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July 6, 2021 7 mins

There is a new mobile service. The newest way to become whole again is to be baptized in your own front yard.

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Episode Transcript

Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
All right, nephew, what you got time for the prank
phone call Shirley. It's time to baptize some people. It's
called mobile baptismal pool mobile baptism and we come to
you and you can be ignorant. You do, come to
your house and baptize. That's what we do. Hit it. Hello, Hello,

(00:24):
I'm trying to reach a Mr. Wilson. How you do?
How you doing? My name is brother spring water Man. Listen,
we uh we we we got paid to actually come
by and do some services to for for you by
some friends of yours, and we wanted to actually call
and see about scheduling and see what you had available. Uh,

(00:45):
some some services. What y'all playing on cnsin grad What
you do? What kind of services you had? Actually, sir,
You've got some friends that have actually spent a great
amount of money on you. And what we do is
UM we have a baptismal own Wheels service. And what
we do is we go and we um we baptize

(01:06):
people at their home. And Baptismal Wheels has been is
a new UM company. But we've we've baptized over a
thousand people. Now we have a truck with it which
actually has a baptismal pool on the back of it,
and we actually come to your home and we will
baptize you in your driveway and and make you hold again.

(01:27):
So we've hostess brother Water again. I'm sorry, i't water springwater.
What you want to come to my house and give
me a baptism in my front yard? We want to
baptize you right there in your drive where your friends
are paid for the services. And my friend, what friend
will pay for me to get baptized? I think baptized
are already well from my understanding, sir that but then

(01:49):
that you you've had some some bumps and bruises and
and and they seem to uh to believe that you
need to be Washington coming. I mean, that's all good,
that's all that's it's all good. I mean things are
I mean think that matter that it made? Man. I mean,
I've been baptized, I go to church. You know, uh,
me and the Lord don't have no problems. I mean,
we all have setbacks. But for you to pull up

(02:10):
with your pool in front of my house to say
you've can a baptize me, that that doesn't make any
sense to me. Doctor. I mean succeeds sometimes when some
people are not able to go to the House of
the Lord and get baptized. You know, we're making a
lot more convenient for you, but we can actually need
no convenience. I don't need no convenience. What I need
convenience for you asking me to come to my house

(02:33):
on a Tuesday to baptize me in my drawway? Does
that make any sense to you? Brother water? I mean,
come on, if you really sit back and think about it,
does that make any sense to you? First of all,
so that that's that's that's brother spring water. But what
I'm trying to what I'm trying to say, the water
is holy water, spring water. It doesn't make no difference

(02:56):
to me. You can't come to my neighborhood and baptize
me in front of mine, Sir, What is all that
I ain't bo This is this is what your friends
are talking about that don't give me them what my
prayers are telling you, man and anybody which which one
of my friends gonna work to me and you to
come to my damn out. So I know that and
if I don't let me that, you don't even make

(03:17):
any sense to me. You understand so I'm not I'm
not at any liberty to tell you who actually uh
between the liberty because of my damn house that baptized me.
But you can't tell me who the hell I gonna
see you, but you're not there. What may come? All?
You don't even call that that makes sense for you.
Go come on, that doesn't make any no way in
the world. I'm gonna allow you to come and bring
your phone in front of my house and baptize me.

(03:40):
Then I'm asking you ask as you supposed to be
a pastor, you supposed to be baptized. I'm asking you, Okay,
what's a friend of mine is tending you that you know,
letting you know I need to be done? You'll tell
you at that liberty to all I want to know. Basically,
I've already been paid. I'm I'm coming. I'm not tizing
me them baptime. I'm going to baptize you on Tuesday

(04:02):
in your driveway. Man, I'll tell you what did you
come to my house in front of my driver? You
better bring the old congregation, you understand, you better bring
the beacons, the brothers, the sisters, and they're in my head.
If you think I'm gonna got tired of the problem.
This is what your friends are talking about. This is
why you need to be baptized and cleans it again
and washed in the blood of the lambs. This is

(04:23):
what's wrong. You need to be cleansed. That's what's wrong
with you. Mr Wilton, what's wrong with me? Now? What's
wrong with you? Is called in and let him out. Hope.
They're telling me I need to be that high in
front of my house if I need to be backtamp.
Don't get some only water, I go down to the church.
I don't need you come in front of my house
as we are. You afraid of some white sheets calling
my winter bats athlete? That my mom understanding, for my understanding,

(04:46):
for my understanding. Mr Wilson, you missed two Sunday is
already this month sunning this man. I can't go anywhere
and get the one. I don't need you coming head
because you tell him I missed two damn Sunday. I
don't miss that sing too, because the fun I ain't
coming off. Sure. All I know is I've been paid
to do a job. I will be there Tuesday morning
at seven o'clock and we will baptize you before you

(05:08):
go to work on two, before you will I tell
you what you curning my seven o'clock and morning, I
swell on your lord, I'm gonna bust you. You understand me.
You were not curing my house, turning me. You would
have got tip dow. I don't give a dam who
paid you. You understand I was trying your in awards. Man,
have stopping out bringing you your teachers, everybody. We're gonna

(05:29):
don't fool party of that. You understand. I get all
of this anger and all of this that these problems
you have within you. We are going to purge your
body and get it out your system. I don't want
your pleas to me. I tell you, I tell you
what brother spring water. That's a brother, bring water on it.
You're gonna get baptis on Tuesday morning. I don't give

(05:50):
a dam who pays you, who called you, bring you?
I'm gonna I care to kill you. I'm gonna trying
y'all safe. I got one more thing I want to
say to you when you live. You gotta's matter I'm
missing you ain't got to say to me. I gotta
go understand you ain't man, I want to say to
you as you listening to me, whatnot. This is nephew
Tommy from the Steve Harby Morning Show. You just got

(06:14):
pranked by your boy Mason. Hello, man, let me check
your something. Man, let me tell you something. Boy, y'all,
y'all was boy bred, so man, I s head. Man,
I was about to act a fool on y'all because
y'all would have showed it by crib. You're staying me, y'all.

(06:37):
Ain't got just letter to do. Didn't sit around here
and just with people during their day. Man, I ain't
never thought y'all could give me with this the who
the hell goes around that kids of people? Alwa, that's
like meddles A will baptized people with a pull on
the back that you want fifty I got. I ask

(07:00):
you something. What is the baddest radio show in the land? Man?
You know it's the Steve Harvey Morning the Show. See,
that's how you baptize forget going to church. Now exactly
when they don't make it to the church. You know,
we bring the baptismal to you. That's actually a good idea.

(07:22):
And we're in the driving away. Yeah, we're baptized. You
go to work in the morning, Yeah, and get get
your save on. We get to save on right there.
We cleanse you right there in the driveway. We won't
to do it. Money will, and will he won't. You're
listening to the Steve Harvey Morning Show.
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Host

Thomas "Nephew Tommy" Miles

Thomas "Nephew Tommy" Miles

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