📻Jerry's Towels - The Radio Show

Today on the Show Jerry and Manaia auctioned off Jerry's old towels...

Plus we have another Mastermind Situation on our hands...

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:00):
The Hodache breakfast, load up on landscaping with Bunning's train.
That's right, it's Wednesday morning. It's jes Are and the
Boner from six to nine this morning, nine o'clock will
be out the door and home. Welcome on to the show.
Jermmy Wells, this is a nice.

Speaker 2 (00:14):
Morning, Jerry morning, read it morning mate.

Speaker 3 (00:16):
Zoe out in the studio.

Speaker 2 (00:17):
B how mild by the way this morning, Jeseu, it
was a barmie sort of felt like thirteen degrees this morning.

Speaker 1 (00:24):
Well, it's exactly what it is, thirteen point time and
I how that night? But what is Zoe? Who's woman
in the phones as Dob? She's wrapped up? Oh man?
How many layers zoey for four? Well for fourteen degrees?

Speaker 3 (00:39):
Whoa four for fourteen?

Speaker 1 (00:41):
Are you reverse engineering your clothing so the warm where
it gets the more layers you wear.

Speaker 3 (00:46):
Yeah, middle of summer she's going to have sixteen layers on.

Speaker 1 (00:49):
That's weird. It's going to be. It's going to be
a real trick to watch that is we are you
wearing a man nappy in there?

Speaker 4 (00:53):
Zoe?

Speaker 2 (00:54):
Okay, no man, we'll get into man nappy's later on.
I think as the man is the man still I.

Speaker 1 (01:01):
Want to know. I mean, I'd love to give Reverend
Paul Fletcher a call. He's the guy one of the
priests that's outside Nikola Willis's office chained himself to the
office store trying to get a meeting with Nicha Willis.
Nikola Willis over the gaza situation.

Speaker 3 (01:13):
Changed himself for the man. Nappy are they jud just specific?
Also Fellers just a quick.

Speaker 1 (01:19):
Algos here they are?

Speaker 3 (01:20):
Are they?

Speaker 1 (01:21):
Well? Think about where the pet needs to be?

Speaker 2 (01:23):
Well, I would have thought all the way around. Again,
I don't know.

Speaker 1 (01:27):
You never want a man now?

Speaker 3 (01:28):
No, I'm not one of the Pois boys.

Speaker 1 (01:30):
We need to get into this next.

Speaker 4 (01:32):
Jerry and then the Hurdarchy Breakfast.

Speaker 3 (01:35):
Sound the Punishing Golf channel on.

Speaker 2 (01:36):
But yesterday Jerry and I got out for a round
of golf at a golf course on the north shore
of Auckland in New Zealand.

Speaker 1 (01:44):
It was was it or was it actually on the
Hurache planes or was it on the Canterbury planes.

Speaker 2 (01:50):
Well I can guarantee it wasn't on the Canterbury plains
of Auckland, New Zealand.

Speaker 1 (01:55):
It was like a piece of the Canterbury planes had
moved its way.

Speaker 2 (01:58):
To Aukland felt that way, except it's a floodplain somewhere
because it was squabed as well. This golf course is
one of those urban golf courses where they've managed to
pack in somehow eighteen holes onto what's quite clearly nine
holes worth of ground. There's one point there where about
six fairways converge on each other.

Speaker 3 (02:16):
It's known as Sniper's alli.

Speaker 2 (02:18):
The g the gars are strip and you've just got
to look left, right, up down.

Speaker 3 (02:21):
People are yelling at your four.

Speaker 1 (02:24):
Four.

Speaker 2 (02:24):
Is not a helpful thing to yell, by the way
on a golf course, because all it does is alert
everyone that someone's about to get hurt. And it's like,
which one of us, yeah, because someone will say four left,
but I'm standing three fairways overfaced in the wrong direction.

Speaker 1 (02:37):
Yeah. Well, this is the second time I've played this
course in a week. And the last time i played
this course, all of us were teeing off from the
Gaza strip and we were going towards path three, and
every single one of us yelled four yeah on our
te shot. We sprayed it into the people who are
waiting on the next team. At one point there are
as you said, sixties and greens that converge on each other.

Speaker 3 (02:59):
Yeah, it's ridiculous.

Speaker 1 (03:01):
There's people walking across your fear away, there's boomers. Someone
suggested that they actually need some kind of medical kiosk
in the middle of the course. Yea treos where they
do bandages and they atend to to bruisism and cuts.

Speaker 3 (03:18):
A mass in it.

Speaker 2 (03:20):
Patient is in his late sixties. He's presented with head
trauma and lacerations to the temple. All right, get him
in first. This guy's rollers ackle, he can wait. That's
the kind of course we're dealing with. And yesterday, Jerry,
something happened to me that hasn't happened in a long time,
and you witnessed it.

Speaker 3 (03:34):
And I'm glad you were there to see it.

Speaker 2 (03:37):
Yesterday for the first time, Oh jeez, and probably since
my early twenties, certainly since my unie days.

Speaker 3 (03:44):
I turned a man yesterday.

Speaker 1 (03:45):
Yeah, I witnessed. I witnessed you turning a man. Yeah,
it was quite something to see.

Speaker 2 (03:50):
I haven't done it. I haven't done it, and a
lot I didn't know I still had it in me.
I didn't know if I could still turn a man,
you know. You turned them right, and I created the
big brown slim dot. I think that's got a lot
to do with Oh yeah, because I haven't turned heads
in a long time.

Speaker 3 (04:03):
In a long long time, Jerry.

Speaker 1 (04:05):
Yeah. I was like, you're whacked off, and then all
of a sudden you turned him in.

Speaker 2 (04:08):
Yeah, and look, I've seen that happen. Hell, it's happened
to me. People have done it to me, but for
me to walk out onto a golf course and do
it to another man, I've been working really hard lately,
and I think it's starting to pay off on the tee.
On the I think seventh hole was a long part four.
They just hit their second shot and I teed off,

(04:29):
and I've managed to iron my I still have a slice,
but I've ironed it out to bear the slices only
as wide as a fairway, so I can actually keep
playing the sucker.

Speaker 3 (04:36):
And I played too the slice.

Speaker 2 (04:37):
Yeah, And I laced one and it right up on
the heels of the old copper in front of us,
and it passed him off so much that he turned
around and.

Speaker 3 (04:45):
Shot us a filthy look.

Speaker 1 (04:46):
He turned around. Yeah, And immediately I said, you turn
You turned him? Yeah, you turned that man.

Speaker 2 (04:52):
And I haven't turned a man on a golf course,
and oh god, I can't remember the last time.

Speaker 1 (04:56):
So good for me. But it was within safe distance. Yeah,
I mean that's the thing. You were probably what ten
meters away from actually hitting him?

Speaker 2 (05:03):
Well, were it landed, Yeah, definitely, and then I might
have rolled up to within a few meters. But yeah,
so I really I really found something. We played the
back nine lane and I, oh yeah, and there was
the most vicious dog leg right that that like would
not fly on any other course.

Speaker 1 (05:20):
I know that.

Speaker 5 (05:21):
I know that hole booted it, did you know? Because
of the slice. Because of the slice. I was just like, oh,
roll the eyes at the back of the head. Hit
this one like a boomerang around the corner. Yeah, and
straight under the green. Sunk it.

Speaker 1 (05:33):
Part three, Ah, free shots, suck You were on fire.
I was.

Speaker 3 (05:38):
I was actually I was cooking.

Speaker 1 (05:40):
He was. He was just he's playing with that slice.
He nose the slice. He knows his game.

Speaker 2 (05:44):
Well what I've always said, Jarry, two things with golf.
Why if you suck suck fast? Two, got to dance
with who you came with. Gott to dance with who
you came with. If you came with a nasty slice.
Then you get a dance now in the in the
interim between rounds. Don't get yourself a nicer girlfriend. Sure
I under slice out, straighten one out. You don't get
a longer drive or whatever. But for the time you're

(06:05):
on the course, you get a dance with tha game with.

Speaker 1 (06:08):
You've come a long way because you were being accused
as you started the round of being all shoes. Yes,
because you've got those beautiful new any ass golf shoes.

Speaker 2 (06:17):
Oh the more technology in that in the rocket that
landed Neil Armstrong on the moon.

Speaker 1 (06:21):
But the are the things that have I think started
you on this path.

Speaker 2 (06:23):
Well they were big shoes to fill, Jerry, but I
think now I can say I'm filling them.

Speaker 4 (06:27):
Jerry and Midnight the hold Ikey breakfasts.

Speaker 6 (06:30):
The history of Yesterday, Today, Tomorrow, Temail.

Speaker 3 (06:34):
Today is the seventeenth of September.

Speaker 2 (06:36):
That is a Wednesday, for those of you who are
just waking up and shaking the crust out of your
eyes on this day. In nineteen forty one, flogging and
whipping abolished as punishments in New Zealand.

Speaker 1 (06:45):
Yeah, ill tell you what the day nineteen forty one.
On this day, things took a turn for the worst
as far as I'm concerned, right the day they got
rid of flogging and whipping, Well, whipping, I can understand.

Speaker 2 (06:56):
I don't think anybody should be whipped, but flogging, Jerry,
I think our nation was built on.

Speaker 3 (07:00):
The backs of the people being flogged.

Speaker 1 (07:02):
Well, look, one person's flag is another person's smack. Yeah
that's right.

Speaker 2 (07:05):
A lot of people calling you a smack. Yeah, I'm
sure houlding you a flogged.

Speaker 7 (07:09):
What's the difference between flogging and whipping? Because I just
thought they were the same thing.

Speaker 1 (07:13):
So flogging is with a stick, whipping is with a
whip man, I got flogged as a kid. You don't
want I mean I never got whipped. Well, I did
get whacked with a metal coat hanger once around the
back of the legs. God, I'll never forget that. That
really hurts.

Speaker 3 (07:27):
Melted. You ever get belted?

Speaker 1 (07:28):
No, there was never about there on spoons, There was
a lot of hands, There was a lot, there was
the coat, the metal coat hanger once.

Speaker 3 (07:36):
That one stings.

Speaker 2 (07:37):
Yeah, but never about And what about yourself?

Speaker 3 (07:39):
As a parent, You ever flogg your kids?

Speaker 8 (07:41):
No?

Speaker 3 (07:41):
You ever whipped them in the ankle. The raise is good.

Speaker 1 (07:43):
It's it's been illegal since nineteen forty one.

Speaker 3 (07:46):
It's a good point. A lot of things are legal too.

Speaker 2 (07:50):
I used to get taken over to the to the oven,
and above the oven was a like a like a
bunch of hangers, and they would have like a ladle
and a fish slice and a wooden spoon and all
this shit, and then Nana would just be like pack
one ooh. And so you know, for the first sort
of four weeks, I'd go through and just like test
them all out, like the lad was a bit unwieldy, and.

Speaker 3 (08:09):
Man his hand.

Speaker 2 (08:11):
But every now and then she gets a bit of
purchase on that thing.

Speaker 1 (08:14):
First, I don't want to specialize. That thing's got whipped,
you know what the barbie boss. No, it's got rated.

Speaker 3 (08:19):
But no, you definitely don't want the barbie boss.

Speaker 1 (08:21):
Now.

Speaker 2 (08:21):
I settled on wooden spoon. One of them broke ones,
and she felt so bad. So I was like, ah,
this is a two inch sword that would spoon. Just
seventeen men were flogged, receiving between ten and fifteen strokes
of the Cats nine tales between nineteen nineteen and nineteen
thirty five. The last flogging took place until nineteen thirty six.
US under sixteen could be whipped for a wider variety

(08:42):
offenses than.

Speaker 3 (08:42):
Adults and practice.

Speaker 2 (08:44):
The punishment was imposed on boys, mainly for theft, breaking
and entering wilful damage. Death penalty for murder was also
temporarily stopped, and it was reintroduced in nineteen fifty.

Speaker 3 (08:53):
Flogging was not funny.

Speaker 2 (08:55):
You were talking about the mash in it on the
golf course during because in nineteen seventy two, Mash debuts
and not form a button pusher from this show Mash.

Speaker 1 (09:05):
No, he wasn't even a Glinton. His parents, Saucy, Sexy
Susie and Gordy's Eye.

Speaker 2 (09:11):
Adapted from the nineteen seventy movie of the same name,
made household names out of stars like Ellen Elder and
Larta Switt. Ran for eleven years, won fourteen Emmy Awards,
and I Feel Like replayed on New Zealand television for
about I remember watching it as a kid.

Speaker 3 (09:25):
I must have seen any repisode.

Speaker 1 (09:26):
Oh, we kept going Clinger. Clinger was always trying to
get away. Remember Clinger was the guy that was trying
to do weird things by dressing up as women as
a woman to try and get out. Is that his name?
Hot hot? Yeah, hot hot lips. She didn't have hot
legs legs yeah, but hot lips her personally, I knew hers.

Speaker 3 (09:44):
Yep, that's what I always knew as So.

Speaker 2 (09:47):
Yeah, that was nineteen seventy two hundred and six million viewers,
three of them sitting in this studio, seventy seven percent
share of the viewing audience at the time.

Speaker 1 (09:53):
Because that finale and eighty three, that's still people still
talk about that. The greatest of a day in television.
I was watched.

Speaker 2 (10:00):
Television episode of all time nineteen seventy seven. Fleetwood Mac's
Rumors album is number one for the ninth consecutive week
in the US charts. For some reason, my algorithm is
full of Fleetwood Mac memes at the moment. It's all
videos about like what are their names again? They were
together and then broke.

Speaker 1 (10:19):
Mcveie, Yeah, next Steve, next year, yeah right, they were
all together at soon point. They were, and I think
make Fleetwood even was getting in there were worth worth
Steve Stevie at one point.

Speaker 2 (10:33):
But it was basically Love Island with musical talent, so
trashy reality TV show with just insane musical ability.

Speaker 1 (10:42):
Turns out breaking up, which was what was happening when
they were recording the Rumors album. Really does make good music.

Speaker 2 (10:48):
Should we all give our respective partners the flick? And
if it's to improve the quality of the.

Speaker 1 (10:52):
Show, I think maybe give them float you go again.

Speaker 2 (10:55):
So you go first, and then we'll all figure it
out from there to see how it goes and.

Speaker 7 (10:59):
Swap them around.

Speaker 2 (11:00):
She's giving us the big nod, so that's good. Looks
like she's gonna do that anyway. Born on this day,
Keith Flint from the Prodigy.

Speaker 1 (11:09):
Can't play that game? Oh great? New Zealander died in
twenty nineteen.

Speaker 2 (11:13):
Gone too Soon, don way too soon, Way way too soon.
Also born on this day. She has a voice box
with Kermitt the Frog. It's Patrick Mahomes, quarterback for the
Kansas City Chiefs of Bowl Champion and MVP thirty Today.

Speaker 3 (11:24):
Also owned to Today and actor John Riddard.

Speaker 2 (11:27):
He's known for the TV shows Three's Company and Eight
Simple Rules.

Speaker 1 (11:30):
Oh I love the show. This is the original theme.
Mister Fairley was my favorite character, and actually mister Roper
who was the landlord who they lived on. Because Three's
Company it was Jack Ridder and Chrissy and Janet I
think was the other character. And they lived together in

(11:51):
a house. And of course in those days you couldn't
have a man living with two women. Oh you could
have a man living with two women.

Speaker 2 (11:56):
Very ridiculous unmarried comedy ensue, Yeah, so comedy.

Speaker 1 (11:59):
And as they hid the fact that they were, he
pretended to be in a relationship with them. That was
the whole gag of the whole thing.

Speaker 7 (12:08):
I read a little bit about Three's Company this morning,
because I don't really remember watching it. Did he pretend
to be John Rittan? Did he pretend to be a homseection?

Speaker 1 (12:15):
Oh? Was he pretending to be? There was I think
rumors about that the ruse that was.

Speaker 7 (12:20):
Maybe, and the landlord was like, oh gosh, were near me? Yeah,
I could catch it.

Speaker 1 (12:26):
The funny thing about mister Roper, who was the landlord
is he was the only person who was allowed to
look at the camera, so he used to break He
used to break the fourth wall all the time, so
he'd make a comment about his wife. It was always
about his wife, Missus Roper, and then he would look
and go and smile and sort of not his head
at the camera. Like, aren't I right? People?

Speaker 3 (12:44):
You guys get it. You know what I'm talking about.

Speaker 1 (12:46):
It's really funny when he watched it beat now.

Speaker 2 (12:48):
I remember him from eight Simple Rules. I feel like
the mum died in the middle of that. I felt
like that was quite traumatic.

Speaker 3 (12:52):
That was my era.

Speaker 2 (12:53):
Oh yeah, okay, and eight civil rules for dating my
teenage daughter, I think is what the show was called.

Speaker 3 (12:58):
I don't think you could make that today.

Speaker 1 (13:00):
In two thousand and three, Genredder.

Speaker 3 (13:02):
Gone far too soon. And that is the history of yesterday. Today.

Speaker 2 (13:05):
It's right tomorrow for Wednesdays, seventeenth September twenty five.

Speaker 1 (13:10):
Now I'm gonna get on the gurgle and gurgle mister
Roper locks to camera.

Speaker 4 (13:15):
Jurry in the night the hold ikey breakfast.

Speaker 1 (13:18):
Time for your latest sport headlines. Thanks to export Ultra
the beer for here. High jumper Hamish Kerr has leapt
two point three six meters to wear New Zealand a
second gold medal at the World Athletics Champs in Tokyo.
The twenty nine year old now has a full house
of titles, having also won at the Olympics, Commonwealth Games,
World Indoor Champs and Diamond League Final.

Speaker 2 (13:41):
I guess the only one he hasn't got is the
Monu Champs. That's probably the last title that he needs
to complete the set, isn't it.

Speaker 1 (13:48):
He just goes straight through the water. Would need like
a pin drop. Yeah, he's a good pin drop. He
do a devastating pin drop. Then he has a pin kurse.
Trump followed the three thousand meters steeplechase victory by Jordy
Bear Beamish, making the meat the most successful for New
Zealand and twenty editions dating back to nineteen eighty three.

Speaker 3 (14:08):
Oh yeah, give them a taste.

Speaker 2 (14:09):
Oh man, imagine that on the chuck us on the
per capita for the World Championships will be obliterating.

Speaker 1 (14:15):
It's over. What a run from Jordy Beamish. Yeah, Oh
tremendous the pace at the end to beat the Moroccan.
The Moroccan didn't see him coming.

Speaker 2 (14:21):
Oh kid can kick can chat a bit of steeple
boy canny.

Speaker 1 (14:26):
New Zealand captain Mitchell Santner's recovery from a hernia means
he will most next month's three match T twenty home
cricket series against Australia. The Beast Michael Braceball will skip
of the side in this place.

Speaker 2 (14:38):
Is a hernia an old man's injury?

Speaker 1 (14:40):
Or no? It feels pretty old man, It does, doesn't it.
I felt a hernia coming on about two months ago.
It turns out it didn't happen. It didn't eventuate, it abated. Yeah,
but I did feel very old when I thought this
is a hernia. I think I'm getting here.

Speaker 2 (14:56):
Yeah, that's one of those markets. You're like, Oh Jesus,
it's done about hemorrhoids.

Speaker 1 (15:02):
That's another one.

Speaker 2 (15:03):
Yeah, hemorrhoids. Well, there's not necessarily an old man's game.

Speaker 1 (15:06):
If I had hemorrhoids, I don't know.

Speaker 2 (15:08):
I'm just saying it's not necessarily a market that you
might be an old man, you know what I mean?

Speaker 3 (15:11):
Young people can get hemorhoids.

Speaker 7 (15:12):
Sure can.

Speaker 1 (15:14):
Oh, really, you had hemorrhoids? Mate? When if I haven't
had oh you've always got hemorrhoids?

Speaker 7 (15:19):
Well not look not always.

Speaker 1 (15:20):
But they're running a bunch of grapes all the time.
I reckon budge.

Speaker 7 (15:24):
Early twenties was the first time I made to go
to the doctor about it.

Speaker 1 (15:27):
It was very I imagine you being a vigorous wiper.
I think that's the problem. Isn't it.

Speaker 3 (15:33):
Yeah, Yeah, that'll be just ease.

Speaker 1 (15:35):
Up on the one play and Roger to of us
a Shick and up here In Nickols have won the
respective men's and women's Player of the Year gongs at
the Warriors end of season two. Nineteen year old like
a Halosimus secured the Rookie of the Year title and
the Peaceful People's Choice.

Speaker 2 (15:51):
Yeah, I've gotta be honest. Roger to us Shik the
deserving winner of that. Aaron Clark just as deserving. I
would say that's mannering middle. I think he has been
probably our best player this year, only partly due to
injuries as well.

Speaker 3 (16:06):
Look, Metcalfe is on track to win.

Speaker 2 (16:07):
The Deli m but obviously got scrubbed out with that
ac I say, Mitch Barnett, but yeah, I feel like
Erin Clark's had an excellent season.

Speaker 1 (16:14):
I think you're right. I think it was Roger and
Aaron going here.

Speaker 2 (16:17):
You got to wonder because there's rumors about Roger deficting
back to the Rugby Union for this new Rugby whatever
that competition is that they're talking about the Saudi back
one three p.

Speaker 1 (16:26):
Sixty.

Speaker 2 (16:27):
He's one of the names that's linked to that is
he You got to wonder if it's like there's not
mannering medalists.

Speaker 3 (16:32):
Mate, you can't leave.

Speaker 1 (16:33):
He got good such good feet goes on?

Speaker 2 (16:37):
Did it good side step on Roger to bus shack
here again.

Speaker 3 (16:42):
Amazing, incredibly amazing.

Speaker 8 (16:45):
Jerry Andman Night the Hotarchy breakfast yesterday.

Speaker 2 (16:48):
Jeremy, you did me a wonderful solid by bringing in
four towels. You've you checked your cupboard, You've got forty
something towels. I've just ripped two of my toils in half,
and so you thought ill bring in a couple of
towers and the great towels.

Speaker 1 (17:00):
Thank you.

Speaker 2 (17:01):
But I took those home and was informed that they
no longer fit the color scheme of our of our
bathroom decor.

Speaker 1 (17:07):
Unfortunately, what teal off teal A worn beige and darker
beige don't fit the color scheme of your house.

Speaker 3 (17:17):
Not quite.

Speaker 2 (17:17):
No, they don't quite fit into what we've got going
on at home.

Speaker 1 (17:21):
This is a very nineties color scheme.

Speaker 3 (17:23):
I've got to say, it was a very nineties color scheme. Yeah.

Speaker 2 (17:26):
There was also a part of using a second hand
towel every single day that I think was a little
off putting to the interior decorator of my house.

Speaker 1 (17:34):
Aren't all tail's second hand?

Speaker 2 (17:36):
Yeah, But when they're your hand, you know, that's one thing.
When there's someone else's hands, I suppose that's I suppose
that's a whole other thing. And so I thought, you
know what, why don't we pass these on to that
There must be someone out there who could do with
four towels.

Speaker 3 (17:51):
So I thought, I'll check them on Facebook marketplace.

Speaker 2 (17:53):
But I don't want them to just go into any
old random so I've chucked them on our own Facebook marketplace,
the Conclave. So the Conclave is the private hierarchy Facebook
Hierarchy Breakfast Facebook page which.

Speaker 3 (18:03):
You can join now.

Speaker 2 (18:04):
Just look up the Conclave and I've listed them selling
off four times. Jeremy Wells used towels on the Show Tomorrow,
late nineteen nineties. High Kat, no RIDGIOE. Send in your
beasted off as below, excepting goods and or services only
as as wearers, no low ballers.

Speaker 3 (18:18):
I know what I've got.

Speaker 1 (18:19):
Well, they are for well well worn, as you said, towels.
But I'll tell you what they dry those towels. Oh
they do.

Speaker 2 (18:25):
Yeah, as we talked about yesterday the crispy of the towel,
the better it's going to dry.

Speaker 1 (18:30):
I found and these are launded. These are fully laundered towels,
drug clean. They are not dry clean, but they are
cleaned and they are fabric softened. Yeah.

Speaker 2 (18:38):
So I've put that on the conclave and ask people
to send in their office, and I'd employ you to
do so on three four, eight, three or eight hundred
Hardaki as well. By the end of the show today,
whoever offers us the best trade, we'll get those towels.
Hamish got on the conclave and said we'll swap all
four towels for the flat ear fryer. One owner heavily

(18:59):
thrashed by at least six blokes. Never been clean pick
up Perth.

Speaker 1 (19:02):
You come to me, problematic running over? Okay?

Speaker 3 (19:07):
The front runner, Tyler wants to know have they been
on the low balls?

Speaker 1 (19:11):
Yeah, of course they have being washed.

Speaker 2 (19:15):
Carl wants to know, would you trade for a yus
Jason Hoyt Merkin from the hit nineteen ninety five series
Xena Warrior Princess, and William wants to know clean or dirty?

Speaker 3 (19:25):
Obviously duck clean. We know that.

Speaker 2 (19:27):
So it takes through three four oh, three, what can
you offer us?

Speaker 3 (19:30):
What we what are we in the market for?

Speaker 6 (19:31):
Joe?

Speaker 3 (19:31):
What do you want?

Speaker 1 (19:32):
This text here says shingles. So someone's offered us shngles
for the towels. I'd rather not have shingles, roofing shingles
or I think probably shingles the disease. Yeah, okay, well,
maybe that text is from when we were talking about
old man diseases before.

Speaker 2 (19:47):
Or perhaps they want they want to know if the
towels are carrying any diseases.

Speaker 1 (19:52):
No fleas nets. Look, there have been nets in our
household at certain times, and they're actually currently nets.

Speaker 7 (20:00):
I probably should have put cent we've.

Speaker 1 (20:03):
Currently got a spade of nets. We're only ever like
six months away from a spade of nets in our house.
We've got two females with long hair in our house.

Speaker 2 (20:12):
I probably should have put that in the listing. Someone's
going to give me a bad review on Marketplace.

Speaker 1 (20:17):
I'm not sure the nets have been a lot. Nets
don't like.

Speaker 2 (20:19):
Towels, Yeah, okay, you know that's nuts like here, but
may have nets, but they don't like the towels.

Speaker 1 (20:26):
No, either, I don't think they like late nineties looking towels.
They don't like that. They don't like the teal.

Speaker 2 (20:32):
Someone said a good day out into Poe. They're offering
a good day out into pose. Fabric softness. Is this
text is Towe suicide?

Speaker 3 (20:39):
Yeah it is.

Speaker 2 (20:39):
That's why crispy, because the crispy of the towel, the
bitter adrosier so ferris soft. I think the ear fryer.
So far, but we've got the rest of the show
to get your your office in. But right now it
looks like we're flying a Perth to pick up and uncleaned.

Speaker 1 (20:53):
Right okay, yeah, I mean they're sitting on the disc
at the moment and one of that they are four
of as you said before forty five.

Speaker 3 (21:01):
Yeah, I mean this could go well and you might
have yourself a lucrative business.

Speaker 1 (21:04):
Jar I've got some other thing. I've got sheets as well.
They don't need to get away.

Speaker 4 (21:07):
I think Jerry and Mina the hold Ikey breakfast.

Speaker 1 (21:11):
It's time to get on the paperwork. This is where
we look over the New Zealand Herald. Story's making news,
so you don't actually have to The big news story
for me are these priests that are currently protesting outside
Finance Minister Nikola Willis's office. They've chained themselves to the door.

Speaker 3 (21:27):
Well, I mean, surely that's an easy fact. It's just
bolt cutter.

Speaker 1 (21:31):
Well, they've changed themselves to the door and they will
not leave until Nichola Willis has a meeting with them
over gaza.

Speaker 3 (21:38):
Okay, why Nichola Willis? What chi can do?

Speaker 1 (21:41):
Don't know. She's the finance minister, she's got some money.
I don't actually know, Christians.

Speaker 3 (21:48):
So hold on, there's something to do with nappies in there. Yeah.

Speaker 1 (21:52):
Well this is the interesting part really. I mean the
rest of it's pretty boring. But the fact that Reverend
Paul Fletcher so on social media. He went on because
people say, well, how are you going to go to
the toilet? And that was a reasonable question. How you
going to be your a blution?

Speaker 3 (22:04):
Yeah? Would you chain to the thing?

Speaker 1 (22:05):
Yeah? And I think what most normal people would have
said was, well, we'll just go to the toilet and
then come back and rechain ourselves.

Speaker 3 (22:13):
Would just be there for enough to make our statement.

Speaker 1 (22:15):
And go Yeah. But no, he's wearing an adult nappy
and he posted that online.

Speaker 2 (22:22):
Right, Oh, so he posted that he was just like,
I just want everyone to know that I've got the.

Speaker 3 (22:27):
Nappy on, Yeah, he's wearing a man now. I don't
have kids, Erry.

Speaker 2 (22:30):
One thing I do know about napp is is you
don't just put one on and then you're sorted. How
many nappies does a baby generally go through on a day,
quite a few, four or five, four or five, So
it's more than just on the age. They don't just
chuck one on and then you're sweet for a day. Now,
obviously he's going to have a bit of control over
his bodily functions, so maybe he's not going to need

(22:53):
to as much.

Speaker 1 (22:53):
Is he doing number twos as.

Speaker 2 (22:55):
He on the metal music? And these are the issues,
So I don't know. I will say I would hate
to have a man in a nappy change to my door.

Speaker 1 (23:05):
Well, Nicola Wallis has come out and said her quote was,
I will not be sitting a president that the way
to get a meeting with me is to don an
adult nappy and change yourself to my door.

Speaker 7 (23:16):
For some people that would really be a deal breaker.

Speaker 3 (23:19):
Oh the one hundred percent.

Speaker 2 (23:20):
And I think the dangerous president there is if she
does except the meeting, how many people is she going
to have change to her door in nappy's tomorrow.

Speaker 1 (23:28):
You know what I mean.

Speaker 3 (23:29):
This is the problem.

Speaker 2 (23:30):
You can't you can't give a toy to a screaming
toddler because you're just teaching them.

Speaker 3 (23:34):
This is how you get you ay.

Speaker 1 (23:36):
But the other problem is it some stage, even if
you do do you hold on and you just go
on and your man nappy some stage you've got to
change that, man. I mean, that's not that's exactly. It's
not gonna stay. You know, it bunches up but gets
very heavy the nappy. I mean all fathers and mothers
out there will know at certain stages when toddler's been
running around and really done a lot of wheeze in

(23:57):
the nappy, she can.

Speaker 2 (23:58):
Get very ssacky. Yes, someone said, Helen nappy rash. If
I did that to my child, it'll be outraged. And
hope she's got some pseudo cream ready for the meeting.

Speaker 1 (24:05):
Oh the old pseudo cream or the panthon that was
that was that loomed large over over my child.

Speaker 7 (24:12):
A little bit of their childhood vs.

Speaker 6 (24:15):
Yeah.

Speaker 3 (24:15):
I think I think we some vess, don't.

Speaker 1 (24:19):
We were big on the pseudo cream, big on the
pseudo That stuff will get on your clothes and it
doesn't ever come out.

Speaker 2 (24:25):
What would it take for you to put Donna man
nappy and chain yourself to your local politicians door?

Speaker 1 (24:30):
Jerry, Hell of a lot.

Speaker 2 (24:32):
I think if Jermaine Ross doesn't get elected to the
way so I could arrange his local board, then I'll
be chaining myself to the door.

Speaker 1 (24:38):
Yeah, I reckon half a million dollars?

Speaker 7 (24:41):
What I do anything else in there?

Speaker 3 (24:45):
Guys, We're just a man.

Speaker 2 (24:46):
Sorry, I got short circuited on the didn't really read
any further, to be honest.

Speaker 1 (24:53):
Yeah, okay, that's enough of that.

Speaker 6 (24:56):
I think.

Speaker 1 (24:58):
Sometimes you just gotta put in the first and pull
out of the park text on three four A three.

Speaker 2 (25:04):
We'll take those towels in exchange for not chaining myself
to your door and a bluting my nappy.

Speaker 1 (25:09):
Why should send the towels down to them?

Speaker 8 (25:13):
Gerry and Midnight The hold Ikey Breakfast, Jerry and the Night,
The hold Ikey Breakfast.

Speaker 2 (25:20):
We're talking toast of settings here. This is something that's
near and dear to your heart. It's particularly in fact,
we've been talking about it a couple of days.

Speaker 3 (25:28):
It's great to finally get around.

Speaker 1 (25:29):
Oh man, well, I'm a you'd say it's great to
finally get around to it. Forty eight years. Yeah, forty
eight years. I mean actually not forty eight years, because
i haven't been making toast for forty eight years. I'm
going to say forty years. Forty years. I've been looking
for the perfect toaster, sitting different typer. I've burnt so
much toast over this. I've undercocked toast. I've gone back
for seconds, I've gone for second second drops. Yeah, and

(25:52):
then I've burnt a lot of toast on the second drop.
Oh yes, yes, I've never quite been able to.

Speaker 2 (25:58):
No, you will burn on the second drop, well, not
never double drop, because you often need to. But so okay,
So what is your perfect setting? Firstly, walk us through
the type of bread, the condition it's in when you're
when you're toasting it aserve.

Speaker 1 (26:10):
Well, I've got I've got two. I've got two settings,
one for white death slash molon Berg. You know, the
standard type of toast. I would never go for a
sand I've never toast sandwich bread.

Speaker 2 (26:27):
No, I mean I never even buy sandwich bread.

Speaker 1 (26:30):
Who buys sandwich bread?

Speaker 2 (26:31):
Sandwiches are better with toast bread?

Speaker 1 (26:33):
Who buys sandwich bread?

Speaker 7 (26:34):
Toast is better with sandwich no, no, no, I was just
gonna say, no, I don't actually buy sandwich breader white
toast bread. But you can see with the cost of
living crisis that some people may buy sandwich bread because
they get more slicelyppreate.

Speaker 3 (26:48):
Even in the case he lives.

Speaker 2 (26:49):
There's two things I want cheap on, and that's toilet
paper and bread, each.

Speaker 7 (26:53):
To their own minut You're on the white death breweder
here we are, and you use the toilet paper.

Speaker 1 (26:57):
You're on the white Death.

Speaker 7 (26:58):
And it's one of those things where I deny that
it's for me, but.

Speaker 1 (27:01):
It actually is for me. I didn't pick you for
a white death man. Okay. So there's the obviously the toast,
the white death slash mulon burgie vibe, you know, and
then there's the vogels completely different things, especially out of
the fridge, and you've got to keep the vocals on
the fridge otherwise it goes so quick.

Speaker 2 (27:24):
Because it's such a dense bread, isn't it. So how so,
what's your sitting on you? You've got quite a few
to four birth four.

Speaker 1 (27:30):
Birth have a four birth, Yeah, I've recently upgraded to
a sunbeam four birth, and there's that Sorry, that for
the morning rushed when the kids are getting up, is
getting up. Yeah, oftentimes I'm not there, so I wouldn't
know that. But at the weekends, yeah, doing toast for
scrambled eggs. Yeah, it's good to have four with the
family differently so, and it's got a new function called

(27:51):
a bit more, which which is actually what led me
to working out the perfect setting and what is it?
The perfect setting for me for vogels of the fridge
to get it perfect and I'm talking slightly brown but
not burnt, but with a little bit of brown going
over it over the top as five wow five five

(28:13):
five high power toaster. And I learned recently that you
know that setting number. Yeah, it's minutes. Yes, I've heard this,
it's minutes, but it's minutes ruder.

Speaker 7 (28:26):
But I've got a nine on my toast. Are you
saying that on my toaster it would go for nine?

Speaker 1 (28:31):
Do you go up to nine?

Speaker 7 (28:32):
Well, I mean that would be stupid. I wouldn't do that,
but it does your toastup.

Speaker 1 (28:37):
It's a super toaster.

Speaker 7 (28:38):
Yeah, it's a sunbeam four slicer as you've previously had.
And you know we normally said about five, but the
kids don't really like heavily toasted toast. And they said
about a one point five, which absolutely drives me natty.

Speaker 1 (28:52):
Okay, this is what the White Death thought. Yeah, yeah, okay,
because I did toast quickly. Yeah, exactly, So I'm a
two and a half on the White Death.

Speaker 2 (29:00):
For me, our toaster is so low power. I've got
it dimed out ten and then at that point it's toasted,
it's only just managed to toast the top of the vocals.
I'm then flipping that thing and reversing it, putting it
back in going again. But then I've got a and
then it's when I can smell and hear a couple

(29:21):
of the seeds crackling, and then I can smell that
it's toasted. I like to I like to connect myself
to my food. It's a very physical event when i'm cooking.

Speaker 1 (29:31):
But you're spending a lot, and that means you've got
to watch the toaster the whole time.

Speaker 2 (29:34):
No, because I can smell it from the okay, from
the lounge. Also, by the way, fun fact, just as
a as a byline, if you've ever got the hiccups,
a cure for hiccups, watch the toaster. It will scare
the Bejesus out of you, and it cures your waiting
for a wait, you're waiting for the toaster scares the
crap out of you.

Speaker 3 (29:52):
It will kill you.

Speaker 1 (29:53):
Okay, toast. You see, there's a person that's to fruit toast,
completely different thing. Fruit toaste takes some toasting, see, and
then two So that's on the second push. Yeah, so
they go five release You've got with my five on
the vogels, with the refrigerated vogels, which just makes it
absolutely perfect? Is that? Then the other day I think

(30:14):
I was mentioning this yesterday my daughter then came in
with a white death bagel. Yep, and she plunked it
down and didn't adjust the number. She didn't know, and
we had a burn situation. Is there anything worse than
the good luck getting rid of the smell of burnt
toast out of the kitchen?

Speaker 2 (30:28):
But when it happens to you, what's the first thing
you do?

Speaker 1 (30:32):
Furious? I'm furious someone sticks through?

Speaker 2 (30:36):
Would it hurt to make toasters see through?

Speaker 1 (30:38):
Great?

Speaker 7 (30:39):
I think they've got that.

Speaker 3 (30:40):
Do they have glass glasses? They do have glass toast?
I know they've got glass barbecues.

Speaker 1 (30:44):
Yes, I've been at a place recently that had a
glass barbecue. Yeah, like a glass barbecue. It was quite
quite dirty fore Moorish, very Moorish, and it was a
filthy glass barbie. They get dirty very quickly. You got
to watch them. The key to good toast is buttering

(31:06):
a hot Oh absolutely not on goes without saying, but
of that soft you'll rip straight through the sucker.

Speaker 4 (31:12):
Jerry and Midnight the hot Ikey Breakfast.

Speaker 2 (31:15):
Former return Zoe're now keeping a casual and studio beers
on the cusp of getting her degree. I've got one,
Ruda has two.

Speaker 7 (31:22):
And a diploma.

Speaker 2 (31:24):
Jerry has sorry, none, and we're worried that Jerry's getting
left behind. He didn't finish his degree at AUT in
the nineteen nineties. He was about six months shy, so
about half a year. What's that one semester, Yeah, semester
one semi away. And to that end, we have gotten
in touch massive update on getting Jerry's degree. On the phone,
we have from AUT Associate Professor and Communications Studies, Head

(31:48):
of Department Screen Audio and Journalism, Academic Advisor for Radio
and Audio. Matt Mulgar joins the show this morning. Good morning, Matt,
Thank you very much for your time.

Speaker 6 (31:58):
Oh, good morning, good morning.

Speaker 3 (31:59):
First question, do you have any memory of Jerry at.

Speaker 6 (32:02):
Au d No, that was like ninety five ninety six
spots and then I was actually working at radiohardorch in those days.
All right, great, authroat.

Speaker 2 (32:11):
It This good actually play quite well into our hands here.
What is how does someone get an honorary doctorate? That's
what that's what we want to get Jerry in the
first that's that's an honorary doctorate? Are those available from
aut and what are the criteria?

Speaker 6 (32:25):
Well, first of all, thank you for advising me, because
I've been working on this for quite a while, independently
of what you guys were doing after hearing Jerry winding
a minute. So for a couple of months, I've been
looking into this, and I was trying to find ways
and means and looking at his rpls and Gontry a
QO and that sort of stuff, and trying to figure
how to do it. An honorary doctorate's quite different. It's
something we award to somebody who's made a sustained and

(32:47):
lasting contribution to a field. So Peter Blake's got one
from us, Yes, Mike more he's got one. So at
that sort of level, that's where Jerry needs to get.
He has to be significant, long last contribution to something
that's important.

Speaker 1 (33:01):
How many years? How many years are you thinking as
significant and long lasting? Man?

Speaker 6 (33:07):
Fifty?

Speaker 1 (33:09):
Okay for good luck and broadcasting being forty to fifty.

Speaker 3 (33:12):
Yeah, Jerr's about again.

Speaker 1 (33:13):
I don't think there's anybody that's ever done forty to fifty.

Speaker 2 (33:17):
I see, yeah, I saw that in two thousand and
the first honorary doctorate from aut was dished out to
Sir Peter Blake.

Speaker 3 (33:22):
Is the issue that Jerry's never won the America's Cup.

Speaker 6 (33:25):
Well, it's one of the issues obviously. I mean, I'm
really keen to be part of the part of helping
It's become the most qualified morning Zoo breakfast show it will.
So I've been looking into it. Yeah, it's a lot
more difficult than it looks.

Speaker 2 (33:38):
Okay, So a doctor it's off the table at least
for the next what, Jerry twelve years?

Speaker 3 (33:43):
Yeah, if we're going forty or two.

Speaker 1 (33:45):
Yeah, I'm coming up. I'm coming up thirty maybe next year.

Speaker 2 (33:47):
Yeah, okay, so about ten years off that. So what
about an honorary degree?

Speaker 3 (33:52):
Is that a thing.

Speaker 6 (33:54):
Not really, I mean I could draw them certificate.

Speaker 3 (33:57):
Yeah, well this is sort of where we're going to
end up.

Speaker 2 (33:59):
A big is obviously the easiest, well not the easiest,
but the most logical way to do this is Jerry
just goes and actually finishes those papers.

Speaker 1 (34:07):
One of the logical one of the papers that.

Speaker 3 (34:09):
He was going to do was shorthand for journalism. Is
that still being taught at university?

Speaker 6 (34:14):
No?

Speaker 2 (34:14):
Okay, So could we potentially, as a roundabout way back
date that and just say, yep, he's got it because.

Speaker 1 (34:21):
My problem that was my undoing. You had to do
a shorthand course at eight in the morning. It was
like five days or maybe three days a week or
something I can't remember, and that was if you didn't
do your shorthand, then you weren't allowed to set up
particular exam or something. And I was working at BFM
at the time doing the radio breakfast, doing the news

(34:42):
in the morning, and so I couldn't go to shorthand.
And then they said, no way, you haven't got your
terms requirement. Yeah, and that was the end of that.

Speaker 2 (34:51):
But now the shorthand doesn't exist, surely you could just
could just take that one off retrospectively. Yeah.

Speaker 6 (34:56):
Well, one of the problems of the courses if you
start hitting out these things and everyone's going want one.
Can you imagine Jason Hoyt knocking down my door, you
know next week, doctor Hoyt. It's gonna be Yeah. So,
I mean I've got some speed Player of the day's
from my under thirty Gals rip team.

Speaker 1 (35:12):
Well, obviously you've you've got the honorary doctorates out of
the question, the degrees out of the question, diploma certificates
probably out of the question. I mean, could you give
me a mention in the in the au T newsletter.

Speaker 6 (35:24):
Well, well, we actually thought about another one, which was
having the most successful Dropout award.

Speaker 1 (35:28):
Oh, now that's something I'd be very happy with and
name that after Jeremy Wells.

Speaker 6 (35:32):
Yeah, the Jeremy Wells Most Successful Dropout Award.

Speaker 1 (35:35):
Well, I can't, I can't. I think i'd take that.

Speaker 2 (35:38):
Outre every year someone gets a doctorate from aut not
every year to someone get an award named after that.

Speaker 1 (35:44):
I'd be very happy with that, Matt. That would that
would make me really really stoked.

Speaker 6 (35:49):
Well, I'll talk to the a QO and get your
rpls up and stuff and have a good look at
the background of that and we can always talk about
that later. I mean it's not over. I mean there
may be a wedge somewhere I'm still looking into It
looks like a Dannie Lights Chace and Hill. Really.

Speaker 2 (36:02):
Oh no, Matt, this seems like the perfect outcome here.
If Jerry can get an award named after him, We'll
put u pin in a take it offline, run it
up the flagpole and circle back later and see if
we can get this award named after Jerry.

Speaker 3 (36:15):
How does that sound, Jerry?

Speaker 1 (36:16):
Oh, I'm very pleased with that. Matt Moulgard from AU two.
Thanks for your time this morning.

Speaker 4 (36:20):
Dear boy, Jerry and Mni the hold ikey breakfast.

Speaker 1 (36:25):
The edmund continues because earlier on we had it Dave
from Hamilton.

Speaker 2 (36:29):
That's right, Dave was on the line. He had gone
through four questions unsuccessfully. Just as the final three seconds
started tacking through.

Speaker 3 (36:39):
This happened. We've got the audio of Jerry asking the
final question.

Speaker 1 (36:42):
Which is larger the population of Huanga Nui or the
number of universe or the number of students at Auckland University.

Speaker 2 (36:49):
Oh you stumbled me up with it, stumbled in the
Christian there mate, is this a captain's challenge? Dave, Absolutely,
he's issuing a captain's challenge. So Dave called into question
your question reading ability. He's invoked the justice for Tony Claus.
I believe we had Tony on the line. We've just
dropped Tony. If you could call back in please, because

(37:09):
we need I mean, the man for whom the clause
is named, should be given the final say on this one.

Speaker 1 (37:15):
That's right, because all that time ago, just Tony I stumbled, Actually.

Speaker 2 (37:20):
It was a complicated you asked the wrong question your stuff.
There are a couple of them and I I can't see,
but I believe we've got Tony on the line here.

Speaker 7 (37:32):
Princess Leia and studio as attempting there is no actually
that's the wrong.

Speaker 3 (37:37):
To wrong Tony. We're not just taking any Tony. There
is a Tony.

Speaker 1 (37:40):
So before before we take that one call that we'll
decide in the bunker, we need to be clear. So
Dave had zero right, no questions right going into the
last question and the three.

Speaker 2 (37:55):
Second countdown had happened. There's a text through saying you
should have to get one right to have a captain's challenge.

Speaker 1 (38:02):
Well, I wonder about that. Well, we've got Tony on
the line now.

Speaker 6 (38:04):
Morning Tony, good morning, how are you good?

Speaker 1 (38:07):
Always good to hear from you, Tony. Did you hear
the Mastermind earlier?

Speaker 6 (38:12):
I did hear it?

Speaker 3 (38:13):
Okay?

Speaker 6 (38:14):
And can I just say it's an example of you
showing your lack of academic qualifications.

Speaker 1 (38:23):
Thanks all right, Thanks Tony for the drive. I really
appreciate that.

Speaker 2 (38:27):
So Tony as a victim of one of my factor
as one of his, in fact the original victim, Tony.

Speaker 1 (38:35):
You know, victim.

Speaker 2 (38:36):
You know what's going on here for Dave, you know
what it feels like, and you heard what's happened here.
On the one hand, Jerry's defenses, Dave had none right.
He was not about to get three questions right in
the last three seconds. So the captain's challenge is, you
know a moot point, Tony, how do you feel about it?
And your and your vote will be final. Should we
be awarding Dave one hundred and fifty dollars?

Speaker 6 (38:58):
Absolutely?

Speaker 5 (38:59):
Captain challenge, You guys cocked up so that the Tony
clause says pay the money.

Speaker 2 (39:05):
Okay, And unfortunately the Tony clause also says it comes
at a Jewish paycheck, comes out of my paycheck.

Speaker 1 (39:11):
All right, fair enough, Tony, fair cop, I stuffed it up.
That's the way that it works. Just should we go
back over those questions that we asked?

Speaker 3 (39:19):
Yeah?

Speaker 2 (39:19):
Thanks, thanks very much, Tony. A couple of texts through
saying can we actually get the answers please?

Speaker 1 (39:23):
Yeah. So, Massachusetts is the US state that Harvard University
is based in. There are are eight universities in New Zealand.
The two universities that go head to head in an
annual rowing race in England are Cambridge and Oxford. India
has four million students.

Speaker 3 (39:42):
The world's largest university one university.

Speaker 1 (39:44):
Yep and which is large of the population of Huangani
all the number of students at Auckland University. It's the
University of Auckland forty five thousand students.

Speaker 2 (39:53):
So congratulations today you've got none of those right, and
you've won yourself one hundred and fifty dollars, which means tomorrow,
on a Thursday, we will have fifty dollars.

Speaker 3 (40:00):
Think you can do.

Speaker 2 (40:01):
As well as Dave has a call tomorrow Jerry and.

Speaker 8 (40:06):
Midnight, the hold I Key Breakfast, Jerry and Midnight the
hold Ikey Breakfast.

Speaker 2 (40:13):
Time for a brand new segment that came about when
I found a receipt in my shopping trolley a couple
of weeks ago and we read it out. Jerry described
the person, but we never knew whose receipt it was,
so we'll never know if that was right or not.

Speaker 3 (40:24):
And it got us thinking.

Speaker 2 (40:26):
Because everyone loves to see I mean, everyone goes grocery shopping,
and everyone loves to judge other people's trolleys. And if
you ever get hold of someone's receipt, how much fun
is it to judge them? And so this morning we're
debuting a brand new segment, working title Mystery Shopper. Yeah,
you send in your receipt for your weekly shop. Jerry

(40:46):
reads through it and like a criminal Minds investigator, puts
together a profile of you, and we see how close
Jerry can get.

Speaker 1 (40:53):
Because I reckon, you can tell so much. You can
tell so much from someone's supermaker receipt. You are what
you eat well exactly. So I've got this receipt in
front of.

Speaker 2 (41:01):
Me here from a mystery shopper who's shopped at are Woolworth's.
Now forgive us. The resolution is not great and Jerry's
got new glasses. So this is going to take a
lot of get right up on that computer.

Speaker 1 (41:14):
A little bit blurry, but anyway, I'm just having a
look through here. So there's some button loose button mushrooms.
There's some dinner rolls. There's green Kiwi fruit, Griffin snacks
so and Arnet's crackers, so there's a whole lot of
crackers in there. There's there's some sour dough Himalayan pink salt,

(41:36):
which is quite interesting, so they've gone with the pink salt. Yeah,
there's an Alpine cheese and eating one kg at fourteen.
I brought that on.

Speaker 3 (41:45):
Special made up the street as well.

Speaker 1 (41:47):
There's what is spaghetti in the can. There's some pretzels,
extra cheese. There's the Harback fresh powder toilet cleaner, which
is exactly the same one that I use. I've got
to say so far, looking down this, this is feeling
a lot like me, to be honest. The Coldgate advanced
white purple toothpases. I just bought some the other day.

Speaker 2 (42:07):
The purple toothpaste. Yeah does that white, isn't it?

Speaker 1 (42:10):
It's meant to be good for wanting your teeth, But
what it does is ends up getting in your bowl
of where you're brushing your teeth, and it stains the basin,
the basin. You got to clean your basin, which is
really annoying. There's a there's a bit of there's the
pepperoni salami in there. There's the Mentos Mini rainbow bag
and the Mentos grapes. How I do love those.

Speaker 3 (42:29):
Yep. Something for after dinner, maybe the.

Speaker 1 (42:31):
Curry, the tax teaka masala. Bought some of that the
other day. You've got Callogg's Cocoa pops. Interesting. Interesting, it is.

Speaker 7 (42:39):
The Coco pops checks though, Jerry, not the traditional checks,
this little hash marking.

Speaker 1 (42:45):
Yeah, okay, you've got Turkish pizza bases. I buy those.
You've got your cream, You've got your chicken thighs, your
surloin steak thin cart, your bachelor's handbag, your Galaxy breeze,
baby leaf spinach, your broccoli dollars seventy each at the moment.
See that is very reasonable. That is it's a good man,
good for Brocoli.

Speaker 3 (43:03):
More vies into your diet.

Speaker 1 (43:04):
And then you've got some snack of chini chips and
some rations and some rations. Okay, I'm looking there another
sixty five title mind you, Yeah, one sixty five total.
It's not bare.

Speaker 3 (43:13):
Twenty nine items A lot of items.

Speaker 1 (43:15):
This person's shopped. Well, I got to say, this is
a smart shopper.

Speaker 2 (43:18):
I'd like from you. Just just build us a profile.
We're talking things like age, six, location, marital status, sense
of humor, blood type.

Speaker 1 (43:26):
Sure, I'm going to say, I'm going to say a
forty three year old because I think they've got kids.
I think a forty three year old male from a
city area, like at.

Speaker 3 (43:45):
A metropolitan one of the five main mets, yep.

Speaker 1 (43:49):
Marital status married, married with children. I believe how many
I'm going to say two ages, about about eight, about
tennish tennis, about tennish. Hard to say exactly, but i'm
going to say under under twelve.

Speaker 3 (44:07):
You've more or less described yourself from five years ago.

Speaker 1 (44:10):
This is me five years ago.

Speaker 7 (44:12):
Good point.

Speaker 2 (44:12):
Yeah, okay, Well, joining us on the line is the
mystery shopper.

Speaker 3 (44:17):
Call it X. Good morning. What's your name?

Speaker 1 (44:20):
First of all, my name is George. George, so I'm male.

Speaker 3 (44:26):
I presume you've heard Jerry's description of you. How accurate
was he?

Speaker 6 (44:31):
I'm a little bit hurt about the age to be honest.

Speaker 1 (44:33):
Oh, okay, George. How old are you four? Where you
shop like a forty three year old? George, I don't
think that's a bad thing.

Speaker 7 (44:45):
It's a it's a healthy mix of my long suffering partner.

Speaker 1 (44:49):
Okay. So married? Are you married?

Speaker 2 (44:53):
Unmarried?

Speaker 1 (44:55):
Yeah?

Speaker 6 (44:56):
Any kids?

Speaker 1 (44:56):
Yeah?

Speaker 6 (44:57):
I hope not.

Speaker 1 (44:59):
Twenty four? Yea, possibly a little early. So you are married? No, no,
I'm married.

Speaker 6 (45:06):
Did you say that relationship?

Speaker 2 (45:07):
And where about the olive in one of the main mets.

Speaker 6 (45:11):
Yeah, Auckland City, Central Aukland.

Speaker 1 (45:13):
Yeah, yeah, yeah, there we go. Okay, so I'm about
fifty percent close enough. Not bad things, Thanks Georgie. And
good shopping, by the way, itself good on you.

Speaker 3 (45:24):
Will lead you back to the forge there, George.

Speaker 1 (45:27):
It is the rations you see. I should have looked
when I saw bluebird rations. I thought they might be
for the kids. But no, he's twenty four.

Speaker 3 (45:33):
That is mature shopping for a twenty four year old.

Speaker 1 (45:36):
It's pretty good.

Speaker 3 (45:38):
That's pretty good shopping.

Speaker 1 (45:41):
Some of six.

Speaker 2 (45:42):
No booze has to be female or jeez, you were
way off as well. Also, you missed the glaring clue
in that Wilworth mount eaton right at the top of
the receipt Jerry.

Speaker 4 (45:56):
And Midnight the Hot Achy Breakfast.

Speaker 1 (46:02):
Yeah, dead our lives the game where we named five
people and you have to tell us whether they are
dead or alive. Two people going head to head. Person
number one this morning Dave from christ Church Morning Dave,
Good morning, gentlemen.

Speaker 6 (46:14):
How are we very well?

Speaker 3 (46:16):
Thank you?

Speaker 1 (46:16):
Dave.

Speaker 2 (46:16):
Just clarify you're not the same Dave that was embroiled
in the Mastermind Debarkle.

Speaker 6 (46:22):
No, not quite different day.

Speaker 7 (46:23):
Thanks would you say to barka minight? Sit to justice
for Jerry?

Speaker 1 (46:30):
Thanks ruder, Dave, you are an appliance rentals? I am
indeed what's the most popular appliance to rent? Dave?

Speaker 6 (46:37):
Probably from watch Machine?

Speaker 2 (46:39):
To be honest, actually, can Jerry were into TV?

Speaker 1 (46:41):
Off you?

Speaker 3 (46:42):
He's bugging as.

Speaker 1 (46:42):
What is shit? The bed? Dave?

Speaker 6 (46:49):
Is nothing worse?

Speaker 3 (46:52):
Should you?

Speaker 1 (46:53):
Okay? Dave? Can you test your buzzer please? It's your
name Dave nice and you're going up against James, who's
a plaster from duned In Morning James, Good morning James.

Speaker 2 (47:05):
How long's the standard sheet of jib?

Speaker 6 (47:09):
They come and all ranges of sizes from two forward
to six meters?

Speaker 3 (47:13):
Do you reckon?

Speaker 6 (47:13):
You?

Speaker 3 (47:13):
Could jump over a two point four met a bit
of jib.

Speaker 6 (47:16):
I've done it before, but you the jib broke, James.

Speaker 1 (47:21):
My grandfather was a plaster. What do you like on
a corners?

Speaker 4 (47:24):
Oh?

Speaker 3 (47:25):
The best? That's any good at throwing cove?

Speaker 6 (47:29):
Yeah?

Speaker 4 (47:29):
Throw that?

Speaker 1 (47:30):
You throw a bit of cove?

Speaker 3 (47:31):
Yeah?

Speaker 6 (47:31):
Okay, slap up.

Speaker 2 (47:33):
Do you want to test your buzzer James, James.

Speaker 1 (47:36):
A good one. Okay. You know how this works. You've
got a buzz in and then when I say your name,
you've got to say whether the person is dead or alive.
If the person doesn't get it right, then you still
have to buzz in and say whether they did or alive.
That's the rule broad out. Here we go person one.
He played central perk Barista Gunther on the TV SHO

(48:00):
Your Friends James. Michael Taylor is James, He's alive. Dave
did right, he is dead. To see people listening will
be like, well, surely if you know James has said
that he's alive, and Dave said he's clearly that people
have got it wrong before, you'd be surprised.

Speaker 6 (48:22):
The other day as well.

Speaker 2 (48:24):
Oh no, must have been an older episode, all right,
James and Dave, person number two, best known for his
role as Egon Spindler and Ghostbusters.

Speaker 1 (48:33):
Harold Ramis dead or Alive? Dave? Dave. Harold ramasays, I
think he's dead.

Speaker 3 (48:40):
He is.

Speaker 1 (48:41):
He died in twenty fourteen, age sixty nine, Dave away
to up, blustering.

Speaker 2 (48:46):
Start, James, you are do a die at this point
right now?

Speaker 1 (48:52):
Okay, James is reeling. This one's in your wheelhouse, James.
The thirty fifth Prime Minister of New Zealand. Jim Boulger
Dave Dave. I think it was a dead heat, but
I'm going to say.

Speaker 6 (49:04):
Dave, I think he's still alive.

Speaker 1 (49:07):
He is still alive. He's nine years old and he's
taken out old James things.

Speaker 6 (49:13):
Sorry, James, that's right.

Speaker 1 (49:15):
Mate, James. You're up. You're up against a fantastic player
of dead or alive. There. I don't think, don't think
it's anything. Don't think it's your fault.

Speaker 3 (49:22):
Cast. Yeah, Dave's taken out better men than you, James.
No shame in it, mate.

Speaker 2 (49:28):
Congratulations Dave. Great great Dave to be a Dave, isn't it?

Speaker 6 (49:31):
That is a great day to be Dave. Justice for
Dave's all.

Speaker 1 (49:34):
Rounds the Hidarchy Breakfast.

Speaker 8 (49:38):
Jerry and Lena The Hodarchy Breakfast. Jerry and Mini the
Holdarchy Breakfast.

Speaker 1 (49:45):
How we going giving away these four towels that I
actually gave to you and then you rejected.

Speaker 2 (49:50):
Oh, I'm very grateful for them, but I also know
that the reason you were so keen to give them
to me is because you want them out of your house.
So it seems to me like we've got to common
enemy here, and it's these towels being in any room
that we're also.

Speaker 1 (50:03):
Yeah, we're being overrun by towels at that place. There's
no space in the house because there's so many bloody towels.
Forty five I counted, and that's just the ones I counted.

Speaker 2 (50:12):
No, you're overstocked on towels and you're passing the savings
onto the list.

Speaker 1 (50:15):
And so I've never bought a towel in my life.
I've never bought a towel at half price at Briscoes.
I've never I've never paid for a towel.

Speaker 2 (50:22):
No, And we found out yesterday, Well, the reason is
because you've got a pill and so people bring their
own towels and then they forget about them because you
overserved them from your own personal drinks bar, and then
they forget them, and so that's why you've got so
many toils. But I thought, you know what, someone out
there wants these. You know, I'm not going to be
selfish and just get rid of them.

Speaker 1 (50:43):
So they are good towels. When I they are good towels.
They were once upon a time. They actually have been
passed down I think from my parents at one stage.
Those towels there late nineties. Yep, certainly the colors are
you know, a faded teal mint?

Speaker 2 (50:56):
Almost yes, at one point it was I think mint, yes,
And so I listed those in a traditional Facebook market
place listing, selling off four times. Jeremy Wells used towels
on the show Tomorrow late nineteen nineties. High Kat no
Rigio sending your best stuff is now accepting goods and
or services only as as whereas no low ballers.

Speaker 3 (51:16):
I know what I've got.

Speaker 1 (51:17):
These towers are good. I mean, people with kids, animals
will understand you you do need towels that you can
deal with some spells, that's right, occasionally like that. These
towers will make great vomit towels. They'd be fine for
cleaning yourself as well for drawing yourself after you've been
in the shower. But they do make great vomit towels yep.

Speaker 2 (51:34):
And they come in various different consistencies. There's crispy ones,
there's soft ones, big ones, small and someone as because you.

Speaker 7 (51:40):
Heat would Some of them also be quite good for
guests because obviously if you have a guest over that
needs a towel, they don't necessarily need to match the
rest of your manchester.

Speaker 6 (51:49):
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (51:50):
I mean when you guys sit on on when you've
got a guest over on the on the guest bed,
leaving a towel out, where do you sit on that?

Speaker 3 (51:57):
We've been leaving a towel for them?

Speaker 1 (51:58):
Yeah?

Speaker 2 (51:58):
Well you know like I'm rolled up with a rod tower.
Oh y'all folded into a swan. Yeah, yeah, I'll a
swine up for the doing being a swan guy, just
banging on the old thing next to the on the
tower rail.

Speaker 3 (52:14):
Leave it for them.

Speaker 2 (52:15):
It should when you're traveling, you shouldn't have to take
a towel with you. I'll bring it town.

Speaker 1 (52:20):
Ah.

Speaker 2 (52:21):
So we've had a couple of offers. Hamish from Perth
has offered the flat air fry. One owner heavily thrashed
by it. At least six blokes never been cleaned.

Speaker 1 (52:30):
Pick up Perth. You come to men that that's not
a good offer.

Speaker 2 (52:35):
Carl has offered a used Jason Hoyt murkin from the
nineteen ninety five series zena Warrior Princess. The thing with
that that murkan is the amount of pubes that are
left in the studio. We could just about rebuild one
of those ourselves, absolutely, and so we're probably going to
turn that one down.

Speaker 7 (52:50):
There.

Speaker 3 (52:50):
I'll give you my last five bucks for his towels.

Speaker 2 (52:52):
Need some more floor ones, some six for Jerry's number
of towels must match the number of condiments he has.

Speaker 1 (52:59):
It's interesting. Yeah, I think now what I'm saying. I
was at thirty something conniments year, thirty five conniments, forty
five towels.

Speaker 2 (53:06):
Someone sticks he on three four three and said, I'll
make custom disk tags. I've got access to a laser cutter,
slash and graver and have been thinking about making your
four little wooden laser cut nameplates.

Speaker 3 (53:15):
For your disk.

Speaker 1 (53:16):
Okay, that's a pretty good offerers, No, okay.

Speaker 2 (53:19):
Now, Master, you did mention when we functuated the studio
that we needed a bit more wood in here that
there wasn't enough wood. Yeah, and that's probably the only
thing we haven't put in here.

Speaker 1 (53:28):
And sometimes it's good to look across and just when
you forget the name of your co host, you can
look down and just instantly remember, I mean we do
have the name.

Speaker 3 (53:36):
Or actually, Jerry.

Speaker 2 (53:38):
You will notice that there's a name tag at Aluminium
one sitting on my desk here. I share it with
Jason Hoyt. Yes, it's his hoity j chief backbone Officer.
And that's when he forgets his own name.

Speaker 1 (53:47):
Yeah, I got that faces him.

Speaker 7 (53:49):
I've got one here that says keyes steam expert. Have
you got anything over there for me?

Speaker 1 (53:55):
No, No, there's nothing.

Speaker 2 (53:56):
Actually Okay, well, maybe should we get one for each
of the four of us and one from an oak.

Speaker 1 (54:00):
Yeah, let's do that.

Speaker 2 (54:01):
Okay, we'll take you up on that. So I feel
the person that's sent that through Agent oh nine one,
reach out, get in touch.

Speaker 3 (54:07):
We'll tear that up.

Speaker 1 (54:08):
Podcast is coming out at eleven am this morning on
iHeartRadio or wherever you get your pods. Have a lovely
day to day. We'll be here from six am tomorrow
morning on the FM broadcast.

Speaker 4 (54:21):
The hod ache you breakfast thanks to Funnings Tree. Load
up on landscaping with Funnings Tree