April 28, 2025 • 8 mins
On this episode of The Thought Shower, Intern John recaps Chues-Day and talks about how to know if YOU are actually the problem!
Every week Intern John discusses adulting, dating, radio life, and more! You can follow Intern John on social media: @InternJohnRadio. You can listen to past episodes at TheThoughtShower.com
Every week Intern John discusses adulting, dating, radio life, and more! You can follow Intern John on social media: @InternJohnRadio. You can listen to past episodes at TheThoughtShower.com
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
And a happy Monday friend. Welcome to the thought Shower.
Intern John is my name. It was a weekend. It
was indeed. I mean actually last week was kind of
like a marathon, if you will, so for me. On Tuesday,
aside from the pregnancy signs launched across the DMV, across
(00:23):
across the DMV, went to the Nats game last Tuesday.
That was lovely. Then Wednesday went to the Capitol's game.
Thursday went golfing my friend DJ Rise. And then Friday,
I had allergies like all week, like not good, coughing, sneezing,
(00:43):
running nose. I kind of felt like my head was
gonna explode. And then uh, Friday, got a hotel by
my restaurant and like basically took a five hour nap,
like in two different increments. Went to dinner my buddy
DJ Rise. That was lovely. Saturday was Tuesday, and man,
(01:04):
let me just say that was an event that I
had thought of, you know, in chewy past. On New
Year's my mind went to what can we do to
keep his legacy alive and to help other animals. So
the idea of Chuesday wasn't necessarily born because we used
(01:24):
to do Tuesday, every Tuesday post a photo of him.
But the idea of how to continue his legacy, and
so we team with Lost Dog and Cat Rescue and
they brought a bunch of puppies and dogs out to
my restaurant, Hide Social this weekend in honor of Chewy.
Speaker 2 (01:44):
And it was very emotional, you know, it was all.
Speaker 1 (01:48):
It was emotional in several ways because leading up to it,
it was supposed to rain, and I was like, oh man,
please please don't rain. And at like two o'clock everything
was sunny, Everything was good. Around like two twenty so,
ten minutes before the events start, it's just downboard and
I mean it poured. I was walking skittles back to
(02:11):
the hotel, had changed my shirt and my hat, that's
how wet it was. And I was like, ah, man,
like this sucks. You know, this is supposed to be
a good day for dogs for the show. But then
the rain stopped, the sun came out, and man, people
came and it was it was very sweet. I was
also blessed. A bunch of my friends came that I
(02:31):
didn't know we're coming. My buddy Shane came, My buddy
Dante came with his family, one of my best friends
Justin came, Julianna, good friend from NBC, my friend Michael
Ann came. A bunch of friends came out that I
didn't necessarily know we're coming. It was very special and
we had the banners of Chewy up and met a
(02:52):
bunch of listeners as well, and I was I got close.
I'm not gonna lie to you. I was very close
to getting a dog. There was one particular who I
was like, Okay, we're vibing. She's adorable. She's also small,
because I do think that with Skittles, he's gonna need
probably a female dog who is smaller, who won't challenge
(03:14):
his authority, so to speak. And if I wasn't going
to a town in a week with my dad, probably
would have pulled the trigger, so to speak.
Speaker 2 (03:23):
But didn't.
Speaker 1 (03:24):
It's all good, so okay. But yeah, even on Saturday
though with my allergies. Man, so the event was at
two thirty. I slept untill ten o'clock on Saturday, which
that never happens for me, never happens. Did that, woke
up less skills out, took a two hour and app
right away like I was out bad this weekend just
(03:45):
with the allergies.
Speaker 2 (03:45):
Feels better now. I'm a fighter doing it for you.
Speaker 1 (03:48):
But huge thanks everybody came out to Tuesday. It was
it was amazing. I do hope that we'll do it
again sometime. I think that's the goal, that it's the plan.
It was amazing. Want to hit this for your Monday.
The signs you might be the villain in the relationship,
Oh boy, At some point, I imagine all of us
have been starting with you.
Speaker 2 (04:08):
Brush off their feelings.
Speaker 1 (04:11):
They say, acknowledging and validating feelings is crucial for relationship health.
Ignoring this can create emotional disconnect that's hard to mend.
I think that's true. I would also say it's you know,
it's one of those things where I'm trying to get
the example of, like maybe if I went out late
(04:33):
to a bar, right if I was at my bar
late and I was dating somebody, I ain't respond to
a text right away, and they, in my mind blow up,
and I'm like, well, that's right, brush out their feelings,
not knowing that in their past relationship, maybe their boyfriend
did that, but he wasn't working at the restaurant, he
was with another girl. You know, I think like there's
a reason why people bring people bring things up and
(04:55):
why they had those feelings and might not have to
do with you. But I think that's the part like dating,
is you're dating their trauma too. You know, if you're
always trying to win. They say healthy debates can share
upen minds and strengthen bonds, but if every conversation feels
like a courtroom battle, you're in dangerous territory. Striving to
an arguments any costs can leave your partner feeling alienated
(05:18):
and unheard. I've been in relationships where it does feel
like we're trying to get wins and losses. And I've
been relationships too where it's like I was in the
right one hundred percent and had they just said I'm sorry,
we could have moved on, but they couldn't do it.
And to me, that was a huge, huge, huge flag,
(05:40):
right because it's like it's obvious that you're wrong, Like
I'm not even being like on my own ish, but
one hundred percent obvious they were wrong. It's like the
more you deny it, it's like, man, ill gotta do
is say sorry, we can move on.
Speaker 2 (05:53):
You know.
Speaker 1 (05:53):
Now, I've been relationships to where I was very blessed
where it didn't feel like we were fighting against each other,
we were fighting against problem. I think that's obviously the
way to go if you keep records.
Speaker 2 (06:05):
Ooh.
Speaker 1 (06:06):
They say relationships should not resemble a bank ledger of
grievances and favors. If you're constantly or calling past mistakes
or leveraging previous good deeds to justify your actions, you're
essentially weaponizing history.
Speaker 2 (06:19):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (06:19):
I would also say too, if you're keeping track, then
at that point, why would somebody admit to mistakes if
you're not gonna forget the mistakes?
Speaker 2 (06:29):
You know what I mean?
Speaker 1 (06:31):
Like, why would I admit I was wrong if I
know that down the line you're gonna bring up the
time I was wrong and use it against me and
throw it in my face. What about that seems like
a fun time for me, right? I think that's huge. Yeah,
because it's almost like you're holding the reverse into a
car at all times, waiting to smack it down somebody's face.
Speaker 2 (06:52):
I'm not not fan of that.
Speaker 1 (06:55):
If you use sarcasm as a weapon, they say, sarcasm
when you spare can add humor to a relationship, but
willing it as a weapon is a different story. If
your partner often feels belittled or confused by your remarks,
might be time to reassess the communications style.
Speaker 2 (07:10):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (07:10):
I just think sarcasm in terms of a relationship is
just kind of rude, you know what I mean, especially
because I think that that's supposed to be your closest person,
that's supposed to be the person that's on your side,
you know, on your team. If they're using sarcasm against you, Yeah,
(07:31):
especially if it's in the context of, like we're not
having a fight, but having an argument maybe discussion, and
you hit back with sarcasm. I also tend to think
that if you use sarcasm in argument, you're probably wrong, right, Like,
you're probably wrong, You probably have ideas you result to that.
Speaker 2 (07:49):
Then again, what do I know? Am I the relationship expert?
Speaker 1 (07:52):
No?
Speaker 2 (07:52):
I'm not.
Speaker 1 (07:54):
I hope you have a great Monday. If you're at Tuesday,
thank you so much. I will say this, stay tuned
and in we might have more things coming. It's the
thought shower.
And a happy Monday friend. Welcome to the thought Shower.
Intern John is my name. It was a weekend. It
was indeed. I mean actually last week was kind of
like a marathon, if you will, so for me. On Tuesday,
aside from the pregnancy signs launched across the DMV, across
(00:23):
across the DMV, went to the Nats game last Tuesday.
That was lovely. Then Wednesday went to the Capitol's game.
Thursday went golfing my friend DJ Rise. And then Friday,
I had allergies like all week, like not good, coughing, sneezing,
(00:43):
running nose. I kind of felt like my head was
gonna explode. And then uh, Friday, got a hotel by
my restaurant and like basically took a five hour nap,
like in two different increments. Went to dinner my buddy
DJ Rise. That was lovely. Saturday was Tuesday, and man,
(01:04):
let me just say that was an event that I
had thought of, you know, in chewy past. On New
Year's my mind went to what can we do to
keep his legacy alive and to help other animals. So
the idea of Chuesday wasn't necessarily born because we used
(01:24):
to do Tuesday, every Tuesday post a photo of him.
But the idea of how to continue his legacy, and
so we team with Lost Dog and Cat Rescue and
they brought a bunch of puppies and dogs out to
my restaurant, Hide Social this weekend in honor of Chewy.
Speaker 2 (01:44):
And it was very emotional, you know, it was all.
Speaker 1 (01:48):
It was emotional in several ways because leading up to it,
it was supposed to rain, and I was like, oh man,
please please don't rain. And at like two o'clock everything
was sunny, Everything was good. Around like two twenty so,
ten minutes before the events start, it's just downboard and
I mean it poured. I was walking skittles back to
(02:11):
the hotel, had changed my shirt and my hat, that's
how wet it was. And I was like, ah, man,
like this sucks. You know, this is supposed to be
a good day for dogs for the show. But then
the rain stopped, the sun came out, and man, people
came and it was it was very sweet. I was
also blessed. A bunch of my friends came that I
(02:31):
didn't know we're coming. My buddy Shane came, My buddy
Dante came with his family, one of my best friends
Justin came, Julianna, good friend from NBC, my friend Michael
Ann came. A bunch of friends came out that I
didn't necessarily know we're coming. It was very special and
we had the banners of Chewy up and met a
(02:52):
bunch of listeners as well, and I was I got close.
I'm not gonna lie to you. I was very close
to getting a dog. There was one particular who I
was like, Okay, we're vibing. She's adorable. She's also small,
because I do think that with Skittles, he's gonna need
probably a female dog who is smaller, who won't challenge
(03:14):
his authority, so to speak. And if I wasn't going
to a town in a week with my dad, probably
would have pulled the trigger, so to speak.
Speaker 2 (03:23):
But didn't.
Speaker 1 (03:24):
It's all good, so okay. But yeah, even on Saturday
though with my allergies. Man, so the event was at
two thirty. I slept untill ten o'clock on Saturday, which
that never happens for me, never happens. Did that, woke
up less skills out, took a two hour and app
right away like I was out bad this weekend just
(03:45):
with the allergies.
Speaker 2 (03:45):
Feels better now. I'm a fighter doing it for you.
Speaker 1 (03:48):
But huge thanks everybody came out to Tuesday. It was
it was amazing. I do hope that we'll do it
again sometime. I think that's the goal, that it's the plan.
It was amazing. Want to hit this for your Monday.
The signs you might be the villain in the relationship,
Oh boy, At some point, I imagine all of us
have been starting with you.
Speaker 2 (04:08):
Brush off their feelings.
Speaker 1 (04:11):
They say, acknowledging and validating feelings is crucial for relationship health.
Ignoring this can create emotional disconnect that's hard to mend.
I think that's true. I would also say it's you know,
it's one of those things where I'm trying to get
the example of, like maybe if I went out late
(04:33):
to a bar, right if I was at my bar
late and I was dating somebody, I ain't respond to
a text right away, and they, in my mind blow up,
and I'm like, well, that's right, brush out their feelings,
not knowing that in their past relationship, maybe their boyfriend
did that, but he wasn't working at the restaurant, he
was with another girl. You know, I think like there's
a reason why people bring people bring things up and
(04:55):
why they had those feelings and might not have to
do with you. But I think that's the part like dating,
is you're dating their trauma too. You know, if you're
always trying to win. They say healthy debates can share
upen minds and strengthen bonds, but if every conversation feels
like a courtroom battle, you're in dangerous territory. Striving to
an arguments any costs can leave your partner feeling alienated
(05:18):
and unheard. I've been in relationships where it does feel
like we're trying to get wins and losses. And I've
been relationships too where it's like I was in the
right one hundred percent and had they just said I'm sorry,
we could have moved on, but they couldn't do it.
And to me, that was a huge, huge, huge flag,
(05:40):
right because it's like it's obvious that you're wrong, Like
I'm not even being like on my own ish, but
one hundred percent obvious they were wrong. It's like the
more you deny it, it's like, man, ill gotta do
is say sorry, we can move on.
Speaker 2 (05:53):
You know.
Speaker 1 (05:53):
Now, I've been relationships to where I was very blessed
where it didn't feel like we were fighting against each other,
we were fighting against problem. I think that's obviously the
way to go if you keep records.
Speaker 2 (06:05):
Ooh.
Speaker 1 (06:06):
They say relationships should not resemble a bank ledger of
grievances and favors. If you're constantly or calling past mistakes
or leveraging previous good deeds to justify your actions, you're
essentially weaponizing history.
Speaker 2 (06:19):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (06:19):
I would also say too, if you're keeping track, then
at that point, why would somebody admit to mistakes if
you're not gonna forget the mistakes?
Speaker 2 (06:29):
You know what I mean?
Speaker 1 (06:31):
Like, why would I admit I was wrong if I
know that down the line you're gonna bring up the
time I was wrong and use it against me and
throw it in my face. What about that seems like
a fun time for me, right? I think that's huge. Yeah,
because it's almost like you're holding the reverse into a
car at all times, waiting to smack it down somebody's face.
Speaker 2 (06:52):
I'm not not fan of that.
Speaker 1 (06:55):
If you use sarcasm as a weapon, they say, sarcasm
when you spare can add humor to a relationship, but
willing it as a weapon is a different story. If
your partner often feels belittled or confused by your remarks,
might be time to reassess the communications style.
Speaker 2 (07:10):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (07:10):
I just think sarcasm in terms of a relationship is
just kind of rude, you know what I mean, especially
because I think that that's supposed to be your closest person,
that's supposed to be the person that's on your side,
you know, on your team. If they're using sarcasm against you, Yeah,
(07:31):
especially if it's in the context of, like we're not
having a fight, but having an argument maybe discussion, and
you hit back with sarcasm. I also tend to think
that if you use sarcasm in argument, you're probably wrong, right, Like,
you're probably wrong, You probably have ideas you result to that.
Speaker 2 (07:49):
Then again, what do I know? Am I the relationship expert?
Speaker 1 (07:52):
No?
Speaker 2 (07:52):
I'm not.
Speaker 1 (07:54):
I hope you have a great Monday. If you're at Tuesday,
thank you so much. I will say this, stay tuned
and in we might have more things coming. It's the
thought shower.
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