October 9, 2025 • 14 mins
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Speaker 1 (00:03):
Mo Joe in the morning.
Speaker 2 (00:03):
Obviously, listening to War the Roses doesn't always seem like
something very comfortable to listen to when you're listening to
people and their personal lives. This last one seemed even
more uncomfortable to me, hearing the pain in a wife's voice,
but also the pain in a husband's voice too. I mean,
(00:24):
I know that there's gonna be people that are gonna
say that this guy is a narcissist or he's like
an evil human being. This guy and her went into
a relationship twenty years ago, they say, and now it
has gotten to a point where they're both living in
separate rooms and he feels like he has to put
a lock on his door. And it makes me sad
(00:44):
when I hear him say, well, then let's go to counseling,
and she's like that, you know, we've gone past that point,
and he's like it beats the alternative. I mean, having
been a guy who has been in a relationship for many,
many years where we've gotten to a point where we've
almost walked away from the relationship and gotten divorced, this
(01:07):
is tough, man.
Speaker 1 (01:07):
I will say this to you.
Speaker 2 (01:08):
If you're not married right now, don't because it's the
hardest thing you'll ever do. Do it if you want
the best thing you can ever have. Because when it's good,
it is great. When it is not good, it is awful.
Speaker 3 (01:21):
And yeah, yeah, right, so it is hard, very hard.
Speaker 2 (01:25):
Let let's now listen to listeners comments on this, and
then let's also see what we can do to help
these two guys out. Because I'll be honest with you,
Mindy and Lewis to me are in my prayers today.
Speaker 1 (01:37):
This is not a great situation. Katie, what's up?
Speaker 4 (01:41):
Good morning. Yeah, I just kind of wanted to finish
Kev's statement and his hidden word that he didn't say
that starts with a big D when he.
Speaker 5 (01:48):
Said hang out in your room like a blank.
Speaker 4 (01:53):
Because I don't. I mean, yeah, I get your heartfelt
sentiments that you were saying, but.
Speaker 5 (01:58):
Still you don't step up.
Speaker 4 (02:00):
If you're working on something, you don't step out finish
it first.
Speaker 2 (02:05):
If he needs a different relationship, let me ask you,
do you have any sympathy for him?
Speaker 4 (02:13):
So a little bit in the fact that he said
that he wanted counseling, but we also didn't hear if
they had actually tried counseling. Or not and hiding away.
It's the smallest, like, it's not mentionable sympathy that.
Speaker 2 (02:31):
You know, there are three sides to every story, right
there's you know, one side from her, one side from him,
and then there's probably the truth somewhere in the middle
a little bit. And I hear when they're going back
and forth and they're going, you know, at each other.
I hear these two people that, man, they have a
(02:52):
lot of years of baggage. And I will give a
little credit if I can. He stayed there, and he
took a brunt of the beating from her yelling and
being upset.
Speaker 6 (03:04):
And.
Speaker 2 (03:06):
He didn't coward his way away from it. Because the
majority of these guys that we bust and and they
are caught cheating, they cowered their way and they don't
you know, stay and hear from from us.
Speaker 1 (03:18):
Some people would say, well, he did, I agree with you.
Speaker 2 (03:24):
He did coward away when he went in the room,
but he at least was talking about what's going on.
Speaker 7 (03:28):
I just don't know how you yell the therapy card
after you lock yourself in a room and you go cheat.
Speaker 1 (03:32):
Yeah, well, do you allow forgiveness at all?
Speaker 7 (03:37):
And any of that absolutely but I do think there's
a there's a point in time where separationist wasn't necessary.
And again, I don't know if you have a leg
to stand on after your cheating and you lock yourself
in a room and then you say, oh, well we
need therapy, Like no, you need to stop cheating and
come out the room, and then that's how you go
to therapy. You don't go into therapy by locking yourself
(03:58):
in a room. And what do you think it's Mojo
on the morning, wore the roses.
Speaker 8 (04:03):
Hey, good morning everybody, first time a lot of time. Yeah, honestly,
I'm heartbroken too for this couple.
Speaker 9 (04:13):
You hit it right on the money and when I'm
happily married for two years and when it's great, it's
freaking amazing. But yeah, lots of pain in that marriage
for twenty years and it's hard to like throw it
away essentially. But you can just hear the devastation in
between both of them, and keav Man coming.
Speaker 1 (04:33):
With the directness.
Speaker 8 (04:34):
I wish we were able to get a little bit
more out of him, but yeah, man, just locking it in.
Speaker 9 (04:40):
I agree, like it's a baby move at that point.
Speaker 2 (04:45):
But yeah, hey, my thoughts, Kayden, I will give you
a piece of advice from an old married guy. The
going into the separate rooms is good for a brief
period of time.
Speaker 1 (04:54):
Don't do it for a long time. It's not good.
Speaker 9 (04:59):
Oh, read absolutely, And I.
Speaker 2 (05:01):
Think sometimes people sometimes people will use the I can't
sleep or they get up early, or they snore, or
you know, they fart, which I was doing last night.
Speaker 1 (05:11):
They'll use that. They'll use that as the excuse.
Speaker 2 (05:13):
But I think that there has to be a little
bit of an understanding of why you're doing it. And
I the whole putting the lock on the door, it's
a total pussy move on his.
Speaker 1 (05:23):
Part, you know what I mean?
Speaker 2 (05:24):
And it's honestly, it's it's you know, they talk about
people being passive aggressive. To me, what he was doing
was basically sending her a sign that he didn't want
her part of his life.
Speaker 1 (05:35):
You know, he might as well just move down the house.
Speaker 3 (05:37):
Passive agress. That's aggressive to me.
Speaker 2 (05:39):
Yeah, I mean, there's there's no reason why you do that. Adrian, Hi, Hi,
what'd you want to say?
Speaker 5 (05:46):
Yeah? So, I, for one, I agree that this is
a kind of a tragic were the roses today? And
I've been with my husband for about a decade now,
and you're right, it's not it's not always easy. It is,
but honestly, my comment and a previous coller just touched
on it. I feel like we could get so much
more out of certain out of some of the users
(06:07):
if keV wasn't quite so combative and that I get it.
Speaker 6 (06:10):
keV.
Speaker 5 (06:10):
I love that you're passionate, but sometimes he's gonna take it.
Speaker 10 (06:15):
Take it back a little.
Speaker 7 (06:16):
Bit, please, I said one line, my one line about
locking in the room was too much.
Speaker 5 (06:20):
You think it was a I think something about like
a little last teenager.
Speaker 10 (06:26):
I think that's what was it?
Speaker 2 (06:27):
Okay, a little bit, yeah, got you? I don't mean listen.
And that was at the end of a conversation. I
don't think that Kev's line is the reason why he
hung up, even though it did happen after he said that.
Speaker 1 (06:40):
I think this guy just had enough.
Speaker 2 (06:41):
Yeah so, and I think keV was saying what a
lot of people were thinking. So, Douglas, what's going on?
Speaker 6 (06:49):
Hi? Hello?
Speaker 10 (06:51):
No, that's first of all, not down Kevin for being
the only one that could stand up for somebody that's
just caught cheating from a twenty year relationship. So gokev
all the way. I think that regardless of being in
a relationship and trying to work things out, if you
are acting like a teenager and locking yourself in a
room and making somebody that you've been in a relationship
(07:14):
with for so long feel like you have a power
or authority over, then you're counseling was just an excuse.
Speaker 2 (07:22):
Interesting interesting points, Douglas, Where do you come from?
Speaker 1 (07:25):
Do you come from? Are you in a relationship?
Speaker 10 (07:28):
Yeah? I have my fiance seven years, then we've got
a family, we're growing, and it's just something that at
that moment you want to confide more into that person.
If you're actually there for counseling, you're not going to
use it the first second you get caught. You want
to use that as a Oh no, let me not
put a lock on my door. Let me feel like
I can actually come to this person even though you
(07:49):
don't want to. Hey, there's so many times in a
relationship you don't want to be with that person that's
right across the table, and that's the person that those
are the times you have to be a couple.
Speaker 1 (07:58):
Hey, before you get married.
Speaker 2 (08:00):
You know what, one of the best things I would
recommend is and nobody recommended it to me. I've told
Joe my son, that before you get married, go to
a counselor and ask him how you should fight, Like,
how do you how do you fight in a relationship
because one of the things is we we always figure
out what to do after we fought. We never figured
out how to do it before we are fighting. And
(08:22):
it's the conversations that you know, need to come up,
I think in pre marital counseling, which a lot of
people I think tend to not do. I know that
sometimes they'll do it just because the whatever church or
whatever place you're going to get married at well will
require you to get a couple of classes. But it's
honestly something I think you should go ongoing with and
not be afraid of.
Speaker 3 (08:41):
Even if you're like, well, we don't even really fight
right now, you will, you absolutely will.
Speaker 2 (08:46):
And honestly, the first couple are sometimes the worst because
you're not ready for it, you know, and you let
up a lot of you know, built up anger from
something that might have come years ago while you were
just dating. Kelly wants to come wore are the roses?
Speaker 11 (09:02):
Yeah, So I was kind of in the same similar situation.
I was married for a long time and my husband
had stepped out of the marriage.
Speaker 5 (09:11):
Not saying that it's wrong.
Speaker 11 (09:13):
Completely or I'm not saying that it's right, it is
definitely wrong to step out of the marriage, but I.
Speaker 4 (09:18):
Will say that it's really hard.
Speaker 11 (09:21):
I kind of want to defend him because it's really hard.
It sounded like he really wanted her attention and she's
just not giving it to him. And it's really hard
to sometimes have that open heart if somebody isn't doing
the same to you. So I don't want to say
again that what he did was right, but it's really
(09:41):
hard to love somebody who doesn't love you back that
at least it doesn't feel like it. You have to
give every relationship one hundred percent. Everybody says, no, you
got to get fifty to fifty to make a hundred.
Speaker 5 (09:53):
No, I'm not going to give you half of me.
Speaker 4 (09:55):
I give you all of me.
Speaker 5 (09:56):
There's one hundred one hundred.
Speaker 12 (09:58):
So some maybe he's just not feeling like she's giving
him the attention. He did say, you know you don't
you don't pay attention to me, and he did mention
it was a long time since they you know, had
been you know, together, you know, romantically, and sometimes for
people that's their relationship, that's how they talk, that's their relationship,
that's how they want to, you know, show.
Speaker 6 (10:18):
Their love to some people.
Speaker 11 (10:20):
And it's just I don't know, I just feel like
he's just not being seen by her.
Speaker 5 (10:24):
And again not saying that it was right to step
out of the relationship.
Speaker 11 (10:27):
He should have brought it to her attention, but she
also should have taken that in consideration.
Speaker 2 (10:32):
Yeah, and again I don't want to come down on
her because I know it seems like we're swaying where
we're you know, giving this guy forgiveness. There's no forgiveness
on what he's doing. He's got to get her forgiveness.
That's the biggest thing he's going to have to try
to work towards. But but you know, you bring up
a very interesting point of fair Yeah, fair point.
Speaker 1 (10:50):
What's going on, Steve Hi.
Speaker 6 (10:53):
I don't know.
Speaker 1 (10:54):
He guys doing with Flora and my name doing great?
Steve wore the roses. What's your comment?
Speaker 6 (10:59):
Oh, yeah, I tested them. This one kind of hits
close to home for me. I went through the same,
almost the exact same situation as the two of these are.
But I've only been with my wife for about thirteen years.
But we got to the points of where we were
in separate veteroms. Believe it or not, I actually put
a lock on my door. Wow, I put a lock
on I put a lock on my door because at
(11:19):
the time we were not me and my wife, we're
not intimate. For over a year, she was doing the yelling,
telling me what to do things like she commented on
it with his wife, and it got to the points
to where I didn't want to deal with it anymore.
So I locked myself there and so she could get
in there when I got home and worked, so it
was a way for me to separate for her coming
in there. It got to the points where I actually
(11:40):
cheated one that I worked with in the past. In
the end, she caught me. I thought we were done
to come to find out. Once she caught me, it
actually forced us to sit down and have an adult
conversation where we both realized that yes, I was completely
in the wrong for cheating and owned up to it. However,
she accepted the fact that she felt that she did
(12:04):
things as well to drive me away, to cause me
to go look for intimacy and you know, from from
another woman. And in the end we actually worked through it. Now, granted,
we still have issues from time to time where she'll
come to me and tell me she feels a certain
way and I have to show her that I'm not
doing anything, which is perfectly understandable. But in the end
(12:25):
we actually worked through it, and we're actually closer now
than we were when we first.
Speaker 1 (12:28):
Got to go.
Speaker 3 (12:29):
What a story. Thank you for sharing that story.
Speaker 6 (12:32):
There is hope, There is hope for them.
Speaker 2 (12:34):
Can I actually ask you one quick question going back
to the lock. Well, you say you put the lock
on there because you wanted a separation. You were cheating
at the time you put the lock on the door, right.
Speaker 6 (12:44):
Uh so at first believe it or not? At first no,
but it turned into that because once the lock was there,
she couldn't get to.
Speaker 2 (12:51):
Me because to me, to me, the idea that want
you don't want her to see suffer?
Speaker 1 (12:57):
Do it? What do you what do you not want
her to see? You know what I mean?
Speaker 6 (13:00):
Well, yeah, but it wasn't the fact that I didn't
want her to see anything. So like for example, in
my situation, you know, when you get to the point
of frustration, Right, You argue and you yell and you scream. Right, Well,
my wife is the type of person where when she
gets upset, she's very passionate, starts going off, and after
a while you start kind of feeling beat down, and
(13:21):
rather than have a front conference, you know, like a
front argument all the time, you're like, I'm just gonna
not deal with this and I'm just gonna lock my
door so that if you get mad, you can't even
come in here, and I can literally just ignore the
hear exists at this point. It's honestly the easiest way
to do it. But in turn, by doing that, you know,
caused the separation to be even more than eventually.
Speaker 1 (13:44):
Yeah, and I.
Speaker 7 (13:45):
Feel like oftentimes the lock is more symbolic than it
is a physical demonstration, Like the locking of it is
literally like you're locking your heart off to that person.
And when I think about locking it off, it's almost
like when you're in pain, the first thing you want
to do is get away from being in pain. Yeah,
you want to stop the bleeding, so to speak, but
(14:06):
the absence of pain isn't healing. And I think you
think that I'm healing something by locking the door, because
I don't get to hear the rah rah rah in
my face. But you're not being healed in this situation,
and it oftentimes like listening to him and in this
ward of roses is making things worse way quicker than
it's making things better.
Speaker 1 (14:24):
All Right, we'll get an update on this war of
the roses.
Speaker 2 (14:26):
I want to see how this couple is doing right
now after having this situation happen to them. So keep
listening to Mojo in the Morning, and if you missed it,
go check it out. It's on our podcast right now.
Speaker 1 (14:36):
The whole of the second date update. This is Mojo
in the Morning.
Mo Joe in the morning.
Speaker 2 (00:03):
Obviously, listening to War the Roses doesn't always seem like
something very comfortable to listen to when you're listening to
people and their personal lives. This last one seemed even
more uncomfortable to me, hearing the pain in a wife's voice,
but also the pain in a husband's voice too. I mean,
(00:24):
I know that there's gonna be people that are gonna
say that this guy is a narcissist or he's like
an evil human being. This guy and her went into
a relationship twenty years ago, they say, and now it
has gotten to a point where they're both living in
separate rooms and he feels like he has to put
a lock on his door. And it makes me sad
(00:44):
when I hear him say, well, then let's go to counseling,
and she's like that, you know, we've gone past that point,
and he's like it beats the alternative. I mean, having
been a guy who has been in a relationship for many,
many years where we've gotten to a point where we've
almost walked away from the relationship and gotten divorced, this
(01:07):
is tough, man.
Speaker 1 (01:07):
I will say this to you.
Speaker 2 (01:08):
If you're not married right now, don't because it's the
hardest thing you'll ever do. Do it if you want
the best thing you can ever have. Because when it's good,
it is great. When it is not good, it is awful.
Speaker 3 (01:21):
And yeah, yeah, right, so it is hard, very hard.
Speaker 2 (01:25):
Let let's now listen to listeners comments on this, and
then let's also see what we can do to help
these two guys out. Because I'll be honest with you,
Mindy and Lewis to me are in my prayers today.
Speaker 1 (01:37):
This is not a great situation. Katie, what's up?
Speaker 4 (01:41):
Good morning. Yeah, I just kind of wanted to finish
Kev's statement and his hidden word that he didn't say
that starts with a big D when he.
Speaker 5 (01:48):
Said hang out in your room like a blank.
Speaker 4 (01:53):
Because I don't. I mean, yeah, I get your heartfelt
sentiments that you were saying, but.
Speaker 5 (01:58):
Still you don't step up.
Speaker 4 (02:00):
If you're working on something, you don't step out finish
it first.
Speaker 2 (02:05):
If he needs a different relationship, let me ask you,
do you have any sympathy for him?
Speaker 4 (02:13):
So a little bit in the fact that he said
that he wanted counseling, but we also didn't hear if
they had actually tried counseling. Or not and hiding away.
It's the smallest, like, it's not mentionable sympathy that.
Speaker 2 (02:31):
You know, there are three sides to every story, right
there's you know, one side from her, one side from him,
and then there's probably the truth somewhere in the middle
a little bit. And I hear when they're going back
and forth and they're going, you know, at each other.
I hear these two people that, man, they have a
(02:52):
lot of years of baggage. And I will give a
little credit if I can. He stayed there, and he
took a brunt of the beating from her yelling and
being upset.
Speaker 6 (03:04):
And.
Speaker 2 (03:06):
He didn't coward his way away from it. Because the
majority of these guys that we bust and and they
are caught cheating, they cowered their way and they don't
you know, stay and hear from from us.
Speaker 1 (03:18):
Some people would say, well, he did, I agree with you.
Speaker 2 (03:24):
He did coward away when he went in the room,
but he at least was talking about what's going on.
Speaker 7 (03:28):
I just don't know how you yell the therapy card
after you lock yourself in a room and you go cheat.
Speaker 1 (03:32):
Yeah, well, do you allow forgiveness at all?
Speaker 7 (03:37):
And any of that absolutely but I do think there's
a there's a point in time where separationist wasn't necessary.
And again, I don't know if you have a leg
to stand on after your cheating and you lock yourself
in a room and then you say, oh, well we
need therapy, Like no, you need to stop cheating and
come out the room, and then that's how you go
to therapy. You don't go into therapy by locking yourself
(03:58):
in a room. And what do you think it's Mojo
on the morning, wore the roses.
Speaker 8 (04:03):
Hey, good morning everybody, first time a lot of time. Yeah, honestly,
I'm heartbroken too for this couple.
Speaker 9 (04:13):
You hit it right on the money and when I'm
happily married for two years and when it's great, it's
freaking amazing. But yeah, lots of pain in that marriage
for twenty years and it's hard to like throw it
away essentially. But you can just hear the devastation in
between both of them, and keav Man coming.
Speaker 1 (04:33):
With the directness.
Speaker 8 (04:34):
I wish we were able to get a little bit
more out of him, but yeah, man, just locking it in.
Speaker 9 (04:40):
I agree, like it's a baby move at that point.
Speaker 2 (04:45):
But yeah, hey, my thoughts, Kayden, I will give you
a piece of advice from an old married guy. The
going into the separate rooms is good for a brief
period of time.
Speaker 1 (04:54):
Don't do it for a long time. It's not good.
Speaker 9 (04:59):
Oh, read absolutely, And I.
Speaker 2 (05:01):
Think sometimes people sometimes people will use the I can't
sleep or they get up early, or they snore, or
you know, they fart, which I was doing last night.
Speaker 1 (05:11):
They'll use that. They'll use that as the excuse.
Speaker 2 (05:13):
But I think that there has to be a little
bit of an understanding of why you're doing it. And
I the whole putting the lock on the door, it's
a total pussy move on his.
Speaker 1 (05:23):
Part, you know what I mean?
Speaker 2 (05:24):
And it's honestly, it's it's you know, they talk about
people being passive aggressive. To me, what he was doing
was basically sending her a sign that he didn't want
her part of his life.
Speaker 1 (05:35):
You know, he might as well just move down the house.
Speaker 3 (05:37):
Passive agress. That's aggressive to me.
Speaker 2 (05:39):
Yeah, I mean, there's there's no reason why you do that. Adrian, Hi, Hi,
what'd you want to say?
Speaker 5 (05:46):
Yeah? So, I, for one, I agree that this is
a kind of a tragic were the roses today? And
I've been with my husband for about a decade now,
and you're right, it's not it's not always easy. It is,
but honestly, my comment and a previous coller just touched
on it. I feel like we could get so much
more out of certain out of some of the users
(06:07):
if keV wasn't quite so combative and that I get it.
Speaker 6 (06:10):
keV.
Speaker 5 (06:10):
I love that you're passionate, but sometimes he's gonna take it.
Speaker 10 (06:15):
Take it back a little.
Speaker 7 (06:16):
Bit, please, I said one line, my one line about
locking in the room was too much.
Speaker 5 (06:20):
You think it was a I think something about like
a little last teenager.
Speaker 10 (06:26):
I think that's what was it?
Speaker 2 (06:27):
Okay, a little bit, yeah, got you? I don't mean listen.
And that was at the end of a conversation. I
don't think that Kev's line is the reason why he
hung up, even though it did happen after he said that.
Speaker 1 (06:40):
I think this guy just had enough.
Speaker 2 (06:41):
Yeah so, and I think keV was saying what a
lot of people were thinking. So, Douglas, what's going on?
Speaker 6 (06:49):
Hi? Hello?
Speaker 10 (06:51):
No, that's first of all, not down Kevin for being
the only one that could stand up for somebody that's
just caught cheating from a twenty year relationship. So gokev
all the way. I think that regardless of being in
a relationship and trying to work things out, if you
are acting like a teenager and locking yourself in a
room and making somebody that you've been in a relationship
(07:14):
with for so long feel like you have a power
or authority over, then you're counseling was just an excuse.
Speaker 2 (07:22):
Interesting interesting points, Douglas, Where do you come from?
Speaker 1 (07:25):
Do you come from? Are you in a relationship?
Speaker 10 (07:28):
Yeah? I have my fiance seven years, then we've got
a family, we're growing, and it's just something that at
that moment you want to confide more into that person.
If you're actually there for counseling, you're not going to
use it the first second you get caught. You want
to use that as a Oh no, let me not
put a lock on my door. Let me feel like
I can actually come to this person even though you
(07:49):
don't want to. Hey, there's so many times in a
relationship you don't want to be with that person that's
right across the table, and that's the person that those
are the times you have to be a couple.
Speaker 1 (07:58):
Hey, before you get married.
Speaker 2 (08:00):
You know what, one of the best things I would
recommend is and nobody recommended it to me. I've told
Joe my son, that before you get married, go to
a counselor and ask him how you should fight, Like,
how do you how do you fight in a relationship
because one of the things is we we always figure
out what to do after we fought. We never figured
out how to do it before we are fighting. And
(08:22):
it's the conversations that you know, need to come up,
I think in pre marital counseling, which a lot of
people I think tend to not do. I know that
sometimes they'll do it just because the whatever church or
whatever place you're going to get married at well will
require you to get a couple of classes. But it's
honestly something I think you should go ongoing with and
not be afraid of.
Speaker 3 (08:41):
Even if you're like, well, we don't even really fight
right now, you will, you absolutely will.
Speaker 2 (08:46):
And honestly, the first couple are sometimes the worst because
you're not ready for it, you know, and you let
up a lot of you know, built up anger from
something that might have come years ago while you were
just dating. Kelly wants to come wore are the roses?
Speaker 11 (09:02):
Yeah, So I was kind of in the same similar situation.
I was married for a long time and my husband
had stepped out of the marriage.
Speaker 5 (09:11):
Not saying that it's wrong.
Speaker 11 (09:13):
Completely or I'm not saying that it's right, it is
definitely wrong to step out of the marriage, but I.
Speaker 4 (09:18):
Will say that it's really hard.
Speaker 11 (09:21):
I kind of want to defend him because it's really hard.
It sounded like he really wanted her attention and she's
just not giving it to him. And it's really hard
to sometimes have that open heart if somebody isn't doing
the same to you. So I don't want to say
again that what he did was right, but it's really
(09:41):
hard to love somebody who doesn't love you back that
at least it doesn't feel like it. You have to
give every relationship one hundred percent. Everybody says, no, you
got to get fifty to fifty to make a hundred.
Speaker 5 (09:53):
No, I'm not going to give you half of me.
Speaker 4 (09:55):
I give you all of me.
Speaker 5 (09:56):
There's one hundred one hundred.
Speaker 12 (09:58):
So some maybe he's just not feeling like she's giving
him the attention. He did say, you know you don't
you don't pay attention to me, and he did mention
it was a long time since they you know, had
been you know, together, you know, romantically, and sometimes for
people that's their relationship, that's how they talk, that's their relationship,
that's how they want to, you know, show.
Speaker 6 (10:18):
Their love to some people.
Speaker 11 (10:20):
And it's just I don't know, I just feel like
he's just not being seen by her.
Speaker 5 (10:24):
And again not saying that it was right to step
out of the relationship.
Speaker 11 (10:27):
He should have brought it to her attention, but she
also should have taken that in consideration.
Speaker 2 (10:32):
Yeah, and again I don't want to come down on
her because I know it seems like we're swaying where
we're you know, giving this guy forgiveness. There's no forgiveness
on what he's doing. He's got to get her forgiveness.
That's the biggest thing he's going to have to try
to work towards. But but you know, you bring up
a very interesting point of fair Yeah, fair point.
Speaker 1 (10:50):
What's going on, Steve Hi.
Speaker 6 (10:53):
I don't know.
Speaker 1 (10:54):
He guys doing with Flora and my name doing great?
Steve wore the roses. What's your comment?
Speaker 6 (10:59):
Oh, yeah, I tested them. This one kind of hits
close to home for me. I went through the same,
almost the exact same situation as the two of these are.
But I've only been with my wife for about thirteen years.
But we got to the points of where we were
in separate veteroms. Believe it or not, I actually put
a lock on my door. Wow, I put a lock
on I put a lock on my door because at
(11:19):
the time we were not me and my wife, we're
not intimate. For over a year, she was doing the yelling,
telling me what to do things like she commented on
it with his wife, and it got to the points
to where I didn't want to deal with it anymore.
So I locked myself there and so she could get
in there when I got home and worked, so it
was a way for me to separate for her coming
in there. It got to the points where I actually
(11:40):
cheated one that I worked with in the past. In
the end, she caught me. I thought we were done
to come to find out. Once she caught me, it
actually forced us to sit down and have an adult
conversation where we both realized that yes, I was completely
in the wrong for cheating and owned up to it. However,
she accepted the fact that she felt that she did
(12:04):
things as well to drive me away, to cause me
to go look for intimacy and you know, from from
another woman. And in the end we actually worked through it. Now, granted,
we still have issues from time to time where she'll
come to me and tell me she feels a certain
way and I have to show her that I'm not
doing anything, which is perfectly understandable. But in the end
(12:25):
we actually worked through it, and we're actually closer now
than we were when we first.
Speaker 1 (12:28):
Got to go.
Speaker 3 (12:29):
What a story. Thank you for sharing that story.
Speaker 6 (12:32):
There is hope, There is hope for them.
Speaker 2 (12:34):
Can I actually ask you one quick question going back
to the lock. Well, you say you put the lock
on there because you wanted a separation. You were cheating
at the time you put the lock on the door, right.
Speaker 6 (12:44):
Uh so at first believe it or not? At first no,
but it turned into that because once the lock was there,
she couldn't get to.
Speaker 2 (12:51):
Me because to me, to me, the idea that want
you don't want her to see suffer?
Speaker 1 (12:57):
Do it? What do you what do you not want
her to see? You know what I mean?
Speaker 6 (13:00):
Well, yeah, but it wasn't the fact that I didn't
want her to see anything. So like for example, in
my situation, you know, when you get to the point
of frustration, Right, You argue and you yell and you scream. Right, Well,
my wife is the type of person where when she
gets upset, she's very passionate, starts going off, and after
a while you start kind of feeling beat down, and
(13:21):
rather than have a front conference, you know, like a
front argument all the time, you're like, I'm just gonna
not deal with this and I'm just gonna lock my
door so that if you get mad, you can't even
come in here, and I can literally just ignore the
hear exists at this point. It's honestly the easiest way
to do it. But in turn, by doing that, you know,
caused the separation to be even more than eventually.
Speaker 1 (13:44):
Yeah, and I.
Speaker 7 (13:45):
Feel like oftentimes the lock is more symbolic than it
is a physical demonstration, Like the locking of it is
literally like you're locking your heart off to that person.
And when I think about locking it off, it's almost
like when you're in pain, the first thing you want
to do is get away from being in pain. Yeah,
you want to stop the bleeding, so to speak, but
(14:06):
the absence of pain isn't healing. And I think you
think that I'm healing something by locking the door, because
I don't get to hear the rah rah rah in
my face. But you're not being healed in this situation,
and it oftentimes like listening to him and in this
ward of roses is making things worse way quicker than
it's making things better.
Speaker 1 (14:24):
All Right, we'll get an update on this war of
the roses.
Speaker 2 (14:26):
I want to see how this couple is doing right
now after having this situation happen to them. So keep
listening to Mojo in the Morning, and if you missed it,
go check it out. It's on our podcast right now.
Speaker 1 (14:36):
The whole of the second date update. This is Mojo
in the Morning.
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