October 20, 2025 • 32 mins
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Speaker 1 (00:02):
Welcome to the We Don't Podcast, starring husband and wife
Mojo from Mojo in the Morning and his better half
Chelsea on this episode.
Speaker 2 (00:22):
Coming up on this episode of the weedone podcast, This
idea for the podcast came when you and I were
both drinking. You want to expand on.
Speaker 3 (00:31):
Anything, I mean when we start the episode.
Speaker 2 (00:34):
Okay, let's do it. That's not much of a tease though.
Speaker 3 (00:37):
Okay, well they'll listen anyway.
Speaker 1 (00:39):
All right, well, all right, all right, all right, without
further delay, here are Mojo and Chelsea.
Speaker 2 (00:46):
Okay, so this idea came when we were having some drinks,
which was good to see you back drinking a little
bit because you haven't been drinking.
Speaker 3 (00:55):
Is that the best part of me is when I drink, it.
Speaker 2 (00:57):
Makes me feel like you are normal. I know that
you have said this, that we've talked before about going
out a couple of times and you saying I think
I'm back. But when you all of a sudden said
to me and we were home, yeah, so we were
just hanging at the house and you said, you know what,
let's have a drink. I was like, oh my god,
this is great. Something took over Chelsea. This is fantastic
(01:20):
and we turned off TV and that was the coolest thing.
Speaker 3 (01:24):
That's true. We just sat there and talked.
Speaker 2 (01:26):
We didn't watch any shows about people murdering people and
wearing their skin.
Speaker 3 (01:31):
Well yeah, or ed Gan.
Speaker 2 (01:33):
Thing is the lady the lady who is the Karen
neighbor that shot and killed her neighbor, Like all these
Netflix shows that you like to watch. Why what is
up with you in these morbid shows?
Speaker 4 (01:44):
And I love Dateline. I don't know, I don't know
what's going on. I've always liked Dateline to be fair,
and the documentaries are fun to watch.
Speaker 2 (01:53):
But everything you watched, like, I've never seen you, like
watch a documentary on like the Beatles or something like that.
Speaker 3 (01:58):
Or that doesn't interest me.
Speaker 2 (01:59):
Michael Jack sometimes George Michael. You love George Michael Yeah, some.
Speaker 3 (02:04):
Yeah, I have to really like. I don't know.
Speaker 2 (02:06):
It's just it's what it's always about. Some guy that well.
Speaker 4 (02:09):
That's what you pay attention to, That's what you pay
attention to. You don't pay attention to everything I watch.
Speaker 2 (02:15):
Okay, sir, are you okay doing this topic?
Speaker 4 (02:18):
Yeah?
Speaker 2 (02:18):
You know for sure because you brought this topic up
when you were drinking and I thought to myself, and
this was her idea. You started talking about something weird.
You said, if I if I died, what would you
do for a like a picture montage?
Speaker 3 (02:37):
I said, what songs would you play?
Speaker 4 (02:39):
Because side note, you have horrible taste in music, so
I just want to make sure that we get it
out there in the beginning, what songs I would like?
And we would probably have to rely on you to
AI the photos because any photos that you have of
me that you choose to either post or whatever, because
(03:00):
let's be will at the very beginning, when the boys
were little, all the photos are of you and the boys.
Why because I was the one taking all of the pictures.
And that's fine. But we'll probably just have to thank
God for AI and we can just put myself right
on in there, just make me look cute.
Speaker 2 (03:19):
What I'm going to do is I'm going to do
what I do for your birthday. When it's your birthday
and I want to put a post up on Facebook,
I just go to your Instagram and I pick whatever
pictures you have there. Smart so you need to get
more pictures up there.
Speaker 3 (03:34):
I just don't like to post a lot of myself.
I post a lot of the boys.
Speaker 2 (03:37):
I do have one picture that I'm going to I
definitely am going to include.
Speaker 3 (03:40):
Well you, I just want to make a folder.
Speaker 2 (03:43):
I do have it perfect ready.
Speaker 3 (03:44):
I'm going to show you what Chelsea's funeral.
Speaker 4 (03:46):
No, no, no, this is which By the way, I'm
not currently dying. I mean, we're all dying, but I'm not.
Everything is fine. But we were just talking about this
last night and it became really fun, like a fun
thing of like, oh my gosh, what song would do?
Speaker 1 (04:04):
Oh?
Speaker 2 (04:04):
This is so fun.
Speaker 3 (04:05):
It was fun for me.
Speaker 2 (04:06):
This is my picture I'm gonna put in this montage
of you.
Speaker 3 (04:12):
I hate that photo.
Speaker 2 (04:13):
What explain what that photo is.
Speaker 4 (04:15):
It's a picture of me in my mom and dad's house,
may be a couple of weeks before I delivered Joey,
and I'm wearing one of his shirts.
Speaker 3 (04:27):
It's a horrific photo.
Speaker 2 (04:29):
This photo was taken before Teen Mom came out on MTV,
and you look like younger than the teen Moms.
Speaker 3 (04:37):
It's just a horrific photo.
Speaker 4 (04:39):
It's going to be my legs are disgustingly fat.
Speaker 2 (04:42):
This one too. Yeah, you give him birth, Joe holding
him for the first time. I got a bunch of
these I save. What I do is I usually save
photos of you, and they're usually you always say I
hate that fucking photo. Delete it right now. Well, I
delete it it into a folder called delete it right now. Chelsea.
Speaker 4 (05:04):
That's nice, and that's what you'll show at my funeral.
But if you do that, every time you close your
eyes and blink, I will haunt you.
Speaker 2 (05:11):
You'll come back.
Speaker 4 (05:12):
So maybe I'll just send you some photos that I
like be displayed.
Speaker 2 (05:17):
I don't like the idea of doing a topic like this,
but you wanted to do it, and so I did
a little research.
Speaker 4 (05:22):
I was gonna say you didn't like it, but you
did all the research, so go ahead.
Speaker 2 (05:27):
I did a little research on this, and I realized
that my taste in music is not bad.
Speaker 3 (05:32):
That's awful.
Speaker 2 (05:33):
It might be your taste in music.
Speaker 3 (05:35):
Okay.
Speaker 2 (05:36):
It's funny because when we were throughout all of our lives,
we've only had I think like five songs that I
ever would say are songs that you and I would say, oh,
that's kind of like our song.
Speaker 4 (05:48):
So correction, okay, you are the one that would say
this is our song, this is our song. I'm very
interested in what you think because again, I think that
you don't listen to anything, and it's okay. You have
your own idea in your own head of what you
think would be our song aside from the song that
we danced to at our wedding.
Speaker 3 (06:07):
I don't know, and you know what would be our song?
Speaker 2 (06:12):
I have like a couple like serious ones and I
have some goof ones. Okay, all right, So here are
a couple serious ones. If you asked me to celine
Dion because that was one of the first songs that
you and I ever had as a song.
Speaker 4 (06:29):
So this is where we disagree on this. I don't
think it was our song. I think it was popular
at the time when we first started dating, right.
Speaker 2 (06:38):
Yeah, fair Iris Goo Goo Dolls.
Speaker 3 (06:42):
Again, that was not even popular when we met.
Speaker 2 (06:45):
Are you gonna let me do this video? You're gonna
be dead at the time? Landslide by Fleetwood Mac because
I know you love Fleetwood Mac.
Speaker 3 (06:56):
Well. I love that song and I.
Speaker 2 (06:58):
Actually thought about putting it and some pictures of you
with the boys and doing uh the Return to Pooh
Corner and Sunshine uh for the boys like for each
each boy song in there? What's your song for with Luke?
Is it Coldplay song, isn't it?
Speaker 3 (07:18):
Or yeah? Uh this look how the Stars Shine for you?
I can't think of it.
Speaker 2 (07:27):
Hold that hand ready, I'm gonna look it up real quick.
Uh Coldplay it is. I'm not going to say, here's
all the.
Speaker 3 (07:40):
Sky full of stars?
Speaker 2 (07:41):
Sky full of Stars? And Jacob's song is.
Speaker 3 (07:45):
The one I was saying to many was little is it?
Speaker 2 (07:47):
You Are My Sunshine? Yeah? And then Joe's was returned
to Pooh Corner was one of those songs. Current song
right now that you really love and I think it
has a lot of meaning because you started hearing it
when you got diagnosed. Was Life or Death? That declan
Donovan song which if you guys haven't listened to, and
(08:10):
then our our wedding song which was beautiful in My Eyes?
Any other any song of these songs that you.
Speaker 3 (08:18):
Don't like, well, probably all of them.
Speaker 4 (08:21):
But I just what I'll do is I'll just make
you a folder of songs and I'm just going to.
Speaker 3 (08:26):
Make the video too.
Speaker 2 (08:28):
Some people do that.
Speaker 3 (08:29):
I'm sure. And what do I tell you?
Speaker 2 (08:31):
I said, I want to prepare.
Speaker 3 (08:33):
Well, what did I tell you yesterday? As well?
Speaker 4 (08:35):
Like if I knew that something, If I knew that
something was happening to me, I would want a living funeral.
Speaker 3 (08:42):
Yeah, I would want to go and.
Speaker 4 (08:45):
So that way, if there are people that are there
that are like, h she, you know, I would be like,
why are you here?
Speaker 2 (08:52):
Why are you here here? Here are some songs that
did not make the cut, Queens and other one bites
the Dust. Do you see that one ac DC's Highway
to Hell?
Speaker 3 (09:05):
I mean, you never know.
Speaker 2 (09:12):
That's on there. I think it's Foreigner Cold as Ice.
Speaker 3 (09:17):
That's a good one.
Speaker 2 (09:18):
Do you remember the song I Just Died in your
arms tonight?
Speaker 3 (09:22):
Oh my god, there must have.
Speaker 2 (09:24):
Been something beautiful tonight. You look beautiful tonight be another
one of those songs. So those are kind of good ones.
And then yesterday when I was doing research on emotional
songs to play at wedding or at funerals, it was
Supermarket Flowers, which I never heard that song, but I
played it for you last night, and it was that
Sharon song Oh in what a Wonderful World.
Speaker 3 (09:47):
Well, that's one of my grandfather's songs.
Speaker 2 (09:49):
Yeah, and I'll put pictures of your grandfather.
Speaker 4 (09:52):
The one that I want you to do though, is
this woman's work.
Speaker 2 (09:55):
I like that one, which have you not heard that song.
It's Kate Bush and it's really really good.
Speaker 3 (10:01):
And it's a really good song.
Speaker 2 (10:02):
So we listened to that song laying in bed. You
let me like hold you, and then it turned into
me groping you and no.
Speaker 3 (10:12):
No, it's not even true. We were not in bed
when night you played that.
Speaker 2 (10:15):
Oh, and that's right, we were laying on the the couch.
Speaker 3 (10:20):
See how you make things up in your head.
Speaker 2 (10:22):
I don't like when you we lay in bed and
you and you let me hold you because you never
used to let me do this before you had this
diagnosis and all this stuff, like you was literally you
were very cold with me before. And when I say before,
I'm talking about thirty years before. But lately you've been
letting me do that. Explain why what is it?
Speaker 3 (10:44):
Well, I think that's kind of mean to say I
was very cold to you. Yeah, that's you know.
Speaker 4 (10:49):
I apologize, but I just I mean, for the first
part of our marriage, I had kids, so I really
didn't want to be touched all my and then because
I had kids hanging on me all day, and then
we had a string of really tough time between us.
So and I'm just not a touchy feely person. I'm
(11:11):
trying to be more I'm doing it.
Speaker 5 (11:13):
For you, not for me really, because I really I'm
almost sensing that you almost want me to be close
to you, like I've actually I enjoy it. I mean,
I well that and you well.
Speaker 4 (11:29):
But you said to me it's important to you that
I hold your hand. So I am making a conscious
effort to hold your hand. Not that I don't want to,
but I know it's important to you. To me, that's
physical touch is not something that is important to me
at all. So I'm trying to do it for you.
Speaker 2 (11:43):
Have there been some times though, where you feel like
you need it, You feel like you need to have
a little bit because you're definitely more opening to me,
you know, the last I would say six weeks as
far as telling me like how.
Speaker 4 (11:56):
You came well, just because I want you to know
how I'm feeling. Sure, do I think? I mean it's
comforting for sure, But I again, it's not something I'm
trying to be more conscious and make a bigger effort
for you too, if that makes sense.
Speaker 2 (12:13):
Yeah, does it bring comfort to you? What does it
bring comfort to you to know that we are spending
a little bit more time like I feel like I've been.
One of the things I've been trying to do is
I've been trying to spend more time with you.
Speaker 4 (12:27):
Well again, so to me, what means the most to
me is you being present and not being on your
phone and being present in the moment. It has nothing
to do with physical touch. I literally could be just
like last night when I was sitting on the couch
across from you and talking to you and you were
being present. That means more to me than anything else.
(12:49):
So we for and then I'm trying to make it
also good for you, so holding your hand and doing
something stuff like that, that's not.
Speaker 2 (13:03):
So my My part of the deal is that I
just got to be more present and not be on
my phone or watching TV or anything like that. Just
be more just more.
Speaker 3 (13:14):
Yeah, more oppressive to the moment, which is very hard.
Speaker 2 (13:18):
I gotta get better at it. I listen, I take
total ownership of it. My problem though, is I've taken
total ownership of it for years, and it always says
ended up in being something that.
Speaker 4 (13:30):
Well, it's hard, I think they Well, it's you have
an addiction to your phone number one, and you are
easily distracted, like you always like to say, well, I
have add I have adhd well, then fix it like
if because it just makes you. It makes me feel
like the phone is more important than what is going on,
(13:54):
like anytime you answer the phone and we're together, or
the other night when we were with Joe and Alyssa
and you got a FaceTime phone call and literally Joe
was in the middle of the sentence and he looked
at me and he's like, are you fucking kidding me
that he just did that?
Speaker 3 (14:08):
And I said, welcome.
Speaker 2 (14:09):
To my world, and you know you pointed that out.
And this is something Joe doesn't listen to this podcast,
but he should because it really was awesome how you
said you've always done this with me in raising the kids,
that you would in the moment not try to make
me look bad, but then the next day find the
(14:34):
proper time to basically happy just you and I.
Speaker 4 (14:37):
Except Joe's an adult, and I like he needs to know,
like that's that I was disappointed disappointed for him at
that moment. And I think it's when if he was
little out of said oh, Dad has to get that
phone call because it's important for work, or he didn't
mean to cut you off. And take a stupid phone
call that it really doesn't matter. But you know, he's
(14:59):
an adult.
Speaker 2 (15:00):
You did a great job, allay.
Speaker 4 (15:01):
He needs to know that that's rude and don't don't
do that in your relationship because it makes up He
felt like his story was not as important as really
a phone call that could have You could.
Speaker 3 (15:15):
Have talked to the people another time.
Speaker 2 (15:17):
Yeah, I will say this to you, and this is
I give you. I do give you a lot of
credit for a lot of things. And honestly, you've been
such a great wife at making me a better dad,
and I have taken to the things that you've said
when it deals with the kids, and then you'll tell
(15:40):
me things that will make me a better husband, and
for some reason I don't.
Speaker 3 (15:44):
And you don't listen.
Speaker 2 (15:46):
No, I hear you, but I don't do a good
job of doing it. And I don't know what it is.
I'm aware of it. Now.
Speaker 4 (15:55):
You're not a horrible husband, Like, yeah, you're not a
horrible I am, but I I'm telling you that you're not.
Speaker 5 (16:01):
You're not.
Speaker 4 (16:01):
But no, but there are things that you can do better,
and there's things that I can do better.
Speaker 3 (16:08):
You know.
Speaker 4 (16:10):
The common thread on my side that I've always asked
for is attention and not like look at me. I
want to be the center of the universe. It's can
we have a talk? You don't hear And I don't
take this personally because you do it, and I think
it's part of a hazard of your job. When you
are working in the studio, you're running a board, you're
(16:32):
looking at different computer screens, and you the reason you're
so good at your job is because you are three
steps ahead of the conversation.
Speaker 3 (16:41):
You know where you want it to go. You know
where you want it to end.
Speaker 4 (16:45):
Because your break is so long, You've got you know,
six to twelve minutes, whatever you're whatever in your head.
Speaker 3 (16:51):
You have how you want this to go. The problem
is when.
Speaker 4 (16:55):
That comes home and you are not pro in our conversation.
And I don't think this is exclusive to you. This
is just you know, our dynamic, but you aren't present
because it's again, I see it when you talk to
your friends and when.
Speaker 3 (17:11):
You it's just you and it's not malicious.
Speaker 4 (17:13):
The reason that I give you grace or give you
a little because I know you're not doing it to
be mean, and I know it's just you do I
wish that it was a little bit better. Yeah, but
you know, it's just who you are.
Speaker 2 (17:29):
I've been told, and it probably is true that I've
always known that the people that I do that too
will be there for me sure and be okay with it,
and until one day they're not, and that will be
the time that will hurt me the most.
Speaker 3 (17:46):
Do you think it will because I died or a.
Speaker 2 (17:48):
Well, I'm hoping it's not. I'm hoping it's not.
Speaker 3 (17:52):
And then what music will you be playing?
Speaker 2 (17:56):
Let's say on a happier note. Yes, we went to
a wedding this weekend.
Speaker 1 (18:00):
We did.
Speaker 2 (18:01):
We got a chance to go and see Luke Shilling
and Kayla. I have no idea what her last name is.
Speaker 3 (18:08):
Now it's chilling, but now it's chilling.
Speaker 2 (18:10):
But Luke and Kayla got married. That's Jed from The
Joe Show's brother Luke. And it was so fun to
see the Shillings and being able to be there. It
was also really nice we had to spend time with
Joe and his fiancee Alyssa. And this is the part
that's interesting because let's not talk about funerals, Let's talk
about weddings. Because a lot of Joe and Alyssa's wedding
(18:34):
was coming up with us because we spent a three
hours basically driving an hour and a half. It seemed
like wedding and from the wedding, and it was interesting
because you were you were kind of vocal about their
wedding and what you wanted to see at their wedding. No, well,
(18:55):
you said you gave a couple of things that you
asked for.
Speaker 3 (18:58):
I gave one thing that I asked I have.
Speaker 2 (19:01):
I have explained that.
Speaker 4 (19:02):
I have said, there's just I want this one song
if we I let them listen to the song. And
I said, if I only ask for one thing, can
we play this song and then have people come up
and pray over you guys as a couple, do you
want to share with It's called the blessing? So that's
I did not ask for a couple of things I have.
(19:25):
I am staying so far out of this wedding because
it is about Alissa and and Joe. It's his wedding too,
but I know it's a day like for her and her.
Speaker 2 (19:39):
Mom.
Speaker 4 (19:40):
So I you need to be very careful with what
you say because I have asked.
Speaker 2 (19:45):
For only what Although you said you're going to get it.
You're going to do a toast? Are you going to
do that? Or is that not a joke?
Speaker 3 (19:52):
Said that to you?
Speaker 2 (19:53):
Yeah?
Speaker 4 (19:53):
Yeah, I kind of half joking because I know you
can't handle it if people don't ask you to do something,
because you would want to to be the one giving
a toast.
Speaker 2 (20:01):
I don't get to do shit, do it, but not.
Speaker 3 (20:03):
Really get to pay for a part of the wedding.
That's all you got.
Speaker 2 (20:08):
I love the idea of what you want to do
though with the blessing, because I think that that's kind
of that. That's cool. Do you do you really want
them married in a church? Do you really feel like
they need to be married in a church? Well?
Speaker 4 (20:21):
What i'd really what I really want is for them
to have a direction in which this is going. I mean,
I think I want them to figure out what religion
this is based in. I want them.
Speaker 3 (20:36):
I think that they.
Speaker 4 (20:36):
Should know this by now. They should they should have
known it before they booked anything. But I'm not involved
in it, and I'm staying out of it. I am
pushing some form of religion because I think that that
is important. Now, if they decide that it's not important,
they have been saying to me multiple times that it
(20:58):
is important to them, but they're still not doing anything.
So also I am backing off because again, it is
not my wedding, it is not my daughter, it is
my son.
Speaker 3 (21:09):
And she did say to me, you know, I want
you involved.
Speaker 4 (21:11):
I want you to be a part of this because
it is Joe's day two and I thought that that
was very sweet for her to say, because I've had
other mother of grooms that will say, you know, she
doesn't even include us or and she has been very
inclusive with me. She asked, she invited me to go
out wedding dress shopping with them. I couldn't go because
(21:32):
it was Mother's Day with Luke. But she's been very
inclusive in those things. But also I am trying to
be extremely sensitive to make sure that they know this
is her day and I because I can be very opinionated,
you know, I'm but I really but I have not
been with them.
Speaker 3 (21:52):
Yeah, I have been very this is about them and
not me.
Speaker 2 (21:58):
Do you do you think when Alissa says I want
you to be involved, that she's doing that because she
just wants you to feel included, or do you think
part of it though could be that she does want
you involved.
Speaker 4 (22:13):
I think it's I think it is important to her
because she sees the relationship that Joe and I have
that it is important because she knows it's important to Joe,
so therefore it's important to her. Yeah, and so that's why.
And I appreciate that she does it. But again, and
(22:34):
I cannot say it enough because I don't want to
be that mother in law that is saying anything. Ask
me and I'll do but I will not say it
should be this way or you should do this.
Speaker 5 (22:46):
I have.
Speaker 4 (22:48):
Talked to them before about finances and they have chosen
their direction that they want to go, and I have
to respect it and not come in and say it.
Not come in and save the day, but let them.
I think this is an important thing. And this is
where you and I will probably have some disagreements because
(23:10):
when you make a decision and you decide to have
it a certain way, they need to, you know, yeah,
do it.
Speaker 2 (23:19):
It's funny watching these two go through what they're going through,
and it's been a process. It's been a long process.
I mean, it's not like they're quick to do it,
because their wedding's not for over a year the day
that they chose. But it's wild because it made me
think a lot about you and I. Ours was similar.
(23:41):
We did not We got engaged and we had a
pretty long engagement year and a half. Yeah, I mean
that was It's weird because I don't know what the
times were then of was.
Speaker 4 (23:54):
That norm, but so we still were so young. I
think both of our families encouraged to have long, a.
Speaker 2 (24:01):
Long engagement, and these guys are doing it that same
way too, And I think that there's some similarities that
make me think a lot, you know, about what well.
I think that there's some similarities in the fact that
it's a longer engagement. I think there's some similarities in
the fact that we would like religion to be part
of this thing. Are My dad actually wasn't so much
(24:24):
he wanted religion. He actually asked for us, specifically to
get married in a Catholic church. Like that was some
and you're not Catholic, So that was amazing that you
were willing to do that. You were very flexible in
the fact that I was very young, but it was
not something that your parents wanted.
Speaker 3 (24:42):
No, I was very young.
Speaker 4 (24:44):
I mean it was that I got married We did
get married in the church that my mom grew up in,
so it wasn't hard for me to But my parents
were Christian, and you were raised Catholic, and it was
not only was important to your dad, it was important
to your sisters. And I was young, very young, and
(25:06):
I was trying to please everyone except for my family.
So I look back on that and I think, and
I don't regret it. By the way, of course, I
didn't regret getting married in a Catholic church. I had
to promise to raise my kids in the or to
baptize them in the Catholic religion, which I did. All
three were baptized in a Catholic church, but they all
were dedicated in a Christian church too. I felt like
(25:29):
I could finally buy then I could have a little voice.
Speaker 3 (25:31):
Of my own.
Speaker 4 (25:32):
I look back on it now, and I don't know
that I would have gotten married in a Catholic church.
You know, it's not I probably would have gotten married
in a Christian church, but I just I want it
to be and Joe and Alyssa both have said that
they want God in it. I can't tell them how
(25:56):
to do it. I'm trying to give them like asking questions,
have you thought of this? Have you thought of that?
Speaker 3 (26:02):
Have you gone and visited a church?
Speaker 4 (26:04):
We can start with that question, do you know where
a church isn't let me show you what one looks like.
But they and again, so it's one thing for them
to say it, it's another thing for if it is
important to them. Because if they're saying it just to
make me happy, or you happy, or her mom happy,
this isn't about us.
Speaker 3 (26:25):
It's about them.
Speaker 4 (26:27):
I would like God to be a part of their marriage,
but that it is about them. And I also where
I didn't feel comfortable because I was super young. It
was hard for me to say this is stay out
of my business. You know what this is and that's
your family my family. Now I have no problem saying it.
Speaker 2 (26:48):
I don't change.
Speaker 3 (26:49):
I know age and.
Speaker 4 (26:51):
I got cancer, so I have no problem. And I
don't want to be for seen my opinion and what
I think should happen. That's why I am so careful
with what I say to them. I may I make
them ask me something before I don't put my two
(27:12):
cents in. You know, there was one thing when she
one thing I did tell her was ah, because they
are paying for the majority of the wedding. You and
I are helping with a good chunk, but they are
paying for the majority of it.
Speaker 3 (27:28):
And so that's why I feel I can give a little.
Speaker 4 (27:34):
Bit of input, you know, not for any reason other
than we were talking about it and she's like, I
just know that it's going to be them, you know,
ever since I was little. It's going to be the
best day of my life. And I said, it's not.
It's actually not the best day of your life. And
I'm going to tell you why. The best day of
(27:54):
your life, it's a day that you have a child,
the best day of your life because it's your wedding
is really over before it begins.
Speaker 3 (28:04):
It's a blur of a day. Yes.
Speaker 4 (28:06):
Is it a beautiful day, yes? Is it a special day, yes,
But it's not the best day. And it's funny because
then I thought, oh, should I have said that, because
I don't want to take away And I talked to
a couple of my friends and every single friend of
mine was like, no, not the best day.
Speaker 3 (28:24):
It's not the best day because it just really isn't.
Speaker 4 (28:26):
It's a great day, but it's you work up to
this day and literally again, it is over before it begins.
It's such a blur. It's an important day, but it's
not the best day. There are so many days that
you will look back and think, oh my gosh, this
one percent was better than my wedding day. And you
(28:50):
you know, we talked to them about getting counseling because
marriage is extremely difficult and they're in this fun phase
of planning this beautiful day that they're going to have.
Their wedding will be beautiful, and it will be a
beautiful day, but the reality of it is, you know,
then life kicks.
Speaker 3 (29:10):
In and marriage is hard. Marriage is really really hard.
You know.
Speaker 2 (29:17):
Wise thoughts from a wise lady. If we got married today,
you were going to say that, no, hold on, let
me get some more songs here, Meredith Brooks, bitch, uh.
Speaker 3 (29:32):
Uh, if we got married today, I like that.
Speaker 2 (29:35):
I like that one as a song.
Speaker 4 (29:37):
See this is okay, okay, back on track. If we
got married today, No.
Speaker 2 (29:42):
If we got If we got married today, I know
things would be so different because I think both you
and I would have more voices to be able to
say something.
Speaker 4 (29:51):
I also feel that you you are a people pleaser
and you really care about what your family thinks.
Speaker 3 (29:59):
And what a other people think. I don't care.
Speaker 2 (30:02):
I know you don't care, and I wish I had
a little bit more of you in me. I do
think you do care. No, I do think you do
care because I think that you. Here's the deal. You
don't care about anything that other people think except.
Speaker 3 (30:19):
My children, your children. Yeah, that's true. I do.
Speaker 4 (30:23):
I do.
Speaker 3 (30:23):
I do care about three people's opinions. Yeah.
Speaker 2 (30:26):
And if Joe, Jacob or Luke said, Mom, this is
what I'm gonna do, it may be hard pill for
you to swallow, but I think that you as long
as it didn't hurt them obviously or whatever you would say.
Speaker 4 (30:42):
We've had a couple of those moments already where I
have they have made decisions that I didn't fully agree with.
But what I have learned and what I have done
is I will say, you know what, I don't agree
with that. I just want you to hear me out why,
and we have a great discussion because I don't want
to feel like I feel as their parent, you know.
(31:05):
But then when then they go on and their decision
is made, and it is my job to support them,
and it is my job to stand behind them and
just talk shit about it to you do you do?
Speaker 2 (31:18):
I told you so, I told you so.
Speaker 3 (31:21):
I will never do and I told you so. But
I'll just look at him like.
Speaker 2 (31:26):
That look.
Speaker 3 (31:27):
But I'll never say I told you so.
Speaker 2 (31:28):
The look that I get every night when I say, hey,
you want.
Speaker 3 (31:31):
To that's just a hand in her face.
Speaker 2 (31:34):
Now, all right, What a weekend, What a weekend? What
a podcast? By the way, shout out to the nice
lady that we sat behind on the airplane. Yeah, I said,
I guess I'm not getting a podcasts.
Speaker 3 (31:48):
She was very nicely, very nice. Yes, thank you for
saying hello to both of us.
Speaker 2 (31:52):
I appreciate it, and I hope she doesn't mind. But
I was listening to her conversation with the lady next
to her, and her son is an airline pilot.
Speaker 3 (31:59):
Such a nosy nosy I am
Welcome to the We Don't Podcast, starring husband and wife
Mojo from Mojo in the Morning and his better half
Chelsea on this episode.
Speaker 2 (00:22):
Coming up on this episode of the weedone podcast, This
idea for the podcast came when you and I were
both drinking. You want to expand on.
Speaker 3 (00:31):
Anything, I mean when we start the episode.
Speaker 2 (00:34):
Okay, let's do it. That's not much of a tease though.
Speaker 3 (00:37):
Okay, well they'll listen anyway.
Speaker 1 (00:39):
All right, well, all right, all right, all right, without
further delay, here are Mojo and Chelsea.
Speaker 2 (00:46):
Okay, so this idea came when we were having some drinks,
which was good to see you back drinking a little
bit because you haven't been drinking.
Speaker 3 (00:55):
Is that the best part of me is when I drink, it.
Speaker 2 (00:57):
Makes me feel like you are normal. I know that
you have said this, that we've talked before about going
out a couple of times and you saying I think
I'm back. But when you all of a sudden said
to me and we were home, yeah, so we were
just hanging at the house and you said, you know what,
let's have a drink. I was like, oh my god,
this is great. Something took over Chelsea. This is fantastic
(01:20):
and we turned off TV and that was the coolest thing.
Speaker 3 (01:24):
That's true. We just sat there and talked.
Speaker 2 (01:26):
We didn't watch any shows about people murdering people and
wearing their skin.
Speaker 3 (01:31):
Well yeah, or ed Gan.
Speaker 2 (01:33):
Thing is the lady the lady who is the Karen
neighbor that shot and killed her neighbor, Like all these
Netflix shows that you like to watch. Why what is
up with you in these morbid shows?
Speaker 4 (01:44):
And I love Dateline. I don't know, I don't know
what's going on. I've always liked Dateline to be fair,
and the documentaries are fun to watch.
Speaker 2 (01:53):
But everything you watched, like, I've never seen you, like
watch a documentary on like the Beatles or something like that.
Speaker 3 (01:58):
Or that doesn't interest me.
Speaker 2 (01:59):
Michael Jack sometimes George Michael. You love George Michael Yeah, some.
Speaker 3 (02:04):
Yeah, I have to really like. I don't know.
Speaker 2 (02:06):
It's just it's what it's always about. Some guy that well.
Speaker 4 (02:09):
That's what you pay attention to, That's what you pay
attention to. You don't pay attention to everything I watch.
Speaker 2 (02:15):
Okay, sir, are you okay doing this topic?
Speaker 4 (02:18):
Yeah?
Speaker 2 (02:18):
You know for sure because you brought this topic up
when you were drinking and I thought to myself, and
this was her idea. You started talking about something weird.
You said, if I if I died, what would you
do for a like a picture montage?
Speaker 3 (02:37):
I said, what songs would you play?
Speaker 4 (02:39):
Because side note, you have horrible taste in music, so
I just want to make sure that we get it
out there in the beginning, what songs I would like?
And we would probably have to rely on you to
AI the photos because any photos that you have of
me that you choose to either post or whatever, because
(03:00):
let's be will at the very beginning, when the boys
were little, all the photos are of you and the boys.
Why because I was the one taking all of the pictures.
And that's fine. But we'll probably just have to thank
God for AI and we can just put myself right
on in there, just make me look cute.
Speaker 2 (03:19):
What I'm going to do is I'm going to do
what I do for your birthday. When it's your birthday
and I want to put a post up on Facebook,
I just go to your Instagram and I pick whatever
pictures you have there. Smart so you need to get
more pictures up there.
Speaker 3 (03:34):
I just don't like to post a lot of myself.
I post a lot of the boys.
Speaker 2 (03:37):
I do have one picture that I'm going to I
definitely am going to include.
Speaker 3 (03:40):
Well you, I just want to make a folder.
Speaker 2 (03:43):
I do have it perfect ready.
Speaker 3 (03:44):
I'm going to show you what Chelsea's funeral.
Speaker 4 (03:46):
No, no, no, this is which By the way, I'm
not currently dying. I mean, we're all dying, but I'm not.
Everything is fine. But we were just talking about this
last night and it became really fun, like a fun
thing of like, oh my gosh, what song would do?
Speaker 1 (04:04):
Oh?
Speaker 2 (04:04):
This is so fun.
Speaker 3 (04:05):
It was fun for me.
Speaker 2 (04:06):
This is my picture I'm gonna put in this montage
of you.
Speaker 3 (04:12):
I hate that photo.
Speaker 2 (04:13):
What explain what that photo is.
Speaker 4 (04:15):
It's a picture of me in my mom and dad's house,
may be a couple of weeks before I delivered Joey,
and I'm wearing one of his shirts.
Speaker 3 (04:27):
It's a horrific photo.
Speaker 2 (04:29):
This photo was taken before Teen Mom came out on MTV,
and you look like younger than the teen Moms.
Speaker 3 (04:37):
It's just a horrific photo.
Speaker 4 (04:39):
It's going to be my legs are disgustingly fat.
Speaker 2 (04:42):
This one too. Yeah, you give him birth, Joe holding
him for the first time. I got a bunch of
these I save. What I do is I usually save
photos of you, and they're usually you always say I
hate that fucking photo. Delete it right now. Well, I
delete it it into a folder called delete it right now. Chelsea.
Speaker 4 (05:04):
That's nice, and that's what you'll show at my funeral.
But if you do that, every time you close your
eyes and blink, I will haunt you.
Speaker 2 (05:11):
You'll come back.
Speaker 4 (05:12):
So maybe I'll just send you some photos that I
like be displayed.
Speaker 2 (05:17):
I don't like the idea of doing a topic like this,
but you wanted to do it, and so I did
a little research.
Speaker 4 (05:22):
I was gonna say you didn't like it, but you
did all the research, so go ahead.
Speaker 2 (05:27):
I did a little research on this, and I realized
that my taste in music is not bad.
Speaker 3 (05:32):
That's awful.
Speaker 2 (05:33):
It might be your taste in music.
Speaker 3 (05:35):
Okay.
Speaker 2 (05:36):
It's funny because when we were throughout all of our lives,
we've only had I think like five songs that I
ever would say are songs that you and I would say, oh,
that's kind of like our song.
Speaker 4 (05:48):
So correction, okay, you are the one that would say
this is our song, this is our song. I'm very
interested in what you think because again, I think that
you don't listen to anything, and it's okay. You have
your own idea in your own head of what you
think would be our song aside from the song that
we danced to at our wedding.
Speaker 3 (06:07):
I don't know, and you know what would be our song?
Speaker 2 (06:12):
I have like a couple like serious ones and I
have some goof ones. Okay, all right, So here are
a couple serious ones. If you asked me to celine
Dion because that was one of the first songs that
you and I ever had as a song.
Speaker 4 (06:29):
So this is where we disagree on this. I don't
think it was our song. I think it was popular
at the time when we first started dating, right.
Speaker 2 (06:38):
Yeah, fair Iris Goo Goo Dolls.
Speaker 3 (06:42):
Again, that was not even popular when we met.
Speaker 2 (06:45):
Are you gonna let me do this video? You're gonna
be dead at the time? Landslide by Fleetwood Mac because
I know you love Fleetwood Mac.
Speaker 3 (06:56):
Well. I love that song and I.
Speaker 2 (06:58):
Actually thought about putting it and some pictures of you
with the boys and doing uh the Return to Pooh
Corner and Sunshine uh for the boys like for each
each boy song in there? What's your song for with Luke?
Is it Coldplay song, isn't it?
Speaker 3 (07:18):
Or yeah? Uh this look how the Stars Shine for you?
I can't think of it.
Speaker 2 (07:27):
Hold that hand ready, I'm gonna look it up real quick.
Uh Coldplay it is. I'm not going to say, here's
all the.
Speaker 3 (07:40):
Sky full of stars?
Speaker 2 (07:41):
Sky full of Stars? And Jacob's song is.
Speaker 3 (07:45):
The one I was saying to many was little is it?
Speaker 2 (07:47):
You Are My Sunshine? Yeah? And then Joe's was returned
to Pooh Corner was one of those songs. Current song
right now that you really love and I think it
has a lot of meaning because you started hearing it
when you got diagnosed. Was Life or Death? That declan
Donovan song which if you guys haven't listened to, and
(08:10):
then our our wedding song which was beautiful in My Eyes?
Any other any song of these songs that you.
Speaker 3 (08:18):
Don't like, well, probably all of them.
Speaker 4 (08:21):
But I just what I'll do is I'll just make
you a folder of songs and I'm just going to.
Speaker 3 (08:26):
Make the video too.
Speaker 2 (08:28):
Some people do that.
Speaker 3 (08:29):
I'm sure. And what do I tell you?
Speaker 2 (08:31):
I said, I want to prepare.
Speaker 3 (08:33):
Well, what did I tell you yesterday? As well?
Speaker 4 (08:35):
Like if I knew that something, If I knew that
something was happening to me, I would want a living funeral.
Speaker 3 (08:42):
Yeah, I would want to go and.
Speaker 4 (08:45):
So that way, if there are people that are there
that are like, h she, you know, I would be like,
why are you here?
Speaker 2 (08:52):
Why are you here here? Here are some songs that
did not make the cut, Queens and other one bites
the Dust. Do you see that one ac DC's Highway
to Hell?
Speaker 3 (09:05):
I mean, you never know.
Speaker 2 (09:12):
That's on there. I think it's Foreigner Cold as Ice.
Speaker 3 (09:17):
That's a good one.
Speaker 2 (09:18):
Do you remember the song I Just Died in your
arms tonight?
Speaker 3 (09:22):
Oh my god, there must have.
Speaker 2 (09:24):
Been something beautiful tonight. You look beautiful tonight be another
one of those songs. So those are kind of good ones.
And then yesterday when I was doing research on emotional
songs to play at wedding or at funerals, it was
Supermarket Flowers, which I never heard that song, but I
played it for you last night, and it was that
Sharon song Oh in what a Wonderful World.
Speaker 3 (09:47):
Well, that's one of my grandfather's songs.
Speaker 2 (09:49):
Yeah, and I'll put pictures of your grandfather.
Speaker 4 (09:52):
The one that I want you to do though, is
this woman's work.
Speaker 2 (09:55):
I like that one, which have you not heard that song.
It's Kate Bush and it's really really good.
Speaker 3 (10:01):
And it's a really good song.
Speaker 2 (10:02):
So we listened to that song laying in bed. You
let me like hold you, and then it turned into
me groping you and no.
Speaker 3 (10:12):
No, it's not even true. We were not in bed
when night you played that.
Speaker 2 (10:15):
Oh, and that's right, we were laying on the the couch.
Speaker 3 (10:20):
See how you make things up in your head.
Speaker 2 (10:22):
I don't like when you we lay in bed and
you and you let me hold you because you never
used to let me do this before you had this
diagnosis and all this stuff, like you was literally you
were very cold with me before. And when I say before,
I'm talking about thirty years before. But lately you've been
letting me do that. Explain why what is it?
Speaker 3 (10:44):
Well, I think that's kind of mean to say I
was very cold to you. Yeah, that's you know.
Speaker 4 (10:49):
I apologize, but I just I mean, for the first
part of our marriage, I had kids, so I really
didn't want to be touched all my and then because
I had kids hanging on me all day, and then
we had a string of really tough time between us.
So and I'm just not a touchy feely person. I'm
(11:11):
trying to be more I'm doing it.
Speaker 5 (11:13):
For you, not for me really, because I really I'm
almost sensing that you almost want me to be close
to you, like I've actually I enjoy it. I mean,
I well that and you well.
Speaker 4 (11:29):
But you said to me it's important to you that
I hold your hand. So I am making a conscious
effort to hold your hand. Not that I don't want to,
but I know it's important to you. To me, that's
physical touch is not something that is important to me
at all. So I'm trying to do it for you.
Speaker 2 (11:43):
Have there been some times though, where you feel like
you need it, You feel like you need to have
a little bit because you're definitely more opening to me,
you know, the last I would say six weeks as
far as telling me like how.
Speaker 4 (11:56):
You came well, just because I want you to know
how I'm feeling. Sure, do I think? I mean it's
comforting for sure, But I again, it's not something I'm
trying to be more conscious and make a bigger effort
for you too, if that makes sense.
Speaker 2 (12:13):
Yeah, does it bring comfort to you? What does it
bring comfort to you to know that we are spending
a little bit more time like I feel like I've been.
One of the things I've been trying to do is
I've been trying to spend more time with you.
Speaker 4 (12:27):
Well again, so to me, what means the most to
me is you being present and not being on your
phone and being present in the moment. It has nothing
to do with physical touch. I literally could be just
like last night when I was sitting on the couch
across from you and talking to you and you were
being present. That means more to me than anything else.
(12:49):
So we for and then I'm trying to make it
also good for you, so holding your hand and doing
something stuff like that, that's not.
Speaker 2 (13:03):
So my My part of the deal is that I
just got to be more present and not be on
my phone or watching TV or anything like that. Just
be more just more.
Speaker 3 (13:14):
Yeah, more oppressive to the moment, which is very hard.
Speaker 2 (13:18):
I gotta get better at it. I listen, I take
total ownership of it. My problem though, is I've taken
total ownership of it for years, and it always says
ended up in being something that.
Speaker 4 (13:30):
Well, it's hard, I think they Well, it's you have
an addiction to your phone number one, and you are
easily distracted, like you always like to say, well, I
have add I have adhd well, then fix it like
if because it just makes you. It makes me feel
like the phone is more important than what is going on,
(13:54):
like anytime you answer the phone and we're together, or
the other night when we were with Joe and Alyssa
and you got a FaceTime phone call and literally Joe
was in the middle of the sentence and he looked
at me and he's like, are you fucking kidding me
that he just did that?
Speaker 3 (14:08):
And I said, welcome.
Speaker 2 (14:09):
To my world, and you know you pointed that out.
And this is something Joe doesn't listen to this podcast,
but he should because it really was awesome how you
said you've always done this with me in raising the kids,
that you would in the moment not try to make
me look bad, but then the next day find the
(14:34):
proper time to basically happy just you and I.
Speaker 4 (14:37):
Except Joe's an adult, and I like he needs to know,
like that's that I was disappointed disappointed for him at
that moment. And I think it's when if he was
little out of said oh, Dad has to get that
phone call because it's important for work, or he didn't
mean to cut you off. And take a stupid phone
call that it really doesn't matter. But you know, he's
(14:59):
an adult.
Speaker 2 (15:00):
You did a great job, allay.
Speaker 4 (15:01):
He needs to know that that's rude and don't don't
do that in your relationship because it makes up He
felt like his story was not as important as really
a phone call that could have You could.
Speaker 3 (15:15):
Have talked to the people another time.
Speaker 2 (15:17):
Yeah, I will say this to you, and this is
I give you. I do give you a lot of
credit for a lot of things. And honestly, you've been
such a great wife at making me a better dad,
and I have taken to the things that you've said
when it deals with the kids, and then you'll tell
(15:40):
me things that will make me a better husband, and
for some reason I don't.
Speaker 3 (15:44):
And you don't listen.
Speaker 2 (15:46):
No, I hear you, but I don't do a good
job of doing it. And I don't know what it is.
I'm aware of it. Now.
Speaker 4 (15:55):
You're not a horrible husband, Like, yeah, you're not a
horrible I am, but I I'm telling you that you're not.
Speaker 5 (16:01):
You're not.
Speaker 4 (16:01):
But no, but there are things that you can do better,
and there's things that I can do better.
Speaker 3 (16:08):
You know.
Speaker 4 (16:10):
The common thread on my side that I've always asked
for is attention and not like look at me. I
want to be the center of the universe. It's can
we have a talk? You don't hear And I don't
take this personally because you do it, and I think
it's part of a hazard of your job. When you
are working in the studio, you're running a board, you're
(16:32):
looking at different computer screens, and you the reason you're
so good at your job is because you are three
steps ahead of the conversation.
Speaker 3 (16:41):
You know where you want it to go. You know
where you want it to end.
Speaker 4 (16:45):
Because your break is so long, You've got you know,
six to twelve minutes, whatever you're whatever in your head.
Speaker 3 (16:51):
You have how you want this to go. The problem
is when.
Speaker 4 (16:55):
That comes home and you are not pro in our conversation.
And I don't think this is exclusive to you. This
is just you know, our dynamic, but you aren't present
because it's again, I see it when you talk to
your friends and when.
Speaker 3 (17:11):
You it's just you and it's not malicious.
Speaker 4 (17:13):
The reason that I give you grace or give you
a little because I know you're not doing it to
be mean, and I know it's just you do I
wish that it was a little bit better. Yeah, but
you know, it's just who you are.
Speaker 2 (17:29):
I've been told, and it probably is true that I've
always known that the people that I do that too
will be there for me sure and be okay with it,
and until one day they're not, and that will be
the time that will hurt me the most.
Speaker 3 (17:46):
Do you think it will because I died or a.
Speaker 2 (17:48):
Well, I'm hoping it's not. I'm hoping it's not.
Speaker 3 (17:52):
And then what music will you be playing?
Speaker 2 (17:56):
Let's say on a happier note. Yes, we went to
a wedding this weekend.
Speaker 1 (18:00):
We did.
Speaker 2 (18:01):
We got a chance to go and see Luke Shilling
and Kayla. I have no idea what her last name is.
Speaker 3 (18:08):
Now it's chilling, but now it's chilling.
Speaker 2 (18:10):
But Luke and Kayla got married. That's Jed from The
Joe Show's brother Luke. And it was so fun to
see the Shillings and being able to be there. It
was also really nice we had to spend time with
Joe and his fiancee Alyssa. And this is the part
that's interesting because let's not talk about funerals, Let's talk
about weddings. Because a lot of Joe and Alyssa's wedding
(18:34):
was coming up with us because we spent a three
hours basically driving an hour and a half. It seemed
like wedding and from the wedding, and it was interesting
because you were you were kind of vocal about their
wedding and what you wanted to see at their wedding. No, well,
(18:55):
you said you gave a couple of things that you
asked for.
Speaker 3 (18:58):
I gave one thing that I asked I have.
Speaker 2 (19:01):
I have explained that.
Speaker 4 (19:02):
I have said, there's just I want this one song
if we I let them listen to the song. And
I said, if I only ask for one thing, can
we play this song and then have people come up
and pray over you guys as a couple, do you
want to share with It's called the blessing? So that's
I did not ask for a couple of things I have.
(19:25):
I am staying so far out of this wedding because
it is about Alissa and and Joe. It's his wedding too,
but I know it's a day like for her and her.
Speaker 2 (19:39):
Mom.
Speaker 4 (19:40):
So I you need to be very careful with what
you say because I have asked.
Speaker 2 (19:45):
For only what Although you said you're going to get it.
You're going to do a toast? Are you going to
do that? Or is that not a joke?
Speaker 3 (19:52):
Said that to you?
Speaker 2 (19:53):
Yeah?
Speaker 4 (19:53):
Yeah, I kind of half joking because I know you
can't handle it if people don't ask you to do something,
because you would want to to be the one giving
a toast.
Speaker 2 (20:01):
I don't get to do shit, do it, but not.
Speaker 3 (20:03):
Really get to pay for a part of the wedding.
That's all you got.
Speaker 2 (20:08):
I love the idea of what you want to do
though with the blessing, because I think that that's kind
of that. That's cool. Do you do you really want
them married in a church? Do you really feel like
they need to be married in a church? Well?
Speaker 4 (20:21):
What i'd really what I really want is for them
to have a direction in which this is going. I mean,
I think I want them to figure out what religion
this is based in. I want them.
Speaker 3 (20:36):
I think that they.
Speaker 4 (20:36):
Should know this by now. They should they should have
known it before they booked anything. But I'm not involved
in it, and I'm staying out of it. I am
pushing some form of religion because I think that that
is important. Now, if they decide that it's not important,
they have been saying to me multiple times that it
(20:58):
is important to them, but they're still not doing anything.
So also I am backing off because again, it is
not my wedding, it is not my daughter, it is
my son.
Speaker 3 (21:09):
And she did say to me, you know, I want
you involved.
Speaker 4 (21:11):
I want you to be a part of this because
it is Joe's day two and I thought that that
was very sweet for her to say, because I've had
other mother of grooms that will say, you know, she
doesn't even include us or and she has been very
inclusive with me. She asked, she invited me to go
out wedding dress shopping with them. I couldn't go because
(21:32):
it was Mother's Day with Luke. But she's been very
inclusive in those things. But also I am trying to
be extremely sensitive to make sure that they know this
is her day and I because I can be very opinionated,
you know, I'm but I really but I have not
been with them.
Speaker 3 (21:52):
Yeah, I have been very this is about them and
not me.
Speaker 2 (21:58):
Do you do you think when Alissa says I want
you to be involved, that she's doing that because she
just wants you to feel included, or do you think
part of it though could be that she does want
you involved.
Speaker 4 (22:13):
I think it's I think it is important to her
because she sees the relationship that Joe and I have
that it is important because she knows it's important to Joe,
so therefore it's important to her. Yeah, and so that's why.
And I appreciate that she does it. But again, and
(22:34):
I cannot say it enough because I don't want to
be that mother in law that is saying anything. Ask
me and I'll do but I will not say it
should be this way or you should do this.
Speaker 5 (22:46):
I have.
Speaker 4 (22:48):
Talked to them before about finances and they have chosen
their direction that they want to go, and I have
to respect it and not come in and say it.
Not come in and save the day, but let them.
I think this is an important thing. And this is
where you and I will probably have some disagreements because
(23:10):
when you make a decision and you decide to have
it a certain way, they need to, you know, yeah,
do it.
Speaker 2 (23:19):
It's funny watching these two go through what they're going through,
and it's been a process. It's been a long process.
I mean, it's not like they're quick to do it,
because their wedding's not for over a year the day
that they chose. But it's wild because it made me
think a lot about you and I. Ours was similar.
(23:41):
We did not We got engaged and we had a
pretty long engagement year and a half. Yeah, I mean
that was It's weird because I don't know what the
times were then of was.
Speaker 4 (23:54):
That norm, but so we still were so young. I
think both of our families encouraged to have long, a.
Speaker 2 (24:01):
Long engagement, and these guys are doing it that same
way too, And I think that there's some similarities that
make me think a lot, you know, about what well.
I think that there's some similarities in the fact that
it's a longer engagement. I think there's some similarities in
the fact that we would like religion to be part
of this thing. Are My dad actually wasn't so much
(24:24):
he wanted religion. He actually asked for us, specifically to
get married in a Catholic church. Like that was some
and you're not Catholic, So that was amazing that you
were willing to do that. You were very flexible in
the fact that I was very young, but it was
not something that your parents wanted.
Speaker 3 (24:42):
No, I was very young.
Speaker 4 (24:44):
I mean it was that I got married We did
get married in the church that my mom grew up in,
so it wasn't hard for me to But my parents
were Christian, and you were raised Catholic, and it was
not only was important to your dad, it was important
to your sisters. And I was young, very young, and
(25:06):
I was trying to please everyone except for my family.
So I look back on that and I think, and
I don't regret it. By the way, of course, I
didn't regret getting married in a Catholic church. I had
to promise to raise my kids in the or to
baptize them in the Catholic religion, which I did. All
three were baptized in a Catholic church, but they all
were dedicated in a Christian church too. I felt like
(25:29):
I could finally buy then I could have a little voice.
Speaker 3 (25:31):
Of my own.
Speaker 4 (25:32):
I look back on it now, and I don't know
that I would have gotten married in a Catholic church.
You know, it's not I probably would have gotten married
in a Christian church, but I just I want it
to be and Joe and Alyssa both have said that
they want God in it. I can't tell them how
(25:56):
to do it. I'm trying to give them like asking questions,
have you thought of this? Have you thought of that?
Speaker 3 (26:02):
Have you gone and visited a church?
Speaker 4 (26:04):
We can start with that question, do you know where
a church isn't let me show you what one looks like.
But they and again, so it's one thing for them
to say it, it's another thing for if it is
important to them. Because if they're saying it just to
make me happy, or you happy, or her mom happy,
this isn't about us.
Speaker 3 (26:25):
It's about them.
Speaker 4 (26:27):
I would like God to be a part of their marriage,
but that it is about them. And I also where
I didn't feel comfortable because I was super young. It
was hard for me to say this is stay out
of my business. You know what this is and that's
your family my family. Now I have no problem saying it.
Speaker 2 (26:48):
I don't change.
Speaker 3 (26:49):
I know age and.
Speaker 4 (26:51):
I got cancer, so I have no problem. And I
don't want to be for seen my opinion and what
I think should happen. That's why I am so careful
with what I say to them. I may I make
them ask me something before I don't put my two
(27:12):
cents in. You know, there was one thing when she
one thing I did tell her was ah, because they
are paying for the majority of the wedding. You and
I are helping with a good chunk, but they are
paying for the majority of it.
Speaker 3 (27:28):
And so that's why I feel I can give a little.
Speaker 4 (27:34):
Bit of input, you know, not for any reason other
than we were talking about it and she's like, I
just know that it's going to be them, you know,
ever since I was little. It's going to be the
best day of my life. And I said, it's not.
It's actually not the best day of your life. And
I'm going to tell you why. The best day of
(27:54):
your life, it's a day that you have a child,
the best day of your life because it's your wedding
is really over before it begins.
Speaker 3 (28:04):
It's a blur of a day. Yes.
Speaker 4 (28:06):
Is it a beautiful day, yes? Is it a special day, yes,
But it's not the best day. And it's funny because
then I thought, oh, should I have said that, because
I don't want to take away And I talked to
a couple of my friends and every single friend of
mine was like, no, not the best day.
Speaker 3 (28:24):
It's not the best day because it just really isn't.
Speaker 4 (28:26):
It's a great day, but it's you work up to
this day and literally again, it is over before it begins.
It's such a blur. It's an important day, but it's
not the best day. There are so many days that
you will look back and think, oh my gosh, this
one percent was better than my wedding day. And you
(28:50):
you know, we talked to them about getting counseling because
marriage is extremely difficult and they're in this fun phase
of planning this beautiful day that they're going to have.
Their wedding will be beautiful, and it will be a
beautiful day, but the reality of it is, you know,
then life kicks.
Speaker 3 (29:10):
In and marriage is hard. Marriage is really really hard.
You know.
Speaker 2 (29:17):
Wise thoughts from a wise lady. If we got married today,
you were going to say that, no, hold on, let
me get some more songs here, Meredith Brooks, bitch, uh.
Speaker 3 (29:32):
Uh, if we got married today, I like that.
Speaker 2 (29:35):
I like that one as a song.
Speaker 4 (29:37):
See this is okay, okay, back on track. If we
got married today, No.
Speaker 2 (29:42):
If we got If we got married today, I know
things would be so different because I think both you
and I would have more voices to be able to
say something.
Speaker 4 (29:51):
I also feel that you you are a people pleaser
and you really care about what your family thinks.
Speaker 3 (29:59):
And what a other people think. I don't care.
Speaker 2 (30:02):
I know you don't care, and I wish I had
a little bit more of you in me. I do
think you do care. No, I do think you do
care because I think that you. Here's the deal. You
don't care about anything that other people think except.
Speaker 3 (30:19):
My children, your children. Yeah, that's true. I do.
Speaker 4 (30:23):
I do.
Speaker 3 (30:23):
I do care about three people's opinions. Yeah.
Speaker 2 (30:26):
And if Joe, Jacob or Luke said, Mom, this is
what I'm gonna do, it may be hard pill for
you to swallow, but I think that you as long
as it didn't hurt them obviously or whatever you would say.
Speaker 4 (30:42):
We've had a couple of those moments already where I
have they have made decisions that I didn't fully agree with.
But what I have learned and what I have done
is I will say, you know what, I don't agree
with that. I just want you to hear me out why,
and we have a great discussion because I don't want
to feel like I feel as their parent, you know.
(31:05):
But then when then they go on and their decision
is made, and it is my job to support them,
and it is my job to stand behind them and
just talk shit about it to you do you do?
Speaker 2 (31:18):
I told you so, I told you so.
Speaker 3 (31:21):
I will never do and I told you so. But
I'll just look at him like.
Speaker 2 (31:26):
That look.
Speaker 3 (31:27):
But I'll never say I told you so.
Speaker 2 (31:28):
The look that I get every night when I say, hey,
you want.
Speaker 3 (31:31):
To that's just a hand in her face.
Speaker 2 (31:34):
Now, all right, What a weekend, What a weekend? What
a podcast? By the way, shout out to the nice
lady that we sat behind on the airplane. Yeah, I said,
I guess I'm not getting a podcasts.
Speaker 3 (31:48):
She was very nicely, very nice. Yes, thank you for
saying hello to both of us.
Speaker 2 (31:52):
I appreciate it, and I hope she doesn't mind. But
I was listening to her conversation with the lady next
to her, and her son is an airline pilot.
Speaker 3 (31:59):
Such a nosy nosy I am
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