Lindsay Lohan served just 84 minutes in jail for seven misdemeanors including two DUIs and cocaine possession while regular Americans rot in cells for far less. Reid Carter exposes the shocking timeline of Hollywood's most famous train wreck: the Disney darling who lived in hotels as a teenager, crashed her Mercedes high on cocaine, led police on a chase down PCH, and showed up to court with "F**k U" painted on her fingernails. From 250 days in luxury rehabs to stealing a $2,500 necklace, this is part one of how fame became a get-out-of-jail-free card. Tomorrow: redemption in Dubai.
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Become a premium subscriber! (no ads and no feed drops). For Apple users, hit the banner on your Apple podcasts app which says UNINTERRUPTED LISTENING. You also get 25+ other series from comedy to paranormal, royals, romance, trivia, politics, movies, music, murder, sports, travel, religion, spirituality, celebrity gossip and feuds, consisting of THOUSANDS OF SHOWS AD-FREE! (it’s only $4.99 a month with a free-trial month) PLUS, subscribers get offers like early show releases and subscriber-only shows. Go to Caloroga.com for all our shows!
Join our new FB groups page here. Take the poll!
Join the Celebrity Trials community on social media! We're building a passionate group of true crime enthusiasts who love diving deep into the most shocking cases in America.
Follow us on Facebook and Instagram by searching "Celebrity Trials Podcast" on either platform.
You'll get exclusive behind-the-scenes content, breaking news updates on cases we're covering, and early alerts when new episodes drop. Our social media is where Reid Carter's hottest takes live, including reactions that don't make it into the show.
But more importantly, it's where YOU come in. Share your theories, debate the verdicts, and connect with fellow listeners who are just as obsessed with justice as you are. Did the jury get it right? What questions do you still have? Your comments and insights often shape future episodes.
We cover the trials that matter, but our community makes the conversation unforgettable. Come for Reid's signature cynical commentary, stay for the incredible discussions with thousands of true crime fans who get it.
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:03):
Caalarogu Shark Media. Good morning, I'm read Carter, and welcome
to Celebrity Trials. Yesterday, something remarkable happened in movie theaters
across America. Lindsay Lohan returned to the big screen in
Freakier Friday, twenty two years after the original. Twenty two years.
(00:24):
That's longer than she'd been alive when she first played
Anna Coleman, and between those two films a legal saga
that would make even the most creative screenwriter say, come on,
that's too much. Today and tomorrow, we're doing something different.
We're telling the story of someone who didn't murder anyone,
didn't dismember anybody, didn't text their kid into killing someone.
(00:45):
Lindsay Lohan's biggest victim was Lindsay Lohan, but her journey
through the American justice system reveals something just as disturbing
as any murder case. How fame, addiction, and wealth create
a parallel universe where consequences are more suggestion than certainty.
(01:06):
Picture this, a freckle faced eleven year old with red
hair and a smile that could sell anything from jello
to wonderbread. That was Lindsay Lohan in nineteen ninety eight,
playing twins in The Parent Trap, Disney's Newest Discovery, America's
Sweetheart in Training. Now picture this that same girl, twenty
(01:26):
one years old, stumbling out of a Beverly Hills police
station at three am with cocaine in her pocket and
a blood alcohol level twice the legal limit. The transformation
took less than a decade. How does that happen? How
does a kid who had everything talent, beauty, money, opportunity
end up with six mugshots and more time in rehab
(01:46):
than most people spend in college. And more importantly, how
does someone sentence to months in jail serve mere hours
while regular people wrought in those same cells for far less.
Let's start at the beginning, not the arrest record, beginning,
the real beginning, when Lindsay Lohan was just another kid
from Long Island with stage parents and a dream. Lindsay
(02:08):
Morgan Lohan was born July Tewod nineteen eighty six in
the Bronx. Her father, Michael was a Wall Street trader
who would later serve time for stock fraud. Her mother, Dina,
was a former radio city roquette who saw dollar signs
where she should have seen a daughter By age three,
Lindsay was modeling for Ford. By eleven, she was a
(02:28):
movie star. But here's what nobody talks about when they
discussed child stars, the loneliness. After Mean Girls exploded in
two thousand and four, Lohan moved into hotels, not an apartment, hotels,
the Four Seasons, the Chateau Marmont. For two years, she
lived at the Chateau Marmond, like some kind of teenage
(02:50):
Howard Hughes. Later she'd explain it, I didn't want to
be alone, so whatever I needed, I could just go
downstairs and there were people there. Think about that, an
eighteen year old girl, one of the most famous people
in America, so desperately lonely. She lived in a hotel
lobby for companionship. That's not Hollywood glamour. That's a tragedy
(03:13):
waiting to happen. The parents useless. Michael Lohan was in
and out of jail, in and out of their lives,
selling stories to tabloids whenever he needed cash. Dina was
too busy being Lindsay's mamager to actually be her mother.
Lindsay once said, I feel like a second parent in
the sense that I helped raise my family. She was
(03:34):
the breadwinner, the caretaker, the adult in the room while
she was still a teenager. By two thousand and six,
the cracks were showing she was attending alcoholics anonymous meetings.
At twenty. The girl who had everything was falling apart
in public, and we all watched. We bought the magazines,
(03:56):
we clicked the links, We made her destruction entertainment. Then
came Memorial Day weekend two thousand and seven, the beginning
of the end, or maybe the end of the beginning.
May twenty sixth two thousand and seven, two forty five am,
sunset Boulevard, Lindsay Low Hands, Mercedes Benz convertible, jumps a
(04:16):
curb and slams into a hedge. When police arrived, they
find more than just a drunk driver. They find cocaine.
The blood test would later show a blood alcohol level
of point one two, well above California's point zero eight limit.
This wasn't some teenager's first beer. This was a twenty
year old woman so intoxicated she couldn't keep a car
on the road with cocaine for dessert. She was supposed
(04:39):
to start filming Poor Things that week. Instead, she checked
into Promises Treatment center in Malibu promises. Even the name
sounds like marketing. We promise you'll get better. For ninety
thousand dollars a month, they better promise something. Lindsay lasted
forty five days. She got out July thirteenth, two thousand
(04:59):
and seven, with an alcohol monitoring bracelet on her ankle voluntarily.
Her people said, like that made it noble instead of necessary.
Eleven days. That's how long her sobriety lasted eleven days.
July twenty fourth, two thousand and seven, one thirty five am,
Pacific Coast Highway, Santa Monica. This time it wasn't just
(05:21):
a crashed Mercedes. This time there was a chase. Here's
what happened. According to police reports and witness statements, Lindsay's
assistant quit, The assistant's mother came to pick her up
from a party. Lindsay drunken high, jumped into a DENALISUV
and chased them down pch at speeds that would make
NASCAR jealous. The assistant's mother called nine to one one terrified.
(05:45):
I can't get her to stop following me, she told
the dispatcher. When police finally pulled Lindsay over in a
parking lot, she failed two breathalyzer tests. But wait, it
gets better or worse, depending on your perspective. During the
booking process, at least found cocaine in her pocket. Her excuse,
these weren't her pants, really, Lindsey, you're going with these
(06:06):
aren't my pants. That's what every junkie and every jail
in America says, and it never ever works. Oh and
remember that voluntary alcohol monitoring bracelet. She was wearing it
during the chase. It was literally recording her intoxication in
real time while she was committing multiple felonies. The charges
were spectacular. Two counts of driving under the influence, two
(06:29):
counts of driving with a blood alcohol level above point
zero eight, two counts of being under the influence of cocaine,
one count of reckless driving, and because she'd lost her
license after the first arrest, one count of driving on
a suspended license. Seven misdemeanors at twenty one years old.
August twenty third, two thousand and seven. The plea deal.
(06:51):
This is where the two tiered justice system really starts
to show itself. Seven misdemeanors, including two DUIs and cocaine possession.
The sentence one day in jail, ten days of community service,
three years of probation. That's it. One day for comparison.
I looked up California sentencing guidelines. A second DUI typically
(07:13):
carries a mandatory minimum of ninety six hours in jail.
That's four days, not one. And that's without the cocaine,
without the reckless driving, without the suspended license. But Lindsay
got twenty four hours. Want to know how long she
actually served? Eighty four minutes, one hour and twenty four minutes.
(07:34):
She checked into Lynwood Correctional Facility at ten thirty pm
on November fifteenth, two thousand and seven. She was released
at eleven fifty four pm. The Sheriff's department cited overcrowding. Overcrowding,
the same jail where regular people serve their full sentences,
sometimes more when they can't make bail, was too crowded
for Lindsay Lohan. She served less time than it takes
(07:56):
to watch Freaky Friday. Let me paint you a picture
of what eighty four mens minutes in jail looks like.
Processing takes about an hour, fingerprints, photos, paperwork. She probably
spent twenty minutes in an actual cell. Maybe she used
the toilet. Maybe she sat on the bench and thought
about her life, or maybe she just knew this was
(08:16):
all for show, that her lawyer had already arranged her
release before she ever walked in. Meanwhile, in that same jail,
there were people serving months for the same crimes. People
who couldn't afford Sean Holly, Lindsay's seven hundred dollars an
hour attorney who had worked on the oj Simpson Dream Team.
People whose parents weren't selling exclusives to Okay magazine to
(08:38):
pay for their defense. People who were actually being punished.
Back in a moment, welcome back to celebrity trials. I'm
read Carter, and we're exploring how Lindsay Lohan turned the
criminal justice system into a revolving door with a VIP pass.
(09:03):
After her eighty four minute incarceration, you'd think Lindsay might
have taken the hint. Three years of probation is a
long time. All she had to do was stay clean,
go to her alcohol education classes, and complete ten days
of community service. For someone with unlimited resources, a driver assistance,
and no actual job to report to, this should have
(09:23):
been easy. It wasn't. See here's what people don't understand
about addiction. It doesn't care about your bank account, it
doesn't care about your talent, it doesn't care that you
were in mean girls. Addiction is democratic that way. It'll
destroy anyone equally. The only difference is how long you
can afford to keep the destruction private. Lindsay couldn't keep
(09:45):
anything private. Every stumble was photographed, every fall documented. She
became a walking reality show before reality shows were even
a thing. The paparazzi followed her to AA meetings, to
court ordered classes, to rehab facilities. They made millions off
her misery. October two thousand and nine, two years into
(10:08):
her three year probation, Lindsay shows up to a progress
hearing over an hour late. The judge, Marsha Revel, is
not amused. Turns out Lindsay had been missing her alcohol
education classes, the same classes that were keeping her out
of jail. The judge extends her probation another year. But
here's where it gets interesting. Judge Revel says something that
(10:28):
should have been a warning. I wanted you to have
your career, but you cannot thumb your nose at this court.
Thumb your nose. That's a polite way of saying Lindsay
had been treating the justice system like a suggestion, not
a requirement, and she was about to learn that even
celebrity has its limits. May twenty ten, the Can Film Festival.
(10:57):
Lindsey is there promoting a film she's supposedly starring in Inferno,
where she'd play porn star Linda Lovelace. She's supposed to
be at a mandatory court hearing in Beverly Hills on
May twentieth. Her excuse for missing it she lost her passport.
She lost her passport in Can during the film festival
(11:19):
while partying on yachts and walking red carpets. The judge
issued a bench warrant for her arrest, which was only
lifted after Lindsay posted one hundred thousand dollars bail. When
she finally appeared in court on May twenty fourth, Judge
Revel had had enough. She ordered Lindsay to wear a
scram bracelet that's secure continuous remote alcohol monitor for those
(11:41):
keeping track. It tests your sweat every thirty minutes for alcohol,
no drinking period. She also ordered random weekly drug testing.
Two weeks later, June eighth, twenty ten, the MTV Movie Awards,
Lindsay's scram bracelet goes off like a fire alarm. The
device detected alcohol. Lindsay's excuse the bracelet malfunctioned. Right, The
(12:06):
same technology used to monitor thousands of offenders across the
country just happened to malfunction at the exact moment. Lindsay
was at a Hollywood party July sixth, twenty ten, the
day Lindsay Lohan cried in court and I mean sobbed,
ugly snot running makeup, destroying tears because Judge Revel was
(12:29):
done playing games. The photos from that day are devastating.
Lindsay in a gray suit, trying to look responsible, her
hair pulled back, minimal makeup, going for the I'm taking
this seriously look. But her fingernails told a different story.
Someone zoomed in on her middle finger, written in tiny
letters on the nail, fuck you. She had fuck you
(12:51):
written on her fingernail while begging a judge for mercy.
That's not defiance, that's delusion. Judge Revel sentenced her to
ninety days in jail for violating probation, followed by ninety
days in rehab. Lindsay's response, I did do everything that
I was told to do and did the best I could. No, Lindsay,
(13:13):
you didn't. You missed classes, you failed alcohol tests, you
showed up late to court, you fled the country to
avoid hearings. That's not doing your best. That's barely trying.
But here's the kicker of those ninety days in jail.
She served fourteen two weeks, released early due to overcrowding
and good behavior. Good behavior in two weeks, what did
(13:36):
she do? Teach yoga to the other inmates. The rehab
stint was equally meaningless. Ninety days became twenty three at
UCLA Medical Center. Then she was released to outpatient treatment,
which meant she could go home. The cycle continued. September
twenty fourth, twenty ten, failed drug test cocaine and amphetamines.
(13:58):
Back to jail, Released the same day after posting bail.
February twenty eleven, arrested for stealing a two five hundred
dollars necklace from a Venice jewelry store. The surveillance video
is damning. She walks out wearing it, never pays her
excuse she was borrowing it from a store without asking.
That's not borrowing, Lindsay, that's shoplifting. April twenty second, twenty eleven,
(14:25):
Sentenced to one hundred twenty days in jail for the
theft and probation violation, served five hours, not days hours.
She was fitted with an ankle monitor and sent home
for house arrest, during which she threw parties, failed alcohol tests,
and posted it all on social media. Are you seeing
the pattern? Arrest, conviction, sentence, release, repeat. It's like the
(14:47):
justice system had a revolving door with Lindsay's name on it.
November twenty eleven, back to jail for failing to complete
community service at a women's shelter. She was supposed to
do three hundred sixty hours. She'd done barely any the
excuse she didn't feel comfortable at the shelter, so they
(15:08):
moved her to the Morgue, the Los Angeles County Morgue,
because nothing says rehabilitation like making a drug addict organized
dead bodies, even that she couldn't do right. October twentieth,
twenty eleven, she shows up late to her first day
at the Morgue, the day after a judge had literally
just scolded her for being unreliable. She couldn't even be
(15:30):
on time to community service at a morgue dead people
were waiting for her, and she still couldn't show up.
The judge sentenced her to thirty days. She served four
and a half hours. At this point, it wasn't even
surprising anymore. It was expected. Lindsey Lohan goes to jail
like most people go to the DMV. Annoying brief, ultimately meaningless.
(15:58):
By twenty twelve, he'd been to court twenty times, twenty
appearances before four different judges, six probation violations, two DUIs,
one theft, countless failed drug tests. Total time served less
than two weeks. Total time in rehab over two hundred
and fifty days, but spread across so many facilities. It
(16:19):
was basically a tour of Southern California's treatment centers. Let
me put this in perspective. In twenty ten, a woman
named Patricia Spotted Crow in Oklahoma was sentenced to twelve
years in prison for selling thirty one dollars worth of marijuana,
first offense. She had kids. She served two years before
public outcry got her released. Lindsay Lohan poisoned herself and
(16:42):
others by driving drunk and high, stole property, violated probation repeatedly,
and served less time than it takes to binge, watch
a season of her reality show. That's not justice, that's
celebrity privilege wrapped in a legal bow. Tomorrow will explore
how Lindsay finally hit rock bottom, found her way out,
(17:03):
and managed something even more shocking than her arrests, a comeback.
We'll talk about the bling ring, breaking into her house,
her escape to Dubai, and how Freakier Friday represents more
than just a sequel. It's a redemption story Hollywood didn't
think was possible, but today sit with this. A young
woman was failed by everyone who should have protected her.
(17:25):
Her parents, who saw her as an ATM, the industry
which enabled her addiction as long as she showed up
to set, the justice system, which couldn't decide if she
was a criminal or a celebrity, and us, the public,
who turned her break down into entertainment. Lindsay Lohan didn't
need eighty four minutes in jail. She needed help, real help,
(17:46):
not ninety thousand dollars a month Malibu spa rehab, but
actual consequences and actual treatment. Instead, she got hashtags and
headlines I'm read Carter and this is Celebrity trials. Tomorrow
we'll see how Lindsay Lohan finally saved herself when nobody
else would. But today, remember this fame isn't a get
(18:07):
out of jail free card. It's a prison of its own.
See you tomorrow,
Caalarogu Shark Media. Good morning, I'm read Carter, and welcome
to Celebrity Trials. Yesterday, something remarkable happened in movie theaters
across America. Lindsay Lohan returned to the big screen in
Freakier Friday, twenty two years after the original. Twenty two years.
(00:24):
That's longer than she'd been alive when she first played
Anna Coleman, and between those two films a legal saga
that would make even the most creative screenwriter say, come on,
that's too much. Today and tomorrow, we're doing something different.
We're telling the story of someone who didn't murder anyone,
didn't dismember anybody, didn't text their kid into killing someone.
(00:45):
Lindsay Lohan's biggest victim was Lindsay Lohan, but her journey
through the American justice system reveals something just as disturbing
as any murder case. How fame, addiction, and wealth create
a parallel universe where consequences are more suggestion than certainty.
(01:06):
Picture this, a freckle faced eleven year old with red
hair and a smile that could sell anything from jello
to wonderbread. That was Lindsay Lohan in nineteen ninety eight,
playing twins in The Parent Trap, Disney's Newest Discovery, America's
Sweetheart in Training. Now picture this that same girl, twenty
(01:26):
one years old, stumbling out of a Beverly Hills police
station at three am with cocaine in her pocket and
a blood alcohol level twice the legal limit. The transformation
took less than a decade. How does that happen? How
does a kid who had everything talent, beauty, money, opportunity
end up with six mugshots and more time in rehab
(01:46):
than most people spend in college. And more importantly, how
does someone sentence to months in jail serve mere hours
while regular people wrought in those same cells for far less.
Let's start at the beginning, not the arrest record, beginning,
the real beginning, when Lindsay Lohan was just another kid
from Long Island with stage parents and a dream. Lindsay
(02:08):
Morgan Lohan was born July Tewod nineteen eighty six in
the Bronx. Her father, Michael was a Wall Street trader
who would later serve time for stock fraud. Her mother, Dina,
was a former radio city roquette who saw dollar signs
where she should have seen a daughter By age three,
Lindsay was modeling for Ford. By eleven, she was a
(02:28):
movie star. But here's what nobody talks about when they
discussed child stars, the loneliness. After Mean Girls exploded in
two thousand and four, Lohan moved into hotels, not an apartment, hotels,
the Four Seasons, the Chateau Marmont. For two years, she
lived at the Chateau Marmond, like some kind of teenage
(02:50):
Howard Hughes. Later she'd explain it, I didn't want to
be alone, so whatever I needed, I could just go
downstairs and there were people there. Think about that, an
eighteen year old girl, one of the most famous people
in America, so desperately lonely. She lived in a hotel
lobby for companionship. That's not Hollywood glamour. That's a tragedy
(03:13):
waiting to happen. The parents useless. Michael Lohan was in
and out of jail, in and out of their lives,
selling stories to tabloids whenever he needed cash. Dina was
too busy being Lindsay's mamager to actually be her mother.
Lindsay once said, I feel like a second parent in
the sense that I helped raise my family. She was
(03:34):
the breadwinner, the caretaker, the adult in the room while
she was still a teenager. By two thousand and six,
the cracks were showing she was attending alcoholics anonymous meetings.
At twenty. The girl who had everything was falling apart
in public, and we all watched. We bought the magazines,
(03:56):
we clicked the links, We made her destruction entertainment. Then
came Memorial Day weekend two thousand and seven, the beginning
of the end, or maybe the end of the beginning.
May twenty sixth two thousand and seven, two forty five am,
sunset Boulevard, Lindsay Low Hands, Mercedes Benz convertible, jumps a
(04:16):
curb and slams into a hedge. When police arrived, they
find more than just a drunk driver. They find cocaine.
The blood test would later show a blood alcohol level
of point one two, well above California's point zero eight limit.
This wasn't some teenager's first beer. This was a twenty
year old woman so intoxicated she couldn't keep a car
on the road with cocaine for dessert. She was supposed
(04:39):
to start filming Poor Things that week. Instead, she checked
into Promises Treatment center in Malibu promises. Even the name
sounds like marketing. We promise you'll get better. For ninety
thousand dollars a month, they better promise something. Lindsay lasted
forty five days. She got out July thirteenth, two thousand
(04:59):
and seven, with an alcohol monitoring bracelet on her ankle voluntarily.
Her people said, like that made it noble instead of necessary.
Eleven days. That's how long her sobriety lasted eleven days.
July twenty fourth, two thousand and seven, one thirty five am,
Pacific Coast Highway, Santa Monica. This time it wasn't just
(05:21):
a crashed Mercedes. This time there was a chase. Here's
what happened. According to police reports and witness statements, Lindsay's
assistant quit, The assistant's mother came to pick her up
from a party. Lindsay drunken high, jumped into a DENALISUV
and chased them down pch at speeds that would make
NASCAR jealous. The assistant's mother called nine to one one terrified.
(05:45):
I can't get her to stop following me, she told
the dispatcher. When police finally pulled Lindsay over in a
parking lot, she failed two breathalyzer tests. But wait, it
gets better or worse, depending on your perspective. During the
booking process, at least found cocaine in her pocket. Her excuse,
these weren't her pants, really, Lindsey, you're going with these
(06:06):
aren't my pants. That's what every junkie and every jail
in America says, and it never ever works. Oh and
remember that voluntary alcohol monitoring bracelet. She was wearing it
during the chase. It was literally recording her intoxication in
real time while she was committing multiple felonies. The charges
were spectacular. Two counts of driving under the influence, two
(06:29):
counts of driving with a blood alcohol level above point
zero eight, two counts of being under the influence of cocaine,
one count of reckless driving, and because she'd lost her
license after the first arrest, one count of driving on
a suspended license. Seven misdemeanors at twenty one years old.
August twenty third, two thousand and seven. The plea deal.
(06:51):
This is where the two tiered justice system really starts
to show itself. Seven misdemeanors, including two DUIs and cocaine possession.
The sentence one day in jail, ten days of community service,
three years of probation. That's it. One day for comparison.
I looked up California sentencing guidelines. A second DUI typically
(07:13):
carries a mandatory minimum of ninety six hours in jail.
That's four days, not one. And that's without the cocaine,
without the reckless driving, without the suspended license. But Lindsay
got twenty four hours. Want to know how long she
actually served? Eighty four minutes, one hour and twenty four minutes.
(07:34):
She checked into Lynwood Correctional Facility at ten thirty pm
on November fifteenth, two thousand and seven. She was released
at eleven fifty four pm. The Sheriff's department cited overcrowding. Overcrowding,
the same jail where regular people serve their full sentences,
sometimes more when they can't make bail, was too crowded
for Lindsay Lohan. She served less time than it takes
(07:56):
to watch Freaky Friday. Let me paint you a picture
of what eighty four mens minutes in jail looks like.
Processing takes about an hour, fingerprints, photos, paperwork. She probably
spent twenty minutes in an actual cell. Maybe she used
the toilet. Maybe she sat on the bench and thought
about her life, or maybe she just knew this was
(08:16):
all for show, that her lawyer had already arranged her
release before she ever walked in. Meanwhile, in that same jail,
there were people serving months for the same crimes. People
who couldn't afford Sean Holly, Lindsay's seven hundred dollars an
hour attorney who had worked on the oj Simpson Dream Team.
People whose parents weren't selling exclusives to Okay magazine to
(08:38):
pay for their defense. People who were actually being punished.
Back in a moment, welcome back to celebrity trials. I'm
read Carter, and we're exploring how Lindsay Lohan turned the
criminal justice system into a revolving door with a VIP pass.
(09:03):
After her eighty four minute incarceration, you'd think Lindsay might
have taken the hint. Three years of probation is a
long time. All she had to do was stay clean,
go to her alcohol education classes, and complete ten days
of community service. For someone with unlimited resources, a driver assistance,
and no actual job to report to, this should have
(09:23):
been easy. It wasn't. See here's what people don't understand
about addiction. It doesn't care about your bank account, it
doesn't care about your talent, it doesn't care that you
were in mean girls. Addiction is democratic that way. It'll
destroy anyone equally. The only difference is how long you
can afford to keep the destruction private. Lindsay couldn't keep
(09:45):
anything private. Every stumble was photographed, every fall documented. She
became a walking reality show before reality shows were even
a thing. The paparazzi followed her to AA meetings, to
court ordered classes, to rehab facilities. They made millions off
her misery. October two thousand and nine, two years into
(10:08):
her three year probation, Lindsay shows up to a progress
hearing over an hour late. The judge, Marsha Revel, is
not amused. Turns out Lindsay had been missing her alcohol
education classes, the same classes that were keeping her out
of jail. The judge extends her probation another year. But
here's where it gets interesting. Judge Revel says something that
(10:28):
should have been a warning. I wanted you to have
your career, but you cannot thumb your nose at this court.
Thumb your nose. That's a polite way of saying Lindsay
had been treating the justice system like a suggestion, not
a requirement, and she was about to learn that even
celebrity has its limits. May twenty ten, the Can Film Festival.
(10:57):
Lindsey is there promoting a film she's supposedly starring in Inferno,
where she'd play porn star Linda Lovelace. She's supposed to
be at a mandatory court hearing in Beverly Hills on
May twentieth. Her excuse for missing it she lost her passport.
She lost her passport in Can during the film festival
(11:19):
while partying on yachts and walking red carpets. The judge
issued a bench warrant for her arrest, which was only
lifted after Lindsay posted one hundred thousand dollars bail. When
she finally appeared in court on May twenty fourth, Judge
Revel had had enough. She ordered Lindsay to wear a
scram bracelet that's secure continuous remote alcohol monitor for those
(11:41):
keeping track. It tests your sweat every thirty minutes for alcohol,
no drinking period. She also ordered random weekly drug testing.
Two weeks later, June eighth, twenty ten, the MTV Movie Awards,
Lindsay's scram bracelet goes off like a fire alarm. The
device detected alcohol. Lindsay's excuse the bracelet malfunctioned. Right, The
(12:06):
same technology used to monitor thousands of offenders across the
country just happened to malfunction at the exact moment. Lindsay
was at a Hollywood party July sixth, twenty ten, the
day Lindsay Lohan cried in court and I mean sobbed,
ugly snot running makeup, destroying tears because Judge Revel was
(12:29):
done playing games. The photos from that day are devastating.
Lindsay in a gray suit, trying to look responsible, her
hair pulled back, minimal makeup, going for the I'm taking
this seriously look. But her fingernails told a different story.
Someone zoomed in on her middle finger, written in tiny
letters on the nail, fuck you. She had fuck you
(12:51):
written on her fingernail while begging a judge for mercy.
That's not defiance, that's delusion. Judge Revel sentenced her to
ninety days in jail for violating probation, followed by ninety
days in rehab. Lindsay's response, I did do everything that
I was told to do and did the best I could. No, Lindsay,
(13:13):
you didn't. You missed classes, you failed alcohol tests, you
showed up late to court, you fled the country to
avoid hearings. That's not doing your best. That's barely trying.
But here's the kicker of those ninety days in jail.
She served fourteen two weeks, released early due to overcrowding
and good behavior. Good behavior in two weeks, what did
(13:36):
she do? Teach yoga to the other inmates. The rehab
stint was equally meaningless. Ninety days became twenty three at
UCLA Medical Center. Then she was released to outpatient treatment,
which meant she could go home. The cycle continued. September
twenty fourth, twenty ten, failed drug test cocaine and amphetamines.
(13:58):
Back to jail, Released the same day after posting bail.
February twenty eleven, arrested for stealing a two five hundred
dollars necklace from a Venice jewelry store. The surveillance video
is damning. She walks out wearing it, never pays her
excuse she was borrowing it from a store without asking.
That's not borrowing, Lindsay, that's shoplifting. April twenty second, twenty eleven,
(14:25):
Sentenced to one hundred twenty days in jail for the
theft and probation violation, served five hours, not days hours.
She was fitted with an ankle monitor and sent home
for house arrest, during which she threw parties, failed alcohol tests,
and posted it all on social media. Are you seeing
the pattern? Arrest, conviction, sentence, release, repeat. It's like the
(14:47):
justice system had a revolving door with Lindsay's name on it.
November twenty eleven, back to jail for failing to complete
community service at a women's shelter. She was supposed to
do three hundred sixty hours. She'd done barely any the
excuse she didn't feel comfortable at the shelter, so they
(15:08):
moved her to the Morgue, the Los Angeles County Morgue,
because nothing says rehabilitation like making a drug addict organized
dead bodies, even that she couldn't do right. October twentieth,
twenty eleven, she shows up late to her first day
at the Morgue, the day after a judge had literally
just scolded her for being unreliable. She couldn't even be
(15:30):
on time to community service at a morgue dead people
were waiting for her, and she still couldn't show up.
The judge sentenced her to thirty days. She served four
and a half hours. At this point, it wasn't even
surprising anymore. It was expected. Lindsey Lohan goes to jail
like most people go to the DMV. Annoying brief, ultimately meaningless.
(15:58):
By twenty twelve, he'd been to court twenty times, twenty
appearances before four different judges, six probation violations, two DUIs,
one theft, countless failed drug tests. Total time served less
than two weeks. Total time in rehab over two hundred
and fifty days, but spread across so many facilities. It
(16:19):
was basically a tour of Southern California's treatment centers. Let
me put this in perspective. In twenty ten, a woman
named Patricia Spotted Crow in Oklahoma was sentenced to twelve
years in prison for selling thirty one dollars worth of marijuana,
first offense. She had kids. She served two years before
public outcry got her released. Lindsay Lohan poisoned herself and
(16:42):
others by driving drunk and high, stole property, violated probation repeatedly,
and served less time than it takes to binge, watch
a season of her reality show. That's not justice, that's
celebrity privilege wrapped in a legal bow. Tomorrow will explore
how Lindsay finally hit rock bottom, found her way out,
(17:03):
and managed something even more shocking than her arrests, a comeback.
We'll talk about the bling ring, breaking into her house,
her escape to Dubai, and how Freakier Friday represents more
than just a sequel. It's a redemption story Hollywood didn't
think was possible, but today sit with this. A young
woman was failed by everyone who should have protected her.
(17:25):
Her parents, who saw her as an ATM, the industry
which enabled her addiction as long as she showed up
to set, the justice system, which couldn't decide if she
was a criminal or a celebrity, and us, the public,
who turned her break down into entertainment. Lindsay Lohan didn't
need eighty four minutes in jail. She needed help, real help,
(17:46):
not ninety thousand dollars a month Malibu spa rehab, but
actual consequences and actual treatment. Instead, she got hashtags and
headlines I'm read Carter and this is Celebrity trials. Tomorrow
we'll see how Lindsay Lohan finally saved herself when nobody
else would. But today, remember this fame isn't a get
(18:07):
out of jail free card. It's a prison of its own.
See you tomorrow,
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