January 14, 2025 • 7 mins
Tuesday relationships and therapy intersect on my show and today we talked to Laurie about being direct in dating.
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:01):
It's time to make a date or break on tip
in the morning.
Speaker 2 (00:06):
Good morning, it has been.
Speaker 1 (00:07):
A minute since we've done this. This is where relationships
in therapy come together. On my show on Tuesday Mornings,
we talked to Lori Sharpage, who's our licensed clinical counselor
and an expert in the relationship world, the dating world.
Speaker 2 (00:20):
Good morning, Lorie, Good morning, test it's been a while.
It's good to hear your voice. Agreed.
Speaker 1 (00:28):
So I tested this theory out a couple of days ago,
and that is simply this one simple thing that you
can do in the dating world that girls one hundred
percent are overthinking and overlooking.
Speaker 2 (00:40):
And I bet guys would agree with me on that.
Speaker 1 (00:42):
And that is simply saying before I give you any context,
just simply saying exactly what you want, what are your
initial thoughts on that?
Speaker 3 (00:51):
So I love it and I think that this is
a great strategy that actually extends beyond dating. This is
a great thing to do in your life. And one
of us have been taught to not exactly go fully
after what we want, or say fully want, but to
try and kind of beat around the bush, so to speak,
and it just is not a great strategy. When you
step into your own power and you're like, this is
(01:13):
what I want. You can get so much more, so
much faster.
Speaker 2 (01:17):
So I love this.
Speaker 1 (01:18):
Okay, so let me tell you the context portion of this,
and you'll have to let me know if I did
it right or not. Since I'm new in the dating world,
I met I met someone in the wild and I
was I was, We're like a week indo texting right
and I'm chilling with my neighbor who lives next door
to me. He's a guy, and I was kind of
getting his advice on it. I was like, what should
(01:39):
I say in this text message. He's like, Tiffy, what
do you mean You're overthinking it? And I'm like, well,
what do you mean I'm over there? He's like, you're
trying to You're You're like, you either need to, like
you go on one date and you decide do I
want to hang out with this person more or do
I want to hang out with this person left less.
Speaker 2 (01:53):
He's like, I either go left on it or I
go right on it.
Speaker 1 (01:56):
And so I think as girls were way for guys
to make the first move, we're waiting for them to
court us. We're waiting for we're just waiting. We're waiting
for them, And I've learned that we pretty much have
two very different communication styles. My neighbor goes just simply
ask him, do you want to hang out tonight? Yes?
Speaker 2 (02:16):
Or no?
Speaker 1 (02:17):
And so I sent that text message. I said, hey,
you know, do you want to hang out tonight? And
he immediately came back and said yes absolutely. Meanwhile, the
entire time, I was thinking, you know, you know, should
we just kind of like give it a couple of options?
Speaker 2 (02:32):
Should I just do this? Should I do that?
Speaker 1 (02:34):
My neighbor goes, don't give him any options, just say
do you want to hang out tonight?
Speaker 2 (02:37):
Yes?
Speaker 3 (02:38):
Or no?
Speaker 1 (02:38):
And I don't know, as from a girl's standpoint, it's
not that I'm I don't maybe I'm just overthinking it.
I'm also naive and new to this situation too, But
I wanted to get your take on that.
Speaker 2 (02:49):
What are you hearing?
Speaker 3 (02:50):
I definitely don't think you're overthinking and I think you
did exactly right. I think that we are taught a
lot as girls to kind of take care of everybody's
needs all around us and not necessarily focused on our own.
And what you did yesterday by just simplifying that or
the other day. By just simplifying the text is basically
(03:10):
you just said here's what's up, yes or no, and
you put yourself in a more vulnerable position by doing that,
but in a more assertive So I think.
Speaker 2 (03:18):
You did a great job.
Speaker 3 (03:21):
And I think that people are actually happier and more
comfortable when we give them less choices. So by just
making it a yes or no choice, I think you
actually made it easier on the person you're talking with
and connecting with too.
Speaker 1 (03:34):
But there at this point it feels as if I
will you're right correct, and you're correct.
Speaker 2 (03:42):
I'm trying not to overthink it. I'm just trying to
be like yes or no, yes or no, this or that.
Speaker 1 (03:46):
It's very new to me because I would say on
a girls standpoint, girls like details, girls like options, girls
and choices. We like to either, we like to pivot,
we like to be you know, we're going here, we're
going there, And guys are very much like you just
tell me ye us or no yep.
Speaker 3 (04:03):
I think that part of the want of the details
and wanting the options is like it shows that somebody
has checked in and is considering you and is wanting
to provide you with that, and I think that's what
you were doing initially. But by making this a simpler
choice of like do we just want to hang out,
you got to the answer faster. And I think that
(04:23):
that's a pretty cool thing for you to do when
you're really working on what do you want? And honestly,
what I want is like one of the hardest questions
that we have to answer, and it's it's just a
hard one that we have to really kind of put
ourselves out there and do. So I think you did
it exactly right. I do get that it's uncomfortable and
(04:45):
it's a change in how you're thinking about things, but
I like this. I'm interested for you to continue to
try this on for yourself.
Speaker 1 (04:53):
I mean, we're keeping it simple. You guys know my
New Year's res twenty twenty five. We're just relax. We're
just going to keep it schill. We're gonna relax. We're
not gonna overthink you.
Speaker 2 (05:01):
We're just gonna do it. We're just gonna, you know,
keep it simple.
Speaker 1 (05:03):
The one question that I will never answer, though, Lourie,
and I bet you already know what it is. It's
when someone says, Tiff, what do you, what do you
what do you want to eat?
Speaker 2 (05:15):
Are you hungry? What do you want to eat? Don't
ask don't ever ask me that question. You'll regret it.
Speaker 1 (05:21):
It will be the worst decision of your life. Oh, Laurie,
it is so good to hear your voice on my
show again. I appreciate I miss you. Make a Date
or Break it's a relationships and therapy intersect on Tiff
in the Morning, and Laurie's our relationship expert. She joins
us on Tuesdays. It's good to hear from you.
Speaker 3 (05:42):
Oh, it's great to be here. Thanks so much again
for having.
Speaker 1 (05:45):
Me by Gal. All right, if you've got a question
for us or for her, really, you can reach out
to us on social media. Leave me a talk back
with TIF too. That's always a good alternative. When you
search Kiss on iHeartRadio, you'll see the microphone right next
to the play button. Good morning, and don't ever ask
me what I want to eat?
Speaker 2 (06:04):
Good morning.
Speaker 1 (06:05):
You're waking up with TIF in the morning on Kiss
one oh seven one, or in the midst of Make
a Date or Break. It's where relationships and therapy come
together on my show on Tuesdays. And I sought out
a guy in the office to test this theory. If
you're just walking into this conversation. Our licensed clinical counselor
Lorie sharp Page and I were just chatting about girls
simply saying exactly what they want and not overthinking it. Liam,
(06:28):
I mean, it depends what they want. But I like
hearing what they want. But I mean, they say what
they want and I don't want to hear it. But
it just turns on the situation, I guess. But I
do like hear what I said them being direct.
Speaker 2 (06:40):
Okay.
Speaker 1 (06:40):
So maybe it's more just the idea of being direct,
because in the dating world, I think girls are like, well,
we could do this, or we could do that, or
you know, I'm gonna wait for him to say something
and I'm gonna wait for him to do this and
do that, and instead of doing that, just saying, hey,
do you want to hang out tonight?
Speaker 2 (06:58):
Yes?
Speaker 3 (06:58):
Or no? Yeah.
Speaker 2 (06:59):
That's the same thing like picking a movie.
Speaker 3 (07:00):
I'll be scrolling like all I could watch this, I
could watch this, and I'll pick a movie.
Speaker 2 (07:03):
Watch don't want to watch that movie. You know what
I'm saying, you direct, Okay, so that's what I want
to hear also sometimes but yeah.
Speaker 1 (07:09):
You like a direct Okay, all right, there you go.
Thank you, Liam, I appreciate you. We're in the midst
of just testing out new theories in twenty twenty five
on Tiff in the Morning. In the meantime, we're still
commercial free and we're not far off from the three.
Speaker 2 (07:22):
Things you need to know to get your day started.
And since you don't go far
It's time to make a date or break on tip
in the morning.
Speaker 2 (00:06):
Good morning, it has been.
Speaker 1 (00:07):
A minute since we've done this. This is where relationships
in therapy come together. On my show on Tuesday Mornings,
we talked to Lori Sharpage, who's our licensed clinical counselor
and an expert in the relationship world, the dating world.
Speaker 2 (00:20):
Good morning, Lorie, Good morning, test it's been a while.
It's good to hear your voice. Agreed.
Speaker 1 (00:28):
So I tested this theory out a couple of days ago,
and that is simply this one simple thing that you
can do in the dating world that girls one hundred
percent are overthinking and overlooking.
Speaker 2 (00:40):
And I bet guys would agree with me on that.
Speaker 1 (00:42):
And that is simply saying before I give you any context,
just simply saying exactly what you want, what are your
initial thoughts on that?
Speaker 3 (00:51):
So I love it and I think that this is
a great strategy that actually extends beyond dating. This is
a great thing to do in your life. And one
of us have been taught to not exactly go fully
after what we want, or say fully want, but to
try and kind of beat around the bush, so to speak,
and it just is not a great strategy. When you
step into your own power and you're like, this is
(01:13):
what I want. You can get so much more, so
much faster.
Speaker 2 (01:17):
So I love this.
Speaker 1 (01:18):
Okay, so let me tell you the context portion of this,
and you'll have to let me know if I did
it right or not. Since I'm new in the dating world,
I met I met someone in the wild and I
was I was, We're like a week indo texting right
and I'm chilling with my neighbor who lives next door
to me. He's a guy, and I was kind of
getting his advice on it. I was like, what should
(01:39):
I say in this text message. He's like, Tiffy, what
do you mean You're overthinking it? And I'm like, well,
what do you mean I'm over there? He's like, you're
trying to You're You're like, you either need to, like
you go on one date and you decide do I
want to hang out with this person more or do
I want to hang out with this person left less.
Speaker 2 (01:53):
He's like, I either go left on it or I
go right on it.
Speaker 1 (01:56):
And so I think as girls were way for guys
to make the first move, we're waiting for them to
court us. We're waiting for we're just waiting. We're waiting
for them, And I've learned that we pretty much have
two very different communication styles. My neighbor goes just simply
ask him, do you want to hang out tonight? Yes?
Speaker 2 (02:16):
Or no?
Speaker 1 (02:17):
And so I sent that text message. I said, hey,
you know, do you want to hang out tonight? And
he immediately came back and said yes absolutely. Meanwhile, the
entire time, I was thinking, you know, you know, should
we just kind of like give it a couple of options?
Speaker 2 (02:32):
Should I just do this? Should I do that?
Speaker 1 (02:34):
My neighbor goes, don't give him any options, just say
do you want to hang out tonight?
Speaker 2 (02:37):
Yes?
Speaker 3 (02:38):
Or no?
Speaker 1 (02:38):
And I don't know, as from a girl's standpoint, it's
not that I'm I don't maybe I'm just overthinking it.
I'm also naive and new to this situation too, But
I wanted to get your take on that.
Speaker 2 (02:49):
What are you hearing?
Speaker 3 (02:50):
I definitely don't think you're overthinking and I think you
did exactly right. I think that we are taught a
lot as girls to kind of take care of everybody's
needs all around us and not necessarily focused on our own.
And what you did yesterday by just simplifying that or
the other day. By just simplifying the text is basically
(03:10):
you just said here's what's up, yes or no, and
you put yourself in a more vulnerable position by doing that,
but in a more assertive So I think.
Speaker 2 (03:18):
You did a great job.
Speaker 3 (03:21):
And I think that people are actually happier and more
comfortable when we give them less choices. So by just
making it a yes or no choice, I think you
actually made it easier on the person you're talking with
and connecting with too.
Speaker 1 (03:34):
But there at this point it feels as if I
will you're right correct, and you're correct.
Speaker 2 (03:42):
I'm trying not to overthink it. I'm just trying to
be like yes or no, yes or no, this or that.
Speaker 1 (03:46):
It's very new to me because I would say on
a girls standpoint, girls like details, girls like options, girls
and choices. We like to either, we like to pivot,
we like to be you know, we're going here, we're
going there, And guys are very much like you just
tell me ye us or no yep.
Speaker 3 (04:03):
I think that part of the want of the details
and wanting the options is like it shows that somebody
has checked in and is considering you and is wanting
to provide you with that, and I think that's what
you were doing initially. But by making this a simpler
choice of like do we just want to hang out,
you got to the answer faster. And I think that
(04:23):
that's a pretty cool thing for you to do when
you're really working on what do you want? And honestly,
what I want is like one of the hardest questions
that we have to answer, and it's it's just a
hard one that we have to really kind of put
ourselves out there and do. So I think you did
it exactly right. I do get that it's uncomfortable and
(04:45):
it's a change in how you're thinking about things, but
I like this. I'm interested for you to continue to
try this on for yourself.
Speaker 1 (04:53):
I mean, we're keeping it simple. You guys know my
New Year's res twenty twenty five. We're just relax. We're
just going to keep it schill. We're gonna relax. We're
not gonna overthink you.
Speaker 2 (05:01):
We're just gonna do it. We're just gonna, you know,
keep it simple.
Speaker 1 (05:03):
The one question that I will never answer, though, Lourie,
and I bet you already know what it is. It's
when someone says, Tiff, what do you, what do you
what do you want to eat?
Speaker 2 (05:15):
Are you hungry? What do you want to eat? Don't
ask don't ever ask me that question. You'll regret it.
Speaker 1 (05:21):
It will be the worst decision of your life. Oh, Laurie,
it is so good to hear your voice on my
show again. I appreciate I miss you. Make a Date
or Break it's a relationships and therapy intersect on Tiff
in the Morning, and Laurie's our relationship expert. She joins
us on Tuesdays. It's good to hear from you.
Speaker 3 (05:42):
Oh, it's great to be here. Thanks so much again
for having.
Speaker 1 (05:45):
Me by Gal. All right, if you've got a question
for us or for her, really, you can reach out
to us on social media. Leave me a talk back
with TIF too. That's always a good alternative. When you
search Kiss on iHeartRadio, you'll see the microphone right next
to the play button. Good morning, and don't ever ask
me what I want to eat?
Speaker 2 (06:04):
Good morning.
Speaker 1 (06:05):
You're waking up with TIF in the morning on Kiss
one oh seven one, or in the midst of Make
a Date or Break. It's where relationships and therapy come
together on my show on Tuesdays. And I sought out
a guy in the office to test this theory. If
you're just walking into this conversation. Our licensed clinical counselor
Lorie sharp Page and I were just chatting about girls
simply saying exactly what they want and not overthinking it. Liam,
(06:28):
I mean, it depends what they want. But I like
hearing what they want. But I mean, they say what
they want and I don't want to hear it. But
it just turns on the situation, I guess. But I
do like hear what I said them being direct.
Speaker 2 (06:40):
Okay.
Speaker 1 (06:40):
So maybe it's more just the idea of being direct,
because in the dating world, I think girls are like, well,
we could do this, or we could do that, or
you know, I'm gonna wait for him to say something
and I'm gonna wait for him to do this and
do that, and instead of doing that, just saying, hey,
do you want to hang out tonight?
Speaker 2 (06:58):
Yes?
Speaker 3 (06:58):
Or no? Yeah.
Speaker 2 (06:59):
That's the same thing like picking a movie.
Speaker 3 (07:00):
I'll be scrolling like all I could watch this, I
could watch this, and I'll pick a movie.
Speaker 2 (07:03):
Watch don't want to watch that movie. You know what
I'm saying, you direct, Okay, so that's what I want
to hear also sometimes but yeah.
Speaker 1 (07:09):
You like a direct Okay, all right, there you go.
Thank you, Liam, I appreciate you. We're in the midst
of just testing out new theories in twenty twenty five
on Tiff in the Morning. In the meantime, we're still
commercial free and we're not far off from the three.
Speaker 2 (07:22):
Things you need to know to get your day started.
And since you don't go far
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