare doing something or you're
trying to achieve something, oryou have a goal for yourself.
Like what is keeping youstuck or not seeing progress?
Is it your mindset?
(18:03):
Is it what you're telling yourself?
Are you beating yourself up?
. Like, stop that, right?
Like, I need to, I'mgonna check in with you.
Like my coach had to check in with me.
Stop that.
Cut it out.
Get yourself into a routine whereyou're talking to yourself lovingly,
where you're talking to yourselffrom your future self, right?
Like, what are the things that you want?
And then believe and stepinto that person, right?
Um, writing things down is a reallygreat way to shift things for yourself.
(18:26):
We just started a new challengewithin my, um, coaching group for
all the girls in the coaching group.
We are doing a 30 day challenge for themonth of March and a 30 days in April.
And for these first 30 days,we're focusing on habits.
And so the first three habits areour water intake goals, our step
goals, and a morning routine.
And then we got to pick twoto three of our own goals.
(18:48):
So for me, my morning routine, Thejournaling, my affirmations and gratitudes
and doing 10 minutes of reading,
like a self-development book or spiritualbook of some sort, you know, something
that's gonna, um, help gimme that.
positive mindset, that kind of thing.
And then, um, my water is a gallona day and my steps, it's only 8,500
a day, which isn't a whole lot,but some days that feels a lot.
(19:10):
Reaching my step goal.
And then walking for 20minutes, at least outside.
Um, so I'm about to go walk outside now.
It's a lot colder than I thoughtit was gonna be and a little bit
more drizzly, so that's a bummer.
But I'm still gonna go outside becausebeing outside is something that's
very, like soulful, I don't know how toexplain it, but just being outside is
just something that's good for my soul.
So I'm making it a point to challengemyself, no matter the weather, to get
(19:32):
outside for at least 20 minutes a day.
Um, and I've been doing that everyday since the 1st of March, so I'm
really excited to keep that going.
It's, and it's just, you know,when you start checking things off
for yourself, when you have goals,it's something that kinda helps you
self-motivate and it makes you feel good.
Keeps building that kind of momentumof positive energy, reinforcing
that motivation for yourself.
It's actually the action that , getsyou that motivation, right?
(19:52):
We always tend to think it's theother way around, but really it's the
action that propels the motivationthat keeps us to keep making the
action that propels the motivation.
So my advice for you, something that youcould do to start small, really, like,
easily, whether you do it at morning ornight or both, is just listing, you know,
three affirmations and three gratitudes.
When you're in a state of gratitude,like it just puts you in a
(20:13):
positive mindset and you alwayshave something to be thankful for.
I'm telling you.
The fact that you're alive andbreathing today, you are great.
. Be grateful for that, right?
There's something to be grateful for you.
It could be bare minimum.
I'm grateful that I havefood to feed myself today.
I am grateful that I have air to breathe.
I'm grateful that I have a place torest my head, things like that, right?
And then you can evenget into more in depth.
You know, I'm grateful, youknow, for friends and family.
(20:34):
I'm grateful for my physical body.
I'm grateful for theexperiences that come to me.
I'm grateful for unexpected blessings.
There's so many things that you canexpress gratitude for, but if you get
in the habit of listing three things.
You know, keep it small.
Three things either, you know, do itin the morning to set your mind right
or maybe at night before you go to bed.
So that's like what your mind'sfocused on is gratitude before
you rest your head, go to bed.
(20:54):
get in that habit of gratitudes.
And then also affirming who you wanna be.
Like, take a moment to really justwrite out who you wanna be in every
aspect like, paint this perfect pictureof who you would like to be, write it
out, and then step into that persona.
Right.
Like, you know, I always like this yearI told you, this is the year of stepping
into being the badass bitch that I am.
(21:15):
Right?
So step into that badass bitch versionof yourself and write that out.
Who is that badass bitchwithin you that you wanna be?
See that it's there and it's possibleand step into that persona, right?
It's like putting on a suit andyou're embodying that vision of
yourself and watch it come to life.
It's amazing when things start happening,when you really switch things, and
that's, that was the point of thisepisode, is to really show you the
magic that you have inside you when youswitch that mindset and that self-talk.
(21:39):
I really hope you guys are doing well.
Let me know if you try some of thesetricks, whether it's, you know, just doing
the little affirmations or gratitudes orwriting out that best ideal version of
yourself and, tell me what happens whenyou start stepping into that persona,
you put that on and you show up in theworld as you are who you wanna be, and
see how it starts morphing into that.
See how that starts creatingitself for you, right?
(22:00):
That manifestation comes to life.
I wanna see it.
I wanna hear your stories.
Please reach out to me.
You can find me on Facebook or Instagram.
My handle is @chelsea.vanbuskirk,or you can find me on my website
at chelseavanbuskirk.com andI'll see you guys next week.
Peace.
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