Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:00):
It's another jewbile phone frame Mornings on the twenties.
Speaker 2 (00:10):
Hello, Hey, this is Pee Deekins calling from departments. Is
this Kelly?
Speaker 1 (00:16):
Yeah, this is Kelly. Hey, Kelly, move in day. Excited
to have you.
Speaker 2 (00:22):
Yeah, yeah, Hey, listen, I'm calling with a little bit
of news on your place.
Speaker 1 (00:28):
Okay, okay, and uh, not a big deal. I just
want you to be prepared, okay. Uh, so you're moving
in today.
Speaker 2 (00:38):
I know your appointment to move stuff in is a
little later, and it looks like for an undetermined amount
of time you are going to have a roommate in
your extra room there.
Speaker 1 (00:50):
What do you mean a roommate?
Speaker 2 (00:52):
I mean, well, I don't know if you've ever had
a roommate before, but roommates usually if you live in
a place and then there's someone else that lives there
as well.
Speaker 1 (00:59):
Yeah, I know, roommate is why are you saying I
have a roommate because I bought apartment to not have
a roommate. Yeah, so that was the plan.
Speaker 2 (01:13):
But realized this morning that one of our favorite Kookie
characters from the neighborhood has sort of decided to set
up shop in your apartment that you're moving into. His
name is Johnny and call him Crazy Johnny around here.
Speaker 1 (01:26):
I'm sorry, you're telling me that I have a squatter
living in my apartment right now, es saying the apartment
I'm moving into today.
Speaker 2 (01:35):
Yes, And I tried to ask him when he was
going to be leaving and he said some things in
gibberish and spat at me, so I didn't get a
chance to really talk to him.
Speaker 1 (01:46):
Are you kidding me?
Speaker 2 (01:47):
Like?
Speaker 1 (01:48):
What are you running at halfway house right now? I'm sorry? Like,
why is he in my house? Right You have to.
Speaker 2 (01:54):
Get him out of it, if you could lower your voice,
because I don't want I don't know if Crazy Johnny's listening,
and I don't really want to make him upset.
Speaker 1 (01:59):
But hey, everything is good to go. And you've got
to be kidding me right now? Why aren't you calling
the police? Oh? Well, we well because we like him.
Speaker 2 (02:09):
You know, he's a nice guy at times, and you're
kidding me.
Speaker 1 (02:13):
He might be a nice guy to you. This guy
is not living in my apartment. I swear to God,
you better be out of there before I am there.
You haven't heard the best part. I'm sorry, the best part,
Like I this is unbelievable. What is going on?
Speaker 2 (02:32):
We are prepared to offer you ten percent off your
first month's rent if you'll just, you know, take in
Crazy Johnny for just a little while until we figure
out how to get him out of your place.
Speaker 1 (02:42):
Ten percent off. I would get half that if I
had a roommate.
Speaker 2 (02:47):
You want me to room with a.
Speaker 1 (02:48):
Guy named Crazy Johnny? Crazy Johnny and the Ferrets? Yeah,
that's Crazy Johnny. What his ferrets?
Speaker 2 (02:57):
Yeah, he has a ferret band. Actually, it's pretty interesting
that he's taught up to.
Speaker 1 (03:03):
What this has got to be. What are you hitting me?
It's really kind of cool. He taught one of his
ferreits how to play the drums. Actually, I mean, are
you what? I don't even understand what's happening right now.
I am not moving into an apartment with a guy
named Crazy Johnny with a ferret band living in my apartment.
(03:26):
I did not sign up for this, and I absolutely
am going to be calling the cops on you guys
if he is not out right now.
Speaker 2 (03:33):
To be fair, the Ferret band does have a curfew
of ten and Crazy Johnny has never missed it. He
always gets him off the drums, at least by nine
forty five.
Speaker 1 (03:41):
This is unbelievable. I swear to God, I am calling.
I am calling the cops on you. I can't Kelly
and not be legal.
Speaker 2 (03:51):
Kelly, this is actually Jubil from the Jubil Show doing
a phone frank on you and your boyfriend.
Speaker 1 (03:54):
Jake set you up.
Speaker 2 (04:00):
He said, you guys are moving in together and wanted
to mess with you on your moving day.
Speaker 1 (04:05):
I swore to God, I'm gonna kill him. What Okay,
well now I have to get back at him. I see.
I can't deal with it now, wake up every morning
with Jubile phone franks