December 25, 2024 • 33 mins
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Speaker 1 (00:00):
You know, it's hard to find something unique for somebody nowadays.
Last year, my wife gave me a star as a
Christmas gift. I thought that was so sweet and so thoughtful.
Speaker 2 (00:09):
You know.
Speaker 1 (00:09):
It came with a certificate, kid a chart to show
you where it was in the sky.
Speaker 3 (00:13):
They named it after me. It was really great.
Speaker 1 (00:15):
And then it dawned to me that most of the
stars that we see in the sky don't exist anymore.
They burnt out years ago, and we're seeing the light
coming from white years away at us. So basically, last
year my wife got me nothing. She may as well
have gotten me a gift card from Blockbuster Video. I mean,
(00:35):
you know, Amazon said that if I like a star,
well I might also like an echo from the Grand Canyon.
Speaker 4 (00:46):
Our creative director Jim Mudd, who joined the show. Actually
I was going to say earlier this year, but actually
it was in November of last year. We found out
in September that we would be guest hosting for the
Rush Limbaugh Show, but we were asked not to announce
that yet, but we began preparing for the It was
(01:06):
about ten days at Christmas, and so I brought Jim
Mudd on to help us staff up, and it was
kind of a trial run to see if he was
going to be able to keep up, because we produce
a lot and well, i'll leave it at that, not
everyone could keep up, and it turned out he was
such a great addition to the show that he developed
into being our creative director and it's been a big
(01:30):
boon to our show and a lot of times, a
lot of segments we do, he will pull together a
news story and maybe some audio and audio clip to
go with that, or he might write a parody. Chance
McClain makes a lot of our funny songs, but Jim
has also started writing more and more of our parodies.
And whether it's a song that's chosen to go with
(01:51):
a segment or soundclip or parody, he will write a
little background for us as to why he wrote that,
And the background is not meant to be shared on air.
It's not part of the segment. It's just for us
to know why he considered that newsworthy. And a lot
of times I will take what he has written and
I will work.
Speaker 5 (02:11):
That into my own narrative.
Speaker 4 (02:12):
I'll call it my truth. Ramon my truth. Let gonna
start using liberal language. I will speak my truth. I
will find my voice anyway. I'll take what he's written
about something and I'll say, well, that's not accurate, that's
not my perspective. But here, let me make it my perspective.
And he will have been.
Speaker 5 (02:30):
The conversation starter.
Speaker 4 (02:32):
But he wrote a little background for us, and I
liked it so much that I asked him to record
what he had written for y'all to hear from Jim
at Christmas in his own voice, really, ramon, that's what
you seriously.
Speaker 6 (02:52):
As I get older, I find myself reflecting on the
Christmases of my childhood. I look back and I long
for those days. I remember that my parents will let
us open one gift, and that was before we went
to my grandma's house. It was always the Christmas outfit
and new shoes that we would wear to Grandma's and
then later to church, and we would always get excited,
and not because we were happy to get some nice clothes. No,
(03:12):
it was because we knew it was time to get
ready and go to Grandmas soon. Christmas at Grandma's was
the best. Everyone was there, all my aunts, uncles and cousins,
and they would be dressed up too, and they were
happy to see you. Now, my grandma only lived three
blocks away from us, and I used to walk down
there all the time, But on Christmas she may as
well have been across the country because that drive took forever. Now,
(03:33):
Dad would pull up and let Mom out in front
of the house, and I would ride with them to
find a spot to park the car. Now, we had
a big family, so there were a lot of people
there and you had to find a spot down the
street to park. I know now that this was more
than just my dad making me feel like I've grown up,
because you know, he needed help with the presents. Now,
it really was him showing me that my mom was
worth letting out at the door. He didn't want her
to walk all the way down the street and her
(03:55):
good shoes and they were probably new too, and you
know how new shoes can be. We would get the
gifts that we brought for the gift exchange and head
to the house. Now, when we walked through that back door,
everyone agrees with a hug and a Merry Christmas. My
grandma would have the biggest smile on her face, probably
because I was her favorite. It's a fact. Everyone knew it.
Everyone knew that I was the favorite, but a little
(04:16):
bit because it was Christmas. She would give you a
big hug and tell you to go put your coat
in Grandpa's room. Now, Grandma and Grandpa slept in separate
rooms at this point, and if you asked them why
they slept in separate rooms, they would both say that
the other one snored too loud and they couldn't sleep.
Besides the warm welcome, the smell of Grandma's house was amazing.
The smell of food and baked goods, cookies, pies, I
(04:38):
mean it filled the air. My grandma, and I'm sure
like yours was a great cook. Sinatra, Jerry Mathis, Nat
King Cole, Elvis was surely playing on the stereo at
a volume just loud enough to be heard under the
conversation happening throughout the house. Now, as a kid, you're
excited about getting presents. Now that I'm all grown up,
(04:58):
I really can't remember anything that ever got a Grandma's Honestly,
not one thing. Turns out it wasn't as important as
I thought at the time. Now, I do remember one
gift that my grandpa got my grandma. He was so
excited to give it to her. He wrapped it all
by himself, and he waited to the very end of
the gift exchange for her to open it. She was
all smiles opening that box. But let me give you
(05:20):
some background on my grandpa. He was not the romantic type,
not at all.
Speaker 5 (05:24):
Now.
Speaker 6 (05:24):
He loved my grandma, he had or her. He worshiped
the ground she walked on. But he was not the
romantic type, and he wasn't going to get her jewelry
or anything like that. He was practical. He had grown
up on a farm during the Depression and fought the Nazis.
He worked at the gas company for forty years and
fished every weekend. He was very much a function overformed
kind of fellow. So when she opened her present to
find a shiny, brand new fire extinguisher for the house,
(05:48):
she shouldn't have been as surprised as she was. He
was beaming and she was seething. You see, Grandpa thought
that that extinguisher was a sign of just how much
he loved her. He wanted her to be safe if
in a fire broke out, and he took that fire
extinguisher and he mounted it on the wall right outside
her bedroom door. Now, that fire extinguisher outlasted Grandma and
was still hanging on the wall when Grandpa sold the
(06:09):
house fifteen years later. It was a lasting monument of
his love to her. I can never go back and
relive those moments. Those are gone forever. But I still
carry with me the greatest gift that I've ever received
at Grandma's house, the love that was in that house.
That love is what I bring with me as I
make the rounds this Christmas. The love from Grandma's house
is the love that my kids will carry with them
(06:30):
as they get older and have families with their own.
That love has endured longer than any material gift ever
could longer, even than that fire extinguisher.
Speaker 7 (06:41):
I don't have a monkey pox, can't bend over to them,
wear my socks.
Speaker 8 (06:48):
I think Michael Berry.
Speaker 6 (06:50):
Rock, Michael Very's show.
Speaker 2 (07:02):
Oh Holy Night, the stars are rightly shine. It is
the knight of hardy SATs burn.
Speaker 3 (07:23):
Longly, the world.
Speaker 2 (07:27):
Insane and replied.
Speaker 3 (07:32):
Till he honey and soul felt its well.
Speaker 6 (07:43):
A thrill love.
Speaker 2 (07:47):
Lowy reworld rejoice, says before yonder.
Speaker 9 (07:56):
A new one, long.
Speaker 5 (07:59):
Small on.
Speaker 8 (08:04):
On the first day of Kuans my children's asd it
me Mama, what is Kwanza for anyway? On the second
day of kwans to some lady boyther me, I curse
her out, and I say, no, I don't want no
old of meal pictures and quick colin over here.
Speaker 6 (08:21):
On that third day of.
Speaker 8 (08:22):
Kwans I went out to the stove. I need beer
and cigarettes, but they was closed, so I smashed out
the windows, did a drive by and cursed mall hour.
Speaker 6 (08:32):
On the fourth day of.
Speaker 8 (08:33):
Kuan so I turned on the TV Young and the Restless,
all of my children's one day, two lives, and then
oh broh. At four old clock on the fifth day
of Kuan's my check came.
Speaker 10 (08:47):
In the mail a FBC.
Speaker 8 (08:53):
Thank you Lord. I said, come on, kids, let's go
to the stove for some colored greensham hocks and some cheese.
On the sixth day of Quantz, the police rang the bell.
They served a warrant.
Speaker 3 (09:08):
I nearly passed it out, but it was okay.
Speaker 8 (09:13):
Someone money had said I stole her wigs, but I
told them all I would give them back anyway. On
their self day off Kwanza, I voted myself a drink,
A drank, sarted ounces God really full, then lost my mind.
I drove down the street, cursing out everyone I saw.
(09:36):
Then I bashed the katak upside of Dirk Queen. On
the eighth day of Kwanza, I bought a TV guy.
Not much had happened. I was hungover from a bad
headache from schlitzmot liquor. I try to.
Speaker 6 (09:54):
Stay home and be quiet, take my nerve pills. You
can just feel quantsa.
Speaker 3 (10:00):
In the air.
Speaker 8 (10:02):
On the ninth day of kuans that I painted all
my nails two shades of perf for one shade of turquoise.
Stoat on some glitter. Did I'm up real nice?
Speaker 6 (10:12):
I had looked bit good. Then I drove on down two.
Speaker 8 (10:18):
Pop Eyes, bought me some chicken, and I stayed at
home and looked at TV. On the tails day of quans,
the shoplifting was the thing. Ten now or Lady's nine
little candles, eight canser tuna fish, seven little nicknackt, six
pack of Budweiser, five lee press on nails, four pieces
(10:41):
of gum, three large fries. Two days back in jail,
it was Kwan's, Uh, what the hell? On the eleventh
day of Kuans, I got out on me parole.
Speaker 6 (10:53):
I rolled a big Joink went down to the.
Speaker 3 (10:55):
Church and talked all out my head.
Speaker 6 (10:57):
God happen, shouted.
Speaker 8 (10:58):
Passed out on holiday call nine one one, and the
Lord set me free, gave my test a money, steps
on home, didn't even remember where I stayed, and I
woke up real hungry and confused.
Speaker 2 (11:15):
Lloyd.
Speaker 8 (11:16):
On the twelfth day of Quins, my children's gathered around me,
Lincoln and Alvera, Ruganlo Lemangelo and around Gelo ten Acton
and Tim, Tasia, Kim Martina and Filopia, Shadda and Shamika,
von Keisha and Simonella Chlamedia, Champagne, d my Torria, Saska,
(11:41):
Tune Cheito and school Keisha. And it had really started
to feel more like it.
Speaker 11 (11:47):
It was getting near.
Speaker 4 (11:48):
Quin I do love me some Shirley ce lickor romote.
Every time you hear the twelve Days of Quanzo, what
immediately comes to mind? The twelve Days of Christmas. No,
you're lying, then tell me what it's about. Tell me
(12:11):
what it's about. Then I'm gonna look it up real quick.
While I'm looking it up, tell me the gist of
the movie. It's like groundhog Day for some girl reliving
the same date over and over on Christmas Eve. Okay,
let me see what this says. A story that follows Kate,
a young woman who, after a horrible blind date on
(12:34):
Christmas Eve, wakes up to find she is reliving that
same day and date all over again. Okay, I'm sorry
I ever doubted you.
Speaker 5 (12:47):
Well.
Speaker 4 (12:47):
It always makes me think of Chance McLean's Twelve Days
of Christmas Joe Biden version.
Speaker 11 (12:56):
On the first day of Christmas, Joe Biden gave to
me my son Hunters cray on masterpiece. On the second
day of Chris, Miss Joe Biden gave to me two
weeks of shutdowns and his son Hunters gray on masterpiece.
On the third day of Chris, Miss Joe Biden gave
to me boone doggle, two more weeks of shutdowns, and
(13:19):
his son Hunters pray on masterpiece.
Speaker 12 (13:23):
On the fourth day of Chris, Miss.
Speaker 10 (13:25):
Joe Biden gave to me four trillion dollar boon doggle,
two more weeks of shutdowns, and his son's useless pray
on masterpiece. On the fifth day of Chris, Miss Joe Biden.
Speaker 2 (13:37):
Gave to me five come on Man, four.
Speaker 10 (13:43):
Trillion dollar boon doggle, two months of shutdowns and his
son Hunters Gray on Masterpiece.
Speaker 12 (13:50):
On the sixth day of Chris, Miss.
Speaker 10 (13:52):
Joe Biden gave to me six Kamala cackles, five come
on Man, four trillion dollar boon dogle, two more months
of shutdowns, and his son Hunters Gray on Masterpiece. On
the seventh day of Chris, Miss Joe Biden gave to
me seventh wawell, six Kamala.
Speaker 3 (14:14):
Cackles, five come on Man, four.
Speaker 10 (14:19):
Trillion dollar boon, doggle, two more months of shutdowns, and
his son Hunters Gray on Masterpiece.
Speaker 3 (14:26):
On the eighth day of Chris, Miss.
Speaker 10 (14:28):
Joe Biden gave to me eight feds of faking, seven
s wallwell, six Kamala cackles, five come on man, come
four trillion dollar boon doggle, two more months of shutdowns,
and his son Stupid Gray on Masterpiece.
Speaker 13 (14:46):
On the ninth day of Chris, Miss Joe.
Speaker 10 (14:48):
Biden gave to me nine sake circle backs, eight feds
of faking.
Speaker 14 (14:53):
Seven s wawell, six Kamala cackles, cb to come on man,
come f trillion dollar boon doggle, two more months of shutdowns,
and his son Hunters Gray on Masterpiece.
Speaker 10 (15:07):
On the tenth day of Chris, Miss Joe Biden gave
to me ten percent inflation, nine Psaki circle backs, eight
feds of baking, seven Swahwell six, Kamala catles.
Speaker 3 (15:18):
Five, Come on Man, four.
Speaker 10 (15:22):
Trillion dollar boon Doggle, two more months of shutdowns, and
his son Hunters Gray on Masterpiece.
Speaker 15 (15:29):
On the eleventh day of Chris, Miss Joe Biden gave
to me eleven dirty doctors, ten percent inflation, nine Saki
circle backs, eight feds of baking, sevens Wahwell six, Kamala
cackles five, Come on Man.
Speaker 10 (15:46):
Four trillion dollar boon Dogle, two more months of shutdowns,
and his son Hunters Gray on Masterpiece. On the twelfth
day of Chris, Miss Joe Biden gave to me twelve
months of failure, eleven dirty doctors, ten percent inflation, nine
to sack circle backs, eight fence of faking, seven swallow sis, Kamala.
Speaker 16 (16:07):
Cattles five, Come on Man, four trillion dollar boondog a,
two years of shutdowns, and his son Hunters Gray on
master Peace.
Speaker 17 (16:22):
Come on, you said, you said, I'm seriously with his
finger on the pulse. The King of Team continues on
The Michael Berry Show.
Speaker 3 (16:47):
Oh there's no place like Oh.
Speaker 4 (16:53):
The yeared in songs and silliness started off with a bang,
or rather a rip.
Speaker 5 (17:02):
Some of you will remember. I mean, I didn't talk
much about it.
Speaker 4 (17:07):
But a few of you who were close to me
may have heard a very audible rip. The rich the rip,
not the rich. The rip I'm talking about that I
am painfully aware of, Ramon, was the sound of my
calf muscle ripping away from the bone in the tragic
(17:29):
injury in the very dangerous game of pickleball. You can
imagine my surprise when the very day after this tragic event.
By the way, I've won the match, so you can
tell Ray Sinkowitz and Ike clay Pool and Clay Conley
not only did they get their asses whip, but they
got their asses whipped by a guy with a ripped
(17:50):
taff that.
Speaker 5 (17:51):
Had come off the bone.
Speaker 4 (17:52):
The next day, I came into the studio after having
having informed my dear friend Chance McClain, while I'm being
treated for the KLF bustle that has ripped off the bone.
Speaker 5 (18:07):
I'm literally at the.
Speaker 4 (18:09):
Hospital clinic and I come in and without me knowing,
Ramon starts the show because they were in cahoots to
this hateful little diddy. I deserve better than this. I
did rebound, by the way, like a champ. I played
hurt like a man. I still wins.
Speaker 5 (18:29):
Not gonna lie to you. I still wins when I
think about it.
Speaker 4 (18:32):
But they asked that this be in the year in
review of Chance McClain comedy songs, and being the bigger man,
I'm going to allow it. Based on the Beg's hit
song of nineteen seventy six, Tragedy, Here's calf tragedy.
Speaker 5 (19:26):
All right, enough of that nonsense.
Speaker 4 (19:28):
Next up, we moved from the disco of the seventies
into a parody of a song that belongs on.
Speaker 5 (19:34):
The mount Rushmore of eighties pop.
Speaker 4 (19:38):
You got beat it, Come on, Eileen, take on Me,
and this one from the Breakfast Club Don't You Forget
About Me? From Simple Minds. I like it because it
was a particular song from a particular movie that I
happened to like from the eighties little off brand, but
I liked it. With a song this iconic and a
president this moronic, of course, he came up with Biden
(20:01):
Forgets Everything as a parody on Don't You Forget About Me?
As a president Joe Biden leaves a lot to be
desired as an order. The man is an unmitigated disaster.
It's not just a foot and mouth disease and mumble mouthing,
it's everything. He forgets everything. Your president said all of that,
(20:27):
and we made it into a song.
Speaker 18 (20:31):
By the same.
Speaker 3 (20:48):
George boyd is.
Speaker 19 (20:56):
Corn was corn was.
Speaker 20 (21:00):
A bad bade Obamba started. You're mad lion, Dolphace money soldier,
you win back an you ain't black and look look.
Speaker 17 (21:22):
Fast weak o. So scre.
Speaker 3 (21:40):
Bye boy gets everything.
Speaker 17 (21:46):
Bye bye, good bye, and mind by.
Speaker 3 (21:52):
Boy gets everything. Pass the taste go.
Speaker 5 (22:06):
Let's bring it in a little closer to home on
the next one.
Speaker 4 (22:08):
From the White House in DC, all the way to
Montgomery County, where a certain congressman I regrettably helped get elected,
decided to get in a pissing match with an eighteen
year old young woman at a Republican county meeting. If
you recall, Dan Crenshaw was pontificating and the concept of
faith came up, not the George Michaels, but actual faith
(22:31):
in a higher power. Crenshaw snapped at the young lady,
and we snapped at the opportunity to clown the establishment,
Republican John McCain wannabe. Don't question Dan Crenshaw's faith. Don't
you dare peasant constituent, don't.
Speaker 20 (22:48):
Do it.
Speaker 18 (22:54):
Nice, blastizing, contorts, chop bolt of insa.
Speaker 3 (23:00):
I like to swap He's now. I've only been home twice.
Speaker 10 (23:05):
Once was a photo opportunity, then a Montgomery County Q
today that didn't go so well.
Speaker 3 (23:13):
There was a bright young lady who had.
Speaker 21 (23:17):
A problem with one of my awesome.
Speaker 3 (23:21):
Verba don't quotes where she acted like a.
Speaker 22 (23:25):
Baby who needs a bob.
Speaker 21 (23:29):
I dress said to old girl down, and I told
her she should know not to question my face.
Speaker 3 (23:36):
Don't't question my face. I want to question of my
faith to face the face. Don't watch in my.
Speaker 18 (23:42):
Faith to faith to face every We used to be
best to charms.
Speaker 3 (23:48):
We drank bourbon, had some fun. We were two peas
in a pod.
Speaker 18 (23:53):
Every thing he said about Greg Abby was unbared.
Speaker 3 (24:00):
He madded was a lightning rod.
Speaker 22 (24:03):
And so I made a story advertizing.
Speaker 18 (24:09):
I tried to faint my boy in a man life question.
Speaker 15 (24:14):
I said, I am the test through my side.
Speaker 3 (24:19):
But he read them on the air in the medicine
how I lost the fight, didn't ques.
Speaker 10 (24:26):
Didn't question my face, question my faith, the faith, don't
qush my faith.
Speaker 17 (24:34):
You're listening to.
Speaker 5 (24:35):
The Michael Berry's show.
Speaker 2 (24:47):
Melcha is a thing to say.
Speaker 5 (24:52):
One of the.
Speaker 4 (24:53):
Big stories and one of our favorite stories, and it
fits in with this theme of people pushing back, people
fighting back, common people, not famous people, not wealthy people,
people risking it all their livelihood, in some cases their lives,
but certainly their livelihood. And the Freedom Convoy. Who would
(25:15):
have thought that Canadian truckers would steal our hearts? Those
fellows were protested the COVID vaccine and we couldn't have
been prouder.
Speaker 5 (25:26):
So Chance went all c W. McCall with a song
called Freedom Convoy.
Speaker 9 (25:30):
The small fringe minority of people who are on their
way to Ottawa or who are holding unacceptable views that
they're expressing do not represent the views of Canadians who
have been there for each other break.
Speaker 12 (25:51):
Or break of one to nine. This year's the Free Canuck.
You got a copy on me, pig pick, Come on,
Oh yeah, for sure, for sure, my golly is clean
clear to Ottawa. Come on, yeah, that's a big ten
four there, pig pen. Yeah, we definitely got the front
door good buddy, Mercy sakes alive. Looks like we got
ourselves a freedom convoy.
Speaker 13 (26:14):
For two years now, every government around been closing in
on US mandates, vaccine, shutting down schools. We finally had enough,
and you never know where and you never know how
resistance will spring forth Southwest airlines, pissed off moms or
truckers way up north.
Speaker 19 (26:32):
Freedom con by tonight we got freedom cod.
Speaker 3 (26:40):
Come on Joy, do con.
Speaker 10 (26:44):
We got con.
Speaker 12 (26:49):
Come breaker. This here's knuck rumor? Has it beginness? Book
of World Records is on the horn. They're saying this
already a record. We ain't even started yet.
Speaker 3 (27:01):
Come back.
Speaker 13 (27:02):
Fifty miles of big rigs and one hundred more of cars,
pickup trucks and SUVs cheering on the stars.
Speaker 3 (27:10):
Trudeau tries to downplay it.
Speaker 13 (27:12):
The media ignore good luck black holing ten million tons
of thunder at your door.
Speaker 19 (27:20):
Freedom Convoy the nights, Freedom Conutiful site, Come on Joy,
Canada cone.
Speaker 17 (27:37):
On a Winnipeg street A convoy of trucks and other
vehicles protest vaccine mandates.
Speaker 11 (27:43):
Ottawa police are preparing for truckers and supporters from across
Canada descending on the nation's capital.
Speaker 6 (27:49):
Saturday.
Speaker 13 (27:49):
Sure this is happening way up north in America's cold hat.
But there are red blooded patriots in them rigs, and
you can be sure of that they salute the flag.
Speaker 12 (27:59):
Love, Mom and Dad, never quit and never forget love,
guns and God and bubby dogs ain't having.
Speaker 3 (28:05):
A great reset. So when you see a big rig.
Speaker 23 (28:07):
On the road, go The driver in that calv probably
ain't sipping a Chai latte, and he don't vote Democrat.
Let this be your example if you were rating on
a sign to take our country.
Speaker 14 (28:20):
Back by God, right now is the time, Because Cony.
Speaker 3 (28:29):
Coy in common.
Speaker 4 (28:49):
Another story that still exists is of the busting of
illegals all across the country. Some things haven't changed. I
think this is one of our best songs, not just
in regards to lyrics, but his phrasing was so good.
Speaker 5 (29:04):
I hope you are thanks for.
Speaker 3 (29:07):
The ride on the spose. I got onto it because.
Speaker 7 (29:15):
I crossed the reel ground looking for the promised land.
Speaker 3 (29:23):
This is a very nice pause. I like how my
blue seedar choice.
Speaker 7 (29:30):
The air conditioner works very well. Back at Homies hot
as hell? Where are we going on this spouse? The
bathroom in the back discuss I've been on it for
a long long time. That was the Arkansas state line.
(29:55):
I think I live in On this bus, there are
like eighty.
Speaker 3 (30:00):
Five of us. I've been riding four life fourteen days.
Speaker 7 (30:07):
Am I still in the USA? Why didn't they stop?
Dispose that bus driver ride.
Speaker 3 (30:17):
On for us? He said it out or they ors me.
We'll go on to Washington, d C. Washington, DC, My
new home is in DC. Take me back to Mexico
co cit.
Speaker 5 (30:40):
Remember monkey pox.
Speaker 4 (30:42):
Oh, you were supposed to be very scared, and they
wanted you to believe that anybody could get monkey pox,
whether you were engaged in butt secks or not. But
finally people realized, no, if I'm not having butt sex,
I don't really have anything to worry about nasty looking
(31:02):
blisters all over the place. It was supposed to be
the next COVID, except it was for gay dudes, and
it only affected gay dudes. And if gay dudes didn't
have gay sex, they didn't get monkey pocks. But that
didn't stop the government from trying to push it on
us as another way to control us. Well, chance came
(31:25):
up with and I'm not proud of this, but if
we don't laugh, We'll have to cry, monkey pocks blisters
in the sun.
Speaker 20 (31:48):
Went to a party.
Speaker 22 (31:49):
I got drunk, passed out on the floor.
Speaker 10 (31:52):
It was full of dudes.
Speaker 22 (31:54):
They got nude and woke up sick and sword monkey
barss gym blisters on my butt, monkey bars, gay orgies
are no funs.
Speaker 10 (32:09):
All my lesions, day, my sheets, and I looked like
got the fly.
Speaker 18 (32:14):
I am a leper, skin is Pepper with her piece
Simplex nine, monkey bars, gay mae blisters on my face,
monkey bars, gay orgies are not saved.
Speaker 3 (32:35):
Went to a party.
Speaker 21 (32:36):
I got drunk, passed out on the floor. It was
full of dudes. They got nude. I woke up, silk
and sword my lesion, stay my sheets, I look like
god fly. I am a leper, skinness Pepper with her pie, Simplex.
Speaker 18 (32:54):
Nine, monkey bars and gay me blisters on my butt,
mumpy bos.
Speaker 3 (33:02):
Gay orgies are no funs.
You know, it's hard to find something unique for somebody nowadays.
Last year, my wife gave me a star as a
Christmas gift. I thought that was so sweet and so thoughtful.
Speaker 2 (00:09):
You know.
Speaker 1 (00:09):
It came with a certificate, kid a chart to show
you where it was in the sky.
Speaker 3 (00:13):
They named it after me. It was really great.
Speaker 1 (00:15):
And then it dawned to me that most of the
stars that we see in the sky don't exist anymore.
They burnt out years ago, and we're seeing the light
coming from white years away at us. So basically, last
year my wife got me nothing. She may as well
have gotten me a gift card from Blockbuster Video. I mean,
(00:35):
you know, Amazon said that if I like a star,
well I might also like an echo from the Grand Canyon.
Speaker 4 (00:46):
Our creative director Jim Mudd, who joined the show. Actually
I was going to say earlier this year, but actually
it was in November of last year. We found out
in September that we would be guest hosting for the
Rush Limbaugh Show, but we were asked not to announce
that yet, but we began preparing for the It was
(01:06):
about ten days at Christmas, and so I brought Jim
Mudd on to help us staff up, and it was
kind of a trial run to see if he was
going to be able to keep up, because we produce
a lot and well, i'll leave it at that, not
everyone could keep up, and it turned out he was
such a great addition to the show that he developed
into being our creative director and it's been a big
(01:30):
boon to our show and a lot of times, a
lot of segments we do, he will pull together a
news story and maybe some audio and audio clip to
go with that, or he might write a parody. Chance
McClain makes a lot of our funny songs, but Jim
has also started writing more and more of our parodies.
And whether it's a song that's chosen to go with
(01:51):
a segment or soundclip or parody, he will write a
little background for us as to why he wrote that,
And the background is not meant to be shared on air.
It's not part of the segment. It's just for us
to know why he considered that newsworthy. And a lot
of times I will take what he has written and
I will work.
Speaker 5 (02:11):
That into my own narrative.
Speaker 4 (02:12):
I'll call it my truth. Ramon my truth. Let gonna
start using liberal language. I will speak my truth. I
will find my voice anyway. I'll take what he's written
about something and I'll say, well, that's not accurate, that's
not my perspective. But here, let me make it my perspective.
And he will have been.
Speaker 5 (02:30):
The conversation starter.
Speaker 4 (02:32):
But he wrote a little background for us, and I
liked it so much that I asked him to record
what he had written for y'all to hear from Jim
at Christmas in his own voice, really, ramon, that's what
you seriously.
Speaker 6 (02:52):
As I get older, I find myself reflecting on the
Christmases of my childhood. I look back and I long
for those days. I remember that my parents will let
us open one gift, and that was before we went
to my grandma's house. It was always the Christmas outfit
and new shoes that we would wear to Grandma's and
then later to church, and we would always get excited,
and not because we were happy to get some nice clothes. No,
(03:12):
it was because we knew it was time to get
ready and go to Grandmas soon. Christmas at Grandma's was
the best. Everyone was there, all my aunts, uncles and cousins,
and they would be dressed up too, and they were
happy to see you. Now, my grandma only lived three
blocks away from us, and I used to walk down
there all the time, But on Christmas she may as
well have been across the country because that drive took forever. Now,
(03:33):
Dad would pull up and let Mom out in front
of the house, and I would ride with them to
find a spot to park the car. Now, we had
a big family, so there were a lot of people
there and you had to find a spot down the
street to park. I know now that this was more
than just my dad making me feel like I've grown up,
because you know, he needed help with the presents. Now,
it really was him showing me that my mom was
worth letting out at the door. He didn't want her
to walk all the way down the street and her
(03:55):
good shoes and they were probably new too, and you
know how new shoes can be. We would get the
gifts that we brought for the gift exchange and head
to the house. Now, when we walked through that back door,
everyone agrees with a hug and a Merry Christmas. My
grandma would have the biggest smile on her face, probably
because I was her favorite. It's a fact. Everyone knew it.
Everyone knew that I was the favorite, but a little
(04:16):
bit because it was Christmas. She would give you a
big hug and tell you to go put your coat
in Grandpa's room. Now, Grandma and Grandpa slept in separate
rooms at this point, and if you asked them why
they slept in separate rooms, they would both say that
the other one snored too loud and they couldn't sleep.
Besides the warm welcome, the smell of Grandma's house was amazing.
The smell of food and baked goods, cookies, pies, I
(04:38):
mean it filled the air. My grandma, and I'm sure
like yours was a great cook. Sinatra, Jerry Mathis, Nat
King Cole, Elvis was surely playing on the stereo at
a volume just loud enough to be heard under the
conversation happening throughout the house. Now, as a kid, you're
excited about getting presents. Now that I'm all grown up,
(04:58):
I really can't remember anything that ever got a Grandma's Honestly,
not one thing. Turns out it wasn't as important as
I thought at the time. Now, I do remember one
gift that my grandpa got my grandma. He was so
excited to give it to her. He wrapped it all
by himself, and he waited to the very end of
the gift exchange for her to open it. She was
all smiles opening that box. But let me give you
(05:20):
some background on my grandpa. He was not the romantic type,
not at all.
Speaker 5 (05:24):
Now.
Speaker 6 (05:24):
He loved my grandma, he had or her. He worshiped
the ground she walked on. But he was not the
romantic type, and he wasn't going to get her jewelry
or anything like that. He was practical. He had grown
up on a farm during the Depression and fought the Nazis.
He worked at the gas company for forty years and
fished every weekend. He was very much a function overformed
kind of fellow. So when she opened her present to
find a shiny, brand new fire extinguisher for the house,
(05:48):
she shouldn't have been as surprised as she was. He
was beaming and she was seething. You see, Grandpa thought
that that extinguisher was a sign of just how much
he loved her. He wanted her to be safe if
in a fire broke out, and he took that fire
extinguisher and he mounted it on the wall right outside
her bedroom door. Now, that fire extinguisher outlasted Grandma and
was still hanging on the wall when Grandpa sold the
(06:09):
house fifteen years later. It was a lasting monument of
his love to her. I can never go back and
relive those moments. Those are gone forever. But I still
carry with me the greatest gift that I've ever received
at Grandma's house, the love that was in that house.
That love is what I bring with me as I
make the rounds this Christmas. The love from Grandma's house
is the love that my kids will carry with them
(06:30):
as they get older and have families with their own.
That love has endured longer than any material gift ever
could longer, even than that fire extinguisher.
Speaker 7 (06:41):
I don't have a monkey pox, can't bend over to them,
wear my socks.
Speaker 8 (06:48):
I think Michael Berry.
Speaker 6 (06:50):
Rock, Michael Very's show.
Speaker 2 (07:02):
Oh Holy Night, the stars are rightly shine. It is
the knight of hardy SATs burn.
Speaker 3 (07:23):
Longly, the world.
Speaker 2 (07:27):
Insane and replied.
Speaker 3 (07:32):
Till he honey and soul felt its well.
Speaker 6 (07:43):
A thrill love.
Speaker 2 (07:47):
Lowy reworld rejoice, says before yonder.
Speaker 9 (07:56):
A new one, long.
Speaker 5 (07:59):
Small on.
Speaker 8 (08:04):
On the first day of Kuans my children's asd it
me Mama, what is Kwanza for anyway? On the second
day of kwans to some lady boyther me, I curse
her out, and I say, no, I don't want no
old of meal pictures and quick colin over here.
Speaker 6 (08:21):
On that third day of.
Speaker 8 (08:22):
Kwans I went out to the stove. I need beer
and cigarettes, but they was closed, so I smashed out
the windows, did a drive by and cursed mall hour.
Speaker 6 (08:32):
On the fourth day of.
Speaker 8 (08:33):
Kuan so I turned on the TV Young and the Restless,
all of my children's one day, two lives, and then
oh broh. At four old clock on the fifth day
of Kuan's my check came.
Speaker 10 (08:47):
In the mail a FBC.
Speaker 8 (08:53):
Thank you Lord. I said, come on, kids, let's go
to the stove for some colored greensham hocks and some cheese.
On the sixth day of Quantz, the police rang the bell.
They served a warrant.
Speaker 3 (09:08):
I nearly passed it out, but it was okay.
Speaker 8 (09:13):
Someone money had said I stole her wigs, but I
told them all I would give them back anyway. On
their self day off Kwanza, I voted myself a drink,
A drank, sarted ounces God really full, then lost my mind.
I drove down the street, cursing out everyone I saw.
(09:36):
Then I bashed the katak upside of Dirk Queen. On
the eighth day of Kwanza, I bought a TV guy.
Not much had happened. I was hungover from a bad
headache from schlitzmot liquor. I try to.
Speaker 6 (09:54):
Stay home and be quiet, take my nerve pills. You
can just feel quantsa.
Speaker 3 (10:00):
In the air.
Speaker 8 (10:02):
On the ninth day of kuans that I painted all
my nails two shades of perf for one shade of turquoise.
Stoat on some glitter. Did I'm up real nice?
Speaker 6 (10:12):
I had looked bit good. Then I drove on down two.
Speaker 8 (10:18):
Pop Eyes, bought me some chicken, and I stayed at
home and looked at TV. On the tails day of quans,
the shoplifting was the thing. Ten now or Lady's nine
little candles, eight canser tuna fish, seven little nicknackt, six
pack of Budweiser, five lee press on nails, four pieces
(10:41):
of gum, three large fries. Two days back in jail,
it was Kwan's, Uh, what the hell? On the eleventh
day of Kuans, I got out on me parole.
Speaker 6 (10:53):
I rolled a big Joink went down to the.
Speaker 3 (10:55):
Church and talked all out my head.
Speaker 6 (10:57):
God happen, shouted.
Speaker 8 (10:58):
Passed out on holiday call nine one one, and the
Lord set me free, gave my test a money, steps
on home, didn't even remember where I stayed, and I
woke up real hungry and confused.
Speaker 2 (11:15):
Lloyd.
Speaker 8 (11:16):
On the twelfth day of Quins, my children's gathered around me,
Lincoln and Alvera, Ruganlo Lemangelo and around Gelo ten Acton
and Tim, Tasia, Kim Martina and Filopia, Shadda and Shamika,
von Keisha and Simonella Chlamedia, Champagne, d my Torria, Saska,
(11:41):
Tune Cheito and school Keisha. And it had really started
to feel more like it.
Speaker 11 (11:47):
It was getting near.
Speaker 4 (11:48):
Quin I do love me some Shirley ce lickor romote.
Every time you hear the twelve Days of Quanzo, what
immediately comes to mind? The twelve Days of Christmas. No,
you're lying, then tell me what it's about. Tell me
(12:11):
what it's about. Then I'm gonna look it up real quick.
While I'm looking it up, tell me the gist of
the movie. It's like groundhog Day for some girl reliving
the same date over and over on Christmas Eve. Okay,
let me see what this says. A story that follows Kate,
a young woman who, after a horrible blind date on
(12:34):
Christmas Eve, wakes up to find she is reliving that
same day and date all over again. Okay, I'm sorry
I ever doubted you.
Speaker 5 (12:47):
Well.
Speaker 4 (12:47):
It always makes me think of Chance McLean's Twelve Days
of Christmas Joe Biden version.
Speaker 11 (12:56):
On the first day of Christmas, Joe Biden gave to
me my son Hunters cray on masterpiece. On the second
day of Chris, Miss Joe Biden gave to me two
weeks of shutdowns and his son Hunters gray on masterpiece.
On the third day of Chris, Miss Joe Biden gave
to me boone doggle, two more weeks of shutdowns, and
(13:19):
his son Hunters pray on masterpiece.
Speaker 12 (13:23):
On the fourth day of Chris, Miss.
Speaker 10 (13:25):
Joe Biden gave to me four trillion dollar boon doggle,
two more weeks of shutdowns, and his son's useless pray
on masterpiece. On the fifth day of Chris, Miss Joe Biden.
Speaker 2 (13:37):
Gave to me five come on Man, four.
Speaker 10 (13:43):
Trillion dollar boon doggle, two months of shutdowns and his
son Hunters Gray on Masterpiece.
Speaker 12 (13:50):
On the sixth day of Chris, Miss.
Speaker 10 (13:52):
Joe Biden gave to me six Kamala cackles, five come
on Man, four trillion dollar boon dogle, two more months
of shutdowns, and his son Hunters Gray on Masterpiece. On
the seventh day of Chris, Miss Joe Biden gave to
me seventh wawell, six Kamala.
Speaker 3 (14:14):
Cackles, five come on Man, four.
Speaker 10 (14:19):
Trillion dollar boon, doggle, two more months of shutdowns, and
his son Hunters Gray on Masterpiece.
Speaker 3 (14:26):
On the eighth day of Chris, Miss.
Speaker 10 (14:28):
Joe Biden gave to me eight feds of faking, seven
s wallwell, six Kamala cackles, five come on man, come
four trillion dollar boon doggle, two more months of shutdowns,
and his son Stupid Gray on Masterpiece.
Speaker 13 (14:46):
On the ninth day of Chris, Miss Joe.
Speaker 10 (14:48):
Biden gave to me nine sake circle backs, eight feds
of faking.
Speaker 14 (14:53):
Seven s wawell, six Kamala cackles, cb to come on man,
come f trillion dollar boon doggle, two more months of shutdowns,
and his son Hunters Gray on Masterpiece.
Speaker 10 (15:07):
On the tenth day of Chris, Miss Joe Biden gave
to me ten percent inflation, nine Psaki circle backs, eight
feds of baking, seven Swahwell six, Kamala catles.
Speaker 3 (15:18):
Five, Come on Man, four.
Speaker 10 (15:22):
Trillion dollar boon Doggle, two more months of shutdowns, and
his son Hunters Gray on Masterpiece.
Speaker 15 (15:29):
On the eleventh day of Chris, Miss Joe Biden gave
to me eleven dirty doctors, ten percent inflation, nine Saki
circle backs, eight feds of baking, sevens Wahwell six, Kamala
cackles five, Come on Man.
Speaker 10 (15:46):
Four trillion dollar boon Dogle, two more months of shutdowns,
and his son Hunters Gray on Masterpiece. On the twelfth
day of Chris, Miss Joe Biden gave to me twelve
months of failure, eleven dirty doctors, ten percent inflation, nine
to sack circle backs, eight fence of faking, seven swallow sis, Kamala.
Speaker 16 (16:07):
Cattles five, Come on Man, four trillion dollar boondog a,
two years of shutdowns, and his son Hunters Gray on
master Peace.
Speaker 17 (16:22):
Come on, you said, you said, I'm seriously with his
finger on the pulse. The King of Team continues on
The Michael Berry Show.
Speaker 3 (16:47):
Oh there's no place like Oh.
Speaker 4 (16:53):
The yeared in songs and silliness started off with a bang,
or rather a rip.
Speaker 5 (17:02):
Some of you will remember. I mean, I didn't talk
much about it.
Speaker 4 (17:07):
But a few of you who were close to me
may have heard a very audible rip. The rich the rip,
not the rich. The rip I'm talking about that I
am painfully aware of, Ramon, was the sound of my
calf muscle ripping away from the bone in the tragic
(17:29):
injury in the very dangerous game of pickleball. You can
imagine my surprise when the very day after this tragic event.
By the way, I've won the match, so you can
tell Ray Sinkowitz and Ike clay Pool and Clay Conley
not only did they get their asses whip, but they
got their asses whipped by a guy with a ripped
(17:50):
taff that.
Speaker 5 (17:51):
Had come off the bone.
Speaker 4 (17:52):
The next day, I came into the studio after having
having informed my dear friend Chance McClain, while I'm being
treated for the KLF bustle that has ripped off the bone.
Speaker 5 (18:07):
I'm literally at the.
Speaker 4 (18:09):
Hospital clinic and I come in and without me knowing,
Ramon starts the show because they were in cahoots to
this hateful little diddy. I deserve better than this. I
did rebound, by the way, like a champ. I played
hurt like a man. I still wins.
Speaker 5 (18:29):
Not gonna lie to you. I still wins when I
think about it.
Speaker 4 (18:32):
But they asked that this be in the year in
review of Chance McClain comedy songs, and being the bigger man,
I'm going to allow it. Based on the Beg's hit
song of nineteen seventy six, Tragedy, Here's calf tragedy.
Speaker 5 (19:26):
All right, enough of that nonsense.
Speaker 4 (19:28):
Next up, we moved from the disco of the seventies
into a parody of a song that belongs on.
Speaker 5 (19:34):
The mount Rushmore of eighties pop.
Speaker 4 (19:38):
You got beat it, Come on, Eileen, take on Me,
and this one from the Breakfast Club Don't You Forget
About Me? From Simple Minds. I like it because it
was a particular song from a particular movie that I
happened to like from the eighties little off brand, but
I liked it. With a song this iconic and a
president this moronic, of course, he came up with Biden
(20:01):
Forgets Everything as a parody on Don't You Forget About Me?
As a president Joe Biden leaves a lot to be
desired as an order. The man is an unmitigated disaster.
It's not just a foot and mouth disease and mumble mouthing,
it's everything. He forgets everything. Your president said all of that,
(20:27):
and we made it into a song.
Speaker 18 (20:31):
By the same.
Speaker 3 (20:48):
George boyd is.
Speaker 19 (20:56):
Corn was corn was.
Speaker 20 (21:00):
A bad bade Obamba started. You're mad lion, Dolphace money soldier,
you win back an you ain't black and look look.
Speaker 17 (21:22):
Fast weak o. So scre.
Speaker 3 (21:40):
Bye boy gets everything.
Speaker 17 (21:46):
Bye bye, good bye, and mind by.
Speaker 3 (21:52):
Boy gets everything. Pass the taste go.
Speaker 5 (22:06):
Let's bring it in a little closer to home on
the next one.
Speaker 4 (22:08):
From the White House in DC, all the way to
Montgomery County, where a certain congressman I regrettably helped get elected,
decided to get in a pissing match with an eighteen
year old young woman at a Republican county meeting. If
you recall, Dan Crenshaw was pontificating and the concept of
faith came up, not the George Michaels, but actual faith
(22:31):
in a higher power. Crenshaw snapped at the young lady,
and we snapped at the opportunity to clown the establishment,
Republican John McCain wannabe. Don't question Dan Crenshaw's faith. Don't
you dare peasant constituent, don't.
Speaker 20 (22:48):
Do it.
Speaker 18 (22:54):
Nice, blastizing, contorts, chop bolt of insa.
Speaker 3 (23:00):
I like to swap He's now. I've only been home twice.
Speaker 10 (23:05):
Once was a photo opportunity, then a Montgomery County Q
today that didn't go so well.
Speaker 3 (23:13):
There was a bright young lady who had.
Speaker 21 (23:17):
A problem with one of my awesome.
Speaker 3 (23:21):
Verba don't quotes where she acted like a.
Speaker 22 (23:25):
Baby who needs a bob.
Speaker 21 (23:29):
I dress said to old girl down, and I told
her she should know not to question my face.
Speaker 3 (23:36):
Don't't question my face. I want to question of my
faith to face the face. Don't watch in my.
Speaker 18 (23:42):
Faith to faith to face every We used to be
best to charms.
Speaker 3 (23:48):
We drank bourbon, had some fun. We were two peas
in a pod.
Speaker 18 (23:53):
Every thing he said about Greg Abby was unbared.
Speaker 3 (24:00):
He madded was a lightning rod.
Speaker 22 (24:03):
And so I made a story advertizing.
Speaker 18 (24:09):
I tried to faint my boy in a man life question.
Speaker 15 (24:14):
I said, I am the test through my side.
Speaker 3 (24:19):
But he read them on the air in the medicine
how I lost the fight, didn't ques.
Speaker 10 (24:26):
Didn't question my face, question my faith, the faith, don't
qush my faith.
Speaker 17 (24:34):
You're listening to.
Speaker 5 (24:35):
The Michael Berry's show.
Speaker 2 (24:47):
Melcha is a thing to say.
Speaker 5 (24:52):
One of the.
Speaker 4 (24:53):
Big stories and one of our favorite stories, and it
fits in with this theme of people pushing back, people
fighting back, common people, not famous people, not wealthy people,
people risking it all their livelihood, in some cases their lives,
but certainly their livelihood. And the Freedom Convoy. Who would
(25:15):
have thought that Canadian truckers would steal our hearts? Those
fellows were protested the COVID vaccine and we couldn't have
been prouder.
Speaker 5 (25:26):
So Chance went all c W. McCall with a song
called Freedom Convoy.
Speaker 9 (25:30):
The small fringe minority of people who are on their
way to Ottawa or who are holding unacceptable views that
they're expressing do not represent the views of Canadians who
have been there for each other break.
Speaker 12 (25:51):
Or break of one to nine. This year's the Free Canuck.
You got a copy on me, pig pick, Come on,
Oh yeah, for sure, for sure, my golly is clean
clear to Ottawa. Come on, yeah, that's a big ten
four there, pig pen. Yeah, we definitely got the front
door good buddy, Mercy sakes alive. Looks like we got
ourselves a freedom convoy.
Speaker 13 (26:14):
For two years now, every government around been closing in
on US mandates, vaccine, shutting down schools. We finally had enough,
and you never know where and you never know how
resistance will spring forth Southwest airlines, pissed off moms or
truckers way up north.
Speaker 19 (26:32):
Freedom con by tonight we got freedom cod.
Speaker 3 (26:40):
Come on Joy, do con.
Speaker 10 (26:44):
We got con.
Speaker 12 (26:49):
Come breaker. This here's knuck rumor? Has it beginness? Book
of World Records is on the horn. They're saying this
already a record. We ain't even started yet.
Speaker 3 (27:01):
Come back.
Speaker 13 (27:02):
Fifty miles of big rigs and one hundred more of cars,
pickup trucks and SUVs cheering on the stars.
Speaker 3 (27:10):
Trudeau tries to downplay it.
Speaker 13 (27:12):
The media ignore good luck black holing ten million tons
of thunder at your door.
Speaker 19 (27:20):
Freedom Convoy the nights, Freedom Conutiful site, Come on Joy,
Canada cone.
Speaker 17 (27:37):
On a Winnipeg street A convoy of trucks and other
vehicles protest vaccine mandates.
Speaker 11 (27:43):
Ottawa police are preparing for truckers and supporters from across
Canada descending on the nation's capital.
Speaker 6 (27:49):
Saturday.
Speaker 13 (27:49):
Sure this is happening way up north in America's cold hat.
But there are red blooded patriots in them rigs, and
you can be sure of that they salute the flag.
Speaker 12 (27:59):
Love, Mom and Dad, never quit and never forget love,
guns and God and bubby dogs ain't having.
Speaker 3 (28:05):
A great reset. So when you see a big rig.
Speaker 23 (28:07):
On the road, go The driver in that calv probably
ain't sipping a Chai latte, and he don't vote Democrat.
Let this be your example if you were rating on
a sign to take our country.
Speaker 14 (28:20):
Back by God, right now is the time, Because Cony.
Speaker 3 (28:29):
Coy in common.
Speaker 4 (28:49):
Another story that still exists is of the busting of
illegals all across the country. Some things haven't changed. I
think this is one of our best songs, not just
in regards to lyrics, but his phrasing was so good.
Speaker 5 (29:04):
I hope you are thanks for.
Speaker 3 (29:07):
The ride on the spose. I got onto it because.
Speaker 7 (29:15):
I crossed the reel ground looking for the promised land.
Speaker 3 (29:23):
This is a very nice pause. I like how my
blue seedar choice.
Speaker 7 (29:30):
The air conditioner works very well. Back at Homies hot
as hell? Where are we going on this spouse? The
bathroom in the back discuss I've been on it for
a long long time. That was the Arkansas state line.
(29:55):
I think I live in On this bus, there are
like eighty.
Speaker 3 (30:00):
Five of us. I've been riding four life fourteen days.
Speaker 7 (30:07):
Am I still in the USA? Why didn't they stop?
Dispose that bus driver ride.
Speaker 3 (30:17):
On for us? He said it out or they ors me.
We'll go on to Washington, d C. Washington, DC, My
new home is in DC. Take me back to Mexico
co cit.
Speaker 5 (30:40):
Remember monkey pox.
Speaker 4 (30:42):
Oh, you were supposed to be very scared, and they
wanted you to believe that anybody could get monkey pox,
whether you were engaged in butt secks or not. But
finally people realized, no, if I'm not having butt sex,
I don't really have anything to worry about nasty looking
(31:02):
blisters all over the place. It was supposed to be
the next COVID, except it was for gay dudes, and
it only affected gay dudes. And if gay dudes didn't
have gay sex, they didn't get monkey pocks. But that
didn't stop the government from trying to push it on
us as another way to control us. Well, chance came
(31:25):
up with and I'm not proud of this, but if
we don't laugh, We'll have to cry, monkey pocks blisters
in the sun.
Speaker 20 (31:48):
Went to a party.
Speaker 22 (31:49):
I got drunk, passed out on the floor.
Speaker 10 (31:52):
It was full of dudes.
Speaker 22 (31:54):
They got nude and woke up sick and sword monkey
barss gym blisters on my butt, monkey bars, gay orgies
are no funs.
Speaker 10 (32:09):
All my lesions, day, my sheets, and I looked like
got the fly.
Speaker 18 (32:14):
I am a leper, skin is Pepper with her piece
Simplex nine, monkey bars, gay mae blisters on my face,
monkey bars, gay orgies are not saved.
Speaker 3 (32:35):
Went to a party.
Speaker 21 (32:36):
I got drunk, passed out on the floor. It was
full of dudes. They got nude. I woke up, silk
and sword my lesion, stay my sheets, I look like
god fly. I am a leper, skinness Pepper with her pie, Simplex.
Speaker 18 (32:54):
Nine, monkey bars and gay me blisters on my butt,
mumpy bos.
Speaker 3 (33:02):
Gay orgies are no funs.
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