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June 27, 2024 • 15 mins

This episode contains explicit content & themes, and is definitely not one for younger listeners!
Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley are back at it again with more cocktails, more episodes, and way more shenanigans; in this batch of Mid-Winter Cocktail Specials!

The Live Show will be back On-Air from the 15th of July!

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Episode Transcript

Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:01):
Police Haley's mid Winter Christmas Cocktail Special. Welcome to the
Midwinter Christmas Contown Special. Our Big pod is back on
July fifteenths and fatter than ever. Yeah, and also guarantee
show motto I believe also protesta Carwen's birthday on the

(00:23):
day we get back from mid roll down. Yeah, don't
forget my cow as as we've been doing already reading
out listener, Well, we asked you this is your podcast. Yeah,
we can't be coming up with as much content. You
guys got to pull your bloody heads and get something time.
You pulled some way around from you. Some questions. We

(00:44):
asked some questions on a web based page. I think
it's called the Internet. The Internet, Yeah, so much about it.
It's a web based form. We had some questions sort
of thing that you want to say hello to anybody
else that listens to the podcast. What's this exciting thing
that happened to you this year? Do you need advice
on anything? What's juicy? What have you got any regrets

(01:06):
you'd like to get off your chest? And we drink
concktails during and we're still on our first cocktail into
into You'll notice that this this time round, there's a
bit more restraint.

Speaker 2 (01:17):
Hey, look, if you're new here and you haven't listened
to last year's Christmas feel.

Speaker 1 (01:22):
Free and it escalated and went downhill quite rapidly. None
of us have listened because it was too confronting. Yeah,
let's pop up to funer Daniel Melages. Then whould you
like to shout out? He wants to shad out his
hot fiance Josh. Okay, that's our fourth. What does she do?
But well, that's what I was going to say, our fourth.

(01:45):
We had a lot of gay second gay okay, very gay,
look confirmed gay. Get it's the other ones might have devil.
It's not a case of something for me to assume. Yeah,
meaning we do this, we should say you gay question you,
sexuality question mark. He wants to give a shout out
to his hot fiance Josh and Josh and Dan's the

(02:07):
most exciting thing that happened to you this year getting
engaged to my boyfriend. That's when that was exciting in
a while. We don't have any gay winnings on the
horizon do this year? And both really well catered, fabulous,
very well caated, not like the two gay winnings last year.
They were alone, light on food born. You're already in

(02:29):
enough trouble with those guys. What's the greatest regret of
your life? And Daniel, this is a big one. Not
telling my mama was gay before she died nine years ago.
Oh fuck, because I assume you probably thought you had
time up your sleep. Yeah, and they're not getting to
tell her m Is there anything you have? Is there
anything you haven't told your parents that you'll want to

(02:51):
tell them one day? I want to tell my parents
one day, but not yet. So anybody listenings, what did
you do when you're a kid? I broke the shirt
and let my brother take the blame.

Speaker 2 (03:02):
Do you know what va I reckon? They probably know
it will be one of those things that they're like, yeah,
we know.

Speaker 1 (03:06):
But how good was it when you can blame your brother?
It was so good. I saw a thing this week
where it was like when you know, when you were
young and you break something, so you balance it back
as best you could and then back away from it
and let just the next person who touched it let
them believe they broke it. Uh huh.

Speaker 2 (03:20):
I don't think I have anything that I haven't told
my parents. We're pretty we're pretty pretty open. Yeah, I
had a lot of sex in their house without them knowing.

Speaker 1 (03:30):
Early on. You don't think they knew then, and they
justs like I knew, I could tell my mum's face
and yeah, okay, because you're not quite you're not quite
young at me.

Speaker 2 (03:43):
An Arrand when I first started, right, but now I
don't have any secrets I keep from my parents.

Speaker 1 (03:50):
I think there's the chats I wish I had started
as an interesting way of describing your sexual history. I
didn't want to to stand back when when that got
back then when I bloody going up there, and then
just since then, we'll let it be.

Speaker 2 (04:05):
Let it be some advice to pass on to our
other listeners that may be sitting on a secret that
they would love to tell you.

Speaker 1 (04:09):
Yes, yeah, you never know, but then you've got to
wag it up, like what if they don't take it
well and then I don't know that. Yeah, eriends and
it's different. Oh my god, Hailey, Hailey keeps getting chips.
Where it is, it's in the way of the Homers.

Speaker 2 (04:25):
I'm gonna have to move it because movie everything this
moves is so good. No, that's just there, just there
is fine, okay, because I'm left handed.

Speaker 1 (04:32):
Flavors tip. You're dipping into the commas, into a garla
and caramelized. Interesting, interesting and juiciest thing that happened to
you this year, Daniel going out on the farm with
my fiance and have some great sex out on the farm.
I love a little bit of outdoor. We're about to
you on a like a dairy farm. Where about you
having sex on a dairy farm? Would I came around

(04:56):
on the farm, and you've got to pick the place
where not all the neighbors can see, right, and there's
no like ship. Yeah? Yeah, you want to dodge fresh
ego on the on the old hard stuff, not on
the fresh stuff. Laid down a shirt romance? Do you
want to go lay down on a hot dry patch
of dirt and fuck? No? Kind of really, Well, we

(05:20):
were flying up the country just this morning. I was
looking down. We've got a beautiful country, and I was
looking down at sort of the high country farms in
the photo of the mountain. Into my mind, I did beautiful.
I said it to my mum as well, and that
both mothers were equally as impressed. Mountain mountain photos love
a mountain Mums love getting the mountain too. If we
get back to what I was saying about country farms

(05:42):
and I was just getting so isolated. You could get
away with anything on some of those hills. Yeah, yeah,
like what just go up and with a tint and
just take your clothes off and spend the whole weekend.
That'd be lovely and summer you'd want to do in
summer or the whistly winded tea your bones. Yeah, but anyway,
when you was out there banging on the farm. So
congratulations Daniel, and thank you for listening, and thank you

(06:03):
for the correspondence. Congrats Rachel who lives in Huntley lovely
And there's in the White cuttau for we don't go
there anymore. I feel I've forgotten now that we've bypassed it.

Speaker 2 (06:15):
That'd probably quite grateful. I always felt bad for them.
I was like, oh, how sad, no one's going to
go anymore. Yeah, and they're just like, thank.

Speaker 1 (06:20):
God, maybe there's no lines at those fast food restaurants anymore. No, no, no,
how would you like to shout out? Always listen to
the podcast who is It Milking and the Cow Milk
and Cows and the White Cutter to hear you're live
every day love Vorn's vorn Litz vorn Litz, Vaughn's farm
lit chat and subtle positive vibes into the farming community
and making sure the correct messaging gets out there and

(06:41):
can't fail the conversations. But hey, you know me, I'm on,
I'm on Big Fonte truth teller. I'm on Big Dairy Bag.
Up to the whole team. Shout out to my sister
Steff and my childhood best for in Emma, what's the
most exciting thing that happened to this year? I bought
three hundred and fifty cows and went shear milking. Oh shoot,
what's sheer milks? A can? My dad's heard the average

(07:02):
because he sold his this yet valued at just over
two thousand a cow. Yeah.

Speaker 2 (07:06):
So there was a friend who not a friend, but
like we know someone that buys and then you buy
them for.

Speaker 1 (07:11):
Like cheaper, you buy them when they're young, and then you.

Speaker 2 (07:13):
Keep them for the legal amount of time and then
you can sell them for like meat one to two
thousand dollars.

Speaker 1 (07:19):
Yeah, is that like for meat? I don't know what
he sells. How long does he have them? For females
or males. I'm asking a lot of questions, none of these.
I just know that this young he's only seventeen years old. Wow,
when he is illegally trading cows is not illegally trading them.
He bought them, and you raise them and then you
can sell them to like people who will butcher them
and sell them meat I think butchered to eat for me,

(07:42):
or raise them. And then you could buy some young
ones and put them at like Cornwall Park. You can
go back in like a year catching.

Speaker 2 (07:51):
No, you can't because the Cornwell Park farm lands gated
off people own farmed.

Speaker 1 (08:00):
I'll get over the gates and then most people would
notice if more cows turned up, you could kill some
of their cows and for your cows and then going
to my cows. That's a terrible idea and a stupid idea.
So sharemilking is where Emma would own the cows, but
the person would retain ownership of the land and they
split costs and profits fifty to fifty. Here's an idea.

(08:23):
Floating cows, then you don't pay the farmer for the land.
So they're flying. How do they get down to the
grass they first? How are they flying? That's the bigger question.
You don't have to You're still allowed to eat the
gram because it's fear game. I don't know if it is,
but if their legs aren't so never to the ground,
you don't have to pay.

Speaker 2 (08:43):
How much you're paying for this harnessed system in which
you're picking up all of your cows into like slings.

Speaker 1 (08:49):
I don't know many drones v out crowed to a cow.

Speaker 2 (08:52):
That's a lot of money. I don't think it's worth it.
You're better buying land.

Speaker 1 (08:56):
Or eating seagulls. That is everye the cows eating seagulls,
or if the cow no, I don't think that would
be great and that would be the start of the
next well the meat. Well, look, I'm just trying to
bring Sky some ideas. We asked Rachel what she needs
advice on, and she said, finding a husband. Okay, all
these all these gays are taking up all the area

(09:18):
on the farms, aren't they. God, no wonder she everybody
was worried about foreign buyers. It's the gays we've got
to be worried about. I don't know. I don't have
any advice. We've been to get it too long. You're
a hard working woman in the dairy industry. To mention,
there'd be many single dairy farmers out there looking for
exactly what you've got, Billboard, exactly what you've got. I'm

(09:41):
a hard working farm woman coming in. Is wanted for
this hard work in Sheila? Yeah, yeah, get that up
on the side of the get that up on the
side of the Royal Thanks Rachel and from Huntley, she
would we go all the way to northern Ireland. Oh yes,
this is our first international shout out, lightly light. We

(10:01):
have upset Ireland of late. Yeah we have Victoria Wilson
is messaging on from Belfast and Nora in Ireland. Good morning,
I who would you like to shoot out the top
of the morning. Do you think she's been on air lingers? Maybe? Okay,
I'm the woman with a pretty handwriting. I seem to
postcard the last few times. Oh my god, I remember

(10:23):
just beauty, do you know? I always remember her handwriting
and that girl we used to work with years ago,
Rachel Langford. Amazing because Rachel's handwriting looked like a print out,
looked like it was beautiful. To her birthday on Facebook,
always wash her Happy birthday to her and her handwriting
and for the last ten years, she said, say something different.

(10:44):
What else do you know about that? You know me,
but do you judge me? Cowen's for many su because
it's his PTO. But there's no pto. It's his No. Noah,
my god, run out of would like you has to
shout it. I'm the woman the pretty hetero set post cards.

(11:06):
The last few Christmas is the end and then that's
the next page. Oh no, oh no, so oh no,
oh my god, miss miss Ireland. Oh oh, you have
a little bit of a Look, we're going to come back.

(11:27):
We're going to come back to Victoria. Is pt over?
What pages? It all? It's at the end of the
second film, doesn't waiting music? Oh love it? End of
the second page? Yes, it is the moder Then when
you got the top, so he doesn't finish. It doesn't finish?
Does that? Oh my god? Was that that was a yeah?
Goodness to three? Okay, well, I'll tell you what. Come
back to you, Victoria, dear, We'll come back and we'll

(11:50):
see if we can finish. Then I don't know who
they belonged to. Oh god, do you think that's Do
you think that's the end of Victoria's just yeah, probably
the last year presses because she who would you like
us to shout out? But she didn't say anyone, And
I expected the next pact to be shut some of them. Okay, Okay,
there wasn't. You just didn't read it right. I just

(12:11):
didn't read it right. Wow, there was no full stop there.
There was no full stops full stop. What we're hearing
is that some of our dear listeners didn't use full stops.
So it's okay, has passed the blame to the listeners there, Yeah,

(12:36):
stand by, stand by. Should we bitch about Fletch? Okay, God,
he's welcome to the Fletch bitch helpline.

Speaker 2 (12:45):
Okay, we've just actually traveled with Fletch. It's he's very organized,
but it's almost friend.

Speaker 1 (12:51):
We're fucking running. Literally, I was not that big welcome
the show beautiful, believable. I know that very rude. Assume
that it was Victoria's message. You see, what's the most
exciting thing that happened to this year? She got married? Ah,

(13:14):
and I was the most perfect day. That's lovely, that's
absolutely lovely. What do you need advice? Sign? Victoria said,
I'd like to know how to handle when a work
colleague is negative about every little thing. It's very draining.
You're not negative about he said, Why don't you look
at me like you're just eyeballing me, Like I'm the problem.

Speaker 2 (13:36):
What you do is you try to make them laugh,
and you tickle and you give them naughty gestures.

Speaker 1 (13:42):
You give them a reason to live. You wake up
every day. I'm on the bum what the negative them
might be? Like, No, I don't like that. We do
know these kind of people. You know, every single thing
is just bad. So I don't know from across the phone,
how do you mine gave them into yeahgeous, just having

(14:04):
a good time. Yeah's plant of sea. Yeah. I just
kind of notice like this week, like everything you've said
it has been quite negative. You know, you're okay, is
there anything I can do? What about if they don't
know they're even doing it? So you kept a little
tally negative thoughts around the office, But like, guys, I've
just noticed everybody there's been a bit of a negative vibe.
I'm going to start keeping a track of making a problem. Yeah,

(14:27):
you're making everybody's problem. And then there's lots up there
and everyone's like, but I can't remember the thing negative
and then be like, oh, well maybe we should we
break it down to see who. That's too personal. It's
too personal. I think just asking them you're right is everything? Okay? Yeah,
keeping a negative versus possibly and then have a chat
and then to see you're so fucking training. Yeah, do

(14:47):
you have like you? I find you put your life
out of this environment. You are a ball ache. Yeah,
that's great advice. Great, great advice from us, great advice
worthy of a horse. Quite a loss in a calendar
quote that one Kelsey's next for a shout out episode. Yeah,
we're gonna I'm ready for a new drunk. Actually, if

(15:10):
you could just keep an eye on the time, like
we said, I couldn't see the time. I was behind
the bag of chips. Oh so that was Haley's fault,
was that I'll move the chat there. I could see
it there. Actually, Yes, Okay, now we've reached the grange
the timer, and we're ready for the next episode.
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