August 20, 2024 • 28 mins
On this edition of the Daily Bespoke Podcast, we pull back the curtain, and let you know the science behind radio advertising...
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Speaker 1 (00:21):
They're getting weird and wad of those.
Speaker 2 (00:37):
I don't know what that is.
Speaker 1 (00:39):
Good.
Speaker 3 (00:40):
Yeah, I thought it was good.
Speaker 2 (00:41):
I started well and then I didn't know how anywhere
to go.
Speaker 3 (00:43):
It was good.
Speaker 4 (00:44):
I had my eyes closed, did you Yeah, And I
was just mentioning you and I liked it.
Speaker 3 (00:49):
I thinks, man, because you know, hand down your pants
or what?
Speaker 1 (00:51):
Yep?
Speaker 3 (00:52):
Nice? Still there? Oh wait, do you know? I listened
to the podcast for the first time in a long
time last night, Fellows.
Speaker 2 (00:58):
That's one of the radio highlights podcasts.
Speaker 5 (01:00):
Both Yeah, I hadn't ventured that far into it and
quite some time and infect since I started working here.
I'd recommend listening to it. But what I noticed. What
I noticed was something that I think maybe we should
think about moving forward.
Speaker 3 (01:18):
What have I done?
Speaker 5 (01:18):
And it's it's not you, It's not just you, Jerry
sounds like it is mainly yeah, okay, what have I done?
After the radio show? And this is a real hot
the sausages made kind of conversation. After the radio show,
there's a moment where we have to record some ad
libs usually that will go in that have been paid
(01:40):
for by clients that we put into the show.
Speaker 3 (01:41):
The following day.
Speaker 5 (01:43):
I just ask moving forward that we think about the
fact that they will be heard by the nation and
that they do get played out on here. Because last night,
when listening to the radio show Highlights in Full, I
heard one of these libs that we did. I can't
remember what it was, but it did concern me. The
(02:03):
lack of energy, oh, the lack of I don't know love,
the lack of jizz, the lack of gusto, shall I
say towards I don't know, the clients that are paying
us good money to keep it, to keep the rooms
over our head. So I just want us to think
about that moving forward, and just know that, you know,
we've got to give these things a bit of energy
here and the okay ah as that really isn't my fault. Well,
I just thought it was mainly you, Matt. You always
(02:25):
gave it something.
Speaker 3 (02:25):
Yeah.
Speaker 5 (02:26):
The only thing that do confuse me about you, Matt
is you'd always start the ads not knowing about You'd
start the aed libs not knowing anything, and then by
the end of it you were telling me information about
the HEIRLB and that was confusing for me.
Speaker 4 (02:35):
Well as we know, and every single radio ad there's
a moron who doesn't know anything, good person who knows everything. Yeah,
who's telling the more on about the thing? I mean,
that's just all that's that's the basis of radio.
Speaker 5 (02:47):
But then how can the moron in about twenty five
seconds become so well educated that they know everything about
that thing by the end of the ad.
Speaker 4 (02:53):
Well, the moron represents the listeners, and so by the
end of the ad you should know as a listener, what's.
Speaker 3 (02:59):
Opped just all our listeners morons?
Speaker 4 (03:01):
Well, no, that's but that's it's sorry, not more the enlightened,
and then and then the disenlightened and enlightened, and so
you go from unenlightened to enlightened by the end of
the air. You don't go from a from a moron
to a genius. But do you know what I mean,
it's a metaphor for radio. It's a metaphor for you.
Speaker 2 (03:23):
Don't think it makes it seem like the person has
had a massive mental breakdown at the start of the
air when suddenly comes online.
Speaker 3 (03:31):
Before the air, you mean, before the has been well.
Speaker 2 (03:35):
Like if I said it, like I said to you,
what are shoes? And shoes are things you put on
your feet? Okay, you can get all the shoes you
want the shoe wounder.
Speaker 3 (03:47):
It seems good idea for a script we should use that.
Speaker 2 (03:50):
It seems like the person that asks what a shoes
at the start has had some kind of major.
Speaker 4 (03:55):
Mental Okay, so they didn't know somehow they knew, then
they didn't know, then they knew again.
Speaker 5 (04:03):
So you guys have written ads probably in the past, right, Jerry,
I think of your meridian and things like that. Is
that like a format and a template that you think
about a lot as a writer? Do you think about
that more on template of starting with the more on
and then you know, you edu get them throughout the ad,
and then by the end of it you've got the
more on telling the audience exactly what there is to
go about.
Speaker 3 (04:20):
Or is it just so natural this theory of tones?
Speaker 4 (04:26):
Never written an AD, really never, But so I don't
really know the process.
Speaker 3 (04:31):
But I have read a lot of ads. You have
read a lot of ads. I've read a lot over
the years, but.
Speaker 4 (04:35):
I've never written one, So I don't know.
Speaker 5 (04:37):
Would you say that that's the most common kind of
template for an ad, the more on and the expert
and then by the end of the ad.
Speaker 3 (04:43):
They're both experts, yep. And sometimes then the expert turns
into a more on in the last line.
Speaker 4 (04:49):
That's a really successful that's a high level operation when
that happens. I've seen that done a number of times
while I've been a part of it. I've been the
more on, Like I've been the more on, and I've
been the enlightened person two, and then I've been the
more on that works out what's going on. And then
I've also been the person who knows a whole lot
who then becomes more on by the end.
Speaker 3 (05:07):
So you've played I've done it all started as the
more on became the more.
Speaker 4 (05:12):
Yeah something like that. Yeah, yeah, totally so so okay.
So the takeaway from that is give it more.
Speaker 5 (05:18):
Just give it more, and then just be a little
bit course to the fact that not every edilab we
do has to follow the expert more on. You both
become expert. Tiplet I've I've just written one.
Speaker 2 (05:28):
See what you guys think about that?
Speaker 3 (05:30):
Okay, Okay, we go.
Speaker 2 (05:31):
If you're looking for the ultimate Father's Day present, I
have an idea for you. Mattea's number one best selling book,
A Lifeless Punishing, signed by the author. Just go to
Timeout dot coda and zed click on the book and
then the notes section of your cart at checkout, put
your dad's name and Matt he will sign it for
your dad. That's Timeout dot co dot in z or
(05:52):
here in store to time out Bookstore, Mount Eden.
Speaker 4 (05:55):
So you're just playing the more on there the whole time. Hey,
you're a moron. I'm just trying to work out how
that works with the moron and like, okay, more.
Speaker 2 (06:04):
If I went, ah, I've got no idea what to
get my dad for fathers Yes.
Speaker 3 (06:12):
I've got the answer for you. You should think about
man Heath's book. It's available in all good bookstores.
Speaker 4 (06:18):
Or you can click online and go to something that
I can't remember exactly right now, but that's a good
way to get it.
Speaker 2 (06:24):
And the way you do it, like you start, how
you do it. I'd go, no, no, there, no, get
my dad for Father's Day.
Speaker 4 (06:34):
And then you'd go I would say, I'm distancing myself
from this.
Speaker 2 (06:38):
I'll start again. Oh man, oh, Father's Day is coming
up and I've got no idea what to get my dad.
And then you would go, well, have you thought about
getting a lifeless punishing by Matt Heath, you can get
it signed by you can get it signed by the author.
And then i'd go, yeah, at Timeout, got cod and sid,
Yeah it's on the block. And then the note section
(06:59):
of your cart at check out, put your dad's name
and Matt Heath will sign it.
Speaker 3 (07:03):
Turn on a dime and it's like that spot on.
Speaker 2 (07:05):
And then you and then what a sane person would say,
you'd go, but you didn't know. How do you know
all the details about the website and the cart and
how you get the box signed? And then the start
you didn't. At the start, you didn't know about anything.
Speaker 6 (07:19):
Then the third party comes in and says, well, I
was just going to say maybe you start the ad
not as a moron, but maybe just someone that's disorganized.
And they're like, oh my god, I can't believe father's
days next weekend and I haven't even done anything. And
then Matt comes in and goes, well, interesting, you say
that because.
Speaker 2 (07:35):
X y x Y, And then you go, yes, time out,
dot co, dot in zed, just put your dad's name,
and the notes at the cart that's Timeout, dot co,
dot in zed or hid in store. And then you go, mate,
you didn't know anything. Now you know where the store is,
you know the website, you know how the whole thing
bloody works.
Speaker 3 (07:54):
Okay, it does ruin all ads for you on this.
Speaker 5 (07:56):
Once you hear the radios are now these.
Speaker 2 (08:01):
Days it's and when you're doing it, you see it.
But do people see it at home? Do they care
about the characters? Because it's not like, oh, fellow, is
it You're not like, well, the motivations, I mean the
people at homegoing the motivations of that guy that started
at the ad, I don't know, they don't. The the
arc he goes through was too quick.
Speaker 4 (08:21):
I think we go back to the basic just one
person just reading the thing. You know, I think we
need to go away from the play. It's the two hander. Yeah,
rather than that we've got here is that we've got
everything has to be run through the Matt and Jerry.
Speaker 3 (08:34):
Ark and the two hander.
Speaker 4 (08:36):
Why don't we just do one handers like you just
did then, Like your one hander was better?
Speaker 5 (08:41):
Like what happened to the day is just tell people
what it is, started and added with a rhetorical question.
Speaker 3 (08:46):
It was just one person and then you just kicked
on for another thirty seconds. Yeah, you know, are you
looking for a resolution for your lawn. How about you
try this?
Speaker 2 (08:54):
You're talking to the audience like you, so you're going
a lot of New Zealanders and this time year have
problems with their lawns. Yes, a solution that may help
you is this fertilizer that you can buy at Bunnings.
Speaker 4 (09:09):
It's just you listening to a person talking about it,
rather than you being the third party at a conversation
by a couple of morons.
Speaker 3 (09:15):
Yeah.
Speaker 6 (09:15):
But the problem is that you, guys, due to the
Madden Jerry show success over the last decade, is that
the people that are investing the money into these ads
are like, we want Madden Jerry and the ad and
then they've got to find a way for that to work.
Speaker 2 (09:29):
But couldn't they just run like is it because there's
an even amount in the script? Like do they need
to just have an uneven amount? So the person that
doesn't know it, But the person that doesn't know something
at the start can't be the person that knows everything
at the end. That person often me, I'm the guy
that doesn't know anything in the ads. I could just
hold that line.
Speaker 4 (09:45):
You do a good moron, I got to say, you
do you play a good moron.
Speaker 2 (09:50):
I could just hold that line right through the ad
and they not know the information at the end, But
it just involves an uneven amount of lines because it
always what happens is you were right out and then
it gets aside. They just go Matt, Jerry, Matt, Jerry,
Matt Jerry, and then the moron at the end suddenly
knows everything. So if it was just like, hey, Jerry,
I don't know anything about grass or bloody anything. I'm
(10:13):
an idiot, and then you go, well, I might be
able to help you with that. What's happening with your lawn?
And go well it's dead? You go wow at Bunning's,
And then that one makes more sense because you're the
person that always knew everything when I was always the person.
And then you know, I could go, oh, thanks for that,
because now I've got some information.
Speaker 3 (10:34):
That'll be great. We're going to just follow that formula
every time I'm gonna take a quick break. Yeah, there
a whole lot of those. Did you hear a whole
lot of those ads?
Speaker 2 (10:47):
Jesus, I hope there were was. I hope there was
a good Matt and Jerry back and forth, or the
Matt and Mesh back and forth we did.
Speaker 5 (10:57):
There was one, there was one bag edge Jerry shame
I got to do one of these the other day.
Speaker 2 (11:01):
Did you play the moron or the person that you
was going to?
Speaker 3 (11:04):
I think I played the part you play.
Speaker 6 (11:07):
So what happened was, Gerry you were away. Ad came through,
we want Jerry and Matt to read this, and I
was like, oh, well, Jerry's actually away. Do you mind
if Mash and Matt do it? Oh no, that's absolutely fine,
and then the script was changed to Matt enlightened Mash
moron makes sense. Then then the client then the client
(11:28):
heard the ad decided oh no, actually we want we
want Matt and Jerry after all, and then they changed
Matt to the moron and Jerry to the smart guy.
Speaker 3 (11:35):
Again that makes sense too.
Speaker 2 (11:37):
This is so, this is this is this the more
on chieraking. So if there's Matt and Jerry on the moron,
but if it's Matt Mash, the mass becomes the more on.
And then if Jerry comes back, they flip it around
and then I become the moron again.
Speaker 5 (11:52):
Just clar if Jerry and I in it together, what's
the more?
Speaker 1 (11:56):
The more?
Speaker 5 (11:57):
I'm still the more always.
Speaker 1 (11:59):
The more on.
Speaker 2 (12:00):
You're always You're always the moron, but I'm only the
more on with jury is involved. Yeah, okay, okay, it's
the hierarchy of moron, the moronical hierarchy. They run. And
you know what, even though I feel like it makes sense.
Speaker 3 (12:18):
Do you know, weirdly, it kind of does make I'll
allow that.
Speaker 4 (12:21):
Yeah, you want to you don't want to break through
the moronic ceiling at some stage, and break.
Speaker 2 (12:27):
Through the ceiling as long as I don't have to
read the ads first, and I just do one read,
which you might notice when I'm reading them, like if
it turns out to be a question by the time
you get at the end of the sentence, suddenly take
a mess of you tune up.
Speaker 3 (12:46):
It's like an in commanding Yeah.
Speaker 2 (12:48):
Yeah, yeah, but I mean the other thing that we
need to address is that they're called ed libs when
you do them on ear. Like if if we read
it for an AD, it's just an AD. But if
we read it on ear and which case, Rudy just
writes a play for us that we read for the
first time as.
Speaker 3 (13:05):
Something that we go into a play life.
Speaker 2 (13:07):
We've got on a play that's still called edlob even
though we read it, Why's that it's not an Why
is that this is an ad? What I'm doing now
is an dler? But if I read a script from
a piece of paper.
Speaker 4 (13:20):
That this whole conversation is going to bring down the
entire advertising industry. This is where our livelehoods are dependent
on this. Are we sure we want to we want
to ruin it?
Speaker 5 (13:30):
I don't know. I want to call hierarchy. I don't
know if I've got much left. So let's be very careful.
But reader, what so you.
Speaker 6 (13:37):
Well, then the instruction is that the eddler you're supposed
to add lib around it, because you know.
Speaker 2 (13:42):
We're supposed to.
Speaker 4 (13:43):
We've been doing it for ten years. And yeah, with
this out, this is that's why you're playing them more
on because.
Speaker 2 (13:50):
So everyone hears these things and I go, this is
a play that.
Speaker 4 (13:52):
Soone's you meant to read it and then you meant
to put it in your own words a fluff.
Speaker 2 (13:56):
I don't have time for that.
Speaker 3 (13:58):
Well exactly, I don't have time for that.
Speaker 2 (14:00):
And it's fine, but what if I say something horrific
about the company, Well that's yeah, you're going and the
more on, let you go Jerry goes, this new grass
fiddle is amazing. Really, I tried it. It was ship and
then sudden will go No, that's why we don't let
them add stick to the plane, stick to the Oh.
(14:23):
I think it's there's safe rails, you know, because really
you can insult anyone except for the client.
Speaker 5 (14:30):
Yeah, I'm trying to think of what other kind of
ads there are out there, because it's different. The more
on and the educated is definitely the biggest one.
Speaker 3 (14:37):
But there's what what other ads are out there?
Speaker 4 (14:39):
Well, sometimes there's the there's the I mean, a big
part of the radio advertising industry. While we're here as
the owner operator, he's then thrust in front of a microphone.
Speaker 2 (14:50):
Or generally speaking, thrust themselves.
Speaker 4 (14:51):
Yes, well sometimes I think that, and I think sometimes
the sales rep goes, this is a good way. I
think this person wants to well, I just.
Speaker 2 (15:01):
Did that before with an owner operator ad that I
made up for that time out book store thing.
Speaker 3 (15:05):
Yeah, and you want to be on here all the time.
Speaker 2 (15:08):
But if I was not about like, if you're looking
for the Ultimate Fathers, they'll be like, if you're looking
for that, it's the craziest. And if you're looking for the
ultimate father thing present, I have an idea for you,
and you go, who said that you should be?
Speaker 3 (15:25):
I mean, that's what I can't imagine who you're thinking
of it already.
Speaker 5 (15:30):
I heard it like that now though in the sunset,
we've still got in twenty twenty four, every dude that
voices an air talking like he's from the Might ten
ads back in the early two thousands, like yeah, good guy,
there people.
Speaker 2 (15:40):
People, if you're like this, if you're looking for the
ultimate fart stay prison, I've got an idea for you.
Speaker 3 (15:46):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (15:46):
There's the other one, which is the Vota phone ads
from the early two thousands, which is, if you're looking
for the ultimate Father's Day prison, I've got an idea
for you. Oh that's not called it.
Speaker 3 (15:56):
It's like, no, it's nearly though.
Speaker 2 (15:58):
I know you're hey, if you're looking for the ultimate
Father's Day prison, I've got an idea for you.
Speaker 4 (16:03):
Well that was that was revolutionary. I started doing voiceovers
in the mid nineties, and at that time, all of
the voiceover artists as they.
Speaker 3 (16:12):
Were called, were all people who spoke like this, and
they had very serious voices.
Speaker 2 (16:18):
If you're looking for the ultimate Father's Day prison, I
have an idea for you.
Speaker 3 (16:22):
They did. That's how they spoke.
Speaker 4 (16:23):
Yeah, And then all of a sudden, I was there
for the transformation, not my voice, because I was I
would rather be one of these people, to be honest,
I think that's a lot easier. And I think my
voice when I do that, is clearer and better.
Speaker 2 (16:34):
Ad Jason Hoyt, who his entire broadcasting career, puts on
a voice that is in his.
Speaker 3 (16:38):
Own precisely, and it sounds great.
Speaker 4 (16:40):
I watched the transformation occur, and it happened, and I'm
gonna say nineteen ninety eight, and all of a sudden,
people advertisers started to look for people who spoke normally.
Speaker 2 (16:52):
Yeah, right, and then and everything, and they say, I'm
not so what do they say? Not so retailed, not
so not so yeah, and not so reading, not so
hard sal yeah, yeah, So you sit in the pocket.
Here's a tip for young voiceover artists.
Speaker 3 (17:05):
What you do. I love a voice of a job.
If anyone's listening, by the way, it's you.
Speaker 2 (17:08):
This is what I do. Because they want it to
be so on TV, it has to be very different
from radio, so it has to sit so back in
the pocket. So before I do it old yawn and
I'll lean against the wall in the vocal growth booth.
So it's just so low key.
Speaker 3 (17:20):
This is for TV.
Speaker 2 (17:21):
Yeah, yeah, Okay. If you're looking for the ultimate Father's
Day present, I've got an idea for you. It's got
to sit that far back and if you want and
if it's like a junk food, you have to put
a smile on your face.
Speaker 3 (17:34):
So you go.
Speaker 2 (17:35):
If you're looking for the ultimate Father's Day present, I've
got an idea for you.
Speaker 3 (17:39):
It sounds a lot like a subway head that I
heard about.
Speaker 2 (17:42):
This isn't the last couple of years subway eat fresh.
Speaker 4 (17:45):
God, that sounds a lot like a subway head.
Speaker 6 (17:47):
What about the Australian one that you do has that
different nutri grain nutri grain.
Speaker 4 (17:52):
Well, you start speaking with an Australia, How Australian do
you get? Do you go this Australian or.
Speaker 3 (17:57):
When I do?
Speaker 2 (17:57):
The ads in Australia don't put on alien accent really
because they don't want that, because they don't actually want
to hive the Australian accent.
Speaker 4 (18:05):
Really, you just do like you'll go kids, your kids
are a pool. There would just be a couple how
much of the pool would you say? You can't say pool, Like,
if there's an ad for it, whirlpool, I won't do it.
Will Pool, I'll walk away. If will pool they're doing
any funk that, I'm out. I'm I'm not doing wheel pool.
Speaker 3 (18:26):
Kids pool kids kids pools, keep.
Speaker 2 (18:30):
Kids making wheel pools.
Speaker 3 (18:32):
Yeah, it's not going to work as an New Zealander,
is that?
Speaker 1 (18:36):
Yeah?
Speaker 2 (18:36):
But that's a real look behind the beef curtains.
Speaker 5 (18:38):
Wow, well there you go. Okay, okay, I'm looking forward
to my first voice job. If anyone needs me to
voice anything, just sing out.
Speaker 2 (18:48):
What about your first You're still waiting for another kind
of job as well?
Speaker 4 (18:53):
Am?
Speaker 3 (18:53):
All right, boys, do you actually do a voice of
a job.
Speaker 2 (18:56):
Yeah, of course you've got a voice?
Speaker 3 (18:57):
Thank you. No, you can not. I don't think so.
I don't think I got to the takes. No, I don't.
Speaker 4 (19:06):
Fuck really yeah no, I mean you might get there
one day.
Speaker 3 (19:11):
Get how do I get there one day?
Speaker 5 (19:13):
Well?
Speaker 4 (19:13):
Just open your eyes, listen and learn, mesh, open your eyes,
open your eyes listen and learn, mate, I.
Speaker 2 (19:20):
Mean one day you might get to be the moron
and an ad Try saying this, your award winning independent bookstore.
So how would you say that?
Speaker 3 (19:28):
Let me just read that.
Speaker 2 (19:28):
Really, your award winning independent bookstore.
Speaker 3 (19:31):
This is your award winning independent bookstore, mesh, this is
a trial.
Speaker 2 (19:36):
Time out bookstore, your award winning independent bookstore.
Speaker 3 (19:39):
Time out bookstore, your award winning independent bookstore.
Speaker 4 (19:43):
No, no, that's not no again its mates, So take
another to another take on that, just.
Speaker 2 (19:50):
Right away, just right away. Time out your award winning
independent bookstore.
Speaker 3 (19:55):
Going time out, your award winning independent bookstore. Now do
you have fun with time out? I haven't had fun
in the studio.
Speaker 4 (20:02):
You just kind of if you can, just sound like
you care a little bit more.
Speaker 3 (20:09):
Time out your award winning independent bookstore.
Speaker 2 (20:13):
I think you're having the tea on the time.
Speaker 3 (20:16):
You're back close to the mic.
Speaker 5 (20:17):
This is what a time out the award winning independent
books Shove something out. It's to retail time out, taking
your time out your award winning independent bookstore.
Speaker 2 (20:29):
This is how you do it. Time out your award
winning independent bookstore. Nine am to nine pm.
Speaker 4 (20:36):
You do it time out the award winning bookstore.
Speaker 2 (20:41):
Get a fucking fred Dagg over there.
Speaker 4 (20:43):
Jesus mate, I'm not going to for time out the
award winning bookstore.
Speaker 3 (20:48):
I'm turning that down that job.
Speaker 2 (20:50):
Are you not just one book store?
Speaker 3 (20:53):
There's enough money in that time out. It's not worth
my award winning time independent bookstore. No, that's no. At
the time book the Mom's coming on there, there's something
about it. It's just it's just how undrescriber and time
out your independent award winning bookstore.
Speaker 2 (21:09):
That have about this? Tonight on seven sharp, Hillary Barry
and Jeremy Wells on farming.
Speaker 4 (21:19):
That would be really good. You should get the TV
one voice as there is no TV one. There's no one.
Speaker 2 (21:27):
Tonight on seven sharp, Jeremy Wells and Hillary Barry with
some late breaking news.
Speaker 4 (21:33):
It's not nineteen eighty eight. You don't do that anymore tonight.
Speaker 3 (21:39):
You just you just sneak.
Speaker 4 (21:40):
People from one program to another and they don't even
know that it's happened.
Speaker 3 (21:43):
That's the whole way that they do it. Now.
Speaker 2 (21:45):
You don't want to credits, you know, you know what
you need to do. You need to hire a bunch
of people that break into people's houses and steal the
Let's move the remote to the other side of the room,
just away from the couch, so the news is on,
the chase is on. You just want to Actually, you
need to advertise people leaving like some kind of bogus thing.
We're having their remote control near either batteries make you
infertile or something. Leave your remote control in the kitchen
(22:08):
and then they put on the chase. Leave the remote
don't have the remote control with you on the couch,
because that just leads to people flucking over it.
Speaker 3 (22:14):
And easily enough.
Speaker 4 (22:15):
There's some sort of disease that's occurred with elderly people
in New Zealand. That's that's the case. Then don't seem
to be able to change, do you know us? Once
on New Year's Eve, I was quite wasted, actually, and
I was walking down along a reserve and parmone in Corimandel,
and I was heading up to New Year's Eve and
I looked in a window when I was because I
was walking along past a whole lot of batches, and
(22:36):
I looked in a window and there was a couple
and they were and I saw myself on television and
they were watching me on television, and you're watching that.
And I was watching them watching me from the window,
and I thought to myself, I need to knock on
the window here and go on. Was an episode of
seven chart and it was a New Year's Eve show.
Ah yeah, and I thought that'd be funny appearing and
(22:57):
then I and then I I didn't do it.
Speaker 3 (22:59):
It is this, it's been funny.
Speaker 2 (23:01):
Knock us if you Kevin knocked on the door and said, hey,
how's it going. Yeah, I've just noticed that you were
watching you on TV. I thought I was watching you
watching him, funny, watching you, watching you, watching me, watching you.
Speaker 3 (23:14):
Well, you're watching Jimmy exactly what I thought.
Speaker 2 (23:16):
What about if Hillary Barry had been with you and
you're watching you, watching them, and then you heard a
Russell and the bushes and then Hillary is hiding and
the bush.
Speaker 4 (23:24):
Watching you, watching me, watching watching me.
Speaker 5 (23:27):
Yeah, and depends what Russell though, because if you got
the Russell that I knew growing up, he would be
he was quite a big unit and there would be
scary Russell packer.
Speaker 4 (23:35):
I wouldn't want to put Hillary in a bush with
Russell Russell terrible.
Speaker 2 (23:40):
What about in a bush and Russell?
Speaker 4 (23:42):
I don't think she'd want to be in a bush.
She's not an a bush sort of a person.
Speaker 2 (23:47):
Well, my son went out the other day. I was
telling you guys, and he's seventeen and he went out
with his mates and he did a whole lot of damage.
Was closing us relaying when you're under twenty, you spend
a long time in bushes.
Speaker 3 (23:57):
Yeah, jumping into bushes.
Speaker 2 (23:58):
That's awesome. I love jumping and bus It's been so
much more time and undergrowth. It comes upon in your
life where you hardly ever find yourself an undergrowth. You're
twenty five now, mess have you been. When was the
last time you were in some undergrowth?
Speaker 4 (24:08):
Or it was the last time you jumped into a
flax bush, like a decent sized flax bush.
Speaker 2 (24:13):
When was the last time you just climbed a tree?
Speaker 5 (24:15):
I mean, these are all things that I haven't thought about.
This is a great typic of conversation. I remember like
looking at bushes like there were something to jump into.
Speaker 2 (24:22):
Yes, at one point in your life, you go you
just stop wanting to jump into every bush. You see.
Speaker 4 (24:29):
We used to ride our bikes and there was a
flax bush, like a really really big one, and we
would ride our bikes. Was kind of on the corner
of someone's property and on a burm, and we'd ride
our bikes down and then you'd leave your bike and
jump into the flax bush.
Speaker 3 (24:43):
God, it was fun.
Speaker 4 (24:43):
Oh man, I save one down the bottom of Chamblin Street.
We used to get drunk into it. And then one
day we were doing it and the guy came out
and goes, break your fucking and screamed out, and we
went hey, settled down, and then he goes, oh, I
do break your fuck and then his wife going get
off the balcony, John, Get off the balcony.
Speaker 3 (25:04):
John.
Speaker 4 (25:05):
Come in and he goes, I'm not coming out, and
they've got get in, John, and then we started saying, yeah, John,
get off John.
Speaker 3 (25:14):
Your dad's name John twelve because it wasn't my dad, okay.
Speaker 2 (25:18):
I had a sudden experience where I was jumping into
the spush with my mate Davy, and then we get
called into this house that was on the way up
the street that was next to our house, my house,
and they said and someone says, you broke wind and
make a mary?
Speaker 3 (25:36):
What?
Speaker 2 (25:37):
And then there was a girl, one of the daughters
in the house was crying. Me and Davy had been
jumping onto a flash book that she called win to
make a mary and they were like you but we
were called in. I was like, it took me a
long time as a I think I was about nine
to work out who when you get called into a house,
it smelled so much like garlic.
Speaker 4 (25:55):
Don't call don't name a flex bush.
Speaker 2 (25:58):
Yeah, so the only reason why you're upset the broken
wouldn't make him marrious because you've named the flexbush.
Speaker 3 (26:03):
Given it a personal you've given it human rights.
Speaker 2 (26:05):
So we've got a five year old girl over, we've
got a couple of happy parents. His house smell like garlic.
Yelling at me and davy feathers for breaking, wouldn't making merry? Like, well,
it was just a fucking flex books when I jumped
into it, I don't know it was one making merry.
And also flex bushes will react to the wind, but
they don't make it.
Speaker 4 (26:20):
They don't don't make the ones, but they're hard.
Speaker 3 (26:23):
You think flex.
Speaker 4 (26:26):
Good thing about jumping into a flex pushes it will
come back?
Speaker 3 (26:29):
Yeah, very hard to kill a flexbush.
Speaker 2 (26:32):
Yeah, it laughs at you. You you're jumping and you
think you sucking me up? Grass though, when making saying
I will be back, do't you I'll be back.
Speaker 5 (26:42):
The grass that you just used to grass whip up
your shins on y grass?
Speaker 3 (26:46):
What's it called?
Speaker 5 (26:47):
Their grass, cut their grass. Well, that's racist just because
it cuts you.
Speaker 2 (26:52):
I don't know what about thistles, Let's get rid of them.
Speaker 3 (26:58):
Jump into a gorse bush.
Speaker 2 (27:00):
There was no thistles and you could just wear bear
feet with gay abandon in the summer, but no thistles. Thanks, thanks, mate.
Speaker 3 (27:05):
Used to they used to call you the gorse bush,
didn't they. But there's just a little couple of pants,
a couple of little ples down there.
Speaker 2 (27:14):
Okay, all right, daisy pants, little daisy pants, little upside
down daisy pants, did they all right? Okay?
Speaker 4 (27:28):
I used to call you the egger panthers. They used
to call you the ring up where you shouldn't be.
Speaker 2 (27:33):
They called you the hydrange the way you smelled all right,
all right, Jesus, are you happy with it?
Speaker 5 (27:45):
Let's do it a Oh look what I just found
you Ready for this?
Speaker 3 (28:00):
It's time for Matt and Jerry's to your face off
Fridays back.
Speaker 2 (28:07):
Hello, I'm Matt Heath. You have been listening to the
Matt and Jerry Daily Bespoke podcast. Right now you can
listen to our Radio Highlights podcast, which you will absolutely
get barred up about anyway. Sit to download, like subscribe,
write review all those great things. It really helps myself
and Jerry and to a lesser extent, mess and ruder.
If you want to discuss anything raised in this pod,
(28:28):
check out the Conclave, a Matt and Jerry Facebook discussion group.
And while I'm plugging stuff, my book Are Lifeless Punishing
Thirteen Ways to Love the Life You've got is out
now get it wherever you get your books, or just
google the bastard. Anyway you seem busy, I'll let you go.
Bless Blessed, blessed. Give them a taste of key we
from me,
They're getting weird and wad of those.
Speaker 2 (00:37):
I don't know what that is.
Speaker 1 (00:39):
Good.
Speaker 3 (00:40):
Yeah, I thought it was good.
Speaker 2 (00:41):
I started well and then I didn't know how anywhere
to go.
Speaker 3 (00:43):
It was good.
Speaker 4 (00:44):
I had my eyes closed, did you Yeah, And I
was just mentioning you and I liked it.
Speaker 3 (00:49):
I thinks, man, because you know, hand down your pants
or what?
Speaker 1 (00:51):
Yep?
Speaker 3 (00:52):
Nice? Still there? Oh wait, do you know? I listened
to the podcast for the first time in a long
time last night, Fellows.
Speaker 2 (00:58):
That's one of the radio highlights podcasts.
Speaker 5 (01:00):
Both Yeah, I hadn't ventured that far into it and
quite some time and infect since I started working here.
I'd recommend listening to it. But what I noticed. What
I noticed was something that I think maybe we should
think about moving forward.
Speaker 3 (01:18):
What have I done?
Speaker 5 (01:18):
And it's it's not you, It's not just you, Jerry
sounds like it is mainly yeah, okay, what have I done?
After the radio show? And this is a real hot
the sausages made kind of conversation. After the radio show,
there's a moment where we have to record some ad
libs usually that will go in that have been paid
(01:40):
for by clients that we put into the show.
Speaker 3 (01:41):
The following day.
Speaker 5 (01:43):
I just ask moving forward that we think about the
fact that they will be heard by the nation and
that they do get played out on here. Because last night,
when listening to the radio show Highlights in Full, I
heard one of these libs that we did. I can't
remember what it was, but it did concern me. The
(02:03):
lack of energy, oh, the lack of I don't know love,
the lack of jizz, the lack of gusto, shall I
say towards I don't know, the clients that are paying
us good money to keep it, to keep the rooms
over our head. So I just want us to think
about that moving forward, and just know that, you know,
we've got to give these things a bit of energy
here and the okay ah as that really isn't my fault. Well,
I just thought it was mainly you, Matt. You always
(02:25):
gave it something.
Speaker 3 (02:25):
Yeah.
Speaker 5 (02:26):
The only thing that do confuse me about you, Matt
is you'd always start the ads not knowing about You'd
start the aed libs not knowing anything, and then by
the end of it you were telling me information about
the HEIRLB and that was confusing for me.
Speaker 4 (02:35):
Well as we know, and every single radio ad there's
a moron who doesn't know anything, good person who knows everything. Yeah,
who's telling the more on about the thing? I mean,
that's just all that's that's the basis of radio.
Speaker 5 (02:47):
But then how can the moron in about twenty five
seconds become so well educated that they know everything about
that thing by the end of the ad.
Speaker 4 (02:53):
Well, the moron represents the listeners, and so by the
end of the ad you should know as a listener, what's.
Speaker 3 (02:59):
Opped just all our listeners morons?
Speaker 4 (03:01):
Well, no, that's but that's it's sorry, not more the enlightened,
and then and then the disenlightened and enlightened, and so
you go from unenlightened to enlightened by the end of
the air. You don't go from a from a moron
to a genius. But do you know what I mean,
it's a metaphor for radio. It's a metaphor for you.
Speaker 2 (03:23):
Don't think it makes it seem like the person has
had a massive mental breakdown at the start of the
air when suddenly comes online.
Speaker 3 (03:31):
Before the air, you mean, before the has been well.
Speaker 2 (03:35):
Like if I said it, like I said to you,
what are shoes? And shoes are things you put on
your feet? Okay, you can get all the shoes you
want the shoe wounder.
Speaker 3 (03:47):
It seems good idea for a script we should use that.
Speaker 2 (03:50):
It seems like the person that asks what a shoes
at the start has had some kind of major.
Speaker 4 (03:55):
Mental Okay, so they didn't know somehow they knew, then
they didn't know, then they knew again.
Speaker 5 (04:03):
So you guys have written ads probably in the past, right, Jerry,
I think of your meridian and things like that. Is
that like a format and a template that you think
about a lot as a writer? Do you think about
that more on template of starting with the more on
and then you know, you edu get them throughout the ad,
and then by the end of it you've got the
more on telling the audience exactly what there is to
go about.
Speaker 3 (04:20):
Or is it just so natural this theory of tones?
Speaker 4 (04:26):
Never written an AD, really never, But so I don't
really know the process.
Speaker 3 (04:31):
But I have read a lot of ads. You have
read a lot of ads. I've read a lot over
the years, but.
Speaker 4 (04:35):
I've never written one, So I don't know.
Speaker 5 (04:37):
Would you say that that's the most common kind of
template for an ad, the more on and the expert
and then by the end of the ad.
Speaker 3 (04:43):
They're both experts, yep. And sometimes then the expert turns
into a more on in the last line.
Speaker 4 (04:49):
That's a really successful that's a high level operation when
that happens. I've seen that done a number of times
while I've been a part of it. I've been the
more on, Like I've been the more on, and I've
been the enlightened person two, and then I've been the
more on that works out what's going on. And then
I've also been the person who knows a whole lot
who then becomes more on by the end.
Speaker 3 (05:07):
So you've played I've done it all started as the
more on became the more.
Speaker 4 (05:12):
Yeah something like that. Yeah, yeah, totally so so okay.
So the takeaway from that is give it more.
Speaker 5 (05:18):
Just give it more, and then just be a little
bit course to the fact that not every edilab we
do has to follow the expert more on. You both
become expert. Tiplet I've I've just written one.
Speaker 2 (05:28):
See what you guys think about that?
Speaker 3 (05:30):
Okay, Okay, we go.
Speaker 2 (05:31):
If you're looking for the ultimate Father's Day present, I
have an idea for you. Mattea's number one best selling book,
A Lifeless Punishing, signed by the author. Just go to
Timeout dot coda and zed click on the book and
then the notes section of your cart at checkout, put
your dad's name and Matt he will sign it for
your dad. That's Timeout dot co dot in z or
(05:52):
here in store to time out Bookstore, Mount Eden.
Speaker 4 (05:55):
So you're just playing the more on there the whole time. Hey,
you're a moron. I'm just trying to work out how
that works with the moron and like, okay, more.
Speaker 2 (06:04):
If I went, ah, I've got no idea what to
get my dad for fathers Yes.
Speaker 3 (06:12):
I've got the answer for you. You should think about
man Heath's book. It's available in all good bookstores.
Speaker 4 (06:18):
Or you can click online and go to something that
I can't remember exactly right now, but that's a good
way to get it.
Speaker 2 (06:24):
And the way you do it, like you start, how
you do it. I'd go, no, no, there, no, get
my dad for Father's Day.
Speaker 4 (06:34):
And then you'd go I would say, I'm distancing myself
from this.
Speaker 2 (06:38):
I'll start again. Oh man, oh, Father's Day is coming
up and I've got no idea what to get my dad.
And then you would go, well, have you thought about
getting a lifeless punishing by Matt Heath, you can get
it signed by you can get it signed by the author.
And then i'd go, yeah, at Timeout, got cod and sid,
Yeah it's on the block. And then the note section
(06:59):
of your cart at check out, put your dad's name
and Matt Heath will sign it.
Speaker 3 (07:03):
Turn on a dime and it's like that spot on.
Speaker 2 (07:05):
And then you and then what a sane person would say,
you'd go, but you didn't know. How do you know
all the details about the website and the cart and
how you get the box signed? And then the start
you didn't. At the start, you didn't know about anything.
Speaker 6 (07:19):
Then the third party comes in and says, well, I
was just going to say maybe you start the ad
not as a moron, but maybe just someone that's disorganized.
And they're like, oh my god, I can't believe father's
days next weekend and I haven't even done anything. And
then Matt comes in and goes, well, interesting, you say
that because.
Speaker 2 (07:35):
X y x Y, And then you go, yes, time out,
dot co, dot in zed, just put your dad's name,
and the notes at the cart that's Timeout, dot co,
dot in zed or hid in store. And then you go, mate,
you didn't know anything. Now you know where the store is,
you know the website, you know how the whole thing
bloody works.
Speaker 3 (07:54):
Okay, it does ruin all ads for you on this.
Speaker 5 (07:56):
Once you hear the radios are now these.
Speaker 2 (08:01):
Days it's and when you're doing it, you see it.
But do people see it at home? Do they care
about the characters? Because it's not like, oh, fellow, is
it You're not like, well, the motivations, I mean the
people at homegoing the motivations of that guy that started
at the ad, I don't know, they don't. The the
arc he goes through was too quick.
Speaker 4 (08:21):
I think we go back to the basic just one
person just reading the thing. You know, I think we
need to go away from the play. It's the two hander. Yeah,
rather than that we've got here is that we've got
everything has to be run through the Matt and Jerry.
Speaker 3 (08:34):
Ark and the two hander.
Speaker 4 (08:36):
Why don't we just do one handers like you just
did then, Like your one hander was better?
Speaker 5 (08:41):
Like what happened to the day is just tell people
what it is, started and added with a rhetorical question.
Speaker 3 (08:46):
It was just one person and then you just kicked
on for another thirty seconds. Yeah, you know, are you
looking for a resolution for your lawn. How about you
try this?
Speaker 2 (08:54):
You're talking to the audience like you, so you're going
a lot of New Zealanders and this time year have
problems with their lawns. Yes, a solution that may help
you is this fertilizer that you can buy at Bunnings.
Speaker 4 (09:09):
It's just you listening to a person talking about it,
rather than you being the third party at a conversation
by a couple of morons.
Speaker 3 (09:15):
Yeah.
Speaker 6 (09:15):
But the problem is that you, guys, due to the
Madden Jerry show success over the last decade, is that
the people that are investing the money into these ads
are like, we want Madden Jerry and the ad and
then they've got to find a way for that to work.
Speaker 2 (09:29):
But couldn't they just run like is it because there's
an even amount in the script? Like do they need
to just have an uneven amount? So the person that
doesn't know it, But the person that doesn't know something
at the start can't be the person that knows everything
at the end. That person often me, I'm the guy
that doesn't know anything in the ads. I could just
hold that line.
Speaker 4 (09:45):
You do a good moron, I got to say, you
do you play a good moron.
Speaker 2 (09:50):
I could just hold that line right through the ad
and they not know the information at the end, But
it just involves an uneven amount of lines because it
always what happens is you were right out and then
it gets aside. They just go Matt, Jerry, Matt, Jerry,
Matt Jerry, and then the moron at the end suddenly
knows everything. So if it was just like, hey, Jerry,
I don't know anything about grass or bloody anything. I'm
(10:13):
an idiot, and then you go, well, I might be
able to help you with that. What's happening with your lawn?
And go well it's dead? You go wow at Bunning's,
And then that one makes more sense because you're the
person that always knew everything when I was always the person.
And then you know, I could go, oh, thanks for that,
because now I've got some information.
Speaker 3 (10:34):
That'll be great. We're going to just follow that formula
every time I'm gonna take a quick break. Yeah, there
a whole lot of those. Did you hear a whole
lot of those ads?
Speaker 2 (10:47):
Jesus, I hope there were was. I hope there was
a good Matt and Jerry back and forth, or the
Matt and Mesh back and forth we did.
Speaker 5 (10:57):
There was one, there was one bag edge Jerry shame
I got to do one of these the other day.
Speaker 2 (11:01):
Did you play the moron or the person that you
was going to?
Speaker 3 (11:04):
I think I played the part you play.
Speaker 6 (11:07):
So what happened was, Gerry you were away. Ad came through,
we want Jerry and Matt to read this, and I
was like, oh, well, Jerry's actually away. Do you mind
if Mash and Matt do it? Oh no, that's absolutely fine,
and then the script was changed to Matt enlightened Mash
moron makes sense. Then then the client then the client
(11:28):
heard the ad decided oh no, actually we want we
want Matt and Jerry after all, and then they changed
Matt to the moron and Jerry to the smart guy.
Speaker 3 (11:35):
Again that makes sense too.
Speaker 2 (11:37):
This is so, this is this is this the more
on chieraking. So if there's Matt and Jerry on the moron,
but if it's Matt Mash, the mass becomes the more on.
And then if Jerry comes back, they flip it around
and then I become the moron again.
Speaker 5 (11:52):
Just clar if Jerry and I in it together, what's
the more?
Speaker 1 (11:56):
The more?
Speaker 5 (11:57):
I'm still the more always.
Speaker 1 (11:59):
The more on.
Speaker 2 (12:00):
You're always You're always the moron, but I'm only the
more on with jury is involved. Yeah, okay, okay, it's
the hierarchy of moron, the moronical hierarchy. They run. And
you know what, even though I feel like it makes sense.
Speaker 3 (12:18):
Do you know, weirdly, it kind of does make I'll
allow that.
Speaker 4 (12:21):
Yeah, you want to you don't want to break through
the moronic ceiling at some stage, and break.
Speaker 2 (12:27):
Through the ceiling as long as I don't have to
read the ads first, and I just do one read,
which you might notice when I'm reading them, like if
it turns out to be a question by the time
you get at the end of the sentence, suddenly take
a mess of you tune up.
Speaker 3 (12:46):
It's like an in commanding Yeah.
Speaker 2 (12:48):
Yeah, yeah, but I mean the other thing that we
need to address is that they're called ed libs when
you do them on ear. Like if if we read
it for an AD, it's just an AD. But if
we read it on ear and which case, Rudy just
writes a play for us that we read for the
first time as.
Speaker 3 (13:05):
Something that we go into a play life.
Speaker 2 (13:07):
We've got on a play that's still called edlob even
though we read it, Why's that it's not an Why
is that this is an ad? What I'm doing now
is an dler? But if I read a script from
a piece of paper.
Speaker 4 (13:20):
That this whole conversation is going to bring down the
entire advertising industry. This is where our livelehoods are dependent
on this. Are we sure we want to we want
to ruin it?
Speaker 5 (13:30):
I don't know. I want to call hierarchy. I don't
know if I've got much left. So let's be very careful.
But reader, what so you.
Speaker 6 (13:37):
Well, then the instruction is that the eddler you're supposed
to add lib around it, because you know.
Speaker 2 (13:42):
We're supposed to.
Speaker 4 (13:43):
We've been doing it for ten years. And yeah, with
this out, this is that's why you're playing them more
on because.
Speaker 2 (13:50):
So everyone hears these things and I go, this is
a play that.
Speaker 4 (13:52):
Soone's you meant to read it and then you meant
to put it in your own words a fluff.
Speaker 2 (13:56):
I don't have time for that.
Speaker 3 (13:58):
Well exactly, I don't have time for that.
Speaker 2 (14:00):
And it's fine, but what if I say something horrific
about the company, Well that's yeah, you're going and the
more on, let you go Jerry goes, this new grass
fiddle is amazing. Really, I tried it. It was ship and
then sudden will go No, that's why we don't let
them add stick to the plane, stick to the Oh.
(14:23):
I think it's there's safe rails, you know, because really
you can insult anyone except for the client.
Speaker 5 (14:30):
Yeah, I'm trying to think of what other kind of
ads there are out there, because it's different. The more
on and the educated is definitely the biggest one.
Speaker 3 (14:37):
But there's what what other ads are out there?
Speaker 4 (14:39):
Well, sometimes there's the there's the I mean, a big
part of the radio advertising industry. While we're here as
the owner operator, he's then thrust in front of a microphone.
Speaker 2 (14:50):
Or generally speaking, thrust themselves.
Speaker 4 (14:51):
Yes, well sometimes I think that, and I think sometimes
the sales rep goes, this is a good way. I
think this person wants to well, I just.
Speaker 2 (15:01):
Did that before with an owner operator ad that I
made up for that time out book store thing.
Speaker 3 (15:05):
Yeah, and you want to be on here all the time.
Speaker 2 (15:08):
But if I was not about like, if you're looking
for the Ultimate Fathers, they'll be like, if you're looking
for that, it's the craziest. And if you're looking for the
ultimate father thing present, I have an idea for you,
and you go, who said that you should be?
Speaker 3 (15:25):
I mean, that's what I can't imagine who you're thinking
of it already.
Speaker 5 (15:30):
I heard it like that now though in the sunset,
we've still got in twenty twenty four, every dude that
voices an air talking like he's from the Might ten
ads back in the early two thousands, like yeah, good guy,
there people.
Speaker 2 (15:40):
People, if you're like this, if you're looking for the
ultimate fart stay prison, I've got an idea for you.
Speaker 3 (15:46):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (15:46):
There's the other one, which is the Vota phone ads
from the early two thousands, which is, if you're looking
for the ultimate Father's Day prison, I've got an idea
for you. Oh that's not called it.
Speaker 3 (15:56):
It's like, no, it's nearly though.
Speaker 2 (15:58):
I know you're hey, if you're looking for the ultimate
Father's Day prison, I've got an idea for you.
Speaker 4 (16:03):
Well that was that was revolutionary. I started doing voiceovers
in the mid nineties, and at that time, all of
the voiceover artists as they.
Speaker 3 (16:12):
Were called, were all people who spoke like this, and
they had very serious voices.
Speaker 2 (16:18):
If you're looking for the ultimate Father's Day prison, I
have an idea for you.
Speaker 3 (16:22):
They did. That's how they spoke.
Speaker 4 (16:23):
Yeah, And then all of a sudden, I was there
for the transformation, not my voice, because I was I
would rather be one of these people, to be honest,
I think that's a lot easier. And I think my
voice when I do that, is clearer and better.
Speaker 2 (16:34):
Ad Jason Hoyt, who his entire broadcasting career, puts on
a voice that is in his.
Speaker 3 (16:38):
Own precisely, and it sounds great.
Speaker 4 (16:40):
I watched the transformation occur, and it happened, and I'm
gonna say nineteen ninety eight, and all of a sudden,
people advertisers started to look for people who spoke normally.
Speaker 2 (16:52):
Yeah, right, and then and everything, and they say, I'm
not so what do they say? Not so retailed, not
so not so yeah, and not so reading, not so
hard sal yeah, yeah, So you sit in the pocket.
Here's a tip for young voiceover artists.
Speaker 3 (17:05):
What you do. I love a voice of a job.
If anyone's listening, by the way, it's you.
Speaker 2 (17:08):
This is what I do. Because they want it to
be so on TV, it has to be very different
from radio, so it has to sit so back in
the pocket. So before I do it old yawn and
I'll lean against the wall in the vocal growth booth.
So it's just so low key.
Speaker 3 (17:20):
This is for TV.
Speaker 2 (17:21):
Yeah, yeah, Okay. If you're looking for the ultimate Father's
Day present, I've got an idea for you. It's got
to sit that far back and if you want and
if it's like a junk food, you have to put
a smile on your face.
Speaker 3 (17:34):
So you go.
Speaker 2 (17:35):
If you're looking for the ultimate Father's Day present, I've
got an idea for you.
Speaker 3 (17:39):
It sounds a lot like a subway head that I
heard about.
Speaker 2 (17:42):
This isn't the last couple of years subway eat fresh.
Speaker 4 (17:45):
God, that sounds a lot like a subway head.
Speaker 6 (17:47):
What about the Australian one that you do has that
different nutri grain nutri grain.
Speaker 4 (17:52):
Well, you start speaking with an Australia, How Australian do
you get? Do you go this Australian or.
Speaker 3 (17:57):
When I do?
Speaker 2 (17:57):
The ads in Australia don't put on alien accent really
because they don't want that, because they don't actually want
to hive the Australian accent.
Speaker 4 (18:05):
Really, you just do like you'll go kids, your kids
are a pool. There would just be a couple how
much of the pool would you say? You can't say pool, Like,
if there's an ad for it, whirlpool, I won't do it.
Will Pool, I'll walk away. If will pool they're doing
any funk that, I'm out. I'm I'm not doing wheel pool.
Speaker 3 (18:26):
Kids pool kids kids pools, keep.
Speaker 2 (18:30):
Kids making wheel pools.
Speaker 3 (18:32):
Yeah, it's not going to work as an New Zealander,
is that?
Speaker 1 (18:36):
Yeah?
Speaker 2 (18:36):
But that's a real look behind the beef curtains.
Speaker 5 (18:38):
Wow, well there you go. Okay, okay, I'm looking forward
to my first voice job. If anyone needs me to
voice anything, just sing out.
Speaker 2 (18:48):
What about your first You're still waiting for another kind
of job as well?
Speaker 4 (18:53):
Am?
Speaker 3 (18:53):
All right, boys, do you actually do a voice of
a job.
Speaker 2 (18:56):
Yeah, of course you've got a voice?
Speaker 3 (18:57):
Thank you. No, you can not. I don't think so.
I don't think I got to the takes. No, I don't.
Speaker 4 (19:06):
Fuck really yeah no, I mean you might get there
one day.
Speaker 3 (19:11):
Get how do I get there one day?
Speaker 5 (19:13):
Well?
Speaker 4 (19:13):
Just open your eyes, listen and learn, mesh, open your eyes,
open your eyes listen and learn, mate, I.
Speaker 2 (19:20):
Mean one day you might get to be the moron
and an ad Try saying this, your award winning independent bookstore.
So how would you say that?
Speaker 3 (19:28):
Let me just read that.
Speaker 2 (19:28):
Really, your award winning independent bookstore.
Speaker 3 (19:31):
This is your award winning independent bookstore, mesh, this is
a trial.
Speaker 2 (19:36):
Time out bookstore, your award winning independent bookstore.
Speaker 3 (19:39):
Time out bookstore, your award winning independent bookstore.
Speaker 4 (19:43):
No, no, that's not no again its mates, So take
another to another take on that, just.
Speaker 2 (19:50):
Right away, just right away. Time out your award winning
independent bookstore.
Speaker 3 (19:55):
Going time out, your award winning independent bookstore. Now do
you have fun with time out? I haven't had fun
in the studio.
Speaker 4 (20:02):
You just kind of if you can, just sound like
you care a little bit more.
Speaker 3 (20:09):
Time out your award winning independent bookstore.
Speaker 2 (20:13):
I think you're having the tea on the time.
Speaker 3 (20:16):
You're back close to the mic.
Speaker 5 (20:17):
This is what a time out the award winning independent
books Shove something out. It's to retail time out, taking
your time out your award winning independent bookstore.
Speaker 2 (20:29):
This is how you do it. Time out your award
winning independent bookstore. Nine am to nine pm.
Speaker 4 (20:36):
You do it time out the award winning bookstore.
Speaker 2 (20:41):
Get a fucking fred Dagg over there.
Speaker 4 (20:43):
Jesus mate, I'm not going to for time out the
award winning bookstore.
Speaker 3 (20:48):
I'm turning that down that job.
Speaker 2 (20:50):
Are you not just one book store?
Speaker 3 (20:53):
There's enough money in that time out. It's not worth
my award winning time independent bookstore. No, that's no. At
the time book the Mom's coming on there, there's something
about it. It's just it's just how undrescriber and time
out your independent award winning bookstore.
Speaker 2 (21:09):
That have about this? Tonight on seven sharp, Hillary Barry
and Jeremy Wells on farming.
Speaker 4 (21:19):
That would be really good. You should get the TV
one voice as there is no TV one. There's no one.
Speaker 2 (21:27):
Tonight on seven sharp, Jeremy Wells and Hillary Barry with
some late breaking news.
Speaker 4 (21:33):
It's not nineteen eighty eight. You don't do that anymore tonight.
Speaker 3 (21:39):
You just you just sneak.
Speaker 4 (21:40):
People from one program to another and they don't even
know that it's happened.
Speaker 3 (21:43):
That's the whole way that they do it. Now.
Speaker 2 (21:45):
You don't want to credits, you know, you know what
you need to do. You need to hire a bunch
of people that break into people's houses and steal the
Let's move the remote to the other side of the room,
just away from the couch, so the news is on,
the chase is on. You just want to Actually, you
need to advertise people leaving like some kind of bogus thing.
We're having their remote control near either batteries make you
infertile or something. Leave your remote control in the kitchen
(22:08):
and then they put on the chase. Leave the remote
don't have the remote control with you on the couch,
because that just leads to people flucking over it.
Speaker 3 (22:14):
And easily enough.
Speaker 4 (22:15):
There's some sort of disease that's occurred with elderly people
in New Zealand. That's that's the case. Then don't seem
to be able to change, do you know us? Once
on New Year's Eve, I was quite wasted, actually, and
I was walking down along a reserve and parmone in Corimandel,
and I was heading up to New Year's Eve and
I looked in a window when I was because I
was walking along past a whole lot of batches, and
(22:36):
I looked in a window and there was a couple
and they were and I saw myself on television and
they were watching me on television, and you're watching that.
And I was watching them watching me from the window,
and I thought to myself, I need to knock on
the window here and go on. Was an episode of
seven chart and it was a New Year's Eve show.
Ah yeah, and I thought that'd be funny appearing and
(22:57):
then I and then I I didn't do it.
Speaker 3 (22:59):
It is this, it's been funny.
Speaker 2 (23:01):
Knock us if you Kevin knocked on the door and said, hey,
how's it going. Yeah, I've just noticed that you were
watching you on TV. I thought I was watching you
watching him, funny, watching you, watching you, watching me, watching you.
Speaker 3 (23:14):
Well, you're watching Jimmy exactly what I thought.
Speaker 2 (23:16):
What about if Hillary Barry had been with you and
you're watching you, watching them, and then you heard a
Russell and the bushes and then Hillary is hiding and
the bush.
Speaker 4 (23:24):
Watching you, watching me, watching watching me.
Speaker 5 (23:27):
Yeah, and depends what Russell though, because if you got
the Russell that I knew growing up, he would be
he was quite a big unit and there would be
scary Russell packer.
Speaker 4 (23:35):
I wouldn't want to put Hillary in a bush with
Russell Russell terrible.
Speaker 2 (23:40):
What about in a bush and Russell?
Speaker 4 (23:42):
I don't think she'd want to be in a bush.
She's not an a bush sort of a person.
Speaker 2 (23:47):
Well, my son went out the other day. I was
telling you guys, and he's seventeen and he went out
with his mates and he did a whole lot of damage.
Was closing us relaying when you're under twenty, you spend
a long time in bushes.
Speaker 3 (23:57):
Yeah, jumping into bushes.
Speaker 2 (23:58):
That's awesome. I love jumping and bus It's been so
much more time and undergrowth. It comes upon in your
life where you hardly ever find yourself an undergrowth. You're
twenty five now, mess have you been. When was the
last time you were in some undergrowth?
Speaker 4 (24:08):
Or it was the last time you jumped into a
flax bush, like a decent sized flax bush.
Speaker 2 (24:13):
When was the last time you just climbed a tree?
Speaker 5 (24:15):
I mean, these are all things that I haven't thought about.
This is a great typic of conversation. I remember like
looking at bushes like there were something to jump into.
Speaker 2 (24:22):
Yes, at one point in your life, you go you
just stop wanting to jump into every bush. You see.
Speaker 4 (24:29):
We used to ride our bikes and there was a
flax bush, like a really really big one, and we
would ride our bikes. Was kind of on the corner
of someone's property and on a burm, and we'd ride
our bikes down and then you'd leave your bike and
jump into the flax bush.
Speaker 3 (24:43):
God, it was fun.
Speaker 4 (24:43):
Oh man, I save one down the bottom of Chamblin Street.
We used to get drunk into it. And then one
day we were doing it and the guy came out
and goes, break your fucking and screamed out, and we
went hey, settled down, and then he goes, oh, I
do break your fuck and then his wife going get
off the balcony, John, Get off the balcony.
Speaker 3 (25:04):
John.
Speaker 4 (25:05):
Come in and he goes, I'm not coming out, and
they've got get in, John, and then we started saying, yeah, John,
get off John.
Speaker 3 (25:14):
Your dad's name John twelve because it wasn't my dad, okay.
Speaker 2 (25:18):
I had a sudden experience where I was jumping into
the spush with my mate Davy, and then we get
called into this house that was on the way up
the street that was next to our house, my house,
and they said and someone says, you broke wind and
make a mary?
Speaker 3 (25:36):
What?
Speaker 2 (25:37):
And then there was a girl, one of the daughters
in the house was crying. Me and Davy had been
jumping onto a flash book that she called win to
make a mary and they were like you but we
were called in. I was like, it took me a
long time as a I think I was about nine
to work out who when you get called into a house,
it smelled so much like garlic.
Speaker 4 (25:55):
Don't call don't name a flex bush.
Speaker 2 (25:58):
Yeah, so the only reason why you're upset the broken
wouldn't make him marrious because you've named the flexbush.
Speaker 3 (26:03):
Given it a personal you've given it human rights.
Speaker 2 (26:05):
So we've got a five year old girl over, we've
got a couple of happy parents. His house smell like garlic.
Yelling at me and davy feathers for breaking, wouldn't making merry? Like, well,
it was just a fucking flex books when I jumped
into it, I don't know it was one making merry.
And also flex bushes will react to the wind, but
they don't make it.
Speaker 4 (26:20):
They don't don't make the ones, but they're hard.
Speaker 3 (26:23):
You think flex.
Speaker 4 (26:26):
Good thing about jumping into a flex pushes it will
come back?
Speaker 3 (26:29):
Yeah, very hard to kill a flexbush.
Speaker 2 (26:32):
Yeah, it laughs at you. You you're jumping and you
think you sucking me up? Grass though, when making saying
I will be back, do't you I'll be back.
Speaker 5 (26:42):
The grass that you just used to grass whip up
your shins on y grass?
Speaker 3 (26:46):
What's it called?
Speaker 5 (26:47):
Their grass, cut their grass. Well, that's racist just because
it cuts you.
Speaker 2 (26:52):
I don't know what about thistles, Let's get rid of them.
Speaker 3 (26:58):
Jump into a gorse bush.
Speaker 2 (27:00):
There was no thistles and you could just wear bear
feet with gay abandon in the summer, but no thistles. Thanks, thanks, mate.
Speaker 3 (27:05):
Used to they used to call you the gorse bush,
didn't they. But there's just a little couple of pants,
a couple of little ples down there.
Speaker 2 (27:14):
Okay, all right, daisy pants, little daisy pants, little upside
down daisy pants, did they all right? Okay?
Speaker 4 (27:28):
I used to call you the egger panthers. They used
to call you the ring up where you shouldn't be.
Speaker 2 (27:33):
They called you the hydrange the way you smelled all right,
all right, Jesus, are you happy with it?
Speaker 5 (27:45):
Let's do it a Oh look what I just found
you Ready for this?
Speaker 3 (28:00):
It's time for Matt and Jerry's to your face off
Fridays back.
Speaker 2 (28:07):
Hello, I'm Matt Heath. You have been listening to the
Matt and Jerry Daily Bespoke podcast. Right now you can
listen to our Radio Highlights podcast, which you will absolutely
get barred up about anyway. Sit to download, like subscribe,
write review all those great things. It really helps myself
and Jerry and to a lesser extent, mess and ruder.
If you want to discuss anything raised in this pod,
(28:28):
check out the Conclave, a Matt and Jerry Facebook discussion group.
And while I'm plugging stuff, my book Are Lifeless Punishing
Thirteen Ways to Love the Life You've got is out
now get it wherever you get your books, or just
google the bastard. Anyway you seem busy, I'll let you go.
Bless Blessed, blessed. Give them a taste of key we
from me,
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