January 9, 2022 • 27 mins
Ben is back in the studio with Danny G. to have some fun with the mail bag, answering select P1 questions from the #MallerMilitia on this edition! Download, subscribe, and remember that sharing is caring (unless it's an STD.) Follow Ben on Twitter @BenMaller and listen to the original terrestrial radio edition of "Ben Maller Show," Monday-Friday on Fox Sports Radio, 2a-6a ET, 11p-3a PT!
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
Boom. If you thought four hours a day, minutes a
week was enough, think again. He's the last remnants of
the old republic, a sole fashion of fairness. He treats
crackheads in the ghetto cutter the same as the rich
pill poppers in the penthouse. The clearing House of hot
takes break free for something special. The Fifth Hour with
(00:23):
Ben Maller starts right now in the air everywhere a
Sunday Sunday edition of The Fifth Hour with Ben Maller
and Day and h G Radio because hey, the overnight
show during the week not enough bonus bonus covers. I
(00:44):
think this is the eighth day of a week actually
for the show on Sunday and the last NFL regular
season Sunday Nanny. Now most people seem to listen to
this in the morning, but I mean there are people
that go back and listen later. But this is it.
This is the playoffs start next week and you you
(01:04):
have a raided playoff game today the night the Raiders
and the and the Chargers. So that's right, flex to
the Sunday night football game on NBC. Cannot wait for
the Raiders and Chargers. Man, I got screwed a couple
of years ago, I I was in Seattle and the
Seahawk forty Niner game that that year. It was it
(01:26):
was week I think it was Week seventeen, and it
got flexed to the Sunday night game and it was
like I couldn't get in, And when all I went
to Seattle and hung out outside the stadium, I was
banned from going to STA. Have you been to a
Raider game in Vegas yet? I have not been yet.
I was tempted to trade shifts with somebody at the
(01:49):
network and try to get out there for tonight's game.
I think that this is gonna be the first game
in Vegas where the home field advantage really makes a different.
The tickets are insane, though. I was talking to Eddie
about this during the week, and Eddie was, you know,
his wife's a big Charger fan, and they were thinking
about going, and they said, even on the second, you know,
(02:09):
the cheapest ticket they get get Yeah, it was like
six hundred bucks or something like that. I think it
might even be more than that, but it was ridiculous. Yeah.
It's funny because when you look at the schedule to
the right down the side of all the games, it
says tickets as low as and you're supposed to click
on if you want tickets, and teams said like twenty dollars.
(02:33):
One team where said forty eight dollars. Then you get
to Las Vegas and it said four hundred and eight
dollars as low as four hundred and eight dollars. Yeah,
we probably talked about this in the past on the
terrestrial radio show what is the most you would spend
on an NFL ticket? Yeah, we've talked about this recently
(02:55):
on the air. Um, you're right at Fox Sports Radio Network.
This has come up couple of times. And I think
that I said six hundred for me, like six hundred
dollars because I could see paying twelve hundred for a
pair of a really really crucial important playoff game. Maybe
if that gets you into a Super Bowl. I cannot
(03:17):
see paying more your rent or mortgage though on tickets. Yeah,
that's that's a tough one. I have. Roberto, I remember
bought a ticket to the seen World Series, the Dodgers game,
I think it was Game two, and I believe he's
still paying it off right now. And and that was
(03:37):
of course the cheating as strows. He used Klarna where
they let him pay monthly. Oh my god, what a nightmare. Anyway,
let's get to the mail bag. What do you say?
Here we go right now, let's do it. Big tip
(03:59):
of the microphone to our buddy Ohio Owl who made
that song in a brilliant rendition, because we're still playing
it and we'll probably play it for a long time
to come, but thanks to Ohio Aw. So these are
actual letters send in via email or posted on the
show facebook page, which is Ben mall or show. That's
(04:21):
the Facebook And every Tuesday I post on the Facebook page,
usually in the morning, but by by the afternoon. Normally
I post I say, hey, help us out. We need
some questions. And we have a very good, loyal group
of big fans. I'd love to get some new people
(04:44):
involved and to mix it up and get some new voices.
There's no pressure. Maybe you only want to ask a
question one time, UM, and that's fine, but you know
it's great. I really, I really appreciate the people that
take time out, shake things up and send questions in.
So the first one uh and you can also email
(05:05):
the questions by the way, Real fifth hour at gmail
dot com. First once from Jennifer and Richmond, Virginia. She says,
great to have your back. Sorry to hear you weren't
feeling well. My question this week is did you know
the most recent episode of Curb Your Enthusiasm was the
(05:26):
season finale? She says, I had no idea until days after.
I don't have cable. I use a quote secret unquote
streaming service, so I had no clue. I thought there
would be at least two more episodes. Uh, yeah, I
I was aware. Um My brother in law works on
(05:50):
Curb Your Enthusiasm as one of the crew guys, and
so he told stories. I actually watched, and hopefully you
can get this, Jennifer. You know Bob Einstein, better known
as Super Dave Osborne. You're around my age, don't you
remember Super Dave back? Right? The guy was a legend.
(06:11):
I love that he passed away. Wow back And they
made this really cool documentary on HBO. And if if
you're around our age and you remember super Dave, it
was awesome. You know, I was flashing back. I loved
him on The Letterman Show and all the dumb stupid
Uh he was doing a parody of Evil Kinevil. You know,
(06:35):
Super Dave, And they did a really nice retrospective on
his life in Hollywood, Bob Einstein and that's his legal name,
Bob Einstein, but better known as Super Dave of Osborne.
And that was pretty cool. And Jennifer also says that
you get the squirrel video that I said, and I
(06:57):
did not. Jennifer's in Richmond and Danny. She has trained
the squirrels in her backyard. She feeds them peanuts and
it was really it was really funny. I mean, this
one squirrel was trying to hoard all the all the peanuts.
It was I think Lenny was the name of the squirrel.
She named the squirrel Lenny, and it was It was
(07:19):
really good. Have you ever fed squirrels chip monks roasting
on an open fire? Exactly? Exactly. No. I know from
the time I was a little kid, I remember family
members always saying those things have brabies, don't get near it. Oh.
I know, of course they all sell that. But I
actually in central California, uh, near the Hearst Castle, which
(07:43):
I love that area. Uh. The I've told this story before,
but we were me and my wife will go there
quite a bit. You were trying to go once a year, Yeah,
San Simmon where they you can feed the seals, Yes,
I can't feed them, but you can watch them far
and lose their skin. And the lions is it lions seals?
(08:05):
Is that where they are anyway? Whatever they are, it's
it's it's right across from the Hearst Castle and the
beach there is pretty cool. By the way, have you
been to that beach right across from the hers Castle.
I have, Yeah, they have a pier. It's always foggy.
It's uh, it's pretty neat. Yeah, that area is nice.
If you ever get to California, go to San simeon
(08:25):
E Bay is not bad rock. They have the big
giant rock there. Beautiful. I love that area. It's unsullied
because William Howard Hurst or William Randolph Howard Hurst, right
he uh he when he died, his family just left
all the land, so all of central California. Yeah, you'll
(08:46):
imagine if somebody else owned that, there'd be big cities there.
And yeah, somebody from Oregon told me that that reminded
them their beaches. Like you said, it's not developed, Yeah, no,
it beautiful. It is uh wonderful. All right, what's next year?
Let's see alright, Kevin and Kansas says dear Ben and
(09:09):
Danny g thanks for soldiering through Ben with the voice issues.
Where you're You're welcome given. Uh. He says, you were
missed blah blah blah blah blah during the end of
the year. Were you able to be a normal person
on your sleep schedule for a while? Uh? If so,
how do you adjust back to your regular daytime, uh
(09:30):
sleep schedule? Well, it was pretty easy, Kevin, because I
couldn't go anywhere. As we talked about in the Saturday podcast,
when you have COVID, you are an ogre. Uh, you
have cooties. You are not allowed to be seen in
a polite society. And um so we just stayed home
(09:53):
and it was very boring and just stayed in bed
and watched TV, and I watched YouTube videos and and whatever,
played video games and uh pretty much just tried to
pass the time. Um So, but we did. I did
change my schedule a little bit. I went to bed
probably six five or six hours earlier than I normally do,
(10:16):
which is still late at night. But I can't completely
turn my schedule all the way around. I can't do
it because I'm just a night person. I'm just wired
that way. But you know, I don't know, did Danny
did you? You were working radio, so you couldn't really
change your schedule at all. Huh. Through Christmas and New
Year's Eve, I was working some shifts at the network,
(10:37):
so I had to be honest, a tight schedule. But
then once New Year's Eve happened and I stayed up,
I got home like at eleven thirty pm, so I
made it by a half hour to have a toast
with my TINDERRONI. But we stayed up. Like for us,
we laugh, we're like partying hard if we stay up
till eleven pm. We actually stayed until to thirty am. Wow,
(11:02):
my schedule has been thrown off ever since then. I've
been staying up way too late at night lately, so
I'm gonna have to flip it back around before school
starts Monday. So you have a few a few more
hours tomorrow, I should say, yeah, right, a few more
hours and then back to it. Alright, who is next here?
(11:24):
Let's see any meny miny mo come back. It's from
call that's right, Pierre from Springfield, the Massachusetts some of
the Pro Basketball Hall of Fame where you can see
muffin McGraw and tried uh and Pierce. Has been any
truth to the rumor that I Heart is in negotiations
(11:46):
to add Antonio Brown to the Fifth Hour Mixed Mimic,
two Pros and a Cup of Joe. Of course a
b doesn't have your athletic resume, but he'd just be
the third man in anyway, Does Danny g know that
Benning the Bopper once hit a ball that, if using
(12:07):
an aluminum bat, would have cleared the fence at Dodgers Well,
that is true, by the way, Danny. That is verified
Derrick call who is the CEO of the Arizona Diamondbacks,
but he was working for the Dodgers at the times
of Buddy of Mine. He was on this podcast. Confirmed
confirmed Benning the Bopper home run with if I used
(12:30):
a metal bat, I used to Corey Snyder, wouldn't bat.
Bad job by me, man, somebody served you up a
real meat ball that day. I was very large, Dan,
I was very large and in charge. I've heard this story. Yeah,
you were very much Bob Horner. No I I I
just got my weight behind it. My eyeballs turned into saucers.
(12:52):
I cashed in on that one. Man that is like,
oh my god, we looked like Dave Parker up there.
It was awesome. How pathetic is it? That's my athletic
highlight right there at almost hitting a ball out of
Dodger Stadium is the athletic highlight. And by the way,
I heard that story once every six months while I
was working with Big because in the anniversary of the story,
(13:14):
we have to tell the story. Yeah, and then people
ask me about It's a fun story. People love to
hear about that. So how did you do in the outfield?
You know, well, no, I played. I actually played first base.
It was a mistake because a lot of these guys
at groundballs and then I had to go cover first
I even played second base at Dodger Stadium a little
(13:37):
bit in the media game, what a bad move by
the manager. Imagine uh, an infielder with no lateral range
to the right or the left as your second baseman. Anyway,
they the guy the managers like, He's like, well, no,
they don't hit it to second base. They either pull
(13:58):
it and they up hitting it down because most of
the guys are right handed, so they try to pull
the ball hit to the left side. When the shortstop
third base whatever. That had to have felt great though.
Hitting a bomb there in that game. Oh it was awesome.
Oh man, it was great. I was a lot younger then,
but uh yeah, anyway, I also got injured in the
(14:18):
media game. A couple of years later. I ended up
on the Channel eleven news in Los Angeles. Uh no,
I was actually you'll get a kick at us. I
was running to first base and I hit the bag wrong,
and it was like my knee exploded. Man. And I
(14:39):
remember looking up and you'll remember this woman. She was
the sideline reporter for Monday Night Football. Yes, Lisa Berrero
was playing in the game and she, uh she looked
at me like, are you okay? I I thought I
was dead or something like that. It was. It was
very bizarre, very bizarre. Right, what is next year? Let's see, Uh, Kevin,
(15:04):
I got mail? Yeah, I got Kevin from Rockford writes
and he says, so I wasn't able to hike Mallard
Mountain yet. I remember this is the guy that told
us he was going to climb up and put the
Mallard sign. Yeah. He said his son tested positive for
COVID the weekend he was supposed to go. So he
(15:25):
changed his plans two over New Year's Kevin said, but
then the Rockies were hit with a big winter storm.
He says he will eventually get there to plant the flag. Well, Kevin,
make sure, as I told you before, it takes lots
of photos, and I will promote that on Instagram and
(15:46):
Facebook and Twitter and all that stuff. Um, that'll be awesome,
he says. Living in California, have you are Danny G
been to the Mount Whitney area. Mount Whitney is the
tallest mountain in the Lower only fourteen feet shorter than
Mount Open, the tallest in Colorado, which I which I
(16:10):
have hiked. Once I'm done with my hiking in Colorado,
Kevin and Rockford says, uh he would like to live
or at least get out to California and conquer Mount Whitney.
He says he's hiked Mount Jacinto in the Palm Springs
area a few times. He says he cheated. He took
the tram. I do the same thing, but he took
(16:32):
the tram down. I would. I would do the same
thing since California's beautiful. I'd lived there if it wasn't
for the high cost of living and weird people. Well,
I agree with you on that, but no, I have
you ever been to Mount Whitney, You ever climbed Mount Whitney?
Ever seen Mount Whitney? Where is Mount Whitney? Where is it?
I don't know exactly where since I've never been there,
(16:55):
but maybe close to that level. As a kid, I
must have been eighteen at the time I did the
half Dome hike at Yosemite. Oh really yeah, and round trip.
I think it's like sixteen miles. But going up, Oh
my god, that killed me. And I was I was
young at the time. I couldn't even do half that hike.
(17:15):
Now I would die. Yeah. Whatever are Yeah, if you're
ever planning a Yosemite trip and you are a hiker, definitely,
um do the half Dome hike. That's awesome. According to
the Internet, And Kevin's probably like rolling his eyes right
now because I told you should have been. Mount Whitney
is the highest mountain the continuous United States, as he
(17:36):
said here in Nevada. It's actually kind of near Fresno.
According to this bad Water America's lowest point bad Water
Basin in Death Valley National Park. It's in too Layer.
Oh to Larry to Larry, there you go. That's a
(17:57):
good looking mountain. I die on that, though, I would
make it up that you kidding me? Alright, what is next?
Alright to Skip the Zip in Akron, Ohio writes and
skipsmen with the show a long time Danny. He was
the original roastmaster general before we did the weekly radio
(18:17):
roast that we we used to have a few celebrity
radio roast, like with Tim Tebow, and I think that
was the first one. I remember a lot, but we've
done some other random ones over the years. Anyway, Skip
writes in uh, he went on a rant about Baker
Mayfield and being in Ohio. He says, Uh, certain haters
(18:39):
are already running out of their fifty five gallon drums
of k y jelly thinking about how Baker Mayfield won't
be under center for the Browns, and uh, you know anymore,
this is the final game whatever after this year. The
focus of my ire, Skip the Zip says, is on
Kevin Steffan Ski says, I've tried to give him the
(19:02):
benefit of the doubt because I truly like him as
a human, but is blatant misuse of the offensive weapons
he was blessed with. Uh, that to have an abhorrent way.
He failed to protect Baker. Mayfield achieved critical mass recently,
Baker looked like absolute crap due to his numerous injuries
(19:26):
and harness, and his inabilitating is his ability to move around.
Blah blah blah blah blah. Uh, and so he's ripping.
Stefanski says all that said primarily because I feel I
can talk to you. Well, thank you, Skip, I appreciate it. Uh,
he says Ben. I must now end my long winded
(19:47):
diet tribe with this question. Would you fire Kevin Stefanski
at the end of the season, and if so, who
the hell would you choose to replace him? To me,
Kevin Stefanski's no, I don't watch the Browns as close
to as you do. I know. Baker went on a
rant we talked about it on the radio show this week,
(20:10):
where he was ripping the play, calling that he didn't
put his name on it, but he told the writer
in Cleveland and and all that. But the problem is,
I think Mayfield's done, so then you're gonna have to
start over with the coach again. I don't know, I
don't know, but I thought Stefanski's offense was fine. He
(20:31):
he clearly didn't trust Baker Mayfield. That's why they ran
the ball, right. If he trusted the quarterback, wouldn't he
have thrown the ball more. I hate to say it,
but Baker Mayfield reminds me of a young Carson Wentz. Yeah,
just just inaccurate. And it's weird though, because it seemed
like he was more accurate passing the football last season.
(20:54):
And maybe you can attribute that to injuries or maybe
that's an excuse. I don't I don't know, but I
mean to blame Stefanski doesn't make a lot of sense
because didn't he have a successful semi successful season last year? Yeah? Yeah,
well they well they made the playoffs. They won a
playoff game. But that was a gift from the Steelers though, right,
I mean that was the Steve Ben Roethlisberger maybe threw
(21:14):
all those interceptions on the game and set Cleveland up.
And what a mess that the year ago, the Browns
were like the team on the come in the end.
I remember all the people betting team preseason. I remember,
on two pros and a cup of Joe. I remember
half of those guys picking the Browns to win that division,
(21:37):
thinking to myself, Wow, this is the team that you're
right that a lot of people thought we're gonna make
another leap forward this year, and they looked pretty decent
at the start of this season, but they fell apart fast. Yeah.
It was like right around the game they played the
Chargers out here and their defense completely imploded. I was
(22:00):
that game and it was like ridiculous. It was like
nobody played any defense the entire day. Anyway, all right,
what is next year? It's all right, calm down. Lord
Goofa from Hooversville, USA says, for you, Ben and Danny
g what is the best worst practical joke that you
(22:23):
played on someone or that was played on you. Well,
we've we've kind of been asked this before, Lord Goofa.
The one that I used to do before the internet
became big around the baseball trade deadline. I would take
an old AP story that had, you know, somebody being traded,
(22:44):
and I would put the most I re package it
and I put the most outrageous trade of the day
into an email and make it look like an AP
wire story, and then I would send it to my
buddies in the in the radio business. You know, back
in email, we didn't you know, social media wasn't the thing,
(23:05):
and and they would fall for it, or I'd send
a text that I just got I'm at the radio station.
There just massive trade down on the wire. You know,
I drought ridiculous names and they fall for it. Now
you can't do that anymore, right? Did I ever tell
you how? When I was hosting a popular morning show
(23:26):
in southern California, I did a bit for April Fools,
But I started it a couple of days before April one,
just to warm the audience up so that they wouldn't
know it was a trick on just that one day.
So what I did is a rumor started on the
morning show that I hooked up with my ex and
(23:49):
she got pregnant. Even the staff in my building thought
it was real. I kept it going. It turned out
to be this whole big thing on the air. People
were calling me off the air, ben giving me warm embraces,
giving me advice on how to deal with the situation,
confiding in me, telling me, you know what, I had
(24:11):
something similar happened. It was an unplanned pregnancy. I mean,
opening up and pouring their guts out to me. I
felt so bad because I knew when I said April
fools that a lot of people were gonna be pissed.
I got in way over my head. Oh by the way,
before I said April fools, the general manager of my
(24:34):
radio station at the time came in and asked me
to come to the hallway and gave me a hug.
So I fooled the general manager of the radio station
I was. I thought for sure I was either going
to get fired or suspended. I know, did he after
the after the bit was revealed, He's like, wait a
(24:56):
minute here, Well it was a she and she had yeah,
great general manager. But I felt so bad when I
said April fools on the air. It wasn't the payoff
that I was hoping for. I didn't realize it was
gonna tug at people, uh in their heart strings the
way it did, and the way people thought they were
(25:19):
gonna like come to my aid and help me through
the situation. I just thought it was gonna be funny
that I tricked everybody, But instead I learned a valuable
lesson when it comes to personal things like that, don't
go there with the jokes. Because so many people were
calling me and talking to me off the air trying
(25:40):
to console me. They were piste obviously when they found
out it was all a joke. Oh yeah, of course.
I mean because you're not supposed to joke about personal stuff, Danny.
That's like the rule, right. It was gonna be my
first kid. Wow. That's uh, that is unbelievable that I
(26:02):
was gonna read some more emails. But that's a great
way to end this. I don't know that we can
top that story. So thanks to Brandon from Howell, he's
a big fan. We didn't have time to get to
your question. Tom from Fullerton, Jimmy from Fayetteville, Tennessee, and
all you other guys. Uh, but we we did have
your emails, but we didn't have time to get to him.
(26:23):
But Danny Fete you tremendous weekend. I can't believe the
voice held up. We recorded this after doing a night
I did a night or radio and I was convinced
I would not be able to do the podcast. But
thanks to you helping me out here, saving me, carrying me,
we made it through the entire weekend and hopefully I'll
(26:44):
be sounding much better tonight. Good job by you. This
is your Michael Jordan's COVID game. Yeah exactly, yes, I
I proved. And just for the record, I missed one
show with COVID, but really even really need to miss
the one show, Uh to be I could have worked.
But but anyway, I feel fine. But I have a
(27:07):
great last NFL Sunday, and uh, thank you, and we'll
be back next week and we'll probably get back into
the interviews on Friday and that kind of normal. Uh
rigam roar. But to have a tremendous rest of your weekend.
Catch me on the radio tonight and find us on
Twitter and all that good stuff, and we will catch
you next time. Thank you. Go Raiders win in your end, baby,
(27:30):
How dare you
Boom. If you thought four hours a day, minutes a
week was enough, think again. He's the last remnants of
the old republic, a sole fashion of fairness. He treats
crackheads in the ghetto cutter the same as the rich
pill poppers in the penthouse. The clearing House of hot
takes break free for something special. The Fifth Hour with
(00:23):
Ben Maller starts right now in the air everywhere a
Sunday Sunday edition of The Fifth Hour with Ben Maller
and Day and h G Radio because hey, the overnight
show during the week not enough bonus bonus covers. I
(00:44):
think this is the eighth day of a week actually
for the show on Sunday and the last NFL regular
season Sunday Nanny. Now most people seem to listen to
this in the morning, but I mean there are people
that go back and listen later. But this is it.
This is the playoffs start next week and you you
(01:04):
have a raided playoff game today the night the Raiders
and the and the Chargers. So that's right, flex to
the Sunday night football game on NBC. Cannot wait for
the Raiders and Chargers. Man, I got screwed a couple
of years ago, I I was in Seattle and the
Seahawk forty Niner game that that year. It was it
(01:26):
was week I think it was Week seventeen, and it
got flexed to the Sunday night game and it was
like I couldn't get in, And when all I went
to Seattle and hung out outside the stadium, I was
banned from going to STA. Have you been to a
Raider game in Vegas yet? I have not been yet.
I was tempted to trade shifts with somebody at the
(01:49):
network and try to get out there for tonight's game.
I think that this is gonna be the first game
in Vegas where the home field advantage really makes a different.
The tickets are insane, though. I was talking to Eddie
about this during the week, and Eddie was, you know,
his wife's a big Charger fan, and they were thinking
about going, and they said, even on the second, you know,
(02:09):
the cheapest ticket they get get Yeah, it was like
six hundred bucks or something like that. I think it
might even be more than that, but it was ridiculous. Yeah.
It's funny because when you look at the schedule to
the right down the side of all the games, it
says tickets as low as and you're supposed to click
on if you want tickets, and teams said like twenty dollars.
(02:33):
One team where said forty eight dollars. Then you get
to Las Vegas and it said four hundred and eight
dollars as low as four hundred and eight dollars. Yeah,
we probably talked about this in the past on the
terrestrial radio show what is the most you would spend
on an NFL ticket? Yeah, we've talked about this recently
(02:55):
on the air. Um, you're right at Fox Sports Radio Network.
This has come up couple of times. And I think
that I said six hundred for me, like six hundred
dollars because I could see paying twelve hundred for a
pair of a really really crucial important playoff game. Maybe
if that gets you into a Super Bowl. I cannot
(03:17):
see paying more your rent or mortgage though on tickets. Yeah,
that's that's a tough one. I have. Roberto, I remember
bought a ticket to the seen World Series, the Dodgers game,
I think it was Game two, and I believe he's
still paying it off right now. And and that was
(03:37):
of course the cheating as strows. He used Klarna where
they let him pay monthly. Oh my god, what a nightmare. Anyway,
let's get to the mail bag. What do you say?
Here we go right now, let's do it. Big tip
(03:59):
of the microphone to our buddy Ohio Owl who made
that song in a brilliant rendition, because we're still playing
it and we'll probably play it for a long time
to come, but thanks to Ohio Aw. So these are
actual letters send in via email or posted on the
show facebook page, which is Ben mall or show. That's
(04:21):
the Facebook And every Tuesday I post on the Facebook page,
usually in the morning, but by by the afternoon. Normally
I post I say, hey, help us out. We need
some questions. And we have a very good, loyal group
of big fans. I'd love to get some new people
(04:44):
involved and to mix it up and get some new voices.
There's no pressure. Maybe you only want to ask a
question one time, UM, and that's fine, but you know
it's great. I really, I really appreciate the people that
take time out, shake things up and send questions in.
So the first one uh and you can also email
(05:05):
the questions by the way, Real fifth hour at gmail
dot com. First once from Jennifer and Richmond, Virginia. She says,
great to have your back. Sorry to hear you weren't
feeling well. My question this week is did you know
the most recent episode of Curb Your Enthusiasm was the
(05:26):
season finale? She says, I had no idea until days after.
I don't have cable. I use a quote secret unquote
streaming service, so I had no clue. I thought there
would be at least two more episodes. Uh, yeah, I
I was aware. Um My brother in law works on
(05:50):
Curb Your Enthusiasm as one of the crew guys, and
so he told stories. I actually watched, and hopefully you
can get this, Jennifer. You know Bob Einstein, better known
as Super Dave Osborne. You're around my age, don't you
remember Super Dave back? Right? The guy was a legend.
(06:11):
I love that he passed away. Wow back And they
made this really cool documentary on HBO. And if if
you're around our age and you remember super Dave, it
was awesome. You know, I was flashing back. I loved
him on The Letterman Show and all the dumb stupid
Uh he was doing a parody of Evil Kinevil. You know,
(06:35):
Super Dave, And they did a really nice retrospective on
his life in Hollywood, Bob Einstein and that's his legal name,
Bob Einstein, but better known as Super Dave of Osborne.
And that was pretty cool. And Jennifer also says that
you get the squirrel video that I said, and I
(06:57):
did not. Jennifer's in Richmond and Danny. She has trained
the squirrels in her backyard. She feeds them peanuts and
it was really it was really funny. I mean, this
one squirrel was trying to hoard all the all the peanuts.
It was I think Lenny was the name of the squirrel.
She named the squirrel Lenny, and it was It was
(07:19):
really good. Have you ever fed squirrels chip monks roasting
on an open fire? Exactly? Exactly. No. I know from
the time I was a little kid, I remember family
members always saying those things have brabies, don't get near it. Oh.
I know, of course they all sell that. But I
actually in central California, uh, near the Hearst Castle, which
(07:43):
I love that area. Uh. The I've told this story before,
but we were me and my wife will go there
quite a bit. You were trying to go once a year, Yeah,
San Simmon where they you can feed the seals, Yes,
I can't feed them, but you can watch them far
and lose their skin. And the lions is it lions seals?
(08:05):
Is that where they are anyway? Whatever they are, it's
it's it's right across from the Hearst Castle and the
beach there is pretty cool. By the way, have you
been to that beach right across from the hers Castle.
I have, Yeah, they have a pier. It's always foggy.
It's uh, it's pretty neat. Yeah, that area is nice.
If you ever get to California, go to San simeon
(08:25):
E Bay is not bad rock. They have the big
giant rock there. Beautiful. I love that area. It's unsullied
because William Howard Hurst or William Randolph Howard Hurst, right
he uh he when he died, his family just left
all the land, so all of central California. Yeah, you'll
(08:46):
imagine if somebody else owned that, there'd be big cities there.
And yeah, somebody from Oregon told me that that reminded
them their beaches. Like you said, it's not developed, Yeah, no,
it beautiful. It is uh wonderful. All right, what's next year?
Let's see alright, Kevin and Kansas says dear Ben and
(09:09):
Danny g thanks for soldiering through Ben with the voice issues.
Where you're You're welcome given. Uh. He says, you were
missed blah blah blah blah blah during the end of
the year. Were you able to be a normal person
on your sleep schedule for a while? Uh? If so,
how do you adjust back to your regular daytime, uh
(09:30):
sleep schedule? Well, it was pretty easy, Kevin, because I
couldn't go anywhere. As we talked about in the Saturday podcast,
when you have COVID, you are an ogre. Uh, you
have cooties. You are not allowed to be seen in
a polite society. And um so we just stayed home
(09:53):
and it was very boring and just stayed in bed
and watched TV, and I watched YouTube videos and and whatever,
played video games and uh pretty much just tried to
pass the time. Um So, but we did. I did
change my schedule a little bit. I went to bed
probably six five or six hours earlier than I normally do,
(10:16):
which is still late at night. But I can't completely
turn my schedule all the way around. I can't do
it because I'm just a night person. I'm just wired
that way. But you know, I don't know, did Danny
did you? You were working radio, so you couldn't really
change your schedule at all. Huh. Through Christmas and New
Year's Eve, I was working some shifts at the network,
(10:37):
so I had to be honest, a tight schedule. But
then once New Year's Eve happened and I stayed up,
I got home like at eleven thirty pm, so I
made it by a half hour to have a toast
with my TINDERRONI. But we stayed up. Like for us,
we laugh, we're like partying hard if we stay up
till eleven pm. We actually stayed until to thirty am. Wow,
(11:02):
my schedule has been thrown off ever since then. I've
been staying up way too late at night lately, so
I'm gonna have to flip it back around before school
starts Monday. So you have a few a few more
hours tomorrow, I should say, yeah, right, a few more
hours and then back to it. Alright, who is next here?
(11:24):
Let's see any meny miny mo come back. It's from
call that's right, Pierre from Springfield, the Massachusetts some of
the Pro Basketball Hall of Fame where you can see
muffin McGraw and tried uh and Pierce. Has been any
truth to the rumor that I Heart is in negotiations
(11:46):
to add Antonio Brown to the Fifth Hour Mixed Mimic,
two Pros and a Cup of Joe. Of course a
b doesn't have your athletic resume, but he'd just be
the third man in anyway, Does Danny g know that
Benning the Bopper once hit a ball that, if using
(12:07):
an aluminum bat, would have cleared the fence at Dodgers Well,
that is true, by the way, Danny. That is verified
Derrick call who is the CEO of the Arizona Diamondbacks,
but he was working for the Dodgers at the times
of Buddy of Mine. He was on this podcast. Confirmed
confirmed Benning the Bopper home run with if I used
(12:30):
a metal bat, I used to Corey Snyder, wouldn't bat.
Bad job by me, man, somebody served you up a
real meat ball that day. I was very large, Dan,
I was very large and in charge. I've heard this story. Yeah,
you were very much Bob Horner. No I I I
just got my weight behind it. My eyeballs turned into saucers.
(12:52):
I cashed in on that one. Man that is like,
oh my god, we looked like Dave Parker up there.
It was awesome. How pathetic is it? That's my athletic
highlight right there at almost hitting a ball out of
Dodger Stadium is the athletic highlight. And by the way,
I heard that story once every six months while I
was working with Big because in the anniversary of the story,
(13:14):
we have to tell the story. Yeah, and then people
ask me about It's a fun story. People love to
hear about that. So how did you do in the outfield?
You know, well, no, I played. I actually played first base.
It was a mistake because a lot of these guys
at groundballs and then I had to go cover first
I even played second base at Dodger Stadium a little
(13:37):
bit in the media game, what a bad move by
the manager. Imagine uh, an infielder with no lateral range
to the right or the left as your second baseman. Anyway,
they the guy the managers like, He's like, well, no,
they don't hit it to second base. They either pull
(13:58):
it and they up hitting it down because most of
the guys are right handed, so they try to pull
the ball hit to the left side. When the shortstop
third base whatever. That had to have felt great though.
Hitting a bomb there in that game. Oh it was awesome.
Oh man, it was great. I was a lot younger then,
but uh yeah, anyway, I also got injured in the
(14:18):
media game. A couple of years later. I ended up
on the Channel eleven news in Los Angeles. Uh no,
I was actually you'll get a kick at us. I
was running to first base and I hit the bag wrong,
and it was like my knee exploded. Man. And I
(14:39):
remember looking up and you'll remember this woman. She was
the sideline reporter for Monday Night Football. Yes, Lisa Berrero
was playing in the game and she, uh she looked
at me like, are you okay? I I thought I
was dead or something like that. It was. It was
very bizarre, very bizarre. Right, what is next year? Let's see, Uh, Kevin,
(15:04):
I got mail? Yeah, I got Kevin from Rockford writes
and he says, so I wasn't able to hike Mallard
Mountain yet. I remember this is the guy that told
us he was going to climb up and put the
Mallard sign. Yeah. He said his son tested positive for
COVID the weekend he was supposed to go. So he
(15:25):
changed his plans two over New Year's Kevin said, but
then the Rockies were hit with a big winter storm.
He says he will eventually get there to plant the flag. Well, Kevin,
make sure, as I told you before, it takes lots
of photos, and I will promote that on Instagram and
(15:46):
Facebook and Twitter and all that stuff. Um, that'll be awesome,
he says. Living in California, have you are Danny G
been to the Mount Whitney area. Mount Whitney is the
tallest mountain in the Lower only fourteen feet shorter than
Mount Open, the tallest in Colorado, which I which I
(16:10):
have hiked. Once I'm done with my hiking in Colorado,
Kevin and Rockford says, uh he would like to live
or at least get out to California and conquer Mount Whitney.
He says he's hiked Mount Jacinto in the Palm Springs
area a few times. He says he cheated. He took
the tram. I do the same thing, but he took
(16:32):
the tram down. I would. I would do the same
thing since California's beautiful. I'd lived there if it wasn't
for the high cost of living and weird people. Well,
I agree with you on that, but no, I have
you ever been to Mount Whitney, You ever climbed Mount Whitney?
Ever seen Mount Whitney? Where is Mount Whitney? Where is it?
I don't know exactly where since I've never been there,
(16:55):
but maybe close to that level. As a kid, I
must have been eighteen at the time I did the
half Dome hike at Yosemite. Oh really yeah, and round trip.
I think it's like sixteen miles. But going up, Oh
my god, that killed me. And I was I was
young at the time. I couldn't even do half that hike.
(17:15):
Now I would die. Yeah. Whatever are Yeah, if you're
ever planning a Yosemite trip and you are a hiker, definitely,
um do the half Dome hike. That's awesome. According to
the Internet, And Kevin's probably like rolling his eyes right
now because I told you should have been. Mount Whitney
is the highest mountain the continuous United States, as he
(17:36):
said here in Nevada. It's actually kind of near Fresno.
According to this bad Water America's lowest point bad Water
Basin in Death Valley National Park. It's in too Layer.
Oh to Larry to Larry, there you go. That's a
(17:57):
good looking mountain. I die on that, though, I would
make it up that you kidding me? Alright, what is next?
Alright to Skip the Zip in Akron, Ohio writes and
skipsmen with the show a long time Danny. He was
the original roastmaster general before we did the weekly radio
(18:17):
roast that we we used to have a few celebrity
radio roast, like with Tim Tebow, and I think that
was the first one. I remember a lot, but we've
done some other random ones over the years. Anyway, Skip
writes in uh, he went on a rant about Baker
Mayfield and being in Ohio. He says, Uh, certain haters
(18:39):
are already running out of their fifty five gallon drums
of k y jelly thinking about how Baker Mayfield won't
be under center for the Browns, and uh, you know anymore,
this is the final game whatever after this year. The
focus of my ire, Skip the Zip says, is on
Kevin Steffan Ski says, I've tried to give him the
(19:02):
benefit of the doubt because I truly like him as
a human, but is blatant misuse of the offensive weapons
he was blessed with. Uh, that to have an abhorrent way.
He failed to protect Baker. Mayfield achieved critical mass recently,
Baker looked like absolute crap due to his numerous injuries
(19:26):
and harness, and his inabilitating is his ability to move around.
Blah blah blah blah blah. Uh, and so he's ripping.
Stefanski says all that said primarily because I feel I
can talk to you. Well, thank you, Skip, I appreciate it. Uh,
he says Ben. I must now end my long winded
(19:47):
diet tribe with this question. Would you fire Kevin Stefanski
at the end of the season, and if so, who
the hell would you choose to replace him? To me,
Kevin Stefanski's no, I don't watch the Browns as close
to as you do. I know. Baker went on a
rant we talked about it on the radio show this week,
(20:10):
where he was ripping the play, calling that he didn't
put his name on it, but he told the writer
in Cleveland and and all that. But the problem is,
I think Mayfield's done, so then you're gonna have to
start over with the coach again. I don't know, I
don't know, but I thought Stefanski's offense was fine. He
(20:31):
he clearly didn't trust Baker Mayfield. That's why they ran
the ball, right. If he trusted the quarterback, wouldn't he
have thrown the ball more. I hate to say it,
but Baker Mayfield reminds me of a young Carson Wentz. Yeah,
just just inaccurate. And it's weird though, because it seemed
like he was more accurate passing the football last season.
(20:54):
And maybe you can attribute that to injuries or maybe
that's an excuse. I don't I don't know, but I
mean to blame Stefanski doesn't make a lot of sense
because didn't he have a successful semi successful season last year? Yeah? Yeah,
well they well they made the playoffs. They won a
playoff game. But that was a gift from the Steelers though, right,
I mean that was the Steve Ben Roethlisberger maybe threw
(21:14):
all those interceptions on the game and set Cleveland up.
And what a mess that the year ago, the Browns
were like the team on the come in the end.
I remember all the people betting team preseason. I remember,
on two pros and a cup of Joe. I remember
half of those guys picking the Browns to win that division,
(21:37):
thinking to myself, Wow, this is the team that you're
right that a lot of people thought we're gonna make
another leap forward this year, and they looked pretty decent
at the start of this season, but they fell apart fast. Yeah.
It was like right around the game they played the
Chargers out here and their defense completely imploded. I was
(22:00):
that game and it was like ridiculous. It was like
nobody played any defense the entire day. Anyway, all right,
what is next year? It's all right, calm down. Lord
Goofa from Hooversville, USA says, for you, Ben and Danny
g what is the best worst practical joke that you
(22:23):
played on someone or that was played on you. Well,
we've we've kind of been asked this before, Lord Goofa.
The one that I used to do before the internet
became big around the baseball trade deadline. I would take
an old AP story that had, you know, somebody being traded,
(22:44):
and I would put the most I re package it
and I put the most outrageous trade of the day
into an email and make it look like an AP
wire story, and then I would send it to my
buddies in the in the radio business. You know, back
in email, we didn't you know, social media wasn't the thing,
(23:05):
and and they would fall for it, or I'd send
a text that I just got I'm at the radio station.
There just massive trade down on the wire. You know,
I drought ridiculous names and they fall for it. Now
you can't do that anymore, right? Did I ever tell
you how? When I was hosting a popular morning show
(23:26):
in southern California, I did a bit for April Fools,
But I started it a couple of days before April one,
just to warm the audience up so that they wouldn't
know it was a trick on just that one day.
So what I did is a rumor started on the
morning show that I hooked up with my ex and
(23:49):
she got pregnant. Even the staff in my building thought
it was real. I kept it going. It turned out
to be this whole big thing on the air. People
were calling me off the air, ben giving me warm embraces,
giving me advice on how to deal with the situation,
confiding in me, telling me, you know what, I had
(24:11):
something similar happened. It was an unplanned pregnancy. I mean,
opening up and pouring their guts out to me. I
felt so bad because I knew when I said April
fools that a lot of people were gonna be pissed.
I got in way over my head. Oh by the way,
before I said April fools, the general manager of my
(24:34):
radio station at the time came in and asked me
to come to the hallway and gave me a hug.
So I fooled the general manager of the radio station
I was. I thought for sure I was either going
to get fired or suspended. I know, did he after
the after the bit was revealed, He's like, wait a
(24:56):
minute here, Well it was a she and she had yeah,
great general manager. But I felt so bad when I
said April fools on the air. It wasn't the payoff
that I was hoping for. I didn't realize it was
gonna tug at people, uh in their heart strings the
way it did, and the way people thought they were
(25:19):
gonna like come to my aid and help me through
the situation. I just thought it was gonna be funny
that I tricked everybody, But instead I learned a valuable
lesson when it comes to personal things like that, don't
go there with the jokes. Because so many people were
calling me and talking to me off the air trying
(25:40):
to console me. They were piste obviously when they found
out it was all a joke. Oh yeah, of course.
I mean because you're not supposed to joke about personal stuff, Danny.
That's like the rule, right. It was gonna be my
first kid. Wow. That's uh, that is unbelievable that I
(26:02):
was gonna read some more emails. But that's a great
way to end this. I don't know that we can
top that story. So thanks to Brandon from Howell, he's
a big fan. We didn't have time to get to
your question. Tom from Fullerton, Jimmy from Fayetteville, Tennessee, and
all you other guys. Uh, but we we did have
your emails, but we didn't have time to get to him.
(26:23):
But Danny Fete you tremendous weekend. I can't believe the
voice held up. We recorded this after doing a night
I did a night or radio and I was convinced
I would not be able to do the podcast. But
thanks to you helping me out here, saving me, carrying me,
we made it through the entire weekend and hopefully I'll
(26:44):
be sounding much better tonight. Good job by you. This
is your Michael Jordan's COVID game. Yeah exactly, yes, I
I proved. And just for the record, I missed one
show with COVID, but really even really need to miss
the one show, Uh to be I could have worked.
But but anyway, I feel fine. But I have a
(27:07):
great last NFL Sunday, and uh, thank you, and we'll
be back next week and we'll probably get back into
the interviews on Friday and that kind of normal. Uh
rigam roar. But to have a tremendous rest of your weekend.
Catch me on the radio tonight and find us on
Twitter and all that good stuff, and we will catch
you next time. Thank you. Go Raiders win in your end, baby,
(27:30):
How dare you
Host
Ben Maller
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