Matt and Tyler's New Zealander of the Week - 30 May

Every Friday on Matt and Tyler afternoons on ZB we name the New Zealander of the week. 

It's an honour that we grant on your behalf to someone who has had effect on our great and beautiful nation over the past week. 

There are three nominees but can only be one winner.

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Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:09):
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Speaker 2 (00:17):
Every Friday on Matt and Tyler Afternoons on zb we
honor a newsmaker who has had an outsized effect on
our great and beautiful nation over the previous seven days.
As always, there will be three nominees, but only one winner.
And remember, like the Time Magazine Person of the Year,
the New Zealand of the Week isn't always an agent
of good. So, without further ado, the nominees for Matt
and Tyler Afternoons New Zealand of the Week AH Nominee

(00:38):
one also gets the finally Freed from the shackles of
regulatory Tyranny Award. The brightness of their lights have been
brutally controlled since the eighties, as has the position of
their seats and even the very snacks they serve to
their shaggy customers. What's worse, for decades they have been
forced to cruelly discriminate against our furry friends. But this

(00:59):
week they were freed. So celebrate with a glass of wine,
a shampoo and a tight fade. Free at last, Free,
at last, Free, at last, New Zealand's headdresses. You can
finally be you and for that you have been nominated
for New Zealander of the Week. Who nomine two also
gets the highlighting a serious problem with your craziness award.
Last month painters were called back to a job in

(01:21):
christ Church. They had just finished snag listed and ticked
every box, but what they found was two hundred posted
notes per room, stuck to invisible, non existent blemishes. There
are people in this country that will never be happy
and they need to be shamed. Crazy punishing unnamed, overly
fussy trady, punishing christ Church homeowner for bringing to light
the very real issue of chronic dissatisfaction syndrome that is

(01:43):
sweeping this increasingly winging, ungrateful nation. You know who you
are and you are nominated for New Zealand of the Week.
CDs is real and needs to be called out wherever
it raises its ugly head. Definitely serious issue. But there
can be only one New Zealand of the Week, okay,
and the winner gets the holy crap one of them

(02:04):
is only six years old award, while most Kiwi kids
are sitting on their asses doom scrolling, playing video games
or pretending to be sick to get out of doing
anything other than shoving junk food into their lazy fat faces.
These ones just finished an epic two hundred and eighty
day three thousand kilometers north to south trek of New Zealand,
over mountains and beaches and through streams, forests and towns,

(02:25):
over hills, over plains, and in the marden in the rain.
The Williams family kept rolling along topa Shermulchers, Dad Andrew
Muncourtney Oliver thirteen, Summer eleven, Sky nine and Elliot six
for walking from the top to the bottom of our
great and beautiful land. You are the Matt and Tyler
Afternoons New Zealanders of the week, Take it away, Howie Morrison,

(02:51):
Great New Zealanders, what shit well, not to be mistaken
for the morokopper Man. I repeat, Tom Phillips was not involved,
No congratulations, give him a taste of kiwe. God bless
and godspeed the Williams family.

Speaker 1 (03:21):
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