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October 1, 2025 2 mins
US President Donald Trump has released what he claims to be the best music of all time. The Album, which features a wide range of styles from crooning to thrash metal shows off the President’s full music talent, and has been heralded by music critics as "all right if you like that sort of thing",

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Episode Transcript

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Speaker 1 (00:03):
Around the world, around your country, around your parts. This
is headline addition.

Speaker 2 (00:16):
With the Ed Parnell, a computer science student, has discovered
he can communicate with women. For decades, it was thought
impossible for the Kings of coding to make conversation with girls,
but Frank Lewis has managed last Wednesday to have a
six part interaction with a lady in a bar, starting
with sorry, whatsa perfume? The back and forth continued, impressing
his gang of friends who stood carrying in awe in

(00:38):
the shadows. Mister Lewis is now known as mister Loverman
by the universe and his crew, who have erected a
temporary statue in the canteen to celebrate his remarkable achievement.
Historians have long researched what happened to the Romans. They
took over Britain enough flurry of enthusiasm and action, yet
disappeared only a couple of hundred years later. Now archaeologists

(00:59):
have said on the theory that the Italian invaders were
in fact entirely imaginary, made up by lonely men sat
in their room wondering about something, and backed up by
films played and the homo erotic costumes that they're always
depicted as wearing. Happy shopper spaghetti has long been thought
to be completely inedible, but now the issues of the
ever growing numbers of unopened tins may in fact have

(01:21):
been sold. Researchers have found that the product may well
be best employed not feeding the hungry, the poorer, or
the disenfranchised throughout the world, but by throwing the tins
at charging bears. The National Television Presenter Awards took place
last night with the surprise of warden appearance by long
time dead Aim and Andrews Andrews who has voted most
recognizable television face of a generation, but judges feared he

(01:43):
would be unable to collect his trophy, owing to being
dead since nineteen eighty seven. However, hearty work from Anton
Deck managed to dig up the corpse of the Irish
Legends and via a complex series of levers, pulleys, ropes
and wheelbarrows, managed to get what remains of Andrews across
the stage to elect is Just Rewards. His address, however,
was disappointing, with the former This is Your Life host

(02:05):
losing an ear, one hand and a jawbone during his
acceptance speech. US President Donald Trump has released what he
claims to be the best music of all time. Nobody
has ever heard anything like this, said the President of
the United States. The album, which features a wide range
of styles from light crooning to thrash metal, shows off
the president's full musical talent and has been heralded by

(02:28):
some music critics as or right, if you like that
sort of thing, that's headline edition.

Speaker 1 (02:36):
I met Parnell
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