March 31, 2023 • 51 mins
Ben Maller & Danny G. have another fun bonus broadcast! They're talking: Skipper Ripper (from Ben's Big Board), Safari Kingdom (with a new intro) & more!
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Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:01):
Boom. If you thought four hours a day, twelve hundred
minutes a week was enough, think again. He's the last
remnants of the old Republic, a sole fashion of fairness.
He treats crackheads in the ghetto gutter the same as
the rich pill poppers in the penthouse. Wow. It's a
clearinghouse of hot takes. Break free for something special. The
(00:22):
Fifth Hour with Ben Maller starts right now in the
air everywhere, back at it. A brand new weekend is
kicking off. It is the Fifth Hour with Ben Maller
and Danny g Radio. We thank you for subscribing downloading
(00:43):
the podcast Tell a Friend, Tell a Friend, available on
demand the iHeartRadio app worldwide. Wherever you get your podcast,
you can listen to the show. And Danny, we are
now into a brand new month. It's April fools Day,
perfect day today. We're not to April yet. We're very
(01:04):
close to it, though, no, because I on one side
in the studio, I have the radio equipment and then
I have the podcast stuff over here, but they're both
microphones and I just start yapping and anyway, all right, well, well, nonetheless,
even though it is not April first, that was my
early April Fool Show. I, of course, Danny, as you know,
(01:27):
never make a mistake. Everything is done intentionally wrong. Professional
broadcasting at its finest. That's how we roll. So we
have the Skipper Ripper on today's podcast, Safari Kingdom with
a new added feature to Safari Kingdom. And if we
have time, pop no, no, no, no again. I want
(01:52):
the record to show. I want the record to show
there there is nothing this is. This has nothing to
do with Animal thundered, what is going on? Nothing at all.
This is something totally different and really an added featured,
a great bonus to the podcast, just amazing. So but
we'll start with it. So with Major League Baseball beginning.
(02:14):
It was opening day yesterday. They get that right, Danny, Thursday, Yeah, yes,
where are the applause at? Here we go? How about
home off? I'll be here for the whole hour, or
at least part of it. So baseball started. I love baseball.
I did a couple of rants on the Overnight Show.
We did a couple of monologues about baseball this week,
which I loved. I enjoyed that. It was fine, great, wonderful.
(02:36):
There is no better way, though, to celebrate baseball on
this podcast than with audio gold and if you know
what I mean, maybe not, you might not know where
I'm going with this, but if you've heard me yapping
and Danny you know about this. We worked together a
one time. I love the postgame tirade. I love mascots
(02:57):
and postgame tirades there my favorite. So I would like you,
the consumer of this audio content, to settle in to
the spit and Sawdust pub inspired. This was actually inspired
by something that happened on the overnight show leading into
Opening Day because we were yapping. I was I was
(03:18):
giving some thoughts on what I thought was going to
happen in the baseball season, and if he didn't hear that,
Roberto randomly played one of the great postgame rants from
Tommy Lasorda, and then that got me going. We played
a couple other things and that I had this come
to Jesus moment. I said, wait a minute, like, we
(03:39):
don't have the time. On the radio show, we don't
have the time to play all the rants, but on
the podcast we can't. Now the other thing, Danny is
you know that I do not do list radio because
that would be wrong. Never never you like to put
your lists on top up of Mount Rushmore. I don't
(04:04):
believe in that it's lazy. I don't float on the
lazy river. I believe in preparing and showing up and
putting an honest effort in because you, you, the listener,
spend time and I want to put my work in.
So we will not be doing a list, unfortunately you
call yours Mount Rushmore instead. Oh no, no, we will
not be doing a Mount Rushmore. Instead, we will have
(04:26):
Benny's Big Board, which is not a list. It's it's
something totally different's completely kosher. The Malla Militia love Benny's
Big Board. The Malla Militia hate list radio. They don't
like Mount Rushmore, but they love Benny's Big Board. What
it's an ET sketch. It's it's it's amazing. I'll tell
you what it is. I have somewhere here. I have
(04:50):
this right it's that right right there. Okay. It's like
a little dryer race board that probably usually says go
pick up food. Yeah yeah, something like that. Yeah yeah.
So this is going to be the quintessential big board
starting out twenty twenty three, the greatest manager meltdowns in
(05:17):
recorded audio history. In my opinion. In my opinion, these
are my hot takes. These are not your hot takes.
And you can add to this, Danny, as you're appreciative
of the rant by managers as well. So settle back,
get a big bucket of popcorn or whatever you're doing,
and this is going to be out of this world content.
(05:39):
It is going to be a toe tapping good time.
So we start out on Benny's big board. We have
a six pack. A six pack, and there were so
many that did not make the cut, that ended up
on the cutting room floor, but number six, number six.
We start out in Chicago with the White Sox. Let's
(06:04):
go back in the hot tub time machine. We're gonna
set the year to twenty h eight. The Chicago White
Sox are managed by a fiery guy by the name
of Ozzie Gien. He had played shortstop in Chicago Mike
North's best friend. Hey told Stowall, yes, Ozzie believed that
(06:24):
he was better than all of the media and loved
to love to screw around with the baseball media and
Mike North as well. So this is one of many
rants that we could have used. I would have put
this higher. Unfortunately, Ozzy Ozzie was ranting and raving. Some
of it is hard to understand. Some of it is
(06:45):
not the easiest to understand, but listening closely, this is
Ozzie Yan. The White Sox were on a six game
losing streak. Ozzie was very upset with the way the
media was handling things and the way that the fans
of Chicago we're handling the White Sox or play. So
let's go to the audio tape. Here's Ozzy Gian pregame,
(07:09):
ranting about the media and the fans. Oh right now, everybody, no,
but everybody in Chicago. It's try making line nose and
called these guy and called that guy. I mean, we
got fifty people in rothterday and we can do that.
I mean that what teach me? If something about Chicago
fans and Chicago media diff I got pretty quick a
(07:31):
couple of days ago. We wasn't invading the town. Now
with that's that's that's I don't get it, because maybe
the minch they can be that way, you know what
I mean, But God, le Jesus, what will it take
for people real races? Two thousand and seven out of
(07:52):
the months winning winning, We went a couple of years
ago and we old because we've been home twenty years.
They have the best. Okay, we're good everybody. We hold
you to be all the life, no matter how many
worsher we win, we hold we have of Chicago. Chicago,
(08:18):
we got the worser owner. The guy got set rings
and we are holding the owner. I mean no, he's
kind of got a guy or something. Talk about it
for years that you know, it's the way it is.
It's not the bodies, that what it is. He's like
(08:39):
you playing New York or you play team with two
you know, city with two couple of teams. But wow,
you know what I mean, I don't know what we
should do to make people believe or big excited about it. Yeah,
you know what I mean. You've been a couple of
years around and you know what I mean. Well, I
don't know what the say. You know in two thousand
(09:00):
and say we got a good year two thousand and
said we got it really really by year and were
never denyed it. We never did. We never did we
celebrate how about the cup celebrating boot? How many times
curse people? Now? I know, I know I don't have
any I will make a lot of money with my sho.
That's why I gotta keep going because I know in
the future, as it would the morning's head here just
(09:22):
ten years anniversary of my I will call marioity stuff
and I called what the guys and the things when
the radio I coached him out last year, Oh my core. Yeah,
you know, we gotta sell too, you know what I mean?
What sucks. I'm not gonna be up for ten years Bolivia,
my ships. My conflict is going on. Huh. A lot
(09:43):
of people to take you. I don't know about that.
I don't know about that, but you know what I mean,
Hey man, I don't know when people was finding him.
You know we played the real back we yes, we did.
We stalk for for a week. Yeah, I mean better
you know, I I mean, don't too far. Well, I'll go.
We know it was a surprisal baseball the best thing.
How don't they go, Wow, look at the white Now
(10:04):
this on all right there, we go back to back
to normal. We gotta deal with there's nothing we can
do about it. The lumber twenty five guys, I believe
we can do. That's all I care. Everything out He's like, hey,
that was that was enjoyable and there's a theme to
this list. There's a lot of a lot of Chicago.
There's a lot of Chicago on this. Ozzy, his most
(10:29):
famous rant was to a magazine when he got hired
as the Marlins manager and proceeded to endorse Fidel Castro,
and that went over very well. We don't have audio
because there's no audios I know that exists. That by
Ozzy again. Moving on at number five on Big Ben's
Big Board, we go to the heartland of Cansas City,
(10:52):
and this is a classic. I believe this is our
only rant from the nineteen nineties that made Big Ben's
Big Board of manager melt sounds. But number five is
how McCray Now, I'm gonna paint the picture Danny. This
happened in nineteen ninety three. How McCray is in the
(11:13):
manager's office. There are the Royals, I believe are on
the road. He's wearing long John pajamas like like you know,
like he's ready if you go to bed, and he
starts getting more and more worked up with the way
the questions are coming from the Royals beat writers. It
ends up with him throwing a phone. Now what you
(11:35):
can't see on this and this is the part we
have to describe for our blind listeners, especially blind Emmett
the Seahawk fan and blind Scott. So during this rant,
all of the reporters that are in the Royals manager's office,
how McCray, they all leave the office. So what does
(11:55):
how McCray do. He follows them out into the hallway
because he's not done with his rant, and he said
he was sick and tired of the stupid questions. Let's
go to the audio tape how McCray with a masterpiece
where all I had to go after him? Was all
right and I left. So we're swinging a bat bats well,
(12:18):
so I wanted my left hand hitter as a hit.
Did you consider Brett for Miller with a basis Leader
of the Seven? No? No No, I don't ask him all
these stupid ass questions. No, and in the all God
ask questions night hit dreadful. No, Miller, Simon, he's banning stuff.
(12:45):
It just Brant not banging and stuff and it just
funing back back. No, you're thinking my damn food. Yeah,
his thumbs stupid, Absolutely, that stupid ass. Sh I'm not
(13:13):
taking you, guys, I'm not taking no sho players. I'm
sacking time. I'm fan out with everything from you guys
players and they can do it in thing they want
to do. I'm sick and tired of all this bullshit.
Now put that in the fact of the reporters hit
(13:38):
with some of the shrapnel. Yes, yes, that's a great
point we should follow up as this is the quintessential
twenty twenty three manager meltdown rant Benny's Big Board. So
one of the writers was hit right above the eye,
and if I remember the story correctly, he actually had
a pretty serious inch three because when you say throw
(14:02):
a phone today people think of a cell phone. This
was one of those big old school landlines they still
used in the in the early nineteen nineties. So how
heavy they were, they were like little bricks, not even
that little. So how mccraig coming in at number five? Now,
(14:22):
number four is our first surprise on Big Ben's Big Board,
and we go to Seattle, the Seattle Mariners getting a
little love on this, and we welcome in John McLaren,
John McLear, do you even know about this? Rand? I
think you know about this, right? We played this when
(14:43):
you were there, right, yeah, yeah, I've played this on
your live show. Yeah, So I consider this the Swiss
Army Knife of postgame rants, not just in baseball but
in any sport. To set this up, John McClaren was
very unhappy at this. This goes back. I want to
say this happened in the early twenty tens, like twenty eleven,
(15:07):
twenty twelve. I'm not one hundred percent sure on that.
We'd have to go back in double check. But nonetheless,
it doesn't matter when it happy. It's been over ten years.
So John McLaren was unhappy that the team was not
playing well in Seattle. The media was down on the Mariners.
They were disparaging the team the Ohays even before. Okay,
(15:28):
so it's been fifteen years. I didn't realize it's been
that long. So this happened and Ozzie Gain both happened
in oh eight. Who knew so, John John McLaren, the manager,
was upset and he was trying to defend his team.
He gave one of the greatest raw Roz speeches of
all time. Take a listen to the passion from John McLaren.
(15:53):
We're playing all right every day and got nothing to
show for it. I'm tired of losing. I'm trying to
get my beating. So guys, we're got to change this
around and get after it. And only we can do it.
The fans are pissed off, and I'm pissed off, and
the players are pissed off. And that's the way it is.
There's no easy way out here, is clam Field, sorry
(16:15):
for ourselfs got to buckle it up and get after it.
Tr Damn losing his every night, and we bust her.
It's gotta be a toe team effort turn this thing around.
And that's it. The thing about that, Danny hearing it again.
The reason it's the Swiss army knife is because McLaren
(16:37):
does not reference the Mariners. He doesn't reference Seattle. He
doesn't reference any of his players or any coaches, any
of the other players, any of the other coaches. He
doesn't name anything. It is so generic. He doesn't mention baseball.
We have used this as a Swiss army knife anytime
(16:59):
a team is struggling, like I really want I think that, like,
let's just pick a team like the Patriots are struggling.
Bill Belichick really let into his team. Here's the sound
of Bill Belichick complaining about his team. And then and
there you go. It works for everything. It's a Swiss
Army knife of rants. So congratulations to John McLaren and
the Mariners your job. Coming in at number four, number
(17:22):
three a bit of a surprise. A lot of people
thought this would be higher, this guy would be higher.
Tommy Lasorda, you got a couple of the best rants
in the history of Rance. Yeah, Tommy is great. It's
and I knew Tommy a little bit passed away a
(17:44):
while back, not that long actually, but he actually makes
there's a double dose of Lasordi here. There's two of these.
And the only reason that Tommy's not number one or
number two is because it's like top forty radio. Danny.
I've heard these so many times over the years. I'm
(18:05):
a little I'm a little burned out on him, you
know what I mean. It's like hearing the song featuring Acon.
It's just they're burned into my head. So the most
famous Lessorda rant, which is his gold standard, his masterpiece,
was about Dave Kingman's performance. This comes from nineteen seventy eight.
(18:26):
Was May fourteenth, nineteen seventy eight, Dodgers laying the mets
at Dodger Stadium and Dave Kingman it now one, not two,
but three, three home runs, and that led to Paul
Olden asking the most famous question ever asked to Tommy Lasorda,
(18:50):
can you give us just a few basic comments about
the their pianos on the game. Well, naturally, I feel
bad about losing a ballgame like that. There's no way
you should lose that ball game, and that just doesn't
make sense. It's your opinion of King's performance? What's my
opinion of King's performance? What you think? It's my opinion
(19:13):
of it? I think it was put that in. I
don't opinion of his performance. He beat us with three
home runs? What if you mean what is my opinion
of his performance? How could you ask me a question
like that? What is my opinion of his of his performance?
He hit three home runs? I'm stoff to lose the
(19:37):
game and you ask me my opinion of his performance.
I mean that's a tough question to ask me, isn't it.
What is my opinion of his performance? Yes, it is?
I ask it and you gave me an answer. Well,
I didn't give you a good answer because I'm mad,
But I mean it wasn't a good question. It's a
tough question. To ask me right now, what is my
(19:59):
opinion of it performance? I mean, you want me to
tell you what my opinion of his performance Isn't they did?
That's right. Guy hits three home runs against us. That
is Oh, that's a fucking good time right there. It is.
(20:20):
And Danny, I'm happy to report that I have met
the great Paul Olden. He's an LA radio legend and
he has been the public address announcer. The man that
asked that question has been the public address announcer for
the New York Yankees for many years now. He was
the Super Bowl public address announcer. He's done play by
(20:42):
play for multiple Major league teams over the years. Paul
Olden is his name. We have a mutual friend, the
great Ted Sobel, who used to work at Fox Sports
Radio's friends with Paul. Yeah, I know t yeah, So
they worked together. So I have met Paul Olden and
he's he went off and had an amazing career which
(21:03):
is continuing to this day. As his sole job, he
gets paid a great amount of money to be the
public address announcer the Yankees. He goes to Florida for
a month, does spring training, and then he does the
six months during the baseball season, but only when the
Yankees are at home. And that's it. That's his gig,
that's all he does. How great is that? What a life? Yeah,
(21:25):
So that's not the main less sort of rant that
I love. My favorite is this next rant that we're
going to play on Benny's big board. Tommy Lessorta coming
in at number three, and that is all about Kurt
Bavakua of the Padres. So the Kingman rant was from
nineteen seventy eight. This one's from July nineteen eighty two,
(21:48):
and the Dodgers had a picture named Tom needonfuer piece
of crap. Yeah. He's most famous for serving up a
meatball to Jack Clark and Petro Guerrero slamming his glove
down on the outfield. Yeah yeah, in the nineteen eighty
five National League Championship Series. But this is nineteen eighty two,
and didn't need and fewer Mary like a Hollywood starlet
(22:11):
or showgirl or something like that, if I remember correct
anyway that matter, So I don't know. I hope she
abused him, though, So Needon Fuor was fine. This is hilarious.
Nineteen eighty two, he was fined five hundred dollars for
beating a San Diego player named Jim LaFeber, who would
go on and manage in the Big League. So this
is just a random game. Needon Fuor gets fined. The
(22:33):
next day, his teammate Kurt Bovacua of the Padres was
quoted in the newspapers as saying the guy they should
have fined was the guy who ordered Needon Fuor to
throw at Joe, that fat little Italian. That was the
quest that made the newspaper dann oh man, imagine if
(22:55):
that happened today, Holy racist racist right right, you can't
do that and fattest, But Bavakwa did it. And then
what do you think happened? The next day the reporter's
pregame asked Tommy Losorda. They said, hey, Tommy Bakwa called
you a fat little Italian? What do you think about that?
(23:17):
And Tommy Lasorda went full Hindenburg on Kurt Buffakwa in
the Padres And to me, this is the greatest Losorda
rant of them all, and here it is. Tell you
what I think about it. I think that is very,
very bad for that man to make an accusation like that,
(23:39):
that is terrible. I have never, ever since I've managed,
ever told a picture to throw it anybody, nor will
I ever, and if I ever did, I certainly wouldn't
make him throw at a fucking one hundred and thirty
hitter black Lafae or fucking Bavakua, who could hit water
(24:03):
if he fell out of a fucking boat. And I
guarant fucking te you this. When I pitched and I
was going to pitch against a fucking team that had
guys on it like Bavakwa, I sent a fucking limousine
to get the cocksucker to make sure he was in
the motherfucking lineup, because I kicked that cocksucker's at any
fucking day in a week. He's a fucking motherfucking big mouth.
(24:25):
I'll say it. At Laudre's organization to this day has
never recovered that line Bavakua couldn't hit water if he
fell out of a fucking boat is one of the
all time great lines that Lasorda has used, and he
used the classic I'd send a limo to the you know,
(24:45):
to pick that guy up, and oh it's hilarious, and
I would like to pass on. I've mentioned this in
the past, but the late great Joe McDonald who was
an LA radio legend, and it was a friend of mine,
and Joel was inside all the Dodger Locker Roman events
from the seventies through the eighties and the nineties, and
he saw and did it all in that era when
Losorda was there. And he told me, and several others
(25:09):
have confirmed it that the greatest rants by the Sorta,
most of his great rants were not even recorded by microphones.
That's how prolific Losorda was because after the Kingman and
the Bavocua, he would check to make sure people did
not have a radio microphone. He would do it for
(25:30):
the writers sometimes, but when the radio guys were around,
he would he would slow his role. So it had
to be one of those little handheld recorders, right, yeah, yeah,
one of those little tape recorders, the cassette tape thing.
So moving on Benny's big board. This is honoring baseball's
opening day. You have tuned into the quintessential, the quintessential
(25:52):
big board greatest manager meltdowns. In my opinion, this is
my list, It's not yours. This has been a great
mount rushmore so far. No, no, no, no, no Mault Rushmore. No, No,
we don't believe in that. That's lazy podcasting. So number two,
we had an amazing, amazing library of audio clips from
this guy to choose from. He is the former manager
(26:15):
and I believe he's in the Hall of Fame. Earl Weaver.
Earl Weaver coming in at number two, A couple of classics.
We had many to choose from. Like I said, the
first one that made the cut Earl Weaver. This goes back.
I believe it was the late seventies, early eighties, and
on only exact date on this one either, but Earl
(26:37):
Weaver got into it during an Orioles Tigers game with
Bill Haller. Was the name h A. L. L Er,
not Maller Haller, Bill Hawler. And at the beginning of
this clip, you'll hear Eddie Murray at the start, and
then Earl Weaver enters. He comes running in. He's a
(27:00):
very small man, Earl Weaver, he's an old man at
this point. He runs over and he wants Bill Howard
Howler to know how he feels. And let's just say
Earl does not does not pull punches that. Let's go
to the audio tape. There's not a behind the rubber,
behind the rubber, he's not the golf behind. He didn't
(27:23):
go rub for you looking at him. He didn't know English.
That's behind the rubbers. Cruise, you're just the fuck us.
That's great, Yo, out run yourself, earl. You run yourself girl?
(27:49):
You mean yeah, I'm glad that Jap fuck up. You're
bushes and years. He don't you ever put your finger
on me? And you hit me? Girl? You don't put
your finger talking. Hi, get right, Yo, ain't gonna knock
(28:13):
nobody on her lass. You're doing again and I'm not.
You're right, And you know I didn't touch you. You
did not. No, you're lying, damn hiring. No, you who
aren't liar? I'm like liar. You're are a liar. You
are liar. You are tell you no, you have for
(28:37):
one reason to fuck istub wrong. That's the only race
in your own girl, and you'll have your chance tomorrow.
Quick's wrong with you? You ain't no good? No, you
aren't either. You're no good. You're no fucking good. Here. No,
I shall never have our game. So I hope you.
I want to run here? What do I What are
you doing here? Now? Well? Why don't you call the
(28:59):
the Govins and ask me I will oh good, don't
think I won't good day, And the quicker you get
on it'll be better too. Oh yeah, that's right. You
ain't going nowhere. You aren't either. I ten fucking years
to now. Who's in the Hall of Fame? Well, you're
(29:20):
gonna be in the whole no it right? You will
know a Brochers, you know it. You're gonna be in
the Hall of fay one more than I've lost you.
I know you're having a game. You better get gone,
and I'm i gotta get horribly better get gone. What
the hell you that you had your hands on it?
(29:52):
Now that's wrong? Long now, this one, Danny my favorite line.
When Earl comes out. The first thing he says to
the umpire, that guy Bill Holler is you are here
to fuck us? That is hilarious. And then at the
(30:13):
end of it you've heard Danny the umpire he responds
to one of the lines that Weaver says. The umpire
shoots back. He says, yeah, You're gonna be in the
Hall of Fame for fucking up the world series is
what he tells Earl Weaver on the field. It was
it was outstanding, just just wonderful, and I love it,
(30:36):
loved it, loved it, loved it all right, moving on that,
staying with Earl Weaver, and this is the main reason
Earl Weaver is at number two, not Tommy Lasorda. It's
the Manager's Corner pregame show for the Orioles Radio Network,
and Earl Weaver sat down with the one of the
oil broadcasters and delivered one of the funniest couple of
(31:01):
minutes you will ever hear from a baseball manager. And
let's go to the audio tape and now to the
Manager's Corner with Earl Weaver. Hi, everybody, this is Earl
Weaver with Manager's Corner. Today. I have Tom Moore, orio broadcaster,
back on the show. And I understand Tom's been getting
(31:21):
some mail with questions that supposedly I can answer. Now,
what the fuck are somebody's goddamn questions? Tom? Well, First
of all, Earl George Moore from Baltimore, I was asking
how much we feel the loss of Don Stanhouse. Well,
Don Stanhouse was an asshole. He had us in trouble,
had to fucking bases loaded, God damn it. Almost every
fucking time he went out there. He liked to ruin
(31:43):
my health smoking cigarettes. And thank god we got Timmy
Stoddard coming in out to bullpen right now sticking a
bat up their asses. And that's what it takes. Well,
Bill Whitehouse, Earl, that certainly is an answer from Frederick
Maryland wants to know why you and the Orioles don't
go out and get some more teams speed speed. For
Christ's sake, you get fucking goddamn little fleas on a
fucking basis, getting picked off, trying to steal, getting thrown out,
(32:07):
taking runs away from you. You get them big cocksuckers
that can hit the fucking ball out the ballpark, and
you can't make any goddamn mistakes. Well, certainly this show
is going to get out in history. Earl. Terry Elliott
of Washington, DC, Why wants to know why you don't
use Terry Crowley as a designated hitter all the time. Well,
Terry Crowley's lucky's in fucking baseball. For Christ's sake. He
was released by the Cincinnata Reds. He was released by
(32:29):
the fucking goddamn Atlanta Braves. We saw that Terry Crowley
could sit on his fucking ask for eight internes and
enjoy watching a baseball game just like any other fan,
and has the ability to get up there and break
one open in the fucking ninth. So if this cocksicker'd
mind his own business and let me manage the fucking team,
we'd be a lot better off. Well, certainly you've made
your opinions known on the fans questions about baseball, Earl,
(32:50):
but let's get to something else. Alice Sweet from Norfolk
wants to know the best time to put in the
tobata plan. Ellice sweethought to be worried about where the
fuck her next lay is coming from more rather than
were next goddamn tomato plants coming from. She get her
ass out to fucking bars at night and go hustling
around to goddamn street. She might get a prick stuck
in her once in a while. I don't understand where
(33:10):
these questions are coming from. Tom That's about it for
Manager's Corner. Go fuck yourself and the fuck with your
show coming up next on the Baltimore Oriole Baseball fucking Network.
Double Manager's Corner with Earl Weaver has heard twenty minutes
before every Orioles regular season game. Man I guess we
(33:32):
should point out, Danny, this did not actually air. That
never actually aired on the Baltimore Orioles Baseball fucking network.
It why, I don't know why. I don't know why.
He had a couple of brilliant lines. This was as
good as some of the all time great comedy rants
you think of historically, Abbott and Costello, things like that.
(33:55):
But Earl Weaver when he said Don Standhouse was an
asshole one of his former players, he said, Terry Crowley
is lucky he's in baseball. He can sit his fucking
ass for eight innings just like any other fan. And
then the end of that, Danny when he's talking about
the tomato plants, Oh my god, is that hilarious alice
(34:17):
sweet from Norfolk and the tomato plant. That's a ten.
That's a ten. That's a ten. When did Weaver pass away?
He actually died on a Baltimore Oriole fan cruise. You
know how they have those fan cruises in the office. Yeah,
he passed away on a cruise ship. Oh damn. Yeah,
(34:39):
if I remember correctly, I believe that. What a way
to go. Yeah, you're right at the Caribbean Sea. It
says twenty thirteen. Yeah. Fortunately they did not dump him overboard.
They actually took him back for a proper, proper burial.
But Earl, what a fiery man. The number one, number one,
(35:01):
number one on big Ben's big board, not a list,
not a list, number one a big Ben's big board. Well,
this one is. This is Picasso, this is Rembrandt, this
is the greats, this is NISI. What's the guy's name,
I can't even think of the guy's name, Danny. What's
the guy's name? Beethoven? Beethoven, whatever hell did? This is great?
(35:26):
So Beethoven. So we go now back to Chicago. We
started Big Ben's Big board in Chicago. We go back
to Chicago. Lee Elia, Oh yeah, Lee Ilia is the
NaN's name. It is the secretariat of manager meltdowns. In
my life. No one will ever pass this by. Lee
(35:49):
Elia broke the cardinal rule of business. You never attacked
the customer. The customer is always right. This was we'recorded
by the late great Less Grobstein in Chicago. I was
lucky enough to meet Less Grobstein. Very happy about that.
And Less also passed away not that long ago. But
(36:11):
Less was the only radio man that had a microphone
in the room. This is April twenty ninth, nineteen eighty three.
The Cubs are out of the gates slow first nineteen games.
The Chicago Cubs were five and fourteen. The fans were
razing the players at Wrigley Field. The Cubs had just
(36:31):
lost a game to the Dodgers. They lost, the Dodgers
beat them on a wild pitch by Lee Smith, and
the Dodgers scored the winning run. And so, needless to say,
the Cubs were in a bad mood. And then after
the game, this is so long ago, the clubhouses for
the teams were out in the outfield, So the Cub
(36:51):
players had to walk out to left field because that's
where the clubhouse was, out in left field. And after
the game, fans were pouring beer and other food items
trash on Keith Morland, Larry Boa, and Ron Say. So
they were just throwing all this crap and beer on
(37:14):
these guys. And Lee Elia was furious. He found out
about it, and he was having none of it. And
that provided us with this audio poetry Number one, Lee Ilia,
I'll tell you one fucking thing. I hope we get
fucking hot shit just to suff it up them. Three
(37:35):
thousand fucking people to show up every fucking day, because
if they're the real Chicago fucking fans, they can kiss
my fucking hands right downtown and print it. They're really
really behind you around here. My fucking hands am I
(37:55):
supposed to do? Go out there and let my fucking
players get destroyed every day and be quiet about it.
For the fucking Nickeldine people to show up. The motherfuckers
don't even work. That's why they're out of the fucking game.
They're only go out and get a fucking job and
find out what it's like to go out there in
a fucking living. Eighty five percent of the fucking world
work it. The other fifteen come out here the fucking
(38:18):
playground for the cocksuckers. Rip them, mother fuckers, Rip them
tucked cocksuckers. Like the fucking players got guys bucks in
their fucking ads for the fucking people through and that's
the cup My fucking ads then guck about the great
fucking support that the players get around here. I haven't
(38:41):
seen it this fucking here. The name of the game
has hit the ball, catch the ball, and get the
fucking job done. Right now, we have more losses than
we have wins. The fucking changes that have happened in
a couple organizations are multifolds, all right. They don't show
because we're five and fourth teams, And unfortunately that's the
(39:03):
criteria of them. Some fifteen motherfucking percent to come out
to day baseball. The other eighty five percent are earning
a living. It'll take more than a five and thirteen
or five and fourteen to destroy the makeup of this club.
I'll guarantee you that there's some fucking pros out there
that want to fucking play this game. But you're sucking
(39:28):
a fucking sigma. The fucking Dodgers and the Phillies and
the Cardinals and all that cheap shit. All these mother
fucking editorials about say and fucking uh, the phillyitis and
all that should that did sickening. It's unbelievable, it really is.
It's a disheartening fucking situation. We're right now five and fourteen.
(39:51):
Doesn't the gate all that work one hundred and forty
three fucking games left. What I'm trying to say it,
don't rip them fucking guys out there ripped me? Can
I want to rip somebody? Rip my fucking head but
don't rip them fucking guys because they're kivin everything they
can get. But once we hit that fucking groove, it
(40:14):
will flow, and it will flow the talents there. I
don't know how to make it any clarity you. I'm frustrated.
I'll guarantee I'm frustrated. It'd be different if I walked
into this room every day at eight thirty and saw
a bunch of guys they didn't give a shit. They
give a shit, and it's a tough Natalie Gees. The
thing about this dandy which is wild to me is
(40:37):
Lee Elia was fired as Cub manager. This happened April
twenty ninth. You know when Lee lost his job. I'm
gonna take a guess a month later? No, how about August?
He through May, June, July, three more months, and then
in August of nineteen eighty three for reasons completely not
(41:00):
related to that clip, because it was never broadcast, at
least not the full rant, and he was let go
because the team was not playing well. The Cubs did
not play well, but Leela actually survived. What was his
math there? Oh, the eighty five percent of the world's
work and the other fifteen percent come out here. It's
a playground for the blank blanks. Take that for data.
(41:25):
You get a real job, God, and get a real
job and all that nonsense. Blank my blank and blank
you exactly exactly. So that is big bench, big board.
Thank you for putting up with that. And the bad
news is that kidding? That's gonna be the best thing
that I've heard all week? All right, No, it's it's
(41:45):
it's it's it's wonderful. So yeah, why why don't you
want to do the Safari Kingdom? You want to push
that to the the Saturday podcast. We do the Safari Kingdom?
You want? You want to do it? Yeah, we can
fit Safari Kingdom in here. All right, let's do it.
And it is now an official bit, Danny g. As
you know, our man Ohio Ow has come through. We've
(42:07):
got a very little jingle, a small jingle, the work
of Ohio Aw. And here it is. It's time for
Kingdom with dang radio alight and look at that. We
just got a cease and desist from Clay Travis. No,
(42:29):
this is not this is not animal underdome. There's no thunderdome.
This is something completely different. I'm sure that'll solve it.
This is Safari Kingdom. And these are a few animal stories.
Why not. People love animals, and these are animal related stories.
And sometimes they're bugs, sometimes they're animals. Everyone loves their dogs.
(42:51):
And Prada, the high falutin brand Prada, has decided that
they would like to take advantage of rich people that
have a lot of extra money, as they have debuted
a brand new dog code inspired by high fashion human designs,
and they are selling a dog coade for seven hundred
(43:15):
and ninety five dollars. Get the fuck out of here. Yeah,
anyone that buys that should be sentenced to some kind
of public service. Seven hundred ninety five dollars for a
fucking dog coat? Are you kidding me? Come on, Yeah,
that's how much the pure bread mutt cost. It costs
(43:37):
more than that. Now, man, some of these I know,
if you get a good deal on one without papers,
you know, somebody that's wild. How about this story out
of Missouri. A woman is being forced to pay peta
two hundred thousand dollars in legal fees. The People against
(43:58):
the Ethical Treatment of Animals, the people who you know,
don't want to seat meat Peter and so anyway, this
this woman two hundred thousand dollars in legal fees. Why
she faked a chimp's death and a cremation. Yeah, she's
(44:21):
ordered to pay two hundred thousand dollars in legal fees.
She faked the death of a movie star chimp that
had a role in a movie from the nineteen nineties.
Film it was called Buddy Goop was in that Yeah, exactly.
So a federal court ruled that this woman, Tanya, has
to give over two hundred, two hundred and twenty five
(44:42):
thousand dollars in legal fees to the animal rights group
because her tail and the chimpanzee that she was carrying
for Tonka had had died was cremated, and all that
the false death claim was relayed under oath. It resulted
in PETA needing to build for hundreds of attorney work
(45:05):
hours that they claim cost thousands of dollars, and so
Pee is like, you gotta pay us that money. And
it turns out that a judge in Saint Louis is like, yeah,
you gotta pay this money. The moral is, do not
do not fake a story and have Peter investigate, or
you're gonna be up shit creek and without without a paddle.
(45:29):
So that's that's unfortunate. It's unfortunate. Next up on the
Safari Kingdom. You see that story out of Colorado, a
mountain lion attacking a dude in a hot tub. Oh
I saw this. Yeah, that is that's gotta be everyone's nightmare.
Is there is there any way that that is not
everyone's nightmare to be in a hot tub at a
(45:50):
rental home. I guess you are relaxed when the accident happens. Yeah,
so this mountain lion clawed at this dude. He and
his wife were just kind of hanging out and having
a good time. They renting those place and lounging in
the in the hot tub and out in the woods.
(46:10):
And it's about eight o'clock. And this happened a couple
of weeks ago in Colorado. And the guys like, yeah,
I felt so, I felt something grab grabbed my head
and yeah, they must have really been in a tranquil state,
like with their eyes closed. Do you think the wife
(46:30):
was like, oh, honey, you're Viagaras kicking in. Slap me
around a little bit. Wow. And the way this ended
the story is like the wife Danny grabbed the flashlight
points it towards the mountain lion. Yeah, the husband and
the wife they start screaming at the mountain lion and
then eventually the mountain lions all right, fuck you, and
(46:52):
then then walks back into the into the woods. But
here's the problem, man, at some point, you gotta get
out of a hot tub, right, and don't you think
that mountain lion is still lurking off in the shadows
in the woods waiting to pounce on you. Man, talk
about being a sitting duck. Hello. The husband had four scratches,
(47:20):
but it was all superficial on the top of his
head and near his right eye. That could have taken
the dude's right eye out. Yeah. Man, and the officers
inspected the wounds, they said they didn't match a mountain lion. Well,
here's something from the insect world on Safari Kingdom. Because
insects are part of the Safari. Female spiders, according to
(47:43):
new research, played dead when they're having sex. Why do
they play dead, Danny, You want to take a guess
they're not into their husbands. No, female spiders played dead
during sex, so males don't have to worry about being eaten. Hello, Yeah,
(48:03):
I mean I've heard the stories about how they eat
there they're afterwards, right, yeah. Yeah. According to new research,
the female spiders played dead during sex, so the males
are a little less worried that they might be eaten
when the deed is done chans and that in turn
(48:24):
makes it easier for the females to choose the best
mates by playing dead for appealing to partners fighting off
the scrubs. So, I don't know. You think they've they've
gotten in the mind of spiders, You think so, I don't.
They claimed they've researched it. They claimed they've done their
(48:45):
homework and they've gotten to the bottom of it. This
is an interesting story out of Australia. That's hard. Have
you seen the photo of the World's Happiest cow Danny? No,
you have not. I gonsa send you this photo. If
you're listening to the podcast, just imagine what this looks like.
(49:07):
I'm gonna hold on, say, i gotta click a couple
of buttons here, and then I'm gonna send this to
you and and then Danny, you can describe exactly what's
in in the photo. But this has been bouncing around
social media for the last few days. It's it's in
the echo chamber. See that. Oh yeah, what is what
(49:31):
is that? Danny? Oh that's crazy looking, isn't that awesome?
On the side, it's white, racist all through the middle
of the cow. And on its side it's a happy face. Yeah,
it's the happiest cow around. Did dark markings look like
a smiley face? Yeah? So this happened earlier in the
(49:52):
month of March and freaky right. The the it's now
become the mascot of a dairy in Australia and they've
they've they're gonna use this for different events in promotions
and whatnot, and so that cow will live a wonderful
(50:13):
life and not have to worry about anything. Everything's taken
care of for that cow. It's the world's happiest cow.
And on the left side it's got a smiley face,
like a smiley emotion. So that's kind of cool. There
you go. Yeah, The owners decided to sell him after
being overwhelmed by media attention. Yeah, I think I think
(50:36):
we're you're gonna make some make some money on this,
why not? What the hell? All right, Well, that's it,
we'll get out on that. Anything you want to promote
Danny on Friday, which is not April first, It is not.
That was a false alarm. It is not April first. Yeah,
last day of March. You're done with your radio shift.
I still need to go into mine this afternoon. Produce
(50:57):
a fun Coveno and Rich Friday show for two to
four pm West Coast Time Outstanding. Enjoy that Cavino and Rich.
They actually have stuff they give away on that show,
unlike our show. We don't give any on my overnight show.
We don't have we don't have any budget. We give
nothing away. But I have a great head. You give
trips away, well, we do give that is correct. We
do give the trip round trip to nowhere, and we
(51:18):
have a lifetime supply nothing and nobody else is giving
those things away. So that is true. That is accurate.
And we have a great rest of your day, and
got a big podcast weekend all weekend long and we'll
catch you next time later. Skater gott a murder, Gotta
go
Boom. If you thought four hours a day, twelve hundred
minutes a week was enough, think again. He's the last
remnants of the old Republic, a sole fashion of fairness.
He treats crackheads in the ghetto gutter the same as
the rich pill poppers in the penthouse. Wow. It's a
clearinghouse of hot takes. Break free for something special. The
(00:22):
Fifth Hour with Ben Maller starts right now in the
air everywhere, back at it. A brand new weekend is
kicking off. It is the Fifth Hour with Ben Maller
and Danny g Radio. We thank you for subscribing downloading
(00:43):
the podcast Tell a Friend, Tell a Friend, available on
demand the iHeartRadio app worldwide. Wherever you get your podcast,
you can listen to the show. And Danny, we are
now into a brand new month. It's April fools Day,
perfect day today. We're not to April yet. We're very
(01:04):
close to it, though, no, because I on one side
in the studio, I have the radio equipment and then
I have the podcast stuff over here, but they're both
microphones and I just start yapping and anyway, all right, well, well, nonetheless,
even though it is not April first, that was my
early April Fool Show. I, of course, Danny, as you know,
(01:27):
never make a mistake. Everything is done intentionally wrong. Professional
broadcasting at its finest. That's how we roll. So we
have the Skipper Ripper on today's podcast, Safari Kingdom with
a new added feature to Safari Kingdom. And if we
have time, pop no, no, no, no again. I want
(01:52):
the record to show. I want the record to show
there there is nothing this is. This has nothing to
do with Animal thundered, what is going on? Nothing at all.
This is something totally different and really an added featured,
a great bonus to the podcast, just amazing. So but
we'll start with it. So with Major League Baseball beginning.
(02:14):
It was opening day yesterday. They get that right, Danny, Thursday, Yeah, yes,
where are the applause at? Here we go? How about
home off? I'll be here for the whole hour, or
at least part of it. So baseball started. I love baseball.
I did a couple of rants on the Overnight Show.
We did a couple of monologues about baseball this week,
which I loved. I enjoyed that. It was fine, great, wonderful.
(02:36):
There is no better way, though, to celebrate baseball on
this podcast than with audio gold and if you know
what I mean, maybe not, you might not know where
I'm going with this, but if you've heard me yapping
and Danny you know about this. We worked together a
one time. I love the postgame tirade. I love mascots
(02:57):
and postgame tirades there my favorite. So I would like you,
the consumer of this audio content, to settle in to
the spit and Sawdust pub inspired. This was actually inspired
by something that happened on the overnight show leading into
Opening Day because we were yapping. I was I was
(03:18):
giving some thoughts on what I thought was going to
happen in the baseball season, and if he didn't hear that,
Roberto randomly played one of the great postgame rants from
Tommy Lasorda, and then that got me going. We played
a couple other things and that I had this come
to Jesus moment. I said, wait a minute, like, we
(03:39):
don't have the time. On the radio show, we don't
have the time to play all the rants, but on
the podcast we can't. Now the other thing, Danny is
you know that I do not do list radio because
that would be wrong. Never never you like to put
your lists on top up of Mount Rushmore. I don't
(04:04):
believe in that it's lazy. I don't float on the
lazy river. I believe in preparing and showing up and
putting an honest effort in because you, you, the listener,
spend time and I want to put my work in.
So we will not be doing a list, unfortunately you
call yours Mount Rushmore instead. Oh no, no, we will
not be doing a Mount Rushmore. Instead, we will have
(04:26):
Benny's Big Board, which is not a list. It's it's
something totally different's completely kosher. The Malla Militia love Benny's
Big Board. The Malla Militia hate list radio. They don't
like Mount Rushmore, but they love Benny's Big Board. What
it's an ET sketch. It's it's it's amazing. I'll tell
you what it is. I have somewhere here. I have
(04:50):
this right it's that right right there. Okay. It's like
a little dryer race board that probably usually says go
pick up food. Yeah yeah, something like that. Yeah yeah.
So this is going to be the quintessential big board
starting out twenty twenty three, the greatest manager meltdowns in
(05:17):
recorded audio history. In my opinion. In my opinion, these
are my hot takes. These are not your hot takes.
And you can add to this, Danny, as you're appreciative
of the rant by managers as well. So settle back,
get a big bucket of popcorn or whatever you're doing,
and this is going to be out of this world content.
(05:39):
It is going to be a toe tapping good time.
So we start out on Benny's big board. We have
a six pack. A six pack, and there were so
many that did not make the cut, that ended up
on the cutting room floor, but number six, number six.
We start out in Chicago with the White Sox. Let's
(06:04):
go back in the hot tub time machine. We're gonna
set the year to twenty h eight. The Chicago White
Sox are managed by a fiery guy by the name
of Ozzie Gien. He had played shortstop in Chicago Mike
North's best friend. Hey told Stowall, yes, Ozzie believed that
(06:24):
he was better than all of the media and loved
to love to screw around with the baseball media and
Mike North as well. So this is one of many
rants that we could have used. I would have put
this higher. Unfortunately, Ozzy Ozzie was ranting and raving. Some
of it is hard to understand. Some of it is
(06:45):
not the easiest to understand, but listening closely, this is
Ozzie Yan. The White Sox were on a six game
losing streak. Ozzie was very upset with the way the
media was handling things and the way that the fans
of Chicago we're handling the White Sox or play. So
let's go to the audio tape. Here's Ozzy Gian pregame,
(07:09):
ranting about the media and the fans. Oh right now, everybody, no,
but everybody in Chicago. It's try making line nose and
called these guy and called that guy. I mean, we
got fifty people in rothterday and we can do that.
I mean that what teach me? If something about Chicago
fans and Chicago media diff I got pretty quick a
(07:31):
couple of days ago. We wasn't invading the town. Now
with that's that's that's I don't get it, because maybe
the minch they can be that way, you know what
I mean, But God, le Jesus, what will it take
for people real races? Two thousand and seven out of
(07:52):
the months winning winning, We went a couple of years
ago and we old because we've been home twenty years.
They have the best. Okay, we're good everybody. We hold
you to be all the life, no matter how many
worsher we win, we hold we have of Chicago. Chicago,
(08:18):
we got the worser owner. The guy got set rings
and we are holding the owner. I mean no, he's
kind of got a guy or something. Talk about it
for years that you know, it's the way it is.
It's not the bodies, that what it is. He's like
(08:39):
you playing New York or you play team with two
you know, city with two couple of teams. But wow,
you know what I mean, I don't know what we
should do to make people believe or big excited about it. Yeah,
you know what I mean. You've been a couple of
years around and you know what I mean. Well, I
don't know what the say. You know in two thousand
(09:00):
and say we got a good year two thousand and
said we got it really really by year and were
never denyed it. We never did. We never did we
celebrate how about the cup celebrating boot? How many times
curse people? Now? I know, I know I don't have
any I will make a lot of money with my sho.
That's why I gotta keep going because I know in
the future, as it would the morning's head here just
(09:22):
ten years anniversary of my I will call marioity stuff
and I called what the guys and the things when
the radio I coached him out last year, Oh my core. Yeah,
you know, we gotta sell too, you know what I mean?
What sucks. I'm not gonna be up for ten years Bolivia,
my ships. My conflict is going on. Huh. A lot
(09:43):
of people to take you. I don't know about that.
I don't know about that, but you know what I mean,
Hey man, I don't know when people was finding him.
You know we played the real back we yes, we did.
We stalk for for a week. Yeah, I mean better
you know, I I mean, don't too far. Well, I'll go.
We know it was a surprisal baseball the best thing.
How don't they go, Wow, look at the white Now
(10:04):
this on all right there, we go back to back
to normal. We gotta deal with there's nothing we can
do about it. The lumber twenty five guys, I believe
we can do. That's all I care. Everything out He's like, hey,
that was that was enjoyable and there's a theme to
this list. There's a lot of a lot of Chicago.
There's a lot of Chicago on this. Ozzy, his most
(10:29):
famous rant was to a magazine when he got hired
as the Marlins manager and proceeded to endorse Fidel Castro,
and that went over very well. We don't have audio
because there's no audios I know that exists. That by
Ozzy again. Moving on at number five on Big Ben's
Big Board, we go to the heartland of Cansas City,
(10:52):
and this is a classic. I believe this is our
only rant from the nineteen nineties that made Big Ben's
Big Board of manager melt sounds. But number five is
how McCray Now, I'm gonna paint the picture Danny. This
happened in nineteen ninety three. How McCray is in the
(11:13):
manager's office. There are the Royals, I believe are on
the road. He's wearing long John pajamas like like you know,
like he's ready if you go to bed, and he
starts getting more and more worked up with the way
the questions are coming from the Royals beat writers. It
ends up with him throwing a phone. Now what you
(11:35):
can't see on this and this is the part we
have to describe for our blind listeners, especially blind Emmett
the Seahawk fan and blind Scott. So during this rant,
all of the reporters that are in the Royals manager's office,
how McCray, they all leave the office. So what does
(11:55):
how McCray do. He follows them out into the hallway
because he's not done with his rant, and he said
he was sick and tired of the stupid questions. Let's
go to the audio tape how McCray with a masterpiece
where all I had to go after him? Was all
right and I left. So we're swinging a bat bats well,
(12:18):
so I wanted my left hand hitter as a hit.
Did you consider Brett for Miller with a basis Leader
of the Seven? No? No No, I don't ask him all
these stupid ass questions. No, and in the all God
ask questions night hit dreadful. No, Miller, Simon, he's banning stuff.
(12:45):
It just Brant not banging and stuff and it just
funing back back. No, you're thinking my damn food. Yeah,
his thumbs stupid, Absolutely, that stupid ass. Sh I'm not
(13:13):
taking you, guys, I'm not taking no sho players. I'm
sacking time. I'm fan out with everything from you guys
players and they can do it in thing they want
to do. I'm sick and tired of all this bullshit.
Now put that in the fact of the reporters hit
(13:38):
with some of the shrapnel. Yes, yes, that's a great
point we should follow up as this is the quintessential
twenty twenty three manager meltdown rant Benny's Big Board. So
one of the writers was hit right above the eye,
and if I remember the story correctly, he actually had
a pretty serious inch three because when you say throw
(14:02):
a phone today people think of a cell phone. This
was one of those big old school landlines they still
used in the in the early nineteen nineties. So how
heavy they were, they were like little bricks, not even
that little. So how mccraig coming in at number five? Now,
(14:22):
number four is our first surprise on Big Ben's Big Board,
and we go to Seattle, the Seattle Mariners getting a
little love on this, and we welcome in John McLaren,
John McLear, do you even know about this? Rand? I
think you know about this, right? We played this when
(14:43):
you were there, right, yeah, yeah, I've played this on
your live show. Yeah, So I consider this the Swiss
Army Knife of postgame rants, not just in baseball but
in any sport. To set this up, John McClaren was
very unhappy at this. This goes back. I want to
say this happened in the early twenty tens, like twenty eleven,
(15:07):
twenty twelve. I'm not one hundred percent sure on that.
We'd have to go back in double check. But nonetheless,
it doesn't matter when it happy. It's been over ten years.
So John McLaren was unhappy that the team was not
playing well in Seattle. The media was down on the Mariners.
They were disparaging the team the Ohays even before. Okay,
(15:28):
so it's been fifteen years. I didn't realize it's been
that long. So this happened and Ozzie Gain both happened
in oh eight. Who knew so, John John McLaren, the manager,
was upset and he was trying to defend his team.
He gave one of the greatest raw Roz speeches of
all time. Take a listen to the passion from John McLaren.
(15:53):
We're playing all right every day and got nothing to
show for it. I'm tired of losing. I'm trying to
get my beating. So guys, we're got to change this
around and get after it. And only we can do it.
The fans are pissed off, and I'm pissed off, and
the players are pissed off. And that's the way it is.
There's no easy way out here, is clam Field, sorry
(16:15):
for ourselfs got to buckle it up and get after it.
Tr Damn losing his every night, and we bust her.
It's gotta be a toe team effort turn this thing around.
And that's it. The thing about that, Danny hearing it again.
The reason it's the Swiss army knife is because McLaren
(16:37):
does not reference the Mariners. He doesn't reference Seattle. He
doesn't reference any of his players or any coaches, any
of the other players, any of the other coaches. He
doesn't name anything. It is so generic. He doesn't mention baseball.
We have used this as a Swiss army knife anytime
(16:59):
a team is struggling, like I really want I think that, like,
let's just pick a team like the Patriots are struggling.
Bill Belichick really let into his team. Here's the sound
of Bill Belichick complaining about his team. And then and
there you go. It works for everything. It's a Swiss
Army knife of rants. So congratulations to John McLaren and
the Mariners your job. Coming in at number four, number
(17:22):
three a bit of a surprise. A lot of people
thought this would be higher, this guy would be higher.
Tommy Lasorda, you got a couple of the best rants
in the history of Rance. Yeah, Tommy is great. It's
and I knew Tommy a little bit passed away a
(17:44):
while back, not that long actually, but he actually makes
there's a double dose of Lasordi here. There's two of these.
And the only reason that Tommy's not number one or
number two is because it's like top forty radio. Danny.
I've heard these so many times over the years. I'm
(18:05):
a little I'm a little burned out on him, you
know what I mean. It's like hearing the song featuring Acon.
It's just they're burned into my head. So the most
famous Lessorda rant, which is his gold standard, his masterpiece,
was about Dave Kingman's performance. This comes from nineteen seventy eight.
(18:26):
Was May fourteenth, nineteen seventy eight, Dodgers laying the mets
at Dodger Stadium and Dave Kingman it now one, not two,
but three, three home runs, and that led to Paul
Olden asking the most famous question ever asked to Tommy Lasorda,
(18:50):
can you give us just a few basic comments about
the their pianos on the game. Well, naturally, I feel
bad about losing a ballgame like that. There's no way
you should lose that ball game, and that just doesn't
make sense. It's your opinion of King's performance? What's my
opinion of King's performance? What you think? It's my opinion
(19:13):
of it? I think it was put that in. I
don't opinion of his performance. He beat us with three
home runs? What if you mean what is my opinion
of his performance? How could you ask me a question
like that? What is my opinion of his of his performance?
He hit three home runs? I'm stoff to lose the
(19:37):
game and you ask me my opinion of his performance.
I mean that's a tough question to ask me, isn't it.
What is my opinion of his performance? Yes, it is?
I ask it and you gave me an answer. Well,
I didn't give you a good answer because I'm mad,
But I mean it wasn't a good question. It's a
tough question. To ask me right now, what is my
(19:59):
opinion of it performance? I mean, you want me to
tell you what my opinion of his performance Isn't they did?
That's right. Guy hits three home runs against us. That
is Oh, that's a fucking good time right there. It is.
(20:20):
And Danny, I'm happy to report that I have met
the great Paul Olden. He's an LA radio legend and
he has been the public address announcer. The man that
asked that question has been the public address announcer for
the New York Yankees for many years now. He was
the Super Bowl public address announcer. He's done play by
(20:42):
play for multiple Major league teams over the years. Paul
Olden is his name. We have a mutual friend, the
great Ted Sobel, who used to work at Fox Sports
Radio's friends with Paul. Yeah, I know t yeah, So
they worked together. So I have met Paul Olden and
he's he went off and had an amazing career which
(21:03):
is continuing to this day. As his sole job, he
gets paid a great amount of money to be the
public address announcer the Yankees. He goes to Florida for
a month, does spring training, and then he does the
six months during the baseball season, but only when the
Yankees are at home. And that's it. That's his gig,
that's all he does. How great is that? What a life? Yeah,
(21:25):
So that's not the main less sort of rant that
I love. My favorite is this next rant that we're
going to play on Benny's big board. Tommy Lessorta coming
in at number three, and that is all about Kurt
Bavakua of the Padres. So the Kingman rant was from
nineteen seventy eight. This one's from July nineteen eighty two,
(21:48):
and the Dodgers had a picture named Tom needonfuer piece
of crap. Yeah. He's most famous for serving up a
meatball to Jack Clark and Petro Guerrero slamming his glove
down on the outfield. Yeah yeah, in the nineteen eighty
five National League Championship Series. But this is nineteen eighty two,
and didn't need and fewer Mary like a Hollywood starlet
(22:11):
or showgirl or something like that, if I remember correct
anyway that matter, So I don't know. I hope she
abused him, though, So Needon Fuor was fine. This is hilarious.
Nineteen eighty two, he was fined five hundred dollars for
beating a San Diego player named Jim LaFeber, who would
go on and manage in the Big League. So this
is just a random game. Needon Fuor gets fined. The
(22:33):
next day, his teammate Kurt Bovacua of the Padres was
quoted in the newspapers as saying the guy they should
have fined was the guy who ordered Needon Fuor to
throw at Joe, that fat little Italian. That was the
quest that made the newspaper dann oh man, imagine if
(22:55):
that happened today, Holy racist racist right right, you can't
do that and fattest, But Bavakwa did it. And then
what do you think happened? The next day the reporter's
pregame asked Tommy Losorda. They said, hey, Tommy Bakwa called
you a fat little Italian? What do you think about that?
(23:17):
And Tommy Lasorda went full Hindenburg on Kurt Buffakwa in
the Padres And to me, this is the greatest Losorda
rant of them all, and here it is. Tell you
what I think about it. I think that is very,
very bad for that man to make an accusation like that,
(23:39):
that is terrible. I have never, ever since I've managed,
ever told a picture to throw it anybody, nor will
I ever, and if I ever did, I certainly wouldn't
make him throw at a fucking one hundred and thirty
hitter black Lafae or fucking Bavakua, who could hit water
(24:03):
if he fell out of a fucking boat. And I
guarant fucking te you this. When I pitched and I
was going to pitch against a fucking team that had
guys on it like Bavakwa, I sent a fucking limousine
to get the cocksucker to make sure he was in
the motherfucking lineup, because I kicked that cocksucker's at any
fucking day in a week. He's a fucking motherfucking big mouth.
(24:25):
I'll say it. At Laudre's organization to this day has
never recovered that line Bavakua couldn't hit water if he
fell out of a fucking boat is one of the
all time great lines that Lasorda has used, and he
used the classic I'd send a limo to the you know,
(24:45):
to pick that guy up, and oh it's hilarious, and
I would like to pass on. I've mentioned this in
the past, but the late great Joe McDonald who was
an LA radio legend, and it was a friend of mine,
and Joel was inside all the Dodger Locker Roman events
from the seventies through the eighties and the nineties, and
he saw and did it all in that era when
Losorda was there. And he told me, and several others
(25:09):
have confirmed it that the greatest rants by the Sorta,
most of his great rants were not even recorded by microphones.
That's how prolific Losorda was because after the Kingman and
the Bavocua, he would check to make sure people did
not have a radio microphone. He would do it for
(25:30):
the writers sometimes, but when the radio guys were around,
he would he would slow his role. So it had
to be one of those little handheld recorders, right, yeah, yeah,
one of those little tape recorders, the cassette tape thing.
So moving on Benny's big board. This is honoring baseball's
opening day. You have tuned into the quintessential, the quintessential
(25:52):
big board greatest manager meltdowns. In my opinion, this is
my list, It's not yours. This has been a great
mount rushmore so far. No, no, no, no, no Mault Rushmore. No, No,
we don't believe in that. That's lazy podcasting. So number two,
we had an amazing, amazing library of audio clips from
this guy to choose from. He is the former manager
(26:15):
and I believe he's in the Hall of Fame. Earl Weaver.
Earl Weaver coming in at number two, A couple of classics.
We had many to choose from. Like I said, the
first one that made the cut Earl Weaver. This goes back.
I believe it was the late seventies, early eighties, and
on only exact date on this one either, but Earl
(26:37):
Weaver got into it during an Orioles Tigers game with
Bill Haller. Was the name h A. L. L Er,
not Maller Haller, Bill Hawler. And at the beginning of
this clip, you'll hear Eddie Murray at the start, and
then Earl Weaver enters. He comes running in. He's a
(27:00):
very small man, Earl Weaver, he's an old man at
this point. He runs over and he wants Bill Howard
Howler to know how he feels. And let's just say
Earl does not does not pull punches that. Let's go
to the audio tape. There's not a behind the rubber,
behind the rubber, he's not the golf behind. He didn't
(27:23):
go rub for you looking at him. He didn't know English.
That's behind the rubbers. Cruise, you're just the fuck us.
That's great, Yo, out run yourself, earl. You run yourself girl?
(27:49):
You mean yeah, I'm glad that Jap fuck up. You're
bushes and years. He don't you ever put your finger
on me? And you hit me? Girl? You don't put
your finger talking. Hi, get right, Yo, ain't gonna knock
(28:13):
nobody on her lass. You're doing again and I'm not.
You're right, And you know I didn't touch you. You
did not. No, you're lying, damn hiring. No, you who
aren't liar? I'm like liar. You're are a liar. You
are liar. You are tell you no, you have for
(28:37):
one reason to fuck istub wrong. That's the only race
in your own girl, and you'll have your chance tomorrow.
Quick's wrong with you? You ain't no good? No, you
aren't either. You're no good. You're no fucking good. Here. No,
I shall never have our game. So I hope you.
I want to run here? What do I What are
you doing here? Now? Well? Why don't you call the
(28:59):
the Govins and ask me I will oh good, don't
think I won't good day, And the quicker you get
on it'll be better too. Oh yeah, that's right. You
ain't going nowhere. You aren't either. I ten fucking years
to now. Who's in the Hall of Fame? Well, you're
(29:20):
gonna be in the whole no it right? You will
know a Brochers, you know it. You're gonna be in
the Hall of fay one more than I've lost you.
I know you're having a game. You better get gone,
and I'm i gotta get horribly better get gone. What
the hell you that you had your hands on it?
(29:52):
Now that's wrong? Long now, this one, Danny my favorite line.
When Earl comes out. The first thing he says to
the umpire, that guy Bill Holler is you are here
to fuck us? That is hilarious. And then at the
(30:13):
end of it you've heard Danny the umpire he responds
to one of the lines that Weaver says. The umpire
shoots back. He says, yeah, You're gonna be in the
Hall of Fame for fucking up the world series is
what he tells Earl Weaver on the field. It was
it was outstanding, just just wonderful, and I love it,
(30:36):
loved it, loved it, loved it all right, moving on that,
staying with Earl Weaver, and this is the main reason
Earl Weaver is at number two, not Tommy Lasorda. It's
the Manager's Corner pregame show for the Orioles Radio Network,
and Earl Weaver sat down with the one of the
oil broadcasters and delivered one of the funniest couple of
(31:01):
minutes you will ever hear from a baseball manager. And
let's go to the audio tape and now to the
Manager's Corner with Earl Weaver. Hi, everybody, this is Earl
Weaver with Manager's Corner. Today. I have Tom Moore, orio broadcaster,
back on the show. And I understand Tom's been getting
(31:21):
some mail with questions that supposedly I can answer. Now,
what the fuck are somebody's goddamn questions? Tom? Well, First
of all, Earl George Moore from Baltimore, I was asking
how much we feel the loss of Don Stanhouse. Well,
Don Stanhouse was an asshole. He had us in trouble,
had to fucking bases loaded, God damn it. Almost every
fucking time he went out there. He liked to ruin
(31:43):
my health smoking cigarettes. And thank god we got Timmy
Stoddard coming in out to bullpen right now sticking a
bat up their asses. And that's what it takes. Well,
Bill Whitehouse, Earl, that certainly is an answer from Frederick
Maryland wants to know why you and the Orioles don't
go out and get some more teams speed speed. For
Christ's sake, you get fucking goddamn little fleas on a
fucking basis, getting picked off, trying to steal, getting thrown out,
(32:07):
taking runs away from you. You get them big cocksuckers
that can hit the fucking ball out the ballpark, and
you can't make any goddamn mistakes. Well, certainly this show
is going to get out in history. Earl. Terry Elliott
of Washington, DC, Why wants to know why you don't
use Terry Crowley as a designated hitter all the time. Well,
Terry Crowley's lucky's in fucking baseball. For Christ's sake. He
was released by the Cincinnata Reds. He was released by
(32:29):
the fucking goddamn Atlanta Braves. We saw that Terry Crowley
could sit on his fucking ask for eight internes and
enjoy watching a baseball game just like any other fan,
and has the ability to get up there and break
one open in the fucking ninth. So if this cocksicker'd
mind his own business and let me manage the fucking team,
we'd be a lot better off. Well, certainly you've made
your opinions known on the fans questions about baseball, Earl,
(32:50):
but let's get to something else. Alice Sweet from Norfolk
wants to know the best time to put in the
tobata plan. Ellice sweethought to be worried about where the
fuck her next lay is coming from more rather than
were next goddamn tomato plants coming from. She get her
ass out to fucking bars at night and go hustling
around to goddamn street. She might get a prick stuck
in her once in a while. I don't understand where
(33:10):
these questions are coming from. Tom That's about it for
Manager's Corner. Go fuck yourself and the fuck with your
show coming up next on the Baltimore Oriole Baseball fucking Network.
Double Manager's Corner with Earl Weaver has heard twenty minutes
before every Orioles regular season game. Man I guess we
(33:32):
should point out, Danny, this did not actually air. That
never actually aired on the Baltimore Orioles Baseball fucking network.
It why, I don't know why. I don't know why.
He had a couple of brilliant lines. This was as
good as some of the all time great comedy rants
you think of historically, Abbott and Costello, things like that.
(33:55):
But Earl Weaver when he said Don Standhouse was an
asshole one of his former players, he said, Terry Crowley
is lucky he's in baseball. He can sit his fucking
ass for eight innings just like any other fan. And
then the end of that, Danny when he's talking about
the tomato plants, Oh my god, is that hilarious alice
(34:17):
sweet from Norfolk and the tomato plant. That's a ten.
That's a ten. That's a ten. When did Weaver pass away?
He actually died on a Baltimore Oriole fan cruise. You
know how they have those fan cruises in the office. Yeah,
he passed away on a cruise ship. Oh damn. Yeah,
(34:39):
if I remember correctly, I believe that. What a way
to go. Yeah, you're right at the Caribbean Sea. It
says twenty thirteen. Yeah. Fortunately they did not dump him overboard.
They actually took him back for a proper, proper burial.
But Earl, what a fiery man. The number one, number one,
(35:01):
number one on big Ben's big board, not a list,
not a list, number one a big Ben's big board. Well,
this one is. This is Picasso, this is Rembrandt, this
is the greats, this is NISI. What's the guy's name,
I can't even think of the guy's name, Danny. What's
the guy's name? Beethoven? Beethoven, whatever hell did? This is great?
(35:26):
So Beethoven. So we go now back to Chicago. We
started Big Ben's Big board in Chicago. We go back
to Chicago. Lee Elia, Oh yeah, Lee Ilia is the
NaN's name. It is the secretariat of manager meltdowns. In
my life. No one will ever pass this by. Lee
(35:49):
Elia broke the cardinal rule of business. You never attacked
the customer. The customer is always right. This was we'recorded
by the late great Less Grobstein in Chicago. I was
lucky enough to meet Less Grobstein. Very happy about that.
And Less also passed away not that long ago. But
(36:11):
Less was the only radio man that had a microphone
in the room. This is April twenty ninth, nineteen eighty three.
The Cubs are out of the gates slow first nineteen games.
The Chicago Cubs were five and fourteen. The fans were
razing the players at Wrigley Field. The Cubs had just
(36:31):
lost a game to the Dodgers. They lost, the Dodgers
beat them on a wild pitch by Lee Smith, and
the Dodgers scored the winning run. And so, needless to say,
the Cubs were in a bad mood. And then after
the game, this is so long ago, the clubhouses for
the teams were out in the outfield, So the Cub
(36:51):
players had to walk out to left field because that's
where the clubhouse was, out in left field. And after
the game, fans were pouring beer and other food items
trash on Keith Morland, Larry Boa, and Ron Say. So
they were just throwing all this crap and beer on
(37:14):
these guys. And Lee Elia was furious. He found out
about it, and he was having none of it. And
that provided us with this audio poetry Number one, Lee Ilia,
I'll tell you one fucking thing. I hope we get
fucking hot shit just to suff it up them. Three
(37:35):
thousand fucking people to show up every fucking day, because
if they're the real Chicago fucking fans, they can kiss
my fucking hands right downtown and print it. They're really
really behind you around here. My fucking hands am I
(37:55):
supposed to do? Go out there and let my fucking
players get destroyed every day and be quiet about it.
For the fucking Nickeldine people to show up. The motherfuckers
don't even work. That's why they're out of the fucking game.
They're only go out and get a fucking job and
find out what it's like to go out there in
a fucking living. Eighty five percent of the fucking world
work it. The other fifteen come out here the fucking
(38:18):
playground for the cocksuckers. Rip them, mother fuckers, Rip them
tucked cocksuckers. Like the fucking players got guys bucks in
their fucking ads for the fucking people through and that's
the cup My fucking ads then guck about the great
fucking support that the players get around here. I haven't
(38:41):
seen it this fucking here. The name of the game
has hit the ball, catch the ball, and get the
fucking job done. Right now, we have more losses than
we have wins. The fucking changes that have happened in
a couple organizations are multifolds, all right. They don't show
because we're five and fourth teams, And unfortunately that's the
(39:03):
criteria of them. Some fifteen motherfucking percent to come out
to day baseball. The other eighty five percent are earning
a living. It'll take more than a five and thirteen
or five and fourteen to destroy the makeup of this club.
I'll guarantee you that there's some fucking pros out there
that want to fucking play this game. But you're sucking
(39:28):
a fucking sigma. The fucking Dodgers and the Phillies and
the Cardinals and all that cheap shit. All these mother
fucking editorials about say and fucking uh, the phillyitis and
all that should that did sickening. It's unbelievable, it really is.
It's a disheartening fucking situation. We're right now five and fourteen.
(39:51):
Doesn't the gate all that work one hundred and forty
three fucking games left. What I'm trying to say it,
don't rip them fucking guys out there ripped me? Can
I want to rip somebody? Rip my fucking head but
don't rip them fucking guys because they're kivin everything they
can get. But once we hit that fucking groove, it
(40:14):
will flow, and it will flow the talents there. I
don't know how to make it any clarity you. I'm frustrated.
I'll guarantee I'm frustrated. It'd be different if I walked
into this room every day at eight thirty and saw
a bunch of guys they didn't give a shit. They
give a shit, and it's a tough Natalie Gees. The
thing about this dandy which is wild to me is
(40:37):
Lee Elia was fired as Cub manager. This happened April
twenty ninth. You know when Lee lost his job. I'm
gonna take a guess a month later? No, how about August?
He through May, June, July, three more months, and then
in August of nineteen eighty three for reasons completely not
(41:00):
related to that clip, because it was never broadcast, at
least not the full rant, and he was let go
because the team was not playing well. The Cubs did
not play well, but Leela actually survived. What was his
math there? Oh, the eighty five percent of the world's
work and the other fifteen percent come out here. It's
a playground for the blank blanks. Take that for data.
(41:25):
You get a real job, God, and get a real
job and all that nonsense. Blank my blank and blank
you exactly exactly. So that is big bench, big board.
Thank you for putting up with that. And the bad
news is that kidding? That's gonna be the best thing
that I've heard all week? All right, No, it's it's
(41:45):
it's it's it's wonderful. So yeah, why why don't you
want to do the Safari Kingdom? You want to push
that to the the Saturday podcast. We do the Safari Kingdom?
You want? You want to do it? Yeah, we can
fit Safari Kingdom in here. All right, let's do it.
And it is now an official bit, Danny g. As
you know, our man Ohio Ow has come through. We've
(42:07):
got a very little jingle, a small jingle, the work
of Ohio Aw. And here it is. It's time for
Kingdom with dang radio alight and look at that. We
just got a cease and desist from Clay Travis. No,
(42:29):
this is not this is not animal underdome. There's no thunderdome.
This is something completely different. I'm sure that'll solve it.
This is Safari Kingdom. And these are a few animal stories.
Why not. People love animals, and these are animal related stories.
And sometimes they're bugs, sometimes they're animals. Everyone loves their dogs.
(42:51):
And Prada, the high falutin brand Prada, has decided that
they would like to take advantage of rich people that
have a lot of extra money, as they have debuted
a brand new dog code inspired by high fashion human designs,
and they are selling a dog coade for seven hundred
(43:15):
and ninety five dollars. Get the fuck out of here. Yeah,
anyone that buys that should be sentenced to some kind
of public service. Seven hundred ninety five dollars for a
fucking dog coat? Are you kidding me? Come on, Yeah,
that's how much the pure bread mutt cost. It costs
(43:37):
more than that. Now, man, some of these I know,
if you get a good deal on one without papers,
you know, somebody that's wild. How about this story out
of Missouri. A woman is being forced to pay peta
two hundred thousand dollars in legal fees. The People against
(43:58):
the Ethical Treatment of Animals, the people who you know,
don't want to seat meat Peter and so anyway, this
this woman two hundred thousand dollars in legal fees. Why
she faked a chimp's death and a cremation. Yeah, she's
(44:21):
ordered to pay two hundred thousand dollars in legal fees.
She faked the death of a movie star chimp that
had a role in a movie from the nineteen nineties.
Film it was called Buddy Goop was in that Yeah, exactly.
So a federal court ruled that this woman, Tanya, has
to give over two hundred, two hundred and twenty five
(44:42):
thousand dollars in legal fees to the animal rights group
because her tail and the chimpanzee that she was carrying
for Tonka had had died was cremated, and all that
the false death claim was relayed under oath. It resulted
in PETA needing to build for hundreds of attorney work
(45:05):
hours that they claim cost thousands of dollars, and so
Pee is like, you gotta pay us that money. And
it turns out that a judge in Saint Louis is like, yeah,
you gotta pay this money. The moral is, do not
do not fake a story and have Peter investigate, or
you're gonna be up shit creek and without without a paddle.
(45:29):
So that's that's unfortunate. It's unfortunate. Next up on the
Safari Kingdom. You see that story out of Colorado, a
mountain lion attacking a dude in a hot tub. Oh
I saw this. Yeah, that is that's gotta be everyone's nightmare.
Is there is there any way that that is not
everyone's nightmare to be in a hot tub at a
(45:50):
rental home. I guess you are relaxed when the accident happens. Yeah,
so this mountain lion clawed at this dude. He and
his wife were just kind of hanging out and having
a good time. They renting those place and lounging in
the in the hot tub and out in the woods.
(46:10):
And it's about eight o'clock. And this happened a couple
of weeks ago in Colorado. And the guys like, yeah,
I felt so, I felt something grab grabbed my head
and yeah, they must have really been in a tranquil state,
like with their eyes closed. Do you think the wife
(46:30):
was like, oh, honey, you're Viagaras kicking in. Slap me
around a little bit. Wow. And the way this ended
the story is like the wife Danny grabbed the flashlight
points it towards the mountain lion. Yeah, the husband and
the wife they start screaming at the mountain lion and
then eventually the mountain lions all right, fuck you, and
(46:52):
then then walks back into the into the woods. But
here's the problem, man, at some point, you gotta get
out of a hot tub, right, and don't you think
that mountain lion is still lurking off in the shadows
in the woods waiting to pounce on you. Man, talk
about being a sitting duck. Hello. The husband had four scratches,
(47:20):
but it was all superficial on the top of his
head and near his right eye. That could have taken
the dude's right eye out. Yeah. Man, and the officers
inspected the wounds, they said they didn't match a mountain lion. Well,
here's something from the insect world on Safari Kingdom. Because
insects are part of the Safari. Female spiders, according to
(47:43):
new research, played dead when they're having sex. Why do
they play dead, Danny, You want to take a guess
they're not into their husbands. No, female spiders played dead
during sex, so males don't have to worry about being eaten. Hello, Yeah,
(48:03):
I mean I've heard the stories about how they eat
there they're afterwards, right, yeah. Yeah. According to new research,
the female spiders played dead during sex, so the males
are a little less worried that they might be eaten
when the deed is done chans and that in turn
(48:24):
makes it easier for the females to choose the best
mates by playing dead for appealing to partners fighting off
the scrubs. So, I don't know. You think they've they've
gotten in the mind of spiders, You think so, I don't.
They claimed they've researched it. They claimed they've done their
(48:45):
homework and they've gotten to the bottom of it. This
is an interesting story out of Australia. That's hard. Have
you seen the photo of the World's Happiest cow Danny? No,
you have not. I gonsa send you this photo. If
you're listening to the podcast, just imagine what this looks like.
(49:07):
I'm gonna hold on, say, i gotta click a couple
of buttons here, and then I'm gonna send this to
you and and then Danny, you can describe exactly what's
in in the photo. But this has been bouncing around
social media for the last few days. It's it's in
the echo chamber. See that. Oh yeah, what is what
(49:31):
is that? Danny? Oh that's crazy looking, isn't that awesome?
On the side, it's white, racist all through the middle
of the cow. And on its side it's a happy face. Yeah,
it's the happiest cow around. Did dark markings look like
a smiley face? Yeah? So this happened earlier in the
(49:52):
month of March and freaky right. The the it's now
become the mascot of a dairy in Australia and they've
they've they're gonna use this for different events in promotions
and whatnot, and so that cow will live a wonderful
(50:13):
life and not have to worry about anything. Everything's taken
care of for that cow. It's the world's happiest cow.
And on the left side it's got a smiley face,
like a smiley emotion. So that's kind of cool. There
you go. Yeah, The owners decided to sell him after
being overwhelmed by media attention. Yeah, I think I think
(50:36):
we're you're gonna make some make some money on this,
why not? What the hell? All right, Well, that's it,
we'll get out on that. Anything you want to promote
Danny on Friday, which is not April first, It is not.
That was a false alarm. It is not April first. Yeah,
last day of March. You're done with your radio shift.
I still need to go into mine this afternoon. Produce
(50:57):
a fun Coveno and Rich Friday show for two to
four pm West Coast Time Outstanding. Enjoy that Cavino and Rich.
They actually have stuff they give away on that show,
unlike our show. We don't give any on my overnight show.
We don't have we don't have any budget. We give
nothing away. But I have a great head. You give
trips away, well, we do give that is correct. We
do give the trip round trip to nowhere, and we
(51:18):
have a lifetime supply nothing and nobody else is giving
those things away. So that is true. That is accurate.
And we have a great rest of your day, and
got a big podcast weekend all weekend long and we'll
catch you next time later. Skater gott a murder, Gotta
go
Host
Ben Maller
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