The Vegetable Orchestra and Seinfeld Night

00:00 Introduction and First Story: The 20-Foot Python
01:02 Second Story: The Generous Seat Swap
01:52 Third Story: Antelope Reintroduction in Kenya
02:30 Fourth Story: The Vegetable Orchestra
03:19 Fifth Story: Seinfeld Night at the Brooklyn Cyclones Game
 


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Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:03):
Caloroga Shark Media. There, I'm shining Mack with five good
news stories. I'm laughing because I'm not really sure this
first story's good news, but I like the weird stories
too well. Good news if you like snakes. And La
Willman pulled into the parking garage and she noticed something
on top of the dumpster. It was twenty feet long.

(00:24):
Can you guess what it was? That's right, a snake,
a python to be specific. Teresa got home and was like, hey,
what's that? And it was indeed a twenty foot python.
She called the cops. They were like, call animal control.
She said, I tried and couldn't get through to animal control.
The cops were like, snake wrangling isn't what we do,
So they had a call Joseph, the Southern California Reptile Hunter.

(00:46):
The reptile hunter got the snake and took it away
to be examined by a vet. They think it was
perhaps possibly maybe ill and had been abandoned in the trash.
Pythons are not native to the United States, but a
lot of people keep them as pets. Throw away your pets.
That's not cool. On a plane. A senior citizen suffers
from claustrophobia. The senior citizen offered a man in the

(01:07):
aisle seat one hundred bucks to switch seats. He was like,
now I'm good, not that he's being a jerk about
the seat, not that he wouldn't give up the seat.
He didn't want the money. The one was like, take
the hundred bucks, and now I'm good. No, take the
hundred bucks. She eventually told him to give some of
the money to his kids as a lesson that being
kind bring rewards. The man explained. As I approached my seat,
an elderly lady was having a hard time getting her

(01:29):
bag in the overhead, so I offered to help. She
ended up being in one D. I was one se
This must have been one of those four seaters, right,
because otherwise C and D would both be aisles, wouldn't they. Yeah,
she immediately said she'd pay me one hundred dollars to
swap seats because she feels claustrophobic in the window seats. Yep,
there you go, bigo. Once you read the story, head
Johnny Maack in this particular seat configuration, even though I
prefer an aisle seed, I told her I'd gladly switch

(01:51):
for free good news if you were an antelope in Kenya.
Seventeen mountain bongos have been flown to Kenya from the
Rare Species Conservation Center in Florida for eventual reintroduction into
their natural habitat in Kenya. Mountain bongos are a subspecies
of bungo, which, as you know, are the largest of
the forest dwelling antelopes. Scientists believe that the mountain bongo

(02:14):
became a four species when climate change turned savannah areas
into forests thousands of years ago. The last time a
shipman of animals this big made it to Kenya was
two thousand and four, when eighteen animals arrive safely. Those
guys successfully integrated with the wild population. Scientists are site
congratulations to the orchestra that plays instruments made from vegetables.

(02:35):
They learned Ann his world record. The Vegetable Orchestra and
eleven Piece Orchestra, formed in Vienna in nineteen ninety eight,
has performed a total of three hundred and forty four
concerts using specifically made instruments like a carrot recorder, a
cucumber phone, a radish base flute, percussive pieces of eggplant
and of course a leak violin. The orchestra on their

(02:56):
website explains, we believe that we can produce a sound
that cannot easily be produced by other instruments. You can
hear the difference. It sometimes sounds like animals, sometimes just
like abstract sounds. The orchestra does have a request please
stop asking if they're vegetarians. They said on their website,
no we are not. Don't ask again. We've heard this

(03:17):
question three million times, and you just see this one
in Brooklyn at the Brooklyn Cyclones game. They're a minor
league baseball team. They had their annual Seinfeld Night this year.
They had people do the Elaine Bennis dance, remember that
from the Seinfeld episode. I don't even know how I
would describe it. It's not a very attractive dance. George
Costanza once described it as a full body dry heave

(03:40):
set to music. Congratulations to Olivia, a New York based actress.
She was named the winner of the contest. Fans attending
Seinfeld Knight also received a limited edition creamer bobblehead. Those
are your five good news stories for today. Have a
good one.