Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
Somebody sent me an article after hearing you love the
Chris Isaac Fart. I don't know if anybody. We're not
going to find anybody who has one of these as
some people have very fancy toilets like.
Speaker 2 (00:16):
That dude Martin.
Speaker 1 (00:17):
His girlfriend's mom has the seed heater and the bidet,
And I don't know if somebody has been to Japan
and use one of these.
Speaker 2 (00:28):
The company is Toto. They're big in the toilet business.
Speaker 3 (00:32):
We've talked about them.
Speaker 1 (00:33):
Yeah, so the company that's doing this, and now they're
going to start showing up and they think that this
will be like bidets became a big thing, right, and
that kind of came out of Japan where everybody and
all the toilets are bidets. So the new thing in Japan, Well,
I say new, this has been going on for a
handful of years, and maybe somebody has traveled to.
Speaker 2 (00:55):
Japan and can't explain it. There are toilets that play
sounds to mask your sound.
Speaker 4 (01:08):
So we've heard of apps existing.
Speaker 2 (01:11):
Yeah that's on your phone.
Speaker 4 (01:12):
Yeah that just like say a public bathroom at work, right,
and you hated that because wasn't it the sound of
like a fan? And you wondered, well, won't the person
in the stall next to you know there's no fan
inside the other stall?
Speaker 2 (01:28):
Yeah, you don't need that. So Toto was like, no.
Speaker 3 (01:32):
So it's not like a white noise thing.
Speaker 2 (01:34):
The can I can I also? No? No, no, no
no no.
Speaker 1 (01:37):
No, can I also can I also something I'd written
in the article? And if I don't get it off
my chest, it's just gonna bother me. Like they they
talk about how some people will do a courtesy flush
to drown the sound. Courtesy flush is not to drown
the sound, like I don't flush if I'm gonna rip.
Speaker 4 (01:58):
But that is how those apps came up because it
was an article about somebody hating that their coworker just
kept flushing while they sat on the toilet to drown
out the sound.
Speaker 2 (02:10):
Yes, and somebody called.
Speaker 4 (02:11):
In there a couple of people mentioned that there are
these app stores.
Speaker 1 (02:15):
Okay, and that's fine, and maybe that person is doing that, yeah, flushing,
but that don't call it a courtesy flush.
Speaker 2 (02:22):
A courtesy flush is not to drown the sound.
Speaker 1 (02:25):
A courtesy flush is to get rid of the doochie
and the smelt as best you can. Right, that's a
courtesy flush, but a courtesy flush is not. So you
don't hear me tooting or whatever I'm doing in there.
Speaker 5 (02:38):
I can hear Christen laughing anyway. Interestingly enough, I had
asked her. I was like, hey, did you get your
Spotify rap yet She's like, oh.
Speaker 3 (02:45):
Yeah, I missed your text. I was dropping the kids
off at the pool.
Speaker 5 (02:53):
It's like you could have stopped with I missed your text.
Speaker 1 (02:59):
Now in christ during a commercial break, yeah, oh she's quick.
Speaker 2 (03:06):
Also, Kristen doesn't.
Speaker 1 (03:07):
Wipe however, so but but instead Toto is creating a
toilet like much how like I don't know what their
toilets look like, with bidets and stuff like that. But
some of them are like they're they're a push button
(03:28):
on these. You create sounds, so they'll go in there
and it'll be the sound and listen, somebody still knows
you're in there, going it's okay. But some of them
will have like nature sounds. Some of them will have
like like almost.
Speaker 6 (03:46):
Like yeah, like a like a like a buy a
babbling brook, Yeah I'm in the jungle, like they.
Speaker 2 (03:58):
Like this would cover everything.
Speaker 4 (04:11):
Well, you've turned up the volume on your machine. I
can do that to mine. I forgot to hit repeat.
So anyway, you should just start saying it.
Speaker 1 (04:38):
So Toto is making these toilets now that have and
they think this is the this is the next waves
the future, yes, where it is a babbling brook like
I the only other way I know how to describe
it as like massage music.
Speaker 4 (04:53):
I was sort of like new age exactly.
Speaker 5 (04:56):
Yeah, and are these going to be in your like
in your house?
Speaker 4 (05:04):
This isn't like for public restrooms.
Speaker 2 (05:06):
They showed a woman, what is your name, Taka, I
gotta find your name? Oh, Sukasa Matsuyama. She works in
Toto's faucets and appliances. She says that.
Speaker 4 (05:27):
This is a plane taking off.
Speaker 2 (05:45):
Huh oh doll.
Speaker 4 (05:51):
Quick, no, no, no other one.
Speaker 1 (05:55):
So anyway they're finding that the So they said that
I don't know if this is true or not, but
like are I'm just gonna you're horrible, Diane because you
don't ever go here?
Speaker 2 (06:08):
But will you if you if you ever go here?
Or do you find women here?
Speaker 1 (06:14):
Are they are they apprehensive to make a noise if
they're in there?
Speaker 5 (06:19):
Well you would imagine everybody seems to know every bathroom
coat on every floor in this building.
Speaker 3 (06:24):
Yeah, probably for that reason.
Speaker 2 (06:25):
Oh see, I don't think it's for sound.
Speaker 1 (06:29):
I just think it is just to if I can
crap where somebody else doesn't have to come in here
and feel like, you know, they're they're they're breathing in
the rainforest.
Speaker 2 (06:39):
Why not? Why not go somewhere else. I don't think
it's a sound thing.
Speaker 1 (06:43):
I'm not embarrassed by making Oh I thought you cute, right,
I'm not embarrassed about making a noise. But I go
to another floor.
Speaker 4 (06:55):
So far the three we test it aren't working. What
do you mean the jet engine? But you could still
hear what was going on.
Speaker 2 (07:02):
Oh yeah, well Toto needs to turn up the volume.
Speaker 5 (07:08):
So now we have a cocktail party.
Speaker 2 (07:15):
Someone dump it in the middle of our party. Anyway,
that seconds. But do they do they? Do you find
women try to mask sound?
Speaker 3 (07:25):
Yes?
Speaker 7 (07:27):
Do you?
Speaker 3 (07:29):
It told you it's it's got to be an emergency
for me to go on.
Speaker 2 (07:32):
I understand that. But if if you were in there,
if you were in there, okay, and I'm not I'm
not trying to be gross. I'm trying to be very serious.
Speaker 1 (07:39):
Actually, if you were in there and you don't know
who's coming in, it could be Yvonne it could be Liz,
it could be it could be Alice, it could be anybody.
Would you, and again I'm just using real terms, would
you choke back of fart before they left, like hold
(08:00):
it until they left?
Speaker 2 (08:02):
Would you, really, Kristen? Would you?
Speaker 8 (08:05):
Hell?
Speaker 4 (08:05):
No, I expect that from her.
Speaker 1 (08:10):
Would you if you knew that you were going to
be splattery?
Speaker 2 (08:19):
Would you clench until the bathroom was empty?
Speaker 3 (08:23):
Of course? So this is I would be holding on
by my nails.
Speaker 2 (08:27):
So this is this is perfect for you. Where if
you no, I'm.
Speaker 5 (08:32):
Asking, well, if you the examples we've we've heard so
far don't sound like they're fool proof.
Speaker 4 (08:43):
I have a gunfire, I'm.
Speaker 3 (08:44):
Just streaming the platoon.
Speaker 1 (08:50):
The what if that's how your pellets came out? This
would be perfect for you because no, no, I'm being serious.
Where you could go in and they showed the woman
in the.
Speaker 2 (09:00):
In in like the the is it like the demo?
Speaker 1 (09:04):
Yeah, she goes into the bathroom and she pushes a
button on the wall and you get like you get
like like nature.
Speaker 4 (09:14):
This isn't like on the toilet connected to the toilet.
Speaker 1 (09:17):
No, no, no, no, well it's like the one that
they show is really fancy.
Speaker 2 (09:22):
So it's on the.
Speaker 4 (09:22):
Walls in the showroom.
Speaker 1 (09:24):
Yeah, but you can also get them where the princess
the No, but you can also get where it's like
on the side of the toilet.
Speaker 2 (09:33):
Almost like where the like a like a control panel is.
Speaker 1 (09:38):
And by the way, they say masking movement goes all
the way back to like when.
Speaker 2 (09:44):
Like pre plumbing, like when it was just a hole
in the ground.
Speaker 1 (09:51):
That masking goes back to then that people because a
lot of the bathrooms were made out of metal and
or like yeah, like tan, and people would bang on
the walls so you.
Speaker 2 (10:02):
Couldn't hear them cutting ass. Is it less like to me,
that's a giveaway.
Speaker 4 (10:09):
Is it less about just sort of silencing the act
and more about respect because we are talking about technology
you're seeing in Asia?
Speaker 2 (10:23):
Correct?
Speaker 4 (10:23):
Could it be cultural? Yesterday we learned that voice notes
and voice memos very hispanic. Is this not so much
that you are trying to convince people you're not doing it,
but more about convincing people that you respect them as
fellow users of them, so.
Speaker 2 (10:44):
They should have to hear it. So it's kind of
two birds one stone. Because if you're sitting in a stall,
people know you're dumping.
Speaker 4 (10:53):
I mean, I guess not always.
Speaker 1 (10:55):
You don't have to be no, but you're gonna there's
the possibility you can make a noise.
Speaker 4 (10:59):
Yes, oh yeah, you could make a noise and not
even be doing number two?
Speaker 2 (11:06):
What what noise? Or the sound of urine hitting water?
Speaker 4 (11:09):
I do hate that as well, But that's actually one
of the choices I think to mask the dump. Do
you care?
Speaker 2 (11:15):
Do you care if somebody hears you piss?
Speaker 3 (11:18):
No?
Speaker 2 (11:18):
No, really, that doesn't bother you at all?
Speaker 1 (11:21):
Really, No, So you have no problem sitting in there
just streaming away.
Speaker 2 (11:26):
No, it's hitting splash. No, that's Diane's done. I love that.
Speaker 4 (11:38):
Why is she not inolved in this conversation? She's screaming
at the window.
Speaker 1 (11:43):
Paragraph Wait, Kristen, turn yourself on. And I've got so
many people on hold what I don't even know what
you're what are you yelling about?
Speaker 8 (11:53):
That?
Speaker 9 (11:54):
Diane and I when we go pee together, we talk
while we're both peeing together.
Speaker 2 (11:57):
Yeah, right, okay, just have a carry on conversation. Right,
And can you hear Diane going yeah, yeah? And can
you hear Christian going yeah? Do you guys go the same?
Speaker 1 (12:07):
No?
Speaker 2 (12:07):
But do you guys go the same amount of time?
Is it a chorus of at the end?
Speaker 5 (12:15):
Every once in a while during the show, we end
up in the same we end up in the bathroom
at the same time.
Speaker 2 (12:19):
Yes or no question? Yes or no question?
Speaker 1 (12:23):
And I'm going to I'm don't answer right away. I'm
going to give the question. Then I'm going to count
to three. Okay, and let's try to go one, two, three,
and then you answer. Okay, have either of you heard
the other one fart in the bathroom?
Speaker 2 (12:43):
One? Two three? Now? Wow, that's crazy? Am I the
only one on the show that you've heard fart?
Speaker 3 (12:52):
I've come close probably thousands of times.
Speaker 4 (12:57):
So you you will not wood next to her?
Speaker 9 (13:04):
No, because normally when we pee together, I've either already
dumped or I'll go later, go later. Right today, it
was what time was?
Speaker 4 (13:13):
That is what I am talking about. You didn't need
to reveal all that.
Speaker 3 (13:17):
You said.
Speaker 4 (13:18):
No, No, I haven't gotten spotify that. No, I haven't
done that.
Speaker 9 (13:25):
I felt bad for not responding right away.
Speaker 2 (13:27):
But would you feel But you wouldn't care if you
heard Diane too?
Speaker 9 (13:31):
No, because I know she does.
Speaker 2 (13:33):
Everybody does exactly. Would you, Diane? Would you be would
you be like young lady Kristen. If you heard Kristin rip, well, was.
Speaker 3 (13:42):
She doing it on purpose?
Speaker 4 (13:45):
Bathroom? I wouldn't.
Speaker 3 (13:47):
I wouldn't say anything she. I mean, she could imagine that.
Speaker 2 (13:49):
Until you got back in here, like, oh my god.
Speaker 4 (13:55):
Well, I don't know if we're going to find it
to be so unreal.
Speaker 1 (14:01):
But that's all I'm saying is it's not a big deal.
It's not a big deal. But I think maybe maybe
Tyler is right in that it is. Yes, it's it's
it's to mask, but it's also to respect.
Speaker 2 (14:16):
And you may be right about.
Speaker 4 (14:18):
That, because are these popping up?
Speaker 2 (14:21):
Do they have?
Speaker 4 (14:22):
You guys have been over to Japan.
Speaker 2 (14:24):
We were there for thirty hours.
Speaker 4 (14:26):
But did you use a public restroom?
Speaker 2 (14:29):
Yeah?
Speaker 1 (14:29):
I used bathroom at the stadium when we went to
the actually both stadiums, I used the although I only
peed at the baseball game, and I definitely peed at
the at the at the football game when the Commanders
played the forty nine Ers.
Speaker 4 (14:46):
And I know it was years ago, but I didn't.
Speaker 2 (14:49):
I don't think. I don't think I had.
Speaker 1 (14:50):
A bowel movement at the stadiums, but I definitely dumped
in my hotel room.
Speaker 4 (14:54):
But are these fancy toilets seen in those spaces and
not just in homes.
Speaker 2 (15:02):
I don't. I didn't go into a stall.
Speaker 5 (15:04):
Maybe in like I know, in the hotel public like
the lobby bathrooms. Maybe not in the because of cars.
Speaker 2 (15:10):
Our hotel had nice, nice bathrooms.
Speaker 1 (15:12):
And the only reason I remember that is the night
we landed, I got a bad migraine and I threw
up in the toilet and I remember looking at it
and going like, that's a bigger remote than I have
at home for a TV.
Speaker 2 (15:24):
But I didn't use any of the things on there,
because if.
Speaker 4 (15:27):
You are putting these or already have these sound effects
in a public setting, you're not going to know who's
in there. It's funny to you to imagine someone trying
to pull this off.
Speaker 2 (15:40):
Here, Caruso, go in there and dump yesterday.
Speaker 4 (15:42):
And then you're gonna run in and tell us, Hey,
Caruso is trying to pretend like a car is a
car peeling out, But you can't.
Speaker 1 (16:01):
Yeah, you wouldn't know the person if it was a stranger.
The lobby of a of an office building.
Speaker 3 (16:06):
You're memorizing shoes.
Speaker 2 (16:07):
I do you had on brown shoes yesterday? You had
brown toilet And.
Speaker 4 (16:11):
Is it all sound effects?
Speaker 2 (16:13):
What do you mean? No, No, I told you, well
yours are.
Speaker 1 (16:16):
No.
Speaker 2 (16:16):
They have like massage.
Speaker 1 (16:18):
Music, they have like like they do have like outdoor sounds.
They have like now they're trying to get creative where
like they they're they're making it so you can upload
your own sounds.
Speaker 4 (16:30):
But but like, how about classical music, especially the percussion
sections like the timpan. Yeah, stuff like that that would
almost naturally work better than again an automobile.
Speaker 2 (16:42):
Wait, so I now have to hold it and go to.
Speaker 4 (16:56):
The sound effects just more amusing to the Well, they're
funnier to me. The ducks would be funny.
Speaker 2 (17:05):
That's how I walked in here. Hi Ellie had the morning.
Oh wait, hold on one second, I hit the wrong
button there, hi Elli had the Morning?
Speaker 10 (17:18):
Hell, yeah, this is Brandon. Can you hear me?
Speaker 5 (17:19):
Yeah?
Speaker 2 (17:19):
I got you. Who's this? This is Brandon?
Speaker 10 (17:22):
You sent me to South Africa? Was running nervous about
twenty years ago. So great to talk to you guys again.
Speaker 2 (17:27):
Nice to talk to you. It's been twenty years. What
can I do for you, sir?
Speaker 10 (17:31):
Really? As a matter of fact, I'm living in Japan
right now, and if you guys are a bidet curious.
You guys have to get one to the office because
they will change your life.
Speaker 2 (17:40):
Okay, amazing, So listen.
Speaker 1 (17:42):
So, like the bidet revolution has taken over the US,
not to the extent in Japan, but people are very
very aware of and the people that have them pressing
the benefits of the bidet. Are you hip to like
this whole sound generator now that they're that they're using
on toilets there.
Speaker 10 (18:03):
Yes, they've been using them for years and they are
usually built into the remote control so uh, you know,
Japan's so focused on culture and respect and manners, so
they don't want to sound. They don't want to have
any sounds leak out of their bathroom stalls and interfere
with whatever someone else is doing next to you. So
they usually have the babbling brooks that you guys were
talking about, or you know, some nature sounds, and you
(18:25):
can add there's a volume on it too, so you
can go up and down depending on your your preference,
and or you just turn it off moment. You find
them a lot, Yeah, you can find them a lot
of times in like public restroomshere, there's multiple stalls, not
usually those single places.
Speaker 1 (18:41):
Yeah, right, like a like a one header wouldn't so,
so Tyler's right that it really is it? Well, yes,
it may mask it's also respect for other people totally.
Speaker 10 (18:52):
Yeah, it's a lot about respect.
Speaker 1 (18:55):
Do Like if you went into like an office building
in in Japan where you are, like you would not
hear somebody in the bathroom, you know, having their morning
dump in tooting like crazy.
Speaker 10 (19:12):
Well, most people would have those sounds built. In my
wife's office, there's multiple stalls and they all have those
sounds too. And there's even more than that too. There's
even there's sounds that generally because there's there's machines that
suck the smell out too, and it's amazing. So that
also generates a bit of a hum. So there's it's
trying and keep it as discreet as possible. It's it's
(19:33):
quite wild.
Speaker 1 (19:33):
Hey, can I ask you that like here in America,
we've got the fart fan, right that you that's like
the fan in the bathroom, do you guys, but you're
telling me there there's almost like a vacuum that's inside
the bowl that sucks the smell.
Speaker 10 (19:46):
Absolutely yeah. And some of the higher end toilets so
Toto has a twenty five thousand dollars toilet, and you
know most torotes about three hundred bucks. Twenty five thousand,
and the thing opens and closes for you. It knows
when you get and off if flushes. It actually sterilizes
a bowl with u V lights. It has these two
rods that clean themselves.
Speaker 1 (20:06):
By the way, for twenty five bucks, were twenty five grand.
It also better wipe me, dad me, do everything and.
Speaker 10 (20:14):
Give me a little extra, you know, a little low
happy ending.
Speaker 1 (20:16):
At the end of yeah, reach around. I want as
long as we're going, let's go, I want you. I
want a toilet with a with a with a smell sucker.
Speaker 8 (20:27):
Yeah.
Speaker 10 (20:27):
Yeah, they're and they're in the bowls like you said,
they're fantastic because you know, the ones in the US
are usually like the exhaust fans that do anything from
humidity to just general sound. These are built into the
toilet at your office, Yeah yeah, yeah.
Speaker 2 (20:40):
At your office. Do you guys have the sound the
sound toilets we do?
Speaker 10 (20:45):
We do in this volume controls on it too. It's
either on and off and you can change how much
do you do. The ones we have are babbling brooks,
so they kind of emulate that sound of the water, right, So, uh,
it's it's it's pretty pretty easy.
Speaker 2 (20:57):
Can I ask you this?
Speaker 1 (20:58):
And I'm being serious, if if if I were in
a business setting there and I farted out loud with
people there like with like honestly, would people be like
you're you're the most disrespectful person I've ever met.
Speaker 10 (21:12):
You wouldn't have to commit suicide. Your life would be done?
Speaker 2 (21:19):
All right? Very good? Hey, how long? How long have
you lived in Japan? You say three years?
Speaker 10 (21:24):
Well, we're gonna be here for three more years. We've
been here and we've been tourists for a few half
a dozen times before we came, and we're working with
the government, US government, so we'll be here for another
three more years.
Speaker 1 (21:34):
Good for you, Good for you. Hey, I appreciate the
phone call. I'll talk to you in twenty years, ab
you got it, talk to you later.
Speaker 2 (21:40):
That's amazing. That is amazing.
Speaker 4 (21:43):
That sounds like you better start conducting, Elliott, how do
we turn out Kristen's laughing.
Speaker 1 (22:05):
I would also stand in the bathroom and go turn
the volume off.
Speaker 2 (22:20):
Could you imagine if you could control it like that?
It would be amazing? Where am I going Christian line.
Speaker 4 (22:26):
Somebody else has said they are fans of Beethove.
Speaker 2 (22:29):
The Oh really, why can't I even think? Now? This
is stuck in my head.
Speaker 7 (22:41):
Too quiet, Diane's done?
Speaker 4 (22:55):
And then Ian wrote Chicago Bulls starting lineup.
Speaker 2 (23:08):
That'd be a good one. My turns would feel so seen.
Now where am I going?
Speaker 10 (23:25):
Christen?
Speaker 8 (23:26):
Like four.
Speaker 2 (23:29):
Hi, elliot in the morning, That's where I would have
had together.
Speaker 6 (23:34):
Hi?
Speaker 2 (23:34):
Who's this?
Speaker 8 (23:38):
Hi? This is right?
Speaker 2 (23:39):
Oh yeah, what can I do for you? Sir?
Speaker 8 (23:43):
Yeah?
Speaker 11 (23:43):
So like I was in I was in South Korea,
like with the Army twenty eleven and twenty nineteen. So
like Korean's like they're not I mean they use videos too,
like here and there, like in some places like Japan,
I must be different than the other guy. Like I couldn't.
I couldn't get into it, Like I tried two different times.
It's just just not for me. But but like what
(24:05):
you guys are saying about, like them playing sounds, We're
just one that I think I ever heard was at
some movie theater and it was playing Twinkle Twinkle, Little Star.
Speaker 2 (24:18):
But that.
Speaker 11 (24:27):
Period and it and just starts playing.
Speaker 1 (24:33):
Yet he did your toilet have the did your toilet
have the smell.
Speaker 11 (24:38):
Sucker that I don't remember. I don't think it did.
Speaker 1 (24:41):
Oh wow wow the and that was just like a
regular public movie theater.
Speaker 11 (24:47):
Yes, yeah, wow, I want I want to I want
to say it this Starfield co X, but I don't
know that's the that's the like, that's they're kind of fame.
Is like they're the second or third largest underground mall
oh that's cool.
Speaker 2 (24:59):
That cool.
Speaker 1 (25:00):
By the way, tell you will you do me a
favorite Wrighttown movie theaters real quick?
Speaker 2 (25:03):
All right, all right, very good, thank you, sir, Thank you.
I don't like this one.
Speaker 4 (25:11):
It's just a understory.
Speaker 1 (25:13):
Yeah, but that doesn't like I don't feel like I'm
going how about this?
Speaker 4 (25:19):
Yeah, now I'm going outside. Well that's what the Japanese
you're a.
Speaker 7 (25:30):
Lot of.
Speaker 4 (25:36):
That would be like your your name.
Speaker 2 (25:40):
Whoop seagull, Hi Elliott in the morning. Yeah, Hi, who's as.
Speaker 8 (25:52):
Oh Anthony from Richman a Plumber. Yes, sir, I've actually
put in one of those toilets about three months ago
for some rich guy and an investment banker that lives
out in Polotan.
Speaker 1 (26:09):
And he got the one where it has like the
sounds built in and everything.
Speaker 8 (26:14):
Yeah, it looked like it had almost like an iPad mini.
It had a bracket that he had bolted to the toilet,
like be between the tank and the bowl, and it
would come up to the side to hold it, or
you can mount it in the wall. But the weirdest
part was it has this sensor on the bday that
when you hit it, it comes out and it will
(26:34):
sense where your hole is.
Speaker 2 (26:36):
Pray it.
Speaker 6 (26:40):
You know.
Speaker 8 (26:40):
It's like it's total taking pictures of people's but holes.
Sell him on the lawnline somewhere.
Speaker 1 (26:47):
I hope for the for the capital venturist or whatever
he is. I hope that you had to go, hey, Bud,
I just got.
Speaker 2 (26:54):
To try it out, make sure it's working. All right,
It's fine, it'll adjusted you have.
Speaker 8 (26:59):
If I wanted to try out, I used it, but
I wasn't. I wouldn't feel comfortable when it took a
picture of.
Speaker 11 (27:05):
My but hoole.
Speaker 2 (27:10):
All right, very good, very good, thank you, sir, thank you.
Speaker 1 (27:13):
And they said that this is yes, it started in
the far East, but they do believe much like the bidet,
it's coming our way.
Speaker 3 (27:22):
It's already in Palatan.
Speaker 2 (27:23):
It is