July 16, 2025 • 33 mins
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Speaker 1 (00:00):
I'm a Jeopardy nut, absolute nut, and when Alex and
now Ken Jennings, I hate Ken Jennings politics, I hate him.
But Ken Jennings is an amazing host of Jeopardy. And
you have to understand for me to say that, I
never wanted to say that Ken Jennings does a phenomenal judge.
(00:20):
There's only one Alex Trebek. You can't criticize a guy
because he's not Alex Trebek. You know, people will tell
me that that that Klay and Buck are not rush Limbaugh.
They know that somebody had to do the show, and
no matter who you are, you're not Rush Limbaugh. And
they're not saying they are. So it was. It was.
(00:43):
It's always interesting to me when they come back after
a break and the judges have conferred and they announced that,
oh no, no, you did get the answer correct or
the other one is are you know the the analytics
team has done the research and this is the first
time and so our analytics team has done the research.
(01:04):
Ramon has been consulted in San Diego where he is.
Jim has led the investigation. Chad is in Hawaii working
on the back porch of a beautiful Lenai everyone agrees.
This is the first intro to a segment that Kunda
both created, the segment idea and the intro music for
(01:26):
the Bad Name Game. I think he's got a relative
with a bad name. And here we go, Colley, bad name, ladys.
It's America's favorite game of shame.
Speaker 2 (01:37):
You married a prince with a last name full of stitch.
Speaker 3 (01:42):
Bad name shame game.
Speaker 1 (01:53):
All right, to the phone lines we go. It's the
bad name shame game. But it could also be someone
with a fancy name like Langston, Willcox Turner. Greg, you're
on the Michael Berry Show. Let me try these gim
Let's see if I can get on. If I can
get there, we go. Go ahead, Greg, you're okay?
Speaker 4 (02:12):
All right, I'm not okay. Well, I had a guy
I worked for named Sass and so I can just
imagine his girlfriends telling her girlfriends and last night I
had a date and night kissed Bill's ass.
Speaker 1 (02:29):
See, that's the kind of stupid stuff. The first time
I hear that someone's last name is zas that I
think up And I can't say most of them, because
you know, it's not a political correctness. I end up
hurting a lot of people's feelings because I think I'm funny,
and sometimes it's not. It's you know, the person is
sensitive and the rest of the people in the group
think I'm an ass. Pete, you're on the Michael Berry Show.
(02:52):
What's yours?
Speaker 2 (02:54):
Hey, Michael.
Speaker 5 (02:55):
I worked in customer service for twenty years, and undoubtedly
when a woman will walk up and I would say hi, there,
what's your name? And they would say Rebecca Cox Cox,
they always had to spell it. They always had to
make sure you knew it was Cox.
Speaker 1 (03:12):
Yeah.
Speaker 5 (03:13):
I mean, if if I ran into two hundred people
like that, it was two hundred for two hundred, which.
Speaker 1 (03:18):
It was crazy. Can you imagine how awful that was
with them? Where did you work?
Speaker 5 (03:27):
I worked for a automotive repair shop here in the
Houston area. It's a it's a big franchise.
Speaker 1 (03:37):
Okay, fair enough. Do you still work there?
Speaker 6 (03:39):
Yeah?
Speaker 5 (03:40):
Uh no, I'm retired. Retired twenty years government, twenty years with.
Speaker 1 (03:44):
Them, right on. And were you a mechanic?
Speaker 7 (03:50):
No, I was.
Speaker 5 (03:51):
I was a management type thing.
Speaker 1 (03:53):
I kind of Oh, sorry, I cut it too early,
My bad. Oh, Jim, what does it have to do
whether they were black or not? John, You're up? Go ahead?
Speaker 7 (04:07):
Yes, custy Western legend Pasty Kline. Her second husband name
was Charlie Dick.
Speaker 1 (04:20):
Is that who she was married to when she died?
Speaker 8 (04:24):
Yes?
Speaker 7 (04:24):
Yes, and he's still alive today.
Speaker 1 (04:29):
I don't know that I knew that. I don't know
that I knew that. Christine. You're on the Michael Berry Show.
What's yours?
Speaker 6 (04:38):
Hi, Michael? So I'm just passing us coins right now
on itn C If I see Kenny Duncan, I'm as
trainer anyway.
Speaker 1 (04:46):
Oh yeah, I hear about you.
Speaker 6 (04:49):
Yeah, yeah, he's in great shape. Several decades ago, I
was in pharmacy school at u of H College of Pharmacy,
and I had a couple of kids in my class
that we would sit up in the front of the class,
and one of them's name was Lena Wong. And then
the guy that sat behind us, name was Robin Watt,
(05:12):
and he would always kid Lena because he was so
studious and he was barely scraping by. And he told
her one day, you know what, Lena, after we graduate
and we become pharmacists, we're going to open a pharmacy
and we're gonna call it what long Pharmacies. I just
don't remember that after all.
Speaker 1 (05:30):
These years Asian names are. She was so much fun
because you get you know, the hung lows and all those.
But I grew up in Orangefield, which was a high
school I went to, had a large Vietnamese population, and
they had everyone in the community worked either in shrimping
(05:54):
or in a nursery. They had a big plant nursery there,
and as is common, most of their last name was Win.
And I was a kid with no filter, and I
created every win joke. You can imagine. If you were
to ask my classmates, my high school classmates, who some
(06:15):
of whom I still keep up with tweet win twe
would say how many? He said, how many win jokes
did Michael Berry have when y'all are in high school?
She'd say, have to be one hundred, And that's not
an exaggeration. I would say. You know, the kids would
named who what, when, who when and what when they
lived in a Winnebago. They were all these sorts of jokes.
(06:37):
But I will tell you, as a group, by far
as an immigrant group after Indians, the most successful Indian
group ever. And I don't say that to cover my
tracks because I have so many good wind jokes I
say that because I've always been in deep admiration of
(07:00):
Vietnamese Americans. But at some point when I've had a
couple of drinks, so some of my Vietnamese friends from
from school will remind me of the jokes I came
up with that I didn't remember of varying quality. But
that's what you're supposed to do when you're young. You're
supposed to make you're supposed to I had to live
through the Michael Row Your Boat Ashore, which I thought
(07:23):
was the stupidest. I mean, that's lame, that's not even
that's not even funny. Or give it to Mikey. He'll
like it. He likes everything. Okay, well us, I mean
you're not even creative now, Barry. Yeah, you can imagine
with guys in a locker room. What what? What kind
of stuff? I heard on that?
Speaker 9 (07:42):
All right?
Speaker 1 (07:43):
Seven one three nine nine nine one thousand. Your highly pretentious,
precocious names are really really bad names coming up.
Speaker 10 (07:55):
You are listening to Michael Barry's Shaw night.
Speaker 1 (08:01):
I worked for Bdo Sideman and we had an accountant
named how Duke Doe. Doe actually rhymes with so although
it's spelled do. When he submitted his resume, the HR
director read howdy do do? Rhyming with two and thought
it was a fake resume phonetically how do you do?
(08:25):
He applied three times before he got hired. He was
awesome and our go to it guy, in addition to
being one of the best accountants at the firm. And
there you have it. I'm going to have to get
through some of these emails because some of them are
just they're just too good, not too Let's start with Ruth.
You're up, sweetheart, Go.
Speaker 10 (08:46):
Ahead, Michael. I worked in the staffing and placement industry
for thirty four years and we ran into a lot
of entertaining names. Our top four were Mercedes Speed, Princess
High Tower okay, and the last two, which are slightly inappropriate,
(09:09):
are Anita Dick and our top favorite, Rhoda Glasscock.
Speaker 1 (09:17):
You know them. The name Glasscock is not so uncommon.
I will hear it mentioned or see it written. And
I've always thought that's an interesting name to go through
through life with, especially a lot of old English names.
They're they're they're pretty interesting. How old are you writ
Ruth sixty sixty. You may be the youngest Ruth ever met.
Speaker 10 (09:45):
You don't run into many outside of a nursing home.
Speaker 8 (09:48):
No.
Speaker 1 (09:49):
My grandmother was named Ruth Barry and she passed at
ninety nine, just short of one hundred. Oh shoot, my
dad's eighty five. I bet you that's been ten years ago,
so she'd be one hundred and ten. So she's got
fifty years on you. But you just don't. That's not true.
I had a college classmate named Ruth what was her
(10:12):
last name? But you just don't. You don't hear Ruth
one of those names. It just kind of went away. Mark,
you're on the Michael Berry Show.
Speaker 11 (10:18):
Go ahead, yeah, Mark, Michael. Our daughter, her name is
was Skyler man Amn. She married a gentleman with the
last name Hacker, and I asked her she should hyphenate
her name because she's a nurse at a urologist, and
it would be She's.
Speaker 1 (10:39):
I love it.
Speaker 11 (10:40):
And my brother in Austin went to the top eurologist
for vasectomy that you can look us up. His name
is doctor Richard Chopp.
Speaker 5 (10:50):
Look it up.
Speaker 1 (10:51):
Oh, I love that. Hey, Jim, make sure they're not
on speakerphone or bluetooth. Just remind them when you when
you pick it up, because I get I can hardly
hear them. When you do, Mike, you're up. Go ahead.
Speaker 9 (11:03):
Hey, it's kind of hard to follow, Ruis. Those are
some good ones. But I'm sure you've heard of the
millionaire over here in San Antonio, that it was named
Dick Tips.
Speaker 1 (11:12):
No, well, no, I have not. What's he famous for?
Speaker 9 (11:16):
He owned some cemeteries. He owns a couple. Well, I'm
sure he's got his hands and everything, but he owns
a couple of cemeteries. You're in San Antonio, I'm sure
with some other stuff.
Speaker 1 (11:25):
Well, I've always thought that HB would be named after
the last name of the owner, but for the fact
that it was Butt and Uh. I had a law
school classmate named named Eric Haidu. Eric is a lawyer
in Austin these days. And Eric had come down from
Indiana and he'd gone to the University of Indiana. He
(11:48):
was the biggest Bobby Knight fan you'll ever meet. And
he the first day we're all hanging out, and he said, y'all,
I've got a grocery store. It must be Jewish because
it's called Hebe. And he thought that was the funniest thing,
like that was some short form of Hebrew. Well, I
(12:11):
didn't know chib. I don't think i'd ever seen an chib.
This was nineteen ninety three, but we had classmates that
were from parts of Texas that had an HIB and
they said, no, you goof, it's Howard E. Butt. And
then he really busts out laughing and he says, so
it's not heb it's Howard E.
Speaker 7 (12:31):
Butt.
Speaker 1 (12:32):
And they said yes. And for weeks to this day,
I still kid him about. You know, this was his
introduction coming down to Texas to a grocery store and
all the humor it gave him. Craig, you're on the
Michael Berry Show. Go ahead, sir.
Speaker 12 (12:49):
What's up, Michael?
Speaker 1 (12:50):
How you doing good?
Speaker 3 (12:52):
You got me?
Speaker 2 (12:53):
I'll went to high school.
Speaker 12 (12:54):
With a girl named Bunnie Bell, and we went to
see Eddie Rabbit. After the show. We met him and
she said, Eddie, my name is Bunny Bell, and if
you marry me, my name will be Bunny Rabbit.
Speaker 13 (13:06):
That's right.
Speaker 1 (13:09):
I didn't see that coming. I like his particular storytelling style. Colleen,
you're on the Michael Berry Show.
Speaker 14 (13:16):
Go ahead, sweetheart, Hi Michael, good morning. My last name
is Has and it's spelled h A s. Everybody always
gets it wrong. And I real quickly say, hey, don't
make an ass out of Hoss, because a lot of
people go, h A S S.
Speaker 1 (13:36):
Are you really my ownership?
Speaker 14 (13:40):
No, I am not. So we're on our own out
here where is out here? And Montgomery? Oh okay, and
we live up to Montgomery.
Speaker 1 (13:53):
I met Fred, he said, Hass, But I don't know
if that was because it was easier as a retail
named Fred Hass, Toyota and all of those. And I
think Jay, his son, took over. So I don't know
what became of all that, but I think it was
Fred Hass who had started in Orange. And so I
(14:14):
was at Formula one or one of the race car
deals they had in downtown Houston, and he was sitting
in front of me, and I had been invited as
his guest, but I didn't know I was his guest.
I was invited by someone else, but it was his tickets.
And so he sat down right in front of me
and he says, nice to meet you, and big fan,
thank you. And I have an Orange, Texas connection. I said, okay,
(14:37):
well at least he knows I'm from Orange. Okay, what
is that? And he said, I started my first business
in Orange, I had the CON's Appliance Store. I believe
it was Consaplance store, and I think it was Fred Has.
It was one of the car news but I think
it was Fred Hass. But he pronounced it Hass instead
of Has, although I've heard it pronounced both ways. Scott,
(14:59):
You're go ahead.
Speaker 3 (15:03):
Hey, Michael. Uh. Back in the seventies, when I was
working in Houston here, I worked as a fella in.
His uh given name was Flint Sparks and he was
from Kentucky hillbilly from Kentucky.
Speaker 1 (15:17):
Flint Sparks. You got to think that his parents had
a sense of humor, right, because that doesn't First of all,
Flint's not a regular name. I mean, that's somebody that's
making a memorable name. Delinda, you're up, sweetheart. Go ahead, hey, Michael.
Speaker 15 (15:32):
I have a neighbor.
Speaker 9 (15:33):
Her name is Hailey Raper R A P. E. R.
Speaker 15 (15:37):
And she married a gentleman.
Speaker 1 (15:38):
His last name is Gay Raper Gay Hale Gay out
of the frying pan into the fire right there. I mean,
she's just that poor woman is that's Let's go to
Julie real quick. Julie, Oh sorry, can you get it
in Julie, go ahead, allow me to introduce myself.
Speaker 8 (15:58):
My name is Mitt.
Speaker 1 (15:59):
We'll come Michael Genius. Well, today we have several meetings
with heads of state on the schedule for today, we're
talking about bad names you marry into or out of,
or that you knew, and how someone handled it. I mean,
the only way to handle it is is to make
(16:22):
it a joke. It's part of your identity. Some people
change their names because I look back now to how
nervous kids are. We had a classmate he passed in
his forties, much too soon. His name was Craig Hobbs.
Everybody loved Craig, and Craig's legal name was Dustin. So
(16:43):
I guess when his mother would sign him up. Every year,
she would sign him up under his legal name. Although
back then it wasn't like today you could make up
any name. Nobody cross referenced anything. You didn't have a
database where you could look and see he could have
been Joe Smith. So every year, on the first day,
when the teacher would call out the names, we'd start
(17:03):
getting to h and all of the guys. We ran
around together a group of us, Toby Schultz, Ben Wernig,
Craig Hobbs, Stephen Bradley. You know, there was a there
was a whole group of us from from elementary all
the way up, and I can remember, especially in elementary school,
let's say third grade, where little boys are trying to
be real tough, especially around the other little boys, and
(17:25):
we'd get we'd start going through and we'd go to B, C, D, E,
F G, and we'd all be a twitter, like we
couldn't wait because I bet it was gonna be Dustin Hobbes.
And the teacher would say, as she would go to
say Dustin Hobbes, he'd say, it's Craig, and we would
all go, Craig, don't interrupt, yes, ma'am, could he what's
(17:47):
the name? And they'd say what, she'd say what? She
wouldn't know, And we already knew we'd been doing this
a couple of years now. We knew the whole drill.
And he was so embarrassed of the name Dustin being
his legal name. Probably name for Dustin Hoffman, I don't know,
but you think about this, yeah, because we were born
in seventy and what was the graduate sixty nine? I
(18:09):
bet you that's who he was named for. But it's
not like Dustin was a bad name. But at that age,
for whatever reason, it was a bad name because it
wasn't his name. His name was Craig with a K,
K R E G, and we would jokingly call him
Dustin for the entirety of our school time. And it's
so silly now, but at that time, for some reason,
(18:30):
that was really embarrassing. You look back now and it's
just funny. Janice, you're on the Michael Berry Show. Go aheads.
Speaker 11 (18:36):
We heard.
Speaker 12 (18:38):
Hi.
Speaker 11 (18:38):
Yes, my main name was bald b A L L.
Speaker 3 (18:41):
And I'm married the guy with the last name.
Speaker 1 (18:44):
Oh, well, there you go. Do you hyphenate your last name?
Speaker 16 (18:49):
No, I don't even use that name anymore.
Speaker 1 (18:53):
We move on. You know, it's crazy because women go
by different names in the course of their lives. Most
of us don't. I've been Michael Berry since you know,
I can remember, and that's just kind of who I am.
I can't imagine my wife went from nonea the Vencatationwitin
to Nandida Berry. It's like a whole new identity and
(19:16):
women do it every day. It's crazy think about it.
Of course, they wear high heels too, and I can't imagine.
That's the whole thing about men cross dressed, and I
ever understood they got the short end of the stick. Literally,
we got the good one. We get to go straight
into the bathroom. We don't have to wear a makeup,
We don't have to do our hair. We can roll
(19:38):
out of bed, run a comb across our head, and
go out in public. We don't have to wear makeup.
Why would anybody? Nobody thinks to themselves, man being a
dude is such a drag. I want to live a
woman's life. That's insane. Why would you do that? Anyway? Champ,
you're up.
Speaker 8 (20:01):
Our accountant had a wonderful secretary with the great sense
of humor. And her last name was Pittsworth.
Speaker 1 (20:10):
Oh okay, was she cute?
Speaker 8 (20:15):
Yes? She was very pretty.
Speaker 1 (20:18):
Is Champ your Christian name your given name or is
it a nickname? No, that's my real name, and it's
just Champ, not Champion.
Speaker 8 (20:27):
No, it's just Champ. And that's my oldest son's name too.
Speaker 1 (20:32):
Okay, Well there you go. I like that interesting. Charlie.
You're on the Michael Berry Show. What you got, sir? Yeah?
Speaker 17 (20:41):
When I was ten or eleven, when I had a
friend his name was Peter Bender. And then when I
got a little older, I had another friend. His name
was His name was Kevin bus and he always told
me that if you ever had a boy, he was
going name Harry Harry Buds.
Speaker 1 (20:57):
Well, there you go, let's go to Roberts Robert. You're
only Michael Barry show.
Speaker 3 (21:03):
Go ahead, Hey, Michael, I was.
Speaker 15 (21:07):
I grew up in Indiana. I went to high school
and there was a girl, probably a couple of years
in front of me. Her first name was Candy, Candy Lawrence,
beautiful girl, corn corn bread. And right after she graduated
she was gonna get married. And I was crushed, you know,
because I thought I had a chance, right, But she
must have really loved the guy because his name was
Jeff Peters. So her name was Candy Peters.
Speaker 1 (21:31):
Well, it's not the worst one we've heard today. Reminder, folks,
please don't be on speakerphone or bluetooth. I know you
have to wait for a minute, but we can't hear
you when you're on the line. Randy. Go ahead.
Speaker 11 (21:44):
Yeah.
Speaker 16 (21:44):
So it was in the late eighties and we were
at the Houston Rodeo and we're about eight nine years
old than me and my cousin are just little Hellion
and we're running around and my aunt yell Randy Travit
get over here. And we were there to see Randy
Travis and everybody turns around. He looks at her like
it looks at us like we're Randy Travis running around
(22:06):
be a bunch of heathens.
Speaker 1 (22:07):
Yeah, or Hellion's which you first said, which is one
of my favorite words. And you've ever been around little
boys running around together, Helen's is a perfect word, Scott,
you and to Michael Berry show go ahead.
Speaker 3 (22:20):
Yeah. When I was an elementary school in the sixties,
my teachers wouldn't let me use my middle name, and
my first name is Dale. So these kids come up
to me and they call me Dale Evans. And the
way I handled that, I just tell him they could
kiss my last.
Speaker 1 (22:41):
You know what's funny about that, Scott, is probably ninety
percent of our audience has no idea who Dale Evans is,
But when you were I do. But when you were
a kid, I guess some of our older folks would.
I would be interesting to know what the age cutoff
is for people who would know who Dale Evans is. Lisa,
You're own to Michael Berry, show go ahead.
Speaker 11 (23:04):
Hi, Michael, thank you for having me on the show.
Speaker 14 (23:06):
I went from Newberry to Barry when I got married.
Speaker 1 (23:10):
Oh, there you go. That's not a big change. That's
not a big change. But you know, I'm fascinated by
this concept that we take for granted that women just
changed their name. That's part of getting married. And you
know that the modern woman, which was began in the seventies.
This was Hillary Rodham who didn't take Bill Clinton's name.
Didn't do that because somehow that was subjugating yourself. But
(23:33):
she sure did when she ran when he started running
for president, didn't she. Chris, you own to Michael Berry,
show go ahead.
Speaker 2 (23:40):
Yeah.
Speaker 13 (23:41):
Back in high school, my freshman year eighty three at
Conra High School, we had to go get our pictures
taken for the yearbook. And I don't know if it
was the guy himself or somebody did it for him,
but you have to fill out a card to associate
your picture with the name. And anyway, he put down
Jack and then the last name M.
Speaker 7 (24:02):
E O F F.
Speaker 13 (24:03):
And it wound up in the yearbook. It didn't uh,
it didn't get cut out. You know.
Speaker 1 (24:09):
That's one of those that you see on social media
sites for the little clip where you know they'll go
up and ask, you know, could you call for so
and so to meet me at the at the customer
service desk and in this week little old lady, and
she has no idea and she reads it. That's one
of the names that's always that's always read off you.
(24:29):
You probably never have fun again like you did in
high school over the what kind of stuff can we
get in the high school yearbook? Well, that's the kind
of thing that when you're at that age you could
laugh for the game everything. Joe Wright, I am reminded
of the incredibly bad name of Houston's own I'm a Hog.
(24:50):
Her parents were quite cruel. Also, I had a proctologist,
now retired, named doctor Butts. What a perfect name for
a proctologist. Anytime I mentioned I'm a hog, my mentor
Walter Zivily. His mother, Jane Bieler Zively, was the personal
(25:11):
assistant to I'm a Hog and ran her office for
many many years. I mean maybe fifty years, I don't know,
some high number of years. And folks every time I
mentioned I'm a hog will say, you know, she has
a sister named Eura. No, she did not have a
(25:33):
sister named Era. That's the joke. She also didn't have
a sister named Husa, which is another one. She did
have a father who was governor of Texas, and he
would campaign claiming and he would rattle off a series
of hog names. But it was not. It was not
(25:54):
as many people believe. It's one of those things that
if you've heard it enough times, you might actually start
to believe it. Delenda says, I have more bad names
I've run across. I went to school with Dusty Weathers
and his sister is Wendy and brother Stormy Katie High School.
At Katie Junior High, I had a friend named Penny Nichols.
Her dad called her sixth sense. My married last name
(26:15):
is McPhail. I guess it's better than my maiden name.
No whack. Kyle writes. There was a lady named Julia
Sullivan who was about to marry Glenn Gully, and her
name would be Julia Gully, but Julia Gully, but her
wedding singer, dude Robert Hart, broke that marriage up before
the wedding. Oh my, there's the story. What's that? Oh
(26:41):
that's the move from the movie The wedding singer Okay.
I hadn't seen that. Okay had some good friends that
got married, Ryan Stiff and Melanie Cram. It was the
Stiff Cram wedding. Keith writes. In the military, I met
a young lady who had enlisted in the Navy. Lower
enlisted personnel in the Navy are called by their rank
of seamen, then her last name. This young lady's last
(27:03):
name was Swallow, so she always addressed herself as Seaman Swallow.
I would have joined a different branch of service if
I was her. Harry writes, Our secretary treasurer at AFM
in Nashville is named Will Barrow. I think it's Harry Wilkinson.
I think he's dead. Series Rogers says, great music, except
(27:24):
maybe for the last Beatles song Let's See. Jonathan says,
in the earlier eighties, my family went to visit our
relatives in New Jersey. While having dinner, they were talking
about a cousin out there named Roseanne who was going
to marry a man with the last name Dana. Due
to Saturday Night Live, there were a lot of jokes
going on about her Rosanna and Rosanna Dana was such
(27:45):
a great character on those early seasons. My wife's uncle's
last name is Carol, and he married a woman named Carol.
You know, we had a couple. He was a deacon
and she was a leader amongst the ladies at Old
First Orn Baptist Church. Beloved couple. And his name was
(28:05):
Archie Jones. And when she married him, her name Archie
became Archie Jones. And so when somebody was referencing them,
which you did often, it would be Archie boy and
Archie girl. And I've known of other couples where they
were Tracy's or Kelly's and they get married. Let's see here,
Kimberly says. My next door neighbor's given name was Candy Box.
(28:28):
My brother had a high school friend last named Mountain.
The kid's names were Cliff, Rocky, Smokey, and Candy. My favorite.
A customer at the bank was Middle Eastern. He was
a sheikh named Ma Boob my Boob. I had a
friend named Dick, Tip says Triumph. One't year, on the
first day of school, the teacher was calling names and
(28:49):
she said she was going to change his name to Rick.
He responded, no, thanks, I've always been Dick, and I
will always be Dick. He would introduce himself as Dick Tip.
The person would repeat the name, and he'd respond, Yep,
that's me, always on point. You know, the fact is,
if you're gonna have a funny name, you better just.
Speaker 13 (29:09):
Is.
Speaker 1 (29:10):
You better just embrace it. There's just no way around that.
Gay Adams was gay. Snowball owns Pooky's Cafe in Beadias, Texas.
Josh writes, Hey, Michael, the subject of last names, find
my father before me and my daughter have heard the
same joke. You ought to do that, and I do
believe you have used this on your show. The most
(29:31):
interesting combination name I've seen has been a lady running
for some type of office. Her name was Robin Rape,
rob oh Rob Robin Rape for Rob n Rape. Okay,
that's like Dewey Cheataman. How there used to be a
Brazoria County official with a name Jackie Moff. That'd be
(29:53):
interesting to know. Jason writes, Goodyear, I was one of
the guys business cards, Scott Dumbcomb, poor fella. I asked
the chick I was dating at the time if she
would date me if I had that last name. She
said no. I dodged that bullet with her anyway, So
I guess he didn't end up marrying that girl. Kenneth writes.
(30:14):
When I was in the Air Force, I was a
medic and there were two doctors, a urologist named doctor
Clapp and another named doctor Bill's. Well, that's an interesting
group of folks there. Let's go to Philip, Philip, you're
old Michael Berry Show. What's yours?
Speaker 6 (30:30):
Man?
Speaker 9 (30:30):
I got a buddy of mine is dad's a psychiatrist
and his name is doctor Looney.
Speaker 1 (30:37):
It's awesome. It's almost as if people gravitate toward a
career like that when they have a funny name, like
wouldn't it be funny or ironic? And maybe subconsciously they do.
I don't know, but it does seem to happen a lot. Rick,
You're on the Michael Berry Show. Go ahead, yo.
Speaker 11 (30:55):
Michael was working as a maintenance man and I went
to work on a unit in the lady's name was
Douanna do wanna dick?
Speaker 1 (31:03):
Oh my goodness, Dan Pastorina Pastrina told me that that
that Anita Martin, that Anita Martini's name was really Anita Martini.
I want to say. He told me that was the case.
I don't know if that's true, but I believe he
said that. You never know with him because he kind
(31:24):
of says things and then you ask if he's telling
the truth. Then he kind of sort of gives you
a ry smile, so you gotta check, you gotta fact
check everything. Not that he would lie, but that he'd
make a fool out of you by getting you to
go off and say that, and then it wouldn't be true.
Don You're up. What you got? Don has nothing? Don
has absolutely nothing? Rick, what you got?
Speaker 2 (31:48):
Man got two things. Got a buddy mine that was
going to go in the Navy, but he decided to
go in the army because his last name was Spiller
and he didn't want to be Semen Spiller. Yeah, and
then the other one that was the lady used to
work for the state of Texas and her name was
Sarah Baumfalk. That was funny back twenty years ago.
Speaker 1 (32:08):
Yeah, well there was one here. Let's see if I
can find this before before the show was over there.
It was a pretty good one, and I got a
kick out of this guy's a good story teller. Here
he says, this is from Patrick Eppler when I was
a young elementary school boy. I was going to school
(32:29):
with a kid and his name was Archibald stink Finger.
He was so ashamed of his name growing up that
whenever he turned eighteen and became a legal adult, he
went to court and had his name changed to John
stink Finger. Now, if that's not funny, I don't know
what it is. That's that's quality right there. Wherever you are,
(32:51):
Patrick Eppler, I think you win the name game for today.
If he didn't get a chance to get in, or
if I left you on hold, apologies, you can email
me through the website Michael Berryshow dot com. While you're there,
you can sign up for the Daily Blast. Darryl Kunda
works hard on that. We send links to stories. We
worked on a couple of funny memes per day. You
can buy our merchandise while you're there. It goes to
(33:13):
the team. We do appreciate it. And our Palm Beach
trip is almost completely full. If you have been interested
in that and I haven't pulled the trigger yet, you
can send an email to get more details. And again
that's the same place where you send me every other
email through the website Michael Berryshow dot com or Michael
at Michael Berryshow dot com. Reminder, Michael is always m
(33:35):
I C H A E L B E R O Y,
and I do love to hear from you.
I'm a Jeopardy nut, absolute nut, and when Alex and
now Ken Jennings, I hate Ken Jennings politics, I hate him.
But Ken Jennings is an amazing host of Jeopardy. And
you have to understand for me to say that, I
never wanted to say that Ken Jennings does a phenomenal judge.
(00:20):
There's only one Alex Trebek. You can't criticize a guy
because he's not Alex Trebek. You know, people will tell
me that that that Klay and Buck are not rush Limbaugh.
They know that somebody had to do the show, and
no matter who you are, you're not Rush Limbaugh. And
they're not saying they are. So it was. It was.
(00:43):
It's always interesting to me when they come back after
a break and the judges have conferred and they announced that,
oh no, no, you did get the answer correct or
the other one is are you know the the analytics
team has done the research and this is the first
time and so our analytics team has done the research.
(01:04):
Ramon has been consulted in San Diego where he is.
Jim has led the investigation. Chad is in Hawaii working
on the back porch of a beautiful Lenai everyone agrees.
This is the first intro to a segment that Kunda
both created, the segment idea and the intro music for
(01:26):
the Bad Name Game. I think he's got a relative
with a bad name. And here we go, Colley, bad name, ladys.
It's America's favorite game of shame.
Speaker 2 (01:37):
You married a prince with a last name full of stitch.
Speaker 3 (01:42):
Bad name shame game.
Speaker 1 (01:53):
All right, to the phone lines we go. It's the
bad name shame game. But it could also be someone
with a fancy name like Langston, Willcox Turner. Greg, you're
on the Michael Berry Show. Let me try these gim
Let's see if I can get on. If I can
get there, we go. Go ahead, Greg, you're okay?
Speaker 4 (02:12):
All right, I'm not okay. Well, I had a guy
I worked for named Sass and so I can just
imagine his girlfriends telling her girlfriends and last night I
had a date and night kissed Bill's ass.
Speaker 1 (02:29):
See, that's the kind of stupid stuff. The first time
I hear that someone's last name is zas that I
think up And I can't say most of them, because
you know, it's not a political correctness. I end up
hurting a lot of people's feelings because I think I'm funny,
and sometimes it's not. It's you know, the person is
sensitive and the rest of the people in the group
think I'm an ass. Pete, you're on the Michael Berry Show.
(02:52):
What's yours?
Speaker 2 (02:54):
Hey, Michael.
Speaker 5 (02:55):
I worked in customer service for twenty years, and undoubtedly
when a woman will walk up and I would say hi, there,
what's your name? And they would say Rebecca Cox Cox,
they always had to spell it. They always had to
make sure you knew it was Cox.
Speaker 1 (03:12):
Yeah.
Speaker 5 (03:13):
I mean, if if I ran into two hundred people
like that, it was two hundred for two hundred, which.
Speaker 1 (03:18):
It was crazy. Can you imagine how awful that was
with them? Where did you work?
Speaker 5 (03:27):
I worked for a automotive repair shop here in the
Houston area. It's a it's a big franchise.
Speaker 1 (03:37):
Okay, fair enough. Do you still work there?
Speaker 6 (03:39):
Yeah?
Speaker 5 (03:40):
Uh no, I'm retired. Retired twenty years government, twenty years with.
Speaker 1 (03:44):
Them, right on. And were you a mechanic?
Speaker 7 (03:50):
No, I was.
Speaker 5 (03:51):
I was a management type thing.
Speaker 1 (03:53):
I kind of Oh, sorry, I cut it too early,
My bad. Oh, Jim, what does it have to do
whether they were black or not? John, You're up? Go ahead?
Speaker 7 (04:07):
Yes, custy Western legend Pasty Kline. Her second husband name
was Charlie Dick.
Speaker 1 (04:20):
Is that who she was married to when she died?
Speaker 8 (04:24):
Yes?
Speaker 7 (04:24):
Yes, and he's still alive today.
Speaker 1 (04:29):
I don't know that I knew that. I don't know
that I knew that. Christine. You're on the Michael Berry Show.
What's yours?
Speaker 6 (04:38):
Hi, Michael? So I'm just passing us coins right now
on itn C If I see Kenny Duncan, I'm as
trainer anyway.
Speaker 1 (04:46):
Oh yeah, I hear about you.
Speaker 6 (04:49):
Yeah, yeah, he's in great shape. Several decades ago, I
was in pharmacy school at u of H College of Pharmacy,
and I had a couple of kids in my class
that we would sit up in the front of the class,
and one of them's name was Lena Wong. And then
the guy that sat behind us, name was Robin Watt,
(05:12):
and he would always kid Lena because he was so
studious and he was barely scraping by. And he told
her one day, you know what, Lena, after we graduate
and we become pharmacists, we're going to open a pharmacy
and we're gonna call it what long Pharmacies. I just
don't remember that after all.
Speaker 1 (05:30):
These years Asian names are. She was so much fun
because you get you know, the hung lows and all those.
But I grew up in Orangefield, which was a high
school I went to, had a large Vietnamese population, and
they had everyone in the community worked either in shrimping
(05:54):
or in a nursery. They had a big plant nursery there,
and as is common, most of their last name was Win.
And I was a kid with no filter, and I
created every win joke. You can imagine. If you were
to ask my classmates, my high school classmates, who some
(06:15):
of whom I still keep up with tweet win twe
would say how many? He said, how many win jokes
did Michael Berry have when y'all are in high school?
She'd say, have to be one hundred, And that's not
an exaggeration. I would say. You know, the kids would
named who what, when, who when and what when they
lived in a Winnebago. They were all these sorts of jokes.
(06:37):
But I will tell you, as a group, by far
as an immigrant group after Indians, the most successful Indian
group ever. And I don't say that to cover my
tracks because I have so many good wind jokes I
say that because I've always been in deep admiration of
(07:00):
Vietnamese Americans. But at some point when I've had a
couple of drinks, so some of my Vietnamese friends from
from school will remind me of the jokes I came
up with that I didn't remember of varying quality. But
that's what you're supposed to do when you're young. You're
supposed to make you're supposed to I had to live
through the Michael Row Your Boat Ashore, which I thought
(07:23):
was the stupidest. I mean, that's lame, that's not even
that's not even funny. Or give it to Mikey. He'll
like it. He likes everything. Okay, well us, I mean
you're not even creative now, Barry. Yeah, you can imagine
with guys in a locker room. What what? What kind
of stuff? I heard on that?
Speaker 9 (07:42):
All right?
Speaker 1 (07:43):
Seven one three nine nine nine one thousand. Your highly pretentious,
precocious names are really really bad names coming up.
Speaker 10 (07:55):
You are listening to Michael Barry's Shaw night.
Speaker 1 (08:01):
I worked for Bdo Sideman and we had an accountant
named how Duke Doe. Doe actually rhymes with so although
it's spelled do. When he submitted his resume, the HR
director read howdy do do? Rhyming with two and thought
it was a fake resume phonetically how do you do?
(08:25):
He applied three times before he got hired. He was
awesome and our go to it guy, in addition to
being one of the best accountants at the firm. And
there you have it. I'm going to have to get
through some of these emails because some of them are
just they're just too good, not too Let's start with Ruth.
You're up, sweetheart, Go.
Speaker 10 (08:46):
Ahead, Michael. I worked in the staffing and placement industry
for thirty four years and we ran into a lot
of entertaining names. Our top four were Mercedes Speed, Princess
High Tower okay, and the last two, which are slightly inappropriate,
(09:09):
are Anita Dick and our top favorite, Rhoda Glasscock.
Speaker 1 (09:17):
You know them. The name Glasscock is not so uncommon.
I will hear it mentioned or see it written. And
I've always thought that's an interesting name to go through
through life with, especially a lot of old English names.
They're they're they're pretty interesting. How old are you writ
Ruth sixty sixty. You may be the youngest Ruth ever met.
Speaker 10 (09:45):
You don't run into many outside of a nursing home.
Speaker 8 (09:48):
No.
Speaker 1 (09:49):
My grandmother was named Ruth Barry and she passed at
ninety nine, just short of one hundred. Oh shoot, my
dad's eighty five. I bet you that's been ten years ago,
so she'd be one hundred and ten. So she's got
fifty years on you. But you just don't. That's not true.
I had a college classmate named Ruth what was her
(10:12):
last name? But you just don't. You don't hear Ruth
one of those names. It just kind of went away. Mark,
you're on the Michael Berry Show.
Speaker 11 (10:18):
Go ahead, yeah, Mark, Michael. Our daughter, her name is
was Skyler man Amn. She married a gentleman with the
last name Hacker, and I asked her she should hyphenate
her name because she's a nurse at a urologist, and
it would be She's.
Speaker 1 (10:39):
I love it.
Speaker 11 (10:40):
And my brother in Austin went to the top eurologist
for vasectomy that you can look us up. His name
is doctor Richard Chopp.
Speaker 5 (10:50):
Look it up.
Speaker 1 (10:51):
Oh, I love that. Hey, Jim, make sure they're not
on speakerphone or bluetooth. Just remind them when you when
you pick it up, because I get I can hardly
hear them. When you do, Mike, you're up. Go ahead.
Speaker 9 (11:03):
Hey, it's kind of hard to follow, Ruis. Those are
some good ones. But I'm sure you've heard of the
millionaire over here in San Antonio, that it was named
Dick Tips.
Speaker 1 (11:12):
No, well, no, I have not. What's he famous for?
Speaker 9 (11:16):
He owned some cemeteries. He owns a couple. Well, I'm
sure he's got his hands and everything, but he owns
a couple of cemeteries. You're in San Antonio, I'm sure
with some other stuff.
Speaker 1 (11:25):
Well, I've always thought that HB would be named after
the last name of the owner, but for the fact
that it was Butt and Uh. I had a law
school classmate named named Eric Haidu. Eric is a lawyer
in Austin these days. And Eric had come down from
Indiana and he'd gone to the University of Indiana. He
(11:48):
was the biggest Bobby Knight fan you'll ever meet. And
he the first day we're all hanging out, and he said, y'all,
I've got a grocery store. It must be Jewish because
it's called Hebe. And he thought that was the funniest thing,
like that was some short form of Hebrew. Well, I
(12:11):
didn't know chib. I don't think i'd ever seen an chib.
This was nineteen ninety three, but we had classmates that
were from parts of Texas that had an HIB and
they said, no, you goof, it's Howard E. Butt. And
then he really busts out laughing and he says, so
it's not heb it's Howard E.
Speaker 7 (12:31):
Butt.
Speaker 1 (12:32):
And they said yes. And for weeks to this day,
I still kid him about. You know, this was his
introduction coming down to Texas to a grocery store and
all the humor it gave him. Craig, you're on the
Michael Berry Show. Go ahead, sir.
Speaker 12 (12:49):
What's up, Michael?
Speaker 1 (12:50):
How you doing good?
Speaker 3 (12:52):
You got me?
Speaker 2 (12:53):
I'll went to high school.
Speaker 12 (12:54):
With a girl named Bunnie Bell, and we went to
see Eddie Rabbit. After the show. We met him and
she said, Eddie, my name is Bunny Bell, and if
you marry me, my name will be Bunny Rabbit.
Speaker 13 (13:06):
That's right.
Speaker 1 (13:09):
I didn't see that coming. I like his particular storytelling style. Colleen,
you're on the Michael Berry Show.
Speaker 14 (13:16):
Go ahead, sweetheart, Hi Michael, good morning. My last name
is Has and it's spelled h A s. Everybody always
gets it wrong. And I real quickly say, hey, don't
make an ass out of Hoss, because a lot of
people go, h A S S.
Speaker 1 (13:36):
Are you really my ownership?
Speaker 14 (13:40):
No, I am not. So we're on our own out
here where is out here? And Montgomery? Oh okay, and
we live up to Montgomery.
Speaker 1 (13:53):
I met Fred, he said, Hass, But I don't know
if that was because it was easier as a retail
named Fred Hass, Toyota and all of those. And I
think Jay, his son, took over. So I don't know
what became of all that, but I think it was
Fred Hass who had started in Orange. And so I
(14:14):
was at Formula one or one of the race car
deals they had in downtown Houston, and he was sitting
in front of me, and I had been invited as
his guest, but I didn't know I was his guest.
I was invited by someone else, but it was his tickets.
And so he sat down right in front of me
and he says, nice to meet you, and big fan,
thank you. And I have an Orange, Texas connection. I said, okay,
(14:37):
well at least he knows I'm from Orange. Okay, what
is that? And he said, I started my first business
in Orange, I had the CON's Appliance Store. I believe
it was Consaplance store, and I think it was Fred Has.
It was one of the car news but I think
it was Fred Hass. But he pronounced it Hass instead
of Has, although I've heard it pronounced both ways. Scott,
(14:59):
You're go ahead.
Speaker 3 (15:03):
Hey, Michael. Uh. Back in the seventies, when I was
working in Houston here, I worked as a fella in.
His uh given name was Flint Sparks and he was
from Kentucky hillbilly from Kentucky.
Speaker 1 (15:17):
Flint Sparks. You got to think that his parents had
a sense of humor, right, because that doesn't First of all,
Flint's not a regular name. I mean, that's somebody that's
making a memorable name. Delinda, you're up, sweetheart. Go ahead, hey, Michael.
Speaker 15 (15:32):
I have a neighbor.
Speaker 9 (15:33):
Her name is Hailey Raper R A P. E. R.
Speaker 15 (15:37):
And she married a gentleman.
Speaker 1 (15:38):
His last name is Gay Raper Gay Hale Gay out
of the frying pan into the fire right there. I mean,
she's just that poor woman is that's Let's go to
Julie real quick. Julie, Oh sorry, can you get it
in Julie, go ahead, allow me to introduce myself.
Speaker 8 (15:58):
My name is Mitt.
Speaker 1 (15:59):
We'll come Michael Genius. Well, today we have several meetings
with heads of state on the schedule for today, we're
talking about bad names you marry into or out of,
or that you knew, and how someone handled it. I mean,
the only way to handle it is is to make
(16:22):
it a joke. It's part of your identity. Some people
change their names because I look back now to how
nervous kids are. We had a classmate he passed in
his forties, much too soon. His name was Craig Hobbs.
Everybody loved Craig, and Craig's legal name was Dustin. So
(16:43):
I guess when his mother would sign him up. Every year,
she would sign him up under his legal name. Although
back then it wasn't like today you could make up
any name. Nobody cross referenced anything. You didn't have a
database where you could look and see he could have
been Joe Smith. So every year, on the first day,
when the teacher would call out the names, we'd start
(17:03):
getting to h and all of the guys. We ran
around together a group of us, Toby Schultz, Ben Wernig,
Craig Hobbs, Stephen Bradley. You know, there was a there
was a whole group of us from from elementary all
the way up, and I can remember, especially in elementary school,
let's say third grade, where little boys are trying to
be real tough, especially around the other little boys, and
(17:25):
we'd get we'd start going through and we'd go to B, C, D, E,
F G, and we'd all be a twitter, like we
couldn't wait because I bet it was gonna be Dustin Hobbes.
And the teacher would say, as she would go to
say Dustin Hobbes, he'd say, it's Craig, and we would
all go, Craig, don't interrupt, yes, ma'am, could he what's
(17:47):
the name? And they'd say what, she'd say what? She
wouldn't know, And we already knew we'd been doing this
a couple of years now. We knew the whole drill.
And he was so embarrassed of the name Dustin being
his legal name. Probably name for Dustin Hoffman, I don't know,
but you think about this, yeah, because we were born
in seventy and what was the graduate sixty nine? I
(18:09):
bet you that's who he was named for. But it's
not like Dustin was a bad name. But at that age,
for whatever reason, it was a bad name because it
wasn't his name. His name was Craig with a K,
K R E G, and we would jokingly call him
Dustin for the entirety of our school time. And it's
so silly now, but at that time, for some reason,
(18:30):
that was really embarrassing. You look back now and it's
just funny. Janice, you're on the Michael Berry Show. Go aheads.
Speaker 11 (18:36):
We heard.
Speaker 12 (18:38):
Hi.
Speaker 11 (18:38):
Yes, my main name was bald b A L L.
Speaker 3 (18:41):
And I'm married the guy with the last name.
Speaker 1 (18:44):
Oh, well, there you go. Do you hyphenate your last name?
Speaker 16 (18:49):
No, I don't even use that name anymore.
Speaker 1 (18:53):
We move on. You know, it's crazy because women go
by different names in the course of their lives. Most
of us don't. I've been Michael Berry since you know,
I can remember, and that's just kind of who I am.
I can't imagine my wife went from nonea the Vencatationwitin
to Nandida Berry. It's like a whole new identity and
(19:16):
women do it every day. It's crazy think about it.
Of course, they wear high heels too, and I can't imagine.
That's the whole thing about men cross dressed, and I
ever understood they got the short end of the stick. Literally,
we got the good one. We get to go straight
into the bathroom. We don't have to wear a makeup,
We don't have to do our hair. We can roll
(19:38):
out of bed, run a comb across our head, and
go out in public. We don't have to wear makeup.
Why would anybody? Nobody thinks to themselves, man being a
dude is such a drag. I want to live a
woman's life. That's insane. Why would you do that? Anyway? Champ,
you're up.
Speaker 8 (20:01):
Our accountant had a wonderful secretary with the great sense
of humor. And her last name was Pittsworth.
Speaker 1 (20:10):
Oh okay, was she cute?
Speaker 8 (20:15):
Yes? She was very pretty.
Speaker 1 (20:18):
Is Champ your Christian name your given name or is
it a nickname? No, that's my real name, and it's
just Champ, not Champion.
Speaker 8 (20:27):
No, it's just Champ. And that's my oldest son's name too.
Speaker 1 (20:32):
Okay, Well there you go. I like that interesting. Charlie.
You're on the Michael Berry Show. What you got, sir? Yeah?
Speaker 17 (20:41):
When I was ten or eleven, when I had a
friend his name was Peter Bender. And then when I
got a little older, I had another friend. His name
was His name was Kevin bus and he always told
me that if you ever had a boy, he was
going name Harry Harry Buds.
Speaker 1 (20:57):
Well, there you go, let's go to Roberts Robert. You're
only Michael Barry show.
Speaker 3 (21:03):
Go ahead, Hey, Michael, I was.
Speaker 15 (21:07):
I grew up in Indiana. I went to high school
and there was a girl, probably a couple of years
in front of me. Her first name was Candy, Candy Lawrence,
beautiful girl, corn corn bread. And right after she graduated
she was gonna get married. And I was crushed, you know,
because I thought I had a chance, right, But she
must have really loved the guy because his name was
Jeff Peters. So her name was Candy Peters.
Speaker 1 (21:31):
Well, it's not the worst one we've heard today. Reminder, folks,
please don't be on speakerphone or bluetooth. I know you
have to wait for a minute, but we can't hear
you when you're on the line. Randy. Go ahead.
Speaker 11 (21:44):
Yeah.
Speaker 16 (21:44):
So it was in the late eighties and we were
at the Houston Rodeo and we're about eight nine years
old than me and my cousin are just little Hellion
and we're running around and my aunt yell Randy Travit
get over here. And we were there to see Randy
Travis and everybody turns around. He looks at her like
it looks at us like we're Randy Travis running around
(22:06):
be a bunch of heathens.
Speaker 1 (22:07):
Yeah, or Hellion's which you first said, which is one
of my favorite words. And you've ever been around little
boys running around together, Helen's is a perfect word, Scott,
you and to Michael Berry show go ahead.
Speaker 3 (22:20):
Yeah. When I was an elementary school in the sixties,
my teachers wouldn't let me use my middle name, and
my first name is Dale. So these kids come up
to me and they call me Dale Evans. And the
way I handled that, I just tell him they could
kiss my last.
Speaker 1 (22:41):
You know what's funny about that, Scott, is probably ninety
percent of our audience has no idea who Dale Evans is,
But when you were I do. But when you were
a kid, I guess some of our older folks would.
I would be interesting to know what the age cutoff
is for people who would know who Dale Evans is. Lisa,
You're own to Michael Berry, show go ahead.
Speaker 11 (23:04):
Hi, Michael, thank you for having me on the show.
Speaker 14 (23:06):
I went from Newberry to Barry when I got married.
Speaker 1 (23:10):
Oh, there you go. That's not a big change. That's
not a big change. But you know, I'm fascinated by
this concept that we take for granted that women just
changed their name. That's part of getting married. And you
know that the modern woman, which was began in the seventies.
This was Hillary Rodham who didn't take Bill Clinton's name.
Didn't do that because somehow that was subjugating yourself. But
(23:33):
she sure did when she ran when he started running
for president, didn't she. Chris, you own to Michael Berry,
show go ahead.
Speaker 2 (23:40):
Yeah.
Speaker 13 (23:41):
Back in high school, my freshman year eighty three at
Conra High School, we had to go get our pictures
taken for the yearbook. And I don't know if it
was the guy himself or somebody did it for him,
but you have to fill out a card to associate
your picture with the name. And anyway, he put down
Jack and then the last name M.
Speaker 7 (24:02):
E O F F.
Speaker 13 (24:03):
And it wound up in the yearbook. It didn't uh,
it didn't get cut out. You know.
Speaker 1 (24:09):
That's one of those that you see on social media
sites for the little clip where you know they'll go
up and ask, you know, could you call for so
and so to meet me at the at the customer
service desk and in this week little old lady, and
she has no idea and she reads it. That's one
of the names that's always that's always read off you.
(24:29):
You probably never have fun again like you did in
high school over the what kind of stuff can we
get in the high school yearbook? Well, that's the kind
of thing that when you're at that age you could
laugh for the game everything. Joe Wright, I am reminded
of the incredibly bad name of Houston's own I'm a Hog.
(24:50):
Her parents were quite cruel. Also, I had a proctologist,
now retired, named doctor Butts. What a perfect name for
a proctologist. Anytime I mentioned I'm a hog, my mentor
Walter Zivily. His mother, Jane Bieler Zively, was the personal
(25:11):
assistant to I'm a Hog and ran her office for
many many years. I mean maybe fifty years, I don't know,
some high number of years. And folks every time I
mentioned I'm a hog will say, you know, she has
a sister named Eura. No, she did not have a
(25:33):
sister named Era. That's the joke. She also didn't have
a sister named Husa, which is another one. She did
have a father who was governor of Texas, and he
would campaign claiming and he would rattle off a series
of hog names. But it was not. It was not
(25:54):
as many people believe. It's one of those things that
if you've heard it enough times, you might actually start
to believe it. Delenda says, I have more bad names
I've run across. I went to school with Dusty Weathers
and his sister is Wendy and brother Stormy Katie High School.
At Katie Junior High, I had a friend named Penny Nichols.
Her dad called her sixth sense. My married last name
(26:15):
is McPhail. I guess it's better than my maiden name.
No whack. Kyle writes. There was a lady named Julia
Sullivan who was about to marry Glenn Gully, and her
name would be Julia Gully, but Julia Gully, but her
wedding singer, dude Robert Hart, broke that marriage up before
the wedding. Oh my, there's the story. What's that? Oh
(26:41):
that's the move from the movie The wedding singer Okay.
I hadn't seen that. Okay had some good friends that
got married, Ryan Stiff and Melanie Cram. It was the
Stiff Cram wedding. Keith writes. In the military, I met
a young lady who had enlisted in the Navy. Lower
enlisted personnel in the Navy are called by their rank
of seamen, then her last name. This young lady's last
(27:03):
name was Swallow, so she always addressed herself as Seaman Swallow.
I would have joined a different branch of service if
I was her. Harry writes, Our secretary treasurer at AFM
in Nashville is named Will Barrow. I think it's Harry Wilkinson.
I think he's dead. Series Rogers says, great music, except
(27:24):
maybe for the last Beatles song Let's See. Jonathan says,
in the earlier eighties, my family went to visit our
relatives in New Jersey. While having dinner, they were talking
about a cousin out there named Roseanne who was going
to marry a man with the last name Dana. Due
to Saturday Night Live, there were a lot of jokes
going on about her Rosanna and Rosanna Dana was such
(27:45):
a great character on those early seasons. My wife's uncle's
last name is Carol, and he married a woman named Carol.
You know, we had a couple. He was a deacon
and she was a leader amongst the ladies at Old
First Orn Baptist Church. Beloved couple. And his name was
(28:05):
Archie Jones. And when she married him, her name Archie
became Archie Jones. And so when somebody was referencing them,
which you did often, it would be Archie boy and
Archie girl. And I've known of other couples where they
were Tracy's or Kelly's and they get married. Let's see here,
Kimberly says. My next door neighbor's given name was Candy Box.
(28:28):
My brother had a high school friend last named Mountain.
The kid's names were Cliff, Rocky, Smokey, and Candy. My favorite.
A customer at the bank was Middle Eastern. He was
a sheikh named Ma Boob my Boob. I had a
friend named Dick, Tip says Triumph. One't year, on the
first day of school, the teacher was calling names and
(28:49):
she said she was going to change his name to Rick.
He responded, no, thanks, I've always been Dick, and I
will always be Dick. He would introduce himself as Dick Tip.
The person would repeat the name, and he'd respond, Yep,
that's me, always on point. You know, the fact is,
if you're gonna have a funny name, you better just.
Speaker 13 (29:09):
Is.
Speaker 1 (29:10):
You better just embrace it. There's just no way around that.
Gay Adams was gay. Snowball owns Pooky's Cafe in Beadias, Texas.
Josh writes, Hey, Michael, the subject of last names, find
my father before me and my daughter have heard the
same joke. You ought to do that, and I do
believe you have used this on your show. The most
(29:31):
interesting combination name I've seen has been a lady running
for some type of office. Her name was Robin Rape,
rob oh Rob Robin Rape for Rob n Rape. Okay,
that's like Dewey Cheataman. How there used to be a
Brazoria County official with a name Jackie Moff. That'd be
(29:53):
interesting to know. Jason writes, Goodyear, I was one of
the guys business cards, Scott Dumbcomb, poor fella. I asked
the chick I was dating at the time if she
would date me if I had that last name. She
said no. I dodged that bullet with her anyway, So
I guess he didn't end up marrying that girl. Kenneth writes.
(30:14):
When I was in the Air Force, I was a
medic and there were two doctors, a urologist named doctor
Clapp and another named doctor Bill's. Well, that's an interesting
group of folks there. Let's go to Philip, Philip, you're
old Michael Berry Show. What's yours?
Speaker 6 (30:30):
Man?
Speaker 9 (30:30):
I got a buddy of mine is dad's a psychiatrist
and his name is doctor Looney.
Speaker 1 (30:37):
It's awesome. It's almost as if people gravitate toward a
career like that when they have a funny name, like
wouldn't it be funny or ironic? And maybe subconsciously they do.
I don't know, but it does seem to happen a lot. Rick,
You're on the Michael Berry Show. Go ahead, yo.
Speaker 11 (30:55):
Michael was working as a maintenance man and I went
to work on a unit in the lady's name was
Douanna do wanna dick?
Speaker 1 (31:03):
Oh my goodness, Dan Pastorina Pastrina told me that that
that Anita Martin, that Anita Martini's name was really Anita Martini.
I want to say. He told me that was the case.
I don't know if that's true, but I believe he
said that. You never know with him because he kind
(31:24):
of says things and then you ask if he's telling
the truth. Then he kind of sort of gives you
a ry smile, so you gotta check, you gotta fact
check everything. Not that he would lie, but that he'd
make a fool out of you by getting you to
go off and say that, and then it wouldn't be true.
Don You're up. What you got? Don has nothing? Don
has absolutely nothing? Rick, what you got?
Speaker 2 (31:48):
Man got two things. Got a buddy mine that was
going to go in the Navy, but he decided to
go in the army because his last name was Spiller
and he didn't want to be Semen Spiller. Yeah, and
then the other one that was the lady used to
work for the state of Texas and her name was
Sarah Baumfalk. That was funny back twenty years ago.
Speaker 1 (32:08):
Yeah, well there was one here. Let's see if I
can find this before before the show was over there.
It was a pretty good one, and I got a
kick out of this guy's a good story teller. Here
he says, this is from Patrick Eppler when I was
a young elementary school boy. I was going to school
(32:29):
with a kid and his name was Archibald stink Finger.
He was so ashamed of his name growing up that
whenever he turned eighteen and became a legal adult, he
went to court and had his name changed to John
stink Finger. Now, if that's not funny, I don't know
what it is. That's that's quality right there. Wherever you are,
(32:51):
Patrick Eppler, I think you win the name game for today.
If he didn't get a chance to get in, or
if I left you on hold, apologies, you can email
me through the website Michael Berryshow dot com. While you're there,
you can sign up for the Daily Blast. Darryl Kunda
works hard on that. We send links to stories. We
worked on a couple of funny memes per day. You
can buy our merchandise while you're there. It goes to
(33:13):
the team. We do appreciate it. And our Palm Beach
trip is almost completely full. If you have been interested
in that and I haven't pulled the trigger yet, you
can send an email to get more details. And again
that's the same place where you send me every other
email through the website Michael Berryshow dot com or Michael
at Michael Berryshow dot com. Reminder, Michael is always m
(33:35):
I C H A E L B E R O Y,
and I do love to hear from you.
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