Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:10):
Hey, everyone, welcome to author Nation. Today we're talking about writing, creativity,
and healing. I'm Melody Anne, and I'm your host, and
I'm here to show you how to both write successfully
and positively impact the world. And if you're interested in
a bunch of treasure as an author, you can go
visit author nation dot online and get your favorite resources
(00:37):
to help you be a successful writer. All right, So,
whether you are driving to work, or sipping your morning coffee,
or maybe snuggle up in bed ready to go to sleep,
let me introduce our guest, Don Christy Part of Me.
Don Christine is an author, certified Intuitive life coach and
(00:57):
health coach dedicated to mental health, trauma, recovery and empowerment.
Drawing from her own journey and professional expertise, she offers
compassionate guidance to those seeking healing. Her debut book, A
New Dawn Rising, Overcoming Generational Trauma and Reclaiming My Life
(01:18):
has resonated deeply with readers. Don's work has been featured
in Medium magazine, Icyhealth dot com, zent and Entrepreneur magazine,
where she shares insights on mental health and wellness. Through
her writing and coaching, she empowers individuals to reclaim their stories,
heal and embrace a purposeful, joyful life. Don Christine, Welcome
(01:43):
to Author Nation Interviews.
Speaker 2 (01:45):
Thank you so much, Melodie. It's so great to be here.
Speaker 1 (01:48):
I'm super excited about your book and I want to
start there. So can you tell us a little bit
about a new dawn rising? And by the way, I
really like the play there, don don don.
Speaker 2 (01:59):
He thank you, thank you. You know, I really.
Speaker 3 (02:03):
Wanted it started out to be honest, me just writing
my feelings down. I never thought that this was going
to turn into a book. And as time went on,
my guides, my spirit GUIDs, I kept hearing, you need,
you need to write the book.
Speaker 2 (02:18):
You need, you need to turn this into a book.
You need to write.
Speaker 3 (02:20):
People need to hear your words. They're powerful. There's so
many people going through this, and that was the catalyst
to start it. I started putting all the pieces together.
I knew, I felt deep that this book could resonate
with so many people.
Speaker 2 (02:34):
And I had to be brave and go deep.
Speaker 3 (02:36):
And I knew that the words on the pages would
resonate with people. I knew that I wasn't the only
one going through these things, and I felt that it
was important to get that message out to the world
and let other things that they weren't alone.
Speaker 1 (02:50):
Yeah, and I love that you say that you've just
started by writing down what you needed to write down,
because I often when people come to me and say,
I want to write a memoir, and I often say,
just start by writing your story for yourself. That's it.
And if you decide to publish, great, And if you
never decide to publish, you will go on a journey
of personal discovery and development that is more powerful than
(03:14):
anything else. And so was that your experience.
Speaker 3 (03:17):
I'll be honest, it was a bit of both, and
I'm glad you brought this up for me.
Speaker 2 (03:22):
A lot of my.
Speaker 3 (03:25):
Verbiage came out at night when I was in bed,
so I downloaded a recorder app and I would record
myself because I would find that when I write, I
couldn't think, and when I had, when I was at night,
meditating getting ready for bed, then all of a sudden,
all the thoughts came in, and I knew that that's
(03:45):
when I was creative.
Speaker 2 (03:47):
So I laid in bed with my phone on a.
Speaker 3 (03:50):
Tape recorder and I just recorded myself talking about it.
And it would transcribe, and then I would take that
transcription and then it would help me have ideas on
paper and then I can write from there.
Speaker 2 (04:01):
So I did it both ways. I did it however
uniquely possible.
Speaker 3 (04:08):
I could think of doing it because there were times
where I had writer's block and I would put that
pressure on myself and I thought, well, if I had
a notepad, I could jot things down, and then if
it wasn't that way, I would have my tape recorder
on me because my phone was on me at all times,
and that was another way.
Speaker 2 (04:23):
It helped me get what I needed to.
Speaker 3 (04:25):
Get out, and that was a good catalyst also to
help me write the book.
Speaker 1 (04:30):
And I love that you've said that because a lot
of people tell me I'd like, you know, I've thought
about writing a book, but I'm not a writer, and
you can speak, and therefore you can write a book.
So you know, you found the time when you were
at your most creative or when the thoughts were really
coming at you, and you got them out in the
way that best suited you at the moment. I just
(04:50):
want to reiterate that for the audience, this this is
really important. It's there are no rules in this game, right,
you know, say what you need to say, when you
need to say it, and the way you need to
say it, and if that means recording it, that's a
wonderful thing. So how did owning your story transform your
(05:11):
writing and your healing journey?
Speaker 2 (05:15):
It was the catalyst help me release. It was healing.
It was a very healing experience for me.
Speaker 3 (05:22):
But it was also empowering for me to know that
my words matter, that every word, everyone's words matter, Everyone
does matter, and a lot of us don't feel heard.
And I think what stops a lot of us from
expressing ourselves is that fear that no one wants to listen.
Speaker 2 (05:40):
But you don't know how your story can inspire others.
Speaker 3 (05:43):
You don't know that your words have power and that
they can be the catalyst and someone else's healing journey.
Speaker 2 (05:49):
So if you.
Speaker 3 (05:50):
Have that fear, just know that pushing through that fear
is not only helping your growth, but it's also the
catalyst for helping someone else as growth.
Speaker 2 (06:00):
However, you have to share your message with the world.
Speaker 1 (06:03):
Yeah, then let's dig into that a little bit specifically
with you know you're healing, and you're not just healing
from something that may have happened in your life, but
you're dealing with intergenerational trauma, and that's something you work
through for yourself in your book with your clients, and
so you know, if you are writing your story and
(06:26):
your stuff starts coming up, generational trauma starts coming up.
First off, define it for us, and then can you
talk about how to recognize it and what to do
when it shows up.
Speaker 3 (06:39):
Absolutely, and it could look different for everyone, to be honest,
it could be verbal, it could be mental, it could
be physical, it could be everything.
Speaker 2 (06:48):
It could be a combination.
Speaker 3 (06:49):
So everybody's journey looks different. I want to make sure
that it is not cookie cutter.
Speaker 2 (06:54):
It could be anything.
Speaker 3 (06:56):
Use it could be alcoholism, it could be narcotics, it
could be anything.
Speaker 2 (07:03):
The best way that.
Speaker 3 (07:04):
I learned from my background and my own studies is
a pattern that goes back generations. So I know for
me personally, I looked at how my grandmother treated my mother,
and those same characteristics of the belittling, the gas lighting,
(07:25):
the dismissing my mother did my grandmother did that my mother.
Speaker 2 (07:30):
My mother did the same thing to me.
Speaker 3 (07:32):
You don't recognize it when you're little, you don't it
when you come into your adulthood and if you actually see, okay,
you know why, because I think everyone starts out like
why am I being treated this way?
Speaker 2 (07:44):
Like why?
Speaker 3 (07:45):
Why is this happening? Because you go into that mode
of like why me, Why am I? Why do I
feel like I'm being attacked? And when you push everything aside,
and I started to look at the behavior of why,
you know, why was my mother acting like this? Why
would just my grandmother treating my mom like this? I
started seeing a pattern, and I'm sure if I went
(08:08):
back even further and looked into my grandmother's history with
my great gram, I'm sure there was something there too.
Speaker 2 (08:16):
So I started noticing.
Speaker 3 (08:18):
Behavior of how my grandmother used to treat my mother,
and I would observe it as a little girl, and
I saw the same patterns that my mother was treating
me with, and that was the catalyst, and I started
to understand, wow, okay.
Speaker 2 (08:33):
This it's not excusing me the behavior, but.
Speaker 3 (08:36):
It helped me understand why. It helped me understand that
she was only going off of how she was brought up,
and she didn't implement the tools that she needed, or
she didn't have the resources she needed to heal and
it is a choice, it really is.
Speaker 1 (08:53):
Yeah. So interdational intergenerational trauma, we might consider it patterns
of behavior passed on through generations that are harmful.
Speaker 3 (09:03):
Absolutely, and it could be genetically too. Genetically, so if
your child is if you're the mother and you're caring,
and you're you're in fight flight freeze mode, and now
your cortisol levels are up. Now the baby is genetically
inheriting that, and now the baby might be born and
might be in a hypertensive state. So there's so many
(09:24):
factors in this that now scientists are coming to the
light of these people. You know, professionals are talking about it.
You hear psychologists talking about it, and science is talking
about our genetics, our genes, what's passed on from the
mother to the baby.
Speaker 2 (09:39):
So there's so many factors involved in it.
Speaker 1 (09:43):
Yeah. And so now I'm writing my memoir, right, I've decided,
you know, whether I'm publishing or I'm writing my memoir.
And as I'm doing so, there are some kind of
hints of intergenerational trauma. But I, you know, maybe like you,
maybe I have information, maybe I don't. How can I
(10:04):
you know, how can I write about it? How can
I deal with it through writing to support my healing
and my growth.
Speaker 3 (10:13):
Coming from a place of empowerment, not in victimhood.
Speaker 2 (10:16):
I think that is a huge difference.
Speaker 3 (10:19):
When you're writing for me, it's a it's a it's
a form of empowerment. You're putting your thoughts, your emotions,
your feelings to paper, to computer, however you choose to write, right,
it has to come from a place of empowerment because
you are the catalyst of your own healing. You are
taking the ropes of your life and you're saying, Okay.
Speaker 2 (10:43):
This hurt, this deeply hurt.
Speaker 3 (10:46):
I had to unlearn everything I ever thought was true
and rebuild my belief system all over again. And it
was hard, and it's still hard. But I'm coming from
a place of empowerment. I'm not coming from a place
of victimhood anymore. I'm here to help the next generation
people out there struggling with the same things.
Speaker 2 (11:05):
And I think if you come.
Speaker 3 (11:07):
From a place from that, you're not You're not You're
not in this woe is Me stage when you're writing,
when you're trying to help others see the value in themselves.
Speaker 1 (11:16):
Yeah, yeah, And when writing like this, we need to
be authentic and vulnerable, don't we Yes, we do.
Speaker 2 (11:26):
That's a hard part, right, Oh, it's I mean, I don't.
I don't think I'll be honest.
Speaker 3 (11:32):
I don't think I've ever been this vulnerable in my
life as far as what I put in my I.
Speaker 2 (11:36):
Mean my book.
Speaker 3 (11:38):
I went to some really deep places in my soul
to write this, and it had to be that way
because it couldn't be.
Speaker 2 (11:46):
Half done. It had to come from a place of truth.
Speaker 3 (11:50):
It had to come a place of rawness and exposing
my own vulnerabilities of times where I don't feel enough
or you know, times where I was belittled and what
that did to me, where that took my life down
and downward spiral like, I had to be authentic with
this because we're human.
Speaker 2 (12:06):
We're not perfect.
Speaker 1 (12:09):
Exactly, And so I want to kind of tie empowerment
and vulnerability and all authenticity together in just a moment.
But before I do, I just want to say that
for the audience listening, you can be authentic and vulnerable
with yourself and write something for yourself, but not publish it.
So I just I want to reiterate this because so
(12:31):
many people think, well I wrote it, I have to
publish it. It's like, no, you don't. You do not
have to publish it. You can go through this journey
and be authentic and vulnerable and self empowering without having
to share your story in an unsafe place, including in
a book. If that's not right for you, Okay, I
want to talk about So I'm writing my story, I'm
(12:53):
digging down, I'm being as authentic and as vulnerable as
I can be, and I'm I'm trying to empower myself
and I'm realizing there are things I also need to
take responsibility for.
Speaker 2 (13:08):
Yep.
Speaker 1 (13:10):
And yet I'm also a victim if I've had trauma
inflicted on me. Can you can you kind of work
through this a little bit with us?
Speaker 2 (13:19):
Sure?
Speaker 3 (13:20):
I Mean when we first start out, we're all victims
because we don't we don't understand what happened to us.
I think once we understand what happens to us, we
take that victimhood and we can shift it to empowerment
because it's like it's like, oh, it's like, okay, I
dropped the cup of coffee.
Speaker 2 (13:38):
What are you going to do about it? Do you
stand there and.
Speaker 3 (13:40):
Look at the spill and go, oh, my gosh, I
lost my cup of coffee? Or do you clean up
the mess and pour yourself a new cop Yeah? Right,
So it's it's taking charge of your own life.
Speaker 2 (13:50):
You can choose.
Speaker 3 (13:51):
I think everything in life is a choice. You can
choose to stay in that victimhood mentality, or you can
make a choice to say, Okay, I know that all
of this happened. I don't agree with it, but I
have the power to transform it. And I can choose
to stay in this victimhood mode, or I can choose
to empower myself and learn everything of why.
Speaker 2 (14:15):
And that's what I did. I was in victimhood mode.
Speaker 3 (14:18):
I can't sit here and claim that I wasn't a victim.
Of course I was. And it took me a long
time to empower myself to understand that I'm not a
victim anymore, that what happened in my life was validated,
that yes, this is my truth. And once I learned that,
once I had that foundation, then the.
Speaker 2 (14:38):
Rest was up to me. What do I do about it?
Speaker 3 (14:40):
Do I stay in that mode or do I transform
that and turn it into empowerment and help others in
their healing journey?
Speaker 1 (14:49):
Yeah? I love that now. There's been a lot of
studies done about how powerful writing is in healing, and
yet there is also still a group of people who
I know when you know when they when they bring
up their trauma, whether talking about it or writing about it,
any form of reliving trauma is not helpful. And so
(15:14):
I want to ask you when you were exploring you
were you know, exploring deep right? This was very personal
and vulnerable. How did you maintain your mental health?
Speaker 2 (15:24):
Honestly?
Speaker 3 (15:25):
I had to literally meditate, and I still do. I
meditate every day. I have to have a self care practice.
I wake up at a certain time, I do my tasks,
I coach. I have a pretty just chronological order of
my schedule to keep me grounded.
Speaker 2 (15:42):
I think that is so important, and I'll be honest
with you.
Speaker 3 (15:45):
When I was even writing the book, and when the
book was pretty much done, I was in the editing process.
Speaker 2 (15:50):
I was going through everything because like I said.
Speaker 3 (15:53):
I had I would record certain things and I had.
Speaker 2 (15:57):
To literally put everything together because there was pieces everywhere
of the book. So this was a complete journey.
Speaker 3 (16:03):
And when I read everything back, there were parts that
I was like, whoa like I felt that, and I
would cry.
Speaker 2 (16:11):
And I would feel it too, and you would.
Speaker 3 (16:14):
I would still go through this bitter sweetness of it.
Speaker 2 (16:18):
So I can't sit here and say that it didn't
even affect me. Then it was. It was in different
state though it was this Wow, I used to be
that person.
Speaker 3 (16:29):
So as I was reading it, looking back, it was
I was coming from a different place from when I
was starting to write it. Now it's completed, I've come
further in my healing journey.
Speaker 2 (16:42):
I was able to read it and just implement that
in my life. And then it almost felt like a release.
Speaker 3 (16:49):
Like once I got to that last page, I was like, wow,
like this is pat.
Speaker 2 (16:54):
Like you kind of get impressed, Like I was like whoa,
like this I did this, like this was this was
this is.
Speaker 3 (17:00):
Beautiful, And it just made me even more passionate, like
I got to get this book out here because I
know this can help people. And you kind of get
shocked of your own work of realizing, like when you
come from a place of that deep place, how powerful
your writing really is. It was a different form of
writing for me completely. Yeah.
Speaker 1 (17:21):
Yeah, And I wish that response to finishing writing your
book to all authors out there. By the way, that
feeling of Wow, this is beautiful. I hope everyone feels
that way. So we were talking about empowerment. What strategies
have you found for writing to be effective for turning
that personal trauma, that victimhood into a narrative of empowerment.
Speaker 3 (17:46):
Remember why you're doing this, Remember why you wanted to
heal in the first place.
Speaker 2 (17:51):
It always went back to my why. And I don't know.
Speaker 3 (17:53):
If that's the coaching part of me, but for me,
that helped me stay grounded into why I'm writing it.
It's not only for my own healing journey. It's not
only to help others heal. I did it for my kids.
I did it for my family lineage. I did it
to help generational healing in my lineage.
Speaker 2 (18:12):
Which I hope it does.
Speaker 3 (18:14):
So it's all these different factors that helped me understand
that if I feel an emotion that doesn't sit right,
because we're human, we're going to feel those what if moments,
is to go back to center breathe Breathing techniques are
huge for me. So it's in for four, hold out
for four. I do that when I meditate, just to
(18:36):
ground yourself, cent yourself, and to know that if you're
not feeling like if you thought you felt like writing
and then all of a sudden you're just not in
that space.
Speaker 2 (18:45):
It's okay to walk away and give yourself that grace.
Speaker 1 (18:48):
Yeah, yeah, absolutely, yes. And it's funny you say that
because there, you know, there are people who say, you know,
if you're writing a book, you know you have consistency
and whatnot. This is all very imps important and I
agree with that. And if you're dealing with some very
deep personal trauma, I think you need to rethink the
idea of forcing yourself to write when when it's overwhelming
(19:12):
and too much, right, Absolutely, I just want to show
those differences so people listening are like, yeah, you know,
there are times when we sit down or we do
things whether we want to or not, and there are
other times when self care is so much more important
than getting words on a page.
Speaker 3 (19:29):
Absolutely, And for me, it wasn't about okay, I have a.
Speaker 2 (19:34):
Time limit on this. You know. I started writing this
book three years ago.
Speaker 3 (19:38):
This was not an overnight project, and then after that.
Speaker 2 (19:43):
I sat on it for a year.
Speaker 3 (19:46):
I did, it was written, it wasn't the final edit.
Speaker 2 (19:51):
It was like the second to final edit, and I
sat on.
Speaker 3 (19:53):
It for a year because I was like, who wants
to hear this?
Speaker 2 (19:58):
Is anyone? Like here?
Speaker 3 (20:00):
H And I saw it and then I kept hearing, No,
you need to publish it. You you publish it, and you
publish it. Your words matter.
Speaker 2 (20:06):
You need to publish. Okay, okay, okay, I'll do it.
I'll do it. I'll do it. You just got to
you just gotta do it.
Speaker 1 (20:13):
Yeah, that's exactly all right. I would love for you
to give us like the one minute or the thirty
second summary of a new Dawn rising.
Speaker 2 (20:22):
Oh gosh.
Speaker 3 (20:25):
So for me, it's from my childhood all the way
up until I'd say about a year ago.
Speaker 2 (20:31):
In my life. It starts out in my childhood.
Speaker 3 (20:33):
I bring you through my childhood, how I grew up
my relationships not only with my family, but with others
in my life because there was a pattern there of
toxic love. I take you through what I did to
empower myself on my own healing journey. I did this
all on my own, and I had to build my
(20:54):
healing team.
Speaker 2 (20:55):
So I go through that.
Speaker 3 (20:56):
I talk about how I built my healing team, the
strategies I used to heal, and just real raw vulnerable
things of what happened to me and how I chose
to empower myself and understand that healing is not an
overnight thing.
Speaker 2 (21:15):
I didn't get this way in my forty years. It's
going to take some time to heal, and just go
with the flow.
Speaker 3 (21:21):
Just every day, keep yourself as grounded as you possibly can,
understand your emotions, understand your feelings, and just allow yourself
to be and go through the healing process.
Speaker 1 (21:35):
Yeah. One thing I love about memoirs is that it
doesn't tell us what to do. It shows us a
path that somebody else took that we could take or
take things from to help us in our own path.
That's something I love about memoirs. So you can find
Don's book on Amazon. I will drop the link in
(21:57):
the show notes for you so that you can that
and read that and have another path to look at
as you are, as you are forging your own path
through your own life. All right down. You know, people
have been listening to us talking about intergenerational trauma, writing
about trauma and being, you know, finding our narrative, empowering ourselves,
(22:23):
taking responsibility, yet still understanding at one point we wear victims.
All of this stuff we've been talking about and what
I love to do is I like to say, you know,
we've come near to the end and people are now going, okay,
I want in What do I do now? What can
people do right now? Maybe three things that people can
(22:44):
do to help them kind of get started or get
over a bump, maybe take you know, look at intergenerational trauma.
What would be your three things?
Speaker 3 (22:55):
Honestly, Number one is making the choice to heal. That's
it's it's work, it's and it's not easy work. And
I think a lot of people want some overnight fix
and that's just not the case with this.
Speaker 2 (23:08):
I'll be perfectly raw and honest about it.
Speaker 3 (23:10):
So it's making the commitment to heal and then doing
some research find you know, and you could have for
me especially, I had a psychiatry or a psychologist. I
had a coach, I had podcasts and books. I just
combined everything. So do what works for you. Find support
through healthy family and friends that actually have your back,
(23:34):
that are willing that you can be vulnerable with. Finding
people that can help you, and that looks like that
is different for everybody.
Speaker 1 (23:44):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (23:46):
Number two, have honestly, diet and exercise whatever that looks
like for you.
Speaker 2 (23:51):
That was a catalyst in my healing journey too.
Speaker 3 (23:53):
Because I'll be honest, I ate my emotions for a
long time and it did not serve me.
Speaker 2 (23:58):
And that again being I'm honest and real, because I
am human. I ate my emotions for years and it
did not serve me. It caused a lot of weakness.
It caused a lot of just fucky feelings.
Speaker 3 (24:09):
So just getting into a healthy diet, any kind of movement,
whether that's walking, whatever kind of exercise that you choose to.
Speaker 2 (24:18):
Do, sunlight.
Speaker 3 (24:20):
Sunlight's huge, Go outside, be in nature, get some fresh air.
That will do wonders. It does wonders for me. I
do it every day. I walk the track here where
I live every single day, even in the snow. I've
done it in the snow too, just to keep me grounded.
And three have fun with it. Explore what are you
interested in? What other tools in your toolbox can you add?
(24:43):
Is it enjoying a craft. Is it implementing something that
you can creatively express yourself through art?
Speaker 2 (24:51):
That is such a healing element for me.
Speaker 3 (24:54):
To expressing yourself through other modalities, whether it's music, art,
your favorite local social group, by the.
Speaker 2 (25:01):
Way, to build community, would be my herd.
Speaker 1 (25:05):
So number one, choose to heal, create your healing team right,
put together a heal team. Number two self care right
whatever that means for you. And number three joy like,
have fun, enjoy the process. Don't take it so seriously
that you can't play as you journey through this. Thank
you Don so much for those three. I think they're
(25:27):
wonderful pieces of advice. If somebody is listening right now
and says I have to talk to Don, how do
they get in touch with you?
Speaker 2 (25:34):
I am so simple. I am old school.
Speaker 3 (25:36):
You guys can literally find me on social media. I'm
on Facebook, I'm on Instagram, I'm on LinkedIn, I'm on
all of them. And Don Christine at gmail dot com
and Don is with an e reach out send me
an email. I'm old school, I coach. I want to
get to know you. I want to get to know
how I can help you.
Speaker 2 (25:57):
Just send me an email.
Speaker 3 (25:58):
I will get back to you, which it is me
personally responding.
Speaker 1 (26:01):
I promise you that perfect and for everyone. I'm going
to put that email in the show notes so that
you can email down and work with her or connect
with her, tell her how much you loved the book
or whatever it is that you want to say. All right,
don thank you so much for joining us on Authoration today.
(26:22):
I've really enjoyed our conversation.
Speaker 3 (26:24):
Melodie was such an honor. Thank you so much for
having me on your show.
Speaker 2 (26:28):
I really appreciate it absolutely.
Speaker 1 (26:30):
And to everyone out there, thank you for joining us
on Authornation today. I hope this conversation has provided you
with some valuable insights and some inspiration to really dig
into your own story and you know, figure out how
to move forward in life in a way that is
joyful and healing and empowering. And don't forget to visit
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authoration dot online for your resources to help you become
a successful author. And of course I always appreciate your
feedback and your support. Thank you so much to everyone
who has, you know, reviewed or made comments. I really
enjoy that. I love reading them. And if you've enjoyed
this episode, send it to a friend, send it to
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someone you know someone who needs this, so send it
off to them so your fellow author can benefit. Because
your participation helps us continue delivering the insights and the
tools you need to succeed. So keep writing, keep creating,
and continue to share your unique stories with the world,