The Girlfriend

Jenny has some personal tea, we talk awful jobs, concert festivals, and marriage.

Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:00):
On the Minnesota Goodbye today. We'll get to emails in
a second, but right now, like I said, we get
to talk about things on the Minnesota Goodbye that we
don't talk about on the radio, So today is a
good example.

Speaker 2 (00:11):
So I, Jenny, have a sister named Rachel, and she's
married and she has a mother in law that I'm
going to be very honest, I am not a huge
fan of I have no issue with her like one
on one and stuff, but she does a lot of
things that I think are very selfish and frustrating, and
it pisses me off the things that she does to
my sister. But specifically this weekend felt a little bit

(00:32):
jabby towards me because I was back in Wisconsin this
past weekend and it had been planned for a while
that I would be back home. I have not been
home in like six months. I haven't seen my niece
and nephew, and my sister's mother in law texts last
minute Friday morning and saying they decided that they're going
to come for the weekend.

Speaker 1 (00:49):
Come to the same place you're going, okay.

Speaker 2 (00:51):
Which means then I have to split my time with
my niece and nephew, who I never forget to see
with her and her husband. And now the reason that
it's frustrating is because, yes, it is my nephew's birthday,
but they were supposed to be coming next weekend.

Speaker 3 (01:04):
And if anyone is.

Speaker 2 (01:05):
Listening that is like knows my brother in law, you
better turn this off right now, because I'm about to
reveal something. My sister is throwing a huge surprise surprise
birthday party for my brother in law next weekend. There's
fortieth and my sister said, please make your best effort
to come to this. Well, now the parents decided because
to be fair, there's a little backstory. They're farmers and

(01:26):
so if it rains, they can't do farming work. And
so this weekend it was raining, so it was easier
for them to come visit. But now they're not coming
next weekend, and they were like, she made all the
effort to be like, I really want all of his
family here for his big surprise fortieth.

Speaker 1 (01:40):
Yeah, and so she told her not coming next weekend.

Speaker 3 (01:43):
They're not coming.

Speaker 2 (01:44):
So my sister does devise a little bit of a
plan to make sure that I can have some time
with my niece and nephew, and she says that we're
going to go hiking with my niece and nephew after
the birthday party on Saturday, so that they know that
I get to have some time with them.

Speaker 3 (01:58):
And she kept bringing it up at.

Speaker 2 (02:01):
The birthday party. Yeah, oh, you guys are going hiking.
You guys are where are you gonna go hiking?

Speaker 3 (02:05):
Blah blah blah blah.

Speaker 2 (02:07):
Well then it comes around to the time of the
party ending and it's getting rainy and stormy and bad outside,
and so we decide not to go hiking. So her
and her husband go to a brewery with my brother
in law their kid, okay, and we just stay and
hang out at the house with the kids. They come
back like an hour and a half, two hours later.
So how was the hike, Maddie to my niece. Maddie's like, oh,

(02:30):
we just went on a walk, and my sister's like, yeah,
you know, I started raining and Maddie don't want to
be outside whatever. Okay, Luca comes back around, Luca, how
is the hike?

Speaker 3 (02:39):
Oh, so she's being a snot about it.

Speaker 2 (02:41):
In an absolute fucking bitch. Yeah, I never get to
see my niece and nephew. You are literally don't work.
You can go see them anytime you want. Now they
live in Iowa, so it's a long drive for them too,
But like they just saw them a few weeks ago,
they come to visit Moreton, I have not seen them
in six months.

Speaker 3 (03:00):
And it was like a surprise too. There on top
of it.

Speaker 2 (03:04):
She's lazy, she doesn't help, she's so mean to her husband.
She is just the epitome of someone who is so
selfish and everything's on her time and everyone's got to
help take care of her. And so I can get
along with her, but I just can't stand her, and
so I felt like it was a stab at me

(03:25):
with the hiking stuff, where it's like, dude, I haven't
seen them in six months, Like I care about spending
time with my niece and nephew, and you weren't supposed
to be here this weekend, So heaven forbid that my
sister has to go devise a plan to make sure
I get some time with my.

Speaker 3 (03:39):
Niece and nephew.

Speaker 2 (03:40):
And I will feel really fucking bad if anyone hears this,
that this gets back to.

Speaker 1 (03:44):
Them well and emailing in law at fundu lac dot com.

Speaker 2 (03:51):
Can you imagine showing up to a party where you know,
everyone's walking around helping set up chairs, and you're just
sitting on your ass the whole time.

Speaker 3 (04:00):
Ooh no, Like my mom and I are.

Speaker 2 (04:02):
Hop on our feet helping my sister with everything. Did
she get off her feet to help with a single thing?

Speaker 1 (04:08):
It never occurs to some people. I've witnessed this most
of my adult life. There are always the people who
pitch in, and there are always the people who are
oblivious to the idea that maybe they should stand up
and go, let me clear that table for you, let
me see those chairs up for you.

Speaker 2 (04:22):
Yeah, it's just it's crazy to ask you a question.

Speaker 1 (04:24):
Yeah, and I'm not attacking you, but but why you
wanted one on one time with your nephew?

Speaker 3 (04:32):
Yeah?

Speaker 1 (04:33):
So, in other words, you didn't want him to be
in the same room and you're playing legos and they're
you know, like you know, then they played with legos
or whatever, you know what I mean. So you wanted
one on one ginny nephew time.

Speaker 2 (04:43):
Yeah, okay, oh that's the question. Yeah, I just wanted
one on one time just with them. And like my
family and I already don't. We're just very different people,
So I don't want to hang out with people who
I don't enjoy hanging out with. On top of like
having to split the time with my niece and nephew
because I'm a nice person and I will be like, like,
I taught them this silly routine on the trampoline on

(05:04):
Friday night when I was hanging out with them. So
the next morning, when their grandma's there, the mother in law,
I go, hey, let's go show Grandma so and so
your routine, you know, like I get her involved in stuff.

Speaker 1 (05:15):
Sure, right, Okay, that's nice to do.

Speaker 2 (05:17):
Yeah, but like it's not reciprocated, you know, and I
don't know whatever. And you could argue that, like, oh, well,
maybe I should go home and see my niece and
nephew more often. I genuinely have not had a free
weekend to go back to Wisconsin. Yeah, since pretty much
the last time I was home.

Speaker 1 (05:32):
I get that. No, I get that. I think it's
great that you want to see your niece and nephew.
Niece also right, she's older, yep, yep, and he's great.
I think that. I also am always puzzled by people
who are just assholes. I just it's like, how hard
is it to be nice. How can you be so

(05:55):
unself aware of how you affect everybody and make everybody
so Uh? I don't know. Nobody in my family was
ever really like that, even Donna. Donna is probably the
most challenging person in my family, but she's also not selfish.
She's just annoying. Yeah, but I just don't nobody in

(06:16):
my family is like that, that they got to make
it all about them and how unhappy they are, yeah,
and what they got to do it their way?

Speaker 2 (06:22):
Yeah. I mean, nobody has ever been like that in
our family either, until I buried her husband.

Speaker 1 (06:29):
It's kind of like coworkers. You know, nearly all of
your co workers aren't going to be nice, wonderful people,
and then once in a while you'll have a coworker
that's just so mean and so self centered and manipulative
and narcissistic and bullying, and you just can't believe that.
Why why do you have to do that? Why did

(06:51):
you choose rather than to be nice, that you are
going to be mean to people?

Speaker 3 (06:57):
Yeah? I don't get it. I don't get it.

Speaker 4 (06:59):
I feel like the part is that you went to
go visit them and then they showed up and they're like.

Speaker 3 (07:03):
Us too, and you're like, what the hell? But I
was gonna come visit.

Speaker 2 (07:07):
Yeah, and now I don't know what I'm going to
do for my plans for the holidays because I used
to spend Thanksgiving with my axis family and we usually
did like Christmas with my family, and it always kind
of worked out because my sister would go to Iowa
for Thanksgiving, so like they would never really be around anyways.
But now they moved, her in laws moved into like
an apartment, so they can't host people anymore. So now

(07:27):
apparently they're probably coming to Wisconsin for Thanksgiving, and this
is my first Thanksgiving in a long time. We're like
I should go home and spend it with my family,
and I don't want to fucking spend it with her
in law.

Speaker 1 (07:38):
I think that's just the thing about family. Maybe it's
just like that's just.

Speaker 4 (07:42):
Always someone how it is always someone that you're like,
I don't care for this person, right.

Speaker 1 (07:46):
And it's like, you know what, I would love to
get time alone with blah blah blah, but so and
so is always going to be there.

Speaker 3 (07:53):
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (07:54):
It's kind of like there have been some marriages in
our family where nobody's ever been difficult, but it's like
I want to get with just you, my sister, not
you and your husband. Yeah. For example, all right, this
one says don't say a name, and it goes on
for a little bit here, So I'm gonna try to

(08:15):
sum it up. They're stuck in a job they don't like.
They thought they would like their new job. They don't
like it. I don't think it's the job for me,
but I don't want to quit because of difficult people.
Here we go with difficult people again. However, I did
take a minor pay cut, and I was struggling financially before,
and I'm struggling now. I feel like I'm working twice
as hard for less money. There are other roles out
there that pay way more, and I think I would

(08:36):
like more. I just don't want to be in the
same place next year where I feel super unsatisfied in
my career. I'm not even thirty yet, but I feel
like I need to be making more money to say,
for a wedding, kids, et cetera. Heck, I want to
be able to go out on a weekend and spend
a little money without feeling like it'll send me back.
I won't say your name. I almost did. You are
at an age where you can make mistakes and bounce

(08:59):
back from them. You are so young. I know you think,
oh my god, I'm almost thirty. I'm so old. It's
all relative. You are so much younger than you think
you are. Quit that job. Don't stay in a job
that makes you miserable. I remember when I took like
careers class when I was in high school. Yeah, the
teacher said, don't stay in a job that makes you miserable,
And that's probably the only thing. I think. I also

(09:21):
learned what a bullmarket and a bear market was. The
bull market is up, a bear market is down.

Speaker 3 (09:26):
Well, shoot, yeah, I didn't know that.

Speaker 1 (09:29):
Hum, but I'll never forget. She said, don't state a
job that makes you miserable. So there's my advice. Don't
state a job that makes you miserable.

Speaker 3 (09:38):
Yeah.

Speaker 4 (09:38):
Yeah, if you're not looking forward to go not that
you have to look forward to go into work, Like,
I totally get it. It's work, But if you are
dreading going into work, then you should leave that job period.

Speaker 3 (09:50):
I agree.

Speaker 2 (09:51):
I think that there's more to it, though, than just
being like, yeah, just quit your job.

Speaker 3 (09:55):
Okay, can you financially afford to do that?

Speaker 1 (09:57):
That's the good point.

Speaker 3 (09:57):
Yes, I was like, we'll start looking for one now.

Speaker 2 (10:00):
I have definitely been miserable in a job before, and
I couldn't do it until I had something else lined up,
Like I just couldn't.

Speaker 1 (10:07):
And that's smart. I think that's kind of smart. But yeah,
look for another job next one. Hello morning crew, Happy Monday, Jenny.
I agree, far Maide would have been an awesome show
to see in person.

Speaker 3 (10:16):
Yeah, I was gone.

Speaker 1 (10:18):
However, I think I'm too old to sit in bleachers
for ten hours, and I had to work anyway. But
I do have a few opinions to offer. Keep in mind,
it's music, so which is art, so it's all subjective.
I've been to well over one hundred shows in my time,
so I have a reputable background of form an opinion.
I saw Willie Nelson maybe twenty years ago, and I
didn't think he should have been performing anymore back then.

Speaker 2 (10:39):
Wow.

Speaker 1 (10:40):
I understand doing what you love keeps you young, but
at some point the product you produce isn't the same anymore.
I'll be curious to see how he does tonight. Oh
is he playing tonight?

Speaker 4 (10:51):
No?

Speaker 3 (10:52):
It was probably.

Speaker 1 (10:54):
Oh they say on Saturday, I see, I get it, Okay,
got it? Okay. Second, Bob Dylan is the only concert
I've ever walked out on. I love his music, but
he redid the musical arrangements for all the songs. Not
a single one was recognizable. I'm all for artistic license,
but I want to hear songs. I know you can
stream the entire show on YouTube. I'm watching Dave Matthews

(11:15):
and Tim Reynolds right now. That's really amazing because when
I saw I was at the iHeart Festival over the
weekend and every artist did a very authentic version of
their songs. Everybody did, and I think they probably knew
that's what people want, right and mass appeal.

Speaker 3 (11:35):
You got to appeal. I mean, especially at like iHeart
or a farm Maide well right festival.

Speaker 1 (11:40):
You know, look at somebody like Bob Dylan, who's been
in the business for sixty years and probably played lack
a Rolling Stone so many times that he hates that
song and he just cannot stand to do a weird,
weird the regular version, so he does a weird, weird
version and that's when you go, oh, this sucks. One

(12:00):
of the best parts of a show is when they're
kind of noodling around a little bit noodle noodle noodle.
Then they launch into the song and you recognize it, like,
oh my gosh. It's like, you know, like if you
go see the Eagles, for example, Yeah, and they're noodling
and then all of a sudden they go bad and
edit and d it and and dan and it, and

(12:23):
you go and you're like, oh my god, it's Hotel California.
But if they played a weird version on the lute.
They pull out a lute and they're playing Hotel California
on a fife and a loot, and you're like, what
the fuck? What is this?

Speaker 3 (12:41):
I came for the Eagles, gosh.

Speaker 4 (12:43):
And if you don't like playing the same song over
and over again, maybe you should stop touring.

Speaker 2 (12:47):
I do feel like that doesn't surprise me whatsoever about
Bob Dylan, after seeing the movie that was based off
of his life, he really fucking didn't care what anyone wanted.
It was all about like what he wanted, his artistic niss.

Speaker 1 (13:00):
But we saw John Fogerty at the iHeartRadio Music Festival,
and you might know who he is, but he's eighty
years old. He sounded a little bit older, but he
dyes his hair, so he looked probably sixty instead of eighty.
And but he sang his song so authentically, the same
version you've heard on the radio your whole life. And

(13:21):
left a good job in the city, working for the
man every night and day. And he sung that song
probably thousands of times, but it sounded just like it
does on the radio. I get a sneeze.

Speaker 3 (13:33):
Okay, all right, let it out, let me do it. Billy.
You and I had something in common. This weekend.

Speaker 2 (13:38):
You posted a video of your niece singing along to
K poppying Human Huster Hunters. My Nie started singing on
Friday a song, and I was like, I was like,
do you watch you love that? And she's like yeah.
I was like, all right, let's sing some songs together.
So hor and I like singing, except for I still
don't feel like I know.

Speaker 4 (13:55):
I don't know the world golden, he says.

Speaker 3 (14:00):
Almost three, and she knows all the words. I oh,
I don't know any of them. Most of them too.

Speaker 4 (14:05):
Yeah.

Speaker 3 (14:05):
My nephew was being a little shit and he wouldn't
let us watch it.

Speaker 2 (14:07):
He kept being like, no, I don't want to watch it,
and we're like, put it on, we want to watch it.

Speaker 4 (14:11):
If my niece gets mad if you sing along with her,
or if you sing it all so she'll be singing
and you'll sing along and she'll go Okay, We're like, geez,
I have to keep telling her like, let me enjoy
my life.

Speaker 1 (14:22):
Gosh, that kid is a pistol.

Speaker 3 (14:25):
She is a pistol.

Speaker 1 (14:26):
Well, okay, hello, morning show, says Sandy, who is a
P one listener, which means she listens all the time,
and I recognize her name. Sandy is probably closer to
my age than to your age, and so we love you, Sandy,
thanks for listening all this time. Jenny gave an update
on how she's doing since the breakup, and this had

(14:46):
me thinking, I've been married since twenty eleven, and we
went through a tough period almost right away after the
wedding on year three of being together. I think the
change in him was doing to be due to him
being in Afghanistan for eight months, which was a scary
replace to be for work as a contractor not with
a military that time. Had we not been married, we
would have broken up because he became mean and controlling,

(15:09):
So we went to couple's therapy and learned to cope.
We're still married fourteen years later. Jenny, do you think
being married would have changed the outcome of your relationship?
And I'm going to stop right now and say, you're
probably not going to answer this one. It's none of
my business. And does that change your feeling your thoughts
on marriage? So, in other words, would you like to
answer the question yes or no? Do you think married

(15:31):
would have changed the outcome of your relationship?

Speaker 3 (15:34):
That's a really good question. Maybe, but I don't. I
really don't know.

Speaker 1 (15:42):
Okay, I fair enough.

Speaker 3 (15:44):
I'll be honest.

Speaker 2 (15:44):
I just I'm not going to go into details. And
it's hard to answer that question without going into some details.
But I will say that I mentioned this earlier on
the show that I was listening to the Matthew McConaughey
podcast on the Diary of CEO, and he had a
really interesting take of marriage. He said that once you
get married, you you like own it. You own the house,

(16:07):
is what he said. When you're not married, you're renting,
you're renting an apartment. Yeah, he goes, you're more willing
to work harder because you're married, and I've never looked
at it as that because I don't know, I was
fucking traumatize for my parents' divorce, and so marriage wasn't
really like that big of a deal to me because
I didn't want to get married and then get divorced

(16:28):
like my parents did. Right. So, But I do think
that after going through this breakup, I do look at
marriage a little bit differently. I do think that like,
there may be, could have been. I don't know, it's
hard to say. It's hard. It's really hard to say
without having been married and gone through it.

Speaker 1 (16:47):
Sure, you don't know until you're there yourself, right. I
wonder how old were you when your parents got divorced, Jenny.

Speaker 3 (16:54):
I think I was thirteen, Okay, I.

Speaker 1 (16:56):
Could see how they'd be hard on a kid. Carson
was telling me that his friend, He's like, yeah, guess what,
my friend's parents are getting a divorce. And I'm going
to guess his parents were probably fifties ish or so.
I wonder if it's still really hard on an adult
child to see their parents get divorced. And I know

(17:17):
your parents are divorced, but they did that when you
were little four. Yeah, I wonder if you're an adult
and your parents got divorced. Was it hard on you?
How hard was it on you? Or was it like,
you know what I want and now you're an adult
and you understand. I just want mom and dad to
be happy. Yeah, And if they weren't happy together, then
I hope they can be happy apart. But when you're eleven,

(17:37):
you don't understand why your dad doesn't love your mom anymore.
You don't understand.

Speaker 2 (17:41):
It's more of while we're not one big happy family anyway,
That's what it is.

Speaker 3 (17:45):
It's really sad.

Speaker 2 (17:46):
It's like you or at least from my experience, it
was like, I'm so sad we're not going to go
to the Wisconsin Dellas together anymore. We're not going to
do this together, and I have to live at two
different houses. It was like how it was really going
to affect our life? As I mean, if you were
not really one big happy family at any point. Yeah. Yeah.

Speaker 1 (18:06):
She signs off with have a dart lickety good day,
Thank you, Sandy. This is an interesting one subject. Favorite
new show in Bailey's doppelganger. I'm writing to say if
you haven't seen the show The Girlfriend on Amazon Prime
you must. It's cringey, salacious drama, filled with a twisty

(18:28):
plot and really good acting. I couldn't stop watching. It's
a limited series, which is perfect for a weekend called
The Girlfriend. I gotta remember that. Anyway. I kept thinking
the main actress, especially in her role in the show,
how she wears her hair and her facial expressions remind
me of Bailey. Sure, I've only seen Bailey once in
person and a few photos online. I could be way off,
but do you think this is your potential doppelganger? I

(18:51):
guess face shape is a little different. The actress is
Olivia Cook. If you want to look up Olivia Cook
if Bailey had brown eyes and darker hair A little bit, yeah,
I can kind of see that one.

Speaker 4 (19:02):
This lady's really pretty, but she does have a downturn mouth,
and I have a downturn mouth, So yeah, a little bit.

Speaker 3 (19:08):
I guess.

Speaker 1 (19:09):
Anyway, I appreciate we were really in limbo last night.
We got home, we unpacked, we did all the things
you do, you know, we do launch react her vacation,
and then we make dinner and we sit down to
watch TV. That is what we do. We have dinner
and watch TV. Always one hundred percent of the time.
And we turn on the TV and Susan's like, well,
you find you poke around and find something you want

(19:31):
to watch. And we found something about the It's like
the Unfit Mother or something. It was the really crazy
Mormon woman who killed her son and daughter. Remember that
story a couple of years ago. I do, yeah, I remember.
She was super uber religious and she really thought that
God was telling her that she had to prepare for
the apocalypse and that meant killing her children. And it's

(19:53):
not very good, and we were really at a loss
is for what to watch. So for about a half
an hour we sat there watch previews you know how
when you're on Netflix, and that turned into a lot. Yeah,
but this sounds really good, So thank you for the
recommendation of the girlfriend Jenny.

Speaker 3 (20:11):
I did start watching how I the summer.

Speaker 2 (20:14):
I turned pretty well, you have to Keep Me of
House and feel.

Speaker 4 (20:17):
Money, and a million other people recommended it to me,
so I decided.

Speaker 2 (20:21):
I recommended the first season. I fell off on the
second season, so apparently the third one's good, so I
have to power through. That's what I'm watching.

Speaker 1 (20:29):
By the way, I'm going to text one of you
earlier today, earlier, later tonight, and say, what was the
show that was recommended to me?

Speaker 3 (20:37):
The Girlfriend?

Speaker 1 (20:38):
Thank you, You're welcome, because I'd already forgotten it.

Speaker 2 (20:40):
Okay, the Girlfriend I'm barely remembered too, because I already
forgot to.

Speaker 3 (20:45):
I'm titled.

Speaker 2 (20:46):
I feel like, recommend it so many fucking shows and
I can't keep up because I don't watch TV barely
at all. So then all of a sudden, I'll hop
on TV and I was like, God, I wish I
remembered one.

Speaker 3 (20:55):
Just one of the recommendations I've been giving.

Speaker 1 (20:57):
Same. Yeah, and people recommend stuff to was probably one
on a day and I don't remember it. So we'll
be like, oh, Dave, you got to check out the
x y Z on Hulu. Oh wow, that sounds cool.
I never remember.

Speaker 4 (21:08):
I'm going to title the podcast the Girlfriend, so that
if you forget, just remember the podcast is titled that.

Speaker 1 (21:13):
I appreciate that brilliant and that is going to do
it for the Minnesota Goodbye. We would love to hear
from you. Send your email to what was it again?
Ryan No, mother in law at Fondelac dot com. Yeah,
did you.

Speaker 3 (21:29):
Say I did?

Speaker 2 (21:31):
Whoa concerned respect how because I know that this is
a worldwide podcast, all right, I am genuinely concerned worry
about it.

Speaker 3 (21:39):
I wouldn't care if it gets back it's back to her.

Speaker 2 (21:42):
I just don't want there to be drama with anyone else,
like I don't give a shit or she doesn't like me, okay,
but like I don't want it to cause drama for
my sister.

Speaker 1 (21:49):
That's the only I get it, okay. Well, she also.

Speaker 2 (21:52):
Revealed something in there that's supposed to be a surprise
this weekend, so I also pulled the Dave Ryan. Then
if people hear this, I shouldn't hear this.

Speaker 1 (21:59):
I've spoiled the several surprises in my life. We'll tell
that story another time. And that's going to do it
for the Minnesota goodbye. Seriously, love to hear from you.
Send your emails to Ryan's show at kadiwb dot com.
The more random, the better