October 9, 2022 • 41 mins
Ben Maller is in the studio with Danny G. and they're having some podcast fun with the mail bag for your Sunday! All questions sent in by P1's of the #MallerMilitia! Download, subscribe, and remember that sharing is caring (unless it's an STD.) Follow Danny G. @DannyGradio and Ben on Twitter @BenMaller and listen to the original terrestrial radio edition of "Ben Maller Show," Monday-Friday on Fox Sports Radio, 2a-6a ET, 11p-3a PT!
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:02):
If you thought four hours a day, minutes a week
was enough, I think again. He's the last remnants of
the old republic, a sole fashion of fairness. He treats
crackheads in the ghetto gutter the same as the rich
pill poppers in the penthouse. The Clearinghouse of hot takes
break free for something special. The Fifth Hour with Ben
(00:24):
Maller starts right now in the air everywhere and welcome
into the podcast Ojo The Fifth Hour with Ben Mallard
and Danny g Radio. It's that favorite time of the weekend.
The mail Bag. Yeahlbag. How exciting is that? Oh my god?
(00:50):
It's suit asked Ben. Has always been my favorite feature. No, no, no,
this is the mail boy. This is not asked Ben.
This is nothing like spend it all people. No, no, no, no,
no no. This is the complete opposite. This is the mailbag.
This is totally different content right now, okay, just package differently. No,
(01:12):
there's no new packaging at all. This is an entirely
new concept. No one else has ever had this idea.
It is an amazing bit that we have here. Mailbag.
The bid is Danny. People send virtual mail in and
then we read the mail Even though it's digital mail.
(01:34):
And even former President Donald Trump. You know what he
said about the mailbag. You're very special, that's right. He
said special. And he told me to pass this message
under you, Danny. He didn't say very very special. No, no,
he didn't say that, but he said that you are,
that's what he said. And he also said, please don't
be rude, come on now, okay, quiet, quiet, that's right.
(01:58):
He also said I should get a big fat raise. Well,
was you wrong? That never happened. Yeah, well, you know,
we all need to laugh. That's what he also said.
After he said that, he said, I'm joking, and he
said I don't look so bad right now after the
Biden gas tacts and all that. Anyway, all right, this
is not a political sort just I just can't calm down.
(02:20):
But it is the mail bag, and there's only one
way to start the mail bags, trying to lower our
rating to four point seven. I don't want that, I know,
I know. Calm that everything, you'll be okay. Please, no,
it's okay, and it will be okay. Calm that alright,
then so let's shot. Okay, we will and uh way
we go, Ohio, Wow, it's uh thank you Ohio. All
(02:56):
right to it. We got mail and we start out
with Pierre for East of the Rockies. It's a great
tribute to the George Norry. Now, last week there were
we were doing a bit could anybody guess my Halloween costume?
And Pierre from the East of the Rocky says, first off,
to answer your question to my question from last week,
(03:16):
I would guess that you are dressing up as a
chicken finger or chicken tender, and Mrs Mallard will be
dressing up as a container of raising kanes dipping sauce.
So this is this is tremendous peer In fact, this
is such a good idea. It's not what I was
going to dress up as, but it's such a great
idea that I actually messaged my wife while she was
(03:39):
at work. I said, this is a great idea. You
gotta hear what this guy Pierre came up with. And
she's she laughed, she knows how addicted I am to
that raising kines. And she said, that's a great idea.
And but unfortunately it's too late along in the process
for this year. But next year, Danny, we might have
to go raising kinestein costume. I might have to do
(03:59):
that with the wife. We might have to have that happen,
and well, yeah, we have to get the side of bread.
That's right, the Texas toast? Is that what they call
the Texas Toast? Right? All right? Add Pier says. For
this week's question, he says, will there be a max
limit put on the wager ring of the high stakes
(04:19):
cornhole competition at the Mallard Halloween party this year? That's
a question. A question B What on the grittle menu?
What is on the grittle menu at the party? Well,
my wife is the social butterfly. She is the party planner.
I just kind of go along with crap. That's my
job in this relationship. And she plans parties and then
(04:40):
I get to invite a few of my radio friends,
and then she invites her friends, and then we have
mutual friends and things like that. So there's that, and
it's not really cornhole. Although I will dominate Danny. I
will kick your ascid cornhole. I'll tell you all right
now if you come to the Halloween party, so be
prepared on that. But also we've got this left right
center game and that's the game. But there's really no
(05:02):
way to cheat at that game. You just gotta play
it straight up. It's left right center. That's a fun game.
We gotta play that. So make sure if you're listening
to this and you're coming to the ugly not the
ugly sweat of the Halloween Park, make sure to bring
dollar bills, dollar bills, dollar bills, dollar bills, dollar bills.
So whenever you and I hang out and we have
a big stack of dollar bills, just tell the girls
(05:25):
that we're playing left right center exactly. That's it missing.
We're just trying trying to win a couple of bucks.
You know, a couple of boys gamble, and that's what
men do. We gamble. All right, come back, pay attention.
It's sign from now call. Next up is Chris and
Mary Cocoa. I always just say Mallard and Danny G.
I don't have a question, but thought you would enjoy
(05:45):
these pictures from my local radio station k m a Q.
I had to do a thirty minute guest spot to
talk about my involvement with the city park board and
snap them afterwards. The state is a literal time capsule
from the nineteen fifties and look and feel hope you
(06:07):
and Danny G. Enjoy, he says, ps Go Raiders and Danny,
I made sure to send these photos over to you,
and uh, yeah, it's it's pretty cool. I noticed in
the studio it looks like those are cards. To me,
there's cart racks and c D racks, which is both
(06:30):
used when we were kids. We did this is k
M a q A MT twenty and ninety five point
one on the FM dial Marraccada, Iowa, and both stations simula.
They simulcast each other for about half of the the
broadcast day. So yeah, that's that's pretty pretty neat it
(06:55):
As a radio nerd, it's it's it's cool to check
these things out. I years ago, when I did a
college football game in Norman, Oklahoma, I had to record
this one hour syndicated like football thing that I a
college football show that I was doing it. I really
like it, but we had to we were on the
road and we had to go to the local radio station,
(07:15):
so we went to one in Norman, Oklahoma, and it
was like right out of The Simpsons, Danny. It was
like they had this massive radio tower, you know, flat Oklahoma.
It's a massive radio tower, and then they had like
this little trailer where the radio station was, and I
was like, ohly crap, what am I doing here? That
reminds me. I'm not sure if I ever told you
(07:36):
about the radio station. I went to visit a buddy
because he was board operating the station he worked for
was put inside an old bomb shelter in Modesto, California.
Is that right? It was the creepiest looking thing you
could ever imagine. They had nice studios, nice equipment, but
it all looked like early fifties from the carpet to
(08:00):
the furniture. Uh. The actual electronics were nice, the actual shelter,
the like the door. He showed me what it looked like. Ye,
I mean, God, our country was spooked back then, right, yeah, yeah,
everyone thought they were in any moment the nuclear bomb
was gonna be shot and that was it, go to dynamite.
(08:23):
It was end times. I'm looking at the transmitter, I'm
looking at the power. It's a five radio station Marricoco, Iowa.
Five watts. But it reaches during the daytime. It reaches Davenport,
which is I guess the big city, Uh, Davenport, It
reaches Dubuque, Iowa. It's just on the fringes. It can.
(08:43):
It does not reach Iowa City. And I don't even
want to look at the night time because the nighttime
there are a hundred and thirty five watts. I have
light bulbs that have more watts. And I mean, let's
be let's be honest here. But but that's cool. That's
a local local a d oh, and I support that.
I love the fact. I remember when I got into
(09:05):
the business, Danny and I talked to these old DJs
and they worked at all these small stations like places
in Marricca, Iowa, and they bounced around and there's no
way to do that. You haven't been able to do
that in thirty five years in radio at least. And um,
but that used to be how the business work. You
bounce around from little station to little station, and that's
the way you did it. So, you know what, that
(09:27):
decor reminds me of that movie Blast from the Past,
remember that with Brendan Fraser. And you know what, I
gotta I gotta vibe to the Rick Dy's board. Vibe.
I got a little bit Rick Dy's old school board.
Anything that had a tube. He wanted it. Yeah, yeah,
he loved that. He did not like the new digital
(09:48):
stuff that came in at the end of his run
to Kiss FM in l A uh that that also
reminded me of it all right. Next up, I got mail, yea,
I got mail yea great p one Brigadier General in
the Malle Militia Jason from Rocky Mount, Virginia. He says, Hey, guys,
this question may have been asked before, but what was
(10:10):
your first ever paying job and what was your starting
pay rate? My first job, I was delivering the Irvine
World News, a defunct newspaper when I was growing up
in Irvine, and I tossed the newspaper. My mom drove
me around. I didn't even have a car and driving.
I tried to do it on my bike, but there
(10:31):
were too many newspapers. I couldn't do it on my bike,
so I had my mom drive me around. But I
got paid a weekly stipend and then I had to
get you know, you try to you work people for
this the tips around Christmas. But I didn't get very much.
I'm trying to remember what I think it was like,
maybe like fifty bucks a week. It was really low.
I mean, it's a long time ago, so it was
(10:52):
it was not very much. What about you, Danny g Yeah,
also delivering newspapers. My family moved from l A to
the Bay A back to where my mom grew up
in San Jose, and my cousin threw a paper route
for the San Jose Mercury News. Cool, and he would
bribe me with baseball, basketball, football cards and he'd throw
(11:13):
me five ten dollar bills to help him throw the route.
So that was the first time ever made money off
of a job. He's San Jose Mercury, which is still around,
unlike the newspaper that I delivered, which is not not
around anymore. Next up, Barry right Sin from Nashville. He says,
(11:35):
Yo yo mob Benny. I don't recall this question being
asked before I apologize if I missed it. I am
curious how long ago was it when you first started
using your catchphrase in the air everywhere? And how did
it come about that you came up with that slogan?
All right, so Verry, First of all, I'm really bad
(11:55):
with dates. I think I've only been at Fox Sports
Radio for like five years. I've been there over twenty years,
so I'm really better. I think everyone's around my age,
even when they're really young or really old. I think
I'm really bad with that stuff. So I don't know
exactly when I started using it. It was at Fox
Sports Radio. I didn't use it before Fox Sports Radio.
It was early on in my run, so anywhere from
(12:16):
like two thousand one to two thousand four or two
thousand five, somewhere in that area. So it's been a
long time I've been using it. And in the early days.
This is gonna shock people because I do a lot
of the same bits over and over, but I would
experiment with different things. When I started on the weekends,
I was doing the weekend overnight show. We were on
(12:38):
No Affiliates. We had nobody listening other than Cowboy John
Brad and Doc Mike. They were the only ones in
Pete and Pittsburgh. And so I would just try different crap.
And I was just throwing spaghetti against the wall seeing
what would stick. And I drove in and people say,
I got that from a cartoon. I guess that used that,
But I did not get that from a cartoon. I
(12:58):
just I said it one night on a Saturday night,
late at night, I blurted it out and I got
some good feedback. And since we all have a little
self esteem. You know how it works, dandy, right, You
get good feedback. You're like, hey, people like that, Let
me do that again. And I did, and it just
kind of became my thing. It became my stick, and
(13:19):
so I've used it ever since then and I will
continue to use it as long as I am giving
access to one of these big microphones. And it's just
kind of how it happens. It was not when I
said it the first time. I was like, all right, whatever,
you know, and try something else next hour. But people
really liked it. They thought it was good. It clicked,
(13:39):
and and now it'll forever be attached to the network.
It will be on my tombstone someday. You ever think
the network would come this far? Oh my god, no,
I we were when we started. ESPN Radio is the giant, right,
They were the mother ship everyone wanted to be, you know,
ESPN Radio was all it could be. And they're a
little piss ants now compared to our network. I know.
(14:01):
It is stunning. I am so proud of Fox Sports Radio.
It is amazing because when we started, there were other
networks that were around. There was I think, I don't know,
I don't think sports fan radio is around, but the
sporting news radio there were I remember that there were
a couple other networks and we were low on the
(14:21):
totem poll, right. We were like, you didn't have any affiliates.
People didn't like that, didn't take us seriously, and and
so to see where we are right now, it's awesome.
I mean, I'm so happy, so proud of everyone that's
worked here over the years at Fox Sports Radio. Because
in the early days it did we were questioning whether
we were going to even make it. I was like, oh,
maybe I'll get a job back in local radio. I
(14:43):
don't know this because there were rumors because we didn't
have a lot of affiliates and there were a lot
of changes that were made at the network. And to
go from that toiates, I know, we when I started,
I didn't start the first like month of Fox SPO.
I was hired like a month or so after the
(15:03):
network started, and I was the first weekend. They didn't
have any weekend programming when they started because they didn't
have any affiliates, So what do you need programming for? Um?
But they we had. I was the first overnight guy,
and I had update shifts and things, so there was
a lot of a lot of crap that I had
going on. And we were on in Binghamton, New York, Pittsburgh,
(15:28):
and and we had an affiliate in Michigan, but it
wasn't Detroit. It was like outside of Detroit. But that
was about it. We had, like there were a few
other really small radio stations. Wow. So it's it's pretty
crazy to think where we are today compared to where
we were back then. We got this whole podcast crap
that we've gotten out, Danny right, like it's a wild Well,
(15:51):
it's really scary when you think about it. You went
from Milli Vanilly to Pitbull Mr Worldwide. Yeah, there's no
stop in the train. The train is going. Uh. Next
up on the old mail bag, come back touch It's
(16:11):
Si from mail Call Mike from Fullerton Rights. And he says,
first of all, I will like to thank Pierre for
changing locations every mail bag to spare us all from
boring Pro Basketball Hall of Fame factoids. Kudos to you, sir.
By the way, Mike, did you know that Muffett McGraw
is enshrined in the Pro Basketball Hall of Fame? Did
(16:32):
you know that? Yeah? Anyway, Mike, says, I have a
short question for each of you, Danny, G who do
you like more Covino Rich? That's pretty funny. Yeah, it's
a loaded question right there. That is a loaded question,
(16:56):
and Kennon will be used against you if you actually
answer the question, Danny, I will say this, um Covino's
personality probably match his mind a little more because he's
he's more laid back in the studio, whereas Rich is
more like a chihuahua. And I mean he jokes about
this himself. He'll pace back and forth in the hallway
(17:18):
during the commercial breaks, and he's always in and out
of the studios, and he's he's very positive, and he's
got a ton of energy. No, you should have the
nervous hearts. On Friday's show, he drank not one, but
two coffees, two iced coffees. He's a guy bend. He
should never be allowed to drink one coffee at all ever.
(17:39):
And so I love his energy, but sometimes it's like
a puppy. Yeah yeah, so I I would say there's
a term for that. It's called the Ferman, the Andy Ferman. Right,
Rich is like Andy Ferman a little bit. Is that
what you're saying I want a mature guy. He is
auntie and he brings that energy to the airwaves, which
(18:02):
is really good for all air but off the air. Yeah,
he can't really sit still, and so Covino, I think
is more like me as far as sitting still and
only getting up occasionally. And uh, we channel our energy
to the airways, whereas Rich as nothing but energy. I
(18:22):
like it though. There is not a day where any
of us can lag because rich will, you know, bring
us out of our shell for sure. Yeah, I'm I'm
more like you and Conveno. I don't really leave the
studio much. I'm like I, I sit my ask down
and I just kind of do my thing. You used
to do laps I did. I did back in the day.
I was so I was so paranoid about losing weight
(18:43):
and all that. He would walk around the building. But
I don't do that anymore. Now I'm just a lump.
I just sit there and I'll get out one So
I could I go to the gym and I get
my workout in there. I figure I've as long as
I maintain my weight. Now I'm in in decent shape,
so I can just keep doing that. Uh. And Mike
also says Ben on the weekday radio show, you sometimes
(19:03):
say that you don't need to take calls. You have
plenty of content. I've yet to hear a whole show
with no callers, So I'm curious what kind of bonus
content we're missing out on. Do you always have extra
monologues or stories prepared in case the phones are down?
Or is it bullshit? And by the fourth hour you'd
(19:26):
have to resort to announcing the next day's starting lineup
or starting pitchers for every team in baseball, just to
fill the time. I was so excited I wanted to
pick more guys. I love it. How dare you? Uh So? No,
I'm not gonna brag or anything like that, but I
am I a hyper preparer. And the reason I'm a
(19:47):
hyper preparer I had a very bad experience Mike early
in my radio career, the first show that I ever did.
I've told this story a few times, but I had
the program director, this guy named Bo Bennett, who was watching,
and I was this is like the opportunity of a lifetime.
L A Radio the number one radio market Los Angeles.
It's not New York, it's l A. Because people in
cars and all that. So number one market, the whole
(20:09):
thing l A. I got an opportunity to a show,
a trial show. So I spent all week preparing for
these monologues. And I just nailed the monologue and I
had nothing else and I figured I'll just take calls,
and no one called because yeah, so I had flop
sw I'm pretty sure I drowned that day and I'm dead,
(20:30):
but I had flops with from from not being prepared,
and so I made a pack with myself that day.
I said, as long as I'm lucky enough to have
one of these jobs, I am never gonna go into
that studio depending on a single fucking caller. Okay, I'm
not because I can't depend on them. Sometimes people call,
sometimes they don't call. This was local radio and now
(20:52):
I'm doing a six hundred affiliates. There's always people calling.
But I was like, you know, I'm never gonna do
this again. And so, uh, do you think you slightly
overcorrected like maybe the NFL is doing with concussions. Yes,
I I wish I could get to a point where
I don't have as much that there's so much stuff
that I never get to that never ends up on
(21:16):
the radio that I have in my back pocket just
in case I I have Roberto or Cooper say hey,
the phones aren't working, you know, or something like that,
or nobody calls. Um. But I've I've never I've never
had to go that far down. But no, I'm I'm
I'm absolutely able to do an entire show without taking
(21:36):
a single call. And and that's that's just the way
I've been preparing. And I've I've done that for twenty
years since I well over twenty years now, since I've
been at Fox. Uh. Mike also says, my guest for
Ben's Halloween costume this year is Larry the Lobster from
SpongeBob SquarePants. Okay, I will reveal, should I do it now?
(21:59):
You want me to real? And uh, you should probably
do the big reveal at the end of the program.
All Right, I'm gonna wait till the end for the
big reveal. Next up on the mail bag is our
Man our Myth, the legend from Colorado. You heard him
on yesterday's show, Adrian in the Mile High City, he says,
(22:21):
Benn in Danny g I enjoyed the conversation last week
about food waste. I'm right here with you guys. Adrian says,
I hate food waste. I'm a frugal guy myself. When
we were on a family cruise this summer, you would
not believe all the food that was wasted on board
the ship. All yeah, I can't imagine because that would
(22:43):
have me crazy. It's all inclusive, right, So you get
you get a plate of burgers, eat one burger. You're like, okay,
I'm good. That's it. Uh And Adrian says, I was
happy to hear, however, that most of the wasted food
on the ship gets ground down to almost a liquid
form and is allowed to be dumped into the ocean
(23:04):
for marine life to eat. Well, that's cool. I didn't
know that. I did not know that either. What do
they do with the human waste though? That? Imagine people
on a one week cruise. How much human ship must
be on that boat. What do they do with that?
They can't drop that, and they probably stir the two
together and they call that fast food. But I'm bumped,
(23:25):
all right, that's funny, all right. He says that George
nori Kt is a character. Fellas. Your conversation on shape
shifting was interesting. I'm getting ready to do my annual
shape shifting here at the end of the month. Be
on the lookout for the next few weeks of Halloween picks.
(23:46):
Uh the return of Bronco Man. All Right, I like
that sure. Hope by the time you dropped this on
a Sunday that Mr Unlimited and the Broncos will have
taken care of the Colts on Thursday night. Injuries have
hit my squad early and off in this season. Well,
also self inflicted wounds. Adrian. You know it's a bad
(24:08):
sign when your squad can't even get a playoff without
a pre snap penalty. That's that's like a Pop Warner
type penalty, and I've seen that happen a lot for
the Broncos this year. He says, I'm looking forward to
Tuesday night, the eleventh, when the Dodgers host Game one
of the NLDS. You know, I got some good coin
on l A winning it all. I'll be bleeding Dodger
(24:31):
blue this postseason. And he says, lastly, I'm a hat guy,
uh like you, the mad Hatter of sports chatter. He says,
check out this Dodger had I got for the platform's
and you can't see this to anybody's got a Dodger
hat and it's it's got like the Dodger logo with
a little green in got a little little green in that.
(24:51):
And Adrian is always so cool. He since got a
beautiful family, and he sent a bunch of of photos
year of his kids. And your wife, says a cardinal fan, Adrian,
what's up with that man? She from Saint Louis. She's
wearing a Saint Louis hat. What's up with that? Damn
(25:12):
red Birds they used to be she's on the juice.
I used to call them the cheating Cardinals, but then
the astros said, hold my beer and uh, and I
even forgot about that whole thing with the Cardinals back
in Dabby, there's some cool photos of corus Field. You've
been there right many times, Danny, And yeah, I've been
there a few times. Yeah, there you go. It's uh,
(25:34):
his lovely bride. Adrian's got his kids, and now I
hope you let your daughter eat the fuci. She had
a lot of mustards that your hot dog or her
mustard or her hotducts covered in mustard. And then your kid,
who's a dead ringer, Like a dead ringer for Adrian.
He's got the the pizza at the at the Rockies game.
And I do like that hat to Adrian's wearing. You
(25:55):
can't see this on the podcast, but he's wearing that
old school I like that old Bronco logo with the
white horse coming out of the d there. I like that.
It's a solid one of those undeniable children where you
could never be like, oh, it's not my baby. Yeah,
you can't say that's the mailman of the pool guy
or the mechanic, that's that's your DNA pal, that's it. Yeah, yeah,
(26:19):
you can't get around that man. She could deny it's
her kid, but you can't deny that your kid. Okay,
it's a it's a it's a weird situation there, all right,
Next up here we go, let's keep the training moving. Mail.
Next up is pat in Madina, Ohio and not Madinada.
(26:41):
Everyone gets it wrong. No worry, he's been, he says,
been in Danny g. Since it is the spooky season,
I have some questions about your horror movie favorites. Do
you guys have a favorite horror movie? If I may
be so bold as to ask for a second one,
I always loved going to haunted houses, as a kid
(27:02):
growing up in Ohio, did you or Danny ever go
to a haunted house scary hay rides as a kid, Yes,
although I was always freaked out by the the haunted houses,
but usually these were like Halloween carnivals that they had. Um,
So I recall that, and I'm not a big horror
movie guy. That's just not my genre of movies. So
(27:24):
I recall back in the day when I was younger,
was like Friday with the Big One. I remember, remember that.
Does The Gremlins count as a horror movie? Probably not?
Probably not, But I mean it is kind of like
the attack, you know, don't give them water after midnight whatever,
don't feed him. Uh well, any favorite horror movie, Danny
(27:47):
g that comes to mind? You know, as far as
like slasher movies, I I've never liked those, even when
I was younger, I didn't care for those. But psychological
thrillers I really like. Um there's a movie that's out
right now called The Barbarian and that's a psychological thriller
that was good. I like that. But yeah, but he's saying,
(28:09):
maybe your favorite like growing up as a kid or
going to a haunted house. No, I didn't get to
do that. My mom is so Christian. She did not
partake in Halloween. She thought it was evil. So is
that right? Yeah, she's not alone. There's quite a few
people that that think that way about Halloween. To each
their own. Um, she's just like anything that kind of
(28:31):
is for the devil or where the devil's glorified. I'm
not into that. So horror movies were not really a
thing in our house. She didn't let us watch any
of those, even classics like The Shining. I had to
wait until I was an adult to see that. Yeah,
I've seen some of the classic horror movies, but I'm
not like I don't go out of my way to
(28:52):
to watch them. But thank you, pat In Mdina not
Mdina Madina understand Big Blue from the LBC is Yes,
he says a k the black man hockey fan racist. Well,
(29:14):
he ain't kidding. He loves hockey, even goes and watches
Eddie play adult hockey. That's a dedication. Stop Eddie, I says, question.
What would you do if a previous girlfriend Conquest showed
up at a Mallard meet and greet with a fan
listener of the show, Well, that would be very awkward,
(29:35):
big blue, very very awkward. Uh, I don't I don't
know what I would do, and I would like to
not be in that situation to find out. It would
be uncomfortable. I try to try to brush it off
like I don't really you know, just we're just friends
something like that. Right then, he wouldn't that be the
move to play it off like that? Yeah, the first
thing you need to do is go in for a
(29:56):
really tight hug, grab some math, and then just act
normal after that. That way you break the ice. Yeah,
just break the ice that way. That would be weird.
I did have a someone I didd years ago who
actually lives in Denver, in the Denver area, and she
she messaged me out of the blue saying, hey, I
(30:19):
she's still single. She was on a date and they
were talking about what they were into, and the the
guy said he was a fan of mine, and that
kind of upset her a little bit. I think I
was triggered. Yeah, so she contacted me and I can't
get rid of this guy. Yeah, she thought that was interesting,
haunting me. Uh. I would back in your DJ days, Danny,
(30:44):
any odd things pop up there when you were doing
an appearance and somebody might have shown up that you
might or might not have had some quality time with
in the past. There. I mean, I think too. When
I was programming the hip hop radio station in Ventura,
Santa Barbara, I was on this date and it was
a really pretty blonde girl from Santa Barbara, from their
(31:05):
Christian college there in Santa Barbara. And she loved house
music and dance music. Cool girl, and it was like
a second date with her. I didn't have her come
into the studio, but I needed to stop by to
print out a music log for the guy that was
going to do the evening show so I could go
have dinner with her. So I run inside, print this
(31:25):
music log out, run it into the studio, and as
I walk out the studio doors, my ex is sitting
there in her saturn. She had a red saturn and
she was just hovering outside of the studio doors stoker.
I walk. I try to pretend like I don't see her.
I walked to my car where the date is sitting
(31:48):
in the passenger seat of my car with her window down,
and she looks at me. Hi, it was excited that
I'm back out for the date, and dun, dun, dun dun,
dun dune. The Saturn pulls up to my car are
and she says, aren't you gonna come kiss me? Man? Whoa?
(32:08):
Aren't you gonna even say hi? You're not gonna give
me a kiss. She's saying it loud enough so that
the girl in my car can hear her pulled up
behind my car so that I couldn't get out. It
was a mess. And so then you're forced to explain
this to the new person you're trying to date, so
that that was a fun dinner unless it wasn't. I
bet what a what a pain? And that took is
(32:30):
that is man? I would do a couple more. Blind Scott,
he randomly sent this in It's not really a question,
he says. It's a local story in Boston. He says,
a guy jumped into the Charles River to retrieve his
lost phone. Unfortunately, he did not find his phone. He
found eleven other phones, but not his. Ah is that
(32:52):
this is a news story. That's crazy. That is wow.
And I walked around the Charles River a bunch and
and it's people are running that one thing about Boston.
People are outdoors a lot, not not you know, not
in the winter, obviously, but but in the summer and
the spring and the fall, they're running around and bikes
and all that stuff. And how do your how does
your phone end up in the Charles River? Though I
(33:15):
don't I don't get it all right now, But that's wild.
Eleven Phones, You're a Cool show would be an investigative
show that tells the story of all eleven phones and
how they got there. It sounds like a podcast or
something like that. It sounds like a promo for an
I Heeart podcast exactly three part series as only on
(33:35):
iHeart podcast Network. All right, next time, I Got mail? Yea?
I got mail, yea. Kevin in Kansas right soon, says
near Ben and Danny g. It's obvious that both you
are hard workers. How far back does your work history go?
I loaded play pigeons at a trap club, worked at
a McDonald's, wrote sports for the local paper, and have
(33:59):
my own mowing business, among other jobs in my lifetime.
What jobs did you have in addition to being radio guys?
That's from Kevin in Kansas. Well, Kevin, I, I've been
in radio for a long time. Me and Danny both
started young ages. I started I was nineteen Danny was
younger than I was when he started in radio. Before that,
though I mentioned, I was a newspaper delivery kid when
(34:21):
I was growing up. Most of my work experience was
actually with my parents. My mom ran a mailing service.
She did like mail for realtors and things like that,
when they'd send flyers out back in the days before
the Internet, they'd send flyers out for open houses and
things like that, and we did a lot of that.
It was you know, junk mail, bulk mail, and so
(34:42):
my mom helped had me help her with the business
when I was a kid, and I put a lot
of like stickers on different labels, address labels and whatnot.
Thousands thousands of these things we'd send out. So I
did a lot of that as a kid, and I
worked at the the I did a website, Ben mallary
dot com I had for a long time, and I've
(35:03):
done a few other Internet writing things, but most of
my work is in radio. What about you, Dan? By
the way, what did the homepage of your website look like?
Ben mallard dot com. My my website, I was all
it was. I was aggregating, you know, it looks like
did they have a picture of you though, No, no, no, no,
not really. It was just my name at the top.
(35:24):
And then it was just a bunch of a bunch
of random stories that I would aggregate every day and
nobody else was really doing at the time, and so
I had my own corner of the Internet. There was
no like cool jail shot of you bending down with
your arms crossed. I can, I know, Well, it depends
on a few in a different dimension. Nanny, there were
(35:48):
there was that, and yeah all that stuffact Hollywood head
shot of you on the front page. Oh yeah, No,
I don't think I had any models wearing T shirts
with my name them. I think I had what happened
to that guy? By the way, Oh I know, I know,
you know, much like you. I got my start with
(36:08):
newspaper delivery um from my cousin. I learned how to
throw a paper out, and then my mom moved us
to the central valley where houses were more affordable. So
I was throwing a morning newspaper for the big city,
and then the smaller newspaper was delivered in the afternoon,
so I could do both. I through the morning paper
(36:31):
and the afternoon paper. I gave my mom half of
the money I earned, and then I took the other
half and I bought c d s so that I
could go into the high school radio station in DJ.
So I had to hustle, hustle hard um, you know,
because you had to provide your own music. So then
I moved on to the college radio station, and I
logged my crates and bags of c d s to
(36:54):
the college radio station every Friday night, Come on, pipping off.
We didn't have called R and B band. We called
it the best in soul in hip hop for the nineties.
There you go, How does it make you feel, Danny,
that the oldiest stations are now playing stuff from like
the early nineties and stuff I called it. I knew it.
I knew it was gonna happen because when even when
(37:16):
people were saying, oh, it's a fad, it's a fad,
even at that time, it had been around for twenty
years and some people were still calling it a fad.
And I was like, no, this music is amazing and
it's gonna last forever. I'm gonna be a grandfather on
some classic hip hop station. And I remember people laughing
when I would say that there was gonna be classic
(37:37):
hip hop stations, and now that's a genre, that's an
actual radio format. Now, oh, absolutely absolutely, we do one more.
We gotta get out of here, one more here John
in Northern Colorado. John is a longtime fan of the show.
He says, Ben in, Danny, g do you prefer your
eggs fried, scrambled, or boiled? Well, this is an easy one.
(37:58):
I'm not a big egg guy, but it's gotta be
scrambled or I ain't eating it scrambled all the way.
I'm not doing the boiled. I'm not doing the fried.
I'm doing scrambled. What about you, Danny. I'm gonna have
scrambled eggs as soon as we get done with our podcast,
right now, Ben, One cool thing about my girl. She's
not a huge fan of milk products or milk because
(38:20):
you call it, but she does love scrambled eggs, and
she makes really, really good scrambled eggs. Sometimes throws a
little bit of melted cheese in there, puts the perfect
amount of salt and pepper. Whenever she serves up scrambled
eggs and English muffins, I run as fast as you
can imagine to the table. I right. Well, when I
(38:47):
was a kid, I used to eat breakfast, and my
mom would make omelets with cheese omelets, and I did.
I did like that. I did enjoy that. That was
that was a nice treat back in the Oh, that
sounds good. That sounds good. Yeah it was. It was
really good and really unhealthy for you. But what the hell?
Why not? They only live once? Might as well enjoy
the journey, you know, the destination. All right, we'll get
(39:09):
out of here on that. You know, we need your
big reveal. Oh that's right, that's right. The Halloween costume.
This is a podcast exclusive. Let me know when you're
ready for the two dollar drum roll. Alright, no one
else has this content. Hit the drum roll, Danny J.
Here we go, and I will be dressing up as
(39:33):
PBS celebrity Bob Ross. I will be dressed up as
Bob Ross. There are no mistakes, Danny, just happy little accidents. Wow,
it won't just be coop that I'm smoking within your backyard,
I'll be I'll be painting a mosaic, is what I
will be doing with those little trees and on the
(39:57):
hippie lettuce. At your party, I'll be hanging out. Ninet
seventies Style nineteen eighties, Bob Ross, smoke weed, the shirt,
the jeans, the whole thing. I got it all going on.
We'll get out of here. You're off today, Danny, Right,
you're done, my day off. Get to kick back, watch
some NFL and wait for my Raiders on Monday night.
(40:18):
All right, have a great rest of your day. I'll
be back on the radio tonight, the Magic Radio Box
as we will kick off the festivities at eleven pm
in the West on Sunday, two am in the East,
and we'll go all the way to six am in
the East and we'll talk all things ANDFL and the
baseball playoffs. What a wonderful time of the year it
(40:42):
is to do this and to be a sports fan.
We got a lot on our plate. We'll get to
it all and we look forward to that and we'll
catch you next time. We're out like a pig snout.
That's a new one.
If you thought four hours a day, minutes a week
was enough, I think again. He's the last remnants of
the old republic, a sole fashion of fairness. He treats
crackheads in the ghetto gutter the same as the rich
pill poppers in the penthouse. The Clearinghouse of hot takes
break free for something special. The Fifth Hour with Ben
(00:24):
Maller starts right now in the air everywhere and welcome
into the podcast Ojo The Fifth Hour with Ben Mallard
and Danny g Radio. It's that favorite time of the weekend.
The mail Bag. Yeahlbag. How exciting is that? Oh my god?
(00:50):
It's suit asked Ben. Has always been my favorite feature. No, no, no,
this is the mail boy. This is not asked Ben.
This is nothing like spend it all people. No, no, no, no,
no no. This is the complete opposite. This is the mailbag.
This is totally different content right now, okay, just package differently. No,
(01:12):
there's no new packaging at all. This is an entirely
new concept. No one else has ever had this idea.
It is an amazing bit that we have here. Mailbag.
The bid is Danny. People send virtual mail in and
then we read the mail Even though it's digital mail.
(01:34):
And even former President Donald Trump. You know what he
said about the mailbag. You're very special, that's right. He
said special. And he told me to pass this message
under you, Danny. He didn't say very very special. No, no,
he didn't say that, but he said that you are,
that's what he said. And he also said, please don't
be rude, come on now, okay, quiet, quiet, that's right.
(01:58):
He also said I should get a big fat raise. Well,
was you wrong? That never happened. Yeah, well, you know,
we all need to laugh. That's what he also said.
After he said that, he said, I'm joking, and he
said I don't look so bad right now after the
Biden gas tacts and all that. Anyway, all right, this
is not a political sort just I just can't calm down.
(02:20):
But it is the mail bag, and there's only one
way to start the mail bags, trying to lower our
rating to four point seven. I don't want that, I know,
I know. Calm that everything, you'll be okay. Please, no,
it's okay, and it will be okay. Calm that alright,
then so let's shot. Okay, we will and uh way
we go, Ohio, Wow, it's uh thank you Ohio. All
(02:56):
right to it. We got mail and we start out
with Pierre for East of the Rockies. It's a great
tribute to the George Norry. Now, last week there were
we were doing a bit could anybody guess my Halloween costume?
And Pierre from the East of the Rocky says, first off,
to answer your question to my question from last week,
(03:16):
I would guess that you are dressing up as a
chicken finger or chicken tender, and Mrs Mallard will be
dressing up as a container of raising kanes dipping sauce.
So this is this is tremendous peer In fact, this
is such a good idea. It's not what I was
going to dress up as, but it's such a great
idea that I actually messaged my wife while she was
(03:39):
at work. I said, this is a great idea. You
gotta hear what this guy Pierre came up with. And
she's she laughed, she knows how addicted I am to
that raising kines. And she said, that's a great idea.
And but unfortunately it's too late along in the process
for this year. But next year, Danny, we might have
to go raising kinestein costume. I might have to do
(03:59):
that with the wife. We might have to have that happen,
and well, yeah, we have to get the side of bread.
That's right, the Texas toast? Is that what they call
the Texas Toast? Right? All right? Add Pier says. For
this week's question, he says, will there be a max
limit put on the wager ring of the high stakes
(04:19):
cornhole competition at the Mallard Halloween party this year? That's
a question. A question B What on the grittle menu?
What is on the grittle menu at the party? Well,
my wife is the social butterfly. She is the party planner.
I just kind of go along with crap. That's my
job in this relationship. And she plans parties and then
(04:40):
I get to invite a few of my radio friends,
and then she invites her friends, and then we have
mutual friends and things like that. So there's that, and
it's not really cornhole. Although I will dominate Danny. I
will kick your ascid cornhole. I'll tell you all right
now if you come to the Halloween party, so be
prepared on that. But also we've got this left right
center game and that's the game. But there's really no
(05:02):
way to cheat at that game. You just gotta play
it straight up. It's left right center. That's a fun game.
We gotta play that. So make sure if you're listening
to this and you're coming to the ugly not the
ugly sweat of the Halloween Park, make sure to bring
dollar bills, dollar bills, dollar bills, dollar bills, dollar bills.
So whenever you and I hang out and we have
a big stack of dollar bills, just tell the girls
(05:25):
that we're playing left right center exactly. That's it missing.
We're just trying trying to win a couple of bucks.
You know, a couple of boys gamble, and that's what
men do. We gamble. All right, come back, pay attention.
It's sign from now call. Next up is Chris and
Mary Cocoa. I always just say Mallard and Danny G.
I don't have a question, but thought you would enjoy
(05:45):
these pictures from my local radio station k m a Q.
I had to do a thirty minute guest spot to
talk about my involvement with the city park board and
snap them afterwards. The state is a literal time capsule
from the nineteen fifties and look and feel hope you
(06:07):
and Danny G. Enjoy, he says, ps Go Raiders and Danny,
I made sure to send these photos over to you,
and uh, yeah, it's it's pretty cool. I noticed in
the studio it looks like those are cards. To me,
there's cart racks and c D racks, which is both
(06:30):
used when we were kids. We did this is k
M a q A MT twenty and ninety five point
one on the FM dial Marraccada, Iowa, and both stations simula.
They simulcast each other for about half of the the
broadcast day. So yeah, that's that's pretty pretty neat it
(06:55):
As a radio nerd, it's it's it's cool to check
these things out. I years ago, when I did a
college football game in Norman, Oklahoma, I had to record
this one hour syndicated like football thing that I a
college football show that I was doing it. I really
like it, but we had to we were on the
road and we had to go to the local radio station,
(07:15):
so we went to one in Norman, Oklahoma, and it
was like right out of The Simpsons, Danny. It was
like they had this massive radio tower, you know, flat Oklahoma.
It's a massive radio tower, and then they had like
this little trailer where the radio station was, and I
was like, ohly crap, what am I doing here? That
reminds me. I'm not sure if I ever told you
(07:36):
about the radio station. I went to visit a buddy
because he was board operating the station he worked for
was put inside an old bomb shelter in Modesto, California.
Is that right? It was the creepiest looking thing you
could ever imagine. They had nice studios, nice equipment, but
it all looked like early fifties from the carpet to
(08:00):
the furniture. Uh. The actual electronics were nice, the actual shelter,
the like the door. He showed me what it looked like. Ye,
I mean, God, our country was spooked back then, right, yeah, yeah,
everyone thought they were in any moment the nuclear bomb
was gonna be shot and that was it, go to dynamite.
(08:23):
It was end times. I'm looking at the transmitter, I'm
looking at the power. It's a five radio station Marricoco, Iowa.
Five watts. But it reaches during the daytime. It reaches Davenport,
which is I guess the big city, Uh, Davenport, It
reaches Dubuque, Iowa. It's just on the fringes. It can.
(08:43):
It does not reach Iowa City. And I don't even
want to look at the night time because the nighttime
there are a hundred and thirty five watts. I have
light bulbs that have more watts. And I mean, let's
be let's be honest here. But but that's cool. That's
a local local a d oh, and I support that.
I love the fact. I remember when I got into
(09:05):
the business, Danny and I talked to these old DJs
and they worked at all these small stations like places
in Marricca, Iowa, and they bounced around and there's no
way to do that. You haven't been able to do
that in thirty five years in radio at least. And um,
but that used to be how the business work. You
bounce around from little station to little station, and that's
the way you did it. So, you know what, that
(09:27):
decor reminds me of that movie Blast from the Past,
remember that with Brendan Fraser. And you know what, I
gotta I gotta vibe to the Rick Dy's board. Vibe.
I got a little bit Rick Dy's old school board.
Anything that had a tube. He wanted it. Yeah, yeah,
he loved that. He did not like the new digital
(09:48):
stuff that came in at the end of his run
to Kiss FM in l A uh that that also
reminded me of it all right. Next up, I got mail, yea,
I got mail yea great p one Brigadier General in
the Malle Militia Jason from Rocky Mount, Virginia. He says, Hey, guys,
this question may have been asked before, but what was
(10:10):
your first ever paying job and what was your starting
pay rate? My first job, I was delivering the Irvine
World News, a defunct newspaper when I was growing up
in Irvine, and I tossed the newspaper. My mom drove
me around. I didn't even have a car and driving.
I tried to do it on my bike, but there
(10:31):
were too many newspapers. I couldn't do it on my bike,
so I had my mom drive me around. But I
got paid a weekly stipend and then I had to
get you know, you try to you work people for
this the tips around Christmas. But I didn't get very much.
I'm trying to remember what I think it was like,
maybe like fifty bucks a week. It was really low.
I mean, it's a long time ago, so it was
(10:52):
it was not very much. What about you, Danny g Yeah,
also delivering newspapers. My family moved from l A to
the Bay A back to where my mom grew up
in San Jose, and my cousin threw a paper route
for the San Jose Mercury News. Cool, and he would
bribe me with baseball, basketball, football cards and he'd throw
(11:13):
me five ten dollar bills to help him throw the route.
So that was the first time ever made money off
of a job. He's San Jose Mercury, which is still around,
unlike the newspaper that I delivered, which is not not
around anymore. Next up, Barry right Sin from Nashville. He says,
(11:35):
Yo yo mob Benny. I don't recall this question being
asked before I apologize if I missed it. I am
curious how long ago was it when you first started
using your catchphrase in the air everywhere? And how did
it come about that you came up with that slogan?
All right, so Verry, First of all, I'm really bad
(11:55):
with dates. I think I've only been at Fox Sports
Radio for like five years. I've been there over twenty years,
so I'm really better. I think everyone's around my age,
even when they're really young or really old. I think
I'm really bad with that stuff. So I don't know
exactly when I started using it. It was at Fox
Sports Radio. I didn't use it before Fox Sports Radio.
It was early on in my run, so anywhere from
(12:16):
like two thousand one to two thousand four or two
thousand five, somewhere in that area. So it's been a
long time I've been using it. And in the early days.
This is gonna shock people because I do a lot
of the same bits over and over, but I would
experiment with different things. When I started on the weekends,
I was doing the weekend overnight show. We were on
(12:38):
No Affiliates. We had nobody listening other than Cowboy John
Brad and Doc Mike. They were the only ones in
Pete and Pittsburgh. And so I would just try different crap.
And I was just throwing spaghetti against the wall seeing
what would stick. And I drove in and people say,
I got that from a cartoon. I guess that used that,
But I did not get that from a cartoon. I
(12:58):
just I said it one night on a Saturday night,
late at night, I blurted it out and I got
some good feedback. And since we all have a little
self esteem. You know how it works, dandy, right, You
get good feedback. You're like, hey, people like that, Let
me do that again. And I did, and it just
kind of became my thing. It became my stick, and
(13:19):
so I've used it ever since then and I will
continue to use it as long as I am giving
access to one of these big microphones. And it's just
kind of how it happens. It was not when I
said it the first time. I was like, all right, whatever,
you know, and try something else next hour. But people
really liked it. They thought it was good. It clicked,
(13:39):
and and now it'll forever be attached to the network.
It will be on my tombstone someday. You ever think
the network would come this far? Oh my god, no,
I we were when we started. ESPN Radio is the giant, right,
They were the mother ship everyone wanted to be, you know,
ESPN Radio was all it could be. And they're a
little piss ants now compared to our network. I know.
(14:01):
It is stunning. I am so proud of Fox Sports Radio.
It is amazing because when we started, there were other
networks that were around. There was I think, I don't know,
I don't think sports fan radio is around, but the
sporting news radio there were I remember that there were
a couple other networks and we were low on the
(14:21):
totem poll, right. We were like, you didn't have any affiliates.
People didn't like that, didn't take us seriously, and and
so to see where we are right now, it's awesome.
I mean, I'm so happy, so proud of everyone that's
worked here over the years at Fox Sports Radio. Because
in the early days it did we were questioning whether
we were going to even make it. I was like, oh,
maybe I'll get a job back in local radio. I
(14:43):
don't know this because there were rumors because we didn't
have a lot of affiliates and there were a lot
of changes that were made at the network. And to
go from that toiates, I know, we when I started,
I didn't start the first like month of Fox SPO.
I was hired like a month or so after the
(15:03):
network started, and I was the first weekend. They didn't
have any weekend programming when they started because they didn't
have any affiliates, So what do you need programming for? Um?
But they we had. I was the first overnight guy,
and I had update shifts and things, so there was
a lot of a lot of crap that I had
going on. And we were on in Binghamton, New York, Pittsburgh,
(15:28):
and and we had an affiliate in Michigan, but it
wasn't Detroit. It was like outside of Detroit. But that
was about it. We had, like there were a few
other really small radio stations. Wow. So it's it's pretty
crazy to think where we are today compared to where
we were back then. We got this whole podcast crap
that we've gotten out, Danny right, like it's a wild Well,
(15:51):
it's really scary when you think about it. You went
from Milli Vanilly to Pitbull Mr Worldwide. Yeah, there's no
stop in the train. The train is going. Uh. Next
up on the old mail bag, come back touch It's
(16:11):
Si from mail Call Mike from Fullerton Rights. And he says,
first of all, I will like to thank Pierre for
changing locations every mail bag to spare us all from
boring Pro Basketball Hall of Fame factoids. Kudos to you, sir.
By the way, Mike, did you know that Muffett McGraw
is enshrined in the Pro Basketball Hall of Fame? Did
(16:32):
you know that? Yeah? Anyway, Mike, says, I have a
short question for each of you, Danny, G who do
you like more Covino Rich? That's pretty funny. Yeah, it's
a loaded question right there. That is a loaded question,
(16:56):
and Kennon will be used against you if you actually
answer the question, Danny, I will say this, um Covino's
personality probably match his mind a little more because he's
he's more laid back in the studio, whereas Rich is
more like a chihuahua. And I mean he jokes about
this himself. He'll pace back and forth in the hallway
(17:18):
during the commercial breaks, and he's always in and out
of the studios, and he's he's very positive, and he's
got a ton of energy. No, you should have the
nervous hearts. On Friday's show, he drank not one, but
two coffees, two iced coffees. He's a guy bend. He
should never be allowed to drink one coffee at all ever.
(17:39):
And so I love his energy, but sometimes it's like
a puppy. Yeah yeah, so I I would say there's
a term for that. It's called the Ferman, the Andy Ferman. Right,
Rich is like Andy Ferman a little bit. Is that
what you're saying I want a mature guy. He is
auntie and he brings that energy to the airwaves, which
(18:02):
is really good for all air but off the air. Yeah,
he can't really sit still, and so Covino, I think
is more like me as far as sitting still and
only getting up occasionally. And uh, we channel our energy
to the airways, whereas Rich as nothing but energy. I
(18:22):
like it though. There is not a day where any
of us can lag because rich will, you know, bring
us out of our shell for sure. Yeah, I'm I'm
more like you and Conveno. I don't really leave the
studio much. I'm like I, I sit my ask down
and I just kind of do my thing. You used
to do laps I did. I did back in the day.
I was so I was so paranoid about losing weight
(18:43):
and all that. He would walk around the building. But
I don't do that anymore. Now I'm just a lump.
I just sit there and I'll get out one So
I could I go to the gym and I get
my workout in there. I figure I've as long as
I maintain my weight. Now I'm in in decent shape,
so I can just keep doing that. Uh. And Mike
also says Ben on the weekday radio show, you sometimes
(19:03):
say that you don't need to take calls. You have
plenty of content. I've yet to hear a whole show
with no callers, So I'm curious what kind of bonus
content we're missing out on. Do you always have extra
monologues or stories prepared in case the phones are down?
Or is it bullshit? And by the fourth hour you'd
(19:26):
have to resort to announcing the next day's starting lineup
or starting pitchers for every team in baseball, just to
fill the time. I was so excited I wanted to
pick more guys. I love it. How dare you? Uh So? No,
I'm not gonna brag or anything like that, but I
am I a hyper preparer. And the reason I'm a
(19:47):
hyper preparer I had a very bad experience Mike early
in my radio career, the first show that I ever did.
I've told this story a few times, but I had
the program director, this guy named Bo Bennett, who was watching,
and I was this is like the opportunity of a lifetime.
L A Radio the number one radio market Los Angeles.
It's not New York, it's l A. Because people in
cars and all that. So number one market, the whole
(20:09):
thing l A. I got an opportunity to a show,
a trial show. So I spent all week preparing for
these monologues. And I just nailed the monologue and I
had nothing else and I figured I'll just take calls,
and no one called because yeah, so I had flop
sw I'm pretty sure I drowned that day and I'm dead,
(20:30):
but I had flops with from from not being prepared,
and so I made a pack with myself that day.
I said, as long as I'm lucky enough to have
one of these jobs, I am never gonna go into
that studio depending on a single fucking caller. Okay, I'm
not because I can't depend on them. Sometimes people call,
sometimes they don't call. This was local radio and now
(20:52):
I'm doing a six hundred affiliates. There's always people calling.
But I was like, you know, I'm never gonna do
this again. And so, uh, do you think you slightly
overcorrected like maybe the NFL is doing with concussions. Yes,
I I wish I could get to a point where
I don't have as much that there's so much stuff
that I never get to that never ends up on
(21:16):
the radio that I have in my back pocket just
in case I I have Roberto or Cooper say hey,
the phones aren't working, you know, or something like that,
or nobody calls. Um. But I've I've never I've never
had to go that far down. But no, I'm I'm
I'm absolutely able to do an entire show without taking
(21:36):
a single call. And and that's that's just the way
I've been preparing. And I've I've done that for twenty
years since I well over twenty years now, since I've
been at Fox. Uh. Mike also says, my guest for
Ben's Halloween costume this year is Larry the Lobster from
SpongeBob SquarePants. Okay, I will reveal, should I do it now?
(21:59):
You want me to real? And uh, you should probably
do the big reveal at the end of the program.
All Right, I'm gonna wait till the end for the
big reveal. Next up on the mail bag is our
Man our Myth, the legend from Colorado. You heard him
on yesterday's show, Adrian in the Mile High City, he says,
(22:21):
Benn in Danny g I enjoyed the conversation last week
about food waste. I'm right here with you guys. Adrian says,
I hate food waste. I'm a frugal guy myself. When
we were on a family cruise this summer, you would
not believe all the food that was wasted on board
the ship. All yeah, I can't imagine because that would
(22:43):
have me crazy. It's all inclusive, right, So you get
you get a plate of burgers, eat one burger. You're like, okay,
I'm good. That's it. Uh And Adrian says, I was
happy to hear, however, that most of the wasted food
on the ship gets ground down to almost a liquid
form and is allowed to be dumped into the ocean
(23:04):
for marine life to eat. Well, that's cool. I didn't
know that. I did not know that either. What do
they do with the human waste though? That? Imagine people
on a one week cruise. How much human ship must
be on that boat. What do they do with that?
They can't drop that, and they probably stir the two
together and they call that fast food. But I'm bumped,
(23:25):
all right, that's funny, all right. He says that George
nori Kt is a character. Fellas. Your conversation on shape
shifting was interesting. I'm getting ready to do my annual
shape shifting here at the end of the month. Be
on the lookout for the next few weeks of Halloween picks.
(23:46):
Uh the return of Bronco Man. All Right, I like
that sure. Hope by the time you dropped this on
a Sunday that Mr Unlimited and the Broncos will have
taken care of the Colts on Thursday night. Injuries have
hit my squad early and off in this season. Well,
also self inflicted wounds. Adrian. You know it's a bad
(24:08):
sign when your squad can't even get a playoff without
a pre snap penalty. That's that's like a Pop Warner
type penalty, and I've seen that happen a lot for
the Broncos this year. He says, I'm looking forward to
Tuesday night, the eleventh, when the Dodgers host Game one
of the NLDS. You know, I got some good coin
on l A winning it all. I'll be bleeding Dodger
(24:31):
blue this postseason. And he says, lastly, I'm a hat guy,
uh like you, the mad Hatter of sports chatter. He says,
check out this Dodger had I got for the platform's
and you can't see this to anybody's got a Dodger
hat and it's it's got like the Dodger logo with
a little green in got a little little green in that.
(24:51):
And Adrian is always so cool. He since got a
beautiful family, and he sent a bunch of of photos
year of his kids. And your wife, says a cardinal fan, Adrian,
what's up with that man? She from Saint Louis. She's
wearing a Saint Louis hat. What's up with that? Damn
(25:12):
red Birds they used to be she's on the juice.
I used to call them the cheating Cardinals, but then
the astros said, hold my beer and uh, and I
even forgot about that whole thing with the Cardinals back
in Dabby, there's some cool photos of corus Field. You've
been there right many times, Danny, And yeah, I've been
there a few times. Yeah, there you go. It's uh,
(25:34):
his lovely bride. Adrian's got his kids, and now I
hope you let your daughter eat the fuci. She had
a lot of mustards that your hot dog or her
mustard or her hotducts covered in mustard. And then your kid,
who's a dead ringer, Like a dead ringer for Adrian.
He's got the the pizza at the at the Rockies game.
And I do like that hat to Adrian's wearing. You
(25:55):
can't see this on the podcast, but he's wearing that
old school I like that old Bronco logo with the
white horse coming out of the d there. I like that.
It's a solid one of those undeniable children where you
could never be like, oh, it's not my baby. Yeah,
you can't say that's the mailman of the pool guy
or the mechanic, that's that's your DNA pal, that's it. Yeah, yeah,
(26:19):
you can't get around that man. She could deny it's
her kid, but you can't deny that your kid. Okay,
it's a it's a it's a weird situation there, all right,
Next up here we go, let's keep the training moving. Mail.
Next up is pat in Madina, Ohio and not Madinada.
(26:41):
Everyone gets it wrong. No worry, he's been, he says,
been in Danny g. Since it is the spooky season,
I have some questions about your horror movie favorites. Do
you guys have a favorite horror movie? If I may
be so bold as to ask for a second one,
I always loved going to haunted houses, as a kid
(27:02):
growing up in Ohio, did you or Danny ever go
to a haunted house scary hay rides as a kid, Yes,
although I was always freaked out by the the haunted houses,
but usually these were like Halloween carnivals that they had. Um,
So I recall that, and I'm not a big horror
movie guy. That's just not my genre of movies. So
(27:24):
I recall back in the day when I was younger,
was like Friday with the Big One. I remember, remember that.
Does The Gremlins count as a horror movie? Probably not?
Probably not, But I mean it is kind of like
the attack, you know, don't give them water after midnight whatever,
don't feed him. Uh well, any favorite horror movie, Danny
(27:47):
g that comes to mind? You know, as far as
like slasher movies, I I've never liked those, even when
I was younger, I didn't care for those. But psychological
thrillers I really like. Um there's a movie that's out
right now called The Barbarian and that's a psychological thriller
that was good. I like that. But yeah, but he's saying,
(28:09):
maybe your favorite like growing up as a kid or
going to a haunted house. No, I didn't get to
do that. My mom is so Christian. She did not
partake in Halloween. She thought it was evil. So is
that right? Yeah, she's not alone. There's quite a few
people that that think that way about Halloween. To each
their own. Um, she's just like anything that kind of
(28:31):
is for the devil or where the devil's glorified. I'm
not into that. So horror movies were not really a
thing in our house. She didn't let us watch any
of those, even classics like The Shining. I had to
wait until I was an adult to see that. Yeah,
I've seen some of the classic horror movies, but I'm
not like I don't go out of my way to
(28:52):
to watch them. But thank you, pat In Mdina not
Mdina Madina understand Big Blue from the LBC is Yes,
he says a k the black man hockey fan racist. Well,
(29:14):
he ain't kidding. He loves hockey, even goes and watches
Eddie play adult hockey. That's a dedication. Stop Eddie, I says, question.
What would you do if a previous girlfriend Conquest showed
up at a Mallard meet and greet with a fan
listener of the show, Well, that would be very awkward,
(29:35):
big blue, very very awkward. Uh, I don't I don't
know what I would do, and I would like to
not be in that situation to find out. It would
be uncomfortable. I try to try to brush it off
like I don't really you know, just we're just friends
something like that. Right then, he wouldn't that be the
move to play it off like that? Yeah, the first
thing you need to do is go in for a
(29:56):
really tight hug, grab some math, and then just act
normal after that. That way you break the ice. Yeah,
just break the ice that way. That would be weird.
I did have a someone I didd years ago who
actually lives in Denver, in the Denver area, and she
she messaged me out of the blue saying, hey, I
(30:19):
she's still single. She was on a date and they
were talking about what they were into, and the the
guy said he was a fan of mine, and that
kind of upset her a little bit. I think I
was triggered. Yeah, so she contacted me and I can't
get rid of this guy. Yeah, she thought that was interesting,
haunting me. Uh. I would back in your DJ days, Danny,
(30:44):
any odd things pop up there when you were doing
an appearance and somebody might have shown up that you
might or might not have had some quality time with
in the past. There. I mean, I think too. When
I was programming the hip hop radio station in Ventura,
Santa Barbara, I was on this date and it was
a really pretty blonde girl from Santa Barbara, from their
(31:05):
Christian college there in Santa Barbara. And she loved house
music and dance music. Cool girl, and it was like
a second date with her. I didn't have her come
into the studio, but I needed to stop by to
print out a music log for the guy that was
going to do the evening show so I could go
have dinner with her. So I run inside, print this
(31:25):
music log out, run it into the studio, and as
I walk out the studio doors, my ex is sitting
there in her saturn. She had a red saturn and
she was just hovering outside of the studio doors stoker.
I walk. I try to pretend like I don't see her.
I walked to my car where the date is sitting
(31:48):
in the passenger seat of my car with her window down,
and she looks at me. Hi, it was excited that
I'm back out for the date, and dun, dun, dun dun,
dun dune. The Saturn pulls up to my car are
and she says, aren't you gonna come kiss me? Man? Whoa?
(32:08):
Aren't you gonna even say hi? You're not gonna give
me a kiss. She's saying it loud enough so that
the girl in my car can hear her pulled up
behind my car so that I couldn't get out. It
was a mess. And so then you're forced to explain
this to the new person you're trying to date, so
that that was a fun dinner unless it wasn't. I
bet what a what a pain? And that took is
(32:30):
that is man? I would do a couple more. Blind Scott,
he randomly sent this in It's not really a question,
he says. It's a local story in Boston. He says,
a guy jumped into the Charles River to retrieve his
lost phone. Unfortunately, he did not find his phone. He
found eleven other phones, but not his. Ah is that
(32:52):
this is a news story. That's crazy. That is wow.
And I walked around the Charles River a bunch and
and it's people are running that one thing about Boston.
People are outdoors a lot, not not you know, not
in the winter, obviously, but but in the summer and
the spring and the fall, they're running around and bikes
and all that stuff. And how do your how does
your phone end up in the Charles River? Though I
(33:15):
don't I don't get it all right now, But that's wild.
Eleven Phones, You're a Cool show would be an investigative
show that tells the story of all eleven phones and
how they got there. It sounds like a podcast or
something like that. It sounds like a promo for an
I Heeart podcast exactly three part series as only on
(33:35):
iHeart podcast Network. All right, next time, I Got mail? Yea?
I got mail, yea. Kevin in Kansas right soon, says
near Ben and Danny g. It's obvious that both you
are hard workers. How far back does your work history go?
I loaded play pigeons at a trap club, worked at
a McDonald's, wrote sports for the local paper, and have
(33:59):
my own mowing business, among other jobs in my lifetime.
What jobs did you have in addition to being radio guys?
That's from Kevin in Kansas. Well, Kevin, I, I've been
in radio for a long time. Me and Danny both
started young ages. I started I was nineteen Danny was
younger than I was when he started in radio. Before that,
though I mentioned, I was a newspaper delivery kid when
(34:21):
I was growing up. Most of my work experience was
actually with my parents. My mom ran a mailing service.
She did like mail for realtors and things like that,
when they'd send flyers out back in the days before
the Internet, they'd send flyers out for open houses and
things like that, and we did a lot of that.
It was you know, junk mail, bulk mail, and so
(34:42):
my mom helped had me help her with the business
when I was a kid, and I put a lot
of like stickers on different labels, address labels and whatnot.
Thousands thousands of these things we'd send out. So I
did a lot of that as a kid, and I
worked at the the I did a website, Ben mallary
dot com I had for a long time, and I've
(35:03):
done a few other Internet writing things, but most of
my work is in radio. What about you, Dan? By
the way, what did the homepage of your website look like?
Ben mallard dot com. My my website, I was all
it was. I was aggregating, you know, it looks like
did they have a picture of you though, No, no, no, no,
not really. It was just my name at the top.
(35:24):
And then it was just a bunch of a bunch
of random stories that I would aggregate every day and
nobody else was really doing at the time, and so
I had my own corner of the Internet. There was
no like cool jail shot of you bending down with
your arms crossed. I can, I know, Well, it depends
on a few in a different dimension. Nanny, there were
(35:48):
there was that, and yeah all that stuffact Hollywood head
shot of you on the front page. Oh yeah, No,
I don't think I had any models wearing T shirts
with my name them. I think I had what happened
to that guy? By the way, Oh I know, I know,
you know, much like you. I got my start with
(36:08):
newspaper delivery um from my cousin. I learned how to
throw a paper out, and then my mom moved us
to the central valley where houses were more affordable. So
I was throwing a morning newspaper for the big city,
and then the smaller newspaper was delivered in the afternoon,
so I could do both. I through the morning paper
(36:31):
and the afternoon paper. I gave my mom half of
the money I earned, and then I took the other
half and I bought c d s so that I
could go into the high school radio station in DJ.
So I had to hustle, hustle hard um, you know,
because you had to provide your own music. So then
I moved on to the college radio station, and I
logged my crates and bags of c d s to
(36:54):
the college radio station every Friday night, Come on, pipping off.
We didn't have called R and B band. We called
it the best in soul in hip hop for the nineties.
There you go, How does it make you feel, Danny,
that the oldiest stations are now playing stuff from like
the early nineties and stuff I called it. I knew it.
I knew it was gonna happen because when even when
(37:16):
people were saying, oh, it's a fad, it's a fad,
even at that time, it had been around for twenty
years and some people were still calling it a fad.
And I was like, no, this music is amazing and
it's gonna last forever. I'm gonna be a grandfather on
some classic hip hop station. And I remember people laughing
when I would say that there was gonna be classic
(37:37):
hip hop stations, and now that's a genre, that's an
actual radio format. Now, oh, absolutely absolutely, we do one more.
We gotta get out of here, one more here John
in Northern Colorado. John is a longtime fan of the show.
He says, Ben in, Danny, g do you prefer your
eggs fried, scrambled, or boiled? Well, this is an easy one.
(37:58):
I'm not a big egg guy, but it's gotta be
scrambled or I ain't eating it scrambled all the way.
I'm not doing the boiled. I'm not doing the fried.
I'm doing scrambled. What about you, Danny. I'm gonna have
scrambled eggs as soon as we get done with our podcast,
right now, Ben, One cool thing about my girl. She's
not a huge fan of milk products or milk because
(38:20):
you call it, but she does love scrambled eggs, and
she makes really, really good scrambled eggs. Sometimes throws a
little bit of melted cheese in there, puts the perfect
amount of salt and pepper. Whenever she serves up scrambled
eggs and English muffins, I run as fast as you
can imagine to the table. I right. Well, when I
(38:47):
was a kid, I used to eat breakfast, and my
mom would make omelets with cheese omelets, and I did.
I did like that. I did enjoy that. That was
that was a nice treat back in the Oh, that
sounds good. That sounds good. Yeah it was. It was
really good and really unhealthy for you. But what the hell?
Why not? They only live once? Might as well enjoy
the journey, you know, the destination. All right, we'll get
(39:09):
out of here on that. You know, we need your
big reveal. Oh that's right, that's right. The Halloween costume.
This is a podcast exclusive. Let me know when you're
ready for the two dollar drum roll. Alright, no one
else has this content. Hit the drum roll, Danny J.
Here we go, and I will be dressing up as
(39:33):
PBS celebrity Bob Ross. I will be dressed up as
Bob Ross. There are no mistakes, Danny, just happy little accidents. Wow,
it won't just be coop that I'm smoking within your backyard,
I'll be I'll be painting a mosaic, is what I
will be doing with those little trees and on the
(39:57):
hippie lettuce. At your party, I'll be hanging out. Ninet
seventies Style nineteen eighties, Bob Ross, smoke weed, the shirt,
the jeans, the whole thing. I got it all going on.
We'll get out of here. You're off today, Danny, Right,
you're done, my day off. Get to kick back, watch
some NFL and wait for my Raiders on Monday night.
(40:18):
All right, have a great rest of your day. I'll
be back on the radio tonight, the Magic Radio Box
as we will kick off the festivities at eleven pm
in the West on Sunday, two am in the East,
and we'll go all the way to six am in
the East and we'll talk all things ANDFL and the
baseball playoffs. What a wonderful time of the year it
(40:42):
is to do this and to be a sports fan.
We got a lot on our plate. We'll get to
it all and we look forward to that and we'll
catch you next time. We're out like a pig snout.
That's a new one.
Host
Ben Maller
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