September 25, 2022 • 29 mins
Maller is in the studio with Danny G. and they're having some podcast fun with the mail bag for your Sunday! All questions sent in by P1's of the #MallerMilitia! Download, subscribe, and remember that sharing is caring (unless it's an STD.) Follow Danny G. @DannyGradio and Ben on Twitter @BenMaller and listen to the original terrestrial radio edition of "Ben Maller Show," Monday-Friday on Fox Sports Radio, 2a-6a ET, 11p-3a PT!
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
Kaboom. If you thought four hours a day, dred minutes
a week was enough, I think again. He's the last
remnants of the old republic. A sole fashion of fairness.
He treats crackheads in the ghetto gutter the same as
the rich pill poppers in the penthouse. To clearing house
of hot takes, break free for something special. The fifth
(00:23):
hour with Ben Maller starts right now. In the air everywhere,
eight days a week. There is no stopping the fifth
hour with Ben Maller and Danny G radio. Back at
it again with the male bag. Never all right, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no,
(00:50):
you will not be hearing the sound of that. No, no, no, not, not, not, not, not, no.
As we bring the heavy R tillery and before we
get into the mail bag, Danny G Ohio, all strike
up the band. It's all right, very good, Danny. Any
(01:25):
opening foster? Should we just go right to the mail bag?
What do you say? Let's attack this head on. All right,
we are going to attack it one by one we go,
and that's right, Kevin in Kansas, right, since this ne're
Ben and Danny G, I like knowing how the sausage
is made. Could you give some insider information about how
(01:48):
to create your podcast or how you create your podcast,
either the main show or the fifth hour? I listened
to them all. Thanks, gentlemen. That is from Kevin in Kansas. Well, Kevin,
there's a method to the madness. As Danny G has said,
you don't necessarily want to know how we make the sausage. Uh,
but there is a routine that we have. As far
(02:11):
as the podcast, it really depends on what part of
the year it is. Right now it's football season and
we're doing benny versus the penny on the podcast, and
so much of my downtime around the radio show I
spend I like to handicap the NFL Games. Like to
think I know what's going on in the NFL. So
I spent a lot of time following the radio show
(02:33):
be checking out stats and notes and information gambling numbers
on the NFL Games and then we will record that
at a certain point and then we've we've settled into
this routine to anywhere. Normally on Saturdays we talk about
things that are going on in our world, which is
(02:55):
good and bad. Uh, it's good because it's it's something cool.
But sometimes if there's nothing going on. You're like, wait
a minute, I didn't really do anything. And but fortunately
there's always something that seems to happen, because we only
really need one or two things, Danny. That happens during
the week and we do live exciting radio lives rock stars,
(03:16):
unless we're not. But Southern California provides a lot of content.
My tinderroni provides a lot of content, your wife provides
you with content and you have, uh, serious injuries from
time to time that come up like like you looked
like Patrick Ewing walking around the studio the other day.
(03:36):
I am sacrificing my body for the fifth hour podcast,
for the life of Mallard podcast. I have injured my knee,
my two I've burned my arm. I've still had listeners
asking me about the Marianera episode. Oh Man, I was
back at trader Joe's last weekend and I walked down
the aisle that has all the pasta sauce and I
(03:57):
gave the Marinera the evil eye. I stared down the Marianera,
but I did and I said screw you, Meranera. That's
what I said. I can give you one little piece
of behind the scenes for the podcast besides doing post
production with the drops and imaging pieces and stuff like that,
I also go through all of the wave files and
(04:19):
I wish I could show you. If it was TV,
I could show you what those look like, but just
google wave files. You'll see what they look like and
I find wherever your voice really peaks and I control
that with a filter. Talk now and then. That way
it doesn't blow people's air drums out when they're listening
to the podcast. It reminds me of the reverse. When
(04:41):
I was working in San Diego Lee Hamilton's hack saw
he had a pedal under the studio chair, and so
the way this would work is when he get into
a screaming match with the caller, he would then press
the pedal, and so therefore he would always be louder
(05:02):
than the person he was getting into the I've never
had that. I wish I could have that. That would
be a lot of fun. That would be bad news.
Pedal to the medal. Next up is Blake in Arkansas.
He says Ben Why is it that an NFL team
(05:24):
jumps out to a ten point plus halftime lead? When
that happens, you can almost gearantee that the losing team
will make a comeback. College Ball seems to go the
opposite direction. The better team get stronger, they get faster,
they're better in the second half and they extend the lead.
(05:45):
I'm to the point that if I like the favorite,
I will just bet the first half. I'm not much
of a conspiracy guy, outside of politics, of course, but
something stinks. Any thoughts? Well, I haven't spent too much
time thinking about it, Blake, but it is a fair point.
It's why, in the gambling world I've always been under
(06:07):
the assumption, in what I was taught by older gamblers,
is in college you bet the favorite. In the NFL
you lean to the underdog if all things are equal,
and it does seem like even when they don't come
back and win, if a team jumps out to a
big start, the other team will get back in the game.
(06:27):
They might not win the game, but they'll typically get
back in the game. And in any given weekend maybe
there's one game that's just a rat kill and a blowout,
but other than that, at the most too in a
given weekend, every other game is within ten points or less,
(06:47):
and usually it's within seven points or less. So it's
one of those things. If you bet those monster teasers
where you get ten points, it's like, well, wait a
minute here, how can you lose? But you just gotta
make sure you don't pick the one game that turns
out to be a debacle, because there's always that one game.
So you gotta avoid the one game, but other than
(07:08):
that you should be all right. Come back. It's side.
From now I'll call Pierre formally from Springfield now from
West Warren. He points out narrowcasting, Pierre says, to either
of you, gentlemen, pre record sporting events. Do you do?
You do that? Personally? I don't watch, ever, ever watch anything.
(07:31):
Pierre says that I already know the outcome of unless
you count a rebroadcast of a historical game or an
occasional replay of a throwback game, and our regional sports
network any progress, he says, on landing the Great Karen
Kay or. She's still bitter that you bend blew her
(07:51):
off at the birthday party she had back in the day.
It's Pierre Fan of earning the great opening. Yeah, I
screwed up. I for some reason Ernie's name popped into
my head, not alf the grade oplaner. I said Ernie,
it's a bad job by me. We we really haven't
reached out to Karen Lately, but we can make that
happen once things calm down with Benny versus the penny
(08:15):
and all that. Will definitely have Karen Kaon, maybe sooner,
who knows. And as far as the rebroadcast, I'll go
first on that, Danny H if I know the score,
I will not watch, but I do fall into rabbit holes.
I'll be on the treadmill back when I had a
working knee and I'll be watching like they'll they'll show
uh an NBC game of the week with Tony Kubeck,
(08:37):
or they'll show Monday night baseball game on one of
those old school baseball channels and as long as they
don't put the score of the game in the description
that I click on, I'm in. Like I'll turn on.
I turned on a random like it was a Chicago
White Sox match up with the Oakland athletics from like
the early eighties, and I didn't know who won the
(09:01):
game and I didn't really remember. You know, maybe I
watched it, maybe I didn't, but I was in because
I didn't know the outcome. I didn't remember the outcome.
What about you did. Even when the dvr became a thing,
I didn't use it to record sports because that's appointment viewing.
If I didn't see it live, then I would watch highlights,
(09:22):
but to watch an old game back. No, the only
time I think I watched old game back is if
my team destroyed another or had a really good showing
and then there was a replay like on the NFL network.
I would watch some of it again, but I don't
think I've actually taped a game as it was going
since way back when I was a kid and we
(09:43):
had VCRs and we would record classic Lakers Games, Raider
Games at the l a coliseum and stuff like that,
because at the time my mom would make us go
to church or something like that and we would have
to tape it. That way we could come home and
see what happened and there wasn't social media ruining the
(10:04):
score for us. Yeah, exactly. It's very difficult, if you're
plugged in, to not find out the score, even by accident.
You might not be trying to get the score, but
you'll see it somewhere, whether it's on your phone or
you'll be driving and it'll pop up somewhere and it
does ruin the experience and I will not watch a
(10:26):
sporting event if I know who already won. What's the point?
I'm right there with you on that. I got mail, yeah,
I got mail. Yea, Carlos from Bang Bang Houston says hey, Ben,
I was wondering if I can get a birthday shout out.
It's on the the twenty seconds, so it was earlier
(10:47):
this week. I know you don't do birthday shoutouts on
the radio, but it's a podcast. What are the rules, Danny?
Do we are we allowed to do birthday shoutouts on
the podcast? I thought I was more of a a
one on one thing where you know, you know radio part.
This is broadcasting still, right, podcast. I think they need
(11:10):
to pay you for one of those. Uh, be a cameo.
You can do a cameo for you if you want
and uh, but anyway, Carlos said, yeah, you've lived a
tough life. Your heroes, the s strows, ruining all of
Houston Sports, tarnished because of the cheating scandal. But you
(11:31):
seem like a good guy and you're a fan of
the show and I wish I could give your birthday
shout out, but I can he also says, what's the
most memorable and worst birthdays you guys have ever had?
Keep up the great work. What we've talked about this
in the past and I don't know, do we want
to go back down that road. Danny, do you wanna?
You want to share memories? But I will say really
(11:51):
quick on my twenty one birthday, instead of it being
some amazing blowout, I went and there was this girl
I was dating at the time time and she was
dead tired because of her work schedule. Her roommate could
not wake her up. She was dead to the world.
So I sat in the living room. A couple of
the roommates gave me a bear to pop open and
(12:13):
I sat there on the couch watching a TV show.
What a wonderful memory, great twenty first birthday, but you
were you weren't totally alone. There were other people there.
There were other people and she felt bad when she
woke up. So she's like, Oh, I'm gonna make it
up to you tomorrow. I'm so sorry about my schedule,
but my actual twenty first birthday sucked because of her. Wow,
(12:35):
all right. Next up, as we continue further and further
than the mid back now if you want to be
part of the mailback. Some weeks we get a ton
of mails, some weeks we don't get that many. It's
really a hit and miss. But if you would like
to be part of it, we can't guarantee we're gonna
use your question on the air, but I can guarantee
we won't use it if you don't send it. So
send it care of real fifth our real fifth out
(12:56):
the email we use for this podcast. Real fifth hour
at email dot com. Spell it all out. No numbers.
Real fifth hour at GMAIL DOT com. And I post
on usually Tuesdays, sometimes in the morning, sometimes in the afternoon,
requesting questions. So there's a couple of different ways you
can do it. You can post it online or email
(13:17):
it privately and we may use your question on the air.
You've got mail Chris and Marracca to Iowa. He sent
an email and he says Ben, I'm putting at Ben
in Dannergy. I'm putting a resonant lot up for sale
after my wife and I decided we don't want to
build on the land anymore. And Uh, and Chris says
(13:38):
I have I have it listed in facebook marketplace right now.
Did you use a realtor when you sold the Mallard Mansion,
and do you have any other advice for me trying
to sell it myself? To have some some sweet dough? Uh.
He also says ps go raiders. That cardinal game hurt bad. So, Chris,
(13:59):
first of all, we use a realtor. You can do
it without a realtor, although I don't know much about
facebook marketplace and I'm not sure what the real estate
market is in that platform. And so my advice, if
you really want to go cheap and you really wanna
(14:21):
you want to go by the by the cheapest route possible.
What I would do, since apparently there's no property, it's
just land, but there's still a lot of legal bullshit
you gotta fill out. So my advice would be too
pay a small amount by the hour to a realtor
(14:45):
rather than giving them a commission, a flat commission on land.
You could probably find somebody that would do it for
a nominal amount of money where they have to do
the paperwork. Had A buddy of mine I worked with
in Radio, he actually became a realtor and he's one
of the most successful realtors in the San Fernando Valley
here in L A and it always blew me away
(15:06):
because I was like, you guys, it's a radio guy
and he doesn't really know a lot about the numbers
and all that. And he told me he hired uh,
this assistant, this woman who's really good with the numbers,
and he hired this guy that helps him out with
the paperwork, and so he doesn't do any of the bullcrap.
He just has to worry about making the deal, and
so there are ways you can do that. I would
(15:27):
advise that Chris any tips Danny G on real estate
dealings for Chris and Marraccata Iowa who wants to save
a couple of shekels. Be careful, watch out for squatters.
My mom and Stepdad had a piece of property in
Montana for years. It had nothing built on it. When
they finally went to check out the land, you know,
(15:48):
it was a while they hadn't been there. There was
somebody squatting and living on the land and it turned
up to be a nightmare to get the squatter off
the property. Yeah, we've heard that it's it's it's certain states.
I don't know what it's. Obviously Montana you're talking about.
I don't California. It's it's like the squatter has more
rights than the people that actually own the property. It's
(16:10):
really messed up how they do that, but good luck
to you, Chris. I would attempt to get on the
real estate websites. That's uh, that's the way to go
on and make sure you forward us that address. I'm
gonna bring my tent over there for vacation. Yeah, Danny
G'S gonna have his hunting moon right there in Iowa
and Marracca, Iowa. Come back. It's time from now. I'll
(16:32):
call Mike from fullerton rights and he says, following up
on an answer from last week, you are right not
to read the really offensive land jokes on the fifth hour.
The Guy who was chosen to host jeopardy after Alex
Trebek passed away was quickly fired, Mike points out, after
(16:53):
people dug up old comments he made on a podcast.
And as much as I like the fifth hour, if
you ever read a joke that personally offended me, I
still wouldn't think twice before starting an online petition to
shut your podcast down, Mike. Mike says. Now to my question.
(17:16):
How many people have each of you gotten canceled? If none.
Who would you like to cancel in the future? So
I'll go first. I have not really gotten anyone canceled,
although I did get an NBA player find a game
check of over sixty thousand dollars because of my website,
(17:38):
Ben Mallard Dot Com. Years ago. I've told the story
a few times on the PODCAST, on the radio show.
There was a basketball player named Matrell Sprewell. Pretty good player,
very angry player. He's most known for choking his coach
when he played for the Golden State Warriors, but he
was on the Minnesota Timberwolves. They were playing the clippers.
It was on a Saturday night and the fans were
(18:00):
heckling latrell spree. Well, there was one woman that was
heckling latreill and La Trail decided to scream out when
the crowd was quiet and explain what the woman could
do to Latrell. It involved kneepads and a tongue bath
and needless to say, uh, that that did not go
(18:20):
over well. It got picked up on the live television
broadcast and, uh, let's just say, somebody I know, who
may or may not have been working on the broadcast,
let me know about it. I wrote a story about
it on my website and uh, the N B A
was there were fans of my website. They read about
(18:41):
it on my website and ended up finding it. They
originally suspended him for a game. Latrell spree well and
they ended up taking the suspension away, but they find
him a game check because of that and it would
not have happened. It would not have happened without that story.
The other part of that which was great, I had
a buddy of mine who was an NBA executive for
(19:04):
for a team and I explained the situation and he
told me, because this happened on a Saturday, he said, Ben,
nothing's gonna Happen on Sunday. Nothing ever happens in the NBA,
the NFL or Major League baseball on Saturday or Sunday.
All the executives go out to Long Island, they go
(19:24):
out to the Hampton's, they go upstate, they go downstate,
but they're not at the office. And he's right. Nothing
happens on the weekends. All these decisions are Monday through Friday.
The League offices shut down in the NBA on it
was a Monday evening. They announced the punishment for Spreedwell, Danny,
have you gotten anyone canceled or would you like to
(19:46):
get someone canceled? I have never gotten anybody canceled. Not
your style. I can write a kid yellow detention for him,
but even that was hard. Yeah, alright, so, yeah, you
punished the kids. Yeah, kids have to explain to their parents. Well,
you Gott what did you do? Shame on you. I'm
smiling and having fun there at the school way more
(20:08):
than I'm writing tickets. I got mail, yea, I got mail. Yea. Oh,
we sailor to George, George, George, George, George, George, George, George, George, Vancouver,
British Columbia. Ever been to John Cole? That's right, Vancouver
(20:32):
is beautiful. I've never been there, but I've seen lots
of photos and videos and looks like an amazing place. Van.
I would love to go there as well. Yeah, I
would like to get there. He says he's been listening
for five plus years. George, you guys are the best,
as you know, George, the best means as good as
all the rest of all, except that, as a compliment,
(20:52):
I would say a Good Friday guest for the fifth
hour would be sean the Hood Guy. He is a beauty,
George says. Well, I'm a fan of Sean the Hood
Guy as well. I'm bummed out we didn't get to
meet him at that Mallard meet and reet, but hopefully
next year when we do another one in L A,
in the L A area, we'll be able to meet
Sean the Hood Guy, says. This past Sunday into Monday,
(21:17):
the First Hour Baltimore Crows. Maybe that's why they didn't
cut the check. Beautiful, he says. I love it when
you bust looney's, Arnie's and Jonas balls. Signed George, go
hard on a guy in Van coouver. Well, George, thank
you for listening. Five years, where does the time go?
(21:41):
Goes by pretty quick and I still attack Looney, even
though he does not work for the company anymore. And
I am still fascinated the fact that Arnie, Arnie Spanier,
a veteran talk to your host, is afraid of the
Mallard militia. That fascinates me about Arnie. Uh and Jonas,
now a big morning host. Love, love goofing on Jonas
(22:03):
and it's good to see him now that I'm back
in studio. Half the time I see Jonas half the
week and I see him and Lavar Arrington and those guys,
and so it's nice to see them as we are
ships passing in the middle of the night literally. Why
don't we do one more and uh, I know you
have places going, things to do, Danny G. is that accurate?
(22:24):
Is that correct? Would that be fair? Yeah, it's another
day at the studios today. Alright. So last one, nick
in Wisconsin. Right, so he says Benn and Danny G.
So let's play start, bench cut food edition. I actually
like this. I say this as my closer, because this
is a version of F Mary kill, the food version,
(22:47):
and this is a good, good deal by Nick. Good
job by you, nick. I give you a gold star
next to your name. Thumbs up. So Nick in wisconsins
is Benn and Dang. Let's play start, bench cut food edition. China,
these Mexican and Italian food. You make the call. What
do you do? All right, start means you get that
(23:08):
food whenever, bench means you get it only sometimes, and
cut means you can never consume the food again. Holy Cannoli. Alright,
so this is very difficult. These are tremendous food groups,
cultural food groups, Chinese food, Mexican food and Italian food.
(23:29):
But I have decided in this game of start bench
and cut my starter, Viva Mexico. I'm going with the
Mexican food. That is my starter. I love Mexican food.
A very lucky to live in California, which is really
just like northern Mexico, uh, and they have a tremendous
(23:50):
Mexican food here. So somebody talented cooks and chefs and whatnot,
and restaurants and just wonderful. So I go and this
you can eat tacos one day, burritos the next. There's
so many different options with the Mexican food, Spicy and
get mild. So I'm going to Mexican food now the
number two. See that this is where it gets really hard,
(24:13):
because you can never eat one of these foods again, Damn.
But I'm gonna put it. I'M gonna put Italian as
my as my bench, and Italian is gonna be my
my bench, and that means I'm gonna say bye bye
to Chinese food. And I love the Chinese food, but
(24:35):
I gotta say goodbye to it. And the reason I'm
gonna say goodbye to it, Danny, is because when I
eat Chinese food, it often does not fill me up,
and so when I eat a hearty Italian meal or
a nice big Mexican meal, I feel full. Uh. And
and also, I go to a Mexican restaurant, free chips.
(24:55):
I go to an Italian restaurant, they've got bread on
the table and if they don't, I walk out. I
go to a Chinese restaurant. What do they have on
the table? Nothing, they got like soy sauce or something
like that. So I'm taking the Mexican food as my ace,
I'm taking the Italian as my closer, occasional closer, and
then I say bye bye to the Chinese food. What
(25:15):
about you, Danny? Play the game now. What a great
game this is. Start Bench or cut Italian, Mexican Chinese food? Wow,
great question. This is a tough one and I like
that we have different lineups here. I'M gonna have to
start Chinese food. Yeah, and the reason why is because
panda express is in our rotation almost every week. But
(25:38):
is that actually really Chinese food? Americanized Chinese food, American
Chinese food, but I think it's still counts because also
we love Thai in Japanese. I would include that in
that category. But but I would like, uh, some good
Sushi Rolls, good Japanese restaurant, a good Thai restaurant. That's
(26:01):
gotta be in the mix. Mexican food, I would just
bench for a little while. Taco night at our Casa
is one of the best nights there is. I can't
imagine living without that. And I hate to kill my heritage,
my Siciliano heritage. You can't, you you have relatives turning
over in their grave. Danny, you can't do this. But
(26:24):
here's the thing. I've eaten enough Italian food to last
two lifetimes. So I've already had my fill of its,
starting from when grandma g used to make the pasta
from scratch and the bread from scratch and have get
togethers every Sunday. Oh the smell insider kitchen ben I
(26:46):
mean I saw relatives I hadn't seen in weeks and
they would come over just for the food. Dating back
to when I was a little kid, I've had real
Italian food. So I think because of that I could
kill it and maybe not killed myself. She died of
a heart attack, unfortunately, and you know why. She had
Marinara sauce in her vein. You got rid of the
(27:08):
blood with the BARONET. Well, that's a fair point. You
have eating a lot of Italian food, but you think
of the diversity the Italian lineup, with the Raviolie, the
different pastas, the beef dishes. I mean you can go
any direction with that. What's your go to? It at
Panda Express? What's your go to? Because I was an
orange chicken guy with Beijing beef. That was my ya.
(27:30):
I love that Beijing beef as well. I like the
chicken and green beans, the good one, and I love
the orange chicken, like a lot of people. But the key, Danny,
as you know, is you gotta make sure it's fresh.
You don't want to go when it's like the last
couple of pieces of orange chicken it's sitting around, it
get soggy. Who wants that? No veteran move. You tell
(27:53):
them all wait until you bring out another hot dish. Yeah,
that's the way to do it. And John Real quick says,
do you ever think Kyler Murray is just waiting for
the moment to kick your ass for what you say?
I'm not not too worried about Kyler and even if
he tried to kick my ass. I don't think you
could reach my ass uh, and and he doesn't even
(28:13):
know about me because I'm not on twitch and I'm
not playing video games. So I don't think Kyler even
knows who I am. So I think we're good on that,
although I understand he does go on twitter. It's probably
seen some of those videos. All right, we'll get out
on that, Danny G. Sunday, Sunday. I know I'll be
back after all these NFL Games, after that Sunday night
forty nine or Bronco game, back in the radio studio.
(28:36):
What do you have going on today? How can people
follow you? Danny g? This is where I always say
I'm gonna go in for the very fun Covino and
rich show. This is gonna be the last Sunday Covino
and rich show, so that's gonna be awesome. Of course,
the new weekday show for them starts tomorrow on Monday
at two PM west coast time, and Rich Fox foot
(29:00):
all Sunday. That should be a cool show because they're
going to direct their regular audience to their new Monday
program and then right after that to lead into your
first show of the week, which is Chris Plankett, Arnie Spaniard,
awesome and and I'll be back, as if we said
there late night on the overnight. A new week is
(29:20):
upon us, so have a great rest of your day
enjoy the football. Thank you for continuing to support this podcast,
even as we've crossed the Rubicon into football season, and
we will catch you next time, same podcast, same download
the whole thing later. SKATER POPULATION
Kaboom. If you thought four hours a day, dred minutes
a week was enough, I think again. He's the last
remnants of the old republic. A sole fashion of fairness.
He treats crackheads in the ghetto gutter the same as
the rich pill poppers in the penthouse. To clearing house
of hot takes, break free for something special. The fifth
(00:23):
hour with Ben Maller starts right now. In the air everywhere,
eight days a week. There is no stopping the fifth
hour with Ben Maller and Danny G radio. Back at
it again with the male bag. Never all right, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no,
(00:50):
you will not be hearing the sound of that. No, no, no, not, not, not, not, not, no.
As we bring the heavy R tillery and before we
get into the mail bag, Danny G Ohio, all strike
up the band. It's all right, very good, Danny. Any
(01:25):
opening foster? Should we just go right to the mail bag?
What do you say? Let's attack this head on. All right,
we are going to attack it one by one we go,
and that's right, Kevin in Kansas, right, since this ne're
Ben and Danny G, I like knowing how the sausage
is made. Could you give some insider information about how
(01:48):
to create your podcast or how you create your podcast,
either the main show or the fifth hour? I listened
to them all. Thanks, gentlemen. That is from Kevin in Kansas. Well, Kevin,
there's a method to the madness. As Danny G has said,
you don't necessarily want to know how we make the sausage. Uh,
but there is a routine that we have. As far
(02:11):
as the podcast, it really depends on what part of
the year it is. Right now it's football season and
we're doing benny versus the penny on the podcast, and
so much of my downtime around the radio show I
spend I like to handicap the NFL Games. Like to
think I know what's going on in the NFL. So
I spent a lot of time following the radio show
(02:33):
be checking out stats and notes and information gambling numbers
on the NFL Games and then we will record that
at a certain point and then we've we've settled into
this routine to anywhere. Normally on Saturdays we talk about
things that are going on in our world, which is
(02:55):
good and bad. Uh, it's good because it's it's something cool.
But sometimes if there's nothing going on. You're like, wait
a minute, I didn't really do anything. And but fortunately
there's always something that seems to happen, because we only
really need one or two things, Danny. That happens during
the week and we do live exciting radio lives rock stars,
(03:16):
unless we're not. But Southern California provides a lot of content.
My tinderroni provides a lot of content, your wife provides
you with content and you have, uh, serious injuries from
time to time that come up like like you looked
like Patrick Ewing walking around the studio the other day.
(03:36):
I am sacrificing my body for the fifth hour podcast,
for the life of Mallard podcast. I have injured my knee,
my two I've burned my arm. I've still had listeners
asking me about the Marianera episode. Oh Man, I was
back at trader Joe's last weekend and I walked down
the aisle that has all the pasta sauce and I
(03:57):
gave the Marinera the evil eye. I stared down the Marianera,
but I did and I said screw you, Meranera. That's
what I said. I can give you one little piece
of behind the scenes for the podcast besides doing post
production with the drops and imaging pieces and stuff like that,
I also go through all of the wave files and
(04:19):
I wish I could show you. If it was TV,
I could show you what those look like, but just
google wave files. You'll see what they look like and
I find wherever your voice really peaks and I control
that with a filter. Talk now and then. That way
it doesn't blow people's air drums out when they're listening
to the podcast. It reminds me of the reverse. When
(04:41):
I was working in San Diego Lee Hamilton's hack saw
he had a pedal under the studio chair, and so
the way this would work is when he get into
a screaming match with the caller, he would then press
the pedal, and so therefore he would always be louder
(05:02):
than the person he was getting into the I've never
had that. I wish I could have that. That would
be a lot of fun. That would be bad news.
Pedal to the medal. Next up is Blake in Arkansas.
He says Ben Why is it that an NFL team
(05:24):
jumps out to a ten point plus halftime lead? When
that happens, you can almost gearantee that the losing team
will make a comeback. College Ball seems to go the
opposite direction. The better team get stronger, they get faster,
they're better in the second half and they extend the lead.
(05:45):
I'm to the point that if I like the favorite,
I will just bet the first half. I'm not much
of a conspiracy guy, outside of politics, of course, but
something stinks. Any thoughts? Well, I haven't spent too much
time thinking about it, Blake, but it is a fair point.
It's why, in the gambling world I've always been under
(06:07):
the assumption, in what I was taught by older gamblers,
is in college you bet the favorite. In the NFL
you lean to the underdog if all things are equal,
and it does seem like even when they don't come
back and win, if a team jumps out to a
big start, the other team will get back in the game.
(06:27):
They might not win the game, but they'll typically get
back in the game. And in any given weekend maybe
there's one game that's just a rat kill and a blowout,
but other than that, at the most too in a
given weekend, every other game is within ten points or less,
(06:47):
and usually it's within seven points or less. So it's
one of those things. If you bet those monster teasers
where you get ten points, it's like, well, wait a
minute here, how can you lose? But you just gotta
make sure you don't pick the one game that turns
out to be a debacle, because there's always that one game.
So you gotta avoid the one game, but other than
(07:08):
that you should be all right. Come back. It's side.
From now I'll call Pierre formally from Springfield now from
West Warren. He points out narrowcasting, Pierre says, to either
of you, gentlemen, pre record sporting events. Do you do?
You do that? Personally? I don't watch, ever, ever watch anything.
(07:31):
Pierre says that I already know the outcome of unless
you count a rebroadcast of a historical game or an
occasional replay of a throwback game, and our regional sports
network any progress, he says, on landing the Great Karen
Kay or. She's still bitter that you bend blew her
(07:51):
off at the birthday party she had back in the day.
It's Pierre Fan of earning the great opening. Yeah, I
screwed up. I for some reason Ernie's name popped into
my head, not alf the grade oplaner. I said Ernie,
it's a bad job by me. We we really haven't
reached out to Karen Lately, but we can make that
happen once things calm down with Benny versus the penny
(08:15):
and all that. Will definitely have Karen Kaon, maybe sooner,
who knows. And as far as the rebroadcast, I'll go
first on that, Danny H if I know the score,
I will not watch, but I do fall into rabbit holes.
I'll be on the treadmill back when I had a
working knee and I'll be watching like they'll they'll show
uh an NBC game of the week with Tony Kubeck,
(08:37):
or they'll show Monday night baseball game on one of
those old school baseball channels and as long as they
don't put the score of the game in the description
that I click on, I'm in. Like I'll turn on.
I turned on a random like it was a Chicago
White Sox match up with the Oakland athletics from like
the early eighties, and I didn't know who won the
(09:01):
game and I didn't really remember. You know, maybe I
watched it, maybe I didn't, but I was in because
I didn't know the outcome. I didn't remember the outcome.
What about you did. Even when the dvr became a thing,
I didn't use it to record sports because that's appointment viewing.
If I didn't see it live, then I would watch highlights,
(09:22):
but to watch an old game back. No, the only
time I think I watched old game back is if
my team destroyed another or had a really good showing
and then there was a replay like on the NFL network.
I would watch some of it again, but I don't
think I've actually taped a game as it was going
since way back when I was a kid and we
(09:43):
had VCRs and we would record classic Lakers Games, Raider
Games at the l a coliseum and stuff like that,
because at the time my mom would make us go
to church or something like that and we would have
to tape it. That way we could come home and
see what happened and there wasn't social media ruining the
(10:04):
score for us. Yeah, exactly. It's very difficult, if you're
plugged in, to not find out the score, even by accident.
You might not be trying to get the score, but
you'll see it somewhere, whether it's on your phone or
you'll be driving and it'll pop up somewhere and it
does ruin the experience and I will not watch a
(10:26):
sporting event if I know who already won. What's the point?
I'm right there with you on that. I got mail, yeah,
I got mail. Yea, Carlos from Bang Bang Houston says hey, Ben,
I was wondering if I can get a birthday shout out.
It's on the the twenty seconds, so it was earlier
(10:47):
this week. I know you don't do birthday shoutouts on
the radio, but it's a podcast. What are the rules, Danny?
Do we are we allowed to do birthday shoutouts on
the podcast? I thought I was more of a a
one on one thing where you know, you know radio part.
This is broadcasting still, right, podcast. I think they need
(11:10):
to pay you for one of those. Uh, be a cameo.
You can do a cameo for you if you want
and uh, but anyway, Carlos said, yeah, you've lived a
tough life. Your heroes, the s strows, ruining all of
Houston Sports, tarnished because of the cheating scandal. But you
(11:31):
seem like a good guy and you're a fan of
the show and I wish I could give your birthday
shout out, but I can he also says, what's the
most memorable and worst birthdays you guys have ever had?
Keep up the great work. What we've talked about this
in the past and I don't know, do we want
to go back down that road. Danny, do you wanna?
You want to share memories? But I will say really
(11:51):
quick on my twenty one birthday, instead of it being
some amazing blowout, I went and there was this girl
I was dating at the time time and she was
dead tired because of her work schedule. Her roommate could
not wake her up. She was dead to the world.
So I sat in the living room. A couple of
the roommates gave me a bear to pop open and
(12:13):
I sat there on the couch watching a TV show.
What a wonderful memory, great twenty first birthday, but you
were you weren't totally alone. There were other people there.
There were other people and she felt bad when she
woke up. So she's like, Oh, I'm gonna make it
up to you tomorrow. I'm so sorry about my schedule,
but my actual twenty first birthday sucked because of her. Wow,
(12:35):
all right. Next up, as we continue further and further
than the mid back now if you want to be
part of the mailback. Some weeks we get a ton
of mails, some weeks we don't get that many. It's
really a hit and miss. But if you would like
to be part of it, we can't guarantee we're gonna
use your question on the air, but I can guarantee
we won't use it if you don't send it. So
send it care of real fifth our real fifth out
(12:56):
the email we use for this podcast. Real fifth hour
at email dot com. Spell it all out. No numbers.
Real fifth hour at GMAIL DOT com. And I post
on usually Tuesdays, sometimes in the morning, sometimes in the afternoon,
requesting questions. So there's a couple of different ways you
can do it. You can post it online or email
(13:17):
it privately and we may use your question on the air.
You've got mail Chris and Marracca to Iowa. He sent
an email and he says Ben, I'm putting at Ben
in Dannergy. I'm putting a resonant lot up for sale
after my wife and I decided we don't want to
build on the land anymore. And Uh, and Chris says
(13:38):
I have I have it listed in facebook marketplace right now.
Did you use a realtor when you sold the Mallard Mansion,
and do you have any other advice for me trying
to sell it myself? To have some some sweet dough? Uh.
He also says ps go raiders. That cardinal game hurt bad. So, Chris,
(13:59):
first of all, we use a realtor. You can do
it without a realtor, although I don't know much about
facebook marketplace and I'm not sure what the real estate
market is in that platform. And so my advice, if
you really want to go cheap and you really wanna
(14:21):
you want to go by the by the cheapest route possible.
What I would do, since apparently there's no property, it's
just land, but there's still a lot of legal bullshit
you gotta fill out. So my advice would be too
pay a small amount by the hour to a realtor
(14:45):
rather than giving them a commission, a flat commission on land.
You could probably find somebody that would do it for
a nominal amount of money where they have to do
the paperwork. Had A buddy of mine I worked with
in Radio, he actually became a realtor and he's one
of the most successful realtors in the San Fernando Valley
here in L A and it always blew me away
(15:06):
because I was like, you guys, it's a radio guy
and he doesn't really know a lot about the numbers
and all that. And he told me he hired uh,
this assistant, this woman who's really good with the numbers,
and he hired this guy that helps him out with
the paperwork, and so he doesn't do any of the bullcrap.
He just has to worry about making the deal, and
so there are ways you can do that. I would
(15:27):
advise that Chris any tips Danny G on real estate
dealings for Chris and Marraccata Iowa who wants to save
a couple of shekels. Be careful, watch out for squatters.
My mom and Stepdad had a piece of property in
Montana for years. It had nothing built on it. When
they finally went to check out the land, you know,
(15:48):
it was a while they hadn't been there. There was
somebody squatting and living on the land and it turned
up to be a nightmare to get the squatter off
the property. Yeah, we've heard that it's it's it's certain states.
I don't know what it's. Obviously Montana you're talking about.
I don't California. It's it's like the squatter has more
rights than the people that actually own the property. It's
(16:10):
really messed up how they do that, but good luck
to you, Chris. I would attempt to get on the
real estate websites. That's uh, that's the way to go
on and make sure you forward us that address. I'm
gonna bring my tent over there for vacation. Yeah, Danny
G'S gonna have his hunting moon right there in Iowa
and Marracca, Iowa. Come back. It's time from now. I'll
(16:32):
call Mike from fullerton rights and he says, following up
on an answer from last week, you are right not
to read the really offensive land jokes on the fifth hour.
The Guy who was chosen to host jeopardy after Alex
Trebek passed away was quickly fired, Mike points out, after
(16:53):
people dug up old comments he made on a podcast.
And as much as I like the fifth hour, if
you ever read a joke that personally offended me, I
still wouldn't think twice before starting an online petition to
shut your podcast down, Mike. Mike says. Now to my question.
(17:16):
How many people have each of you gotten canceled? If none.
Who would you like to cancel in the future? So
I'll go first. I have not really gotten anyone canceled,
although I did get an NBA player find a game
check of over sixty thousand dollars because of my website,
(17:38):
Ben Mallard Dot Com. Years ago. I've told the story
a few times on the PODCAST, on the radio show.
There was a basketball player named Matrell Sprewell. Pretty good player,
very angry player. He's most known for choking his coach
when he played for the Golden State Warriors, but he
was on the Minnesota Timberwolves. They were playing the clippers.
It was on a Saturday night and the fans were
(18:00):
heckling latrell spree. Well, there was one woman that was
heckling latreill and La Trail decided to scream out when
the crowd was quiet and explain what the woman could
do to Latrell. It involved kneepads and a tongue bath
and needless to say, uh, that that did not go
(18:20):
over well. It got picked up on the live television
broadcast and, uh, let's just say, somebody I know, who
may or may not have been working on the broadcast,
let me know about it. I wrote a story about
it on my website and uh, the N B A
was there were fans of my website. They read about
(18:41):
it on my website and ended up finding it. They
originally suspended him for a game. Latrell spree well and
they ended up taking the suspension away, but they find
him a game check because of that and it would
not have happened. It would not have happened without that story.
The other part of that which was great, I had
a buddy of mine who was an NBA executive for
(19:04):
for a team and I explained the situation and he
told me, because this happened on a Saturday, he said, Ben,
nothing's gonna Happen on Sunday. Nothing ever happens in the NBA,
the NFL or Major League baseball on Saturday or Sunday.
All the executives go out to Long Island, they go
(19:24):
out to the Hampton's, they go upstate, they go downstate,
but they're not at the office. And he's right. Nothing
happens on the weekends. All these decisions are Monday through Friday.
The League offices shut down in the NBA on it
was a Monday evening. They announced the punishment for Spreedwell, Danny,
have you gotten anyone canceled or would you like to
(19:46):
get someone canceled? I have never gotten anybody canceled. Not
your style. I can write a kid yellow detention for him,
but even that was hard. Yeah, alright, so, yeah, you
punished the kids. Yeah, kids have to explain to their parents. Well,
you Gott what did you do? Shame on you. I'm
smiling and having fun there at the school way more
(20:08):
than I'm writing tickets. I got mail, yea, I got mail. Yea. Oh,
we sailor to George, George, George, George, George, George, George, George, George, Vancouver,
British Columbia. Ever been to John Cole? That's right, Vancouver
(20:32):
is beautiful. I've never been there, but I've seen lots
of photos and videos and looks like an amazing place. Van.
I would love to go there as well. Yeah, I
would like to get there. He says he's been listening
for five plus years. George, you guys are the best,
as you know, George, the best means as good as
all the rest of all, except that, as a compliment,
(20:52):
I would say a Good Friday guest for the fifth
hour would be sean the Hood Guy. He is a beauty,
George says. Well, I'm a fan of Sean the Hood
Guy as well. I'm bummed out we didn't get to
meet him at that Mallard meet and reet, but hopefully
next year when we do another one in L A,
in the L A area, we'll be able to meet
Sean the Hood Guy, says. This past Sunday into Monday,
(21:17):
the First Hour Baltimore Crows. Maybe that's why they didn't
cut the check. Beautiful, he says. I love it when
you bust looney's, Arnie's and Jonas balls. Signed George, go
hard on a guy in Van coouver. Well, George, thank
you for listening. Five years, where does the time go?
(21:41):
Goes by pretty quick and I still attack Looney, even
though he does not work for the company anymore. And
I am still fascinated the fact that Arnie, Arnie Spanier,
a veteran talk to your host, is afraid of the
Mallard militia. That fascinates me about Arnie. Uh and Jonas,
now a big morning host. Love, love goofing on Jonas
(22:03):
and it's good to see him now that I'm back
in studio. Half the time I see Jonas half the
week and I see him and Lavar Arrington and those guys,
and so it's nice to see them as we are
ships passing in the middle of the night literally. Why
don't we do one more and uh, I know you
have places going, things to do, Danny G. is that accurate?
(22:24):
Is that correct? Would that be fair? Yeah, it's another
day at the studios today. Alright. So last one, nick
in Wisconsin. Right, so he says Benn and Danny G.
So let's play start, bench cut food edition. I actually
like this. I say this as my closer, because this
is a version of F Mary kill, the food version,
(22:47):
and this is a good, good deal by Nick. Good
job by you, nick. I give you a gold star
next to your name. Thumbs up. So Nick in wisconsins
is Benn and Dang. Let's play start, bench cut food edition. China,
these Mexican and Italian food. You make the call. What
do you do? All right, start means you get that
(23:08):
food whenever, bench means you get it only sometimes, and
cut means you can never consume the food again. Holy Cannoli. Alright,
so this is very difficult. These are tremendous food groups,
cultural food groups, Chinese food, Mexican food and Italian food.
(23:29):
But I have decided in this game of start bench
and cut my starter, Viva Mexico. I'm going with the
Mexican food. That is my starter. I love Mexican food.
A very lucky to live in California, which is really
just like northern Mexico, uh, and they have a tremendous
(23:50):
Mexican food here. So somebody talented cooks and chefs and whatnot,
and restaurants and just wonderful. So I go and this
you can eat tacos one day, burritos the next. There's
so many different options with the Mexican food, Spicy and
get mild. So I'm going to Mexican food now the
number two. See that this is where it gets really hard,
(24:13):
because you can never eat one of these foods again, Damn.
But I'm gonna put it. I'M gonna put Italian as
my as my bench, and Italian is gonna be my
my bench, and that means I'm gonna say bye bye
to Chinese food. And I love the Chinese food, but
(24:35):
I gotta say goodbye to it. And the reason I'm
gonna say goodbye to it, Danny, is because when I
eat Chinese food, it often does not fill me up,
and so when I eat a hearty Italian meal or
a nice big Mexican meal, I feel full. Uh. And
and also, I go to a Mexican restaurant, free chips.
(24:55):
I go to an Italian restaurant, they've got bread on
the table and if they don't, I walk out. I
go to a Chinese restaurant. What do they have on
the table? Nothing, they got like soy sauce or something
like that. So I'm taking the Mexican food as my ace,
I'm taking the Italian as my closer, occasional closer, and
then I say bye bye to the Chinese food. What
(25:15):
about you, Danny? Play the game now. What a great
game this is. Start Bench or cut Italian, Mexican Chinese food? Wow,
great question. This is a tough one and I like
that we have different lineups here. I'M gonna have to
start Chinese food. Yeah, and the reason why is because
panda express is in our rotation almost every week. But
(25:38):
is that actually really Chinese food? Americanized Chinese food, American
Chinese food, but I think it's still counts because also
we love Thai in Japanese. I would include that in
that category. But but I would like, uh, some good
Sushi Rolls, good Japanese restaurant, a good Thai restaurant. That's
(26:01):
gotta be in the mix. Mexican food, I would just
bench for a little while. Taco night at our Casa
is one of the best nights there is. I can't
imagine living without that. And I hate to kill my heritage,
my Siciliano heritage. You can't, you you have relatives turning
over in their grave. Danny, you can't do this. But
(26:24):
here's the thing. I've eaten enough Italian food to last
two lifetimes. So I've already had my fill of its,
starting from when grandma g used to make the pasta
from scratch and the bread from scratch and have get
togethers every Sunday. Oh the smell insider kitchen ben I
(26:46):
mean I saw relatives I hadn't seen in weeks and
they would come over just for the food. Dating back
to when I was a little kid, I've had real
Italian food. So I think because of that I could
kill it and maybe not killed myself. She died of
a heart attack, unfortunately, and you know why. She had
Marinara sauce in her vein. You got rid of the
(27:08):
blood with the BARONET. Well, that's a fair point. You
have eating a lot of Italian food, but you think
of the diversity the Italian lineup, with the Raviolie, the
different pastas, the beef dishes. I mean you can go
any direction with that. What's your go to? It at
Panda Express? What's your go to? Because I was an
orange chicken guy with Beijing beef. That was my ya.
(27:30):
I love that Beijing beef as well. I like the
chicken and green beans, the good one, and I love
the orange chicken, like a lot of people. But the key, Danny,
as you know, is you gotta make sure it's fresh.
You don't want to go when it's like the last
couple of pieces of orange chicken it's sitting around, it
get soggy. Who wants that? No veteran move. You tell
(27:53):
them all wait until you bring out another hot dish. Yeah,
that's the way to do it. And John Real quick says,
do you ever think Kyler Murray is just waiting for
the moment to kick your ass for what you say?
I'm not not too worried about Kyler and even if
he tried to kick my ass. I don't think you
could reach my ass uh, and and he doesn't even
(28:13):
know about me because I'm not on twitch and I'm
not playing video games. So I don't think Kyler even
knows who I am. So I think we're good on that,
although I understand he does go on twitter. It's probably
seen some of those videos. All right, we'll get out
on that, Danny G. Sunday, Sunday. I know I'll be
back after all these NFL Games, after that Sunday night
forty nine or Bronco game, back in the radio studio.
(28:36):
What do you have going on today? How can people
follow you? Danny g? This is where I always say
I'm gonna go in for the very fun Covino and
rich show. This is gonna be the last Sunday Covino
and rich show, so that's gonna be awesome. Of course,
the new weekday show for them starts tomorrow on Monday
at two PM west coast time, and Rich Fox foot
(29:00):
all Sunday. That should be a cool show because they're
going to direct their regular audience to their new Monday
program and then right after that to lead into your
first show of the week, which is Chris Plankett, Arnie Spaniard,
awesome and and I'll be back, as if we said
there late night on the overnight. A new week is
(29:20):
upon us, so have a great rest of your day
enjoy the football. Thank you for continuing to support this podcast,
even as we've crossed the Rubicon into football season, and
we will catch you next time, same podcast, same download
the whole thing later. SKATER POPULATION
Host
Ben Maller
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