April 25, 2025 • 9 mins
On this episode of The Thought Shower, Intern John talks about how to know if you're in a one-sided friendship
Intern John and Your Morning Show are having their first ever CHUES-Day dog adoption event in honor of John's dog, Chuy! They have teamed with Lost Dog and Cat Rescue to find homes for some amazing animals! Saturday 4/26 2:30-4:30p @ Hyde Social in Arlington
Every week Intern John discusses adulting, dating, radio life, and more! You can follow Intern John on social media: @InternJohnRadio. You can listen to past episodes at TheThoughtShower.com
Intern John and Your Morning Show are having their first ever CHUES-Day dog adoption event in honor of John's dog, Chuy! They have teamed with Lost Dog and Cat Rescue to find homes for some amazing animals! Saturday 4/26 2:30-4:30p @ Hyde Social in Arlington
Every week Intern John discusses adulting, dating, radio life, and more! You can follow Intern John on social media: @InternJohnRadio. You can listen to past episodes at TheThoughtShower.com
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
Hello, friend, Welcome to the Thought Shower. Intern John is
my name. This is my third take at today's podcast.
In my ears, my allergies have ruined my voice today.
And maybe it's not true, but I have a very
sensitive ears to I was gonna say to sound, but
that's obvious. But because of like the industry that we're in,
(00:24):
I tend to hear things that most people can't hear
the first time around. So on my head, my voice
sounds like I've been swallowing TECs. Hopefully doesn't sound like
that to you. I feel fine, I feel good. It's
just like the pollen this year, and god, I sound
like an old person. Ah, the pollen, these damn trees.
(00:47):
It's all over my car, all over my throat. Probably
didn't help. They had a couple of cigars yesterday golfing,
but hey, had a great time. But here we are,
Happy Friday, Welcome the podcast. Appreciate you listening. It is
a big weekend for the show. I am so excited
Saturday tomorrow. We're doing Tuesday our first ever dog adoption
(01:09):
event in honor of my dog Chewy, who I lost
at the beginning of this year. It's gonna be a
Hide Social in Clarendon, Arlington, VA, two thirty to four
thirty pm Saturday. Now I do need to say this.
There is naturally an arts festival in Clarendon this weekend,
so a lot of roads will be closed, but there
(01:30):
is plenty of parking in garages around where Hide is.
So I hope to see you to me, you know,
the last twenty four hours, I'm pretty emotional. I did
some stuff with NBC the TV station talking about Chewy
and his legacy, and you know, it's one thing to do,
(01:50):
but to wash it back because I obviously wanted to
see it, that was pretty hard. You know. It's one
of those things where if you've gone through grief, it's
almost like your mind can can lie to you when
you're not at home. Like when I'm at work, my
mind tricks hisself to where it's like, oh, he's not
he's not gone, you know what I mean, why drive home?
(02:12):
I usually feel it when I go in the house.
Obviously seeing it on screen was a little bit like, oh,
he's gone, you know. But throughout this whole process, the
craziest thing, the most powerful thing, has been to see
the impact he made on so many people. So you know, luckily,
(02:35):
I'm very confident that tomorrow we're gonna have about some
amazing dogs and gets these animals forever homes thanks to
my boys. So hopefully see you tomorrow. Hide Social the
infoyms Radio dot Com. Golly man, I'm really trying to
fight through this. And again, like maybe to you, I
sound perfect. In my own head, it sounds off, and
(02:58):
it's like, once I get that thought in my head,
it's like, Okay, this is the way. It is one
of what we're gonna push through. We're warriors on this podcast.
Me and you want to get to the red flags.
You're in a one sided friendship. Now, I guess the
caveat to this is I do believe all relationships romantic
(03:18):
and not go through ebbs and flows, especially when there's
a baby involved or a big life event. So like,
if this is just for small periods of time, I
think it's probably okay. If this becomes the new norm,
then something's off, right, then it's time to readjust starting
with if you're always the one initiating contact, the line
(03:39):
they use is you might feel like a telemarketer. Now
they say life gets busy for all of us, but
communicating both ways is critical for relationship building. Yeah, and
I do think at some point, you know, there's like
the I'm not a parent, obviously, but I've heard parents
who have complained about how their friends won't buy the
(04:00):
mount places because they have kids. Assume the answers give
me no. I understand the parent feeling that way. As
the single person, I understand not wanting to ask because
rejection does hurt, right, being told no ten times, It's like,
I'm not even gonna ask anymore, and not even in
(04:21):
a bad way. It's like, ah, they have a kid,
it's not gonna work out. So I get that, But
I do you think, Yeah, it is like it's like
any relationship you had to work to maintain it if
their problems always come first, they say, in a healthier friendship,
both parties should feel equally comfortable sharing their challenges and triumphs.
But if your friendship is one sided, you notice their
(04:43):
friend your friend dominates conversation with their issues. Yeah, and
I've had friends in the past where it felt like
they were given basically a ted talk, Right, they were
there to give me a speech, and once their speech
was done, they're done. The conversation it's like, okay, so
just an audience member, you know. At that point, to
(05:07):
the friend, it's like you could have talked to the
wall and have gotten the same response. You know what
I mean, It's like, why am I even here if
they're always too busy? Now, obviously this to me a
bit sensitive a subject because my schedule can be dumb.
They see, everyone has a hectic schedule, but your friend
(05:28):
is always too busy made time for you. It might
be more than just a pat calendar being consistently unavailable
to indicate a lack of prioritization, rather than a genuine
lack of time. That is fair, right, we all make choices. Yeah,
I think that's true. It's funny. I've talked to some
buddies before. There's a buddy I have I'm thinking of.
We'll call them Chris. Chris and I grinded for a
(05:51):
long time and both now gotten into spots where it's
like we're busy. Yeah, we're pretty booked up. We have
another friend we'll call Joey, who doesn't get why we
can't hang out all the time. And it is a little
bit like, you know, to get to where you want
to be or at least where we wanted to be professionally,
we had to kind of sacrifice. And in the industry
(06:12):
we're in, if you're not busy, that's not a good sign.
Like if my schedule clears up and I got a
lot of free time, something went wrong, you know what
I mean, something went horribly wrong. And I think that's
kind of part of the thing to consider too. That one,
I'm a little more about if you feel like you're
walking on eggshells. Yes, they say in a balanced friendship
(06:35):
you should feel like being comfortable being yourself without fear
of judgment or backlash. I think that's fair obviously, especially
if you're afraid you're gonna say something and set them
off or having them shut down. That's a bit of
like an abusive relationship if they always make you feel
like you're doing the wrong thing. With friends, you're supposed
to be a let your guard down, be dumb, and
(06:55):
say things you wouldn't say from other people. You know,
that's supposed to be the the vibe. I hate this.
They make you feel guilty for having other friends. Yeah,
I have friend ones who meet and a buddy, like
to play hockey, like to skate, and so like there'd
be days we would go skate, like after work, go
(07:19):
to the rink, skate, have a good time. We had
another friend who would complain he wasn't invited, but he
doesn't know how to skate, he doesn't have skates. And
it's like, well, you're welcome to come. Well I'm not
gonna skating, all right, Well we're not gonna not skate
because you can't skate, you know what I mean. It's
(07:40):
an odd thing. It's a very possessive thing when that happens.
They say in the healthy friendship, both parties understand, understand
and respect each other's need for multiple social connections. Yeah,
I think that's a weird possessive thing. And I think
everybody has that friend where it's like if they introduce
you to somebody, it's like we guys hung out without me.
It's like, that's a weird. And I always feel like
(08:02):
to you, when you become the possessive friend, you always lose,
you know. When I first moved here, I became friends
with somebody who worked in the promotions department, and she
very nicely introduced me to a bunch of her friends,
and I became friends with those people, and I remember
she got jealous of it and at one point said
she was gonna make them choose between them, between whether
(08:25):
or her or me, And I told her, like, hey,
that's not going to go the way you think. If
you make your friends choose between you and me, it's
not gonna go that way. Number One, I'm awesome. I mean,
we all agree, but too, it's like people don't like
that kind of a choice. It's a very odd spot
to put somebody in. Last one is they're unreliable and
(08:48):
constantly canceled plans. The playing canceling thing, to me is
one of the most annoying things of all time, especially
if it's like a set event. And I'll give an
example if tickets for now will use the capitals like
the capitals, and we confirm are going to the game
a week in advance, and the day of you're like, hey,
I actually can't go. That to me is one of
(09:09):
the most annoying things, especially if it becomes a pattern,
because it's like, yo, just say you don't want to go,
or let me know prior to ten minutes before the event.
You know, I hope you have a great weekend. I
hope to see you tomorrow. Hide Social in Arlington for
Tuesday two thirty to four thirty pm. Huge. Thanks the
lost dog and Can't Rescue. It's gonna be amazing. Timeout
(09:32):
all thee infoymsradio dot com. I'll see you Monday
Hello, friend, Welcome to the Thought Shower. Intern John is
my name. This is my third take at today's podcast.
In my ears, my allergies have ruined my voice today.
And maybe it's not true, but I have a very
sensitive ears to I was gonna say to sound, but
that's obvious. But because of like the industry that we're in,
(00:24):
I tend to hear things that most people can't hear
the first time around. So on my head, my voice
sounds like I've been swallowing TECs. Hopefully doesn't sound like
that to you. I feel fine, I feel good. It's
just like the pollen this year, and god, I sound
like an old person. Ah, the pollen, these damn trees.
(00:47):
It's all over my car, all over my throat. Probably
didn't help. They had a couple of cigars yesterday golfing,
but hey, had a great time. But here we are,
Happy Friday, Welcome the podcast. Appreciate you listening. It is
a big weekend for the show. I am so excited
Saturday tomorrow. We're doing Tuesday our first ever dog adoption
(01:09):
event in honor of my dog Chewy, who I lost
at the beginning of this year. It's gonna be a
Hide Social in Clarendon, Arlington, VA, two thirty to four
thirty pm Saturday. Now I do need to say this.
There is naturally an arts festival in Clarendon this weekend,
so a lot of roads will be closed, but there
(01:30):
is plenty of parking in garages around where Hide is.
So I hope to see you to me, you know,
the last twenty four hours, I'm pretty emotional. I did
some stuff with NBC the TV station talking about Chewy
and his legacy, and you know, it's one thing to do,
(01:50):
but to wash it back because I obviously wanted to
see it, that was pretty hard. You know. It's one
of those things where if you've gone through grief, it's
almost like your mind can can lie to you when
you're not at home. Like when I'm at work, my
mind tricks hisself to where it's like, oh, he's not
he's not gone, you know what I mean, why drive home?
(02:12):
I usually feel it when I go in the house.
Obviously seeing it on screen was a little bit like, oh,
he's gone, you know. But throughout this whole process, the
craziest thing, the most powerful thing, has been to see
the impact he made on so many people. So you know, luckily,
(02:35):
I'm very confident that tomorrow we're gonna have about some
amazing dogs and gets these animals forever homes thanks to
my boys. So hopefully see you tomorrow. Hide Social the
infoyms Radio dot Com. Golly man, I'm really trying to
fight through this. And again, like maybe to you, I
sound perfect. In my own head, it sounds off, and
(02:58):
it's like, once I get that thought in my head,
it's like, Okay, this is the way. It is one
of what we're gonna push through. We're warriors on this podcast.
Me and you want to get to the red flags.
You're in a one sided friendship. Now, I guess the
caveat to this is I do believe all relationships romantic
(03:18):
and not go through ebbs and flows, especially when there's
a baby involved or a big life event. So like,
if this is just for small periods of time, I
think it's probably okay. If this becomes the new norm,
then something's off, right, then it's time to readjust starting
with if you're always the one initiating contact, the line
(03:39):
they use is you might feel like a telemarketer. Now
they say life gets busy for all of us, but
communicating both ways is critical for relationship building. Yeah, and
I do think at some point, you know, there's like
the I'm not a parent, obviously, but I've heard parents
who have complained about how their friends won't buy the
(04:00):
mount places because they have kids. Assume the answers give
me no. I understand the parent feeling that way. As
the single person, I understand not wanting to ask because
rejection does hurt, right, being told no ten times, It's like,
I'm not even gonna ask anymore, and not even in
(04:21):
a bad way. It's like, ah, they have a kid,
it's not gonna work out. So I get that, But
I do you think, Yeah, it is like it's like
any relationship you had to work to maintain it if
their problems always come first, they say, in a healthier friendship,
both parties should feel equally comfortable sharing their challenges and triumphs.
But if your friendship is one sided, you notice their
(04:43):
friend your friend dominates conversation with their issues. Yeah, and
I've had friends in the past where it felt like
they were given basically a ted talk, Right, they were
there to give me a speech, and once their speech
was done, they're done. The conversation it's like, okay, so
just an audience member, you know. At that point, to
(05:07):
the friend, it's like you could have talked to the
wall and have gotten the same response. You know what
I mean, It's like, why am I even here if
they're always too busy? Now, obviously this to me a
bit sensitive a subject because my schedule can be dumb.
They see, everyone has a hectic schedule, but your friend
(05:28):
is always too busy made time for you. It might
be more than just a pat calendar being consistently unavailable
to indicate a lack of prioritization, rather than a genuine
lack of time. That is fair, right, we all make choices. Yeah,
I think that's true. It's funny. I've talked to some
buddies before. There's a buddy I have I'm thinking of.
We'll call them Chris. Chris and I grinded for a
(05:51):
long time and both now gotten into spots where it's
like we're busy. Yeah, we're pretty booked up. We have
another friend we'll call Joey, who doesn't get why we
can't hang out all the time. And it is a little
bit like, you know, to get to where you want
to be or at least where we wanted to be professionally,
we had to kind of sacrifice. And in the industry
(06:12):
we're in, if you're not busy, that's not a good sign.
Like if my schedule clears up and I got a
lot of free time, something went wrong, you know what
I mean, something went horribly wrong. And I think that's
kind of part of the thing to consider too. That one,
I'm a little more about if you feel like you're
walking on eggshells. Yes, they say in a balanced friendship
(06:35):
you should feel like being comfortable being yourself without fear
of judgment or backlash. I think that's fair obviously, especially
if you're afraid you're gonna say something and set them
off or having them shut down. That's a bit of
like an abusive relationship if they always make you feel
like you're doing the wrong thing. With friends, you're supposed
to be a let your guard down, be dumb, and
(06:55):
say things you wouldn't say from other people. You know,
that's supposed to be the the vibe. I hate this.
They make you feel guilty for having other friends. Yeah,
I have friend ones who meet and a buddy, like
to play hockey, like to skate, and so like there'd
be days we would go skate, like after work, go
(07:19):
to the rink, skate, have a good time. We had
another friend who would complain he wasn't invited, but he
doesn't know how to skate, he doesn't have skates. And
it's like, well, you're welcome to come. Well I'm not
gonna skating, all right, Well we're not gonna not skate
because you can't skate, you know what I mean. It's
(07:40):
an odd thing. It's a very possessive thing when that happens.
They say in the healthy friendship, both parties understand, understand
and respect each other's need for multiple social connections. Yeah,
I think that's a weird possessive thing. And I think
everybody has that friend where it's like if they introduce
you to somebody, it's like we guys hung out without me.
It's like, that's a weird. And I always feel like
(08:02):
to you, when you become the possessive friend, you always lose,
you know. When I first moved here, I became friends
with somebody who worked in the promotions department, and she
very nicely introduced me to a bunch of her friends,
and I became friends with those people, and I remember
she got jealous of it and at one point said
she was gonna make them choose between them, between whether
(08:25):
or her or me, And I told her, like, hey,
that's not going to go the way you think. If
you make your friends choose between you and me, it's
not gonna go that way. Number One, I'm awesome. I mean,
we all agree, but too, it's like people don't like
that kind of a choice. It's a very odd spot
to put somebody in. Last one is they're unreliable and
(08:48):
constantly canceled plans. The playing canceling thing, to me is
one of the most annoying things of all time, especially
if it's like a set event. And I'll give an
example if tickets for now will use the capitals like
the capitals, and we confirm are going to the game
a week in advance, and the day of you're like, hey,
I actually can't go. That to me is one of
(09:09):
the most annoying things, especially if it becomes a pattern,
because it's like, yo, just say you don't want to go,
or let me know prior to ten minutes before the event.
You know, I hope you have a great weekend. I
hope to see you tomorrow. Hide Social in Arlington for
Tuesday two thirty to four thirty pm. Huge. Thanks the
lost dog and Can't Rescue. It's gonna be amazing. Timeout
(09:32):
all thee infoymsradio dot com. I'll see you Monday
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