September 16, 2024 • 10 mins
On this episode of The Thought Shower, Intern John talks about his weekend, and how to know if you're dealing with fake friends
Every week Intern John discusses adulting, dating, radio life, and more! You can follow Intern John on social media: @InternJohnRadio. You can listen to past episodes at TheThoughtShower.com
Every week Intern John discusses adulting, dating, radio life, and more! You can follow Intern John on social media: @InternJohnRadio. You can listen to past episodes at TheThoughtShower.com
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
And a happy Monday friend to welcome to thought shower.
Intern John is my name. It was indeed a weekend,
although last week, as I mentioned, kind of felt like
it it flew by, uh I nowhere. It's kind of
like a boom baby, here we go. But we're doing it.
We're back. Had a chance to relax a little bit
(00:22):
this weekend. Stayed in Friday, stay in Saturday, and they
went out Sunday, made a conscious effort to actually like
focus and like not do anything, try to relax, try to,
you know, recuperate a little bit. Actually did it. Although
(00:44):
went to the gym still, so that was good. Then
Sunday rather went to the Ravens game. The tail gout
with Jimmy's famous seafood was fantastic. Went with my good
buddy Ryan and our buddy Brandon and it was a
whole We left my house around like nine did the
tailgate saw luxury. It was a lovely time, a beautiful day.
(01:08):
I should have worn that are sunscreen. Have a bit
of a sunburn and not just any sunburn. It looks
like me. You can tell us we're in a hat.
You can tell us one of the backwards hat. Not
great certainly a misstep by me. The worst part is
(01:29):
not much I can do now, you know. Oh, I
also worked on this project this weekend I can't talk
about yet, but I'm very excited for you to see.
It's unlike anything I've done before. So there's that. I
have a wedding this coming weekend in a beautiful sea Isle,
New Jersey. I've never been. And also, if I'm being honest,
(01:50):
this is like the time of year where like I
just know it to where now like I'm just like, oh,
I can wear this and this. I just kind of
figured out that. But now I'm like, oh, this weekend,
what do I do. It's gonna be seventy two. It's
not like a beach wedding. It's like a beach reception,
(02:10):
if you will. So I was playing wearing before, like shorts,
you know, nice shorts in a button up shirt. Now
I feel like it's gonna be seventy two for the
high I don't know if that's the move at night's
even in the sixties. Yes, Now I feel like I
have to wear pants. Ah. Now, I had just figured
out what to wear, this is my problem. And then
(02:34):
like you know, fall in winter fairly normal to figure
out to wear, you know, pants whatever, But like that
little it's always like that couple week overlap where it's
like do you pull the plug in the shorts now
and go pants? Although I think here though, it's gonna
be like hold on, it's been the weather hour. Here
(02:57):
it's only high seventies, So you understand how my life
is difficult, right, what do I do? I also decided
to I'm gonna bring the dogs to the wedding, although
the Airbnb allows pets. However, I don't think I said
that in the beginning that I was gonna bring pets,
so hopefully they don't care. I'm assuming they won't. The
(03:18):
boys never cause issues. But I'm excited my first time
in I mean, I guess you consider this a Jersey Shore.
I think, at least I think sets considered the Jersey Shore.
So I'm excited to go for that. Because it's a
radio wedding seeing some radio friends. There's a chance that
I'm meeting some radio friends for the first time. But
(03:40):
I mean, like folks that I've seen online followed their stuff,
but I never actually met in person before. So that's
also like for us with radio stuff, that's kind of
cool too, So I hope you have a great Monday.
We I get to that first, and let me get
to this too. Things fake friends do that real friends
ends would never do. We don't got time for fake friends. Also,
(04:05):
I don't know where my voice is. I went to
bed fairly early last night. I don't know if it's
just because of being outside or what. But my goodness,
they're only around for the good times. Yeah, that to
me is obviously not a real friend. If they're only
around like when you accomplish something, have things going your way. Yeah,
(04:27):
that's a signed to me that they're not in for
the long haul. There's also on the flip side, if
they're only around for the bad times. I've heard that too,
because that means they just want to see you down,
if they have no interest in seeing you succeed, so
they'll only be around when things are bad. Which that
is so mess up too, you know, so mess up.
(04:50):
If it's the me me me show, conversations revolve entirely
around them, their problems, their drama. They rarely ask how
you are and seem to zone out when you try
to talk about yourself. It's the worst kind of friend.
That's just so annoying too, because again, like my mind
goes to, like I might as well as talk to
(05:11):
the wall, dude. Like, there's some people where it's like
you really feel like you can't have a conversation with them,
And at that point, it's like why are we even talking?
You know, if it feels like you're on the receiving
end of a ted talk all the time, it's like
what do we even? What do we do it? If
(05:32):
I can literally talk to the wall and get the
same amount of like emotional or sponsorment, that's not a
good sign. If they are the queen or king of
the backhanded compliment. Absolutely, they make you question yourself, chipping
away your confidence while pretending to be support of Yeah,
(05:53):
to me's one of the most annoying things too, because
like you can definitely tell, you know, you can definitely
tell when it comes. And I think backhanded compliments are
so much worse because there's more thought into it. You
know that you had to put thought into how to
say the thing you're gonna say to make it seem positive,
(06:13):
but really to to cut the other person down. They
judge everything you do, They disapprove of your choices, your
partner job, haircut, whatever. They can't resist offering unsolicited advice,
making you feel second guests and small say, real friends
accept who you are, even if they don't always agree
(06:35):
with you. I think that's fair because again it goes
back to like your friends are supposed to be a
bit of like a solitude, a place like to feel safe.
And if you feel like they're gonna be the ones
taking even more shots, yeah, then that's like not a
real friend one hundred percent. They pretend you're closer than
(06:55):
you are on social media. I've seen this before. I've
been the victim of it too, where somebody will post
something and you just kind of go like, wait, why
are we acting like we're like besties? Why we acting
like you've been here the whole time? You know? Or
we'll take you and like random memes and stuff. I'm like, hey,
(07:16):
we aren't that cool dude, Like you can't act like
it on social media. But if I actually need you
and like call you, no response, no answer. Yeah, if
they go missing for ages, you reach out to make plans,
get radio silence. They're flaky, unreliable, always with the half
(07:38):
baked excuse they say real friends and prioritize their time
with you. They also genuinely value the relationship. I think
that's fair. Now I have friends where we'll not talk
as much over a period of time, and like we're
still good. We get back in the same room. It's
like back nothing. I think that's different. This is more
so like I getting that person that just like is
(08:00):
it's so hot and coldiest never know if they don't
know how or refuse to keep your secrets. Let me
tell you, if I had a friend give away my secrets,
it'd be over. I wouldn't be the friend anymore because again,
at that point, it's like, I'm very much like keep
(08:21):
the circle closed kind of guy. If I can't trust
you with that, I can't trust you with a secret. No, dude,
we cannot be friends. It's not gonna work. If they
don't want you to grow. Yeah, to me, I think
you see some friendships you just outgrow, right, But if
(08:41):
you're trying to better yourself, they're content trying to drag
you down. They sabotage your goals to smiths your ambitions.
And I've seen this happen before a lot with folks
trying to lose weight, or like if they friend somebody
says like, I'm not drinking today, and then the other
friend comes in and just kind of bullies them to
do so, Yeah, that's not good. Final one I'll hit today.
(09:03):
They're always competing with you one hundred percent. I've had
friendships where it's like I didn't realize we were in competition,
and then like you sit back and you go, oh, okay,
all right, if we're not, we're not rooting for me.
You know, there's a certainly a double motivation to say
(09:25):
your success makes them secretly jealous instead happy, they downplay
your achievements and try to one up you. See, real
friends are your cheerleaders. Their support feels genuine, not tied
up with rivalry. One hundred percent. Where that person gets like, hey,
good job, but I'm coming for you, it's like, oh god, dude,
(09:47):
life's hard enough as it is without having a second
guess your friendship. No, if you have a friendship like this,
hell no, you deserve way way better. Dare I say
the best? Hope you have a fantastic Monday. Appreciate you
hanging stashower
And a happy Monday friend to welcome to thought shower.
Intern John is my name. It was indeed a weekend,
although last week, as I mentioned, kind of felt like
it it flew by, uh I nowhere. It's kind of
like a boom baby, here we go. But we're doing it.
We're back. Had a chance to relax a little bit
(00:22):
this weekend. Stayed in Friday, stay in Saturday, and they
went out Sunday, made a conscious effort to actually like
focus and like not do anything, try to relax, try to,
you know, recuperate a little bit. Actually did it. Although
(00:44):
went to the gym still, so that was good. Then
Sunday rather went to the Ravens game. The tail gout
with Jimmy's famous seafood was fantastic. Went with my good
buddy Ryan and our buddy Brandon and it was a
whole We left my house around like nine did the
tailgate saw luxury. It was a lovely time, a beautiful day.
(01:08):
I should have worn that are sunscreen. Have a bit
of a sunburn and not just any sunburn. It looks
like me. You can tell us we're in a hat.
You can tell us one of the backwards hat. Not
great certainly a misstep by me. The worst part is
(01:29):
not much I can do now, you know. Oh, I
also worked on this project this weekend I can't talk
about yet, but I'm very excited for you to see.
It's unlike anything I've done before. So there's that. I
have a wedding this coming weekend in a beautiful sea Isle,
New Jersey. I've never been. And also, if I'm being honest,
(01:50):
this is like the time of year where like I
just know it to where now like I'm just like, oh,
I can wear this and this. I just kind of
figured out that. But now I'm like, oh, this weekend,
what do I do. It's gonna be seventy two. It's
not like a beach wedding. It's like a beach reception,
(02:10):
if you will. So I was playing wearing before, like shorts,
you know, nice shorts in a button up shirt. Now
I feel like it's gonna be seventy two for the
high I don't know if that's the move at night's
even in the sixties. Yes, Now I feel like I
have to wear pants. Ah. Now, I had just figured
out what to wear, this is my problem. And then
(02:34):
like you know, fall in winter fairly normal to figure
out to wear, you know, pants whatever, But like that
little it's always like that couple week overlap where it's
like do you pull the plug in the shorts now
and go pants? Although I think here though, it's gonna
be like hold on, it's been the weather hour. Here
(02:57):
it's only high seventies, So you understand how my life
is difficult, right, what do I do? I also decided
to I'm gonna bring the dogs to the wedding, although
the Airbnb allows pets. However, I don't think I said
that in the beginning that I was gonna bring pets,
so hopefully they don't care. I'm assuming they won't. The
(03:18):
boys never cause issues. But I'm excited my first time
in I mean, I guess you consider this a Jersey Shore.
I think, at least I think sets considered the Jersey Shore.
So I'm excited to go for that. Because it's a
radio wedding seeing some radio friends. There's a chance that
I'm meeting some radio friends for the first time. But
(03:40):
I mean, like folks that I've seen online followed their stuff,
but I never actually met in person before. So that's
also like for us with radio stuff, that's kind of
cool too, So I hope you have a great Monday.
We I get to that first, and let me get
to this too. Things fake friends do that real friends
ends would never do. We don't got time for fake friends. Also,
(04:05):
I don't know where my voice is. I went to
bed fairly early last night. I don't know if it's
just because of being outside or what. But my goodness,
they're only around for the good times. Yeah, that to
me is obviously not a real friend. If they're only
around like when you accomplish something, have things going your way. Yeah,
(04:27):
that's a signed to me that they're not in for
the long haul. There's also on the flip side, if
they're only around for the bad times. I've heard that too,
because that means they just want to see you down,
if they have no interest in seeing you succeed, so
they'll only be around when things are bad. Which that
is so mess up too, you know, so mess up.
(04:50):
If it's the me me me show, conversations revolve entirely
around them, their problems, their drama. They rarely ask how
you are and seem to zone out when you try
to talk about yourself. It's the worst kind of friend.
That's just so annoying too, because again, like my mind
goes to, like I might as well as talk to
(05:11):
the wall, dude. Like, there's some people where it's like
you really feel like you can't have a conversation with them,
And at that point, it's like why are we even talking?
You know, if it feels like you're on the receiving
end of a ted talk all the time, it's like
what do we even? What do we do it? If
(05:32):
I can literally talk to the wall and get the
same amount of like emotional or sponsorment, that's not a
good sign. If they are the queen or king of
the backhanded compliment. Absolutely, they make you question yourself, chipping
away your confidence while pretending to be support of Yeah,
(05:53):
to me's one of the most annoying things too, because
like you can definitely tell, you know, you can definitely
tell when it comes. And I think backhanded compliments are
so much worse because there's more thought into it. You
know that you had to put thought into how to
say the thing you're gonna say to make it seem positive,
(06:13):
but really to to cut the other person down. They
judge everything you do, They disapprove of your choices, your
partner job, haircut, whatever. They can't resist offering unsolicited advice,
making you feel second guests and small say, real friends
accept who you are, even if they don't always agree
(06:35):
with you. I think that's fair because again it goes
back to like your friends are supposed to be a
bit of like a solitude, a place like to feel safe.
And if you feel like they're gonna be the ones
taking even more shots, yeah, then that's like not a
real friend one hundred percent. They pretend you're closer than
(06:55):
you are on social media. I've seen this before. I've
been the victim of it too, where somebody will post
something and you just kind of go like, wait, why
are we acting like we're like besties? Why we acting
like you've been here the whole time? You know? Or
we'll take you and like random memes and stuff. I'm like, hey,
(07:16):
we aren't that cool dude, Like you can't act like
it on social media. But if I actually need you
and like call you, no response, no answer. Yeah, if
they go missing for ages, you reach out to make plans,
get radio silence. They're flaky, unreliable, always with the half
(07:38):
baked excuse they say real friends and prioritize their time
with you. They also genuinely value the relationship. I think
that's fair. Now I have friends where we'll not talk
as much over a period of time, and like we're
still good. We get back in the same room. It's
like back nothing. I think that's different. This is more
so like I getting that person that just like is
(08:00):
it's so hot and coldiest never know if they don't
know how or refuse to keep your secrets. Let me
tell you, if I had a friend give away my secrets,
it'd be over. I wouldn't be the friend anymore because again,
at that point, it's like, I'm very much like keep
(08:21):
the circle closed kind of guy. If I can't trust
you with that, I can't trust you with a secret. No, dude,
we cannot be friends. It's not gonna work. If they
don't want you to grow. Yeah, to me, I think
you see some friendships you just outgrow, right, But if
(08:41):
you're trying to better yourself, they're content trying to drag
you down. They sabotage your goals to smiths your ambitions.
And I've seen this happen before a lot with folks
trying to lose weight, or like if they friend somebody
says like, I'm not drinking today, and then the other
friend comes in and just kind of bullies them to
do so, Yeah, that's not good. Final one I'll hit today.
(09:03):
They're always competing with you one hundred percent. I've had
friendships where it's like I didn't realize we were in competition,
and then like you sit back and you go, oh, okay,
all right, if we're not, we're not rooting for me.
You know, there's a certainly a double motivation to say
(09:25):
your success makes them secretly jealous instead happy, they downplay
your achievements and try to one up you. See, real
friends are your cheerleaders. Their support feels genuine, not tied
up with rivalry. One hundred percent. Where that person gets like, hey,
good job, but I'm coming for you, it's like, oh god, dude,
(09:47):
life's hard enough as it is without having a second
guess your friendship. No, if you have a friendship like this,
hell no, you deserve way way better. Dare I say
the best? Hope you have a fantastic Monday. Appreciate you
hanging stashower
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