December 22, 2023 • 11 mins
On this episode of The Thought Shower, Intern John talks about the phrases people use to manipulate you!
Every week Intern John discusses adulting, dating, radio life, and more! You can follow Intern John on social media: @InternJohnRadio You can listen to past episodes at TheThoughtShower.com and you can WATCH here: WatchTheThoughtShower.com
Every week Intern John discusses adulting, dating, radio life, and more! You can follow Intern John on social media: @InternJohnRadio You can listen to past episodes at TheThoughtShower.com and you can WATCH here: WatchTheThoughtShower.com
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
(00:00):
Why, hello friend, welcome tothe Thoughts Shower. My name is Intern
John. Thank you so much forhanging out. It was funny. I
had somebody yesterday do you have meand asked, Hey, when are you
not going to be an intern?I'm like, ah, you know,
at this point, I think thename is stuck. The irony is I
(00:21):
was only really an intern for maybea year in Minneapolis, and the yeah,
the name is kind of stuck.And it was funny. When I
first moved to DC, there wassomebody in radio who was like, we
gotta think of like a nickname foryou. And I was like, I
mean, okay, because you needto have like a nickname, it'll sound
(00:43):
good. And they rated off ideasand I was kind of like, I
don't really have a nickname, youknow, like my friends will call me
in Minnesota call me by my lastname. Uh, I only want to
use that on the air. AndI was like, can we just go
with Intern John? And it wasfunny because they're like, well, you
(01:06):
know you're not an intern. I'mlike, yeah, I really don't think
like that matters at this point.I think it's more so just I don't
think ninety nine percent people think likethis guy should get paid eventually. The
name just stuck and like people asklike, does it bother me? Dude?
It could be a lot worse.Oh, it could be a lot
worse. There's people on radio whoare named after like Bodily functions could be
(01:29):
fart you know what I mean.Funny certainly, but not all the time,
you know what I mean. Ido think too, Like coming in
as intern John, I think thatgave me a little bit of grace too,
because I was, I mean reallynew still, Like I was really
new when I first moved here.Certainly, you know, filling Sammy Kaysho's
(01:51):
it was no small task, orat least trying to. So I think
like that was a huge help oflike people I believe kind of cut me
slack man. It's because when Igot here, people hated me. There's
people who are very nice, butpeople hated me. And I think it's
because Sammy and I are is sodifferent and I love Sammy great dude,
it's been good to me. Allof his success with Snacklings is very much
(02:15):
deserved, and so it was.It was. It was tough going to
the beginning. It was funny.We had people on the show. I
want to say last year calling whooriginally didn't like me, and I just
kind of asked, like, whatwas the moment that changed things? And
not like in a mean way.I was more so just curious, you
know, because I get it,like would I like me right away?
(02:37):
I don't know, I mean II The weird thing about the show is,
right, show is four hours,but your commute might only be fifteen
minutes. So if you happen tohear an off thing like you miss me
being a you know, perfect Catholicfor three hours and forty five minutes,
and of course I am, andthen for fifteen minutes I did joke about
(02:58):
you know, testes, you're probablynot gonna like me. So that's kind
of the weird thing about our showis, you know, we try to
get out of the mind frame thatpeople are listening for four hours, and
certainly some folks do, which isamazing. And with the podcast, you
can listen to everything. By theway, make sure you search the podcast.
Interns you on in your morning show. But here we are, so
(03:21):
long story short, No, itdoesn't bother me being called intern jump.
It's cool, it's awesome. It'sbeen a wild ride. Man, it's
been a wild, wild ride.I hope you're doing well. I hope
everything's so well in your life.I appreciate you honestly hanging out. I
know there's so many things trying toget your attention. Thank you for sending
some sending spending time with me.I found the phrases that seem innocent but
(03:45):
actually a manipulative I wanted to gothrough these and see if you agree.
I guess somebody says to you,I'm just trying to help. Mmm,
This to me falls in the categoryif somebody's like, I'm just being honest,
where it's like they're using it asan excuse for their bad behavior.
You know what I mean, Likethere, Oh, it's not me being
(04:08):
an ass if I say I'm justtrying to help, or I'm not being
an ass if I say I'm justbeing honest. I brought up this line
so many times Taylor's all too well. She has the line so casually cruel
in the name of being honest,like this person is so mean, but
(04:28):
hey, I'm just being honest.I don't need you to take the blame
if I'm just being honest. Yeah, I think that's also a bit gaslighting
to where it's like if if Itore somebody down and they're like, I'm
just trying to help, it's like, okay, probably better ways to do
it than what you're doing, youknow. I'm The next one is somebody
(04:51):
says you're overreacting. Nah. Yeah, they say it's like a gad jail
free card for the person who messedm M. They're trying to basically belittle
your feelings. Yeah, I mean, and like I've dealt with people before
who try to make me feel likeI was overreacting or my feelings weren't valid.
(05:14):
And it is crazy when you're inthe middle of that type of relationship,
whether it's work, whether it's familyfriends, where you're being kind of
made to think that your feelings oryour views and what happened aren't really what
happened. Like what you see assomebody flooded your basement is really in their
mind. No, somebody just spilleda speck of water on the floor.
(05:39):
Like I've been in that before andI've had to call people in my life
and be like, hey, amI crazy or is this happening, which
is a wild things. I'm usuallyso sure of myself and show and so
trusting in my own compass so tospeak. So the times I've had to
do that like pretty Wild Nat lookback, Like, Man, I was
so this combobulated that I didn't evenknow if my I don't know, not
(06:03):
my morals, but if my sightlinewas correct. If that makes sense,
Man, this next one, Ireally I've never had somebody say this that
I can remember. If you reallylove me, you would, man,
Yeah, I try to. Partof the reason, if I'm being completely
(06:25):
honest, that I try to talkso much about relationship stuff in the show
is because I truly mean when Isay, like, I want you to
be in a happy and healthy relationship. Everybody deserves that. You deserve to
feel loved and supported. You know, the person that you're with should never
say that, should never be questioningyour love as if it's a test.
(06:46):
You know that to me, Idon't know. I don't like that at
all. It's also like in thesame vein of when somebody tries to make
you feel like they're not you're notgood enough for them, that that's not
the vibe. Like I would nevermake Molly feel like she's not good enough
for me. That girl's amazing,like I'm lucky to have her, Because
I always say to you know,let's just say, for the sake of
(07:08):
the argument, you know, ifMollie thought that, if I was trying
to make Molly feel like she isreally lucky to have me, right,
I am too good for her.She's lucky to have me. What I
always say is, if that's thecase, if I really believe that,
why am I still with her?Then if you're dating somebody and they're trying
to make you feel like you shouldbe so thankful that you're dating me,
(07:30):
it's like, Okay, are theydoing charity work? Look, if you're
so lower than them, why arethey dating you? It's a boloney if
you asked me, if they say, I guess I'm just not good enough
for you. Mmm mmm mm mmmYeah, a little bit dramatic, right,
Like I remember I broke up withone of my high school girlfriends because
(07:55):
she was quoting an episode of theReal World and it was the oddest thing
where I was like I was fourteen, and I remember her reading her text
messages and I'm like, yeah,this is not how the situation is,
do you know what I mean?Like, also, I just washed this
episode two. Do you know whatI mean? She was talking about all
(08:16):
this type of stuff like that andnot being good enough. I was like,
hey, like we're we're kids,dude, this shouldn't be an issue.
One hundred percent agree. If somebodysays you're so sensitive, damn yeah,
because that's basically saying your feelings aren'tvalid. Right, Like if somebody's
like, oh, you're just beingsensitive, it's like, Okay, they're
trying to gate what they did,you know, trying to wash themselves of
(08:41):
any guilt and then make it seemlike, you know, it's all on
you. It's not because I issomething wrong. It's solely because you're being
sensitive. Don't like that. Ifsomebody says you're overthinking it. I get
told this sometimes that I overthink things, But I go back too. It's
(09:01):
always worked out, do you knowwhat I mean? It's always worked out.
Yeah. I'm lucky to be here. No real major issues. Yeah,
And like I think, sometimes itdepends on the situation. But I
also think, like I've seen thisbefore with like event planning stuff, where
somebody will say that I'm overthinking something, and I usually quit that to they
(09:24):
just don't want to do the work, you know what I mean, like,
like, did we check this tomake sure this? Are you're overthinking
it? Well? Am? II don't want to be on stage my
thumb, my rear end if somethinggoes wrong, you know what I mean.
I think that's a huge one.If somebody says it's just a joke,
relax, Yeah, jokes are funny. You know, it's interesting.
(09:46):
The Matt Rife thing. If youdon't know, Matt Rife, comedian really
blew up on TikTok specially came outon Netflix and he got dragged for it.
I was listening to podcast Anthony Jesslnik, one of my favorite comedians.
He's a little bit dark, butI think that he doesn't say the way
he words things to me, hecan tell he's very intelligent, and he
(10:09):
was talking about the Matt Rife thingand he's he brought this quote from Andy
Warhol that art is getting away withit. Like that, that's what it
is like if you do like ajoke or you do a comedy special and
people are angry at you. Youdidn't get away with it, you know
what I mean, Like, youdidn't pull it off. I like that
(10:31):
a lot, and that's why.I think a lot of times, like
you know, I'm pretty good atmy feet. I can tell the difference
between a joke and a roast.You know, there's there's a little bit
of a difference, because I thinka joke feels more off off, like
the off the cuffs, so tospeak, like a little quick jet,
a little quick thing, like alittle like throwing a roll a piece of
paper, small one in the trashcan, Whereas when it's a burn,
(10:54):
it feels like you're slamming the wholebook on somebody. Completely different vibes.
I grew with all these. Listen, I appreciate you. Thank you so
so much for listening. We'll talkto you next time.
Why, hello friend, welcome tothe Thoughts Shower. My name is Intern
John. Thank you so much forhanging out. It was funny. I
had somebody yesterday do you have meand asked, Hey, when are you
not going to be an intern?I'm like, ah, you know,
at this point, I think thename is stuck. The irony is I
(00:21):
was only really an intern for maybea year in Minneapolis, and the yeah,
the name is kind of stuck.And it was funny. When I
first moved to DC, there wassomebody in radio who was like, we
gotta think of like a nickname foryou. And I was like, I
mean, okay, because you needto have like a nickname, it'll sound
(00:43):
good. And they rated off ideasand I was kind of like, I
don't really have a nickname, youknow, like my friends will call me
in Minnesota call me by my lastname. Uh, I only want to
use that on the air. AndI was like, can we just go
with Intern John? And it wasfunny because they're like, well, you
(01:06):
know you're not an intern. I'mlike, yeah, I really don't think
like that matters at this point.I think it's more so just I don't
think ninety nine percent people think likethis guy should get paid eventually. The
name just stuck and like people asklike, does it bother me? Dude?
It could be a lot worse.Oh, it could be a lot
worse. There's people on radio whoare named after like Bodily functions could be
(01:29):
fart you know what I mean.Funny certainly, but not all the time,
you know what I mean. Ido think too, Like coming in
as intern John, I think thatgave me a little bit of grace too,
because I was, I mean reallynew still, Like I was really
new when I first moved here.Certainly, you know, filling Sammy Kaysho's
(01:51):
it was no small task, orat least trying to. So I think
like that was a huge help oflike people I believe kind of cut me
slack man. It's because when Igot here, people hated me. There's
people who are very nice, butpeople hated me. And I think it's
because Sammy and I are is sodifferent and I love Sammy great dude,
it's been good to me. Allof his success with Snacklings is very much
(02:15):
deserved, and so it was.It was. It was tough going to
the beginning. It was funny.We had people on the show. I
want to say last year calling whooriginally didn't like me, and I just
kind of asked, like, whatwas the moment that changed things? And
not like in a mean way.I was more so just curious, you
know, because I get it,like would I like me right away?
(02:37):
I don't know, I mean II The weird thing about the show is,
right, show is four hours,but your commute might only be fifteen
minutes. So if you happen tohear an off thing like you miss me
being a you know, perfect Catholicfor three hours and forty five minutes,
and of course I am, andthen for fifteen minutes I did joke about
(02:58):
you know, testes, you're probablynot gonna like me. So that's kind
of the weird thing about our showis, you know, we try to
get out of the mind frame thatpeople are listening for four hours, and
certainly some folks do, which isamazing. And with the podcast, you
can listen to everything. By theway, make sure you search the podcast.
Interns you on in your morning show. But here we are, so
(03:21):
long story short, No, itdoesn't bother me being called intern jump.
It's cool, it's awesome. It'sbeen a wild ride. Man, it's
been a wild, wild ride.I hope you're doing well. I hope
everything's so well in your life.I appreciate you honestly hanging out. I
know there's so many things trying toget your attention. Thank you for sending
some sending spending time with me.I found the phrases that seem innocent but
(03:45):
actually a manipulative I wanted to gothrough these and see if you agree.
I guess somebody says to you,I'm just trying to help. Mmm,
This to me falls in the categoryif somebody's like, I'm just being honest,
where it's like they're using it asan excuse for their bad behavior.
You know what I mean, Likethere, Oh, it's not me being
(04:08):
an ass if I say I'm justtrying to help, or I'm not being
an ass if I say I'm justbeing honest. I brought up this line
so many times Taylor's all too well. She has the line so casually cruel
in the name of being honest,like this person is so mean, but
(04:28):
hey, I'm just being honest.I don't need you to take the blame
if I'm just being honest. Yeah, I think that's also a bit gaslighting
to where it's like if if Itore somebody down and they're like, I'm
just trying to help, it's like, okay, probably better ways to do
it than what you're doing, youknow. I'm The next one is somebody
(04:51):
says you're overreacting. Nah. Yeah, they say it's like a gad jail
free card for the person who messedm M. They're trying to basically belittle
your feelings. Yeah, I mean, and like I've dealt with people before
who try to make me feel likeI was overreacting or my feelings weren't valid.
(05:14):
And it is crazy when you're inthe middle of that type of relationship,
whether it's work, whether it's familyfriends, where you're being kind of
made to think that your feelings oryour views and what happened aren't really what
happened. Like what you see assomebody flooded your basement is really in their
mind. No, somebody just spilleda speck of water on the floor.
(05:39):
Like I've been in that before andI've had to call people in my life
and be like, hey, amI crazy or is this happening, which
is a wild things. I'm usuallyso sure of myself and show and so
trusting in my own compass so tospeak. So the times I've had to
do that like pretty Wild Nat lookback, Like, Man, I was
so this combobulated that I didn't evenknow if my I don't know, not
(06:03):
my morals, but if my sightlinewas correct. If that makes sense,
Man, this next one, Ireally I've never had somebody say this that
I can remember. If you reallylove me, you would, man,
Yeah, I try to. Partof the reason, if I'm being completely
(06:25):
honest, that I try to talkso much about relationship stuff in the show
is because I truly mean when Isay, like, I want you to
be in a happy and healthy relationship. Everybody deserves that. You deserve to
feel loved and supported. You know, the person that you're with should never
say that, should never be questioningyour love as if it's a test.
(06:46):
You know that to me, Idon't know. I don't like that at
all. It's also like in thesame vein of when somebody tries to make
you feel like they're not you're notgood enough for them, that that's not
the vibe. Like I would nevermake Molly feel like she's not good enough
for me. That girl's amazing,like I'm lucky to have her, Because
I always say to you know,let's just say, for the sake of
(07:08):
the argument, you know, ifMollie thought that, if I was trying
to make Molly feel like she isreally lucky to have me, right,
I am too good for her.She's lucky to have me. What I
always say is, if that's thecase, if I really believe that,
why am I still with her?Then if you're dating somebody and they're trying
to make you feel like you shouldbe so thankful that you're dating me,
(07:30):
it's like, Okay, are theydoing charity work? Look, if you're
so lower than them, why arethey dating you? It's a boloney if
you asked me, if they say, I guess I'm just not good enough
for you. Mmm mmm mm mmmYeah, a little bit dramatic, right,
Like I remember I broke up withone of my high school girlfriends because
(07:55):
she was quoting an episode of theReal World and it was the oddest thing
where I was like I was fourteen, and I remember her reading her text
messages and I'm like, yeah,this is not how the situation is,
do you know what I mean?Like, also, I just washed this
episode two. Do you know whatI mean? She was talking about all
(08:16):
this type of stuff like that andnot being good enough. I was like,
hey, like we're we're kids,dude, this shouldn't be an issue.
One hundred percent agree. If somebodysays you're so sensitive, damn yeah,
because that's basically saying your feelings aren'tvalid. Right, Like if somebody's
like, oh, you're just beingsensitive, it's like, Okay, they're
trying to gate what they did,you know, trying to wash themselves of
(08:41):
any guilt and then make it seemlike, you know, it's all on
you. It's not because I issomething wrong. It's solely because you're being
sensitive. Don't like that. Ifsomebody says you're overthinking it. I get
told this sometimes that I overthink things, But I go back too. It's
(09:01):
always worked out, do you knowwhat I mean? It's always worked out.
Yeah. I'm lucky to be here. No real major issues. Yeah,
And like I think, sometimes itdepends on the situation. But I
also think, like I've seen thisbefore with like event planning stuff, where
somebody will say that I'm overthinking something, and I usually quit that to they
(09:24):
just don't want to do the work, you know what I mean, like,
like, did we check this tomake sure this? Are you're overthinking
it? Well? Am? II don't want to be on stage my
thumb, my rear end if somethinggoes wrong, you know what I mean.
I think that's a huge one.If somebody says it's just a joke,
relax, Yeah, jokes are funny. You know, it's interesting.
(09:46):
The Matt Rife thing. If youdon't know, Matt Rife, comedian really
blew up on TikTok specially came outon Netflix and he got dragged for it.
I was listening to podcast Anthony Jesslnik, one of my favorite comedians.
He's a little bit dark, butI think that he doesn't say the way
he words things to me, hecan tell he's very intelligent, and he
(10:09):
was talking about the Matt Rife thingand he's he brought this quote from Andy
Warhol that art is getting away withit. Like that, that's what it
is like if you do like ajoke or you do a comedy special and
people are angry at you. Youdidn't get away with it, you know
what I mean, Like, youdidn't pull it off. I like that
(10:31):
a lot, and that's why.I think a lot of times, like
you know, I'm pretty good atmy feet. I can tell the difference
between a joke and a roast.You know, there's there's a little bit
of a difference, because I thinka joke feels more off off, like
the off the cuffs, so tospeak, like a little quick jet,
a little quick thing, like alittle like throwing a roll a piece of
paper, small one in the trashcan, Whereas when it's a burn,
(10:54):
it feels like you're slamming the wholebook on somebody. Completely different vibes.
I grew with all these. Listen, I appreciate you. Thank you so
so much for listening. We'll talkto you next time.
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