Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
(00:00):
So what is imposter syndrome and how do we overcome that? Well, imposter syndrome is the concept of telling people that you've done things when you haven't done them.
Unfiltered with Matt Farnsworth. 3 00:00:12,269.999 --> 00:00:13,080 You're pretending.
You're actually lying. 5 00:00:15,269.999 --> 00:00:21,719.999 So let's say in recovery, for example, you're telling people I've been sober for five years, but you had a drink last night. 6 00:00:21,829.999 --> 00:00:23,760 That's imposter syndrome.
(00:23):
You're pretending.
.9Let's say you want to want to start a business and you're pretending.
You're figuring out how to do that, but in the process, you're putting up social media posts that say, my marketing agency did 30, 000 last month.
.899No, it didn't. 11 00:00:38,724.999 --> 00:00:39,595 That didn't happen.
And in the process, you will learn nothing.
So the concept of imposter syndrome is it's viral.
(00:46):
So many people are doing it.
.999You see it all over social media, right? People saying, you know, my marketing agency is doing this. 16 00:00:51,614.999 --> 00:00:52,565 I can help you scale.
I can help you grow. 18 00:00:53,964.999 --> 00:00:56,955 There are a lot of scams out there.
People telling you they can help you do something.
That's going to make you wealthy, make you rich and make you look like them.
And all they're doing is going out and taking pictures of themselves in exotic locations. 22 00:01:08,315.1 --> 00:01:10,395 The backdrop is Monaco.
(01:10):
And they've got a car they've rented in front of them that's super expensive.
But when they're done at the end of the day, most of them, you know, end up driving back to a small apartment or a dingy Airbnb for the day and trying to be a pretender, an imposter in a life that they actually want. 25 00:01:27,489.999 --> 00:01:28,489.9995 They want that life. 26 00:01:28,489.9995 --> 00:01:32,610 They idealize that particular life and they want it.
(01:32):
They want to be viewed as that.
They want the attention.
And so the imposter comes out.
Now, that all stems from a deeper seated complication, something internally that says, I'm not good enough.
.999I could go down the rabbit hole of how I feel about imposter syndrome and why I could never do it.
(01:52):
My beliefs run deep.
.999So deep in the gospel that I could never pretend to do something or say, I've done something that I've never done. 34 00:02:03,635.099 --> 00:02:05,115 I couldn't do that.
Now, maybe at a time in my life I could have, and maybe there were times in my life that I was attempting to be an imposter. 36 00:02:12,204.999 --> 00:02:16,125 I believe, I believe there were times in my life I was, I tried, I was trying to be an actor.
(02:16):
I worked very hard at it, but I was an actor.
I did do it.
.999But I had an idea in my mind of who I thought I was going to be, and even in the aberrated mindset of imagining that you're going to be this particular superstar, it goes from an aspiration to idolizing. 40 00:02:38,39.999 --> 00:02:45,239.999 And then being an imposter and you see that all over social media before social media was big. 41 00:02:45,289.999 --> 00:02:47,699.999 That was pretty much what LA looked like. 42 00:02:47,769.999 --> 00:02:52,99.999 It was just imposter syndrome all over the place. 43 00:02:52,449.998 --> 00:02:56,399.999 I looked like somebody who could be potentially famous at the time I lived there. 44 00:02:56,679.998 --> 00:03:00,399.999 And so it was all eyeballs on you everywhere you went everywhere you drove. 45 00:03:01,189.999 --> 00:03:02,109.999 And it was strange. 46 00:03:02,129.999 --> 00:03:08,859.998 It was a strange feeling, but it also validated you in some way when you're needy and you're hungry for attention. 47 00:03:09,829.999 --> 00:03:16,79.999 It does fill that giant void, rather, that you have for a short period of time until you need it again. 48 00:03:16,879.999 --> 00:03:31,679.998 And so what fills that void entirely? What makes us whole? And how do we achieve being truthful, being ourselves, and most of all, being okay with it? And there are some steps you can take to do that. 49 00:03:31,759.998 --> 00:03:34,529.998 The first step is, you have to get honest with yourself. 50 00:03:35,69.998 --> 00:03:39,429.998 If you can't be honest, Then you're never going to have success. 51 00:03:40,9.998 --> 00:03:47,919.998 You're never going to be able to do the hard things that you need to do in order to be able to say that you've done those hard things and be authentic about it. 52 00:03:48,904.998 --> 00:03:49,664.998 It's impossible. 53 00:03:50,564.998 --> 00:03:53,44.998 So without honesty, you're stopped. 54 00:03:53,44.998 --> 00:03:53,734.998 You're stuck. 55 00:03:53,994.998 --> 00:03:55,154.998 You're not going to go anywhere. 56 00:03:55,234.998 --> 00:03:59,664.998 The second step would be having the intelligence and the wherewithal to brand yourself. 57 00:03:59,664.998 --> 00:04:06,144.998 To be able to speak about your experiences in an authentic way and make it relatable. 58 00:04:06,494.997 --> 00:04:10,964.898 Make it something that people can vibe with, get into, and be interested in. 59 00:04:11,804.998 --> 00:04:17,444.998 And the third thing you would need to do is you'd need to be able to get your message out there. 60 00:04:17,624.998 --> 00:04:24,114.998 Now, what I'm talking about here is, you know, people who want to build a business, they want to get their message out there. 61 00:04:24,114.998 --> 00:04:25,424.998 They want to build a personal brand. 62 00:04:25,804.998 --> 00:04:30,844.998 They want to have success in their life and they want to be able to sell whatever product or service that they do sell. 63 00:04:30,844.998 --> 00:04:36,524.998 Whether that's a small business, an entrepreneur, um, coaching, personal fitness, financial advisors. 64 00:04:36,774.998 --> 00:04:43,694.998 Whatever it may be that you do, you want to be able to sell, whether you're a plumber or a locksmith, you want to be able to sell your product. 65 00:04:43,694.998 --> 00:04:49,644.998 You're going to need to brand yourself personally in today's marketplace in order to Excel in whatever industry that you're working in. 66 00:04:50,454.998 --> 00:04:53,574.998 People are using social media to do this on a regular basis. 67 00:04:53,594.998 --> 00:05:00,984.998 And like I said, so many people are lying about what it is that they do, but you can read through that, right? You can see the difference. 68 00:05:01,394.998 --> 00:05:02,264.998 I know I can. 69 00:05:02,334.998 --> 00:05:10,304.997 I can tell when somebody is being unauthentic and it's so easy to go down the rabbit hole, click on the links that they have, and see. 70 00:05:10,959.998 --> 00:05:14,589.998 Hmm, through the lines and go, wow, that's, this doesn't look right. 71 00:05:14,629.998 --> 00:05:15,789.998 This seems to be a lie. 72 00:05:16,659.998 --> 00:05:20,179.9975 If you dig a little bit, you'll find that 95 percent of those people are lying to you. 73 00:05:20,179.9975 --> 00:05:24,519.997 But there are other people out there that are not lying and they do follow that first step. 74 00:05:25,289.998 --> 00:05:26,109.998 They tell the truth. 75 00:05:26,619.998 --> 00:05:30,989.998 And this goes in the same line with success and sobriety and everything that I always talk about. 76 00:05:31,69.998 --> 00:05:38,179.998 Success is just the idea that you're able to get real with yourself and be honest. 77 00:05:38,259.998 --> 00:05:45,659.998 And start working on something that is going to radically change your life by doing something different. 78 00:05:45,739.998 --> 00:05:47,399.997 It's a very easy concept. 79 00:05:47,679.998 --> 00:05:49,29.998 Do something different. 80 00:05:49,69.998 --> 00:05:50,199.998 Change what you're doing. 81 00:05:50,289.998 --> 00:05:51,99.998 It's dry. 82 00:05:51,109.998 --> 00:05:52,229.998 It's easy to do. 83 00:05:52,939.997 --> 00:05:58,829.998 But people don't often want to make any changes because change can be very uncomfortable. 84 00:05:58,909.998 --> 00:06:01,459.998 Being honest with yourself and saying, Hey, I'm a giant liar. 85 00:06:02,79.998 --> 00:06:03,979.998 Is not exactly what everybody wants to do. 86 00:06:04,789.998 --> 00:06:08,399.997 So the steps to really having success. 87 00:06:08,769.998 --> 00:06:18,789.998 Whether it be I want to get sober or I want to start a business is do the thing first do it and then second Show that you've done it. 88 00:06:18,869.998 --> 00:06:20,689.998 That's that's the ticket to success. 89 00:06:20,689.998 --> 00:06:29,784.998 It's really just two steps The first is to be honest get honest with yourself and then document that process That's what I've done over the years. 90 00:06:30,284.998 --> 00:06:35,514.998 I've documented the process of, of me becoming sober and me having success. 91 00:06:35,594.998 --> 00:06:57,554.998 I've gone from broke with nothing in my pocket, absolutely no money at all, a broken neck, medical bills, lawyer bills, a divorce, and just a terrible situation living in a residence in day to day, barely able to make it to, you know, making hundreds of thousands of dollars a year, starting my own companies. 92 00:06:57,634.998 --> 00:07:08,624.997 Having those companies look to be very, very successful creating content that people like being asked to go and speak about my story because I've shared it and I've helped to motivate people. 93 00:07:09,434.997 --> 00:07:18,904.996 And those were all goals that I only realized after, after I became sober enough to be honest and honesty is the key. 94 00:07:19,394.996 --> 00:07:22,484.997 Again, I go back to that every single time I speak. 95 00:07:23,284.997 --> 00:07:41,559.897 Unless you can be honest with yourself and say, I'm crazy, I've got a lot of complications, I have lied throughout my life, and we are all guilty of it, we all sin to some degree, nobody is perfect, only Christ, and with us, we are evil, fallen people, we are human beings and it is in our nature to lie. 96 00:07:42,439.997 --> 00:07:45,119.997 So you will have to fight that throughout your life. 97 00:07:45,409.997 --> 00:07:50,499.997 And if, if you want to have success, just stop the line, be real with yourself and move forward. 98 00:07:50,579.997 --> 00:07:51,189.996 That's the ticket. 99 00:07:51,189.997 --> 00:07:51,679.997 That's the key. 100 00:07:51,719.997 --> 00:07:56,29.996 If you can make your spiritual walk your top priority. 101 00:07:56,979.997 --> 00:08:03,499.997 You'll be able to stop lying, and in that you're going to find what makes you happy. 102 00:08:03,579.997 --> 00:08:10,159.997 And when you find what makes you happy, you'll be able to start creating the kind of life you want to create. 103 00:08:10,869.996 --> 00:08:16,809.998 And then you can say, I've done all these wonderful things, and here's how I did it. 104 00:08:16,889.998 --> 00:08:21,619.998 And whatever level of success comes to you, at least you know it's authentically earned. 105 00:08:22,109.998 --> 00:08:23,819.998 And I believe that's where happiness is. 106 00:08:24,659.998 --> 00:08:29,709.998 It's in truthfulness, authenticity, and hard work.
So what is imposter syndrome and how do we overcome that? Well, imposter syndrome is the concept of telling people that you've done things when you haven't done them.
Unfiltered with Matt Farnsworth. 3 00:00:12,269.999 --> 00:00:13,080 You're pretending.
You're actually lying. 5 00:00:15,269.999 --> 00:00:21,719.999 So let's say in recovery, for example, you're telling people I've been sober for five years, but you had a drink last night. 6 00:00:21,829.999 --> 00:00:23,760 That's imposter syndrome.
(00:23):
You're pretending.
.9Let's say you want to want to start a business and you're pretending.
You're figuring out how to do that, but in the process, you're putting up social media posts that say, my marketing agency did 30, 000 last month.
.899No, it didn't. 11 00:00:38,724.999 --> 00:00:39,595 That didn't happen.
And in the process, you will learn nothing.
So the concept of imposter syndrome is it's viral.
(00:46):
So many people are doing it.
.999You see it all over social media, right? People saying, you know, my marketing agency is doing this. 16 00:00:51,614.999 --> 00:00:52,565 I can help you scale.
I can help you grow. 18 00:00:53,964.999 --> 00:00:56,955 There are a lot of scams out there.
People telling you they can help you do something.
That's going to make you wealthy, make you rich and make you look like them.
And all they're doing is going out and taking pictures of themselves in exotic locations. 22 00:01:08,315.1 --> 00:01:10,395 The backdrop is Monaco.
(01:10):
And they've got a car they've rented in front of them that's super expensive.
But when they're done at the end of the day, most of them, you know, end up driving back to a small apartment or a dingy Airbnb for the day and trying to be a pretender, an imposter in a life that they actually want. 25 00:01:27,489.999 --> 00:01:28,489.9995 They want that life. 26 00:01:28,489.9995 --> 00:01:32,610 They idealize that particular life and they want it.
(01:32):
They want to be viewed as that.
They want the attention.
And so the imposter comes out.
Now, that all stems from a deeper seated complication, something internally that says, I'm not good enough.
.999I could go down the rabbit hole of how I feel about imposter syndrome and why I could never do it.
(01:52):
My beliefs run deep.
.999So deep in the gospel that I could never pretend to do something or say, I've done something that I've never done. 34 00:02:03,635.099 --> 00:02:05,115 I couldn't do that.
Now, maybe at a time in my life I could have, and maybe there were times in my life that I was attempting to be an imposter. 36 00:02:12,204.999 --> 00:02:16,125 I believe, I believe there were times in my life I was, I tried, I was trying to be an actor.
(02:16):
I worked very hard at it, but I was an actor.
I did do it.
.999But I had an idea in my mind of who I thought I was going to be, and even in the aberrated mindset of imagining that you're going to be this particular superstar, it goes from an aspiration to idolizing. 40 00:02:38,39.999 --> 00:02:45,239.999 And then being an imposter and you see that all over social media before social media was big. 41 00:02:45,289.999 --> 00:02:47,699.999 That was pretty much what LA looked like. 42 00:02:47,769.999 --> 00:02:52,99.999 It was just imposter syndrome all over the place. 43 00:02:52,449.998 --> 00:02:56,399.999 I looked like somebody who could be potentially famous at the time I lived there. 44 00:02:56,679.998 --> 00:03:00,399.999 And so it was all eyeballs on you everywhere you went everywhere you drove. 45 00:03:01,189.999 --> 00:03:02,109.999 And it was strange. 46 00:03:02,129.999 --> 00:03:08,859.998 It was a strange feeling, but it also validated you in some way when you're needy and you're hungry for attention. 47 00:03:09,829.999 --> 00:03:16,79.999 It does fill that giant void, rather, that you have for a short period of time until you need it again. 48 00:03:16,879.999 --> 00:03:31,679.998 And so what fills that void entirely? What makes us whole? And how do we achieve being truthful, being ourselves, and most of all, being okay with it? And there are some steps you can take to do that. 49 00:03:31,759.998 --> 00:03:34,529.998 The first step is, you have to get honest with yourself. 50 00:03:35,69.998 --> 00:03:39,429.998 If you can't be honest, Then you're never going to have success. 51 00:03:40,9.998 --> 00:03:47,919.998 You're never going to be able to do the hard things that you need to do in order to be able to say that you've done those hard things and be authentic about it. 52 00:03:48,904.998 --> 00:03:49,664.998 It's impossible. 53 00:03:50,564.998 --> 00:03:53,44.998 So without honesty, you're stopped. 54 00:03:53,44.998 --> 00:03:53,734.998 You're stuck. 55 00:03:53,994.998 --> 00:03:55,154.998 You're not going to go anywhere. 56 00:03:55,234.998 --> 00:03:59,664.998 The second step would be having the intelligence and the wherewithal to brand yourself. 57 00:03:59,664.998 --> 00:04:06,144.998 To be able to speak about your experiences in an authentic way and make it relatable. 58 00:04:06,494.997 --> 00:04:10,964.898 Make it something that people can vibe with, get into, and be interested in. 59 00:04:11,804.998 --> 00:04:17,444.998 And the third thing you would need to do is you'd need to be able to get your message out there. 60 00:04:17,624.998 --> 00:04:24,114.998 Now, what I'm talking about here is, you know, people who want to build a business, they want to get their message out there. 61 00:04:24,114.998 --> 00:04:25,424.998 They want to build a personal brand. 62 00:04:25,804.998 --> 00:04:30,844.998 They want to have success in their life and they want to be able to sell whatever product or service that they do sell. 63 00:04:30,844.998 --> 00:04:36,524.998 Whether that's a small business, an entrepreneur, um, coaching, personal fitness, financial advisors. 64 00:04:36,774.998 --> 00:04:43,694.998 Whatever it may be that you do, you want to be able to sell, whether you're a plumber or a locksmith, you want to be able to sell your product. 65 00:04:43,694.998 --> 00:04:49,644.998 You're going to need to brand yourself personally in today's marketplace in order to Excel in whatever industry that you're working in. 66 00:04:50,454.998 --> 00:04:53,574.998 People are using social media to do this on a regular basis. 67 00:04:53,594.998 --> 00:05:00,984.998 And like I said, so many people are lying about what it is that they do, but you can read through that, right? You can see the difference. 68 00:05:01,394.998 --> 00:05:02,264.998 I know I can. 69 00:05:02,334.998 --> 00:05:10,304.997 I can tell when somebody is being unauthentic and it's so easy to go down the rabbit hole, click on the links that they have, and see. 70 00:05:10,959.998 --> 00:05:14,589.998 Hmm, through the lines and go, wow, that's, this doesn't look right. 71 00:05:14,629.998 --> 00:05:15,789.998 This seems to be a lie. 72 00:05:16,659.998 --> 00:05:20,179.9975 If you dig a little bit, you'll find that 95 percent of those people are lying to you. 73 00:05:20,179.9975 --> 00:05:24,519.997 But there are other people out there that are not lying and they do follow that first step. 74 00:05:25,289.998 --> 00:05:26,109.998 They tell the truth. 75 00:05:26,619.998 --> 00:05:30,989.998 And this goes in the same line with success and sobriety and everything that I always talk about. 76 00:05:31,69.998 --> 00:05:38,179.998 Success is just the idea that you're able to get real with yourself and be honest. 77 00:05:38,259.998 --> 00:05:45,659.998 And start working on something that is going to radically change your life by doing something different. 78 00:05:45,739.998 --> 00:05:47,399.997 It's a very easy concept. 79 00:05:47,679.998 --> 00:05:49,29.998 Do something different. 80 00:05:49,69.998 --> 00:05:50,199.998 Change what you're doing. 81 00:05:50,289.998 --> 00:05:51,99.998 It's dry. 82 00:05:51,109.998 --> 00:05:52,229.998 It's easy to do. 83 00:05:52,939.997 --> 00:05:58,829.998 But people don't often want to make any changes because change can be very uncomfortable. 84 00:05:58,909.998 --> 00:06:01,459.998 Being honest with yourself and saying, Hey, I'm a giant liar. 85 00:06:02,79.998 --> 00:06:03,979.998 Is not exactly what everybody wants to do. 86 00:06:04,789.998 --> 00:06:08,399.997 So the steps to really having success. 87 00:06:08,769.998 --> 00:06:18,789.998 Whether it be I want to get sober or I want to start a business is do the thing first do it and then second Show that you've done it. 88 00:06:18,869.998 --> 00:06:20,689.998 That's that's the ticket to success. 89 00:06:20,689.998 --> 00:06:29,784.998 It's really just two steps The first is to be honest get honest with yourself and then document that process That's what I've done over the years. 90 00:06:30,284.998 --> 00:06:35,514.998 I've documented the process of, of me becoming sober and me having success. 91 00:06:35,594.998 --> 00:06:57,554.998 I've gone from broke with nothing in my pocket, absolutely no money at all, a broken neck, medical bills, lawyer bills, a divorce, and just a terrible situation living in a residence in day to day, barely able to make it to, you know, making hundreds of thousands of dollars a year, starting my own companies. 92 00:06:57,634.998 --> 00:07:08,624.997 Having those companies look to be very, very successful creating content that people like being asked to go and speak about my story because I've shared it and I've helped to motivate people. 93 00:07:09,434.997 --> 00:07:18,904.996 And those were all goals that I only realized after, after I became sober enough to be honest and honesty is the key. 94 00:07:19,394.996 --> 00:07:22,484.997 Again, I go back to that every single time I speak. 95 00:07:23,284.997 --> 00:07:41,559.897 Unless you can be honest with yourself and say, I'm crazy, I've got a lot of complications, I have lied throughout my life, and we are all guilty of it, we all sin to some degree, nobody is perfect, only Christ, and with us, we are evil, fallen people, we are human beings and it is in our nature to lie. 96 00:07:42,439.997 --> 00:07:45,119.997 So you will have to fight that throughout your life. 97 00:07:45,409.997 --> 00:07:50,499.997 And if, if you want to have success, just stop the line, be real with yourself and move forward. 98 00:07:50,579.997 --> 00:07:51,189.996 That's the ticket. 99 00:07:51,189.997 --> 00:07:51,679.997 That's the key. 100 00:07:51,719.997 --> 00:07:56,29.996 If you can make your spiritual walk your top priority. 101 00:07:56,979.997 --> 00:08:03,499.997 You'll be able to stop lying, and in that you're going to find what makes you happy. 102 00:08:03,579.997 --> 00:08:10,159.997 And when you find what makes you happy, you'll be able to start creating the kind of life you want to create. 103 00:08:10,869.996 --> 00:08:16,809.998 And then you can say, I've done all these wonderful things, and here's how I did it. 104 00:08:16,889.998 --> 00:08:21,619.998 And whatever level of success comes to you, at least you know it's authentically earned. 105 00:08:22,109.998 --> 00:08:23,819.998 And I believe that's where happiness is. 106 00:08:24,659.998 --> 00:08:29,709.998 It's in truthfulness, authenticity, and hard work.
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