Hour 1: The Rules Have Changed

This is the gentle beginning of what happens when the rules change; when any behavior is permissible in the pursuit of what you want. Speakeasies and Cuban cigars. Habu sake.

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:10):
Is the Jesse Kelly Show. Let's have some fun on
a Tuesday. It is a Tuesday, and well, we're gonna
have a little bit of a roller coaster ride today.
Walk with me as we go through a roller coaster ride.
We have to talk about the firebombing of an anti
abortion clinic. Didn't hear about that yet, did you? We

(00:32):
have to talk about speak easies, why I want to
go to one, and why there aren't any good ones anymore.
Apparently New Yorkers are mad about that. We have to
talk about Elon must thinking someone's going to kill him.
He's probably right. We have violence from the left, suppose
that violence from the right, and even Star Trek has

(00:52):
been ruined all that. It would probably do some history tonight,
just because I'm gonna mood on The Jesse Kelly Show.
Before we get to any of that, though, I had
a friend visit me. This was a couple of years ago.
He doesn't listen to the show, so I'm comfortable say
telling this story and not using his name. But I

(01:16):
was friends with this guy during my childhood kind of
high school years and we were very very close. He
visits me, just hang with me a minute, comes to
visit me. He's since gotten himself married and he has
a couple of kids, actually two boys, almost identical to
the age of my boys. And he's only in town

(01:36):
for a night. So I do what I never do,
and I allow him to stay the night at my house.
He was on some financial hard time, So look, the
Kellys don't stay with anybody, and we don't want anyone
staying with us. That's how the Kellys are, That's how
I grew up. It doesn't matter, it doesn't matter he
stays the night. My boys are excited. Boys for some reason,
are always excited about a new set of boys. Oh sweet,
we'll get dirty with someone else. And I've never been

(02:01):
more horrified in my life because my friend is he
steal my friend and his wife, lovely woman, lovely woman.
Their kids are monsters. And I'm talking about the kind
of kids where she says, hey, don't spill that on
their floor, because of course the kid was spilling something
on the floor. Not a big deal, it's the floor.

(02:21):
That's what kids do. And he said, shut up, mom.
I'm looking at my buddy, thinking to myself, both my
sons would be dead if they talked to their mother
that way, and he lowers his head and just kind
of shakes his head, like those kids. That was one
of several things they did that night. Don't drink that soda.

(02:44):
I will if I want to. You're stupid. And I
remember going to bed that night, laying down with the
old lady, not to bragg or anything like that. What
Chris laying down with the old lady and saying, Oh
my gosh, those kids are and I'm very angry. I'm
angry on behalf of the kids, on behalf of my buddy.

(03:05):
I'm like, how does that happen? And she says, well,
I'm horrified too, But you have to understand, those are
the rules that have been set for the children in
the home. So don't be mad at the kids for
playing by those rules. Now, what's this have to do
with politics. Let's just have to do with what we're
doing today. Well, I know you've seen the video. You've

(03:28):
undoubtedly heard people talking about it all day, about the
protests in front of the Supreme Court, justices Holmes, about
the fact sam Alito has reportedly been moved to an
undisclosed location, and it just got me thinking about parents
and kids in societies, in rules and actually it made

(03:51):
me take a little trip down memory lane. Do you
remember last summer when the Antifa slash Black Lives Matter
animals begin and burning down major American cities. We have never,
just so you understand, we have never, at any point
in the history of the United States of America had
sustained rioting like that in that many different locations. Obviously

(04:12):
there have been big civil unrest places like Watts and whatnot,
never in that many different locations have we had such organized, sustained,
costly riots. And do you remember do you remember how
the American media covered it? In case you forgot, let's
take a walk down memory lane. I want to be
clear and how I chater is mostly a protest. It

(04:33):
is not generally speaking unruly. That ain't a riot. What
we're seeing right now in Minneapolis was they are strictly
principled anti fascists, and they've taken a principal stand to
stand against white supremacists and white nationalists wherever they may
show up. I argue to you tonight, all punches are
not equal morally. It says it right in the name Antifa,

(04:56):
anti fascism, which is what they were there fighting. Let's
and there's you know, no organization is perfect. There or
some violence. Any reasonable person would say we shouldn't be
destroying other people's property. But these are not reasonable times.
I just want to let you know that goes on
for another minute. I may play you the full cut
later on in the show. But I love the sound
of my own voice so much. Shut up, Chris, I

(05:17):
had to cut in. Do you remember do you remember
you probably remember this Chuck Schumer, obviously somebody who's gonna
be familiar to you, New York Senator Chuck Schumer. Do
you remember when he got up and he said this.
I want to tell you, gor Zuch I want to
tell you Kavanaugh. Okay, really quickly, can we talk about
Chuck Schumer's voice, Mother of God? All right? Anyway, I

(05:39):
want to tell you gor Zuch. I want to tell
you Kavanaugh, you have released the whirlwind and you will
pay the price. You won't know what hit you if
you go forward with these awful decisions. Okay, all right,
here's CNN's Laura Jarrett talking about protests out in front

(06:02):
of Supreme Court justice's homes. And I do need to
clarify something really quickly. It's against the law. Actually to
protest in front of a Supreme Court justice's home. It's
against the law. You can actually do a year in
jail for it because it's the attempted intimidation of a justice.
It's against the law. Here's Laura Jarrett on CNN, and
this is a question about civility. The frustration people feel

(06:24):
is personal. But where's the line? Obviously, what we see
the apparent arson at an anti abortion nonprofit in Wisconsin
is over the line. Violence is always over the line,
but they're real questions and conversation today about protests outside
Supreme Court justices houses, correctly justice capital, where do you
think that line is? I think for a lot of people,

(06:46):
a conversation about civility feels like it misses the mark
when constitutional rights that you believe that you had for
over fifty years are about to be overturned. The justices
have security. So far, all the protests have seemed overwhelmingly
non violent. There are plenty of protests that happen every
single day in this country around the country at a

(07:08):
boarding Okay, all right, so that's them defending it all right? Now,
Where am I going with this? Back to my buddies, kids,
my buddies kids are monsters. I'm sure they're twice as
bad now. My buddies kids are monsters because they have
that culture in their home. Remember, culture is just what
is incentivized, and what is this incentivized. The truth is

(07:29):
yelling shut up mom, and their home it does get
you that candy bar you want, and my home it
gets you a death sentence. Therefore, my kids never say
shut up mom. Their kids say shut up mom all
the time. We have changed something in the United States
of America, and I don't think everyone fully appreciates what

(07:51):
we have changed yet, and it's not changed for the better. Nevertheless,
it is already changed. We are already there, the kids,
you me, all of US American civilians, citizens. We now
view political protests differently than we did even three or
four years ago. We now have a new set of

(08:14):
rules in this country where anything and everything is starting
to get more and more acceptable. The effort to purge
the country of Donald Trump created in this country a
new set of rules. When's the last time, before the

(08:36):
last year or so, you saw the right show up
and get loud at school boards? You see it now?
Have you ever heard of a Supreme Court opinion leaking early.
Let me let me spoil it for you. Know you
haven't because it's never happened, and then seeing organized protests
at their home so bad one of them had to
be whisked away to an undisclosed location. No, of course

(08:57):
you haven't. I have news for you, and this is
probably going to hurt a little bit, but I do
have news. We are not at some low point in
the country where we have reached the bottom. I've heard
people say this, all right, well, this is the we've
reached the bedrock. Ah man, this is the This is

(09:19):
as bad as it gets. This is but the gentle
beginning of what happens when the rules change. I am
not trying to scare you, and I know we're gonna
have fun. Look, hey, we're gonna have fun. Next we're
gonna talk about speakeasies and stuff. So just hang with me.
But we are in a different era now. We are

(09:41):
in an era now where anything and everything has become
permissible in the pursuit of what you want. It has
for the left, and therefore that is now transferred to
the right. The Press Secretary herself still won't condemn them
opportunity to actually prophivid protest outside and private residence, even

(10:03):
when peacefully. I'm wondering if any sort of demonetrations outside
of private homes might run all up that law. And
we're certainly not suggesting anyone break any laws. I would
note that the president's view has long been and I
tweeted this earlier this morning and repeated, and we're not saying. Look,
we're not saying to break any laws. But if people

(10:24):
are passionate, people are passionate. We are entering a different
era in this country and it is not going to
be gentle and it is not going to be good.
But there is no stopping it. Now, well, I should
say there's almost no stopping it. There's one thing that
could change that. There's one thing that could stop where
we're going. You want to know what that is, I'll

(10:46):
tell you in just a moment before we get to that.
Just know that I'm back. I see in a second.
He doesn't care if you believe him, but he's right.
Jesse Kelly was logan Yes The Jesse Kelly Show on

(11:07):
a Tuesday. Don't forget. You can email the show Jesse
at Jesse Kelly Show dot com, Jesse at Jesse Kelly
Show dot com. Your love, your hate, your death threats,
everything is welcome. We're an equal opportunity show around here, Chris.
I know people think I'm not what we are. We're
equal opportunity. That's because I am such a good person.

(11:30):
Unlike you, Chris. I am all right. So what I
was talking about. The rules have changed. They're changing rapidly.
We haven't hit some bottom yet, not even close. The
charity that's supposed to abortion is being investigated as arson.
The words if abortions aren't safe, then you aren't either.
We're spray painted on the walls of this office in
Wisconsin before the building was set on fire with Molotov cocktails.

(11:54):
They fire bombed an abortion, anti abortion office in Wisconsin.
It's not the end either. This is the beginning. This
is the beginning of a society separating and separating violently,
and I do not believe it can be stopped unless
one thing happens. And I think this is very very

(12:16):
very unlikely. The only thing that could prevent us continuing
to descend down this rabbit hole of nastiness. That's a
good you know what, Chris, that's a good thing. Rabbit hole,
what rabbit hole of nastiness. That's you would never come
up with that. I just came up with that live
on the air. That's not a very nice finger, Chris.
That's whatever. Anyway, as we continue to descend down this

(12:38):
rabbit hole of nastiness, the only thing that can stop
it is actually nothing the government can do aimed at
the people. The government must reform itself. And I realize
that sounds impossible and ridiculous, but if you want to
really stop where we're going in this country, we will

(13:01):
have a government agency of some kind. I'm sure we
already have plenty in existence, if not create a new one,
dedicate itself wholeheartedly to a transparent public, drastic reformation of
the federal government, especially things like the Department of Justice,

(13:22):
the Federal Bureau of Investigation. Because what's happening now, the
reason we're on this never ending downhill spiral now isn't
necessarily just because of the communists and how violent and
vile and nasty they are. We're heading this way now
because the right no longer believes the traditional things that

(13:43):
thought was on its side are on its side anymore.
The right rightfully, man, That actually is not a good
way to put that the right rightfully doesn't believe the
Federal Bureau of Investigation is interested in digging into all
these far left wing violent organizations. And they've admitted as

(14:04):
much FBI, Black Lives Matter ANTIFA, Hey, FBI, what are
you doing about that? Member? They added hearing and they said, oh,
I mean, we don't. We're not really doing anything about it.
The right does, however, continue to hear things like this.
Capital police are warning the far right is calling for
violence against a religious group planning to rally for abortion rights.

(14:25):
Whitney Wild is live outside the Supreme Court. Listen seeing
fences go up there. It's sort of like post January six,
what are you seeing and what specific intelligence is warring
if police officials, well, at this point, law enforcement sources,
several of them tell us if they are closely monitoring
social media chatter that suggests that there's a potential for
violence against abortion clinic providers, abortion clinic staff, members of

(14:48):
the judiciary that would include the justices here as well
as members of the federal government. They're very worried about
that right wing violence out there. What I'm trying to
say is we're descending because the right no longer believes
they have any official legal recourse. And if you deny
people justice by traditional means, people will seek justice by

(15:13):
non traditional means. That is not me cheering for it.
That is me saying, beyond the shadow of a doubt,
people seek justice, you give it to them through traditional means,
althy'll find it other ways. I mean, I've brought this
up before. It's going to sound like I'm changing the subject,

(15:34):
and I guess in a way i am. But coronavirus,
our coronavirus lockdown policies, they're not just launching America, they're
launching the world into I mean, let's be frank, recession
is now a given that's coming. We are potentially facing
a depression, a gigantic global depression, depression, and it's because

(15:54):
of COVID lockdown policies. Where's the accountability people out there?
People listening to the sound of my voice right now,
they're wiped out across the country. They've lost loved ones,
they've lost businesses. We now have this new thing out
sixty minutes, even though it's garbage. They're doing something out

(16:16):
there about the teenage girl suicide epidemic. According to the
CDC Hospital of Missions data shows the number of teenage
girls who have been suicidal has increased fifty percent nationwide
since twenty nine. Fifty percent nation wide. I cut that
off a little early, but it was since twenty nineteen.

(16:36):
People are looking around right now, someone listening to the
sound of my voice lost their child to suicide during
the last two years, or almost lost them. I know,
because you write me emails and that parent justifiably wants
to know what's going to be done to this person.
It wasn't until early February when I was in a

(16:58):
meeting that experts of the Foundation said, there's no way,
you know, there's been too much travel without diagnosis for
us to contain this. And then at that point we
didn't really understand the fatality rate, you know, we didn't
understand that it's a fairly low fatality rate, and that

(17:20):
it's a diseased mainly of the elderly, kind of like fluids,
although a bit different than that. So that was pretty
scary period. I wasn't scared, and I knew exactly what
it was because I had eyes. You're telling me, big
fancy smart Bill Gates didn't and that human being and
Fauci and State governments and federal governments and public health
officials destroyed people. Where's the justice for people? Where's the accounting,

(17:45):
where's the reckoning? We are descending into a dark period
in this country because there is no longer any accountability
ever for these people who ritually abuse the public. And
if you don't ever hold them accountable, well, there's a
shelf life on that. And once that shelf life expires,

(18:08):
once that expiration date gets there, once the people have
had enough, then it gets horrible and ugly. And I
don't want that. If we want to avoid that, we'll
do something. Now it's time to talk about speakeasies in
New York. Why aren't they taken off? I'll explain it

(18:40):
is the Jesse Kelly Show, Chris, what is this erosion
to conformity? What is it? Corrosion to conformity? That was weird?
I don't know what I look, I'm up in the
air on whether I like it or not. I would
need more. All right, hang on, let me get some
gym beam and then we'll work this out. All right,

(19:00):
hang on, you know, before we get to the speakeasy,
let's just once let's check in. Let's check in for
a brief moment, and let's see how well the uh,
the psychopass who love abortion. Let's see how well they're
handling things. This is a real person. Yeah, okay, we're

(19:31):
doing well here, doing well. I'm a little creeped out,
all right, And it's the Jesse Kelly Show. I remember
you can email the show Jesse at Jesse Kelly show
dot com. Speakeasies. First of all, let's do a little
rewind here. The headline is this speak easies are hot,
but jaded New Yorkers say they aren't the real thing.

(19:51):
Let's let's pause for a moment in rewind. Way back
in the day in the United States of America, some
genius decided that we should ban alcohol. Ban alcohol, and
they did it. They actually passed an amendment. There was
so much support for this, they passed an amendment to

(20:11):
the Constitution to ban alcohol. Obviously, that was insane and
that was never going to work, and people begin to
find ways to circumvent the law. One of those ways
was a speake easy. Now, I've been to fake speakeasies before,
but a speakeasy essentially was a hidden bar. It's not

(20:34):
more complicated than that. There's a hidden bar Why why
aren't they Why aren't they taking off anymore? Let's let's
pause for a brief moment and we'll come back to that.
You know, I don't talk about this very much, mainly
because anybody whoever starts to eat healthier or work out more,

(20:55):
their first inclination is to tell you about it. And
it is the worst thing in the world. You can't
walk within fifteen feet of somebody who's dieting or on
a new workout program without them telling you what it is.
So I'm not doing that. But for the purpose of
my story, I have to let you know started a

(21:16):
new workout program a couple weeks ago. Shut up, Chris,
It's going very well, going very well. Look, I don't
want I don't want to brag, but I'm getting pretty big,
all right, getting pretty big? Then, in all serious has
start a new workout program a couple weeks ago and
told the wife that I'm going to start making improvements

(21:36):
on the diet. To stay with me, this is going
to apply. I'm gonna start making improvements on the diet. Look,
I'm never going to eat kale kale salads or whatever weodo,
crap cheese, eating no I'm gonna stick with meat of
some kind and lots of cheese. But I'm gonna make improvements.
And I have made improvements. Has it been Look, if

(21:57):
you witnessed my diet, would you think that's an improvement
over something? Probably not. Nevertheless, it is an improvement. I've
made improvements today. Actually, as we speak, I did something
I've never done before. Me Chris Michael. We're here at
the studio. We're loan. There's a cookie delivery service in

(22:21):
my area. They deliver these gigantic cookies and they're glorious.
They're made fresh, and that's their business model. They make
these huge, perfect cookies and they deliver them. I just
ordered these cookies and I ordered them delivered to the
studio for me and the fellas to feast on. And
I'm so excited about it. Why because it's forbidden. It's

(22:50):
not just because they're cookies. It's because they're forbidden. Look,
you can call it the fallen part of human nature,
and undoubtedly it is. But the truth is the human
mind wants, at least part of it wants what it's
not allowed to have. You can create as many fake

(23:12):
speakeasies in New York as you want, and you can
have people dressed up in nineteen twenties attire, and they do,
and you can have these speakeasies. They're actually cool, Chris,
you'd enjoy them. Where you need to have the password
before they let you in. I mean, it's straight out
of the movies where you you knock on this kind
of nondescript or you have to know where it is,

(23:34):
and they'll open up the slot. What's the password? And
of course you end up getting the password if you
know some people in New York, as I do. And
it's fun and it's fine. It's not better than the
dive bar up the road, though, why because it's not
forbidden anymore. It's not forbidden. You can't have the speak

(23:57):
easy unless you aren't constantly given even the door a
little bit of the side eye, wondering if the NYPD's
gonna bang down the door and throw everyone in cuffs. What, Chris,
what if they had Cubans in there? I like Cubans.
Cuban chicks are dimes. All cigars, oh, I mean know

(24:20):
those even really that illegal? Who a Cuban city? You
know what Cuban cigars are. Cuban cigars are the thing
law abiding citizen guy. It's the thing he does to
feel like an outlaw. The guy who works forty fifty
hours a Week's he works forty fifty hours a week,

(24:42):
putting food on the table, keep keeping clothes on, his
kids back his old lady's got some fresh flowers every
now and then. He drives a ten year old car.
He's the definition of responsible right. Ten percent every single
month goes to his investment portfolio. But he just wants
to feel like a Hell's angel for one day, so

(25:02):
he gets some Cubans. Have I ever smoked a Cuban? Yeah, Chris,
I have a couple of the house right now. Are
they better? No? Absolutely not. They taste better because they're forbidden.
It's funny you brought up cubans. I have a buddy
and me and I've actually had this argument before because
he has a line on some Cubans and he gets
them regularly. And what I don't. I'm not a huge

(25:23):
cigar guy, but I'll puff on a cigar, especially if
I'm at a party of some kind where everyone's smoking
cigarettes or something like that. I'll enjoy a cigar. Or
if I'm out golf it or something like that I'll
enjoy a cigar. And I've had Cubans, and every time
I have one, every single time, I like that bad
boy up and I think, man, this is going to
be so much better than those other cigars I've had.

(25:48):
And every time I'll honestly, the first puff or tooth
tastes like it. It's oh man, you can watch to
see why these are forbidden. They're not better. Do you
realize after a few puffs it's the same same thing
you've been puffing on over and over again. So sorry,
New York, you're mad that speakeasies aren't quite don't quite

(26:08):
have the spice they used to. You need to ban
alcohol if you want them to have the spice. That look, hey,
if you're listening to me in New York City right now,
isn't life spicy enough? All right? That reminds me. Did
I ever tell you about my illegal bar story in Okinawa? Chris? Oh,

(26:29):
I've never all right. I think it's probably been a while.
Maybe you forgot because you're stupid, So I had all right,
let me explain something here before I get into my story.
And yes, I'm gonna get back to all the politics
here and all the abortion stuff and Supreme Chords stuff,
and Ukraine is back in the news and there's something
you creepy there, and Chuck Todd's getting fired and all

(26:50):
kinds of other great stuff. But before you get to that,
Before we get to that, I'm gonna talk first about me,
what Chris, I'm gonna talk about me. When I was
in the Marines, we would do and I still think
this is something they do, but I don't know. The
whole combat Iraq Afghanistan thing. I know screwed this up
a lot. We would do six months deployments overseas before

(27:13):
there was combat. You just go and I've told you
this before. The one I did before Iraq kicked off,
which screwed up my second one, dang it. The one
I did was Okaawa and we went to an illegal
bar there and I threw up. And I'll explain exactly
what happened in just a moment. Before I get to that,
we were just talking about how skizy and nasty the

(27:34):
world is, how dangerous it is. That's not going to change.
I mean, I opened up the show talking about how
we are descending. We don't have to celebrate it. Sure
you're not happy we do have to be prepared though, right,
do you have a Hero gun yet? Does your wife?
Does your husband? Does? Your mom? Who lives alone? Now

(27:58):
that daughter you sent off to college? Do they have
Hero guns? It's a non lethal gun. I don't want
to hear any Oh, they're not a gun guy, she's
not a gun girl. No, I don't want to hear
any excuses. This is a non lethal gun. It might
save your life or the life of the person you
love the most. Shoots a pepperball one hundred miles per hour.
It'll stop someone in their tracks when this thing explodes
on them. Trust me on that. Anyone can use it. Anyone.

(28:20):
It's got a laser sight. You point and squeeze. It's
that easy. You don't need some fancy concealed carry permits.
And there's a discount code you get a discount. Go
to Hero twenty twenty dot com and use the code
Jesse and that gets you a special discount Hero twenty
twenty dot com code Jesse. Oh God, an animally side

(28:42):
on me. Jesse Kelly, don't listening to the Jesse Kelly Show.
It is the Jesse Kelly Show. And no Chris, no
care oky for me. I don't want Look, I'm so
multi talented. I don't want to show off my voice. Chris, Now,

(29:06):
in all seriousness, I have the worst voice we Kelly's.
By the way, it's the Jesse Kelly Show. You can
email the show Jesse at Jesse Kelly show dot com.
I'm gonna go on to my story here. In just
a moment, we were talking about the forbidden and speakeasies
in New York and whatnot. But just really briefly, the
Kellys don't have any real artistic talent, and I mean

(29:28):
nobody in the family. We're a bit more of a
construction russ spelt type family. It's no Chris, I didn't
say I wasn't talented. Okay, all right. I finished in
the top two thirds of my high school class. I'll
have you know. I'm uber talented. The point is the
Kellys don't sing, they don't draw, they don't play musical instruments,

(29:51):
they don't dance. We don't have any of those abilities.
The wife, the wife won't even dance with me anymore.
You know what she says. It's like telling me this
isn't rude. She says, it's like dancing with a grizzly bear.
That's not very nice, she says. She accuses me, Chris,
of trying to take charge only not knowing what I'm doing.
That doesn't sound like me at all. That doesn't say. Look,

(30:13):
I'm gonna reject that. I reject that. All right, shut up,
back to my story. We're gonna get back to all
the politics here in a minute. Okinawa Marines. We go
over there for a six month deployment. And I've told
you this before. Whenever you would go somewhere or be
in the close proximity of somewhere in the Marines, they

(30:34):
would give you a list, a list of things of
places you weren't allowed to go, and they would give
you the addresses, the names and addresses. I still remember it.
It was amazing, Hey don't go here, here, here, and here.
Well again, this is the Marines. You might as have
just drive us there and drop us, drop us off.
We go out one night and we are legally enjoying

(30:55):
ourselves in Okinawa. We were, we were on the up
and up. And then a couple cups of courage later
for the fellas and we decide we should definitely go
check out one of those places. Now ran because of course,
that's when you want to go check out. And remember,
some of these places were dangerous. Some of them were
drug hubs, some of them were known to be organized

(31:16):
crime hubs of the various Japanese Oh exactly, Chris, Well again,
you might as well just take me right to the
organized crime bar, because that's where I want to go. Anyway, Hey,
are there any gangsters in here? Kind of a thing
we go, We show up outside of this place and
it's it's just like something you would imagine in your mind.

(31:37):
We're on some street, some kind of side street in Okinawa,
and you have to go not in a front door,
not in a door, and then up some stairs to
a second floor bar. You have to go off the
sidewalk and go down these rocky stairs, and then you
have to knock on the door. They open it up,
and they decide whether or not they're gonna let you in,

(31:58):
and they let us in, and I'll I don't think
I've ever had so much fun in my entire life.
One the place was full of criminals. But we look,
we thought we were okay. There's three or four infantry marines.
We look, we probably had way more confidence than we
needed to have at the moment. So we go in
and we're partying it up and on the stage, I've

(32:18):
never broken the rule. That's turned out so well in
my life. On the stage was the greatest band I've
ever seen in a bar. Now, the band itself was
probably just above average, but they had some guy. He
was Japanese Jimmy Hendrix. I'm not even kidding. He had
this long hair and like the stuff Jimmie Hendricks to do.

(32:40):
You know how Jimmie Hendricks would pick up the guitar
and play it with his tongue and play play it well,
I don't mean just strumming on. He would play it
with his tongue. That was this guy. And he was
shreddned to Jimmy Hendrix songs all night long. And of
course we were getting along with all the gangsters that
everyone's buying everybody drinks and stuff like that, and it

(33:00):
was so much fun right up until a certain point.
You know what habu saki is. You don't know what
that is, Chris, I would not recommend you find out
in Okinawa. There are pit vipers, very poisonous, yes, they
will kill you. And the Japanese, well, the Okanawans. Look,

(33:22):
it's a real dispute whether Okanahwan's or Japanese. I'm not
going into this. We're just gonna call it the Japanese
for now to for simplicity's sake. They have figured out
some kind of rice based drink that involves this pit viper.
And look, you can image search it online if you
want to see what it looks like. I'm sure they're

(33:42):
out there. I'm sure an image search would show it
to you. But this drink is not served in oh.
I don't know a bottle bottles of it may exist.
Do you know how you consume habusaki? There is a
gigantic clear glass jar sitting there. There's a big opening

(34:02):
at the top in this clear glass jar. I can't
stress this enough. In this clear glass jar, there is
an entire pit viper. Obviously he's dead because he's completely
submerged in the alcohol. This one, if memory serves me,

(34:22):
I don't know whether this is custom or not. This one,
they had pride his mouth open so his fangs were
sticking out. It almost looked like he was striking that.
Maybe custom. I'm guessing it was custom. But the guys,
the gangsters we were drinking with insisted that we go
out and take our little cups and we dip them
in the top of this habu saki and we down one.

(34:48):
We did, and we were all three in the bathroom
throwing up in about ten seconds after that. If you
ever get the chance to take habu saki, I would
highly recommend not doing. However, if the choice ever came
between drinking another shot of habu saki or listening to
Chuck Schumer's voice, I can't guarantee which way I would go.

(35:09):
I want to tell you Gorzach. I want to tell
you Kavanaugh, you have released the whirlwind and you will
pay the price. You won't know what hit you if
you go forward with these awful decisions. Who has a
voice like that? My goodness? All right, we still have

(35:32):
a lot to go on the Jesse Kelly Show. Elon Musk,
of course he's been in the news. Elon Musk thinks
somebody might try to kill him. I say, he's not
necessarily wrong, and probably more importantly, almost undoubtedly more importantly,
someone has a question by email. They have a very
specific question about the FBI and what hasn't been released

(35:56):
to the public, and I think this is something we
should all dig into together, don't you All? That's still
to come on the Jesse Kelly Show. Remember Jesse. At
Jesse Kelly show dot com is the email address. Your love,
your hate, your death threats, you're asked, doctor Jesse questions.
All are welcome there and if you miss any part
of the show, download the whole thing on iHeart, Google, Spotify,

(36:20):
and iTunes on iTunes. A five star rating in a
review about how handsome I Am is critical for the show.
I'm gonna go eat some cookies. Hang on