December 7, 2025 • 12 mins
Shannan Kym grew up in a family where addiction, violence, and extreme dysfunction were normalized. Robbed of her childhood, she was forced to grow up at a very young age. After not graduating from high school and leaving her family, she was filled with self-loathing and shame. Suppressing her feelings, Shannan became an alcoholic. For years, she abused her body, gained excessive weight, and let herself be taken advantage of by toxic people, including marrying a narcissist. She experienced career highs and lows and suffered the loss of a child. Eventually, Shannan hit rock bottom, but on August 17, 2019, everything changed. That day, Shannan made up her mind to stop letting addiction control her life. She also decided to get real, let go of her past hurts, embrace forgiveness, and focus on living each day with gratitude, purpose, light, and love. In her new book, FIND THE ANSWERS WITHIN YOU: Ten Pathways Toward Self-Discovery Shannan breaks out her book in three sections, not only revealing her tragedies to triumphs but also ten pathways for any reader to be inspired to live by: In Part I, Shannan tells her story of trauma and addiction. The youngest of eight, Shannan was four when her father, a violent alcoholic, took his own life. Soon after, her eldest brother, at age 20, became the abusive, hard-drinking man of the house. Broken, twisted, and cruel, Walter took pleasure in pinching, hitting, punching, kicking, bullying, and berating Shannan and her sisters—enabled by their mother. To escape the fear and hatred she felt toward her brother, Shannan turned to alcohol in high school. For many years after, she continued to seek solace in bottles of wine, which only aggravated her insecurities, anxiety, and depression. Part II follows Shannan’s healing journey. In this section, Shannan lets readers in on what she learned—from her hellish childhood, toxic relationships, troubled marriage, and determination to change—to help them draw lessons from their own experiences. Stressing how self-worth begins with awareness, Shannan reveals how she came to speak her truth about being an addict, identify and manage her triggers for drinking, and got out of being stuck in her own story. She also shares how she took responsibility for her actions, forgave and said goodbye to those who hurt her, overcame self-criticism and perfectionism, committed to healthy eating, exercise, and treating her body with care, and cultivated a mindset of gratitude. Ultimately, Shannan recognized trauma as a gift for what it taught her, about others and herself, and how it led her to discover her life’s purpose.
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
I'm not just a podcaster. I'm a podcast connoisseur. That
means I listen, I study, I pay close attention. But
when it comes to variety, how many times have you
gone to somebody's streaming website and when nope, nope, nope, nope, nope,
nope nope. Okay, now you know why we created erow
dot net a R r oe dot net, seventeen different
(00:22):
styles of podcasts to choose from. Enjoy your exploration.
Speaker 2 (00:26):
Good morning, how are you?
Speaker 1 (00:28):
How are you doing?
Speaker 2 (00:29):
Oh? I'm absolutely wonderful. How are you today?
Speaker 1 (00:33):
Ero looking forward to sharing a conversation with you because
you and I share so much in common when it
comes to discovering that self on the inside and then
using them not only as a best friend, but as
a tool. Exactly, exactly, now, when did you realize that
it was time to put the focus on the inside,
(00:54):
Because so many times, especially when you're growing up, they go, oh,
you're so into yourself. Well, then as an adult going yeah,
I got to get into myself so I can figure
out where I'm going.
Speaker 2 (01:05):
I would have to say Arrow that it really did.
It took me to hit rock bottom to realize that
the outside world is not going to help me out anymore.
And when I hit rock bottom, as I talk about
in my book, August seventeenth or twenty nineteen, and then
I had my awakening. That was when I really focused
(01:26):
on myself, what is it that I can do for
myself because what's happening is not working. And then after
that it was the realization of why why do I
want to change? And once I realized what my whys were,
that was when it was like a pivotal moment where
I need to start working on myself because nobody else
(01:48):
is going to do it for me at all.
Speaker 1 (01:51):
Why won't you change is such a very important question
because that next step is how am I going to change.
Speaker 2 (02:00):
Exactly exactly? And that was when I realized that I
really needed to start to sit in my stillness. And
most of us are so afraid of that because at
that point in our life, when we're sitting in our stillness,
when all of the triggers start to pop up, things
that we don't want to talk about or think about,
(02:22):
that's when it all comes to surface. But people really
need to realize that when you're sitting in your stillness
and all of these triggers and these memories and all
of that start to pop up. It's actually a gift.
These are the things that you need to heal in
order to go forward, which is your tool that needs
(02:42):
to heal, which is going to take you to the
next level of elevation to get you where you're meant
to be, to find your greatness. And also people need
to realize too that once you also sit in your
stillness all the pain that surfaces, your purpose is in
your pain and you need to feel that, and that's
what's also going to get you to your next level.
Speaker 1 (03:04):
See. And I think that's what people are afraid of,
because everything that I've ever studied, they all say the
reason why we live in our past is because we
know it already, whereas the future we don't know it.
And so people go, I'm okay, I'm gonna stay right here.
I'm good.
Speaker 2 (03:20):
I really truly believe that most of us live in
our pain is because like live in our past, live
in our past is because the pain is so hurtful, yes,
and we don't know how to go forward. We don't
think that word that we are worthy enough to go forward,
and so what we do is we replay our pain.
(03:41):
Over and over and over again, because then that actually
does become our normal.
Speaker 1 (03:46):
Please do not move. There's more with Shannon Kim coming
up next. The name of her book Answers Within You.
We are back with Shannon Kim Sha n A in
k y M. One of the focuses that you have
is is speaking the truth about being an addict without
(04:07):
sounding like the typical addict. And and so when when
you talk about what you just did, it's it's everything
just goes together like a puzzle with you.
Speaker 2 (04:19):
Yeah, you know what, I'm gonna be honest with you, Erro.
I have done so much work on myself. Yes, And
the biggest, the biggest shift that happened with me was
was when I took accountability. And once I took accountability
for everything that took place in my life, that was
(04:40):
when things totally changed for me. Because you do get
to an age in your life where you got to
start taking responsibility. You can no longer act like the
victimy And that was a big That was a big
thing for me, was when I no longer acted like
a victim, and once I could see everything in my life,
(05:01):
you know, right from a childhood right up until like
even to this day. I look back at my life
and I talk about this one particular in my chapter
thanks you for doing me wrong? Yeah, And I look
at every scenario, every situation, every person that wronged me
(05:23):
or whatever they were put in my life for a
particular reason. They were there to teach me a lesson.
And I could either take that lesson and acknowledge that
lesson and move forward, or I could play victim. Well
with me, I'm not a victim. I am moving forward
(05:43):
in any of those situations that I learned from. I
grew but not only from that, you know, I actually
teach these things to other people, because that is so important.
People are in your life for two reasons. This is
how I look at it. I simplify it very simple.
Two people there, if they're in your life for two reasons.
One for me to really pay attention to what they're
(06:06):
teaching me, and also for them to be really paying
attention to what they're learning from me. It's very simple.
It's really simple if you really look at it. Anybody
that is listening to this today, as you go throughout
your day, really become aware and pay attention of that
(06:29):
other person that you're interacting with. And I'm talking about
whether it's a ten second interaction or if it's like
a twenty minute interaction, there is something that was brought
in that person to teach you. Whether you're just walking
down the street arrow and you're noticing something in somebody
else as you're walking by, in that person that you're
(06:51):
looking at, what is it that you're noticing? Are you
noticing that they're overweight? Well? Why are you noticing that?
Because that's the reflection of truly what's happening with you? Yes? Right, yeah,
so you're look at you're noticing that that person is overweight.
Oh okay, so what is it about that that's really
bothering you? Is it because you are looking at yourself
and thinking that you are overweight? Bingo? Do you know
(07:14):
what I mean? It's just I got the shivers right
now thinking about it, because most people don't think like
I think.
Speaker 1 (07:21):
Do you think that's a trip through empathy in the
way that when when you sit there and you go,
why would you feel this way if they triggered it?
I mean, it's almost like you're putting yourself in their
shoes to better understand by way of empathy.
Speaker 2 (07:36):
Absolutely, absolutely, because I really feel that there's love and grace,
patience in every single one of us. And once you
become aware that that's exactly what it is, and you
can have love and compassion to yourself because that's what
most of us lack. That's what most of us lack
and other than compassion for ourselves. And that's why I
(08:00):
want to stress to every single person out there that
you need to start sitting in your stillness, those silent
moments that you have with yourself. That's where you're going
to find the love, patience, empathy, grace, all of that
is within yourself. That's where you find out where you
truly love yourself. So I explain all of this in
(08:21):
my book and it is an absolutely wonderful and amazing thing.
And now I'm at the point in my life where
I love. I love being with myself. I love being
in my silence. I love being because whenever I've got
a problem errow, I know that's what I need to
stick with myself because all my answers are within anything
(08:43):
that's happening on the outside world. I've literally created. I've
created myself, whether it be doubt or jealousy, whatever it
can be. I created that So when I stick in
my stillness with myself and my office or in my
chair in my life room or whatever it is, I
ask myself the question, why, Shannon, is this happening?
Speaker 1 (09:05):
Yeah?
Speaker 2 (09:06):
And I'll get the answer, and that's what I have
to change within me.
Speaker 1 (09:11):
Don't you think that's because you also put a lot
of focus on the difference between recovery and healing, Because
if you're starting to ask yourself questions, it's like, it's like,
I want to heal, but I also want to recover.
But there is a difference in this, and you know
there's a very fine line there.
Speaker 2 (09:27):
Yes, yes, I see. I look at myself too as
absolutely I wanted to heal, there's no question, but I
look at healing and addiction something and on totally. Like
you said, there there's a difference there. To say, for example,
if if I don't tell people that you know, I'm
(09:49):
an alcoholic, right, that carries an identity from my past.
That's not who I am. Do I believe? Do I
believe the arrow that I'm an alcoholic? Absolutely not. That
was an identity that I carried of myself long ago.
And that's the problem, you know, I find with a
lot of these labels out there. I don't have to
(10:09):
carry that forward to the rest of my life. I
was somebody that was addicted. I am not anymore because
that's not who I am anymore. I look at myself
now as I am strong, I am successful, I am powerful,
I am an amazing individual, I am an amazing mother.
That's what you need to concentrate on now. It's those
(10:30):
people that get stuck that keep on thinking that they
are an alcoholic or a drug addict or whatever, and
they keep on labeling themselves that's for the rest of
their life. You will never ever stare me say want no.
You will hear me say the positive thing.
Speaker 1 (10:44):
Wow.
Speaker 2 (10:45):
And that's why I truly believe that. You know, people
relapse over and over and over again because they aren't
taught to tools to go forward in the future. You
know that, Like I said, that was my past. These individuals,
that's your past. That's not who you are. You are
not that you are whoever you decide you want to
(11:06):
whoever you decide to be. So that's where you create
that new identity of what you choose to be for
the rest of your life.
Speaker 1 (11:16):
Where can people go to find out more about you?
Miss Shannon Kim because I mean they need to know
your journey and how committed to the community you really are.
Speaker 2 (11:26):
They can follow me on Instagram, Facebook, Shannon Kim. They
can contact me at Shannonkim dot com, my website, or
they can also go onto my LinkedIn which is also
Shannon Kim.
Speaker 1 (11:39):
It's Shannon as a sah A n N A in.
So make sure that you know that they know that
A is in there and not a O.
Speaker 2 (11:47):
Yes. And also Kim is k y M, it's not
k I am so yeah, I'm not spelter to the
traditional way at all because I'm not a traditional person,
you know what I mean.
Speaker 1 (11:59):
Yeah, I love well, please come back to this show
anytime in the future because the door is always going
to be open for you.
Speaker 2 (12:09):
Oh, thank you so much, Erro, and I just want
to stay. You know, I have a wonderful day, and
thank you so much for having me on you know,
your show. I deeply appreciate it.
Speaker 1 (12:18):
Will you be brilliant?
Speaker 2 (12:20):
Okay you as well.
I'm not just a podcaster. I'm a podcast connoisseur. That
means I listen, I study, I pay close attention. But
when it comes to variety, how many times have you
gone to somebody's streaming website and when nope, nope, nope, nope, nope,
nope nope. Okay, now you know why we created erow
dot net a R r oe dot net, seventeen different
(00:22):
styles of podcasts to choose from. Enjoy your exploration.
Speaker 2 (00:26):
Good morning, how are you?
Speaker 1 (00:28):
How are you doing?
Speaker 2 (00:29):
Oh? I'm absolutely wonderful. How are you today?
Speaker 1 (00:33):
Ero looking forward to sharing a conversation with you because
you and I share so much in common when it
comes to discovering that self on the inside and then
using them not only as a best friend, but as
a tool. Exactly, exactly, now, when did you realize that
it was time to put the focus on the inside,
(00:54):
Because so many times, especially when you're growing up, they go, oh,
you're so into yourself. Well, then as an adult going yeah,
I got to get into myself so I can figure
out where I'm going.
Speaker 2 (01:05):
I would have to say Arrow that it really did.
It took me to hit rock bottom to realize that
the outside world is not going to help me out anymore.
And when I hit rock bottom, as I talk about
in my book, August seventeenth or twenty nineteen, and then
I had my awakening. That was when I really focused
(01:26):
on myself, what is it that I can do for
myself because what's happening is not working. And then after
that it was the realization of why why do I
want to change? And once I realized what my whys were,
that was when it was like a pivotal moment where
I need to start working on myself because nobody else
(01:48):
is going to do it for me at all.
Speaker 1 (01:51):
Why won't you change is such a very important question
because that next step is how am I going to change.
Speaker 2 (02:00):
Exactly exactly? And that was when I realized that I
really needed to start to sit in my stillness. And
most of us are so afraid of that because at
that point in our life, when we're sitting in our stillness,
when all of the triggers start to pop up, things
that we don't want to talk about or think about,
(02:22):
that's when it all comes to surface. But people really
need to realize that when you're sitting in your stillness
and all of these triggers and these memories and all
of that start to pop up. It's actually a gift.
These are the things that you need to heal in
order to go forward, which is your tool that needs
(02:42):
to heal, which is going to take you to the
next level of elevation to get you where you're meant
to be, to find your greatness. And also people need
to realize too that once you also sit in your
stillness all the pain that surfaces, your purpose is in
your pain and you need to feel that, and that's
what's also going to get you to your next level.
Speaker 1 (03:04):
See. And I think that's what people are afraid of,
because everything that I've ever studied, they all say the
reason why we live in our past is because we
know it already, whereas the future we don't know it.
And so people go, I'm okay, I'm gonna stay right here.
I'm good.
Speaker 2 (03:20):
I really truly believe that most of us live in
our pain is because like live in our past, live
in our past is because the pain is so hurtful, yes,
and we don't know how to go forward. We don't
think that word that we are worthy enough to go forward,
and so what we do is we replay our pain.
(03:41):
Over and over and over again, because then that actually
does become our normal.
Speaker 1 (03:46):
Please do not move. There's more with Shannon Kim coming
up next. The name of her book Answers Within You.
We are back with Shannon Kim Sha n A in
k y M. One of the focuses that you have
is is speaking the truth about being an addict without
(04:07):
sounding like the typical addict. And and so when when
you talk about what you just did, it's it's everything
just goes together like a puzzle with you.
Speaker 2 (04:19):
Yeah, you know what, I'm gonna be honest with you, Erro.
I have done so much work on myself. Yes, And
the biggest, the biggest shift that happened with me was
was when I took accountability. And once I took accountability
for everything that took place in my life, that was
(04:40):
when things totally changed for me. Because you do get
to an age in your life where you got to
start taking responsibility. You can no longer act like the
victimy And that was a big That was a big
thing for me, was when I no longer acted like
a victim, and once I could see everything in my life,
(05:01):
you know, right from a childhood right up until like
even to this day. I look back at my life
and I talk about this one particular in my chapter
thanks you for doing me wrong? Yeah, And I look
at every scenario, every situation, every person that wronged me
(05:23):
or whatever they were put in my life for a
particular reason. They were there to teach me a lesson.
And I could either take that lesson and acknowledge that
lesson and move forward, or I could play victim. Well
with me, I'm not a victim. I am moving forward
(05:43):
in any of those situations that I learned from. I
grew but not only from that, you know, I actually
teach these things to other people, because that is so important.
People are in your life for two reasons. This is
how I look at it. I simplify it very simple.
Two people there, if they're in your life for two reasons.
One for me to really pay attention to what they're
(06:06):
teaching me, and also for them to be really paying
attention to what they're learning from me. It's very simple.
It's really simple if you really look at it. Anybody
that is listening to this today, as you go throughout
your day, really become aware and pay attention of that
(06:29):
other person that you're interacting with. And I'm talking about
whether it's a ten second interaction or if it's like
a twenty minute interaction, there is something that was brought
in that person to teach you. Whether you're just walking
down the street arrow and you're noticing something in somebody
else as you're walking by, in that person that you're
(06:51):
looking at, what is it that you're noticing? Are you
noticing that they're overweight? Well? Why are you noticing that?
Because that's the reflection of truly what's happening with you? Yes? Right, yeah,
so you're look at you're noticing that that person is overweight.
Oh okay, so what is it about that that's really
bothering you? Is it because you are looking at yourself
and thinking that you are overweight? Bingo? Do you know
(07:14):
what I mean? It's just I got the shivers right
now thinking about it, because most people don't think like
I think.
Speaker 1 (07:21):
Do you think that's a trip through empathy in the
way that when when you sit there and you go,
why would you feel this way if they triggered it?
I mean, it's almost like you're putting yourself in their
shoes to better understand by way of empathy.
Speaker 2 (07:36):
Absolutely, absolutely, because I really feel that there's love and grace,
patience in every single one of us. And once you
become aware that that's exactly what it is, and you
can have love and compassion to yourself because that's what
most of us lack. That's what most of us lack
and other than compassion for ourselves. And that's why I
(08:00):
want to stress to every single person out there that
you need to start sitting in your stillness, those silent
moments that you have with yourself. That's where you're going
to find the love, patience, empathy, grace, all of that
is within yourself. That's where you find out where you
truly love yourself. So I explain all of this in
(08:21):
my book and it is an absolutely wonderful and amazing thing.
And now I'm at the point in my life where
I love. I love being with myself. I love being
in my silence. I love being because whenever I've got
a problem errow, I know that's what I need to
stick with myself because all my answers are within anything
(08:43):
that's happening on the outside world. I've literally created. I've
created myself, whether it be doubt or jealousy, whatever it
can be. I created that So when I stick in
my stillness with myself and my office or in my
chair in my life room or whatever it is, I
ask myself the question, why, Shannon, is this happening?
Speaker 1 (09:05):
Yeah?
Speaker 2 (09:06):
And I'll get the answer, and that's what I have
to change within me.
Speaker 1 (09:11):
Don't you think that's because you also put a lot
of focus on the difference between recovery and healing, Because
if you're starting to ask yourself questions, it's like, it's like,
I want to heal, but I also want to recover.
But there is a difference in this, and you know
there's a very fine line there.
Speaker 2 (09:27):
Yes, yes, I see. I look at myself too as
absolutely I wanted to heal, there's no question, but I
look at healing and addiction something and on totally. Like
you said, there there's a difference there. To say, for example,
if if I don't tell people that you know, I'm
(09:49):
an alcoholic, right, that carries an identity from my past.
That's not who I am. Do I believe? Do I
believe the arrow that I'm an alcoholic? Absolutely not. That
was an identity that I carried of myself long ago.
And that's the problem, you know, I find with a
lot of these labels out there. I don't have to
(10:09):
carry that forward to the rest of my life. I
was somebody that was addicted. I am not anymore because
that's not who I am anymore. I look at myself
now as I am strong, I am successful, I am powerful,
I am an amazing individual, I am an amazing mother.
That's what you need to concentrate on now. It's those
(10:30):
people that get stuck that keep on thinking that they
are an alcoholic or a drug addict or whatever, and
they keep on labeling themselves that's for the rest of
their life. You will never ever stare me say want no.
You will hear me say the positive thing.
Speaker 1 (10:44):
Wow.
Speaker 2 (10:45):
And that's why I truly believe that. You know, people
relapse over and over and over again because they aren't
taught to tools to go forward in the future. You
know that, Like I said, that was my past. These individuals,
that's your past. That's not who you are. You are
not that you are whoever you decide you want to
(11:06):
whoever you decide to be. So that's where you create
that new identity of what you choose to be for
the rest of your life.
Speaker 1 (11:16):
Where can people go to find out more about you?
Miss Shannon Kim because I mean they need to know
your journey and how committed to the community you really are.
Speaker 2 (11:26):
They can follow me on Instagram, Facebook, Shannon Kim. They
can contact me at Shannonkim dot com, my website, or
they can also go onto my LinkedIn which is also
Shannon Kim.
Speaker 1 (11:39):
It's Shannon as a sah A n N A in.
So make sure that you know that they know that
A is in there and not a O.
Speaker 2 (11:47):
Yes. And also Kim is k y M, it's not
k I am so yeah, I'm not spelter to the
traditional way at all because I'm not a traditional person,
you know what I mean.
Speaker 1 (11:59):
Yeah, I love well, please come back to this show
anytime in the future because the door is always going
to be open for you.
Speaker 2 (12:09):
Oh, thank you so much, Erro, and I just want
to stay. You know, I have a wonderful day, and
thank you so much for having me on you know,
your show. I deeply appreciate it.
Speaker 1 (12:18):
Will you be brilliant?
Speaker 2 (12:20):
Okay you as well.
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