July 27, 2025 • 9 mins
Remember This, You may Have been Broken, But You Are Not Beyond Repair
Speaking appearances for Businesses, Churches, Auxiliaries,
Jr. High & High Schools, Men Groups, Women Groups or Conferences,
Non-Profit Organizations, Youth Groups, and Parenting Groups.
For More Information Please Contact Us at: Arrested.Development.G51@gmail.com
Follow Us Where You Get Your Podcasts or
www.twitter.com/FollowADM
www.arrested-development-ministry.blogspot.com
www.facebook.com/pages/Arrested-Development-Ministry
Help us reach our annual goal of $5,000 To Help Donate to RAINN.org and THORN.org
For more information from Life Skills International: https://www.lifeskillsintl.org/
Speaking appearances for Businesses, Churches, Auxiliaries,
Jr. High & High Schools, Men Groups, Women Groups or Conferences,
Non-Profit Organizations, Youth Groups, and Parenting Groups.
For More Information Please Contact Us at: Arrested.Development.G51@gmail.com
Follow Us Where You Get Your Podcasts or
www.twitter.com/FollowADM
www.arrested-development-ministry.blogspot.com
www.facebook.com/pages/Arrested-Development-Ministry
Help us reach our annual goal of $5,000 To Help Donate to RAINN.org and THORN.org
For more information from Life Skills International: https://www.lifeskillsintl.org/
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:03):
Child wounded by rejection, incest, molestation, emotional, physical, and sexual
abuse can become an adult functioning in childish ways, not
being able to put away childish things. Listen to arrested
development ministries and hear the hearts of victims who have
(00:27):
become victims and sufferers who are now survivors. Learn what
great things God can do for you to heal your
heart wherever you hurt.
Speaker 2 (01:20):
It seems we're answering a lot of questions or trying
to answer a lot of questions, and one of the
big ones is do opposites attract? And let me explain this,
and it's not going to be a real short explanation,
But if I've been wounded in childhood, my core development
emotionally does not mature. So I develop a pseudo personality.
(01:48):
And what happens in this pseudo personality. I developed this
pseudo so that if you meet me, hopefully you'll like
me and won't reject me. So if a wounded man,
and it's called jackal hyde in domestic violence, but the
(02:09):
pseudo personality, a wounded man will will put the best
foot forward because he doesn't want to be rejected by
the woman that he has zeroed in on. She has
probably been wounded, and he senses that but doesn't know
how he senses it. It's something that we project, but
it's not a conscious level thing. And she's got a
(02:33):
suit of personality because she's been wounded. Now I'll complicate
this just a little bit more. If I have not
had my parenting completed in childhood, then my arrested development,
undeveloped core that's frozen will search for a mommy figure subconsciously.
(02:57):
And if a woman has had a father daughter glitch
like an absent father, an abusive father, a rigid father,
that type of thing, then she knows what she's looking
for in a man to complete childhood, not to pair
up for a lifetime. So she will look for someone
(03:18):
that's that can fulfill what her father didn't. So if
things were tough at home, I want somebody. If I
didn't have a father, I want somebody who's maybe clinging
a man who's clinging. So opposite seem to attract because
we're wounded, and people really take that for granted. That's
(03:42):
that's a true statement. Yeah, we are attracted to an opposite.
But when the honeymoon is over and you're on with life.
You've married the same profile as where you came from
and what you hated. That's scary. See. And so in counseling,
(04:04):
so much of the time I work with men that
married a woman who he was attracted to, maybe physically,
but she ended up turning into his mommy, trying to
change him, make herself safe, all those kind of things,
and so she ends up mothering. So that tells us
(04:27):
that in the software, in our Olympic system, in the software,
there's a mothering instinct that's natural, but there's not a
wifing instinct. It's a learned thing. So if we then
have been wounded in childhood and he marries, and he
marries a woman that's been wounded, she does not know
(04:49):
how to be a wife, she's never been trained to
be a wife, and she will end up mothering him.
And the same thing on the other side of it,
if she is lacking in completion of the father thing
in her life, she will see again, as we've talked before,
the even abuse seems to be a strong man to
(05:11):
a woman who's been raised familiar with that territory. So
what we end up with is somebody just like who
we didn't want because we were looking at the pseudo personality,
not the core personality that was undeveloped. See, and that
really gets interesting in that dynamic. It's all fixable, and
(05:32):
that's what we do life skills. We can take someone
who a man who married his mommy and didn't think
he was, but he ended up that way, and we
can reroute the wiring in the brain literally with knowledge
and the way that we do things to where he
will start to see her as a wife, not a mommy.
(05:53):
And that's why we like it when both come to
life skills, because she will start to stay in a
wife mom mode and not get into that mother mode
trying to change in. So the hope is to get
the right information to understand your situation, and then the
information and the way we teach the brain to process
(06:16):
it brings us to a piece beyond our wireless imaginations.
That's what this is about.
Speaker 1 (06:32):
You have been listening to Arrested Development Ministry online. Always
remember you may have been broken, but you are not
beyond repair. For more information, feedback, or to contact us
for speaking engagements, email Arrested dot Development dot G five
to one at gmail dot com. You can find us
(06:55):
on Facebook Twitter, listen online on blog talk local radio
dot com, or visit our website. This outreach is sponsored
by Revelations Media LLLC.
Speaker 3 (07:11):
Every two minutes, someone in America has sexually assaulted. The
attack may last just moments, but the effects can last
a lifetime. There is help through the National Sexual Assault Hotline.
Call one eight hundred sixty five six hope or visit
RAIN dot org. You don't need to go it alone,
and it's never too late to get help.
Speaker 4 (07:31):
Think about your mother, your sister, your girlfriend. One in
six women is a victim of sexual assault. Now think
about your father, your brother, your best friend. Men are
victims too. Rape can happen to anyone. This is Christina
Ricci with RAIN, encouraging you to call the National Sexual
Assault Hotline to learn how to support someone you love.
(07:52):
Call one eight hundred sixty five six hope or visit
RAIN dot org. That's r AI n N dot org.
Speaker 1 (08:00):
Brought to you by RAIN and this station.
Speaker 4 (08:07):
Every two minutes, someone is actually assaulted. Half of victims
are under the age of eighteen. Children are told by
their abusers not to tell.
Speaker 1 (08:14):
I have to keep a secret. Most children know their abusers.
Speaker 4 (08:19):
I don't have to keep a secret. If you can't
tell your parents, tell someone else, and keep telling and
telling until someone listens. Always tell if someone tries to
touch you.
Speaker 1 (08:35):
I'll have to keep a secret.
Speaker 4 (08:41):
I have the right to be protected, to be left
alone to express my sin.
Speaker 1 (08:46):
I have the right to be free.
Speaker 2 (08:47):
To be free, to be free, I have to like
to be free.
Speaker 4 (08:53):
Are you keeping a secret? If you're being sexually abused,
You're not alone. It's not your fault.
Speaker 1 (08:59):
There is someone who can help. I will shall tie
Child wounded by rejection, incest, molestation, emotional, physical, and sexual
abuse can become an adult functioning in childish ways, not
being able to put away childish things. Listen to arrested
development ministries and hear the hearts of victims who have
(00:27):
become victims and sufferers who are now survivors. Learn what
great things God can do for you to heal your
heart wherever you hurt.
Speaker 2 (01:20):
It seems we're answering a lot of questions or trying
to answer a lot of questions, and one of the
big ones is do opposites attract? And let me explain this,
and it's not going to be a real short explanation,
But if I've been wounded in childhood, my core development
emotionally does not mature. So I develop a pseudo personality.
(01:48):
And what happens in this pseudo personality. I developed this
pseudo so that if you meet me, hopefully you'll like
me and won't reject me. So if a wounded man,
and it's called jackal hyde in domestic violence, but the
(02:09):
pseudo personality, a wounded man will will put the best
foot forward because he doesn't want to be rejected by
the woman that he has zeroed in on. She has
probably been wounded, and he senses that but doesn't know
how he senses it. It's something that we project, but
it's not a conscious level thing. And she's got a
(02:33):
suit of personality because she's been wounded. Now I'll complicate
this just a little bit more. If I have not
had my parenting completed in childhood, then my arrested development,
undeveloped core that's frozen will search for a mommy figure subconsciously.
(02:57):
And if a woman has had a father daughter glitch
like an absent father, an abusive father, a rigid father,
that type of thing, then she knows what she's looking
for in a man to complete childhood, not to pair
up for a lifetime. So she will look for someone
(03:18):
that's that can fulfill what her father didn't. So if
things were tough at home, I want somebody. If I
didn't have a father, I want somebody who's maybe clinging
a man who's clinging. So opposite seem to attract because
we're wounded, and people really take that for granted. That's
(03:42):
that's a true statement. Yeah, we are attracted to an opposite.
But when the honeymoon is over and you're on with life.
You've married the same profile as where you came from
and what you hated. That's scary. See. And so in counseling,
(04:04):
so much of the time I work with men that
married a woman who he was attracted to, maybe physically,
but she ended up turning into his mommy, trying to
change him, make herself safe, all those kind of things,
and so she ends up mothering. So that tells us
(04:27):
that in the software, in our Olympic system, in the software,
there's a mothering instinct that's natural, but there's not a
wifing instinct. It's a learned thing. So if we then
have been wounded in childhood and he marries, and he
marries a woman that's been wounded, she does not know
(04:49):
how to be a wife, she's never been trained to
be a wife, and she will end up mothering him.
And the same thing on the other side of it,
if she is lacking in completion of the father thing
in her life, she will see again, as we've talked before,
the even abuse seems to be a strong man to
(05:11):
a woman who's been raised familiar with that territory. So
what we end up with is somebody just like who
we didn't want because we were looking at the pseudo personality,
not the core personality that was undeveloped. See, and that
really gets interesting in that dynamic. It's all fixable, and
(05:32):
that's what we do life skills. We can take someone
who a man who married his mommy and didn't think
he was, but he ended up that way, and we
can reroute the wiring in the brain literally with knowledge
and the way that we do things to where he
will start to see her as a wife, not a mommy.
(05:53):
And that's why we like it when both come to
life skills, because she will start to stay in a
wife mom mode and not get into that mother mode
trying to change in. So the hope is to get
the right information to understand your situation, and then the
information and the way we teach the brain to process
(06:16):
it brings us to a piece beyond our wireless imaginations.
That's what this is about.
Speaker 1 (06:32):
You have been listening to Arrested Development Ministry online. Always
remember you may have been broken, but you are not
beyond repair. For more information, feedback, or to contact us
for speaking engagements, email Arrested dot Development dot G five
to one at gmail dot com. You can find us
(06:55):
on Facebook Twitter, listen online on blog talk local radio
dot com, or visit our website. This outreach is sponsored
by Revelations Media LLLC.
Speaker 3 (07:11):
Every two minutes, someone in America has sexually assaulted. The
attack may last just moments, but the effects can last
a lifetime. There is help through the National Sexual Assault Hotline.
Call one eight hundred sixty five six hope or visit
RAIN dot org. You don't need to go it alone,
and it's never too late to get help.
Speaker 4 (07:31):
Think about your mother, your sister, your girlfriend. One in
six women is a victim of sexual assault. Now think
about your father, your brother, your best friend. Men are
victims too. Rape can happen to anyone. This is Christina
Ricci with RAIN, encouraging you to call the National Sexual
Assault Hotline to learn how to support someone you love.
(07:52):
Call one eight hundred sixty five six hope or visit
RAIN dot org. That's r AI n N dot org.
Speaker 1 (08:00):
Brought to you by RAIN and this station.
Speaker 4 (08:07):
Every two minutes, someone is actually assaulted. Half of victims
are under the age of eighteen. Children are told by
their abusers not to tell.
Speaker 1 (08:14):
I have to keep a secret. Most children know their abusers.
Speaker 4 (08:19):
I don't have to keep a secret. If you can't
tell your parents, tell someone else, and keep telling and
telling until someone listens. Always tell if someone tries to
touch you.
Speaker 1 (08:35):
I'll have to keep a secret.
Speaker 4 (08:41):
I have the right to be protected, to be left
alone to express my sin.
Speaker 1 (08:46):
I have the right to be free.
Speaker 2 (08:47):
To be free, to be free, I have to like
to be free.
Speaker 4 (08:53):
Are you keeping a secret? If you're being sexually abused,
You're not alone. It's not your fault.
Speaker 1 (08:59):
There is someone who can help. I will shall tie
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