Dan McGrew an episode of Avalon Time radio show

Please enjoy Dan McGrew a great episode of the legendaryAvalon Time radio show - A Classic Old Time radio Show - OTR

Episode Transcript

(00:09):
A pack of Avalons cigarettes. Please, yes, sirs, oh guess the
moment, sirs, don't forget thechange. You'd never guess, but Avalons
cost you less. Always good evening, Friends, good evening. This is

(00:36):
del King saying welcome to Avalon timewith Kirk Matthew Hadna stillwell, Jeanette,
the Avalon cost Bob Strong and hisOrchestra and Red Skelton the Orchestral is the
program with the ladies in love withyou, ladies and gentlemen, If you'll

(01:22):
just write up an Avalon cigarette,you'll understand why millions upon millions of smokers
are switching to them. You see, Avalons are entirely new, different from
all others. And the reason they'redifferent they're quality cigarettes that sell or less
three to five cents less than otherpopular price brands, and that repeated,

(01:42):
saving a three to five cents onevery pack. We'll let you many extra
dollars in a very short time.But without knowing, you'd never guess they
cost you less. Avalons are Unionmade from the very finest Turkish in domestic
tobaccos. In fact, you couldn'tget finer quality tobacco in any other cigarettes,
regardless of price regardless of brand.Without question, Avalons are the cigarette

(02:07):
buyer today. Why not try apack the next time? And now he

(02:38):
presents the only man in radio whosename appears on the first page of Poo's
through red shelter. Thank you verymuch. Good evening, ladies and jessmen.
I feel great tonight. Say wehad a lot of fun at the
circus. He's right, Say thankso old girl friend of night out here.

(03:00):
The bearded lady, okay, Ibought her some flowers, and I
bought her some candy and some razorblade red. Did you ever kiss a
bearded lady? Now that's a prettyticky situation. H So I started to
kiss at this afternoon, I sawsomebody coming, so I didn't kiss on
the right cheek. I walked aroundto the left cheek and want plaited a

(03:21):
minute. Why didn't just stop beatingaround the foot? Well, you know,
the posts and the circuits didn't thinkthey were going to get the ten
up in time this season. Oneof the elephants ate the coffee pot and
they couldn't find the ground. Ihad a lot of fun at the circus.
So I saw a double hitter.The Simese twins going into the big

(03:46):
top. I stopped bought some pinklemonade. You know what pink lemonade is.
That's the sum of me. Youcan technicolor. I saw the swords
falling, and after he's swallowing aboutten night date swords and a hack saw
a play in front of me,leaning down here a little boy and said,
and you gripe about cast oil.The strong man was writing a letter.
Ob this was funny. The strongman was writing a letter and he

(04:08):
made a mistake, so he useda rubber faced man for an erasers.
What was it good either us?The conjoytionness was a friend of mine.
He was complaining about his salary,and so death the embarrassed were born.
And he got out in front ofthe tent and sat on his own hat.
One way of making both ends meet. Oh, I saw dizzey Dan.

(04:33):
You've been reading this, lady.I saw Dizney Dan out there.
He saw this Indian faker laying onone of those beds of nails, and
he says, now there has beena perfect excuse. Oh that's enough clowning
around. So Janet at this timewas things. My heart has wings,

(04:55):
sing it, pretty girl, butwith my hat has we I blad you,

(05:21):
tender you and flee srender I cleanmy hard has with your cold,
I feel just cricle robbin thin spray, I dim and dream of you not

(05:55):
it drilling well you hold me?Oh my glad motty, I'm flying time
in heaven. Me calls nice?What we my glad lot, I'm flying

(06:43):
tigh in heaven be called. Thatwas your next singing. My heart has

(07:03):
wings and very pretty too. Sayyou've read what do you do about your
summer hotel in the mountains? Youknow? Gallet toupe on the bald eagle
nomine. I let my uncle takeit back, but he gave me a
job as a social director. Hedid. Yeah, and would you believe
it? Since I took the jobover as social director. The guests I'm
speaking to each other, they areso say, I'm having a lot of

(07:26):
fun if I got Tom playing allkinds of games. The only game they
don't seem to get is bingo,and they're too old to learn it.
I can't see that age has anythingto do with it. Well, it
has. Every time I yell outthe number sixty five, they all held
social secuity. Oh but I gota real tree for him. Tonight,
I gotta get back up there.We're gonna put on a play for them

(07:46):
in the barn. Boy, Yeah, that's gonna be a turkey in the
straw. It's Roger the fiddle playeragain. Little kid yourself, It's gonna
be terrific. We're gonna put ondanger Stam mcgruve. I played part of
Dan McGrew, a part was madefamous by my uncle when he was with
a road company. You know hebroke records for attendance. You mean he
broke rocks and alcoh Ah, QuietRogers. I'm playing the park because I'm

(08:11):
a pretty dangerous guy. Yeah,you're in cats from memphto listen. I'm
plenty dangerous, brother, And don'tkid yourself that I'm not. Why only
yesterday morning I went up in themountains to hunt bears with only a revolver
in my hand. I hear anoise, I wheeled around a fire a
shop, and they'll lay a deadbear. Hong. Do you figure he's

(08:31):
been dead for two weeks? Oh, what you're doing? Least get up
in the mountains so we can puton the plane. Say you read that.
Maybe I'll spend the week up there, I suppose you feature an excellent
cuisine. No, but the food'sgood, and does that air up to
make your hungry? You come downfor breakage and you feel like eating no

(08:52):
horse, and after you've tasted thefood you wish you had, Well,
haul's your appetite? Red do allright? He does? All right?
Why every time he's just down inthe dining room. The Waisses have a
game they played calls black and Blacken. He's got the Blackens. There,
go on, Bobs, let's havethe South American way while we start north.

(10:07):
You look as here we are friendsthat the summer Hotel galais Doulas,

(11:46):
where Red Skelton is acting as asa social director. And here's a great
man. Now, greetings everybody.I'm glad to see so many of you
gether here in the screwball room.Now from first play the shooting of Dan
McGrew. I'm need to played thepart of Dan McGrew, and of course
I get shot in the inn.Okay, well you ain't a scene Our

(12:09):
lady with a low dogs who robberdoubled sermost represent the shooting of Dan McGrew,
or you can take it with youcurtain. A bunch of the boys
were whooping it up in the ballamutesaloon, and the kid that handles the

(12:33):
music box was dragging a jag timetune. Oh shirts, done it again?
Don it again? Funny how musicinspires me to do things by the
roulette wheels so that you can't healthe dangerous Dan McGrew and just behind him

(12:54):
are watching his luck. Was alady that knows as new, say McGrew,
ain't again, lord is ungained Acamp certainly is my little trillions.
But the players don't have a chancearound here. Look the ball stopped on
a winner. What a coincidence?Did the same thing last year too?

(13:15):
Looks like you win, Pardner.Come on the drinks around the house,
say Lou. Tell the bartended toget off that recipe for that double rich
Mickey Finn. Nothing done that mayminor may not be a sour dough to
you, but he's my week cookie. Oh we cookie, well, do
not forget. Don't have forgets itaround me, bark. I'm known as

(13:37):
the best show. Fact, I'mthe best win half Shaw, Say lou
A, watch you and me havea nuts gas ram. You're not the
guy I won you couldn't have anygoal with a pan like yours. Oh
give me the brush off. That'sturning me down. What is this?

(13:58):
That's a notch? Come on,you're gonna dance with be or else?
Bade lepp aside, my little woodspoon. Looks like you're going to have
to elk thought a fool guard.You're getting a place all cluttered up with
victims that two of them. Can'tyou do a thing, bottle, So

(14:18):
I'll have to wait till the springfall to do my planting. We said
it was there. It looks likea money just came in too late to
move the everything. Hey, mystarlet coated bread or you a mounted policeman?
Well, I ain't a motor icekickle cop. I am hend Row

(14:41):
of the mountain, and you looklike a good egg him fruit depone has
something on the house. Careful youdon't cripple with those corpous select cars.
Oh good heaven, Sam, misssimmer grow, you'll just half us up
to your urge to parent. There'snothing of it, my red coated friend.

(15:03):
There's something with the face on theballroom floor. But there's two of
them, my goodness sake, don'ttell me you've gone in for double features,
mister McGraw, you'll just have torub them out. That's a little
murder of already taking care of well. I really ought to ask you a
lot of questions, but I justtake the prime too. Other people's says,

(15:24):
Oh listen, we'll learn my friendshave a double friend, will you?
Oh? No thanks. I neverdrink anything stronger than a double chin,
double chin, double chin. Don'tbelieve a never heard of a drink
cold double chin. Well, that'sthe fat horse's next. But I won't

(15:45):
take anything to say. I'm inthe dog team division of the monster that
I'm working night chips, and bythe time I go off duty at half
past April or a quarter to May, I just know I'm gonna have Arctic
circles under my eyes. Well what'sthat? Oh, good Heaven, that's
my dog team. Well I gottago now, I gotta bleed my hopeys,

(16:07):
some wheedies and mush or gul money. He look good in my prophy
room. I've always wanted a moanedpoliceman, but it takes that love.
Good evening, missus mcgool's booze.What can I do for you? What

(16:30):
you want? To buy a biggold plane. Well, we have none
for sale right now. But Itell you we don't have any gold mines
for sale. Yes, yes,yes, we have no bonanzas, say
Louis. I just got bright slicesin front of my eyes. Bright flashes

(16:51):
must be your liver. No,I think it's my more than life.
You can't get me goold desk,and you can't pee him it. Somebody's
drew them with prokendust. Well,anybody's gotta spoke a dust fights it.
I messed that up a little there, stranger fight it can Well, anybody

(17:11):
they ain't gonna let go. Imessed the can. Anybody ain't got the
dust around here? Bike? AndI got here. Well, well,
a nifty chamber death makes the holidayteam and grew. I'm bringing in another

(17:32):
poker dest And next time I comein, there's no credit here, my
friend, I'm gonna worl you withboth my fair hands. Oh, I
got your better naught either. I'lllet you bring in the cold. A
poke and of till is better thantwo in the floods. You hear that
little poking of tills. But twoin the flood it ain't finning. The
girl then out of the knife thatwas fifty below and into the tin and

(17:56):
the glare the stumble the miner freshfrom the creeks, dog dirty and float
it for bear. Well, cutoff my head, call me fordy if
it ain't changed, Sam flusom,Well for person mccrawl, you look like

(18:17):
the six Fellas of Yukon coumet roomsthe right time, cared taste in his
chips. There was no one elseon the stool, so the stranger stumbled
across the room and flopped down therelike a fool. He's a duffy me
sickmas. How else could I killit? In a buckskin shirt that was
glazed with dirts. He sat andI saw him sway, and he clutched

(18:38):
the keys with his talon hands.My gosh, that that man could lay
well, my chattering comrade, yousure do finger that piano maybe like hammy
stinct that sweet damn. We'll makeit sna weir, we'll make it.

(19:02):
No, wit ta will make it. No, That's all I know.
So he's profession. Would you careto tee off little African golf? Would
you? No? But I mightplay a game or poke it if you
like eat gals. I won't getlost in the shuffles. I always play
a street game, pardner. Ieven mark my own car. Here's a

(19:26):
fresh stagg. I just got allthe ice bar don't touch him up dealing
myself. Here you are. It'ssays five cards for you and fine for
me, pretty little things. Don'tsay only five cards. Oh I don't
sorry, I said I would feelhim. Oh look at east cards.
I bet a hundred, A raisea hundred. I bet a thousand,

(19:48):
raise your thousand. I bet amillion. I raise you a million.
I better shut up, all right, I'll call you. That's fine.
I win yet seven minutes, simand I got a royal Fuck? What
have you got? Two pairs jacksand six shooters? Why you kill a
lucky? But now it's my turnto deal, jeffleem pick shufflin thin feel

(20:11):
them carefully than I'll win peace.Yeah, better, minion, I called,
I got a king high stray beforeyou go. Oh, let's see,
I got think see jack ten ninefive? What teacher want? You
mean? You've got thirteen cars?Fright? Why come out? He's super
stick? Is the top so long? I'm taking a part. You wouldn't

(20:37):
damn that would be dishonest, mylittle chun. Are you a cute to
me? As I kind of saidthat I'm a cook it? Why this
thing a gun tot? Why thetwo cents? I say it's time,
I'll put that gun down? Put? Is that all right away? Fus

(20:59):
A life sent out guns plays inthe dark. You got me, you've
done me? In Pardners, we'remade out to teach a lesson. That's
more than a lesson, it's thewhole course, Dan, Dan, No,

(21:22):
I'm not as wise as these lawyerguys, but strictly between us few
the woman that kissed him and pinchedhis polk was a lady that's knowles loose.

(21:42):
There's a right pretty song that cameout lately friends. It's called My
Last Goodbye. Bob Friendler put itinto a very nice arrangement for Kirk Massey
in the alkaloon corner here it ismy last goodbye thing. Iturns my supported

(22:07):
you. But how we knew itwas my law stood by to you is
met with myn you live. Soit was my stood by daring born you.

(22:51):
My howdays when you say my loveof you? My thority today makes

(23:15):
thing that I said to buy toyou? It was my law to buy.

(24:11):
It was my love. Good Byeto you, Lord darling, you
are going my When you say Ilove myucility today, explain that I said

(24:55):
goodbye to you. Uh uh.Ladies and gentlemen, ask any jitter about

(25:37):
what he thinks about Avalon cigarettes andhe'll reply, I'm in ruling jammin javan
boy in that group. Yeah,man, that's Avalon. And by way
of interpretations, friends, he meansAvalons up everything, and believe me they

(26:02):
have. They give you both outstandingquality and real money saving economy. Avalons
are union made from the choicest Turkishand domestic tobaccos that grow blended to perfection
to give you the very finest inreal smoking pleasure. That's why you'd never
guess. They cost you less threeto five cents less per pack than other
popular price brands three to five centsless for cigarettes that are unsurpassed in quality.

(26:30):
With all the definite advantages avalons offer, they're certainly worth a trial.
Ladies and gentlemen, in the languageof the jitterbug, modulate to avalons,
which means switch to Avalons. Trya pack tonight. The well, now

(28:32):
there goes another thirty minutes that youcan file away in my diary. Right
alright, I'll place it under Julyon the July under anything. What's the
difference as long as you bury it. Yes, I suppose you're referring to
my player, Roger Well. Iunderstand that the critics are waiting out in
the hole and they're not going togive me four belt. You'll probably wind
up at about three scars. Oh, what's the years? Good night,

(28:56):
folks, I see you next week. Remember, friends, during the week
when you ask for avalon, don'tforget your change. Not a yes,

(29:18):
you'd never guess, but avalons costonly ten cents plus city or state tax.
Me with us next Saturday evening atthe same time when the Brown and
Williams and Tobacco Corporation will again presentavalon Time. Yell King speaking good night,

(29:44):
heard on this program or South Americaaway from great Protest Avalon Time a
something of large Chicago revealed. Andthis is the National Broadcasting flo w E

(30:06):
a F New York npe w EA F New York npe H