April 21, 2025 • 15 mins
April is Autism Awareness Month. And while we rightly celebrate diversity, we often shy away from discussing the unique challenges faced by families and those raising autistic children. Our guest is Julie Mower, executive director of The Phoenix Center, an accredited, not-for-profit school serving students with autism, multiple disabilities and intellectual disabilities in Nutley, NJ. For more, visit thephoenixcenternj.org.
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:01):
Welcome to Get Connected with Nina del Rio, a weekly
conversation about fitness, health and happenings in our community on
one oh six point seven Light FM.
Speaker 2 (00:12):
Thanks for listening to Get Connected. In April Autism Awareness Month,
and while we rightly celebrate diversity, we often shy away
from talking about the challenges faced by families and those
raising autistic children. Our guest is Julie Mauer. She's executive
director of the Phoenix Center and accredited not for profit
schools serving students with autism, multiple disabilities, and intellectual disabilities
(00:34):
in Nutley, New Jersey. Julie Mauer, welcome back to the show.
Speaker 3 (00:38):
Thank you so much, thanks for having me.
Speaker 2 (00:40):
You can find out more about the school at the
Phoenix Center nj dot org. And as we talk, Julie
about Autism Awareness Month, there's so many of these months
right there about history and causes and issues, and it's
important to celebrate these things. They're necessary, but I think
they can also be a little bit surface conversations. What
does sort of Autism Awareness Month mean to you? And
(01:03):
how do you want to use the platform?
Speaker 3 (01:05):
Lotism Awareness and Acceptance Month is so important because it
allows us as a community to just bring awareness to
others that it's not something that you need to be
afraid of, or it's not a bad thing, it's just
watism is just you know, it is a spectrum disorder
(01:27):
and it is something that needs to be celebrated.
Speaker 2 (01:30):
So what are some of Let's start with some of
those unique challenges, daily challenges that parents of autistic children
face and how do they impact caregivers and parents.
Speaker 3 (01:42):
Depending on the individual, the day to day can be
a real struggle for a family. You have self regulation
issues where an individual with watism might not know how
to regulate him or herself, might not understand that they're
feeling stressed out, and could result in a lot of
issues in the family unit as moms and dads understanding
(02:08):
what that looks like and how to manage it as
best as possible with anticipatory schedules, lists for the children
to know this is what we're doing today, even though
it's a weekend might be a little nonstructured, we still
have a little bit of structure to it, which gives
predictability to the individual, which then decreases the dysregulation issue.
Speaker 2 (02:32):
I think this would be true for any teacher, but
I'm thinking about you, particularly in this role. Every parent
is the first time being a parent and you're learning
all these things for the first time, and they know
their kid. But you see these things come up year
after year with student after student parents kind of getting
a handle on these things for the first time. Right,
it's got to be really interesting in a way to
(02:53):
sort of help people navigate logistical hurdles and all these
therapies time and time again.
Speaker 3 (03:00):
Yeah, educating the parents is just as important as educating
the individuals with autism or multiple disabilities, you know, letting
giving the parent the opportunity to speak with other parents
who are perhaps in their same situation. It gives them
(03:20):
a chance to develop relationships, which you know, relationships are everything,
and they're so helpful, you know, having a friend to
lean in on or someone to say, oh, yeah, I
was feeling the same way and this is what we did.
That's worth its weight in gold. So some of the
things that the Phoenix Center offer our opportunities to get
(03:43):
the families together. You know, we're not a neighborhood school.
We serve students in eight counties in fifty five sending districts,
So it's not as if you can just walk down
the block and meet with your neighbors and have tea.
So what we tried to do as we gather the
parents at the school on a regular basis, whoever's available,
(04:04):
and we will provide just social opportunities for them, the
kids as well siblings, which is really important. We provide
social skills groups for the students. We provide support groups
run by a school counselor for the families, which is
really vitally important. And it's times like that that really
(04:27):
provide the support that a parent needs because it's twenty
four to seven, it's a lot.
Speaker 2 (04:35):
You know what. You reminded me of a little bit
in a way. I had a conversation years ago with
a gentleman who was director of an agency placing foster kids,
and he said, you know, this is hard. You know,
these kids come with issues and problems, and they're also kids,
so they're dirty and messy, and they talk back to you,
and they do all the things that kids do. It's
not a walk in the park. So let's not pretend
(04:55):
like it's all just happy and joy and you have
to like build a support system around you to be
able to do these things.
Speaker 3 (05:03):
Yes, yeah, and that's key and that's one of the
things that you know, the Phoenix Center really strives to do.
It's part of our mission. You know, we're here for
the students, we're here for the families. That's so vitally
important because without that, the students are not going to
thrive without having that family support. So it's a whole package,
(05:24):
not just the students.
Speaker 2 (05:26):
Our guest is Julie Mauer. She's executive director of the
Phoenix Center and accredited not for profit schools serving the educational, behavioral,
and therapeutic needs of students from ages five to twenty
one living with autism, multiple disabilities, and intellectual disabilities in Nutley,
New Jersey. Again, as Julie mentioned, they serve children from
fifty six districts and eight counties throughout New Jersey. Their
(05:47):
website is the Phoenixcenter dot org. And you're listening to
get connected on one oh six point seven Light FM.
I'm Nina del Rio. Self care strategies. People need to
take care of themselves or they're not going to be
able to take care of anything else. Can you talk
about helping parents balance their responsibilities as caregivers with their
own emotional needs.
Speaker 3 (06:09):
As a parent, you want to provide for your child first,
like that's you, that's your natural go to. What our
job is to remind the parents and to help them
to remember to take care of themselves, because if they're
not up for the challenges of the day to day emotionally, physically,
(06:30):
it's just not going to work. So providing education to
the parents is so important. So we've brought in, We've
had nutritionists come in, we have had a variety of
different therapists come in to talk to the parents about
how to remember to take care of themselves because that's
so vitally important because if they're not there and ready,
(06:54):
it's just not going to work. And then also having
our staff provide some of the education on how to
set the stage up, so to speak, in the home
to make the opportunities of success more likely to happen.
That will also provide self care because things will go
(07:15):
a little bit more smoothly perhaps in the home.
Speaker 2 (07:18):
Can you think of a success story or any story
where you know increased emotional support or practical support for
parents has really made a tangible difference for them.
Speaker 3 (07:27):
Yes, I can think of so many stories, but I
have one in particular. I think I mentioned earlier that.
You know, we're not a neighborhood school. We're throughout a
very large catchment area in the state of New Jersey.
So we have a program called Family Night Out and
that's where we have the families come in after hours
with their children and the children's siblings if they would like.
(07:49):
And what has happened through this activity is we have
watched a mom's group of moms live all over the
state and they still years years now later, at least
this has been going on for at least five to
ten years. They still meet once a month and they
(08:13):
gather new moms when they come for a support group
or they come for an activity at the Phoenix Center.
And that's really that's the goal, is that emotional support
that you're providing each other. And so we're just fortunate
that we had the platform to be able to set
that stage and make that available to happen.
Speaker 2 (08:32):
Where do siblings come in at this too, because siblings
are a huge part of what's going on right at
home and trying to navigate their relationship with their parents
and all this stuff.
Speaker 3 (08:43):
Yeah, siblings, siblings, you know, they can kind of get
lost in the proverbial sauce of the day to day
for sure, because there's so much focus on the individual
with the challenges. So having the support groups available during
those activities that we have at the Phoenix Center is
(09:05):
very important. So just having you know whether it's playgroups
or again run by a counselor. It's typically play, but
sometimes it does turn out to be a little bit
more serious in terms of the support being provided by
a counselor to a particular sibling over any issue that
(09:26):
he or she may be experiencing in the home. So
having you know it's the parents and the siblings as well,
they need the support just as much as the moms
and the dads.
Speaker 2 (09:34):
What role does empathy play in making sure that parents
feel heard and understood by educators and healthcare providers and
the community.
Speaker 3 (09:42):
Well everyone needs empathy, right everyone. It's part of developing relationships,
it's part of developing trust with others as well. It
helps to feel inclusive if others have empathy towards you,
so you feel included in that circle. So empathy is
(10:03):
really very key.
Speaker 2 (10:04):
Can you think of an example from an experience at
your school that's made a difference where someone was actually
really heard and the situation changed, or you know, they
felt like they were getting what they needed to be
able to deal with something again.
Speaker 3 (10:22):
In our family night out because that's really one of
the best activities that we do have, one of the
many activities that we do have. And we had a
mom and dad drop their child off, fifteen year old
and they were all dressed very nicely, and I said, oh, wow,
where are you going? Are you staying? Are you going somewhere?
(10:42):
And they said, oh, we're going out to dinner and
I said, oh, that's lovely, have so much fun. And
in that conversation they had said that they had never
been out to dinner as a couple since their fifteen
year old was diagnosed. So that's a huge success story.
(11:03):
We were able to provide an opportunity to have some respite,
to have time together as a husband and wife, and
go out to dinner.
Speaker 2 (11:12):
For the first time in fifteen years.
Speaker 3 (11:13):
For the first time in fifteen years. Yeah, it was wonderful.
Speaker 2 (11:19):
So thinking about schools in general and service providers, what
action can they take, what could they do to better
address real life challenges parents and counter while raising autistic kids.
Speaker 3 (11:30):
Being there and available to really hear what the parent needs,
what the family unit needs is critical as an educator,
you know, we have to listen first and foremost to
be able to take action and to be able to
offer any kind of hurdle help potentially. We have set
(11:52):
up situations where we will do home visits. We will
come into the home and we will assist as needed,
you know what's happening, see the environment, and see how
we can change and manipulate things to make it a
little bit easier to navigate the daily life. And that
program also has been very critical in helping families, you know,
(12:17):
just their general set up in their home for success.
Speaker 2 (12:23):
Because you work with kids from all over the state.
It has to be more than just the people involved
in the school, doesn't it. It has to be I
don't know, maybe the church, maybe some community group the
parent is interested in, right, I mean, it's got to
be more than just this crowd.
Speaker 3 (12:41):
Oh absolutely, I mean we have the Phoenix Center has
an amazing community. We're in not Lean, Notly is a
very open and helpful community. We have a lot of
our local businesses who know us very well because we're
out and about all the time. The students go out
for community basinstr and leisure and rac activities in the community,
(13:05):
which is wonderful. So it's great for the kids because
they're learning how to navigate the world, the larger world,
and it's wonderful inclusive activity for the community members to
learn more about who we are and what we do.
So it's really it's a lovely little balance that happens there.
And we're very fortunate to have a very large outside
(13:28):
community of supporters. We have a lot of donors who
help us provide all of the programs and services that
we're able to do.
Speaker 2 (13:38):
And for people who are outside of your community who
just happen to be hearing this and have someone in
their world family who's got, you know, an autistic child
or a special needs child, what's the thing to do there,
what's the connection to make to sort of, you know,
help them along the way and support.
Speaker 3 (13:54):
Them, Educate, educate yourself about what's available up there, about
what types of schools are available for the child, for
the individual who may need the assistance, what types of
therapies are available in your community, your local community or
your border community, dependent on the need of the individual.
(14:14):
That's key.
Speaker 2 (14:15):
Also, like just anybody who's a caregiver helping them a
little bit, give them some time.
Speaker 3 (14:21):
Yeah, lend a hand whenever you can.
Speaker 2 (14:22):
Of course, April is Autism Awareness Month and you can
find out more about the Phoenix Center at the Phoenix
Centerenja dot org. Our guest has been Julie Mower. She's
executive director of the Phoenix Center in Netley, New Jersey. Julie,
thank you for being on the show.
Speaker 3 (14:37):
Thank you so much for having me have a wonderful day.
Speaker 1 (14:40):
This has been get connected with Nina del Rio on
one o six point seven light FM. The views and
opinions of our guests do not necessarily reflect the views
of the station. If you missed any part of our
show or want to share it, visit our website for
downloads and podcasts at one oh six to seven lightfm
dot com. Thanks for listening.
Welcome to Get Connected with Nina del Rio, a weekly
conversation about fitness, health and happenings in our community on
one oh six point seven Light FM.
Speaker 2 (00:12):
Thanks for listening to Get Connected. In April Autism Awareness Month,
and while we rightly celebrate diversity, we often shy away
from talking about the challenges faced by families and those
raising autistic children. Our guest is Julie Mauer. She's executive
director of the Phoenix Center and accredited not for profit
schools serving students with autism, multiple disabilities, and intellectual disabilities
(00:34):
in Nutley, New Jersey. Julie Mauer, welcome back to the show.
Speaker 3 (00:38):
Thank you so much, thanks for having me.
Speaker 2 (00:40):
You can find out more about the school at the
Phoenix Center nj dot org. And as we talk, Julie
about Autism Awareness Month, there's so many of these months
right there about history and causes and issues, and it's
important to celebrate these things. They're necessary, but I think
they can also be a little bit surface conversations. What
does sort of Autism Awareness Month mean to you? And
(01:03):
how do you want to use the platform?
Speaker 3 (01:05):
Lotism Awareness and Acceptance Month is so important because it
allows us as a community to just bring awareness to
others that it's not something that you need to be
afraid of, or it's not a bad thing, it's just
watism is just you know, it is a spectrum disorder
(01:27):
and it is something that needs to be celebrated.
Speaker 2 (01:30):
So what are some of Let's start with some of
those unique challenges, daily challenges that parents of autistic children
face and how do they impact caregivers and parents.
Speaker 3 (01:42):
Depending on the individual, the day to day can be
a real struggle for a family. You have self regulation
issues where an individual with watism might not know how
to regulate him or herself, might not understand that they're
feeling stressed out, and could result in a lot of
issues in the family unit as moms and dads understanding
(02:08):
what that looks like and how to manage it as
best as possible with anticipatory schedules, lists for the children
to know this is what we're doing today, even though
it's a weekend might be a little nonstructured, we still
have a little bit of structure to it, which gives
predictability to the individual, which then decreases the dysregulation issue.
Speaker 2 (02:32):
I think this would be true for any teacher, but
I'm thinking about you, particularly in this role. Every parent
is the first time being a parent and you're learning
all these things for the first time, and they know
their kid. But you see these things come up year
after year with student after student parents kind of getting
a handle on these things for the first time. Right,
it's got to be really interesting in a way to
(02:53):
sort of help people navigate logistical hurdles and all these
therapies time and time again.
Speaker 3 (03:00):
Yeah, educating the parents is just as important as educating
the individuals with autism or multiple disabilities, you know, letting
giving the parent the opportunity to speak with other parents
who are perhaps in their same situation. It gives them
(03:20):
a chance to develop relationships, which you know, relationships are everything,
and they're so helpful, you know, having a friend to
lean in on or someone to say, oh, yeah, I
was feeling the same way and this is what we did.
That's worth its weight in gold. So some of the
things that the Phoenix Center offer our opportunities to get
(03:43):
the families together. You know, we're not a neighborhood school.
We serve students in eight counties in fifty five sending districts,
So it's not as if you can just walk down
the block and meet with your neighbors and have tea.
So what we tried to do as we gather the
parents at the school on a regular basis, whoever's available,
(04:04):
and we will provide just social opportunities for them, the
kids as well siblings, which is really important. We provide
social skills groups for the students. We provide support groups
run by a school counselor for the families, which is
really vitally important. And it's times like that that really
(04:27):
provide the support that a parent needs because it's twenty
four to seven, it's a lot.
Speaker 2 (04:35):
You know what. You reminded me of a little bit
in a way. I had a conversation years ago with
a gentleman who was director of an agency placing foster kids,
and he said, you know, this is hard. You know,
these kids come with issues and problems, and they're also kids,
so they're dirty and messy, and they talk back to you,
and they do all the things that kids do. It's
not a walk in the park. So let's not pretend
(04:55):
like it's all just happy and joy and you have
to like build a support system around you to be
able to do these things.
Speaker 3 (05:03):
Yes, yeah, and that's key and that's one of the
things that you know, the Phoenix Center really strives to do.
It's part of our mission. You know, we're here for
the students, we're here for the families. That's so vitally
important because without that, the students are not going to
thrive without having that family support. So it's a whole package,
(05:24):
not just the students.
Speaker 2 (05:26):
Our guest is Julie Mauer. She's executive director of the
Phoenix Center and accredited not for profit schools serving the educational, behavioral,
and therapeutic needs of students from ages five to twenty
one living with autism, multiple disabilities, and intellectual disabilities in Nutley,
New Jersey. Again, as Julie mentioned, they serve children from
fifty six districts and eight counties throughout New Jersey. Their
(05:47):
website is the Phoenixcenter dot org. And you're listening to
get connected on one oh six point seven Light FM.
I'm Nina del Rio. Self care strategies. People need to
take care of themselves or they're not going to be
able to take care of anything else. Can you talk
about helping parents balance their responsibilities as caregivers with their
own emotional needs.
Speaker 3 (06:09):
As a parent, you want to provide for your child first,
like that's you, that's your natural go to. What our
job is to remind the parents and to help them
to remember to take care of themselves, because if they're
not up for the challenges of the day to day emotionally, physically,
(06:30):
it's just not going to work. So providing education to
the parents is so important. So we've brought in, We've
had nutritionists come in, we have had a variety of
different therapists come in to talk to the parents about
how to remember to take care of themselves because that's
so vitally important because if they're not there and ready,
(06:54):
it's just not going to work. And then also having
our staff provide some of the education on how to
set the stage up, so to speak, in the home
to make the opportunities of success more likely to happen.
That will also provide self care because things will go
(07:15):
a little bit more smoothly perhaps in the home.
Speaker 2 (07:18):
Can you think of a success story or any story
where you know increased emotional support or practical support for
parents has really made a tangible difference for them.
Speaker 3 (07:27):
Yes, I can think of so many stories, but I
have one in particular. I think I mentioned earlier that.
You know, we're not a neighborhood school. We're throughout a
very large catchment area in the state of New Jersey.
So we have a program called Family Night Out and
that's where we have the families come in after hours
with their children and the children's siblings if they would like.
(07:49):
And what has happened through this activity is we have
watched a mom's group of moms live all over the
state and they still years years now later, at least
this has been going on for at least five to
ten years. They still meet once a month and they
(08:13):
gather new moms when they come for a support group
or they come for an activity at the Phoenix Center.
And that's really that's the goal, is that emotional support
that you're providing each other. And so we're just fortunate
that we had the platform to be able to set
that stage and make that available to happen.
Speaker 2 (08:32):
Where do siblings come in at this too, because siblings
are a huge part of what's going on right at
home and trying to navigate their relationship with their parents
and all this stuff.
Speaker 3 (08:43):
Yeah, siblings, siblings, you know, they can kind of get
lost in the proverbial sauce of the day to day
for sure, because there's so much focus on the individual
with the challenges. So having the support groups available during
those activities that we have at the Phoenix Center is
(09:05):
very important. So just having you know whether it's playgroups
or again run by a counselor. It's typically play, but
sometimes it does turn out to be a little bit
more serious in terms of the support being provided by
a counselor to a particular sibling over any issue that
(09:26):
he or she may be experiencing in the home. So
having you know it's the parents and the siblings as well,
they need the support just as much as the moms
and the dads.
Speaker 2 (09:34):
What role does empathy play in making sure that parents
feel heard and understood by educators and healthcare providers and
the community.
Speaker 3 (09:42):
Well everyone needs empathy, right everyone. It's part of developing relationships,
it's part of developing trust with others as well. It
helps to feel inclusive if others have empathy towards you,
so you feel included in that circle. So empathy is
(10:03):
really very key.
Speaker 2 (10:04):
Can you think of an example from an experience at
your school that's made a difference where someone was actually
really heard and the situation changed, or you know, they
felt like they were getting what they needed to be
able to deal with something again.
Speaker 3 (10:22):
In our family night out because that's really one of
the best activities that we do have, one of the
many activities that we do have. And we had a
mom and dad drop their child off, fifteen year old
and they were all dressed very nicely, and I said, oh, wow,
where are you going? Are you staying? Are you going somewhere?
(10:42):
And they said, oh, we're going out to dinner and
I said, oh, that's lovely, have so much fun. And
in that conversation they had said that they had never
been out to dinner as a couple since their fifteen
year old was diagnosed. So that's a huge success story.
(11:03):
We were able to provide an opportunity to have some respite,
to have time together as a husband and wife, and
go out to dinner.
Speaker 2 (11:12):
For the first time in fifteen years.
Speaker 3 (11:13):
For the first time in fifteen years. Yeah, it was wonderful.
Speaker 2 (11:19):
So thinking about schools in general and service providers, what
action can they take, what could they do to better
address real life challenges parents and counter while raising autistic kids.
Speaker 3 (11:30):
Being there and available to really hear what the parent needs,
what the family unit needs is critical as an educator,
you know, we have to listen first and foremost to
be able to take action and to be able to
offer any kind of hurdle help potentially. We have set
(11:52):
up situations where we will do home visits. We will
come into the home and we will assist as needed,
you know what's happening, see the environment, and see how
we can change and manipulate things to make it a
little bit easier to navigate the daily life. And that
program also has been very critical in helping families, you know,
(12:17):
just their general set up in their home for success.
Speaker 2 (12:23):
Because you work with kids from all over the state.
It has to be more than just the people involved
in the school, doesn't it. It has to be I
don't know, maybe the church, maybe some community group the
parent is interested in, right, I mean, it's got to
be more than just this crowd.
Speaker 3 (12:41):
Oh absolutely, I mean we have the Phoenix Center has
an amazing community. We're in not Lean, Notly is a
very open and helpful community. We have a lot of
our local businesses who know us very well because we're
out and about all the time. The students go out
for community basinstr and leisure and rac activities in the community,
(13:05):
which is wonderful. So it's great for the kids because
they're learning how to navigate the world, the larger world,
and it's wonderful inclusive activity for the community members to
learn more about who we are and what we do.
So it's really it's a lovely little balance that happens there.
And we're very fortunate to have a very large outside
(13:28):
community of supporters. We have a lot of donors who
help us provide all of the programs and services that
we're able to do.
Speaker 2 (13:38):
And for people who are outside of your community who
just happen to be hearing this and have someone in
their world family who's got, you know, an autistic child
or a special needs child, what's the thing to do there,
what's the connection to make to sort of, you know,
help them along the way and support.
Speaker 3 (13:54):
Them, Educate, educate yourself about what's available up there, about
what types of schools are available for the child, for
the individual who may need the assistance, what types of
therapies are available in your community, your local community or
your border community, dependent on the need of the individual.
(14:14):
That's key.
Speaker 2 (14:15):
Also, like just anybody who's a caregiver helping them a
little bit, give them some time.
Speaker 3 (14:21):
Yeah, lend a hand whenever you can.
Speaker 2 (14:22):
Of course, April is Autism Awareness Month and you can
find out more about the Phoenix Center at the Phoenix
Centerenja dot org. Our guest has been Julie Mower. She's
executive director of the Phoenix Center in Netley, New Jersey. Julie,
thank you for being on the show.
Speaker 3 (14:37):
Thank you so much for having me have a wonderful day.
Speaker 1 (14:40):
This has been get connected with Nina del Rio on
one o six point seven light FM. The views and
opinions of our guests do not necessarily reflect the views
of the station. If you missed any part of our
show or want to share it, visit our website for
downloads and podcasts at one oh six to seven lightfm
dot com. Thanks for listening.
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Dateline NBC
Current and classic episodes, featuring compelling true-crime mysteries, powerful documentaries and in-depth investigations. Follow now to get the latest episodes of Dateline NBC completely free, or subscribe to Dateline Premium for ad-free listening and exclusive bonus content: DatelinePremium.com