Join me for this candid conversation between two seasoned professional coaches as we chat about current industry challenges, marketing your business as a coach and staying in integrity.
In this episode, we talk about:
Connect with Robyn MacNeill here: https://www.instagram.com/robyn.macneill/
Learn more about Robyn and her work here: https://robynmacneill.com/
Connect with Lauren Ashley here: https://www.instagram.com/coachlaurenashley/
Join Lauren’s free Facebook or Telegram community and receive my weekly IT'S A VIBE email with tips to help you build an Aligned, Magnetic and Profitable™ business here: https://coachlaurenashley.com/?tcb_lightbox=lightbox-homepage
In this episode, we talk about:
- Embracing our multi-passionate natures as business owners and Manifesting Generators
- Niching down, pivoting and struggling to fit into boxes as a multi-passionate entrepreneur
- Robyn breaks down the numbers on Million Dollar Coaching Businesses (and what’s ACTUALLY happening behind the scenes)
- Changing titles as you evolve and identifying what type of coach you are
- What REALLY matters when growing your coaching business
- Setting boundaries as a coach: Should you be giving your client’s more access?
- How Robyn and I use TRUE coaching skills to help our clients grow their businesses
- Attracting ideal clients through shared beliefs rather than tactics
Connect with Robyn MacNeill here: https://www.instagram.com/robyn.macneill/
Learn more about Robyn and her work here: https://robynmacneill.com/
Connect with Lauren Ashley here: https://www.instagram.com/coachlaurenashley/
Join Lauren’s free Facebook or Telegram community and receive my weekly IT'S A VIBE email with tips to help you build an Aligned, Magnetic and Profitable™ business here: https://coachlaurenashley.com/?tcb_lightbox=lightbox-homepage
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:05):
Welcome to the Aligned and Magnetic Podcast. I'm your host,
Laura Ashley, intuitive business coach certified by the International Coaching Federation,
and they call me the Money, Mindset and Manifestation Queen.
I take a spiritual and practical approach that's backed by
neuroscience to help you make your vision a reality, but
(00:25):
more importantly, doing it in a way that lights you
the fuck up. If you're ready to create an aligned,
magnetic and profitable business so you can live a life
and do the work you are absolutely in love with,
You're in the right place. Get ready to hear the
powerful questions and raw lessons that you need to create
success your way. Thank you so much for being here.
(00:48):
Let's dive in Hi Loves. We are back for another
episode of the Aligned to Magnetic podcast. Today we have
Robin who is joining us. We're just going to have
a conversation about you know, business, and I don't know,
I feel like we align on so many different conversations
and topics. So we're just gonna have a conversation and
(01:10):
I'm yeah, I think it's gonna be really good. So
just for context, I mean, I feel like I've kind
of aligned with you. Robin, because we're both manifesting generators, right,
and so I can see like a lot of similarities
in our marketing and how we show up. It's more of,
I think, an underlying thing that's, you know, we're multi
(01:32):
passionate and it's hard to put ourselves in a box.
And I feel like that's like the theme that I
that I see.
Speaker 2 (01:40):
Mm hmmm, it's like the thing I struggle with the moust.
Speaker 1 (01:45):
Yeah, yeah, And it's just it's I don't know how
you feel about this, but I feel like, you know,
I've been able to surpass that whole box before, and
like I always find my way back to like it
doesn't matter. We don't have to in a box, Like
we can just do it however we want. And then
no matter how many times I've like gone through that,
(02:06):
I don't know if you feel the same way, but
there's inevitably always a moment where it's like time to
shift or pivot, and it's like I have to put
myself back in this box or like really define who
I am and how I'm I guess marketing myself or
promoting myself or sharing my offer.
Speaker 3 (02:25):
I think that that's the key, though, is if we
didn't have to market ourselves, we wouldn't care as much,
right Like, when we're working with clients, it doesn't matter
because that multi passionate nature really helps us to see
things from different perspectives and be able to ask the
right questions to our clients. But yeah, it's all about
(02:46):
marketing and I'm going through it right now, or even yesterday,
I was like, am I talking about too many things?
Am I not focused enough?
Speaker 2 (02:56):
Is this what the problem is? I?
Speaker 1 (02:58):
Yes, I was just talking to one of my peers
and clients and colleagues, Ashley, because we just did this
masterclass on burnout, and I was looking at my feed
and I'm like, coaching business burnout, and I'm like, and
my brain started to feel overwhelmed. And I was like, man,
(03:20):
if I'm feeling overwhelmed, you know, how's my audience feeling
about that? You know? Like, how is that translating in
my social media presence? So yeah, I think I think
we all go through it.
Speaker 3 (03:34):
It's actually funny that you say that, because I was
actually thinking back to a launch I did early or
late spring.
Speaker 2 (03:40):
I guess where.
Speaker 3 (03:41):
I carefully thought out the sequence of what I was
going to talk about, and I would say it was
probably harder with the same result as I would have
got if I had just done it off the cuff, right.
So it's really interesting that even even with all of
the like different topics that we put out there, that
(04:05):
somehow our audience still gets us, Like different things are
going to resonate with different people, and for whatever reason
they see, they.
Speaker 2 (04:15):
Still they still listen, they still come right.
Speaker 3 (04:18):
Like, yeah, my engagement, my open rates are still better.
I was actually looking at mine compared to somebody with
five thousand more followers, and I'm getting better engagement that
I can visually see than somebody with seven thousand, eight
thousand followers, And that's like, that's kind of incredible to
(04:38):
me because so I must be saying something right. And
I feel the same about yours. Like watching your content.
Speaker 2 (04:42):
I'm like, yeah, no, I get it. It all makes
sense to me.
Speaker 1 (04:46):
Yeah, It's almost like I feel like it's the voice
of like the strategic business coaches out there that kind
of comes into my brain that's like, oh, you're not
getting these results that you want, and like that's even
subjective because I'm like, well, what are the results that
(05:08):
I want? And like, you know what I mean. And
then I'm like, am I even working toward those results
right now? Like what's the purpose? And so it's interesting
when we just like step back a moment and really
look at what we're doing and feel into all of
the things that we have to offer, and just like
(05:28):
ask ourselves, where's that voice coming from? For me? Anyway?
I don't know. You can speak to your experience, but
it's like, yeah, who's telling us that we have to
stick to one topic or that we have to niche down?
Like Niching has never really resonated for me. I tried it. It
didn't work.
Speaker 3 (05:49):
Yeah, Yeah, yeah, I had to. I had to niche
my ideal client, I think more than anything. And I
think that helped, Yeah, because then I could be broad
in how I serve them. But I understand I need
exactly who I serve. But yeah, Niching into something. Yeah,
(06:10):
Oh my gosh, the amount of titles I've had over
the last four years.
Speaker 1 (06:14):
Yeah, let's talk about that. I've had a number of
titles too over the last four or five years.
Speaker 2 (06:22):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (06:22):
What's it like to go through that transition like all
the time?
Speaker 3 (06:30):
Okay, So I think there's always that part of you
that's like again, I'm.
Speaker 2 (06:35):
Switching it again.
Speaker 3 (06:39):
And I even made a promise once to my coaching
supervisor that I would stick with a title for longer
than three months, and I did not for that one anyways.
Speaker 2 (06:48):
But I soon after found.
Speaker 3 (06:52):
Identity coaching really was what I think fully enveloped what
I was doing with my clients. Like I am a
business person, I have an ample amount of business executive
leadership coaching experience outside of the online industry, and I
(07:13):
get clients all the time that come to me for business,
but what they walk away with is not just business,
and more often than not, it is this focus on them,
the person that's in front of me, and we go
on this voyage of self discovery and really reclaiming that
identity that I think that we put on to ourselves.
(07:34):
And I think, you know, tying this back to these
many shifts and the many changes that I've had in
my titles, I kept focusing my purpose on what I
was doing and not who I was. And as soon
as I realize that that, I just need to shine
the light on who I am, which is so hard
(07:55):
when you're this person that's always like trying to be
that in the background and push others forward. To turn
that spotlight on yourself is incredibly uncomfortable. But once I
realized that and I could shift that message even for
my clients, everything kind of came together. And actually calling
myself an identity coach I has been the longest title
(08:18):
I've ever had. It's been over a year now that
I've had that, so crazy. Yeah, it's just kind of
interesting anything for anybody that struggles with us. And if
you're going through this pivoting from one title to the
next title to the next title, kind of pull back
and take a look at am I focusing too much
on my purpose being what I do versus.
Speaker 2 (08:38):
Who I am.
Speaker 1 (08:40):
I love that one of my clients is going through
that right now and she's you know, in the earlier
stages of business, and I'm like, honestly, this is normal
what you're going through. Like I pivoted so many times
from the moment I began, like even health coaching, right
and my business has transformed so much since then, and
(09:00):
it's natural. I think we grow so much in the beginning.
And I love what you said there about you know,
not identifying so deeply with the title, but more so
the purpose, because that's exactly what it is. I mean,
we're going to send ourselves for loops if we continue
to try to like define you know, who we are
(09:22):
based on like what we call ourselves. So yeah, just
really focusing on putting your best self out there and
like your message, and that doesn't really doesn't really matter
what title you give yourself. You know. It's funny. I
just finished business coaching with this one coach and I
remember this one coaching call that we had together, and
(09:44):
there was so much focus. I didn't realize this till after.
There was so much focus and like hyper fixation around
what I'm calling myself, and I'm like, when I got
off the call, I was like, wait, but like that
doesn't matter to me. I would like, I don't care
what I call myself, Like people are going to come
(10:04):
to me for the message and the content I'm putting
out there.
Speaker 2 (10:08):
Yeah, one hundred percent.
Speaker 3 (10:09):
Like I wish that was the message that we were
hearing more. Yeah, because I think that that happens so often,
where people get so hyper fixated on what to call
yourself and what your Instagram bio should.
Speaker 2 (10:22):
Look like, like gives a fuck?
Speaker 1 (10:25):
Yeah?
Speaker 2 (10:26):
Can I swear on this podcast?
Speaker 1 (10:27):
Yes?
Speaker 3 (10:27):
Yes, yes, because I will Yeah, yeah, yeah, it just
it is one of those things like if somebody is
hiring you based on what they're seeing in your Instagram,
like they're probably not the best client for you because
they haven't really listened to your message and understood who
you are as a person and if you're a good
fit for them. Like these messages that you see of
(10:49):
mentors saying, oh, somebody dropped into my DM on a
Thursday and they're paying me in full for a twenty
thousand dollars one to one on on Friday, is like
so unreal to me. And I take a look at
that and I think automatically, like is that even going
to be the right client for you? Or is this
gonna be one of those situations where they don't they
(11:12):
jump too quickly, didn't understand what they were getting into,
didn't really fully vet you as the best person for
them in this moment, and become a problematic client. And right,
you're the mentor too that's always complaining about problematic clients
and people defaulting on payments like that's why.
Speaker 1 (11:30):
Yeah, And it's so interesting, like I always think too,
because I mean I've had results coming quickly and clients
show up out of nowhere. But like you said, my
process isn't like fill in an application, decide the next
day that you're in, and like pay the day after that.
And I've actually, yeah, when I see that happening, I'm
(11:53):
like part of me is like how can I get there?
But at the same time, I'm like, that's like the
lazy set to me, you know, the lazy side that
like just wants to like be in bed and like
make money from bed and like not do anything. But
the heart center, like the real version of me, when
I'm like my best self and I want to show
(12:15):
up an impact knows that like I got to do
my part in connecting with my future clients and like
actually seeing if we're a good fit. Because for me personally,
I can't tell if someone's a good fit just from
an application. Like yeah, I can get a good sense
and I can probably be like, yeah, this person would
(12:35):
be great, But when I get on the call with them,
and I know other people like teach you to sell
in the DMS or whatever, but I need to have
an actual conversation to be able to feel somebody out
and like really connect with them.
Speaker 3 (12:51):
Yeah, I agree with you. I even looking at my
client roster. Even the membership that I have is all
people that I've had conversations with. I think I've had
one person join who I've had I guess some conversations
in the DMS, and I didn't know her well, and
she joined, and then she's turning into a one to one,
(13:11):
which is great. But for the most part, I just
I'm always working with people I've talked to, and I
think it's fine, Like, would it be nice to have,
you know, hundreds of people jumping into it? Sure, right,
that would be, like you said, the easy thing. It
would feel good. But then I would feel really awkward
about serving those people. I think because for me especially,
(13:36):
I get so invested in my clients. It doesn't matter
if you're paying me seventy dollars a month or seven
hundred or whatever. I'm invested in your business pretty much
the same way. I may not give you as much
time for seventy dollars, but I'm still invested in what
you're doing. I still understand your business, I know your
(13:57):
business structure, I know your services. I can't do that
for people that I don't feel a connection with, I will.
I think I energetically repel those people anyway.
Speaker 1 (14:07):
Yeah, yeah, no, I one hundred percent agree with you
on that. And it's so interesting because you know, I
feel like everything that I learned in my first two
years of business, I feel like I'm just like I've
been undoing it all because there was so much conversation
around like boundaries and like, well, if someone's paying you
seventy dollars, then this is the structure that they fit in.
(14:29):
And I'm like, like, I hear that and it's valid.
And also as someone who's really here to serve and
support people, like that's just not you know what I mean,
it's just that Yeah.
Speaker 3 (14:46):
Like to that point, my intake form for the membership
is massive, and it makes them tell me every single
piece of their business. So they're walking into this membership
and I can see exactly how they're being siness operates
like you're not going to get that in other memberships,
Like that doesn't happen definitely not. That helps me to
(15:07):
be quicker at coaching them at mentoring, right, right, So
like why are we putting these boundaries?
Speaker 2 (15:12):
I would love to talk boundaries.
Speaker 1 (15:14):
Yeah, let's talk about boundaries.
Speaker 2 (15:17):
Boundaries.
Speaker 3 (15:18):
They I honestly like there are times for people who
are people pleasing and who are working outside of their contract.
And I think that this happens quite often for done
for youth services. Sure you need some boundaries when it
(15:39):
comes to coaching, I think that.
Speaker 2 (15:42):
Boundaries have become.
Speaker 3 (15:46):
Just like out of control, where people are boundarying themselves
into this little box and putting themselves up on a
pedestal so that their clients can't have access to them,
and then shaming them for one wanting access, for wanting more,
like those silly messages about my clients are so self
(16:06):
led they barely even use Boxer, they barely even use
the container.
Speaker 2 (16:12):
What why are they paying you? Then?
Speaker 3 (16:14):
Like, what are you there for? Aren't we as coaches
there to serve people, there to guide people, there to
be their sounding board? And it was really interesting because
I worked with a coach who had like a three
minute I didn't realize that's when I heard her, so
now I know better. But she had a three minute
limit on Boxer messages.
Speaker 1 (16:33):
I had someone like that too, and I was like,
what the fuck? My boxer messages are like ten minutes long.
Speaker 3 (16:39):
Right, I need to think this out so then I
would never message her and she'd be like why aren't
you messaging me? And I'm like, because I can't succinctly
message you in under three minutes on what I'm trying
to think of, Like I'm trying to process it enough myself.
But then like, what's the point why do I have
you if I'm self coaching?
Speaker 1 (16:58):
I wonder how many of these coaches with all of
these boundaries actually truly understand like ICF coaching.
Speaker 2 (17:07):
Oh, probably not, because I mean.
Speaker 1 (17:10):
We both know. I think we're both out loud like
verbal processors and yeah, I mean I feel like we've
both seen in the Coach Approach Academy and you've taken
other coaching programs as well, but we see the process
of coaching and it's like, you know, what we start
with over here is not always what we end with,
and it takes a lot of processing and like sometimes
(17:36):
just trying things on, you know, like sometimes I'll say
something and I'm like, oh, wait, that's not it. It's this,
but it has to come out to be able to
get to the thing that it.
Speaker 3 (17:45):
Is yep, one hundred percent. Yeah, And it's it's really
interesting for me. I didn't there was a time where
I was like, I'm not even going to offer boxer
coaching because I felt like it was a crutch.
Speaker 2 (17:58):
Yeah, and then I.
Speaker 3 (17:59):
Re examined how I was utilizing it, and I was
utilizing it more to answer questions, which as soon as
I shifted and utilizes it, utilize it more for coaching
and asking coaching questions and allowing them to go and
process and come back, all of a sudden it became easier.
And I start every coaching conversation now or coaching relationship
(18:24):
with having all of my clients get in there and
do a brain dum and for like, I love that. Yeah,
ninety percent of them have never ever done that before.
They've never had a coach allow them to do that.
Speaker 2 (18:35):
They have been boundaried into.
Speaker 3 (18:37):
This, like you have to only do two minutes, ten minutes,
five minutes, and I'm like, no.
Speaker 2 (18:43):
I want.
Speaker 3 (18:43):
I was like, if it takes you thirty minutes to
do this, do it. And I set aside that time
to listen and respond because it actually shows me how
their brain works, how their decision making works, how the
processing were, how well they're able to self coach themselves. Because,
as we know, the more you talk it out sometimes
(19:06):
the more you realize your own solution and it makes
the rest of the relationship easier. So on average, I'm
still only spending maybe an hour, hour and a half
a day supporting.
Speaker 2 (19:20):
My clients in Boxer.
Speaker 3 (19:21):
That's awesome, and that's with ten clients using it, right,
But if I put boundaries on it, I guarantee I'd
be spending a whole lot more time. Totally, totally, a
whole lot more back and forth. Like you said you're
gonna go Nope, that's not it, and then you've got
to think of your next two to three minute message,
and it's back and forth all day.
Speaker 1 (19:42):
Yeah, totally. Yeah, I can mirror that. I've never used
it as a brain dump, although I think my clients
do brain dump definitely to me, just not before a
call like that. But that's like, that's genius. I have
them kill out like a prep form so they like
get to reflect it ever everything. But I yeah, I
(20:02):
might try that.
Speaker 2 (20:03):
Yeah, I try it.
Speaker 3 (20:04):
I I used the form too, and I found like
they just couldn't process verbalize right.
Speaker 1 (20:10):
Yeah, yeah, that makes so much sense. But yeah, I
also noticed, like, so I stopped kind of. I didn't
ever stop using Boxer, although I thought about not using
Boxer and but what I noticed that when I was like,
I also had to shift my my process with it,
(20:31):
because my clients were coming to me like should I
do this or should I do this? Is this a
good idea? And that's when I had to start using
like the coaching questions because I was like, this is
not the purpose of any of this relationship. And it's
incredible how we can just shift the intention. Right. By
shifting the intention, it changes everything, right, Yeah.
Speaker 3 (20:53):
And I think that that also, I think for both
of us brings us back to our coaching roots and
really feeling like we are utilizing a proper coaching technique.
Speaker 1 (21:06):
While still teaching on business. Like this was the big
thing for me, Like, I know, you've kind of been
observing my whole transformation over the last two years. And
it's so funny because I released my new Paradigm CEO
Mastermind back in twenty twenty one, which was like definitely business.
(21:27):
But I was so gung ho about not offering or
teaching structure because structure had put me in so much
of a box that I was like, no, fuck structure,
We're not doing structure, Like we're going to be completely structureless.
And I would still teach frameworks, I guess, or like
(21:47):
here's generally how this works. But yeah, it's just so fascinating.
And then to come you know after two years later,
well it was probably like a year and a half actually,
like being brave enough to step into I'm still kind
of toying with what I call myself, but aligned business
coaching is what it is right now. But I had
(22:11):
so much resistance to calling myself a business coach because
of what the industry is, you know, But I just
like the more I work with my clients and hear
how empowered they feel, I just it makes me feel
so good that like I have surpassed that block that
(22:33):
was there for me and really figured out how to
like still teach business tools and strategies and make it
like customize to each client. And so what I realized
lately because I always like do the thing and then
I'm like, oh, this is what I'm doing, And so
(22:55):
I'm in that phase right now where I realize, like, wow,
I've created a massively experiential learning opportunity for clients. Like
instead of just coming and watching a masterclass for two
hours and taking notes and asking questions, it's like no
let's get into your content, let me provide you with feedback,
(23:19):
let me ask you a question and help you to
really think about how you're showing up and like presenting
yourself to people. And yeah, so that's where I'm at
with that. I don't know where that came from, but.
Speaker 3 (23:33):
Well, I know, I think what you're saying and what
I love about it is there can be a different
way to do business coaching, and I think that there is,
and I think we've kind of warped what business coaching
is and people believe that business coaching is all about money,
all about marketing, all about sales, and there's so much
(23:54):
more to that. And this is where people get into
those spirals and feeling a not good enough because they're
not hitting whatever magical number it is.
Speaker 2 (24:03):
This month and doing it in record time.
Speaker 3 (24:08):
But it's because, yeah, we've warped what business coaching is,
whereas like business coaching really should be focused on the
business in front of you. Yeah, giving them, like you said,
give them the tools, give them the theory, right, give
them the mindset tools that they need, because that's a
huge part of it too, the foundational structures, and then
(24:31):
they get to apply what works for them, and I
wish we did more of that because then we'd have
less people struggling in the first two three years of business.
Speaker 1 (24:40):
Well, and this is something I realized too, because I
was talking to one of my friends about it, Like
sometimes I'm really hard on myself because I'm like, man,
like I haven't done nearly what like this person's done,
you know, And I was in learning about business. I
started learning about business and building my business before other
people in my coaching cohort or group at the time did,
(25:06):
so I was technically ahead, but when it came to
my results, I felt so behind and at the same
time like I can see that and be like, well,
you know, my message would not be anywhere near what
it is today if I hadn't struggled. So I think
there's like a divine purpose for all of it. And
(25:28):
you know, their message gets to be like, oh, look
at all these fancy, flashy results like this is this
and this is this, and I'm a boss and I'm
killing it. And then, you know, when I really think
about it, like sure, sometimes it sucks that like I
haven't reached like I don't know, like a million dollars
in a year or something. Like that, but crazy numbers.
(25:52):
But yeah, it's just like when I really connect with
what it is that i'm doing, like I'm really hap
be with it, you know, when I'm really focused on
the work that I'm doing and not really looking at
those external results, which I feel like a lot of
us get sucked into. When I think about, like, Okay,
my bills are paid, like I've got what I need.
(26:15):
I'm really happy, like and the work that I'm doing
is really incredible. Can I just be okay with that?
You know?
Speaker 2 (26:23):
Yeah, yes, yes I can. I actually did the numbers once.
Speaker 3 (26:29):
I was running the numbers on what it would look
like for my business at two hundred and fifty thousand
versus five hundred thousand a year, and what I would
need team wise, what I would need, systems wise, et cetera,
et cetera, And when it came to my actual take
home pay, doubling my business revenue, I think I would
(26:53):
get in an extra five or ten thousand a year. Yeah,
but I would have to work more, I'd have to
manage more people. I would be a respont reponsible from our clients.
And I was like, you know what, Nope.
Speaker 2 (27:03):
I'm good.
Speaker 3 (27:04):
I think I know where my sweet spot is, right,
you look at those like I know, for me, there's
people that I've compared myself to in the past that
are making millions every year.
Speaker 2 (27:16):
And I look at that and I think, I actually
don't want that now.
Speaker 3 (27:20):
Yeah, But it's a hard because sometimes you're looking at
this and be like, how how.
Speaker 2 (27:24):
Are you getting?
Speaker 3 (27:26):
But that being said too, I think for certain people
that I've compared myself to, I wonder in three to
five years time if they will still be as profitable as.
Speaker 2 (27:37):
They are right now?
Speaker 3 (27:38):
Right, Yeah, Like, are we playing the long game by
building a foundation, figuring out who we are, figuring out
what we really want to focus on, what actual revenue
numbers want to be, and we're happier in the long run?
Speaker 2 (27:53):
Are we going to burn out? Right?
Speaker 1 (27:55):
And that's actually a common theme that I see in
those people who are doing those bigs like things in
their business, those big numbers and all of that, is
that they do end up burning out, and they do
end up like you know, hitting some sort of rock
bottom and then feeling lost and turned around and having
to go through some sort of like transformation, which I
(28:15):
don't think either is bad, it's just different you know.
So it's like I've never been willing. I'm I'll work
like I work a lot, and I think I kind
of was maybe like born to work a lot. But
I also am not willing to sacrifice myself, Like when
I'm feeling low, I'm not willing to push myself to
(28:37):
work just because I feel like I have to work,
you know. And I feel like that's really different from
other people, because you know, people will still I mean,
I still show up. I'm not like going to ghost
my business, but other people really like, yeah, just I
don't know, run themselves into the ground.
Speaker 3 (28:56):
So I agree, Yeah, and I think we don't need to.
We don't need to be doing that. I would rather
be taking it slower, being more consistent that This last
year for me was a year of slowing down. Yeah,
that's what I wanted to do. I stepped back from
having my own mentor coach other than a coaching supervisor
that I continually work with, and I really was just
(29:21):
focusing on Okay, like I've had all the ups and downs.
You get the ten K, once you get the twenty
k months, and then it's like three K and then
five K, like it. I didn't want that anymore. I
didn't want the uncertainty. So how do I create consistency?
And this is the first year that I can say
I consistently had the same revenue every single month, like
(29:41):
I didn't drop below a specific number. And that felt
so much better to me. It relieved I'd like so
much stress because, like you said, bills can be paid.
I can put money aside. I'm not sacrificing my life.
I'm not sacrificing my time. I'm not sacrificing time with
my daughter, my husband, And I'm happy serving. I'm like
(30:04):
way happier serving my clients than I was when you're
serving and struggling to make something happen that really you
didn't even need to be pushing for. So I think
in the long run, that's the lesson. I'm happy that
I learned, and I think it's going to serve me.
I can see myself being here ten twenty years from now,
(30:26):
still coaching and being incredibly happy with it and not
having to take on really any more clients than I
already have.
Speaker 1 (30:36):
I love that. Yeah, And I feel like, you know,
there's a couple of things that are coming up for me.
The one thing is numbers. People's numbers are not always
what they say they are, and I've had to kind
of My first coach told me this and I was like, oh,
that's weird because I'm such an honest person, like I
(30:57):
when I share numbers, I'm like, yeah, this actually happened
or is happening whatever. But there are other people who
kind of budge or like twist and don't tell the
whole story. And I've really been seeing more of that lately.
And you can even see like when people post testimonials,
(31:19):
they like wipe out the date that it was posted,
like you know, those screenshots or whatever. And I was like, huh,
that's interesting. That makes me trust them less, you know,
because I'm like, when was that posted? And even if
it was posted two or three years ago, who cares? Like,
but keep the date there so that people, yeah, be
transparent about your results. Right. So yeah, And I had
(31:43):
another client come to me and she was like, I know,
this girl that I worked with is fudging her numbers.
And then you know, there's I've heard of people like
buying a program but not having like lifetime access to it.
They had to keep paying a subscription fee to continue
accessing the material, and that seems like really unethical to
(32:05):
me unless it was you know, stated at the forefront.
But anyway, there's just like a lot of sometimes I
feel like the online space can be more of like
a hustle. And so the whole point of saying this
is like, for anyone listening, if you've ever felt not
enough or like your results aren't good enough, or you
(32:25):
have to like have these big you know, thirty K,
fifty K, one hundred K, two hundred k months or whatever.
Where was I going with that?
Speaker 3 (32:34):
Don't compare yourself because it's right, it's probably a lie.
Speaker 1 (32:38):
Yes, yeah, it could yeah, and maybe it could be
maybe not, but it could be, and we don't again,
we don't know the full story. So like, if they're
making two hundred k or five hundred k, let's say,
like how much of that are they actually taking home
and profiting off of?
Speaker 2 (32:52):
Yeah?
Speaker 3 (32:53):
So yeah, and I did that once. I went and
based on all the information that they had put forward,
took it and really like really pieced it apart to see, Okay, well,
how much you're making a million dollars, how much you're
actually going to put in your pocket?
Speaker 2 (33:09):
Yeah, and it was not much more than I do.
Yeah right, yeah really, And I've you know, same thing.
Speaker 3 (33:15):
I've had people who are calling themselves six figure business coaches,
seven figure business coaches, whatever, and they're getting in my
DMS and talking to me about coaching and saying that
like they haven't signed clients in six months and they're
struggling and stuff, And I'm like, but you're here and
you're telling.
Speaker 1 (33:28):
You can you call yourself that?
Speaker 2 (33:30):
Yeah?
Speaker 1 (33:31):
Yeah, and it's sad, Yeah yeah yeah.
Speaker 3 (33:35):
Just show And this goes back to like show who
you are. People want to work with you for who
you are, not necessarily the money that you've done. I
think money. And I actually wrote about this recently. It's
a double edged sword because yes, it's incredibly motivational. We
all need it, we all want it, we all need
it for safety and security of our person. But when
(33:58):
you are continually putting them message out, you're going to
also attract people who need it and need it desperately.
And yeah, that is no way to start a coaching relationship.
Speaker 1 (34:09):
Totally. Yeah. That feels very like not it feels kind
of like not erratic, but just like not stable, you know.
And if you can't build a business, you can't go
through a launch if you're like emotionally or literally unstable,
(34:29):
like if your mindset is unstable, you're like relying on
your results. That energy is gonna you know, transmute and
not necessarily that it like gets passed on to other people.
I mean, people can pick up stuff, but it I
think more so affects how we show up. Because these
people who are calling themselves six and seven figure coaches,
who haven't signed a client in six months, that I
(34:52):
think creates especially for people like us, who are honest
people and who are I guess like ethical or like
we have we just want to be like the best
version of ourselves and we want I think we pride
ourselves in being I guess transparent or there's something there
(35:14):
that we care we have there we go yeah. And
so I think that you know, when these six and
seven figure coaches are like sliding into your dms and
like I haven't you know, signed on a client in
a while, that is an integrity issue and that naturally,
you know, I talk about this as like resistance. It
naturally creates a resistance because what we're saying is not
(35:37):
in alignment with what is actually happening. And then I
think people just get lost in their brains like yeah,
and then how do you that pressure just comes from yourself, right,
you can literally take that pressure off by just choosing
to not identify with the money like that.
Speaker 2 (35:59):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (36:00):
So and that's the hard part because they see people
making lots of money or what they assume are people
that are making lots of money. So they feel like
that's the way that I get the clients. As if
I talk about this, I get the clients.
Speaker 2 (36:15):
Yeah, it's that vicious circle all over again.
Speaker 1 (36:17):
Totally. Let's talk about, like, I feel like these are
trends or like you know, patterns that have kind of
been in the business coaching industry or the coaching industry
as a whole, and I feel like people are kind
of starting to see through it.
Speaker 2 (36:34):
Yep.
Speaker 1 (36:35):
So let's talk about maybe like, Okay, how do you
promote yourself and like, you know, if you feel like
you're a multi passionate person, you don't want to put
yourself in a box. You don't want to overly identify
with your title or whatever. Like how do you show
up as like what I would call your most magnetic
self and like attract those people that are meant to
(36:58):
work with you.
Speaker 2 (36:59):
Yeah, I do.
Speaker 3 (37:00):
I know, first all, just be your magnetic self exactly,
so hard, right, but yeah, I mean that's part of
I think that's a big piece of it. Right, Like
I've had people come to me and say that they
wanted to come work with me simply because my energy
feels grounding and that's what they need, you know. On
(37:20):
the other side, like you still have to market and
say stuff. I think it's really for me, the answer
has been speaking to that ideal client, speaking to how
their brain operates, because I my client has a very
complex thinking process that results in overthinking imperfectionism. So being
(37:41):
able to talk about that so that it feels normal.
Speaker 1 (37:44):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (37:45):
So I think normalizing what your clients are feeling, sharing
that they're not the only ones who feel that way.
Speaker 2 (37:53):
Then it's been.
Speaker 3 (37:55):
About sharing that there's a solution and making that solution
look you. And that's kind of been my formula for it,
and I think that really helps because it's focused on them.
I think a lot of the marketing we've seen in
the past, especially with money especially I think specifically from
sales coaches who talk about their own sales like that's great,
(38:17):
but you're centering yourself in the conversation.
Speaker 2 (38:21):
Do you know how to teach that? Do you know
how to translate that to your clients?
Speaker 1 (38:26):
Totally?
Speaker 3 (38:27):
So I think for those that are doing well right now,
it's about centering it back on the client.
Speaker 2 (38:34):
What do they need to hear? What are they struggling with?
Like we all struggle this whole.
Speaker 3 (38:39):
I think idea of don't do pain point marketing. It's like, okay,
but don't be.
Speaker 2 (38:43):
An asshole about it.
Speaker 1 (38:44):
Yeah, you don't want to like stick a knife in
and like twist it around, but like to identify their
struggles and their challenges so we know what problem to
solve right exactly.
Speaker 3 (38:56):
Yeah, We're all going to hit roadblocks. That's just gonna happen.
We're human, We're not perfect.
Speaker 1 (39:04):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (39:04):
So I think really just speaking to where they're at
right now and making sure that they feel like they're
just not alone. And that has helped me because then
I can talk about any subject if I put it
within that framework. I can take that and we can
talk about imposter syndrome. But I can also go and
talk about your financial systems and how they're not you know,
(39:26):
working out the way you want them to. Or we
can take it and apply it to a marketing strategy
you're launching strategy like it doesn't matter, but they feel heard,
they feel seen, and they feel understood. And I think
even going back to our talk on boundaries, boundaries has
made people not feel seen and heard when we do too.
Speaker 2 (39:46):
Much of it.
Speaker 3 (39:47):
So bringing it back to the client making them feel
like they are part of something bigger.
Speaker 2 (39:53):
Yeah, that's how you do it.
Speaker 1 (39:55):
And that you're yeah, no, no, no, I completely agree.
I love how you you know, put that into a
like a formula, a framework, because for me, I don't
necessarily like always equate things, but I know that what
I'm doing is intentional. So for me, the shift has
been like what do I need to say to attract clients?
(40:15):
What do I need to do to like get more engagement?
And the shift that's worked better and that always works
better and that always gets the results that I want
is what do my clients need to hear from me today?
So it takes the focus, like you were saying, off
of me and like the results that I want to
(40:38):
create and what I'm here to do and what I
have to say, and puts the focus back onto like
how do I just show up and like serve today.
And that's been something that I consistently teach my clients
because it's so easy to get stuck in like analysis
paralysis or like what do they need to hear? Like
(41:00):
oh I keep getting this like I don't have the
money yet, how do I shift whatever? Whatever? Anyway, Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Speaker 3 (41:13):
Those are That's exactly what my client's say to me too.
It's like, Okay, but am I speaking to the right person?
And is this what they need to hear? And I'm like,
just sit down and write what do they need to
hear it? What do you want to say today to them?
If you had this person sitting in front of you
right now, what would you tell them? What would you
want to share with them? Yeah, And it makes the
writing process so much easier because it comes from that
(41:35):
human approach. Yeah, if I sat down and had a
conversation with you, I'm not going to think about like,
oh am I saying the right things?
Speaker 1 (41:43):
Is she receiving this.
Speaker 2 (41:44):
The right way? It's a conversation.
Speaker 1 (41:46):
M hm hm, that's it totally. Yeah, And yeah, just
like feeling hurt. So this is something I talk a
lot about when I teach on sales because I feel
like people people teach sales, they're like, oh, say this.
I had a client come to me and she was like, yeah,
this past coach that I hired told me to say.
Oh I just got goose bumps, Like that was literally
(42:09):
in the script, And I'm like, what the fuck? Like
can we not just teach people how to connect with
themselves and what they're feeling and express that? Like why
why does it have to be such a formula and
such a like it's so inauthentic to me that it
drives me crazy. I'm like, how are people out there
teaching these things?
Speaker 3 (42:31):
That's a phrase I would never use, right, like what's.
Speaker 2 (42:35):
Wrong with what?
Speaker 1 (42:37):
Yeah?
Speaker 2 (42:38):
But I funny, I've actually heard that. Really he said it.
Speaker 3 (42:42):
I can pinpoint and I at least one person that
I've heard say that to me.
Speaker 1 (42:47):
No way, Well there's somebody out there teaching people to
say that in their sales scripts, so watch out.
Speaker 3 (42:59):
Oh this is like, this is what's so hard about
the industry sometimes because it feels like there's so much faith.
Speaker 1 (43:06):
Trickery looking dumb. Yeah, but then okay, what is real?
Like y yeah, and then you and I are over
here trying to get like, you know, real results and
have real human connection and it's just sometimes it feels
like an upward battle on my end anyway. Yeah, no,
it does.
Speaker 2 (43:26):
I feel that, But then I always come back to you.
Speaker 3 (43:29):
Okay, but trust that you're going to find the right
person and you're not going to get Like I haven't
had a client issue since May twenty twenty one.
Speaker 1 (43:42):
Oh my god, me too, Right, it was like June. No,
it was June twenty twenty for me, and I knew
that it was going to be an issue, but I
didn't listen to myself exactly.
Speaker 2 (43:52):
Yeah, yeah, it was.
Speaker 3 (43:54):
It was definitely one of those fixed mindsets that you
can't change that. Yeah, it's I think really focusing and
like I said, like even going back to those people
who dropping in the DMS and or maybe thinking of
working with me, I'm like, yeah, no, not until you
change your bios, Like I'm not going to work with
people who aren't going to be in integrity with Yeah,
(44:19):
if you're you're not going to be ethical here, Like
I don't care if you stretch a story. And one
of the things that I teach my clients, especially clients
like I work with a lot of private clients who
you wouldn't know that I'm their coach. You wouldn't, So
(44:39):
I can't exactly tell their story in full because it
would be.
Speaker 2 (44:46):
Very clear who.
Speaker 3 (44:47):
I'm working with. So I do have to sometimes stretch
the story a little bit and change details a little bit.
And I think that that is different than putting like
this is a transformation, or this is a revenue result
and it's untrue or it's lacking clarity, like I had
(45:09):
a sixty one K week is different than I've had
sixty one thousand dollars in sales this week or sixty
one thousand dollars in cash this week, Like there are
differences in that.
Speaker 1 (45:23):
Yeah, yeah, exactly.
Speaker 2 (45:25):
I don't even know where that number came from, but.
Speaker 1 (45:28):
Whatever, maybe someone needed to hear that number today, I guess, so, yeah, no,
I have one hundred percent agree. And that to me,
as a beginner entrepreneur, wasn't clear, like when I was
seeing all those numbers, and then I found out that, like, oh,
there's a difference between cash received and like sales, right,
because when someone makes sales, they're usually their client is
(45:51):
on like a payment plan or it's like promised income
that sometimes doesn't always come through, especially if you have
problematic clients or you're like taking on clients that aren't
a good fit. And yeah, then I realized, like, oh,
so you know, technically, you know, someone could have like
a sixty one K week and that could be it
(46:11):
for the year, right, technically, you know, right like.
Speaker 3 (46:15):
That, you know, let's round it to sixty thousand. Right,
you're if you just did a sixty thousand dollars contract,
but you're serving them for a year, that's five thousand
a month. That's not quite as grand and as big
as I got sixty thousand today. You know for sure,
even if you got it all in cash today, it's
(46:36):
still stretches out over that year. Yeah, am, And it
limits you to who you can serve because now one
spot is gone for a year. It's all about context,
and I think, you know, speaking to trends, I think
people are seeing it now. I think honestly, like we
were talking about this before we started recording, but even
the introduction of threads, I feel like has like lifted
(46:58):
the veil a little bit on the industry. And I
think people are being really honest about things that they've
seen and they've heard, and I'm sure that it sometimes
feels a little negative or caddy, but it's also like
refreshing to see so much honesty about things we all
knew were going.
Speaker 1 (47:17):
On, Yeah, but no one was saying it.
Speaker 3 (47:20):
No one wanted to say it because then you'd be
that person.
Speaker 1 (47:23):
Right, And that's like, let's talk about that for a sec.
Because I feel like, you know, we both kind of
related on how Instagram started to feel like this hot
girl marketing kind of like our hot girl summer kind
of vibe, right, and it was like we're the cool people,
you're not. And I've never been part of like the
(47:43):
popular group, so I was definitely not like there. Yeah,
but I think it's it's hard, Like I definitely tried
to like still, you know, show up in a way
that was like attractive, and you know, people are out
there teaching these absurd things. Like I saw somebody be like,
oh my god. I saw this person respond to a
(48:06):
Facebook comment and the Facebook request for help was like
help me to attract clients, And I click on this
this woman posted and this like I really don't want
to bash people or talk shit, but like, man.
Speaker 2 (48:23):
Have go just in tragerty.
Speaker 1 (48:29):
It's the integrity piece, right, So her like six step
process to attract more clients was the first one was
post or get your show stopping your scroll stopping selfie.
And I'm like, that has nothing to do with attracting clients.
Speaker 3 (48:53):
A selfie, but it does because it speaks to that
vanity that we have sometimes right right, yeah not but
it doesn't mean you're intracting the right people, no.
Speaker 4 (49:05):
So, but it just feels like like it's it's part
of it, Like obviously we have to have something to post,
but it just feels so surface level to me.
Speaker 1 (49:17):
And I'm like, what's really actually gonna attract clients? Because like,
i can post a selfie, but if I'm not like
speaking from the heart, if I'm not actually sharing my
values or like my beliefs or my thought processes or
speaking to the people who like want to work with me,
then a selfie is not going to do anything.
Speaker 3 (49:42):
And yeah it does, I'm actually so I'm like, as
you can probably tell, I'm a researcher, I'm an observer.
So I like observe somebody for a really long time
and I look through their whole process.
Speaker 2 (49:54):
How are they.
Speaker 3 (49:54):
Getting clients, what are they taking people through, what are
their techniques and tricks? Right, And I don't know why
I do it, it just do it, and it helps because
then I get to say, Okay, I've seen this, this
I think would work for you because of X y Z,
why don't we explore that. But that being said, I
have noticed a trend with a particular crowd that they
(50:17):
focus more on saying nothing showing up beautifully, really like
poking people. So they talk about, oh mean, girl marketing
is out, but then do like a very shadowed version
of toxic neangiral marketing anyway, and they're getting clients, but
then they're also the ones again complaining that they have
(50:39):
clients defaulting on payments and that clients are like not
respecting them or not respecting their processes, or you should
be in all my programs, you know, not just waiting
for me to open up something just for you. That
that sort of thing. And I find that really interesting
because I'm like, yeah, sure, you're attracting clients with this
sort of marketing, but you're not a tracking the right clients, right.
(51:02):
Those of us that are actually sitting here are saying like,
this is what I know, this is my message, this
is the information I want to give you, and being
very transparent.
Speaker 2 (51:12):
We may not be getting.
Speaker 3 (51:13):
The volume of clients, but sure, shit, we're getting the
clients that are meant to be in our containers. And
it's like I think for most people I talk to
you about this, we're also getting the clients who are
sticking with us. We're not just having to go out
and look for new clients all the time because we
have clients re signing, you know, contract after contract after contract,
(51:35):
because we still have the ability to serve them.
Speaker 1 (51:37):
Yeah. Yeah, you're so right, because I have seen that,
and I've always wondered, like how My immediate assumption is
that it's just all made up that they're not getting clients,
you know, because I'm like, how the fuck does somebody
get clients by just doing that. I've like tried, you know,
just like putting oh fun selfies and stuff, and it's
(52:00):
like it doesn't work. Like that was a tactic I tried,
you know, during my whole like hibernation phase a year
and a half two years ago. And yeah, it just
so it's interesting. What comes to mind is human design.
Do you remember what your profile is? Yeah, I'm a
six to two interesting. Interesting, Yeah, So I just wonder,
(52:24):
like I notice a lot of fives, Like people with
a five in their profile can pull that strategy off. Yeah, charismatic, Yes,
oh here's my selfie and here's what I'm up to,
and and fives have this sort of like allure to them.
My god. And what's so interesting too that I just
remembered is there's something in one of the books that
(52:48):
I read on human design. It says something around like
be careful not to over sell or like you know,
when you lift the veil, is like what behind it?
Actually true because they can tend to This isn't a
bad thing, it's just something to be aware of, but
they can tend to kind of you know, build this
whole illusion that's like, you know, behind the illusion. I mean,
(53:10):
it's obviously an illusion. So yeah, it's interesting how energetic
and personality I mean it I guess so the lines
are more your personality. So it's just fascinating how all
of that kind of comes into play because I so
you like to observe like what works. I like to
connect it back to human design and be like, okay,
what's working for like each different design profile, like all
(53:34):
of those things.
Speaker 3 (53:35):
So as soon as you said fives, I was like, yeah, yeah, yeah,
it's so Yeah. I just like, now I'm thinking about
all the things I've been told that people have taught
coming from that same group, like intrusive eye contact in
your view heard of this, no, or you make this
(53:58):
really intense, like very intrusive, like like I'm staring right through.
Speaker 2 (54:04):
You type of eye contact as a method for sales.
Speaker 1 (54:08):
Ew that makes me. That gives me goosebumps, But they do.
Speaker 3 (54:14):
And yeah, it's these things and I'm like, you know
what I would rather do my thoughts, like I always
look up.
Speaker 2 (54:20):
I'd rather do that.
Speaker 3 (54:22):
Yeah, you can listen to my words and if it resonates,
great And if you think I'm boring, fine, move.
Speaker 1 (54:27):
On right right right. Yeah, I'm always like looking somewhere else.
I'm like, should I be looking like at the camera,
and I'm like off in my world, trying to pull
the information in. But yeah, it's what works. And I
think the moral of all of this is like understanding
for me human design has been so helpful because it's like, Okay,
these things work for these people, these things work for
(54:48):
these people, and this is what works for me. And
I think the more that we can lean into that,
like what works for us and and what we feel
called to do. I think the better off we are
in general, like not just with business results, but in
life too, everything like fuck what other people say, fuck
(55:08):
what other people do, Like, just keep focusing on what
you are here to do.
Speaker 2 (55:15):
Yep, yeah, yep, yep, yep. I was like, yep, yeah
it is.
Speaker 3 (55:23):
And I had a thought actually as you were saying this,
and I, oh, shoot, no, it's gone.
Speaker 1 (55:28):
Well. I feel like that's a very beautiful note to
leave off. Do you want to add any final thoughts?
Speaker 3 (55:36):
No, I think like that that is the perfect way.
It's just like you do you and to note the
noise that is not meant for you and really be
discerning on who you work with, like get to know them,
and if they don't want to get to know you,
then they're probably not meant to be in your world.
Speaker 1 (55:59):
Yeah, definitely. You know, when you're looking at other people's
content and if their voice is making your head spin,
I feel like that's not the right content for us
to be digesting. We all go through like I feel
like people really underestimate or feel like they're on a
different path, you know, like people in the beginning, they're like, oh, well,
(56:23):
I'm new here, and it's like we all go through
the same shit. Honestly, Like, it doesn't matter if you're new,
if you've been here five, ten, fifteen years. I think
part of being in this business is just what it is.
It's like we get lost in the in the crap
and the stuff, and it's hard sometimes to tune out
(56:44):
that noise, you know, and to not get sucked into
all of that stuff. And sometimes we're not even aware
that it's happening, like with the introduction of threads, right Like,
I didn't realize how inauthentic it felt to be on
Instagram until I was on Threads and I was like, Wow,
this feels so good.
Speaker 3 (57:03):
I have evidence for this, so we can leave this
kind of is that last thought if you want, But
here's my evidence. I work with people from starting their
business to eight figures. That's my range of clientele right now.
Those are the revenues that my clients are making. I
(57:24):
am doing the exact same work with the with them,
whether they're at zero dollars or eight figures. It is
exactly the same work. They go through, exactly the same problems.
We are still looking at their businesses in almost exactly
the same way. And I would say, in fact, it's
(57:45):
even harder once you're at these higher levels because you've
kind of got to burn away pieces that they've built
that probably weren't meant for them. So yeah, if you
are comparing yourself to anybody, just knowing that they are
going through the exact same things as you, it doesn't change.
You will continue to go through these same issues year
(58:07):
after year, revenue point after revenue point. So manage them,
focus on them, focus on you. Do what you want
to do, and that is what's going to create your success.
Speaker 1 (58:20):
Right. I love that so much. If there's anything I've
learned over the last couple of years, it's been the patterns,
Like the same patterns show up, it's just a different way.
So if you can learn how to navigate those you know,
patterns or those I'm calling them patterns but like challenges
difficulties like, then you know, the easier it'll be to
(58:41):
continue to show up. Thank you. This was awesome. It's
been so good to chat with you. Thank you so
much for tuning into the podcast today. If you like
what you heard, I would love it if you left
a review. If you like my vibe, come and hang
with me in my Facebook or Telegram group. I'll drop
the link to my email list below, or you can
get instant access. Make sure you check the show notes
(59:04):
for any other links that I mentioned today, and until
next time, I'm sending you waves of abundance.
Welcome to the Aligned and Magnetic Podcast. I'm your host,
Laura Ashley, intuitive business coach certified by the International Coaching Federation,
and they call me the Money, Mindset and Manifestation Queen.
I take a spiritual and practical approach that's backed by
neuroscience to help you make your vision a reality, but
(00:25):
more importantly, doing it in a way that lights you
the fuck up. If you're ready to create an aligned,
magnetic and profitable business so you can live a life
and do the work you are absolutely in love with,
You're in the right place. Get ready to hear the
powerful questions and raw lessons that you need to create
success your way. Thank you so much for being here.
(00:48):
Let's dive in Hi Loves. We are back for another
episode of the Aligned to Magnetic podcast. Today we have
Robin who is joining us. We're just going to have
a conversation about you know, business, and I don't know,
I feel like we align on so many different conversations
and topics. So we're just gonna have a conversation and
(01:10):
I'm yeah, I think it's gonna be really good. So
just for context, I mean, I feel like I've kind
of aligned with you. Robin, because we're both manifesting generators, right,
and so I can see like a lot of similarities
in our marketing and how we show up. It's more of,
I think, an underlying thing that's, you know, we're multi
(01:32):
passionate and it's hard to put ourselves in a box.
And I feel like that's like the theme that I
that I see.
Speaker 2 (01:40):
Mm hmmm, it's like the thing I struggle with the moust.
Speaker 1 (01:45):
Yeah, yeah, And it's just it's I don't know how
you feel about this, but I feel like, you know,
I've been able to surpass that whole box before, and
like I always find my way back to like it
doesn't matter. We don't have to in a box, Like
we can just do it however we want. And then
no matter how many times I've like gone through that,
(02:06):
I don't know if you feel the same way, but
there's inevitably always a moment where it's like time to
shift or pivot, and it's like I have to put
myself back in this box or like really define who
I am and how I'm I guess marketing myself or
promoting myself or sharing my offer.
Speaker 3 (02:25):
I think that that's the key, though, is if we
didn't have to market ourselves, we wouldn't care as much,
right Like, when we're working with clients, it doesn't matter
because that multi passionate nature really helps us to see
things from different perspectives and be able to ask the
right questions to our clients. But yeah, it's all about
(02:46):
marketing and I'm going through it right now, or even yesterday,
I was like, am I talking about too many things?
Am I not focused enough?
Speaker 2 (02:56):
Is this what the problem is? I?
Speaker 1 (02:58):
Yes, I was just talking to one of my peers
and clients and colleagues, Ashley, because we just did this
masterclass on burnout, and I was looking at my feed
and I'm like, coaching business burnout, and I'm like, and
my brain started to feel overwhelmed. And I was like, man,
(03:20):
if I'm feeling overwhelmed, you know, how's my audience feeling
about that? You know? Like, how is that translating in
my social media presence? So yeah, I think I think
we all go through it.
Speaker 3 (03:34):
It's actually funny that you say that, because I was
actually thinking back to a launch I did early or
late spring.
Speaker 2 (03:40):
I guess where.
Speaker 3 (03:41):
I carefully thought out the sequence of what I was
going to talk about, and I would say it was
probably harder with the same result as I would have
got if I had just done it off the cuff, right.
So it's really interesting that even even with all of
the like different topics that we put out there, that
(04:05):
somehow our audience still gets us, Like different things are
going to resonate with different people, and for whatever reason
they see, they.
Speaker 2 (04:15):
Still they still listen, they still come right.
Speaker 3 (04:18):
Like, yeah, my engagement, my open rates are still better.
I was actually looking at mine compared to somebody with
five thousand more followers, and I'm getting better engagement that
I can visually see than somebody with seven thousand, eight
thousand followers, And that's like, that's kind of incredible to
(04:38):
me because so I must be saying something right. And
I feel the same about yours. Like watching your content.
Speaker 2 (04:42):
I'm like, yeah, no, I get it. It all makes
sense to me.
Speaker 1 (04:46):
Yeah, It's almost like I feel like it's the voice
of like the strategic business coaches out there that kind
of comes into my brain that's like, oh, you're not
getting these results that you want, and like that's even
subjective because I'm like, well, what are the results that
(05:08):
I want? And like, you know what I mean. And
then I'm like, am I even working toward those results
right now? Like what's the purpose? And so it's interesting
when we just like step back a moment and really
look at what we're doing and feel into all of
the things that we have to offer, and just like
(05:28):
ask ourselves, where's that voice coming from? For me? Anyway?
I don't know. You can speak to your experience, but
it's like, yeah, who's telling us that we have to
stick to one topic or that we have to niche down?
Like Niching has never really resonated for me. I tried it. It
didn't work.
Speaker 3 (05:49):
Yeah, Yeah, yeah, I had to. I had to niche
my ideal client, I think more than anything. And I
think that helped, Yeah, because then I could be broad
in how I serve them. But I understand I need
exactly who I serve. But yeah, Niching into something. Yeah,
(06:10):
Oh my gosh, the amount of titles I've had over
the last four years.
Speaker 1 (06:14):
Yeah, let's talk about that. I've had a number of
titles too over the last four or five years.
Speaker 2 (06:22):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (06:22):
What's it like to go through that transition like all
the time?
Speaker 3 (06:30):
Okay, So I think there's always that part of you
that's like again, I'm.
Speaker 2 (06:35):
Switching it again.
Speaker 3 (06:39):
And I even made a promise once to my coaching
supervisor that I would stick with a title for longer
than three months, and I did not for that one anyways.
Speaker 2 (06:48):
But I soon after found.
Speaker 3 (06:52):
Identity coaching really was what I think fully enveloped what
I was doing with my clients. Like I am a
business person, I have an ample amount of business executive
leadership coaching experience outside of the online industry, and I
(07:13):
get clients all the time that come to me for business,
but what they walk away with is not just business,
and more often than not, it is this focus on them,
the person that's in front of me, and we go
on this voyage of self discovery and really reclaiming that
identity that I think that we put on to ourselves.
(07:34):
And I think, you know, tying this back to these
many shifts and the many changes that I've had in
my titles, I kept focusing my purpose on what I
was doing and not who I was. And as soon
as I realize that that, I just need to shine
the light on who I am, which is so hard
(07:55):
when you're this person that's always like trying to be
that in the background and push others forward. To turn
that spotlight on yourself is incredibly uncomfortable. But once I
realized that and I could shift that message even for
my clients, everything kind of came together. And actually calling
myself an identity coach I has been the longest title
(08:18):
I've ever had. It's been over a year now that
I've had that, so crazy. Yeah, it's just kind of
interesting anything for anybody that struggles with us. And if
you're going through this pivoting from one title to the
next title to the next title, kind of pull back
and take a look at am I focusing too much
on my purpose being what I do versus.
Speaker 2 (08:38):
Who I am.
Speaker 1 (08:40):
I love that one of my clients is going through
that right now and she's you know, in the earlier
stages of business, and I'm like, honestly, this is normal
what you're going through. Like I pivoted so many times
from the moment I began, like even health coaching, right
and my business has transformed so much since then, and
(09:00):
it's natural. I think we grow so much in the beginning.
And I love what you said there about you know,
not identifying so deeply with the title, but more so
the purpose, because that's exactly what it is. I mean,
we're going to send ourselves for loops if we continue
to try to like define you know, who we are
(09:22):
based on like what we call ourselves. So yeah, just
really focusing on putting your best self out there and
like your message, and that doesn't really doesn't really matter
what title you give yourself. You know. It's funny. I
just finished business coaching with this one coach and I
remember this one coaching call that we had together, and
(09:44):
there was so much focus. I didn't realize this till after.
There was so much focus and like hyper fixation around
what I'm calling myself, and I'm like, when I got
off the call, I was like, wait, but like that
doesn't matter to me. I would like, I don't care
what I call myself, Like people are going to come
(10:04):
to me for the message and the content I'm putting
out there.
Speaker 2 (10:08):
Yeah, one hundred percent.
Speaker 3 (10:09):
Like I wish that was the message that we were
hearing more. Yeah, because I think that that happens so often,
where people get so hyper fixated on what to call
yourself and what your Instagram bio should.
Speaker 2 (10:22):
Look like, like gives a fuck?
Speaker 1 (10:25):
Yeah?
Speaker 2 (10:26):
Can I swear on this podcast?
Speaker 1 (10:27):
Yes?
Speaker 3 (10:27):
Yes, yes, because I will Yeah, yeah, yeah, it just
it is one of those things like if somebody is
hiring you based on what they're seeing in your Instagram,
like they're probably not the best client for you because
they haven't really listened to your message and understood who
you are as a person and if you're a good
fit for them. Like these messages that you see of
(10:49):
mentors saying, oh, somebody dropped into my DM on a
Thursday and they're paying me in full for a twenty
thousand dollars one to one on on Friday, is like
so unreal to me. And I take a look at
that and I think automatically, like is that even going
to be the right client for you? Or is this
gonna be one of those situations where they don't they
(11:12):
jump too quickly, didn't understand what they were getting into,
didn't really fully vet you as the best person for
them in this moment, and become a problematic client. And right,
you're the mentor too that's always complaining about problematic clients
and people defaulting on payments like that's why.
Speaker 1 (11:30):
Yeah, And it's so interesting, like I always think too,
because I mean I've had results coming quickly and clients
show up out of nowhere. But like you said, my
process isn't like fill in an application, decide the next
day that you're in, and like pay the day after that.
And I've actually, yeah, when I see that happening, I'm
(11:53):
like part of me is like how can I get there?
But at the same time, I'm like, that's like the
lazy set to me, you know, the lazy side that
like just wants to like be in bed and like
make money from bed and like not do anything. But
the heart center, like the real version of me, when
I'm like my best self and I want to show
(12:15):
up an impact knows that like I got to do
my part in connecting with my future clients and like
actually seeing if we're a good fit. Because for me personally,
I can't tell if someone's a good fit just from
an application. Like yeah, I can get a good sense
and I can probably be like, yeah, this person would
(12:35):
be great, But when I get on the call with them,
and I know other people like teach you to sell
in the DMS or whatever, but I need to have
an actual conversation to be able to feel somebody out
and like really connect with them.
Speaker 3 (12:51):
Yeah, I agree with you. I even looking at my
client roster. Even the membership that I have is all
people that I've had conversations with. I think I've had
one person join who I've had I guess some conversations
in the DMS, and I didn't know her well, and
she joined, and then she's turning into a one to one,
(13:11):
which is great. But for the most part, I just
I'm always working with people I've talked to, and I
think it's fine, Like, would it be nice to have,
you know, hundreds of people jumping into it? Sure, right,
that would be, like you said, the easy thing. It
would feel good. But then I would feel really awkward
about serving those people. I think because for me especially,
(13:36):
I get so invested in my clients. It doesn't matter
if you're paying me seventy dollars a month or seven
hundred or whatever. I'm invested in your business pretty much
the same way. I may not give you as much
time for seventy dollars, but I'm still invested in what
you're doing. I still understand your business, I know your
(13:57):
business structure, I know your services. I can't do that
for people that I don't feel a connection with, I will.
I think I energetically repel those people anyway.
Speaker 1 (14:07):
Yeah, yeah, no, I one hundred percent agree with you
on that. And it's so interesting because you know, I
feel like everything that I learned in my first two
years of business, I feel like I'm just like I've
been undoing it all because there was so much conversation
around like boundaries and like, well, if someone's paying you
seventy dollars, then this is the structure that they fit in.
(14:29):
And I'm like, like, I hear that and it's valid.
And also as someone who's really here to serve and
support people, like that's just not you know what I mean,
it's just that Yeah.
Speaker 3 (14:46):
Like to that point, my intake form for the membership
is massive, and it makes them tell me every single
piece of their business. So they're walking into this membership
and I can see exactly how they're being siness operates
like you're not going to get that in other memberships,
Like that doesn't happen definitely not. That helps me to
(15:07):
be quicker at coaching them at mentoring, right, right, So
like why are we putting these boundaries?
Speaker 2 (15:12):
I would love to talk boundaries.
Speaker 1 (15:14):
Yeah, let's talk about boundaries.
Speaker 2 (15:17):
Boundaries.
Speaker 3 (15:18):
They I honestly like there are times for people who
are people pleasing and who are working outside of their contract.
And I think that this happens quite often for done
for youth services. Sure you need some boundaries when it
(15:39):
comes to coaching, I think that.
Speaker 2 (15:42):
Boundaries have become.
Speaker 3 (15:46):
Just like out of control, where people are boundarying themselves
into this little box and putting themselves up on a
pedestal so that their clients can't have access to them,
and then shaming them for one wanting access, for wanting more,
like those silly messages about my clients are so self
(16:06):
led they barely even use Boxer, they barely even use
the container.
Speaker 2 (16:12):
What why are they paying you? Then?
Speaker 3 (16:14):
Like, what are you there for? Aren't we as coaches
there to serve people, there to guide people, there to
be their sounding board? And it was really interesting because
I worked with a coach who had like a three
minute I didn't realize that's when I heard her, so
now I know better. But she had a three minute
limit on Boxer messages.
Speaker 1 (16:33):
I had someone like that too, and I was like,
what the fuck? My boxer messages are like ten minutes long.
Speaker 3 (16:39):
Right, I need to think this out so then I
would never message her and she'd be like why aren't
you messaging me? And I'm like, because I can't succinctly
message you in under three minutes on what I'm trying
to think of, Like I'm trying to process it enough myself.
But then like, what's the point why do I have
you if I'm self coaching?
Speaker 1 (16:58):
I wonder how many of these coaches with all of
these boundaries actually truly understand like ICF coaching.
Speaker 2 (17:07):
Oh, probably not, because I mean.
Speaker 1 (17:10):
We both know. I think we're both out loud like
verbal processors and yeah, I mean I feel like we've
both seen in the Coach Approach Academy and you've taken
other coaching programs as well, but we see the process
of coaching and it's like, you know, what we start
with over here is not always what we end with,
and it takes a lot of processing and like sometimes
(17:36):
just trying things on, you know, like sometimes I'll say
something and I'm like, oh, wait, that's not it. It's this,
but it has to come out to be able to
get to the thing that it.
Speaker 3 (17:45):
Is yep, one hundred percent. Yeah, And it's it's really
interesting for me. I didn't there was a time where
I was like, I'm not even going to offer boxer
coaching because I felt like it was a crutch.
Speaker 2 (17:58):
Yeah, and then I.
Speaker 3 (17:59):
Re examined how I was utilizing it, and I was
utilizing it more to answer questions, which as soon as
I shifted and utilizes it, utilize it more for coaching
and asking coaching questions and allowing them to go and
process and come back, all of a sudden it became easier.
And I start every coaching conversation now or coaching relationship
(18:24):
with having all of my clients get in there and
do a brain dum and for like, I love that. Yeah,
ninety percent of them have never ever done that before.
They've never had a coach allow them to do that.
Speaker 2 (18:35):
They have been boundaried into.
Speaker 3 (18:37):
This, like you have to only do two minutes, ten minutes,
five minutes, and I'm like, no.
Speaker 2 (18:43):
I want.
Speaker 3 (18:43):
I was like, if it takes you thirty minutes to
do this, do it. And I set aside that time
to listen and respond because it actually shows me how
their brain works, how their decision making works, how the
processing were, how well they're able to self coach themselves. Because,
as we know, the more you talk it out sometimes
(19:06):
the more you realize your own solution and it makes
the rest of the relationship easier. So on average, I'm
still only spending maybe an hour, hour and a half
a day supporting.
Speaker 2 (19:20):
My clients in Boxer.
Speaker 3 (19:21):
That's awesome, and that's with ten clients using it, right,
But if I put boundaries on it, I guarantee I'd
be spending a whole lot more time. Totally, totally, a
whole lot more back and forth. Like you said you're
gonna go Nope, that's not it, and then you've got
to think of your next two to three minute message,
and it's back and forth all day.
Speaker 1 (19:42):
Yeah, totally. Yeah, I can mirror that. I've never used
it as a brain dump, although I think my clients
do brain dump definitely to me, just not before a
call like that. But that's like, that's genius. I have
them kill out like a prep form so they like
get to reflect it ever everything. But I yeah, I
(20:02):
might try that.
Speaker 2 (20:03):
Yeah, I try it.
Speaker 3 (20:04):
I I used the form too, and I found like
they just couldn't process verbalize right.
Speaker 1 (20:10):
Yeah, yeah, that makes so much sense. But yeah, I
also noticed, like, so I stopped kind of. I didn't
ever stop using Boxer, although I thought about not using
Boxer and but what I noticed that when I was like,
I also had to shift my my process with it,
(20:31):
because my clients were coming to me like should I
do this or should I do this? Is this a
good idea? And that's when I had to start using
like the coaching questions because I was like, this is
not the purpose of any of this relationship. And it's
incredible how we can just shift the intention. Right. By
shifting the intention, it changes everything, right, Yeah.
Speaker 3 (20:53):
And I think that that also, I think for both
of us brings us back to our coaching roots and
really feeling like we are utilizing a proper coaching technique.
Speaker 1 (21:06):
While still teaching on business. Like this was the big
thing for me, Like, I know, you've kind of been
observing my whole transformation over the last two years. And
it's so funny because I released my new Paradigm CEO
Mastermind back in twenty twenty one, which was like definitely business.
(21:27):
But I was so gung ho about not offering or
teaching structure because structure had put me in so much
of a box that I was like, no, fuck structure,
We're not doing structure, Like we're going to be completely structureless.
And I would still teach frameworks, I guess, or like
(21:47):
here's generally how this works. But yeah, it's just so fascinating.
And then to come you know after two years later,
well it was probably like a year and a half actually,
like being brave enough to step into I'm still kind
of toying with what I call myself, but aligned business
coaching is what it is right now. But I had
(22:11):
so much resistance to calling myself a business coach because
of what the industry is, you know, But I just
like the more I work with my clients and hear
how empowered they feel, I just it makes me feel
so good that like I have surpassed that block that
(22:33):
was there for me and really figured out how to
like still teach business tools and strategies and make it
like customize to each client. And so what I realized
lately because I always like do the thing and then
I'm like, oh, this is what I'm doing, And so
(22:55):
I'm in that phase right now where I realize, like, wow,
I've created a massively experiential learning opportunity for clients. Like
instead of just coming and watching a masterclass for two
hours and taking notes and asking questions, it's like no
let's get into your content, let me provide you with feedback,
(23:19):
let me ask you a question and help you to
really think about how you're showing up and like presenting
yourself to people. And yeah, so that's where I'm at
with that. I don't know where that came from, but.
Speaker 3 (23:33):
Well, I know, I think what you're saying and what
I love about it is there can be a different
way to do business coaching, and I think that there is,
and I think we've kind of warped what business coaching
is and people believe that business coaching is all about money,
all about marketing, all about sales, and there's so much
(23:54):
more to that. And this is where people get into
those spirals and feeling a not good enough because they're
not hitting whatever magical number it is.
Speaker 2 (24:03):
This month and doing it in record time.
Speaker 3 (24:08):
But it's because, yeah, we've warped what business coaching is,
whereas like business coaching really should be focused on the
business in front of you. Yeah, giving them, like you said,
give them the tools, give them the theory, right, give
them the mindset tools that they need, because that's a
huge part of it too, the foundational structures, and then
(24:31):
they get to apply what works for them, and I
wish we did more of that because then we'd have
less people struggling in the first two three years of business.
Speaker 1 (24:40):
Well, and this is something I realized too, because I
was talking to one of my friends about it, Like
sometimes I'm really hard on myself because I'm like, man,
like I haven't done nearly what like this person's done,
you know, And I was in learning about business. I
started learning about business and building my business before other
people in my coaching cohort or group at the time did,
(25:06):
so I was technically ahead, but when it came to
my results, I felt so behind and at the same
time like I can see that and be like, well,
you know, my message would not be anywhere near what
it is today if I hadn't struggled. So I think
there's like a divine purpose for all of it. And
(25:28):
you know, their message gets to be like, oh, look
at all these fancy, flashy results like this is this
and this is this, and I'm a boss and I'm
killing it. And then, you know, when I really think
about it, like sure, sometimes it sucks that like I
haven't reached like I don't know, like a million dollars
in a year or something. Like that, but crazy numbers.
(25:52):
But yeah, it's just like when I really connect with
what it is that i'm doing, like I'm really hap
be with it, you know, when I'm really focused on
the work that I'm doing and not really looking at
those external results, which I feel like a lot of
us get sucked into. When I think about, like, Okay,
my bills are paid, like I've got what I need.
(26:15):
I'm really happy, like and the work that I'm doing
is really incredible. Can I just be okay with that?
You know?
Speaker 2 (26:23):
Yeah, yes, yes I can. I actually did the numbers once.
Speaker 3 (26:29):
I was running the numbers on what it would look
like for my business at two hundred and fifty thousand
versus five hundred thousand a year, and what I would
need team wise, what I would need, systems wise, et cetera,
et cetera, And when it came to my actual take
home pay, doubling my business revenue, I think I would
(26:53):
get in an extra five or ten thousand a year. Yeah,
but I would have to work more, I'd have to
manage more people. I would be a respont reponsible from our clients.
And I was like, you know what, Nope.
Speaker 2 (27:03):
I'm good.
Speaker 3 (27:04):
I think I know where my sweet spot is, right,
you look at those like I know, for me, there's
people that I've compared myself to in the past that
are making millions every year.
Speaker 2 (27:16):
And I look at that and I think, I actually
don't want that now.
Speaker 3 (27:20):
Yeah, But it's a hard because sometimes you're looking at
this and be like, how how.
Speaker 2 (27:24):
Are you getting?
Speaker 3 (27:26):
But that being said too, I think for certain people
that I've compared myself to, I wonder in three to
five years time if they will still be as profitable as.
Speaker 2 (27:37):
They are right now?
Speaker 3 (27:38):
Right, Yeah, Like, are we playing the long game by
building a foundation, figuring out who we are, figuring out
what we really want to focus on, what actual revenue
numbers want to be, and we're happier in the long run?
Speaker 2 (27:53):
Are we going to burn out? Right?
Speaker 1 (27:55):
And that's actually a common theme that I see in
those people who are doing those bigs like things in
their business, those big numbers and all of that, is
that they do end up burning out, and they do
end up like you know, hitting some sort of rock
bottom and then feeling lost and turned around and having
to go through some sort of like transformation, which I
(28:15):
don't think either is bad, it's just different you know.
So it's like I've never been willing. I'm I'll work
like I work a lot, and I think I kind
of was maybe like born to work a lot. But
I also am not willing to sacrifice myself, Like when
I'm feeling low, I'm not willing to push myself to
(28:37):
work just because I feel like I have to work,
you know. And I feel like that's really different from
other people, because you know, people will still I mean,
I still show up. I'm not like going to ghost
my business, but other people really like, yeah, just I
don't know, run themselves into the ground.
Speaker 3 (28:56):
So I agree, Yeah, and I think we don't need to.
We don't need to be doing that. I would rather
be taking it slower, being more consistent that This last
year for me was a year of slowing down. Yeah,
that's what I wanted to do. I stepped back from
having my own mentor coach other than a coaching supervisor
that I continually work with, and I really was just
(29:21):
focusing on Okay, like I've had all the ups and downs.
You get the ten K, once you get the twenty
k months, and then it's like three K and then
five K, like it. I didn't want that anymore. I
didn't want the uncertainty. So how do I create consistency?
And this is the first year that I can say
I consistently had the same revenue every single month, like
(29:41):
I didn't drop below a specific number. And that felt
so much better to me. It relieved I'd like so
much stress because, like you said, bills can be paid.
I can put money aside. I'm not sacrificing my life.
I'm not sacrificing my time. I'm not sacrificing time with
my daughter, my husband, And I'm happy serving. I'm like
(30:04):
way happier serving my clients than I was when you're
serving and struggling to make something happen that really you
didn't even need to be pushing for. So I think
in the long run, that's the lesson. I'm happy that
I learned, and I think it's going to serve me.
I can see myself being here ten twenty years from now,
(30:26):
still coaching and being incredibly happy with it and not
having to take on really any more clients than I
already have.
Speaker 1 (30:36):
I love that. Yeah, And I feel like, you know,
there's a couple of things that are coming up for me.
The one thing is numbers. People's numbers are not always
what they say they are, and I've had to kind
of My first coach told me this and I was like, oh,
that's weird because I'm such an honest person, like I
(30:57):
when I share numbers, I'm like, yeah, this actually happened
or is happening whatever. But there are other people who
kind of budge or like twist and don't tell the
whole story. And I've really been seeing more of that lately.
And you can even see like when people post testimonials,
(31:19):
they like wipe out the date that it was posted,
like you know, those screenshots or whatever. And I was like, huh,
that's interesting. That makes me trust them less, you know,
because I'm like, when was that posted? And even if
it was posted two or three years ago, who cares? Like,
but keep the date there so that people, yeah, be
transparent about your results. Right. So yeah, And I had
(31:43):
another client come to me and she was like, I know,
this girl that I worked with is fudging her numbers.
And then you know, there's I've heard of people like
buying a program but not having like lifetime access to it.
They had to keep paying a subscription fee to continue
accessing the material, and that seems like really unethical to
(32:05):
me unless it was you know, stated at the forefront.
But anyway, there's just like a lot of sometimes I
feel like the online space can be more of like
a hustle. And so the whole point of saying this
is like, for anyone listening, if you've ever felt not
enough or like your results aren't good enough, or you
(32:25):
have to like have these big you know, thirty K,
fifty K, one hundred K, two hundred k months or whatever.
Where was I going with that?
Speaker 3 (32:34):
Don't compare yourself because it's right, it's probably a lie.
Speaker 1 (32:38):
Yes, yeah, it could yeah, and maybe it could be
maybe not, but it could be, and we don't again,
we don't know the full story. So like, if they're
making two hundred k or five hundred k, let's say,
like how much of that are they actually taking home
and profiting off of?
Speaker 2 (32:52):
Yeah?
Speaker 3 (32:53):
So yeah, and I did that once. I went and
based on all the information that they had put forward,
took it and really like really pieced it apart to see, Okay, well,
how much you're making a million dollars, how much you're
actually going to put in your pocket?
Speaker 2 (33:09):
Yeah, and it was not much more than I do.
Yeah right, yeah really, And I've you know, same thing.
Speaker 3 (33:15):
I've had people who are calling themselves six figure business coaches,
seven figure business coaches, whatever, and they're getting in my
DMS and talking to me about coaching and saying that
like they haven't signed clients in six months and they're
struggling and stuff, And I'm like, but you're here and
you're telling.
Speaker 1 (33:28):
You can you call yourself that?
Speaker 2 (33:30):
Yeah?
Speaker 1 (33:31):
Yeah, and it's sad, Yeah yeah yeah.
Speaker 3 (33:35):
Just show And this goes back to like show who
you are. People want to work with you for who
you are, not necessarily the money that you've done. I
think money. And I actually wrote about this recently. It's
a double edged sword because yes, it's incredibly motivational. We
all need it, we all want it, we all need
it for safety and security of our person. But when
(33:58):
you are continually putting them message out, you're going to
also attract people who need it and need it desperately.
And yeah, that is no way to start a coaching relationship.
Speaker 1 (34:09):
Totally. Yeah. That feels very like not it feels kind
of like not erratic, but just like not stable, you know.
And if you can't build a business, you can't go
through a launch if you're like emotionally or literally unstable,
(34:29):
like if your mindset is unstable, you're like relying on
your results. That energy is gonna you know, transmute and
not necessarily that it like gets passed on to other people.
I mean, people can pick up stuff, but it I
think more so affects how we show up. Because these
people who are calling themselves six and seven figure coaches,
who haven't signed a client in six months, that I
(34:52):
think creates especially for people like us, who are honest
people and who are I guess like ethical or like
we have we just want to be like the best
version of ourselves and we want I think we pride
ourselves in being I guess transparent or there's something there
(35:14):
that we care we have there we go yeah. And
so I think that you know, when these six and
seven figure coaches are like sliding into your dms and
like I haven't you know, signed on a client in
a while, that is an integrity issue and that naturally,
you know, I talk about this as like resistance. It
naturally creates a resistance because what we're saying is not
(35:37):
in alignment with what is actually happening. And then I
think people just get lost in their brains like yeah,
and then how do you that pressure just comes from yourself, right,
you can literally take that pressure off by just choosing
to not identify with the money like that.
Speaker 2 (35:59):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (36:00):
So and that's the hard part because they see people
making lots of money or what they assume are people
that are making lots of money. So they feel like
that's the way that I get the clients. As if
I talk about this, I get the clients.
Speaker 2 (36:15):
Yeah, it's that vicious circle all over again.
Speaker 1 (36:17):
Totally. Let's talk about, like, I feel like these are
trends or like you know, patterns that have kind of
been in the business coaching industry or the coaching industry
as a whole, and I feel like people are kind
of starting to see through it.
Speaker 2 (36:34):
Yep.
Speaker 1 (36:35):
So let's talk about maybe like, Okay, how do you
promote yourself and like, you know, if you feel like
you're a multi passionate person, you don't want to put
yourself in a box. You don't want to overly identify
with your title or whatever. Like how do you show
up as like what I would call your most magnetic
self and like attract those people that are meant to
(36:58):
work with you.
Speaker 2 (36:59):
Yeah, I do.
Speaker 3 (37:00):
I know, first all, just be your magnetic self exactly,
so hard, right, but yeah, I mean that's part of
I think that's a big piece of it. Right, Like
I've had people come to me and say that they
wanted to come work with me simply because my energy
feels grounding and that's what they need, you know. On
(37:20):
the other side, like you still have to market and
say stuff. I think it's really for me, the answer
has been speaking to that ideal client, speaking to how
their brain operates, because I my client has a very
complex thinking process that results in overthinking imperfectionism. So being
(37:41):
able to talk about that so that it feels normal.
Speaker 1 (37:44):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (37:45):
So I think normalizing what your clients are feeling, sharing
that they're not the only ones who feel that way.
Speaker 2 (37:53):
Then it's been.
Speaker 3 (37:55):
About sharing that there's a solution and making that solution
look you. And that's kind of been my formula for it,
and I think that really helps because it's focused on them.
I think a lot of the marketing we've seen in
the past, especially with money especially I think specifically from
sales coaches who talk about their own sales like that's great,
(38:17):
but you're centering yourself in the conversation.
Speaker 2 (38:21):
Do you know how to teach that? Do you know
how to translate that to your clients?
Speaker 1 (38:26):
Totally?
Speaker 3 (38:27):
So I think for those that are doing well right now,
it's about centering it back on the client.
Speaker 2 (38:34):
What do they need to hear? What are they struggling with?
Like we all struggle this whole.
Speaker 3 (38:39):
I think idea of don't do pain point marketing. It's like, okay,
but don't be.
Speaker 2 (38:43):
An asshole about it.
Speaker 1 (38:44):
Yeah, you don't want to like stick a knife in
and like twist it around, but like to identify their
struggles and their challenges so we know what problem to
solve right exactly.
Speaker 3 (38:56):
Yeah, We're all going to hit roadblocks. That's just gonna happen.
We're human, We're not perfect.
Speaker 1 (39:04):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (39:04):
So I think really just speaking to where they're at
right now and making sure that they feel like they're
just not alone. And that has helped me because then
I can talk about any subject if I put it
within that framework. I can take that and we can
talk about imposter syndrome. But I can also go and
talk about your financial systems and how they're not you know,
(39:26):
working out the way you want them to. Or we
can take it and apply it to a marketing strategy
you're launching strategy like it doesn't matter, but they feel heard,
they feel seen, and they feel understood. And I think
even going back to our talk on boundaries, boundaries has
made people not feel seen and heard when we do too.
Speaker 2 (39:46):
Much of it.
Speaker 3 (39:47):
So bringing it back to the client making them feel
like they are part of something bigger.
Speaker 2 (39:53):
Yeah, that's how you do it.
Speaker 1 (39:55):
And that you're yeah, no, no, no, I completely agree.
I love how you you know, put that into a
like a formula, a framework, because for me, I don't
necessarily like always equate things, but I know that what
I'm doing is intentional. So for me, the shift has
been like what do I need to say to attract clients?
(40:15):
What do I need to do to like get more engagement?
And the shift that's worked better and that always works
better and that always gets the results that I want
is what do my clients need to hear from me today?
So it takes the focus, like you were saying, off
of me and like the results that I want to
(40:38):
create and what I'm here to do and what I
have to say, and puts the focus back onto like
how do I just show up and like serve today.
And that's been something that I consistently teach my clients
because it's so easy to get stuck in like analysis
paralysis or like what do they need to hear? Like
(41:00):
oh I keep getting this like I don't have the
money yet, how do I shift whatever? Whatever? Anyway, Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Speaker 3 (41:13):
Those are That's exactly what my client's say to me too.
It's like, Okay, but am I speaking to the right person?
And is this what they need to hear? And I'm like,
just sit down and write what do they need to
hear it? What do you want to say today to them?
If you had this person sitting in front of you
right now, what would you tell them? What would you
want to share with them? Yeah, And it makes the
writing process so much easier because it comes from that
(41:35):
human approach. Yeah, if I sat down and had a
conversation with you, I'm not going to think about like,
oh am I saying the right things?
Speaker 1 (41:43):
Is she receiving this.
Speaker 2 (41:44):
The right way? It's a conversation.
Speaker 1 (41:46):
M hm hm, that's it totally. Yeah, And yeah, just
like feeling hurt. So this is something I talk a
lot about when I teach on sales because I feel
like people people teach sales, they're like, oh, say this.
I had a client come to me and she was like, yeah,
this past coach that I hired told me to say.
Oh I just got goose bumps, Like that was literally
(42:09):
in the script, And I'm like, what the fuck? Like
can we not just teach people how to connect with
themselves and what they're feeling and express that? Like why
why does it have to be such a formula and
such a like it's so inauthentic to me that it
drives me crazy. I'm like, how are people out there
teaching these things?
Speaker 3 (42:31):
That's a phrase I would never use, right, like what's.
Speaker 2 (42:35):
Wrong with what?
Speaker 1 (42:37):
Yeah?
Speaker 2 (42:38):
But I funny, I've actually heard that. Really he said it.
Speaker 3 (42:42):
I can pinpoint and I at least one person that
I've heard say that to me.
Speaker 1 (42:47):
No way, Well there's somebody out there teaching people to
say that in their sales scripts, so watch out.
Speaker 3 (42:59):
Oh this is like, this is what's so hard about
the industry sometimes because it feels like there's so much faith.
Speaker 1 (43:06):
Trickery looking dumb. Yeah, but then okay, what is real?
Like y yeah, and then you and I are over
here trying to get like, you know, real results and
have real human connection and it's just sometimes it feels
like an upward battle on my end anyway. Yeah, no,
it does.
Speaker 2 (43:26):
I feel that, But then I always come back to you.
Speaker 3 (43:29):
Okay, but trust that you're going to find the right
person and you're not going to get Like I haven't
had a client issue since May twenty twenty one.
Speaker 1 (43:42):
Oh my god, me too, Right, it was like June. No,
it was June twenty twenty for me, and I knew
that it was going to be an issue, but I
didn't listen to myself exactly.
Speaker 2 (43:52):
Yeah, yeah, it was.
Speaker 3 (43:54):
It was definitely one of those fixed mindsets that you
can't change that. Yeah, it's I think really focusing and
like I said, like even going back to those people
who dropping in the DMS and or maybe thinking of
working with me, I'm like, yeah, no, not until you
change your bios, Like I'm not going to work with
people who aren't going to be in integrity with Yeah,
(44:19):
if you're you're not going to be ethical here, Like
I don't care if you stretch a story. And one
of the things that I teach my clients, especially clients
like I work with a lot of private clients who
you wouldn't know that I'm their coach. You wouldn't, So
(44:39):
I can't exactly tell their story in full because it
would be.
Speaker 2 (44:46):
Very clear who.
Speaker 3 (44:47):
I'm working with. So I do have to sometimes stretch
the story a little bit and change details a little bit.
And I think that that is different than putting like
this is a transformation, or this is a revenue result
and it's untrue or it's lacking clarity, like I had
(45:09):
a sixty one K week is different than I've had
sixty one thousand dollars in sales this week or sixty
one thousand dollars in cash this week, Like there are
differences in that.
Speaker 1 (45:23):
Yeah, yeah, exactly.
Speaker 2 (45:25):
I don't even know where that number came from, but.
Speaker 1 (45:28):
Whatever, maybe someone needed to hear that number today, I guess, so, yeah, no,
I have one hundred percent agree. And that to me,
as a beginner entrepreneur, wasn't clear, like when I was
seeing all those numbers, and then I found out that, like, oh,
there's a difference between cash received and like sales, right,
because when someone makes sales, they're usually their client is
(45:51):
on like a payment plan or it's like promised income
that sometimes doesn't always come through, especially if you have
problematic clients or you're like taking on clients that aren't
a good fit. And yeah, then I realized, like, oh,
so you know, technically, you know, someone could have like
a sixty one K week and that could be it
(46:11):
for the year, right, technically, you know, right like.
Speaker 3 (46:15):
That, you know, let's round it to sixty thousand. Right,
you're if you just did a sixty thousand dollars contract,
but you're serving them for a year, that's five thousand
a month. That's not quite as grand and as big
as I got sixty thousand today. You know for sure,
even if you got it all in cash today, it's
(46:36):
still stretches out over that year. Yeah, am, And it
limits you to who you can serve because now one
spot is gone for a year. It's all about context,
and I think, you know, speaking to trends, I think
people are seeing it now. I think honestly, like we
were talking about this before we started recording, but even
the introduction of threads, I feel like has like lifted
(46:58):
the veil a little bit on the industry. And I
think people are being really honest about things that they've
seen and they've heard, and I'm sure that it sometimes
feels a little negative or caddy, but it's also like
refreshing to see so much honesty about things we all
knew were going.
Speaker 1 (47:17):
On, Yeah, but no one was saying it.
Speaker 3 (47:20):
No one wanted to say it because then you'd be
that person.
Speaker 1 (47:23):
Right, And that's like, let's talk about that for a sec.
Because I feel like, you know, we both kind of
related on how Instagram started to feel like this hot
girl marketing kind of like our hot girl summer kind
of vibe, right, and it was like we're the cool people,
you're not. And I've never been part of like the
(47:43):
popular group, so I was definitely not like there. Yeah,
but I think it's it's hard, Like I definitely tried
to like still, you know, show up in a way
that was like attractive, and you know, people are out
there teaching these absurd things. Like I saw somebody be like,
oh my god. I saw this person respond to a
(48:06):
Facebook comment and the Facebook request for help was like
help me to attract clients, And I click on this
this woman posted and this like I really don't want
to bash people or talk shit, but like, man.
Speaker 2 (48:23):
Have go just in tragerty.
Speaker 1 (48:29):
It's the integrity piece, right, So her like six step
process to attract more clients was the first one was
post or get your show stopping your scroll stopping selfie.
And I'm like, that has nothing to do with attracting clients.
Speaker 3 (48:53):
A selfie, but it does because it speaks to that
vanity that we have sometimes right right, yeah not but
it doesn't mean you're intracting the right people, no.
Speaker 4 (49:05):
So, but it just feels like like it's it's part
of it, Like obviously we have to have something to post,
but it just feels so surface level to me.
Speaker 1 (49:17):
And I'm like, what's really actually gonna attract clients? Because like,
i can post a selfie, but if I'm not like
speaking from the heart, if I'm not actually sharing my
values or like my beliefs or my thought processes or
speaking to the people who like want to work with me,
then a selfie is not going to do anything.
Speaker 3 (49:42):
And yeah it does, I'm actually so I'm like, as
you can probably tell, I'm a researcher, I'm an observer.
So I like observe somebody for a really long time
and I look through their whole process.
Speaker 2 (49:54):
How are they.
Speaker 3 (49:54):
Getting clients, what are they taking people through, what are
their techniques and tricks? Right, And I don't know why
I do it, it just do it, and it helps because
then I get to say, Okay, I've seen this, this
I think would work for you because of X y Z,
why don't we explore that. But that being said, I
have noticed a trend with a particular crowd that they
(50:17):
focus more on saying nothing showing up beautifully, really like
poking people. So they talk about, oh mean, girl marketing
is out, but then do like a very shadowed version
of toxic neangiral marketing anyway, and they're getting clients, but
then they're also the ones again complaining that they have
(50:39):
clients defaulting on payments and that clients are like not
respecting them or not respecting their processes, or you should
be in all my programs, you know, not just waiting
for me to open up something just for you. That
that sort of thing. And I find that really interesting
because I'm like, yeah, sure, you're attracting clients with this
sort of marketing, but you're not a tracking the right clients, right.
(51:02):
Those of us that are actually sitting here are saying like,
this is what I know, this is my message, this
is the information I want to give you, and being
very transparent.
Speaker 2 (51:12):
We may not be getting.
Speaker 3 (51:13):
The volume of clients, but sure, shit, we're getting the
clients that are meant to be in our containers. And
it's like I think for most people I talk to
you about this, we're also getting the clients who are
sticking with us. We're not just having to go out
and look for new clients all the time because we
have clients re signing, you know, contract after contract after contract,
(51:35):
because we still have the ability to serve them.
Speaker 1 (51:37):
Yeah. Yeah, you're so right, because I have seen that,
and I've always wondered, like how My immediate assumption is
that it's just all made up that they're not getting clients,
you know, because I'm like, how the fuck does somebody
get clients by just doing that. I've like tried, you know,
just like putting oh fun selfies and stuff, and it's
(52:00):
like it doesn't work. Like that was a tactic I tried,
you know, during my whole like hibernation phase a year
and a half two years ago. And yeah, it just
so it's interesting. What comes to mind is human design.
Do you remember what your profile is? Yeah, I'm a
six to two interesting. Interesting, Yeah, So I just wonder,
(52:24):
like I notice a lot of fives, Like people with
a five in their profile can pull that strategy off. Yeah, charismatic, Yes,
oh here's my selfie and here's what I'm up to,
and and fives have this sort of like allure to them.
My god. And what's so interesting too that I just
remembered is there's something in one of the books that
(52:48):
I read on human design. It says something around like
be careful not to over sell or like you know,
when you lift the veil, is like what behind it?
Actually true because they can tend to This isn't a
bad thing, it's just something to be aware of, but
they can tend to kind of you know, build this
whole illusion that's like, you know, behind the illusion. I mean,
(53:10):
it's obviously an illusion. So yeah, it's interesting how energetic
and personality I mean it I guess so the lines
are more your personality. So it's just fascinating how all
of that kind of comes into play because I so
you like to observe like what works. I like to
connect it back to human design and be like, okay,
what's working for like each different design profile, like all
(53:34):
of those things.
Speaker 3 (53:35):
So as soon as you said fives, I was like, yeah, yeah, yeah,
it's so Yeah. I just like, now I'm thinking about
all the things I've been told that people have taught
coming from that same group, like intrusive eye contact in
your view heard of this, no, or you make this
(53:58):
really intense, like very intrusive, like like I'm staring right through.
Speaker 2 (54:04):
You type of eye contact as a method for sales.
Speaker 1 (54:08):
Ew that makes me. That gives me goosebumps, But they do.
Speaker 3 (54:14):
And yeah, it's these things and I'm like, you know
what I would rather do my thoughts, like I always
look up.
Speaker 2 (54:20):
I'd rather do that.
Speaker 3 (54:22):
Yeah, you can listen to my words and if it resonates,
great And if you think I'm boring, fine, move.
Speaker 1 (54:27):
On right right right. Yeah, I'm always like looking somewhere else.
I'm like, should I be looking like at the camera,
and I'm like off in my world, trying to pull
the information in. But yeah, it's what works. And I
think the moral of all of this is like understanding
for me human design has been so helpful because it's like, Okay,
these things work for these people, these things work for
(54:48):
these people, and this is what works for me. And
I think the more that we can lean into that,
like what works for us and and what we feel
called to do. I think the better off we are
in general, like not just with business results, but in
life too, everything like fuck what other people say, fuck
(55:08):
what other people do, Like, just keep focusing on what
you are here to do.
Speaker 2 (55:15):
Yep, yeah, yep, yep, yep. I was like, yep, yeah
it is.
Speaker 3 (55:23):
And I had a thought actually as you were saying this,
and I, oh, shoot, no, it's gone.
Speaker 1 (55:28):
Well. I feel like that's a very beautiful note to
leave off. Do you want to add any final thoughts?
Speaker 3 (55:36):
No, I think like that that is the perfect way.
It's just like you do you and to note the
noise that is not meant for you and really be
discerning on who you work with, like get to know them,
and if they don't want to get to know you,
then they're probably not meant to be in your world.
Speaker 1 (55:59):
Yeah, definitely. You know, when you're looking at other people's
content and if their voice is making your head spin,
I feel like that's not the right content for us
to be digesting. We all go through like I feel
like people really underestimate or feel like they're on a
different path, you know, like people in the beginning, they're like, oh, well,
(56:23):
I'm new here, and it's like we all go through
the same shit. Honestly, Like, it doesn't matter if you're new,
if you've been here five, ten, fifteen years. I think
part of being in this business is just what it is.
It's like we get lost in the in the crap
and the stuff, and it's hard sometimes to tune out
(56:44):
that noise, you know, and to not get sucked into
all of that stuff. And sometimes we're not even aware
that it's happening, like with the introduction of threads, right Like,
I didn't realize how inauthentic it felt to be on
Instagram until I was on Threads and I was like, Wow,
this feels so good.
Speaker 3 (57:03):
I have evidence for this, so we can leave this
kind of is that last thought if you want, But
here's my evidence. I work with people from starting their
business to eight figures. That's my range of clientele right now.
Those are the revenues that my clients are making. I
(57:24):
am doing the exact same work with the with them,
whether they're at zero dollars or eight figures. It is
exactly the same work. They go through, exactly the same problems.
We are still looking at their businesses in almost exactly
the same way. And I would say, in fact, it's
(57:45):
even harder once you're at these higher levels because you've
kind of got to burn away pieces that they've built
that probably weren't meant for them. So yeah, if you
are comparing yourself to anybody, just knowing that they are
going through the exact same things as you, it doesn't change.
You will continue to go through these same issues year
(58:07):
after year, revenue point after revenue point. So manage them,
focus on them, focus on you. Do what you want
to do, and that is what's going to create your success.
Speaker 1 (58:20):
Right. I love that so much. If there's anything I've
learned over the last couple of years, it's been the patterns,
Like the same patterns show up, it's just a different way.
So if you can learn how to navigate those you know,
patterns or those I'm calling them patterns but like challenges
difficulties like, then you know, the easier it'll be to
(58:41):
continue to show up. Thank you. This was awesome. It's
been so good to chat with you. Thank you so
much for tuning into the podcast today. If you like
what you heard, I would love it if you left
a review. If you like my vibe, come and hang
with me in my Facebook or Telegram group. I'll drop
the link to my email list below, or you can
get instant access. Make sure you check the show notes
(59:04):
for any other links that I mentioned today, and until
next time, I'm sending you waves of abundance.
Popular Podcasts
Stuff You Should Know
If you've ever wanted to know about champagne, satanism, the Stonewall Uprising, chaos theory, LSD, El Nino, true crime and Rosa Parks, then look no further. Josh and Chuck have you covered.
Dateline NBC
Current and classic episodes, featuring compelling true-crime mysteries, powerful documentaries and in-depth investigations. Special Summer Offer: Exclusively on Apple Podcasts, try our Dateline Premium subscription completely free for one month! With Dateline Premium, you get every episode ad-free plus exclusive bonus content.
On Purpose with Jay Shetty
I’m Jay Shetty host of On Purpose the worlds #1 Mental Health podcast and I’m so grateful you found us. I started this podcast 5 years ago to invite you into conversations and workshops that are designed to help make you happier, healthier and more healed. I believe that when you (yes you) feel seen, heard and understood you’re able to deal with relationship struggles, work challenges and life’s ups and downs with more ease and grace. I interview experts, celebrities, thought leaders and athletes so that we can grow our mindset, build better habits and uncover a side of them we’ve never seen before. New episodes every Monday and Friday. Your support means the world to me and I don’t take it for granted — click the follow button and leave a review to help us spread the love with On Purpose. I can’t wait for you to listen to your first or 500th episode!