October 11, 2024 • 32 mins
Ben Maller (produced by Danny G.) has a fun Friday for you! He talks: Sausage Pizza, Does Anyone Have a Watch, Foodie Fun, Phrase of the Week, & more!
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Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:00):
Kubbooms.
Speaker 2 (00:02):
If you thought four hours a day, twelve hundred minutes
a week was enough, think again. He's the last remnants
of the old Republic, a soul fashion of fairness. He
treats crackheads in the ghetto gutter the same as the
rich pill poppers in the penthouse.
Speaker 1 (00:18):
Wow.
Speaker 2 (00:18):
It's a clearinghouse of hot takes. Break free for something special.
The Fifth Hour with Ben Maller starts right now.
Speaker 1 (00:29):
It the air everywhere. The Fifth Hour with me Ben
Mahler and Danny G Radio hanging out with you all
weekend as we talk in circles. It's a podcast. It's
so simple. This is not the original recipe Ben Mahler
show that you hear overnight. No, no, no, this is
(00:50):
the Extra Crispy, Extra Spicy Fifth Hour Podcast. As we
are here every Friday, Saturday and Sunday to provide you
with weekend entertainment in the audio Sweatshop. Now, Danny G
is not with me yet again here on Friday. He'll
be back for these Saturday and Sunday podcasts as we
(01:12):
attempt to kick butt. Now, normally we have a certain routine.
If you've listened to this podcast, you know that We
typically start out by looking at some dopey holidays that
are taking place. Now we've been doing this for many,
many months, and today would be the worst day that
I can remember for cheeseball holidays. I was trying, I
(01:36):
was just trying to find something that seemed fun, something
that seemed interesting, and there's just nothing there. Like the
one that stood out is National Sausage Pizza Day. Does
sausage pizza need its own day? Isn't there just a
there's a pizza Day and that should be fine, but
there's a sausage Pizza Day, and then there's like a
(01:56):
bunch of other stuff just aren't any good that are
just kind of dumb. So bad day for holidays. But
the show must go on. The show must go on
for us peasants, the common man, the hoi POLOI, the
rank and file. Everyone to say it. And on this podcast,
(02:17):
the Friday edition, the eleventh of October, we've got does
anyone have a watch? Mayor Aura? Foody fun and the
phrase of the week. The phrase of the week, But
as always we start with the shameless promotion for the
(02:38):
number one TV show that you're gonna watch this weekend,
and it still amazes me that my name is on it.
It is Benny versus the Penny, and I am a
proud papa, if you will. Many of you have taken
time out and sent me photographs of you watching the
(03:00):
show and not only watching it at home, and those
are great. Those are wonderful. Are our friend in the
Minneapolis area, she's got a nice cabin, just just awesome,
and some of the other photos. But people have been
sending me photos from restaurants, which is awesome. One guy
(03:22):
in New Hampshire was at a sports bar, which I
didn't even know they had sports bars in New Hampshire.
It's not very big. I know they have a nice
little Portsmouth is a nice little tourist town, but I
haven't really sport New Hampshire too much. But anyway, the
guy sent me a photo at some sports bars said yeah,
they have it on there. You're on the tv there
in the sports bar. I said, well, that's pretty cool,
(03:43):
so thank you for that. My email, you neither send
it to benmalorshow at gmail dot com or the Fifth
Hour podcast email. We have our own email, which is
probably better that way because that's what I use for
the podcast when I'm getting ready for the podcast. I
normally go going through the email and it's kind of
my routine. So if you want to send something in
(04:04):
real fifth hour at gmail dot com and it is
available starting today all over the place. Benny Versus the Penny,
the first episode of Benny Versus the Penny will air
at six pm today Boston, NBC Sports Boston, right after
the simulcast of Felger and Maz It ends at six
(04:26):
and then our show begins handicapping as I analyze all
the big games and we go head to head against
the Penny. Now, I have not seen the episode this
weekend's episode. We were doing it yesterday at Universal Studios.
We were taping it and it was a fun, fun
(04:47):
show to tape. I'm not sure what the final product
is going to be. I'm hoping there is a Looney
blooper that made the show. There was a debate in
the control room among the the boys that work on
the show. Vinnie and John I think was part of that,
and a couple of the other big guys there that
(05:07):
are involved in trying to put together and then we
do a couple of takes and then normally we try
to just do one take but typically we end up
having to do a couple and so we don't know
what you don't know, so we'll find out. I will
find out with you. And on NBC Sports Boston, the
show will air a bunch. Not only is it air
at six o'clock, but also at eight thirty. There's another
(05:27):
showing at nine to thirty. So three showings of Benny
Versus the Penny in Boston tonight, and that's the flagship
of the show because it's produced out of NBC Sports Boston,
but it is also on in many many other locations,
some I don't even know about. It's on in Philadelphia,
(05:50):
Home of the Fight in Phills. That'll be at six
point thirty if you're in Philly on NBC Sports Philadelphia
six thirty tonight, right after Birds Huddle with Barrett Brooks
and Birds Huddle. I think I know what that's about
being in Philadelphia. But anyway, that's available Benny Versus the
Penny six thirty in Philadelphia. Check your local TV listings
(06:14):
for the time in your area. And if you don't
have an NBC Sports regional cable channel or affiliate near you,
I know we're on in La on the Laker station,
for example, which is partnered with NBC but not a
technical NBC station, not run not operated by NBC, so
there is that. And also on Peacock streaming nationally, you
(06:38):
can always get your hands on Benny versus the Penny
every single moment, all weekend long, starting later today. It
might not be up right now if you're listening early.
This podcast goes up relatively early in the day. I'm
not even really sure exactly when the podcast or the
TV show rather goes on Peacock, but it's available once
(07:01):
it goes up, usually late afternoon, sometimes early evening on Friday,
which is today, and then it'll be all Saturday and
then you can watch it. And I don't think old
episodes are available, so you really have to watch it
when the newest episode is available. So with that as
the backdrop, let's go back to last Friday. You might
(07:25):
remember I was still recovering from a tongue injury. This
job is not that easy. I had bitten my tongue,
which is not as bad as burning your tongue, but
in the same family. So I'd bitten my tongue the
left side of my tongue, and it was causing me
a whole lot of problems. I was able to do
(07:47):
the show, but it was very uncomfortable. It wasn't fun.
It's still not all the way back to where it
needs to be because I'm still talking a lot, and
so it's getting better. I'm almost where I want to be,
but still off a little bit little whacky, a little bit,
a little bit of whacking. And it's going on. But
my schedule, I have first world problems. My schedule is
(08:10):
one where I'm very very busy for several days during
the week. Wednesday, Thursday, and Friday are not not good
good days. Now they are good days because I love
what I do and I like my job, and so
it's fun. But I am burning the midnight oil and
(08:34):
then some. And I'm not doing it at lavish parties,
these extravagant upscale shin digs. No, I'm not doing it
at private meetings. I am doing it with my face
either buried into a microphone or buried into my laptop
as I try to put together the handicapping for the
(08:56):
weekend's NFL games. And so that's my routine, and it's
the malor O rama. And really it starts on Tuesday,
you know, I wait for the Monday game day. And
that's something new that I did last year. I'd start
doing it on Monday, and I was like, I need
to get the final numbers. So I wait till the
Monday night games are over, and then I see whether
(09:18):
or not my picks collapsed or not, and which games
laid an egg and where I whiffed and all that,
and then try to figure it out. But I typically
wait till Tuesday. Right after the show on Tuesday morning,
I go right to it and I spend a good
amount of time handicapping on Tuesday. And then Wednesday's the
(09:38):
big big day. You start getting injury reports, which is
a big part of this. Who's playing, who's not playing,
and so that's that's a big part of it. But
I'm up a lot. I don't get a lot of sleep.
And then Thursday we do the show and we record
the TV show and then I've got to deal with
rush hour traffic from Universal Studio, and I have to
(10:01):
get ready for the other show, the radio show, the
live show, and so I end up getting maybe two
to three hours maybe. Now usually I'm a four to
five hour sleep guy. So you say, well, that's not
that big a deal. You're only getting a little bit less.
But apparently anything under four problematic, right, I'm on vapors.
(10:22):
I am on absolute vapors by that point. And so
what ended up happening is last Friday, after I recorded
the podcast early Friday morning, I then send it to Danny,
who is the producer of the podcast as well as
my right hand man, and then Danny futses around with
(10:45):
it and makes it sound pretty and makes it sound
like I know what I'm doing, and then we put
that up and then that's it. I'm done for the day,
and so I go And this day I was like,
I want to kind of relax and meditate, so I'm
gonna go the bathtub. So I went to the bathtub,
the Mallard tub. I took about a twenty five minute
bath with that bubble soap. Everyone was great, loved it.
(11:09):
My right hand was getting a workout. Don't do that
very often. Don't do it very often. And I just
needed to decompress from the week, and my mind was
spinning and all that. You know what it's like, right,
We've all been there, whether you have a job like
mine or you have a different job, but we've all
got stresses in our lives. So I took a sleeping
pill the only way I will get more than four
(11:30):
hours sleeping. Now keep in mind, I probably didn't need
one because I was so tired from what had happened
the last couple of days. But I was like, listen,
I want to make sure I get a deep sleep,
and so I'm going to take this this Kirkland brand
sleep aid. So I did, and I went to bed
way after the sun came up, and I woke up,
(11:51):
and I wonder if you've ever had this happen. It's
happened to me a few times, especially doing overnights, and
chances are you probably do work overnight. Most of the
people that listen work overnight, although we have people that
graduated that are in good spirits because they work the
dread to day shift. But you go to bed after
the sun comes up, and you wake up discombobulated, you
(12:17):
know what I'm saying, Like you you're so zonked out,
and then you wake up, and you know there's a
normal period of time when you wake up you just
kind of gotta get going. I'm typically get out of
the bed quick, guy, get it over with guy. That's
me because once I'm up, I'm up, I don't I
don't go back to sleep. I don't. Once in a
(12:37):
blue moon, I'll go back to sleep, and I don't
sleep with a sound sleep. So I'm wake up and
I'm discombobulated as groggy feeling. It's kind of like the
Twilight Zone. It's like the Twilight Zone. I'm not really
sure if I'm alive, if somehow I'm dead and I'm
(13:00):
I'm in a parallel dimension. I mean, I'm not exactly sure.
Maybe I'm in the outskirts of reality picture if you
will a world, or you wake up and you're not
sure what time it is or where you are exactly.
You're confused, and I'm thinking, does anyone have a watch? Well,
(13:24):
who uses watches? I have a watch. I have an
Apple Watch. I don't have a Walker Bueller one hundred
thousand dollar watch. But I ended up grabbing my phone
and eventually I realized that I had slept through almost
all of the daylight hours. My alarm clock went off,
(13:44):
and I kept sleeping. I was not tired, and I
awoke with about thirty minutes of sunlight and the sun
was starting to go down. It was starting to go down.
So it's that bizarro world situation. You're like, oh man,
(14:06):
I am literally living in the darkness, right. You're traveling
through another dimension, a dimension not only of sight and sound,
but of mind, a journey into a wondrous land whose
boundaries are that of imagination. The sign posts up ahead
your next stop the twilight Zone.
Speaker 2 (14:27):
Do do do Do Do Do Do Do Do Do
Do Do Do Do Do do do do do doo.
Speaker 1 (14:31):
So I was like, who goofed? I've got to know?
And then I'm like, this is I mean, I didn't
plan on sleeping that long. I mean I only get
like a day and a half off. I want to
enjoy my time, and I got the podcast to do
still over the weedend anyway, so I woke up, me
and the wife. We quickly drove to my favorite taco
place now my I love Tacos delrado is what it's
(14:54):
called tacos dorato, which is crunchy tacos. I used to
go to Tito's Tacos in La Here. I love Tito's Tacos.
I was a loyal Tito's Tacos customer for over twenty years,
and I will not go back because I say I
will not go back unless somebody drags me there because
it's too expensive. It's ridiculous. The same thing that I
(15:17):
got for like two dollars or a dollar fifty is
now like six dollars. It's insane. It's a tourist trap.
Don't do it. So I found I did a little
intel opposition research and I went down some taco deep
state rabbitos. There's like a whole deep state network of
taco shops. So I was on a rampage. I'm like,
(15:37):
I got to find a new taco shop, and I did,
and I went there on the day that I slept
all day. They have three dollars crunchy tacos. Now, there
is a catch. The catch is it's on the wrong
side of the tracks. If you will, okay, it's not
(16:01):
the greatest neighborhood. As long as you are there during
the day, you're fine. However, I had woken up. There's
only thirty minutes a daylight. It's more than a thirty
minute drive with traffic. You don't want to be there
after dark because there's a lot of you know, thugs
and losers and criminals or whatever. They'll kick you in
the teeth so who wants it? But I made the sacrifice.
I risked my life for crunchy tacos. I did, and
(16:24):
I dragged my wife with me. We went there and
nothing happened. Nothing happened. We got there just as the
sun sun was setting, and I got my tacos Dorado's
and a plate of chips, and was smiling from ear
to ear. I the spice of life, enjoying life, and
(16:45):
just wonderful. App solutely wonderful. So that's how I spent
last Friday. And then I watched Benny Versus the Penny,
and then I watched some of the nonsense going on
in college football. Were a couple of games, as I remember,
on Friday. The baseball playoffs did not start until Saturday
(17:06):
last week, so there was no baseball on Friday. Now
turning the page, Mayor Aura, A couple of you sent
me this and we didn't talk about it on the
Overnight Show, the original Recipe Overnight Show. So I thought, well,
it's a fifth hour podcast, and I saw it. I
didn't mention it. That's a third rail all my own.
(17:27):
That's the third rail. What are you doing? It's kind
of a political storyvice not a political story. But it is,
but it's not because it's kind of a goofy story.
So beast mode marsha On Lynch. You know who that is, right,
the old NFL player, Marshawn Lynch. I'm ay doon't get fined.
So he showed up to the Super Bowl media day
and said all the ridiculous stuff that he said. He's
(17:47):
a bit of a space cadet and so he played
in the NFL for a long time, a bunch of
teams known as the Seattle Sehawk. And he has now
hinted and you have sent me the story. I didn't
see that you sent it to me. He's on the
political blogs the blogosphere that Marshawn Lynch is thinking about
running for political office. He is considering becoming the mayor
(18:12):
of Oakland. Say what huh? What kind of back room
politics is this going to be? Yeah? He said on
his Pledgling podcast that he co hosted a co host
with the agent that he has and the worst governor
in America, the incompetent Gavin Newsom. So he's on that
(18:35):
with him, and he said it might be a possibility.
Now might is a weasel word. I might make ten
million dollars this year. I'm not, but I might so.
According to this, Marshawn Lynch is considering it, and he
was being encouraged by the two hacks that he does
(18:56):
his podcast with to do it. You might remember Marshawn
when he was a cow golden Bear. He was spinning
in the golf cart around, driving around the field and
all that. And anyway, apparently, and I don't follow Oakland politics,
but if you're an Oaklander, you know that the mayor
of that city is in the middle of a scandal
(19:18):
right up to their chinny chin chin and the city
is a great example of how you let criminals take
over your town. It's so bad. How bad is it?
As I understand it, the FBI raided the mayor's home,
(19:39):
and there was an intervention of state law enforcement and
a bunch of political muckety MUCKs that were sent by
the state of California. You imagine if the State of
California that doesn't care about criminals anywhere, they'll just allow
you to steal whatever you want, as long as under
one thousand dollars, tack whatever you want. Oakland has has
(20:01):
lost all their pro sports. The A's are now gone,
and so the mayor is likely going to be kicked
out right, and that's it. See you later. There's gonna
be an opening for the mayor and Marshawn's flirting, he said.
He said it would be like that Chris Rock directed
(20:24):
movie Head of State, the late Bernie Mack bought. Bernie
was a funny man. Bernie Mack died way too soon,
but Bernie Mack was in there, and Marshawn said it
would be like that. He'd be slapping the shit out
of everybody and all that. Now, a couple of things,
all right, The question is what do you make of
Marshawn Lynch running for the mayor's office in Oakland? So
(20:48):
I got the big P and spending golly, and we'll
combine all of these things together and we're gonna make
a cushy number number on all right. So, first thing, a,
Marshawn Lynch is not actually going to run for political office.
(21:09):
Let's get that out of the way, okay. And just
because he's trying to get that the capital P P
word publicity, it's a publicity stunt for his fledging the podcast.
I believe that to be true. I see no evidence
at all that Marshawn is going to run for office. Now,
there are a couple of reasons for that. The first
(21:31):
one is he's rich, and typically if you're rich, the
only reason you run for office is if you are
you're an attention wore. Marshan doesn't seem like that kind
of guy. I know that fame and celebrity and cloud
are contagious things. They're highly contagious, and it is a
(21:54):
communicable disease if you will spreading rapidly around society because
social media that said, I don't buy it. I don't
buy it. He's also got a fair amount of baggage,
not that that would stop you in twenty twenty four
to run or twenty twenty five for political office. And
then and b Marshawan, here's the catch twenty two because
(22:18):
I don't think he's gonna run. I think this is
just he's just talking out of his tooks. Is badonka
dounk and all that. But the other part of it
is if he were serious, and again I do not
think he is serious. I think this is just a
sideshow attraction. Hey put my name out there, and it
looks like based on what you guys have sent me
that the bloggisphere the political world is like, oh, man
(22:42):
Marshan could enter this and man a lah. Now if
he does actually enter, he would win. He would absolutely
become the mayor of Oakland. He would he two reasons.
He would run as a Democrat in a state that
is a one party state, and he's famous and that
(23:04):
whole celebrity thing. Marshawn, in a very odd way, has
this spngali effect. At least he did as a player.
Now I don't listen to his podcast. I have no
interest in hearing his podcast. I want nothing to do anything.
Gavin Newsom is a part of I want nothing to
(23:24):
do it. So I will not listen to that at all.
But he would win, Marshawn would win and all that.
So we'll see what happens. Foody fun, reay for food,
he fun, hooray for food he Fun. I know that's
the song that our guy, our guy in Fullerton, Bergdog loves.
(23:50):
He actually listens to that fun fact Bergdog listens to
that when he's with his personal trainer and he does
jumping Jack's while eating donut holes. Wow, it's really cool.
Not as cool as when Alf the alien Opiner jumps
rope with cats. He uses cats as the jump rope.
(24:12):
That's even more impressive. But these guys are talented. I'm
telling you the p ones, and they know what they're doing.
So Fruity Fun Pizza Hut has launched a new item,
boneless big boneless wings. It's a bundle of big bonus wings. Now,
boneless wings are not wings, but I would prefer them.
(24:38):
Here's what you get. Each big boneless wing includes sixteen
They include sixteen, but each of them has let's see
what you get here. Bonus wings. Susists of one hundred
percent all white meat chicken boneus wings, breaded and fried,
golden brown and crisp. So prices may vary, but fifteen
(24:59):
ninety nine of these giant chunks of chicken. They look
they look good. I don't know that that's worth the
sixteen ninety n but it's like a dollar a piece
of chickens, so I guess that's in modern times, that's
not outrageous. These are available participating pizza at restaurants Krispy
(25:21):
Kreme offering free original glazed donuts to anyone including you
and I who can present a McDonald's receipt dated between
the yesterday, the tenth, and then the fourteenth, so today's
the eleven, so till Monday. So if you want a
free glazed donut and you're already going to McDonald's, do
(25:44):
you have to buy something from Krispy Kream? I don't
see the fine print here. You might have to buy something,
but otherwise just show up say I want my donut,
and they get very pissed when you only get one donut.
They assume you're going to buy something else, a cup
of coffee or something else. So if you go own
to Krispy Kreme and you just get one donut and
it's free, that's not the point of the bit. That's
(26:05):
not the point Popeyes. Popeyes has introduced a new ghost
pepper chicken sandwich, which, looking at this appears to be
the same exact chicken sandwich with a spice on top
of it. Seven eleven. I have a buddy of mine
who has a regular job and he loves getting food
at seven eleven. Yeah, he's like a real man's man,
(26:28):
drives a truck and he goes in there and loves
loves the slurpies and all the all the stuff he's
got there, the hot dogs, all that God must have
an iron stomach. But seven eleven now welcoming in the
new everything bagel, breakfast sandwich, chicken and waffle roller, stuffed
(26:49):
pepperoni pizza, and more part of their fall lineup. They
all fall lineup at seven eleven. It's like it's like
a TV channel back in the day, NBC or CBS
or ABC will be like, here's our fall lineup of
TV shows. Now it's seven to eleven with a chicken
and waffles roller. Now, Taco Bell is bringing back the
(27:13):
double decker tacos that actually started yesterday, so they're back.
And in Baltimore Shout Out Sports with Coleman, Popeyes is
testing the new chicken Dippers. I might have to send
my guy boots on the ground Sports with Coleman to
a Popeyes to test those out. And Burger King testing
(27:34):
a new item. Burger King testing a new item in
New Zealand, a fried apple bites. Now that sounds good
to me. Fried apple bites a new item there, it
does look pretty good. I'm not gonna lie. And the
way this works, remember this international food crap if people
like it in New Zealand and some of these other
(27:56):
countries Eventually it works its way here to the ship
where we live. Unless you're listening outside of America, but
here in the US, it'll come here because we buy
more fast food than anyone we love. We love our
fast food. Time now for the phrase of the word
in the Phrase of the week today is go bananas.
(28:20):
You're going bananas? What are you doing? Going banans? Well,
this is actually an interesting one as opposed to the
ones that aren't interesting. I thought this was kind of cool.
And this was sent in by I think listener is it?
Fred starts with an F in Texas said this he
wanted to know he's too lazy and wanted to know
about bananas. Go bananas, Go bananas is a superstition that
(28:46):
goes back to the shipping world of the seventeen hundreds,
the Caribbean shipping lines, and the superstition is that bananas
are bad luck on boats, and it goes all the
way back to the seventeen hundreds. There's a lot of
theories as to why bananas are considered bad juju, but
(29:09):
according to popular opinion, it's because bananas spoil quickly, and
on those merchant ships in the Caribbean, they had to
sail very fast to get to the port, because if
they didn't make it in time, the bananas would be
bad and it's a problem. And that made it difficult
for fishermen to catch fish because they were so worried
(29:31):
about the bananas. Bananas also caused I didn't know this,
but they caused other fruits to spoil. There's some kind
of gas that bananas release that causes other fruits to
ripen faster. Who knew, Yeah, who knew? Now? In that
same vein bananas also the superstition they were found on shipwrecks,
(29:53):
and so the theory. People weren't very bright back then,
and the theory was that they'd come across a shipwreck
and they always find bananas floating. Cases of banana would
be floating on top of the water. And the maritime
sailors of that seventeen hundreds blamed the bananas for the
boat sinking. Put two and two together, Well, we found bananas,
(30:16):
they're floating, the ship is not toda. Also, bananas would
provide other venomous animals or little critters on the ship.
Spiders and snakes would hide in the cases of bananas,
and so they would transport venomous spiders and snakes would
(30:37):
hide in the boxes of bananas, and then while the
ship was sailing, or they were eating or they were
trying to sleep, they'd have these venomous spiders and snakes
crawling around the boat. And they were taking them to
other parts of the world, and even to this day.
And if you're in the boating world, let me know.
(30:57):
But some boaters still avoid bringing bananas on board, even
have signs posted to say, hey, you probably shouldn't do that,
probably shouldn't put bananas, and we don't want your vananza.
All right, we'll get out on that. Have a wonderful,
wonderful weekend, wonderful Friday. Today, I'll be watching that Dodger
Padre game. I may even do an ass been I'll
(31:17):
tell you what. If the Dodgers end up winning, maybe
it looks good. I might do an ass bend either
today right after the game or sometime on Saturday. Haven't decided,
but I'll just let you know. Keep you in the loop,
de loop. So that's a possibility if I'm in a
good mood, and we'll see what happens and try not
to go bananas. Have a wonderful wonderful rest of your Friday.
(31:41):
Thank you, don't forget Benny Versus the Penny in your
face for us average Joe's. You can watch that. I
know Al's done a great job. Several of the other
guys watching it a ton so a masshole Mickey as well.
It's just awesome. Thank you all for the photos and
keep them coming in. Love it, love it, love it,
Benny versus the Penny all night, tonight, all day Saturday,
(32:04):
and then on Sunday morning as well. Anyway, have a
great day. We'll talk to you next time later. Skater.
Is that how you do it? Danny asta pasta wrong? Yeah,
that's the ticket. How do you like them apples? You fired?
Kubbooms.
Speaker 2 (00:02):
If you thought four hours a day, twelve hundred minutes
a week was enough, think again. He's the last remnants
of the old Republic, a soul fashion of fairness. He
treats crackheads in the ghetto gutter the same as the
rich pill poppers in the penthouse.
Speaker 1 (00:18):
Wow.
Speaker 2 (00:18):
It's a clearinghouse of hot takes. Break free for something special.
The Fifth Hour with Ben Maller starts right now.
Speaker 1 (00:29):
It the air everywhere. The Fifth Hour with me Ben
Mahler and Danny G Radio hanging out with you all
weekend as we talk in circles. It's a podcast. It's
so simple. This is not the original recipe Ben Mahler
show that you hear overnight. No, no, no, this is
(00:50):
the Extra Crispy, Extra Spicy Fifth Hour Podcast. As we
are here every Friday, Saturday and Sunday to provide you
with weekend entertainment in the audio Sweatshop. Now, Danny G
is not with me yet again here on Friday. He'll
be back for these Saturday and Sunday podcasts as we
(01:12):
attempt to kick butt. Now, normally we have a certain routine.
If you've listened to this podcast, you know that We
typically start out by looking at some dopey holidays that
are taking place. Now we've been doing this for many,
many months, and today would be the worst day that
I can remember for cheeseball holidays. I was trying, I
(01:36):
was just trying to find something that seemed fun, something
that seemed interesting, and there's just nothing there. Like the
one that stood out is National Sausage Pizza Day. Does
sausage pizza need its own day? Isn't there just a
there's a pizza Day and that should be fine, but
there's a sausage Pizza Day, and then there's like a
(01:56):
bunch of other stuff just aren't any good that are
just kind of dumb. So bad day for holidays. But
the show must go on. The show must go on
for us peasants, the common man, the hoi POLOI, the
rank and file. Everyone to say it. And on this podcast,
(02:17):
the Friday edition, the eleventh of October, we've got does
anyone have a watch? Mayor Aura? Foody fun and the
phrase of the week. The phrase of the week, But
as always we start with the shameless promotion for the
(02:38):
number one TV show that you're gonna watch this weekend,
and it still amazes me that my name is on it.
It is Benny versus the Penny, and I am a
proud papa, if you will. Many of you have taken
time out and sent me photographs of you watching the
(03:00):
show and not only watching it at home, and those
are great. Those are wonderful. Are our friend in the
Minneapolis area, she's got a nice cabin, just just awesome,
and some of the other photos. But people have been
sending me photos from restaurants, which is awesome. One guy
(03:22):
in New Hampshire was at a sports bar, which I
didn't even know they had sports bars in New Hampshire.
It's not very big. I know they have a nice
little Portsmouth is a nice little tourist town, but I
haven't really sport New Hampshire too much. But anyway, the
guy sent me a photo at some sports bars said yeah,
they have it on there. You're on the tv there
in the sports bar. I said, well, that's pretty cool,
(03:43):
so thank you for that. My email, you neither send
it to benmalorshow at gmail dot com or the Fifth
Hour podcast email. We have our own email, which is
probably better that way because that's what I use for
the podcast when I'm getting ready for the podcast. I
normally go going through the email and it's kind of
my routine. So if you want to send something in
(04:04):
real fifth hour at gmail dot com and it is
available starting today all over the place. Benny Versus the Penny,
the first episode of Benny Versus the Penny will air
at six pm today Boston, NBC Sports Boston, right after
the simulcast of Felger and Maz It ends at six
(04:26):
and then our show begins handicapping as I analyze all
the big games and we go head to head against
the Penny. Now, I have not seen the episode this
weekend's episode. We were doing it yesterday at Universal Studios.
We were taping it and it was a fun, fun
(04:47):
show to tape. I'm not sure what the final product
is going to be. I'm hoping there is a Looney
blooper that made the show. There was a debate in
the control room among the the boys that work on
the show. Vinnie and John I think was part of that,
and a couple of the other big guys there that
(05:07):
are involved in trying to put together and then we
do a couple of takes and then normally we try
to just do one take but typically we end up
having to do a couple and so we don't know
what you don't know, so we'll find out. I will
find out with you. And on NBC Sports Boston, the
show will air a bunch. Not only is it air
at six o'clock, but also at eight thirty. There's another
(05:27):
showing at nine to thirty. So three showings of Benny
Versus the Penny in Boston tonight, and that's the flagship
of the show because it's produced out of NBC Sports Boston,
but it is also on in many many other locations,
some I don't even know about. It's on in Philadelphia,
(05:50):
Home of the Fight in Phills. That'll be at six
point thirty if you're in Philly on NBC Sports Philadelphia
six thirty tonight, right after Birds Huddle with Barrett Brooks
and Birds Huddle. I think I know what that's about
being in Philadelphia. But anyway, that's available Benny Versus the
Penny six thirty in Philadelphia. Check your local TV listings
(06:14):
for the time in your area. And if you don't
have an NBC Sports regional cable channel or affiliate near you,
I know we're on in La on the Laker station,
for example, which is partnered with NBC but not a
technical NBC station, not run not operated by NBC, so
there is that. And also on Peacock streaming nationally, you
(06:38):
can always get your hands on Benny versus the Penny
every single moment, all weekend long, starting later today. It
might not be up right now if you're listening early.
This podcast goes up relatively early in the day. I'm
not even really sure exactly when the podcast or the
TV show rather goes on Peacock, but it's available once
(07:01):
it goes up, usually late afternoon, sometimes early evening on Friday,
which is today, and then it'll be all Saturday and
then you can watch it. And I don't think old
episodes are available, so you really have to watch it
when the newest episode is available. So with that as
the backdrop, let's go back to last Friday. You might
(07:25):
remember I was still recovering from a tongue injury. This
job is not that easy. I had bitten my tongue,
which is not as bad as burning your tongue, but
in the same family. So I'd bitten my tongue the
left side of my tongue, and it was causing me
a whole lot of problems. I was able to do
(07:47):
the show, but it was very uncomfortable. It wasn't fun.
It's still not all the way back to where it
needs to be because I'm still talking a lot, and
so it's getting better. I'm almost where I want to be,
but still off a little bit little whacky, a little bit,
a little bit of whacking. And it's going on. But
my schedule, I have first world problems. My schedule is
(08:10):
one where I'm very very busy for several days during
the week. Wednesday, Thursday, and Friday are not not good
good days. Now they are good days because I love
what I do and I like my job, and so
it's fun. But I am burning the midnight oil and
(08:34):
then some. And I'm not doing it at lavish parties,
these extravagant upscale shin digs. No, I'm not doing it
at private meetings. I am doing it with my face
either buried into a microphone or buried into my laptop
as I try to put together the handicapping for the
(08:56):
weekend's NFL games. And so that's my routine, and it's
the malor O rama. And really it starts on Tuesday,
you know, I wait for the Monday game day. And
that's something new that I did last year. I'd start
doing it on Monday, and I was like, I need
to get the final numbers. So I wait till the
Monday night games are over, and then I see whether
(09:18):
or not my picks collapsed or not, and which games
laid an egg and where I whiffed and all that,
and then try to figure it out. But I typically
wait till Tuesday. Right after the show on Tuesday morning,
I go right to it and I spend a good
amount of time handicapping on Tuesday. And then Wednesday's the
(09:38):
big big day. You start getting injury reports, which is
a big part of this. Who's playing, who's not playing,
and so that's that's a big part of it. But
I'm up a lot. I don't get a lot of sleep.
And then Thursday we do the show and we record
the TV show and then I've got to deal with
rush hour traffic from Universal Studio, and I have to
(10:01):
get ready for the other show, the radio show, the
live show, and so I end up getting maybe two
to three hours maybe. Now usually I'm a four to
five hour sleep guy. So you say, well, that's not
that big a deal. You're only getting a little bit less.
But apparently anything under four problematic, right, I'm on vapors.
(10:22):
I am on absolute vapors by that point. And so
what ended up happening is last Friday, after I recorded
the podcast early Friday morning, I then send it to Danny,
who is the producer of the podcast as well as
my right hand man, and then Danny futses around with
(10:45):
it and makes it sound pretty and makes it sound
like I know what I'm doing, and then we put
that up and then that's it. I'm done for the day,
and so I go And this day I was like,
I want to kind of relax and meditate, so I'm
gonna go the bathtub. So I went to the bathtub,
the Mallard tub. I took about a twenty five minute
bath with that bubble soap. Everyone was great, loved it.
(11:09):
My right hand was getting a workout. Don't do that
very often. Don't do it very often. And I just
needed to decompress from the week, and my mind was
spinning and all that. You know what it's like, right,
We've all been there, whether you have a job like
mine or you have a different job, but we've all
got stresses in our lives. So I took a sleeping
pill the only way I will get more than four
(11:30):
hours sleeping. Now keep in mind, I probably didn't need
one because I was so tired from what had happened
the last couple of days. But I was like, listen,
I want to make sure I get a deep sleep,
and so I'm going to take this this Kirkland brand
sleep aid. So I did, and I went to bed
way after the sun came up, and I woke up,
(11:51):
and I wonder if you've ever had this happen. It's
happened to me a few times, especially doing overnights, and
chances are you probably do work overnight. Most of the
people that listen work overnight, although we have people that
graduated that are in good spirits because they work the
dread to day shift. But you go to bed after
the sun comes up, and you wake up discombobulated, you
(12:17):
know what I'm saying, Like you you're so zonked out,
and then you wake up, and you know there's a
normal period of time when you wake up you just
kind of gotta get going. I'm typically get out of
the bed quick, guy, get it over with guy. That's
me because once I'm up, I'm up, I don't I
don't go back to sleep. I don't. Once in a
(12:37):
blue moon, I'll go back to sleep, and I don't
sleep with a sound sleep. So I'm wake up and
I'm discombobulated as groggy feeling. It's kind of like the
Twilight Zone. It's like the Twilight Zone. I'm not really
sure if I'm alive, if somehow I'm dead and I'm
(13:00):
I'm in a parallel dimension. I mean, I'm not exactly sure.
Maybe I'm in the outskirts of reality picture if you
will a world, or you wake up and you're not
sure what time it is or where you are exactly.
You're confused, and I'm thinking, does anyone have a watch? Well,
(13:24):
who uses watches? I have a watch. I have an
Apple Watch. I don't have a Walker Bueller one hundred
thousand dollar watch. But I ended up grabbing my phone
and eventually I realized that I had slept through almost
all of the daylight hours. My alarm clock went off,
(13:44):
and I kept sleeping. I was not tired, and I
awoke with about thirty minutes of sunlight and the sun
was starting to go down. It was starting to go down.
So it's that bizarro world situation. You're like, oh man,
(14:06):
I am literally living in the darkness, right. You're traveling
through another dimension, a dimension not only of sight and sound,
but of mind, a journey into a wondrous land whose
boundaries are that of imagination. The sign posts up ahead
your next stop the twilight Zone.
Speaker 2 (14:27):
Do do do Do Do Do Do Do Do Do
Do Do Do Do Do do do do do doo.
Speaker 1 (14:31):
So I was like, who goofed? I've got to know?
And then I'm like, this is I mean, I didn't
plan on sleeping that long. I mean I only get
like a day and a half off. I want to
enjoy my time, and I got the podcast to do
still over the weedend anyway, so I woke up, me
and the wife. We quickly drove to my favorite taco
place now my I love Tacos delrado is what it's
(14:54):
called tacos dorato, which is crunchy tacos. I used to
go to Tito's Tacos in La Here. I love Tito's Tacos.
I was a loyal Tito's Tacos customer for over twenty years,
and I will not go back because I say I
will not go back unless somebody drags me there because
it's too expensive. It's ridiculous. The same thing that I
(15:17):
got for like two dollars or a dollar fifty is
now like six dollars. It's insane. It's a tourist trap.
Don't do it. So I found I did a little
intel opposition research and I went down some taco deep
state rabbitos. There's like a whole deep state network of
taco shops. So I was on a rampage. I'm like,
(15:37):
I got to find a new taco shop, and I did,
and I went there on the day that I slept
all day. They have three dollars crunchy tacos. Now, there
is a catch. The catch is it's on the wrong
side of the tracks. If you will, okay, it's not
(16:01):
the greatest neighborhood. As long as you are there during
the day, you're fine. However, I had woken up. There's
only thirty minutes a daylight. It's more than a thirty
minute drive with traffic. You don't want to be there
after dark because there's a lot of you know, thugs
and losers and criminals or whatever. They'll kick you in
the teeth so who wants it? But I made the sacrifice.
I risked my life for crunchy tacos. I did, and
(16:24):
I dragged my wife with me. We went there and
nothing happened. Nothing happened. We got there just as the
sun sun was setting, and I got my tacos Dorado's
and a plate of chips, and was smiling from ear
to ear. I the spice of life, enjoying life, and
(16:45):
just wonderful. App solutely wonderful. So that's how I spent
last Friday. And then I watched Benny Versus the Penny,
and then I watched some of the nonsense going on
in college football. Were a couple of games, as I remember,
on Friday. The baseball playoffs did not start until Saturday
(17:06):
last week, so there was no baseball on Friday. Now
turning the page, Mayor Aura, A couple of you sent
me this and we didn't talk about it on the
Overnight Show, the original Recipe Overnight Show. So I thought, well,
it's a fifth hour podcast, and I saw it. I
didn't mention it. That's a third rail all my own.
(17:27):
That's the third rail. What are you doing? It's kind
of a political storyvice not a political story. But it is,
but it's not because it's kind of a goofy story.
So beast mode marsha On Lynch. You know who that is, right,
the old NFL player, Marshawn Lynch. I'm ay doon't get fined.
So he showed up to the Super Bowl media day
and said all the ridiculous stuff that he said. He's
(17:47):
a bit of a space cadet and so he played
in the NFL for a long time, a bunch of
teams known as the Seattle Sehawk. And he has now
hinted and you have sent me the story. I didn't
see that you sent it to me. He's on the
political blogs the blogosphere that Marshawn Lynch is thinking about
running for political office. He is considering becoming the mayor
(18:12):
of Oakland. Say what huh? What kind of back room
politics is this going to be? Yeah? He said on
his Pledgling podcast that he co hosted a co host
with the agent that he has and the worst governor
in America, the incompetent Gavin Newsom. So he's on that
(18:35):
with him, and he said it might be a possibility.
Now might is a weasel word. I might make ten
million dollars this year. I'm not, but I might so.
According to this, Marshawn Lynch is considering it, and he
was being encouraged by the two hacks that he does
(18:56):
his podcast with to do it. You might remember Marshawn
when he was a cow golden Bear. He was spinning
in the golf cart around, driving around the field and
all that. And anyway, apparently, and I don't follow Oakland politics,
but if you're an Oaklander, you know that the mayor
of that city is in the middle of a scandal
(19:18):
right up to their chinny chin chin and the city
is a great example of how you let criminals take
over your town. It's so bad. How bad is it?
As I understand it, the FBI raided the mayor's home,
(19:39):
and there was an intervention of state law enforcement and
a bunch of political muckety MUCKs that were sent by
the state of California. You imagine if the State of
California that doesn't care about criminals anywhere, they'll just allow
you to steal whatever you want, as long as under
one thousand dollars, tack whatever you want. Oakland has has
(20:01):
lost all their pro sports. The A's are now gone,
and so the mayor is likely going to be kicked
out right, and that's it. See you later. There's gonna
be an opening for the mayor and Marshawn's flirting, he said.
He said it would be like that Chris Rock directed
(20:24):
movie Head of State, the late Bernie Mack bought. Bernie
was a funny man. Bernie Mack died way too soon,
but Bernie Mack was in there, and Marshawn said it
would be like that. He'd be slapping the shit out
of everybody and all that. Now, a couple of things,
all right, The question is what do you make of
Marshawn Lynch running for the mayor's office in Oakland? So
(20:48):
I got the big P and spending golly, and we'll
combine all of these things together and we're gonna make
a cushy number number on all right. So, first thing, a,
Marshawn Lynch is not actually going to run for political office.
(21:09):
Let's get that out of the way, okay. And just
because he's trying to get that the capital P P
word publicity, it's a publicity stunt for his fledging the podcast.
I believe that to be true. I see no evidence
at all that Marshawn is going to run for office. Now,
there are a couple of reasons for that. The first
(21:31):
one is he's rich, and typically if you're rich, the
only reason you run for office is if you are
you're an attention wore. Marshan doesn't seem like that kind
of guy. I know that fame and celebrity and cloud
are contagious things. They're highly contagious, and it is a
(21:54):
communicable disease if you will spreading rapidly around society because
social media that said, I don't buy it. I don't
buy it. He's also got a fair amount of baggage,
not that that would stop you in twenty twenty four
to run or twenty twenty five for political office. And
then and b Marshawan, here's the catch twenty two because
(22:18):
I don't think he's gonna run. I think this is
just he's just talking out of his tooks. Is badonka
dounk and all that. But the other part of it
is if he were serious, and again I do not
think he is serious. I think this is just a
sideshow attraction. Hey put my name out there, and it
looks like based on what you guys have sent me
that the bloggisphere the political world is like, oh, man
(22:42):
Marshan could enter this and man a lah. Now if
he does actually enter, he would win. He would absolutely
become the mayor of Oakland. He would he two reasons.
He would run as a Democrat in a state that
is a one party state, and he's famous and that
(23:04):
whole celebrity thing. Marshawn, in a very odd way, has
this spngali effect. At least he did as a player.
Now I don't listen to his podcast. I have no
interest in hearing his podcast. I want nothing to do anything.
Gavin Newsom is a part of I want nothing to
(23:24):
do it. So I will not listen to that at all.
But he would win, Marshawn would win and all that.
So we'll see what happens. Foody fun, reay for food,
he fun, hooray for food he Fun. I know that's
the song that our guy, our guy in Fullerton, Bergdog loves.
(23:50):
He actually listens to that fun fact Bergdog listens to
that when he's with his personal trainer and he does
jumping Jack's while eating donut holes. Wow, it's really cool.
Not as cool as when Alf the alien Opiner jumps
rope with cats. He uses cats as the jump rope.
(24:12):
That's even more impressive. But these guys are talented. I'm
telling you the p ones, and they know what they're doing.
So Fruity Fun Pizza Hut has launched a new item,
boneless big boneless wings. It's a bundle of big bonus wings. Now,
boneless wings are not wings, but I would prefer them.
(24:38):
Here's what you get. Each big boneless wing includes sixteen
They include sixteen, but each of them has let's see
what you get here. Bonus wings. Susists of one hundred
percent all white meat chicken boneus wings, breaded and fried,
golden brown and crisp. So prices may vary, but fifteen
(24:59):
ninety nine of these giant chunks of chicken. They look
they look good. I don't know that that's worth the
sixteen ninety n but it's like a dollar a piece
of chickens, so I guess that's in modern times, that's
not outrageous. These are available participating pizza at restaurants Krispy
(25:21):
Kreme offering free original glazed donuts to anyone including you
and I who can present a McDonald's receipt dated between
the yesterday, the tenth, and then the fourteenth, so today's
the eleven, so till Monday. So if you want a
free glazed donut and you're already going to McDonald's, do
(25:44):
you have to buy something from Krispy Kream? I don't
see the fine print here. You might have to buy something,
but otherwise just show up say I want my donut,
and they get very pissed when you only get one donut.
They assume you're going to buy something else, a cup
of coffee or something else. So if you go own
to Krispy Kreme and you just get one donut and
it's free, that's not the point of the bit. That's
(26:05):
not the point Popeyes. Popeyes has introduced a new ghost
pepper chicken sandwich, which, looking at this appears to be
the same exact chicken sandwich with a spice on top
of it. Seven eleven. I have a buddy of mine
who has a regular job and he loves getting food
at seven eleven. Yeah, he's like a real man's man,
(26:28):
drives a truck and he goes in there and loves
loves the slurpies and all the all the stuff he's
got there, the hot dogs, all that God must have
an iron stomach. But seven eleven now welcoming in the
new everything bagel, breakfast sandwich, chicken and waffle roller, stuffed
(26:49):
pepperoni pizza, and more part of their fall lineup. They
all fall lineup at seven eleven. It's like it's like
a TV channel back in the day, NBC or CBS
or ABC will be like, here's our fall lineup of
TV shows. Now it's seven to eleven with a chicken
and waffles roller. Now, Taco Bell is bringing back the
(27:13):
double decker tacos that actually started yesterday, so they're back.
And in Baltimore Shout Out Sports with Coleman, Popeyes is
testing the new chicken Dippers. I might have to send
my guy boots on the ground Sports with Coleman to
a Popeyes to test those out. And Burger King testing
(27:34):
a new item. Burger King testing a new item in
New Zealand, a fried apple bites. Now that sounds good
to me. Fried apple bites a new item there, it
does look pretty good. I'm not gonna lie. And the
way this works, remember this international food crap if people
like it in New Zealand and some of these other
(27:56):
countries Eventually it works its way here to the ship
where we live. Unless you're listening outside of America, but
here in the US, it'll come here because we buy
more fast food than anyone we love. We love our
fast food. Time now for the phrase of the word
in the Phrase of the week today is go bananas.
(28:20):
You're going bananas? What are you doing? Going banans? Well,
this is actually an interesting one as opposed to the
ones that aren't interesting. I thought this was kind of cool.
And this was sent in by I think listener is it?
Fred starts with an F in Texas said this he
wanted to know he's too lazy and wanted to know
about bananas. Go bananas, Go bananas is a superstition that
(28:46):
goes back to the shipping world of the seventeen hundreds,
the Caribbean shipping lines, and the superstition is that bananas
are bad luck on boats, and it goes all the
way back to the seventeen hundreds. There's a lot of
theories as to why bananas are considered bad juju, but
(29:09):
according to popular opinion, it's because bananas spoil quickly, and
on those merchant ships in the Caribbean, they had to
sail very fast to get to the port, because if
they didn't make it in time, the bananas would be
bad and it's a problem. And that made it difficult
for fishermen to catch fish because they were so worried
(29:31):
about the bananas. Bananas also caused I didn't know this,
but they caused other fruits to spoil. There's some kind
of gas that bananas release that causes other fruits to
ripen faster. Who knew, Yeah, who knew? Now? In that
same vein bananas also the superstition they were found on shipwrecks,
(29:53):
and so the theory. People weren't very bright back then,
and the theory was that they'd come across a shipwreck
and they always find bananas floating. Cases of banana would
be floating on top of the water. And the maritime
sailors of that seventeen hundreds blamed the bananas for the
boat sinking. Put two and two together, Well, we found bananas,
(30:16):
they're floating, the ship is not toda. Also, bananas would
provide other venomous animals or little critters on the ship.
Spiders and snakes would hide in the cases of bananas,
and so they would transport venomous spiders and snakes would
(30:37):
hide in the boxes of bananas, and then while the
ship was sailing, or they were eating or they were
trying to sleep, they'd have these venomous spiders and snakes
crawling around the boat. And they were taking them to
other parts of the world, and even to this day.
And if you're in the boating world, let me know.
(30:57):
But some boaters still avoid bringing bananas on board, even
have signs posted to say, hey, you probably shouldn't do that,
probably shouldn't put bananas, and we don't want your vananza.
All right, we'll get out on that. Have a wonderful,
wonderful weekend, wonderful Friday. Today, I'll be watching that Dodger
Padre game. I may even do an ass been I'll
(31:17):
tell you what. If the Dodgers end up winning, maybe
it looks good. I might do an ass bend either
today right after the game or sometime on Saturday. Haven't decided,
but I'll just let you know. Keep you in the loop,
de loop. So that's a possibility if I'm in a
good mood, and we'll see what happens and try not
to go bananas. Have a wonderful wonderful rest of your Friday.
(31:41):
Thank you, don't forget Benny Versus the Penny in your
face for us average Joe's. You can watch that. I
know Al's done a great job. Several of the other
guys watching it a ton so a masshole Mickey as well.
It's just awesome. Thank you all for the photos and
keep them coming in. Love it, love it, love it,
Benny versus the Penny all night, tonight, all day Saturday,
(32:04):
and then on Sunday morning as well. Anyway, have a
great day. We'll talk to you next time later. Skater.
Is that how you do it? Danny asta pasta wrong? Yeah,
that's the ticket. How do you like them apples? You fired?
Host
Ben Maller
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