Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
Can I ask you kind of a true false question?
I think I learned something yesterday that I didn't know
nor would I know. Okay, so what's the easiest way?
So let me let me ask you this. Let me
ask you this?
Speaker 2 (00:15):
And you said your name? Was it Christy or Christy?
Speaker 3 (00:19):
Christy?
Speaker 2 (00:19):
Christy? All right? So Christy, let me ask you this.
You ready? Yeah? Yeah? Follow me here. You know you know,
like you're an adult, you've had to fart in your life.
Speaker 3 (00:28):
Right, yes?
Speaker 2 (00:31):
So you know how?
Speaker 1 (00:32):
Like and listen, I've done it also, right, everybody listening
is farted in their life, right, you know how?
Speaker 2 (00:38):
Sometimes you know how?
Speaker 4 (00:41):
Where is this going? No?
Speaker 2 (00:43):
Work with me? Work with me? You know how?
Speaker 1 (00:45):
Sometimes if you're in a situation or in a place
where you feel like you have to fart, you can
you can hold it.
Speaker 2 (00:52):
You can choke one back, right?
Speaker 3 (00:54):
Yeah?
Speaker 1 (00:57):
True?
Speaker 2 (00:57):
Is it? Is it true that if you have to,
if you have to, Queef? You wait? Yeah? Why why
are you looking at me?
Speaker 4 (01:09):
Sorry?
Speaker 2 (01:11):
Did my face say it?
Speaker 1 (01:11):
All?
Speaker 2 (01:13):
Whatever? Your chief? Quef?
Speaker 1 (01:16):
What is if you if you can't choke that back,
you can't hold that?
Speaker 3 (01:25):
I would say, Saul, I think there are situations where.
Speaker 2 (01:29):
You can that's not what I read. That is not research.
I learned so much at the charity golf tournament. No no, no,
this had nothing to do with that. The no no.
But I was reading something yesterday.
Speaker 1 (01:50):
I was reading this this woman, this woman was talking
about her quef confession.
Speaker 4 (01:55):
And she was can we stop with the word what
do you want me to call it?
Speaker 5 (02:01):
In the past we have said we're okay with vaginal flasculens.
Speaker 2 (02:05):
The okay, but that sounds immature.
Speaker 4 (02:08):
Or we've said we'll go with varting.
Speaker 2 (02:10):
The I don't like that either.
Speaker 1 (02:12):
I don't but it is what it is like, it's
a very natural thing.
Speaker 2 (02:16):
I don't call it. I don't call it varting. It
is whatever cleef anyway, and besides, it works for the story.
It's not a varting confession. It's a kleef confection. Thank you,
thank you, even though spelled completely different.
Speaker 1 (02:35):
Anyway, I was reading where this woman was talking about
she was making her quief confession, and she was talking
about how the.
Speaker 2 (02:45):
It was it happened, right, it happened.
Speaker 1 (02:48):
And she said that she oh the other the other
thing that she said true true or false?
Speaker 2 (02:54):
Christy, you can't even feel it coming on.
Speaker 3 (03:01):
I guess true. I guess true.
Speaker 1 (03:03):
Right, So that that that almost makes sense. Well you go,
you go ahead.
Speaker 3 (03:10):
Well, I just I mean there's different times. Sometimes you
can feel it, sometimes you can't. I don't know, I
don't know. That was a hard one.
Speaker 1 (03:18):
They she was saying, which would make sense. She said
that you can't feel unlike unlike a regular too, you
can't like you can feel that coming on, and that
you can choke it back.
Speaker 2 (03:30):
That with a queef, you can't. You can't feel Tyler.
Speaker 1 (03:34):
What do you I'm not gonna say with a bart
I'm not gonna say that.
Speaker 2 (03:38):
That makes me sound like a child.
Speaker 5 (03:40):
Somebody, Well, then you're not gonna love this one. Somebody
suggested the who ha harmonica.
Speaker 6 (03:50):
God anyway, but this woman was saying in her confession
that you can't feel it coming on, forgive me father.
Speaker 1 (04:01):
Therefore there four you can't choke it back because you
don't know it's coming so out of like out of nowhere,
everything's good.
Speaker 2 (04:11):
And then there goes the ho ha harmonica.
Speaker 4 (04:19):
So what do are you left to do? Cough the well, no,
I mean, you just.
Speaker 2 (04:23):
Go with it.
Speaker 5 (04:24):
Also, Christy, that seems like, what are you supposed to
do bold move just to go with it.
Speaker 2 (04:29):
What are you supposed to do? You don't know what's
coming next? Thing? I mean, you do you address it?
Speaker 7 (04:34):
You hope for lightning flash or lightning fast reflexes.
Speaker 2 (04:38):
The no no no, but like Christy. Oh.
Speaker 1 (04:41):
The other thing, the other part of this true false
is it is it most common? I mean, when you
think of common sexual positions, is it most common with
with with with doggy?
Speaker 4 (04:54):
Oh? My god?
Speaker 2 (04:55):
What is win?
Speaker 4 (04:56):
Can we be a dog aggressive?
Speaker 2 (04:58):
Please put us off the school bus? No? No, no,
But I mean we're adults, we're adults. Yes or no?
Speaker 3 (05:10):
I guess I guess I'd have to answer yes.
Speaker 2 (05:12):
Right right. And that was part of this woman's confession.
Speaker 1 (05:16):
Is that she she and she and a partner, and
they'd only been together for a little while, and that
they were they were getting intimate. I don't know if
it was the first time they were intimate, excuse me,
but it was early on in the relationship. And she
said that they were they were they were being intimate
with each other, and that that they were they were
(05:38):
they were doing doggie And next thing you know, there's
there's chief grief in the bedroom. But the whole thing
was is that she had to like, so, yes, you
have to you have to address it right, Like you
can't pretend it didn't happen.
Speaker 5 (06:02):
I feel like a partner, if they're sensitive to what
may be an embarrassing moment, would just let it go.
Speaker 1 (06:09):
This well, this woman in her confession said they had
been having Diane, they had been having Doggie right, and
they had kind of wrap that up and he was
getting ready to do something to her and and wrong moment.
(06:30):
Who ha, Harmonica got it right. So they had to
address it. And so she was like, I'll just I'm
going to go to the restroom, not because she had
done anything wrong, but she was like, hey, sorry, and
he was like, yeah, you know what, no big deal.
But she said, now I've had this but out of
the backside where she said Diane in her confession, her
CUEF confession.
Speaker 2 (06:51):
Every step was like.
Speaker 1 (06:58):
She said, she said, it was like having a bagpipe
betrayed her legs.
Speaker 2 (07:08):
She said, with like it was choreographed with every step.
Every step she said.
Speaker 1 (07:13):
It was like a kid's whoopie cushion that somebody was
like as she would take a step, they'd push on
it and push on it and push on it, but
it happens. And the whole point, the whole point of
what I was reading was you can't let that get
in the way. Even though this poor woman said she
went and sat on the toilet for what felt like
an hour.
Speaker 2 (07:32):
Just kind of deflating, if you will.
Speaker 1 (07:39):
But but I do think the well number one I
learned that you can't feel it coming on. I had
no idea, although Christy you said sometimes you can.
Speaker 3 (07:50):
It depends on the position that you're in. I think
sometimes you can feel it sometimes. But it's not like
you don't feel it like you feel a fart. You
just know something going.
Speaker 2 (08:01):
On, right. I hear you, I hear you. Do you
address it like it's happened to you?
Speaker 1 (08:06):
Of course with a partner, do you address it or
you just kind of pretend like nobody heard that?
Speaker 3 (08:15):
Uh no, My husband and I have a little giggle.
Speaker 2 (08:18):
Yeah, okay, all right, yeah, very good, very good. You
ever get it where it's sync to your walking the
soundtrack to the bathroom? All right, very good? We're adults,
Why can't we be honest with each other?
Speaker 5 (08:35):
Speaking of being adults, a DM has come in with
a suggestion for a synonym.
Speaker 4 (08:41):
Oh, yes, a bagoon burp.
Speaker 2 (08:45):
That's funny, that's cute.
Speaker 5 (08:47):
I think I found this piece. Uh and you did
a pretty good job. Recounting her confession, Oh yes, yeah,
thank you.
Speaker 4 (08:59):
She referred to.
Speaker 5 (09:00):
The original moment though as rattling the windows.
Speaker 4 (09:05):
Damn.
Speaker 5 (09:13):
But then, like you told us, as soon as I
sat up to head for the shower, another eruption occurred.
All I could do was go with it. Let that
air out of my tire. Every moment, every step was
like a sound check for a middle school band.
Speaker 2 (09:33):
But what are you supposed to do?
Speaker 1 (09:35):
And the answer is be an adult, get a giggle
for your magoomburb.
Speaker 2 (09:43):
I gotta get shirts printed up.
Speaker 5 (09:46):
Certainly, if you're you feel like the other party is
going to have fun with it as well.
Speaker 1 (09:51):
Right, But I think this one, this one was awkward
because it was so early in the relationship. But if
you're going, is the first time it happened in front
of a new partner?
Speaker 4 (10:02):
Yeah, of course?
Speaker 1 (10:03):
Okay, yeah, no, no, I would imagine it is like
I would have met, like how long have you and
Scott been married?
Speaker 4 (10:08):
Now to the twenty four years?
Speaker 1 (10:11):
Right, so now it's old hat, it's like nothing, no, no,
But like now, it wouldn't even matter, right, it would
be like whatever. Right, But if it were if God
forbids something happened and you were with a new man,
and the first time that happened, it would be it
would be it would well, no, no, it should not
be embarrassing, awkward, awkward, all right, it would be awkward.
Speaker 2 (10:31):
You shouldn't be embarrassed by it. No, no, you can't
help it. But if you've got you've got a kid's
marching band sound check in there.
Speaker 5 (10:40):
If if you've come across it before.
Speaker 4 (10:44):
Right, That's where I feel like it's sort of flat.
Speaker 5 (10:47):
In broadcasting, oftentimes we don't do this, but you're told
just to move on when some don't highlight it, right,
I feel like you could also be fine doing that.
Speaker 2 (10:58):
What just moving on?
Speaker 1 (11:00):
Yes, yes, but the first time it happens, yes, you're
supposed to move on.
Speaker 2 (11:05):
But you know, everybody is like, I heard the F bomb.
I heard it, I heard it, I heard it, I
heard it.
Speaker 4 (11:12):
Well, what does this mean? From your essays?
Speaker 5 (11:13):
Some people have a signature laugh, that's sort of what
you said, just giggle about it, right.
Speaker 4 (11:18):
Others have a signature dance move what is that?
Speaker 2 (11:23):
What is that?
Speaker 5 (11:26):
So is it to pretend as if like the move
you're following it up with caused it.
Speaker 2 (11:33):
I don't even know what does that look like?
Speaker 4 (11:37):
I don't know what I sure do I? And what
part of your body are you making this sound from
the no?
Speaker 5 (11:43):
No?
Speaker 2 (11:43):
But well what dance a mighty part.
Speaker 4 (11:49):
Play out the no?
Speaker 2 (11:51):
But you know what I mean?
Speaker 1 (11:52):
Like?
Speaker 2 (11:52):
What what what dance move of on my doing? Where
all of a sudden I queef?
Speaker 4 (11:58):
Maybe you just sort of shake your hips or something.
Speaker 2 (12:01):
Oh, I'm doing the twist.
Speaker 4 (12:05):
Now you're doing the trump trumpet?
Speaker 2 (12:12):
Where am I going line?
Speaker 8 (12:13):
To?
Speaker 2 (12:14):
Hi? Elliott in the morning?
Speaker 8 (12:17):
Hey, if you get shirts made, I'll definitely wear.
Speaker 1 (12:19):
One, yes, ma'am, Yes, ma'am.
Speaker 8 (12:25):
Yesterday at work I queezed and you can't hold it
back and you don't feel it coming on, but it
definitely there's like an air bubble that gets trapped between
your lips and if you like move your legs, it'll.
Speaker 2 (12:39):
Escape right right. Sure, But during sex.
Speaker 8 (12:44):
The first time that ever happened to me, I turned
around real quick and I was like, that wasn't a part,
that wasn't a fart, that wasn't a fart, But.
Speaker 9 (12:52):
Because it was so shocking.
Speaker 8 (12:54):
I stood up really quick and it really did shake
the window. It just made it so much worse. And
then you sit down on the toilet and it just
keeps coming.
Speaker 6 (13:07):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (13:07):
No, that's in my essay that I was reading.
Speaker 1 (13:10):
It does talk about even though it does talk about
how this woman got into the bathroom and she was like,
I just sat on the toilet and deflated.
Speaker 8 (13:18):
Yeah. It is embarrassing the first time, but after a
while it's like I don't even care.
Speaker 1 (13:23):
Yeah, exactly exactly. Hey, can I ask you this? Like,
were you audible at work yesterday? No?
Speaker 8 (13:33):
But you think it's going to be. I guess it
just depends if you have anise or oudies. But that
air bubble sometimes it feels really big and you just
it's like sometimes it's like a little pump.
Speaker 2 (13:45):
Right, yeah, and then sometimes it's like a lot bottoom.
All right, very good, very good. Thank you for your
Cleeve confession. Thank you man.
Speaker 4 (13:53):
That is not a new segment.
Speaker 1 (13:58):
Line.
Speaker 2 (14:00):
Hi Elliott in the morning.
Speaker 9 (14:02):
Hey, how's it going?
Speaker 1 (14:03):
Does this mean?
Speaker 2 (14:04):
Yeah?
Speaker 1 (14:04):
Hi?
Speaker 2 (14:04):
Who's this? Hey?
Speaker 3 (14:06):
I'm in Arlington.
Speaker 9 (14:07):
I'm a certified queen specialist.
Speaker 2 (14:09):
Like you're awesome at it, Like you got a diploma.
Speaker 9 (14:13):
Yeah, totally certified, bonded, license and insured.
Speaker 3 (14:17):
I was gonna say, so, it does.
Speaker 9 (14:19):
It does depend on the uh, the position. Like for instance,
if you remember back in the day when you would
do the bicycle, you'd be on your back and you
put your legs in the in the air and you
can like the exercise like yeah, yeah, that is for
most people. I would imagine if it's like, uh, like
air has to be able to get in there. There
(14:39):
should be no grief in a quief, and I.
Speaker 1 (14:42):
Don't, by the way, update the shirts, update the shirts.
Speaker 2 (14:47):
There's no grief in a queaf. Now that's good. By
the way, are you are you? Are you really some
kind of doctor?
Speaker 9 (14:53):
No, but I did. I did procure your mustard skittles
for you, so we have that.
Speaker 2 (14:58):
Oh, excellent, excellent. I thought you sounded familiar.
Speaker 9 (15:03):
There's no grief in a quief and I and they're
just you know, they're fun little biological party favors. And
I think that if you're with somebody and you're having sexism,
you guys should be able to farts equal funny, all
parts equal funny, right, amen, amen.
Speaker 2 (15:20):
I listen. I couldn't agree more. I couldn't agree.
Speaker 9 (15:22):
No grief in a quief.
Speaker 2 (15:24):
Amen, Thank you, ma'am, thank you.
Speaker 9 (15:26):
I have a great thing.
Speaker 2 (15:27):
You have the same.
Speaker 5 (15:28):
Now, remember it was a week or two ago somebody
brought up tilted uteruses.
Speaker 2 (15:37):
That does sound familiar. That does sound familiar. I don't
remember what we were talking about, but that does sound familiar.
Speaker 5 (15:45):
But we were just sent a note explaining that although
you may be able to work on the pelvic floor
and your strengthening of your core, people with the retroverted
or tilted uterus they struggle with this a lot.
Speaker 2 (16:01):
Can't help, no kidding apparently, so oh put that on
your dating profile. Hey, but no grief right now, No
zero zero grief. By the way, all parts are funny.
Line too. You know what she said though, she said,
it's like a little party favor. You know what that
(16:22):
reminds me of, Tyler.
Speaker 1 (16:24):
Remember when you went to that that cuddle party.
Speaker 2 (16:27):
Yes, and they were.
Speaker 1 (16:28):
Like, if anybody gets a boner, that's just that's just
up exactly exactly.
Speaker 4 (16:36):
Weird.
Speaker 2 (16:41):
Am I going to line too? I could do that.
Hi Elliott the morning. Yeah, Hi, who's this?
Speaker 1 (16:49):
Hey? This is Toyer from Houston.
Speaker 2 (16:52):
Oh, yes, how are you?
Speaker 6 (16:54):
Hey?
Speaker 9 (16:55):
I'm calling to let you know that.
Speaker 2 (16:58):
Wait, I'm sorry. All I'm hearing is I'm sorry, sorry, sorry,
I was, I was.
Speaker 1 (17:05):
I was calling to let you know that I can
queep on command the okay, ma'am, No, no, no, no, no,
what a skill though.
Speaker 9 (17:17):
Yeah, yeah, the first time I happened with me and
my partner, I told.
Speaker 2 (17:21):
Them, Okay, all right, very very good, Thank you, ma'am.
Thank you. Can I'm sure your ways needs you.
Speaker 5 (17:33):
I should I read the name for this. I guess
I can because it is public. Maybe I'll read the
message first and then I will tell you who sent it. Okay,
these are the segments I desperately want to call in for,
but I have a job and use my full name
on here.
Speaker 2 (17:52):
On here, oh on here.
Speaker 4 (17:56):
On this program.
Speaker 2 (17:57):
Oh Aaron M. Barlow. By the way, that's her sound.
Speaker 7 (18:06):
As she as she walks to the bathroom, sit on the.
Speaker 2 (18:18):
Kimmode, and.
Speaker 4 (18:25):
I think I have audio of that under press. Those
are the monkey yodels.
Speaker 2 (18:39):
That's not what I want the well, I mean, but
she could call in.
Speaker 4 (18:44):
She's saying she can't.
Speaker 1 (18:46):
Why why what is having a job have to do
with any of it?
Speaker 2 (18:49):
I'm being serious, What would that have to do with
any of it. That doesn't make any sense to me?
Speaker 4 (18:55):
Is it the demonstration? You just.
Speaker 2 (19:01):
Be right out.
Speaker 1 (19:07):
No, no, But but honestly she shouldn't that. I have
a problem with that. I have a problem with that.
Speaker 4 (19:14):
Well she's not saying you do, but she's saying her But.
Speaker 2 (19:18):
Why would but why would her employer.
Speaker 1 (19:21):
Like think of think of like who are who are
women in management?
Speaker 2 (19:25):
Here? Yvonne done it, Liz Handler done it? No, you
know what I mean. They've all queethed. Oh they have.
I'm going to refrain from asking them later.
Speaker 4 (19:38):
I mean, a good idea
Can I ask you kind of a true false question?
I think I learned something yesterday that I didn't know
nor would I know. Okay, so what's the easiest way?
So let me let me ask you this. Let me
ask you this?
Speaker 2 (00:15):
And you said your name? Was it Christy or Christy?
Speaker 3 (00:19):
Christy?
Speaker 2 (00:19):
Christy? All right? So Christy, let me ask you this.
You ready? Yeah? Yeah? Follow me here. You know you know,
like you're an adult, you've had to fart in your life.
Speaker 3 (00:28):
Right, yes?
Speaker 2 (00:31):
So you know how?
Speaker 1 (00:32):
Like and listen, I've done it also, right, everybody listening
is farted in their life, right, you know how?
Speaker 2 (00:38):
Sometimes you know how?
Speaker 4 (00:41):
Where is this going? No?
Speaker 2 (00:43):
Work with me? Work with me? You know how?
Speaker 1 (00:45):
Sometimes if you're in a situation or in a place
where you feel like you have to fart, you can
you can hold it.
Speaker 2 (00:52):
You can choke one back, right?
Speaker 3 (00:54):
Yeah?
Speaker 1 (00:57):
True?
Speaker 2 (00:57):
Is it? Is it true that if you have to,
if you have to, Queef? You wait? Yeah? Why why
are you looking at me?
Speaker 4 (01:09):
Sorry?
Speaker 2 (01:11):
Did my face say it?
Speaker 1 (01:11):
All?
Speaker 2 (01:13):
Whatever? Your chief? Quef?
Speaker 1 (01:16):
What is if you if you can't choke that back,
you can't hold that?
Speaker 3 (01:25):
I would say, Saul, I think there are situations where.
Speaker 2 (01:29):
You can that's not what I read. That is not research.
I learned so much at the charity golf tournament. No no, no,
this had nothing to do with that. The no no.
But I was reading something yesterday.
Speaker 1 (01:50):
I was reading this this woman, this woman was talking
about her quef confession.
Speaker 4 (01:55):
And she was can we stop with the word what
do you want me to call it?
Speaker 5 (02:01):
In the past we have said we're okay with vaginal flasculens.
Speaker 2 (02:05):
The okay, but that sounds immature.
Speaker 4 (02:08):
Or we've said we'll go with varting.
Speaker 2 (02:10):
The I don't like that either.
Speaker 1 (02:12):
I don't but it is what it is like, it's
a very natural thing.
Speaker 2 (02:16):
I don't call it. I don't call it varting. It
is whatever cleef anyway, and besides, it works for the story.
It's not a varting confession. It's a kleef confection. Thank you,
thank you, even though spelled completely different.
Speaker 1 (02:35):
Anyway, I was reading where this woman was talking about
she was making her quief confession, and she was talking
about how the.
Speaker 2 (02:45):
It was it happened, right, it happened.
Speaker 1 (02:48):
And she said that she oh the other the other
thing that she said true true or false?
Speaker 2 (02:54):
Christy, you can't even feel it coming on.
Speaker 3 (03:01):
I guess true. I guess true.
Speaker 1 (03:03):
Right, So that that that almost makes sense. Well you go,
you go ahead.
Speaker 3 (03:10):
Well, I just I mean there's different times. Sometimes you
can feel it, sometimes you can't. I don't know, I
don't know. That was a hard one.
Speaker 1 (03:18):
They she was saying, which would make sense. She said
that you can't feel unlike unlike a regular too, you
can't like you can feel that coming on, and that
you can choke it back.
Speaker 2 (03:30):
That with a queef, you can't. You can't feel Tyler.
Speaker 1 (03:34):
What do you I'm not gonna say with a bart
I'm not gonna say that.
Speaker 2 (03:38):
That makes me sound like a child.
Speaker 5 (03:40):
Somebody, Well, then you're not gonna love this one. Somebody
suggested the who ha harmonica.
Speaker 6 (03:50):
God anyway, but this woman was saying in her confession
that you can't feel it coming on, forgive me father.
Speaker 1 (04:01):
Therefore there four you can't choke it back because you
don't know it's coming so out of like out of nowhere,
everything's good.
Speaker 2 (04:11):
And then there goes the ho ha harmonica.
Speaker 4 (04:19):
So what do are you left to do? Cough the well, no,
I mean, you just.
Speaker 2 (04:23):
Go with it.
Speaker 5 (04:24):
Also, Christy, that seems like, what are you supposed to
do bold move just to go with it.
Speaker 2 (04:29):
What are you supposed to do? You don't know what's
coming next? Thing? I mean, you do you address it?
Speaker 7 (04:34):
You hope for lightning flash or lightning fast reflexes.
Speaker 2 (04:38):
The no no no, but like Christy. Oh.
Speaker 1 (04:41):
The other thing, the other part of this true false
is it is it most common? I mean, when you
think of common sexual positions, is it most common with
with with with doggy?
Speaker 4 (04:54):
Oh? My god?
Speaker 2 (04:55):
What is win?
Speaker 4 (04:56):
Can we be a dog aggressive?
Speaker 2 (04:58):
Please put us off the school bus? No? No, no,
But I mean we're adults, we're adults. Yes or no?
Speaker 3 (05:10):
I guess I guess I'd have to answer yes.
Speaker 2 (05:12):
Right right. And that was part of this woman's confession.
Speaker 1 (05:16):
Is that she she and she and a partner, and
they'd only been together for a little while, and that
they were they were getting intimate. I don't know if
it was the first time they were intimate, excuse me,
but it was early on in the relationship. And she
said that they were they were they were being intimate
with each other, and that that they were they were
(05:38):
they were doing doggie And next thing you know, there's
there's chief grief in the bedroom. But the whole thing
was is that she had to like, so, yes, you
have to you have to address it right, Like you
can't pretend it didn't happen.
Speaker 5 (06:02):
I feel like a partner, if they're sensitive to what
may be an embarrassing moment, would just let it go.
Speaker 1 (06:09):
This well, this woman in her confession said they had
been having Diane, they had been having Doggie right, and
they had kind of wrap that up and he was
getting ready to do something to her and and wrong moment.
(06:30):
Who ha, Harmonica got it right. So they had to
address it. And so she was like, I'll just I'm
going to go to the restroom, not because she had
done anything wrong, but she was like, hey, sorry, and
he was like, yeah, you know what, no big deal.
But she said, now I've had this but out of
the backside where she said Diane in her confession, her
CUEF confession.
Speaker 2 (06:51):
Every step was like.
Speaker 1 (06:58):
She said, she said, it was like having a bagpipe
betrayed her legs.
Speaker 2 (07:08):
She said, with like it was choreographed with every step.
Every step she said.
Speaker 1 (07:13):
It was like a kid's whoopie cushion that somebody was
like as she would take a step, they'd push on
it and push on it and push on it, but
it happens. And the whole point, the whole point of
what I was reading was you can't let that get
in the way. Even though this poor woman said she
went and sat on the toilet for what felt like
an hour.
Speaker 2 (07:32):
Just kind of deflating, if you will.
Speaker 1 (07:39):
But but I do think the well number one I
learned that you can't feel it coming on. I had
no idea, although Christy you said sometimes you can.
Speaker 3 (07:50):
It depends on the position that you're in. I think
sometimes you can feel it sometimes. But it's not like
you don't feel it like you feel a fart. You
just know something going.
Speaker 2 (08:01):
On, right. I hear you, I hear you. Do you
address it like it's happened to you?
Speaker 1 (08:06):
Of course with a partner, do you address it or
you just kind of pretend like nobody heard that?
Speaker 3 (08:15):
Uh no, My husband and I have a little giggle.
Speaker 2 (08:18):
Yeah, okay, all right, yeah, very good, very good. You
ever get it where it's sync to your walking the
soundtrack to the bathroom? All right, very good? We're adults,
Why can't we be honest with each other?
Speaker 5 (08:35):
Speaking of being adults, a DM has come in with
a suggestion for a synonym.
Speaker 4 (08:41):
Oh, yes, a bagoon burp.
Speaker 2 (08:45):
That's funny, that's cute.
Speaker 5 (08:47):
I think I found this piece. Uh and you did
a pretty good job. Recounting her confession, Oh yes, yeah,
thank you.
Speaker 4 (08:59):
She referred to.
Speaker 5 (09:00):
The original moment though as rattling the windows.
Speaker 4 (09:05):
Damn.
Speaker 5 (09:13):
But then, like you told us, as soon as I
sat up to head for the shower, another eruption occurred.
All I could do was go with it. Let that
air out of my tire. Every moment, every step was
like a sound check for a middle school band.
Speaker 2 (09:33):
But what are you supposed to do?
Speaker 1 (09:35):
And the answer is be an adult, get a giggle
for your magoomburb.
Speaker 2 (09:43):
I gotta get shirts printed up.
Speaker 5 (09:46):
Certainly, if you're you feel like the other party is
going to have fun with it as well.
Speaker 1 (09:51):
Right, But I think this one, this one was awkward
because it was so early in the relationship. But if
you're going, is the first time it happened in front
of a new partner?
Speaker 4 (10:02):
Yeah, of course?
Speaker 1 (10:03):
Okay, yeah, no, no, I would imagine it is like
I would have met, like how long have you and
Scott been married?
Speaker 4 (10:08):
Now to the twenty four years?
Speaker 1 (10:11):
Right, so now it's old hat, it's like nothing, no, no,
But like now, it wouldn't even matter, right, it would
be like whatever. Right, But if it were if God
forbids something happened and you were with a new man,
and the first time that happened, it would be it
would be it would well, no, no, it should not
be embarrassing, awkward, awkward, all right, it would be awkward.
Speaker 2 (10:31):
You shouldn't be embarrassed by it. No, no, you can't
help it. But if you've got you've got a kid's
marching band sound check in there.
Speaker 5 (10:40):
If if you've come across it before.
Speaker 4 (10:44):
Right, That's where I feel like it's sort of flat.
Speaker 5 (10:47):
In broadcasting, oftentimes we don't do this, but you're told
just to move on when some don't highlight it, right,
I feel like you could also be fine doing that.
Speaker 2 (10:58):
What just moving on?
Speaker 1 (11:00):
Yes, yes, but the first time it happens, yes, you're
supposed to move on.
Speaker 2 (11:05):
But you know, everybody is like, I heard the F bomb.
I heard it, I heard it, I heard it, I
heard it.
Speaker 4 (11:12):
Well, what does this mean? From your essays?
Speaker 5 (11:13):
Some people have a signature laugh, that's sort of what
you said, just giggle about it, right.
Speaker 4 (11:18):
Others have a signature dance move what is that?
Speaker 2 (11:23):
What is that?
Speaker 5 (11:26):
So is it to pretend as if like the move
you're following it up with caused it.
Speaker 2 (11:33):
I don't even know what does that look like?
Speaker 4 (11:37):
I don't know what I sure do I? And what
part of your body are you making this sound from
the no?
Speaker 5 (11:43):
No?
Speaker 2 (11:43):
But well what dance a mighty part.
Speaker 4 (11:49):
Play out the no?
Speaker 2 (11:51):
But you know what I mean?
Speaker 1 (11:52):
Like?
Speaker 2 (11:52):
What what what dance move of on my doing? Where
all of a sudden I queef?
Speaker 4 (11:58):
Maybe you just sort of shake your hips or something.
Speaker 2 (12:01):
Oh, I'm doing the twist.
Speaker 4 (12:05):
Now you're doing the trump trumpet?
Speaker 2 (12:12):
Where am I going line?
Speaker 8 (12:13):
To?
Speaker 2 (12:14):
Hi? Elliott in the morning?
Speaker 8 (12:17):
Hey, if you get shirts made, I'll definitely wear.
Speaker 1 (12:19):
One, yes, ma'am, Yes, ma'am.
Speaker 8 (12:25):
Yesterday at work I queezed and you can't hold it
back and you don't feel it coming on, but it
definitely there's like an air bubble that gets trapped between
your lips and if you like move your legs, it'll.
Speaker 2 (12:39):
Escape right right. Sure, But during sex.
Speaker 8 (12:44):
The first time that ever happened to me, I turned
around real quick and I was like, that wasn't a part,
that wasn't a fart, that wasn't a fart, But.
Speaker 9 (12:52):
Because it was so shocking.
Speaker 8 (12:54):
I stood up really quick and it really did shake
the window. It just made it so much worse. And
then you sit down on the toilet and it just
keeps coming.
Speaker 6 (13:07):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (13:07):
No, that's in my essay that I was reading.
Speaker 1 (13:10):
It does talk about even though it does talk about
how this woman got into the bathroom and she was like,
I just sat on the toilet and deflated.
Speaker 8 (13:18):
Yeah. It is embarrassing the first time, but after a
while it's like I don't even care.
Speaker 1 (13:23):
Yeah, exactly exactly. Hey, can I ask you this? Like,
were you audible at work yesterday? No?
Speaker 8 (13:33):
But you think it's going to be. I guess it
just depends if you have anise or oudies. But that
air bubble sometimes it feels really big and you just
it's like sometimes it's like a little pump.
Speaker 2 (13:45):
Right, yeah, and then sometimes it's like a lot bottoom.
All right, very good, very good. Thank you for your
Cleeve confession. Thank you man.
Speaker 4 (13:53):
That is not a new segment.
Speaker 1 (13:58):
Line.
Speaker 2 (14:00):
Hi Elliott in the morning.
Speaker 9 (14:02):
Hey, how's it going?
Speaker 1 (14:03):
Does this mean?
Speaker 2 (14:04):
Yeah?
Speaker 1 (14:04):
Hi?
Speaker 2 (14:04):
Who's this? Hey?
Speaker 3 (14:06):
I'm in Arlington.
Speaker 9 (14:07):
I'm a certified queen specialist.
Speaker 2 (14:09):
Like you're awesome at it, Like you got a diploma.
Speaker 9 (14:13):
Yeah, totally certified, bonded, license and insured.
Speaker 3 (14:17):
I was gonna say, so, it does.
Speaker 9 (14:19):
It does depend on the uh, the position. Like for instance,
if you remember back in the day when you would
do the bicycle, you'd be on your back and you
put your legs in the in the air and you
can like the exercise like yeah, yeah, that is for
most people. I would imagine if it's like, uh, like
air has to be able to get in there. There
(14:39):
should be no grief in a quief, and I.
Speaker 1 (14:42):
Don't, by the way, update the shirts, update the shirts.
Speaker 2 (14:47):
There's no grief in a queaf. Now that's good. By
the way, are you are you? Are you really some
kind of doctor?
Speaker 9 (14:53):
No, but I did. I did procure your mustard skittles
for you, so we have that.
Speaker 2 (14:58):
Oh, excellent, excellent. I thought you sounded familiar.
Speaker 9 (15:03):
There's no grief in a quief and I and they're
just you know, they're fun little biological party favors. And
I think that if you're with somebody and you're having sexism,
you guys should be able to farts equal funny, all
parts equal funny, right, amen, amen.
Speaker 2 (15:20):
I listen. I couldn't agree more. I couldn't agree.
Speaker 9 (15:22):
No grief in a quief.
Speaker 2 (15:24):
Amen, Thank you, ma'am, thank you.
Speaker 9 (15:26):
I have a great thing.
Speaker 2 (15:27):
You have the same.
Speaker 5 (15:28):
Now, remember it was a week or two ago somebody
brought up tilted uteruses.
Speaker 2 (15:37):
That does sound familiar. That does sound familiar. I don't
remember what we were talking about, but that does sound familiar.
Speaker 5 (15:45):
But we were just sent a note explaining that although
you may be able to work on the pelvic floor
and your strengthening of your core, people with the retroverted
or tilted uterus they struggle with this a lot.
Speaker 2 (16:01):
Can't help, no kidding apparently, so oh put that on
your dating profile. Hey, but no grief right now, No
zero zero grief. By the way, all parts are funny.
Line too. You know what she said though, she said,
it's like a little party favor. You know what that
(16:22):
reminds me of, Tyler.
Speaker 1 (16:24):
Remember when you went to that that cuddle party.
Speaker 2 (16:27):
Yes, and they were.
Speaker 1 (16:28):
Like, if anybody gets a boner, that's just that's just
up exactly exactly.
Speaker 4 (16:36):
Weird.
Speaker 2 (16:41):
Am I going to line too? I could do that.
Hi Elliott the morning. Yeah, Hi, who's this?
Speaker 1 (16:49):
Hey? This is Toyer from Houston.
Speaker 2 (16:52):
Oh, yes, how are you?
Speaker 6 (16:54):
Hey?
Speaker 9 (16:55):
I'm calling to let you know that.
Speaker 2 (16:58):
Wait, I'm sorry. All I'm hearing is I'm sorry, sorry, sorry,
I was, I was.
Speaker 1 (17:05):
I was calling to let you know that I can
queep on command the okay, ma'am, No, no, no, no, no,
what a skill though.
Speaker 9 (17:17):
Yeah, yeah, the first time I happened with me and
my partner, I told.
Speaker 2 (17:21):
Them, Okay, all right, very very good, Thank you, ma'am.
Thank you. Can I'm sure your ways needs you.
Speaker 5 (17:33):
I should I read the name for this. I guess
I can because it is public. Maybe I'll read the
message first and then I will tell you who sent it. Okay,
these are the segments I desperately want to call in for,
but I have a job and use my full name
on here.
Speaker 2 (17:52):
On here, oh on here.
Speaker 4 (17:56):
On this program.
Speaker 2 (17:57):
Oh Aaron M. Barlow. By the way, that's her sound.
Speaker 7 (18:06):
As she as she walks to the bathroom, sit on the.
Speaker 2 (18:18):
Kimmode, and.
Speaker 4 (18:25):
I think I have audio of that under press. Those
are the monkey yodels.
Speaker 2 (18:39):
That's not what I want the well, I mean, but
she could call in.
Speaker 4 (18:44):
She's saying she can't.
Speaker 1 (18:46):
Why why what is having a job have to do
with any of it?
Speaker 2 (18:49):
I'm being serious, What would that have to do with
any of it. That doesn't make any sense to me?
Speaker 4 (18:55):
Is it the demonstration? You just.
Speaker 2 (19:01):
Be right out.
Speaker 1 (19:07):
No, no, But but honestly she shouldn't that. I have
a problem with that. I have a problem with that.
Speaker 4 (19:14):
Well she's not saying you do, but she's saying her But.
Speaker 2 (19:18):
Why would but why would her employer.
Speaker 1 (19:21):
Like think of think of like who are who are
women in management?
Speaker 2 (19:25):
Here? Yvonne done it, Liz Handler done it? No, you
know what I mean. They've all queethed. Oh they have.
I'm going to refrain from asking them later.
Speaker 4 (19:38):
I mean, a good idea
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