May 24, 2025 • 10 mins
On this episode of Our American Stories, when Lanae Strovers was tasked with deciding what to do with unclaimed urns at the funeral home where she worked, she took it personally, which makes sense for someone who entered the mortuary business for deeply personal reasons. Here's Lanae with her story of devotion and dedication to America’s fallen veterans.
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:10):
And we returned to our American stories. Up next a
story out of des Moines, Iowa, from our great affiliate
News Radio ten forty who when Renee Strovers was given
the job of figuring out what to do with unclaimed
urns at the funeral home she worked at, some of
(00:30):
which belonged to veterans, she took it personally that that
would make sense for someone who got into the mortuary
business for personal reasons. Let's get into the story. Here's lonee.
Speaker 2 (00:46):
When I was twenty one, I had a very very
good friend who died and I went to his funeral.
Speaker 3 (00:55):
And it was horrible.
Speaker 2 (00:56):
It had absolutely nothing to do with him. It wasn't
personalized at all. It wasn't a celebration of his life,
which was an amazing life. It was just very bland,
and I was so frustrated that the person who was
in charge of making this last chapter of his life
(01:21):
important didn't.
Speaker 3 (01:23):
I knew in that moment.
Speaker 2 (01:25):
That it was what I was supposed to do, there
was no questioning, and I went home and sat on
my couch and signed up for classes and went back
to school that monday. I was twenty five, single mom,
working two jobs, and that was terrifying. You can watch
(01:48):
as many movies or read up as much as you want,
but when you walk into that embalming suite for the
first time and there is a body laying on the
table for for me, it was very humbling because that
was a person, someone's son, and the work that I
was going to do is what was going to give
(02:10):
that family their final viewing.
Speaker 3 (02:14):
When I was given the project.
Speaker 2 (02:16):
To start reconnecting these earns that had been left behind,
I started with three months of bed rest. If I
wasn't able to walk, and I am not a person
that sits still very easily, and I was terrified. I
was worried about my mental health for being on bed
(02:38):
rest that long. I was worried about my husband's health
for dealing with me for that long on bed rest,
my kids, my family, and so I had asked my employer,
please please please.
Speaker 3 (02:52):
Give me a project to work on.
Speaker 2 (02:54):
I thought it would be like stuffing envelopes for mailings,
or editing open tuaries from home, or just literally anything
begged for a project. So our owner, who is Sasha,
she gave me a huge yellow envelope saying we have
a lot of urns that are still in our care.
(03:15):
They've either never been picked up or for whatever reason,
the family.
Speaker 3 (03:20):
It just has never contacted us.
Speaker 2 (03:22):
Some of these people died that had guardians and we
just weren't sure what the next step was. And she goes,
if you can start calling some of these people and
just gently remind them to come and pick up their
loved one, that would be great. I knew that we
had urns. We always have quite a few earns because
we're a very large funeral home, but I didn't know
(03:43):
to the extent how many had been there for so long.
And at this point, I've worked for the funeral home
for about eight years and had no idea. Some of
the urns that we have in our care the person
died in like nineteen ninety five, some from the early
two thousands, so people who died twenty thirty some years
(04:06):
ago were still literally sitting on our shelves and there
wasn't many notes or anything about it.
Speaker 3 (04:13):
They just were still there. So I just started calling.
Speaker 2 (04:17):
And some of the times I call and they're like,
oh my gosh, I'm so sorry. I thought my brother
picked up mom, We'll be right down. And that was
a majority of the phone calls, like just the family
thought somebody else in the family had handled it. And
then I got some phone calls for people that just
they're like, I know, but I just don't feel comfortable
(04:39):
having my loved ones or not home and I don't
know what to do with them. And so at that
point with those people, we would walk through the option
of helping locate a cemetery space and doing that, and
then I started to realize we were getting a lot
of people that either there was no family left, family
(05:01):
that was left was very distant, and didn't want those earns.
At the same time that I was doing the research
for finding these earns, I was also doing twenty three
and Me and Ancestry to find my biological family. When
I was born, my biological mom was a college student
(05:25):
and she had not told her parents that she was pregnant.
She had not told anyone, and so when she went
to the hospital to have me, she left right away.
She did not want to tell anybody that she had
had a baby. And for me, even though obviously I
don't remember that, there's times where I agree for her
(05:49):
where I've lost someone that I've never known. So as
I was going through all of these earns, and looking
at these names and trying to find family.
Speaker 3 (06:00):
I kind of had a light bulb.
Speaker 2 (06:02):
Moment all of a sudden, in the middle of the night,
sitting in the hospital bed in my living room, it
occurred to me, any one of these people could be
my family. Any one of those people could be a
dad or a mom, or a brother, or an uncle
or an aunt or a cousin. And I felt that
(06:24):
if I was ever able to figure out who my
biological family was, and if I found out that one
of those people.
Speaker 3 (06:32):
Was a family member.
Speaker 2 (06:34):
Of mine, I wanted to make sure that I had
treated them with the respect that I would have if
I knew it was a family member of mine. And
so we came up with a concept of doing a
mass burial and giving those people that were in our
care for a long time that had no one to
claim them a respectful burial with a headstone and to
(06:56):
do a service. I just felt that they are my family.
They have to be. So when I was going through
one of the questions when you're visiting with a family
member of the person who died, is we ask was
your loved one A veteran and of this group of
about ninety Earns that we were going to do a
(07:16):
mass burial for three of them were veterans, and I
just felt that they should not be included in the
mass burial. If I had an uncle or a brother
or someone who had served in the military, I would
want somebody to have military honors for them. It was
very important for me because the honors are not only
(07:40):
just for the veteran who served, but it's also spouses
and children served right along with the veteran. And when
that flag is given to the family, it's given to
them out of respect for you supported this veteran, you
were part of them, you were part of their service.
I just thought, well, we have access to Iowa Veteran
(08:00):
Cemetery here locally, which is one of the most incredible
and beautiful cemeteries ever, I think, And so I called
the cemetery Gina, who runs it over there.
Speaker 3 (08:12):
I said, I have a crazy idea.
Speaker 2 (08:15):
I have three veterans that have no family. I can't
find any contact for them. What do you think if
we held a little service out there for these men,
and we'll just invite the local legions, VFW, Patriot Guard,
CVMA guys. Just hopefully a few people will show up.
To pay respects to these guys, and she was like,
(08:38):
I love it. Whatever you need, I'll support you. That
sounds perfect, So I said okay. And I was expecting
maybe twenty to thirty people to attend. We had three hundred.
It was just one of those moments that very surreal.
Pictures videos do not do it justice. All these people
(08:58):
were coming out of their day to respect these three
men that they never met ever, just out of respect
for our country. As the years progressed, we started getting
phone calls from local law enforcement if they found an
earn in different places we hadn't earned. That was actually
found in the middle of an intersection. It had gotten
(09:20):
thrown out of a car after house was robbed. I
actually just recently got a phone call last week of
a veteran who was found He had passed away, his
wife had passed away. They had no children, no other family.
And there was a broker basically who was charged from
the lawyer to clean this house out, get everything going,
and he sat with his flag next to him. There's
(09:43):
no one else left. So he was returned to us
and said, I know what you do. Please make sure
this man gets buried with honors. So they've kind of.
Speaker 3 (09:52):
Started coming from all over.
Speaker 2 (09:54):
I hope it's something eventually we never have to do again,
because that would mean that there's nobody ever left done claimed.
But while that is still happening, and unfortunately, I think
it's going to happen more and more.
Speaker 3 (10:07):
It's just something you have to go to. It's so humbling.
Speaker 1 (10:12):
And a terrific job on the production, editing and storytelling
by our own Monte Montgomery. A special thanks to Simon
Conway for putting us onto this story. A terrific host
at WHO in Des Moines, and a special thanks to
Linei's Strovers and what a heart this lady has. And
this is the entrepreneurial part of this country in which
(10:33):
people don't start businesses, they just get stuff done, and
they do it for the right reason. The story of
Linnai Strovers and how she honors not only unclaimed earns,
but unclaimed earns of veterans here on our American Stories
And we returned to our American stories. Up next a
story out of des Moines, Iowa, from our great affiliate
News Radio ten forty who when Renee Strovers was given
the job of figuring out what to do with unclaimed
urns at the funeral home she worked at, some of
(00:30):
which belonged to veterans, she took it personally that that
would make sense for someone who got into the mortuary
business for personal reasons. Let's get into the story. Here's lonee.
Speaker 2 (00:46):
When I was twenty one, I had a very very
good friend who died and I went to his funeral.
Speaker 3 (00:55):
And it was horrible.
Speaker 2 (00:56):
It had absolutely nothing to do with him. It wasn't
personalized at all. It wasn't a celebration of his life,
which was an amazing life. It was just very bland,
and I was so frustrated that the person who was
in charge of making this last chapter of his life
(01:21):
important didn't.
Speaker 3 (01:23):
I knew in that moment.
Speaker 2 (01:25):
That it was what I was supposed to do, there
was no questioning, and I went home and sat on
my couch and signed up for classes and went back
to school that monday. I was twenty five, single mom,
working two jobs, and that was terrifying. You can watch
(01:48):
as many movies or read up as much as you want,
but when you walk into that embalming suite for the
first time and there is a body laying on the
table for for me, it was very humbling because that
was a person, someone's son, and the work that I
was going to do is what was going to give
(02:10):
that family their final viewing.
Speaker 3 (02:14):
When I was given the project.
Speaker 2 (02:16):
To start reconnecting these earns that had been left behind,
I started with three months of bed rest. If I
wasn't able to walk, and I am not a person
that sits still very easily, and I was terrified. I
was worried about my mental health for being on bed
(02:38):
rest that long. I was worried about my husband's health
for dealing with me for that long on bed rest,
my kids, my family, and so I had asked my employer,
please please please.
Speaker 3 (02:52):
Give me a project to work on.
Speaker 2 (02:54):
I thought it would be like stuffing envelopes for mailings,
or editing open tuaries from home, or just literally anything
begged for a project. So our owner, who is Sasha,
she gave me a huge yellow envelope saying we have
a lot of urns that are still in our care.
(03:15):
They've either never been picked up or for whatever reason,
the family.
Speaker 3 (03:20):
It just has never contacted us.
Speaker 2 (03:22):
Some of these people died that had guardians and we
just weren't sure what the next step was. And she goes,
if you can start calling some of these people and
just gently remind them to come and pick up their
loved one, that would be great. I knew that we
had urns. We always have quite a few earns because
we're a very large funeral home, but I didn't know
(03:43):
to the extent how many had been there for so long.
And at this point, I've worked for the funeral home
for about eight years and had no idea. Some of
the urns that we have in our care the person
died in like nineteen ninety five, some from the early
two thousands, so people who died twenty thirty some years
(04:06):
ago were still literally sitting on our shelves and there
wasn't many notes or anything about it.
Speaker 3 (04:13):
They just were still there. So I just started calling.
Speaker 2 (04:17):
And some of the times I call and they're like,
oh my gosh, I'm so sorry. I thought my brother
picked up mom, We'll be right down. And that was
a majority of the phone calls, like just the family
thought somebody else in the family had handled it. And
then I got some phone calls for people that just
they're like, I know, but I just don't feel comfortable
(04:39):
having my loved ones or not home and I don't
know what to do with them. And so at that
point with those people, we would walk through the option
of helping locate a cemetery space and doing that, and
then I started to realize we were getting a lot
of people that either there was no family left, family
(05:01):
that was left was very distant, and didn't want those earns.
At the same time that I was doing the research
for finding these earns, I was also doing twenty three
and Me and Ancestry to find my biological family. When
I was born, my biological mom was a college student
(05:25):
and she had not told her parents that she was pregnant.
She had not told anyone, and so when she went
to the hospital to have me, she left right away.
She did not want to tell anybody that she had
had a baby. And for me, even though obviously I
don't remember that, there's times where I agree for her
(05:49):
where I've lost someone that I've never known. So as
I was going through all of these earns, and looking
at these names and trying to find family.
Speaker 3 (06:00):
I kind of had a light bulb.
Speaker 2 (06:02):
Moment all of a sudden, in the middle of the night,
sitting in the hospital bed in my living room, it
occurred to me, any one of these people could be
my family. Any one of those people could be a
dad or a mom, or a brother, or an uncle
or an aunt or a cousin. And I felt that
(06:24):
if I was ever able to figure out who my
biological family was, and if I found out that one
of those people.
Speaker 3 (06:32):
Was a family member.
Speaker 2 (06:34):
Of mine, I wanted to make sure that I had
treated them with the respect that I would have if
I knew it was a family member of mine. And
so we came up with a concept of doing a
mass burial and giving those people that were in our
care for a long time that had no one to
claim them a respectful burial with a headstone and to
(06:56):
do a service. I just felt that they are my family.
They have to be. So when I was going through
one of the questions when you're visiting with a family
member of the person who died, is we ask was
your loved one A veteran and of this group of
about ninety Earns that we were going to do a
(07:16):
mass burial for three of them were veterans, and I
just felt that they should not be included in the
mass burial. If I had an uncle or a brother
or someone who had served in the military, I would
want somebody to have military honors for them. It was
very important for me because the honors are not only
(07:40):
just for the veteran who served, but it's also spouses
and children served right along with the veteran. And when
that flag is given to the family, it's given to
them out of respect for you supported this veteran, you
were part of them, you were part of their service.
I just thought, well, we have access to Iowa Veteran
(08:00):
Cemetery here locally, which is one of the most incredible
and beautiful cemeteries ever, I think, And so I called
the cemetery Gina, who runs it over there.
Speaker 3 (08:12):
I said, I have a crazy idea.
Speaker 2 (08:15):
I have three veterans that have no family. I can't
find any contact for them. What do you think if
we held a little service out there for these men,
and we'll just invite the local legions, VFW, Patriot Guard,
CVMA guys. Just hopefully a few people will show up.
To pay respects to these guys, and she was like,
(08:38):
I love it. Whatever you need, I'll support you. That
sounds perfect, So I said okay. And I was expecting
maybe twenty to thirty people to attend. We had three hundred.
It was just one of those moments that very surreal.
Pictures videos do not do it justice. All these people
(08:58):
were coming out of their day to respect these three
men that they never met ever, just out of respect
for our country. As the years progressed, we started getting
phone calls from local law enforcement if they found an
earn in different places we hadn't earned. That was actually
found in the middle of an intersection. It had gotten
(09:20):
thrown out of a car after house was robbed. I
actually just recently got a phone call last week of
a veteran who was found He had passed away, his
wife had passed away. They had no children, no other family.
And there was a broker basically who was charged from
the lawyer to clean this house out, get everything going,
and he sat with his flag next to him. There's
(09:43):
no one else left. So he was returned to us
and said, I know what you do. Please make sure
this man gets buried with honors. So they've kind of.
Speaker 3 (09:52):
Started coming from all over.
Speaker 2 (09:54):
I hope it's something eventually we never have to do again,
because that would mean that there's nobody ever left done claimed.
But while that is still happening, and unfortunately, I think
it's going to happen more and more.
Speaker 3 (10:07):
It's just something you have to go to. It's so humbling.
Speaker 1 (10:12):
And a terrific job on the production, editing and storytelling
by our own Monte Montgomery. A special thanks to Simon
Conway for putting us onto this story. A terrific host
at WHO in Des Moines, and a special thanks to
Linei's Strovers and what a heart this lady has. And
this is the entrepreneurial part of this country in which
(10:33):
people don't start businesses, they just get stuff done, and
they do it for the right reason. The story of
Linnai Strovers and how she honors not only unclaimed earns,
but unclaimed earns of veterans here on our American Stories
Host
Lee Habeeb
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