Classic Radio 09-23-25 - Leila returns, Edgar to New York, and Milton to Canada - Classic Radio Theater with Wyatt Cox

Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:10):
Now the greatest radio shows of all time.

Speaker 2 (00:14):
Suspense, Shadow Note Washington, calling David Honey, count.

Speaker 3 (00:19):
As my classic Radios Theater, The.

Speaker 4 (00:22):
Great Yilder Slave, Zipa McGhee and Molly Dragonest Guns Alone,
rang Zoe.

Speaker 1 (00:29):
Now step back into a time machine.

Speaker 5 (00:31):
It's your host, Wyatt Cox.

Speaker 6 (00:34):
Good Evening Friend, Vionna Tanto.

Speaker 7 (00:39):
Comedy on this Tuesday, with episodes of The Great Gilder
Sleeves starring Harold Perry, The Charlie McCarthy Show, also The
Milton Burrell Show, and the Screen Director's Playhouse production of
Don't Trust Your Wife starring Fred McMurray. And we'll wrap
it all up with an episode of The Lomon Amner that's
coming up on this Tuesday. This is the twenty third

(01:01):
day of September, two hundred and sixty sixth day of
the year. Ninety nine days left until twenty twenty five.
Bids adieu and the autumnal equinox, meaning that we are
heading into the fall months and cooler weather and shorter
days and all that stuff, at least in the Northern Hemisphere.

(01:25):
Down in the southern Hemisphere, it still gets start warming
up because there's this finishing winter seventeen eighty, British Major
John Andre arrested as a spy by American soldiers exposing
Benedict Arnold's treason. Lewis and Clark returned to Saint Louis
on this date in eighteen oh six after exploring the

(01:47):
Pacific Northwest. In eighteen forty six, the discovery of Neptune
by French astronomer Urbane Jean Joseph Lepier and British astronomer
John couch Adams verified by German astronomer Johann Gottrid Gal
on this date in eighteen forty six. Herman Hollwrez patenting

(02:09):
his mechanical tabulating machine in eighteen eighty four. In nineteen
forty two, the first day of the September Matanicoo Action
on Guadalcanal, as marine forces attacked Imperial Japanese Army units
along the Matanique River, was on this date. In nineteen

(02:31):
forty four, President Roosevelt opened the nineteen forty four presidential
campaign speaking at a dinner with the International Teamsters Union
in Washington, and made a star of a companion of his.

Speaker 8 (02:44):
These Republican leaders have not been content with attack on
me or my wife are on my son. No, not
with that.

Speaker 2 (03:01):
They now include my little dog Bala.

Speaker 8 (03:09):
Well, of course I don't attack my family, don't present attacks,
but Palla does.

Speaker 7 (03:24):
The joke suggested to the president by Orson Well speech
broadcast nationwide, credited with FDR winning his fourth term UH
and another dog facing serious opposition within his own party.
On this date in nineteen fifty two, then presidential vice

(03:46):
presidential candidate Richard Nixon went on national television in the
fight for his political life, against the background of accusations,
making a speech about Checkers.

Speaker 9 (03:58):
I own a nineteen fifty old mobile cor We have
our furniture, We have no stocks and bonds of any
time we did get something a gift, it was a
little Cocker Spaniel dog black and white spotted, and our
little girl, Trisha, the six year old, named Checkers. And
I just want to say this right now that regardless
of what they say about it, we're going to.

Speaker 10 (04:18):
Keep it wire and write.

Speaker 9 (04:19):
The Republican National Committee whether you think I should stay
on or whether I should get off, I'm going to
continue this fight. I'm going to campaign up and down
in America until we drive the crooks and the communists
and those that defend them out of Washington.

Speaker 6 (04:32):
Time brid music on this program is now elaxed.

Speaker 7 (04:35):
The party was convinced to keep Nixon in and as
you know, he and General Eisenhower won the White House
for the Republicans. And by the way, we almost talk
about how radio people couldn't get off on time. You
saw their political speech couldn't get off on time. But

(05:00):
between Phala and checkers today is and I'm serious, this
is considered national dogs in politics day. And we're not
even talking about candidates. We're talking about a real four
legged friends. It was on this date in nineteen fifty seven,
nine black students entered Little Rock Central High School in Arkansas.

(05:23):
They were forced to withdraw because of a white mob outside.
One of them, Thelmajeen Mother shed Ware, recalled that day
years later.

Speaker 11 (05:34):
There was a mob to the mob, mob Bob with
people who should have been at Wood, but they came
there to see make sure that nine black kids did
not into their sacred high school.

Speaker 7 (05:45):
Now in Washington, President Eisenhower issued in the executive order
federalizing the National Guard and sending a thousand Army paratroopers
from the one hundred and first Airborne Division to escort
the students into the school. The military presence remained from
the day they got there September twenty fifth, for the

(06:07):
duration of the school year as the students endured ongoing abuse. Now,
to the people who say that America is a racist nation,
you don't have to have you don't have to have

(06:29):
armed guards to get you into school safely. You may
have arm guard, have to have arm guards to protect
you when you're in school from some thugs, but by
and large, we don't have the people today who caused
all the grief back then. Jetson's premiered on this date

(06:51):
in nineteen sixty two. Georgia O'Hanlon the voice of George
from the series premiere until his death in nineteen eighty nine.
Penny Singleton gave voice to Jane Jetson as she had
the comic strip Wife Blondie on the radio and on
the silver screen, and classic voice actors DAWs Butler and
Janet Waldo playing children Elroy and Judy Jetson. Did you

(07:13):
know that only seventy five Jetson's programs produced twenty four
for their initial primetime run, then another fifty one between
nineteen eighty five and nineteen eighty seven. It was on
this date back in nineteen eighty seven, and something that
a lot of people have forgotten. Senator Joe Biden of
Delaware running for president for the eighty eight race. He

(07:38):
dropped out after tape surface showing he had lifted sections
of other people's speeches without credit. Also records of apparent
plagiarism during law school surface.

Speaker 12 (07:50):
Although it's awfully clear to me what choice I have
to make, I have to tell you honestly, I do
it with incredible reluctance, and it makes me angry.

Speaker 7 (08:01):
Well, you know the rest of the story. He had
joined the ticket of Barack Obama as vice president. He
would run on his own in twenty twenty, winning a
single term as president. First public version of the web
browser Mozilla Firefox released on this date in two thousand
and two, and in twenty eleven, All My Children broadcast

(08:23):
its final episode on ABC, ending its forty one year run,
and it was on this date. In twenty nineteen, the
British travel company Thomas Cook Group declared bankruptcy, leaving employees
without job, six hundred thousand customers stranded abroad, Hotels throughout
the world stuck with four point three million dollars in
unpaid bills, and who knows how many had travelers checks

(08:47):
that the company issued. Passing away on this date in history.
The psychiatry Sigmund Freud, Cliff Arquette, Charlie Weaver, and Joanna
on NEWHARTR. Fran all passing away on this date in history.
Among those who have left this mortal coil but born

(09:08):
on this date include actor Walter Pidgeon, actor Mickey Rooney,
musician Ray Charles ebb On Green Acres, Tom Lester, and
actress Michelle Thomas. All those folks are born on this date,
they have left this mortal coil.

Speaker 2 (09:25):
Hi, this is Jeff Foxworthy. It is now time for
the birthday announcements. The following people are now officially older
than dirt.

Speaker 7 (09:33):
Julio Aglaciers toldy girls I loved before. Eighty two years
old today. He was Jeff Stone on The Donna Reed Show,
but also had a hit record. Paul Peterson eighty years
old today. Mary kay Place for Mary Hartman Mary Hartman

(09:54):
and had a hit record as well, called baby Boy.
Mary k Place seventy eight years old today. Bruce Springsteen
is seventy six, who talks about how what sound he
was going.

Speaker 13 (10:06):
For in In seventy five, we went into the studio
to make Born to Run and wanted to make a
record with words like Bob Dylan. It sounded like Phil Specker,
but most of all, I've wanted to sing like Roy Orbison.

Speaker 7 (10:18):
Kind of a melting pot, don't you know? Bruce Springsteen
seventy six years old today. She was Klinger's wife on
mash Keiko O'Brien, the wife of Miles O'Brien and Star
Trek the next generation in Star Trek D Spaces Deep
Space nine. Rosalind Chow sixty eight years old today from Seinfeld.

(10:39):
Jason Alexander is sixty six.

Speaker 14 (10:41):
I feel like my old self again.

Speaker 15 (10:43):
Totally inadequate, completely insecure, paranoid, neurotic.

Speaker 2 (10:47):
It's a pleasure.

Speaker 7 (10:48):
Sounds like a lot of radio people I know. Jason
Alexander sixty six years old today. Matt Hardy Delete Delete Delete,
the pro wrestler fifty one years old today from the
Pitch Perfect movie Skyler Aston is thirty eight, and another
wrestler from WWE, Carrie Sane, is thirty seven. Those just

(11:11):
a few of the people celebrating the twenty third day
of September is their birthday. And if this is your birthday, we.

Speaker 10 (11:21):
Baked you a birthday cake.

Speaker 16 (11:23):
If you get it to may A and you moan
and grown and woe.

Speaker 4 (11:28):
Don't forget we told you so.

Speaker 17 (11:33):
MCA wishneer and blow out the candles.

Speaker 7 (11:36):
Here they go, well, not unlike a lot of my birthdays.
We roll on now with Classic Radio Theater with Wyatcox
with an episode of the Great Gilder Sleeve. And we're
gonna go back to eighty years as Leela Ransom returns

(11:58):
to Summerfield.

Speaker 18 (12:05):
Daily, the broadcasts of Radio Free Europe and Radio Free
Asia strike through the Iron Curtain, bringing the truth about
the free world. The captive people's behind it. Help send
a message by giving to the nineteen fifty two Crusade
for Freedom.

Speaker 7 (12:21):
And we're going to spend this Tuesday with a couple
of shows. From Sunday, the twenty third day of September
nineteen forty five, We're going to start up at six
point thirty on NBC for Harold Parry as the Great
Guilder Sleeve.

Speaker 2 (12:38):
The Kraft Foods Company presents the Great Guilder Sleeve.

Speaker 8 (13:01):
It's the Great Gilder Sleeve. Starring Harold Perry.

Speaker 2 (13:04):
Brought to you by the Craft Foods Company, makers of
Mark Marjarine and a complete line of famous quality food products.
Now let's join the great gilders Sleeve, who was up
early this morning. There's a nip of wattum in the air,
but Guildersleeve is taking his morning bath just the same,

(13:25):
and we can hear him.

Speaker 8 (13:27):
I love life and I want to live. I love
you darn soap. Oh well, I love life and I love.

Speaker 17 (13:52):
Boy. These hotcakes are really super. Shoot the syrup will here, Leroy,
you don't have to drown them.

Speaker 1 (14:00):
It to you.

Speaker 17 (14:00):
You waste so much, Sarah, I.

Speaker 19 (14:02):
Won't waste any I'll use it up with more cakes.

Speaker 20 (14:05):
Your table manners are disgusting. You'll be sorry if you're
ever invited out anywhere.

Speaker 19 (14:10):
I got swell and as my good Gosh, did you
hear Nks singing up there?

Speaker 17 (14:14):
He feels swell today. I know I know why too, Yeah,
why missus Ransom is coming home today? Gosh?

Speaker 19 (14:21):
Is that any reason for him to go crazy?

Speaker 21 (14:24):
Singing?

Speaker 17 (14:24):
Isn't crazy?

Speaker 19 (14:27):
Nobody's shaved twice and he gave me seventy five cents
to go to the football game next Saturday.

Speaker 1 (14:36):
Didn't even argue.

Speaker 17 (14:37):
You'll understand someday, little boy, Ah.

Speaker 19 (14:40):
You think everything is love romance? Here comes the great lover.

Speaker 20 (14:46):
Now hey, Bertie Hooks coming down.

Speaker 8 (14:52):
Well, good morning.

Speaker 17 (14:54):
Good morning, Unkie. I told Bertie you were here.

Speaker 8 (14:56):
Unk I heard you, My boy.

Speaker 17 (14:58):
Is that a new shoe, donkey, It's lovely.

Speaker 8 (15:01):
P K. I bought it yesterday. It looks so rich
post war shirt. I've been able to buy this kind
of stuff. Good morning, Bertie, though productionless jewel the hotcakes
this morning.

Speaker 19 (15:16):
Take the hotcakes.

Speaker 8 (15:17):
That's super. You've tested them thoroughly, have you, Leroy.

Speaker 1 (15:21):
I'll say he's been eating like a pig.

Speaker 8 (15:24):
Fella's a certain amount of pig and every boy, my dear,
I'll try the cakes, Bertie.

Speaker 16 (15:30):
Yes, sir, I got some bad news for you, missus.

Speaker 8 (15:32):
Gilsey, Well, bad news. He what is it?

Speaker 22 (15:35):
The refrigerators on the blink?

Speaker 8 (15:37):
The milkman says, we'll have to have a new motor. Oh, well,
i'd expect it someday. I'll attend to it this morning, positively, positively,
bring on the hotcakes.

Speaker 16 (15:44):
Yes, if the stove is still working.

Speaker 8 (15:50):
Well, glorious morning, isn't the children?

Speaker 20 (15:52):
Yeah, say Unkie, yes, my dear, Oh never mind, what
is it, Marjorie?

Speaker 17 (15:58):
Nothing?

Speaker 20 (15:59):
I was going to ask you for something, but I won't.
It'd be taking advantage of you. What do you mean, Well,
you're happy this morning, and I.

Speaker 8 (16:07):
Know why, my smart little niece. Well, if you're too
nice to ask for anything, I'll have to be nice too.
You can go down to Hogan Brothers and get anything
you want up to five dollars.

Speaker 20 (16:20):
Oh, hunk, you're a darling, you think so?

Speaker 8 (16:23):
Uh huh. That reminds me I've got to make an
important phone call. Will you excuse me? Children?

Speaker 1 (16:30):
Surely?

Speaker 17 (16:30):
Uncle Mark?

Speaker 19 (16:32):
How do I don't like that five dollars?

Speaker 4 (16:34):
Oh?

Speaker 16 (16:34):
My god?

Speaker 19 (16:35):
Was allowed his football ticket behind the gold post.

Speaker 17 (16:41):
I didn't ask for anything.

Speaker 8 (16:42):
Oh no, Hello Summerfield Grill. This is Rocking mart and
beat Gillies League. This is water commissioner at Guildishly. Yes,
I'd like to reserve a table for two at luncheon today,
please about one o'clock, Gus, I wonder if you could
give me that little boot in the corner. That's right,

(17:09):
thank you very.

Speaker 17 (17:09):
Much, horse sake.

Speaker 19 (17:12):
I got out of seat that a fifty yard line.

Speaker 8 (17:25):
Hi clesh, Hello Cloyd, do you take care of me
pretty soon. I sure come on and take off your coat.
I got a friend of you. I was under the
towel here, but he'll be through in a minute. A friend. Eh, Well,
let's see. Who do I know with big flat feet
and a little round pot belly? Why?

Speaker 23 (17:41):
Yeah?

Speaker 8 (17:41):
And the voice sounds for me? Here is that his
nose sticking up there like Fujiyama? Here?

Speaker 4 (17:47):
Yellow sleeve?

Speaker 8 (17:47):
Well, judge hooker, I never thought it was you.

Speaker 24 (17:50):
Oh, you're not polling me for a minute. If I
were as fat as you, I go slow making fun.

Speaker 8 (17:54):
Of other people. I'll have you no horse that I've
taken three inches off my stomach this summer.

Speaker 24 (17:59):
You have looks like you just moved it around the rear, right,
what's a.

Speaker 8 (18:13):
Matter of commissioner, can't enjoy a joke? Yeah?

Speaker 24 (18:15):
Where'd your sense of humor?

Speaker 16 (18:16):
Guilty?

Speaker 8 (18:21):
I'd like a mustache trim Floyd? If you're through with
this comedian, I right up there, Commissioner, I'll make you
look like Ronald Coleman.

Speaker 24 (18:28):
You don't strain yourself liked.

Speaker 16 (18:31):
Getting prettied up for a certain party.

Speaker 8 (18:33):
Guildy. Maybe I am, maybe I'm not.

Speaker 4 (18:35):
I don't know who you're trying to fools. Rock Martin's
in the paper. She's coming home today.

Speaker 8 (18:39):
Oh that widow Missus Ransom. Yeah, I saw that in
the paper. Well, who the devil put it in the paper?

Speaker 4 (18:46):
Leela probably wrote the society editor. She always calls up
when she's giving a party publicity.

Speaker 8 (18:51):
Why do people want it? Women? They're the ones that
like it. Every time my mother in law comes over
from Sark City, my wife calls up the paper mister
and missus Floyd munsoner entertaining Missus Munson's mother for a
brief visit. When she finally goes home, they print that too,
the mustache Floyd. I can't spend the day, okay, Commissioner.

(19:12):
The old lady keeps a scrap book. She's got that
item pasted in there, twenty times out with Lloyd? Okay,
Going to meet Leela Gilder, I thought of it.

Speaker 4 (19:22):
How did he?

Speaker 8 (19:23):
If I go along? Give her a little spot? Hey,
I got a better idea. Why don't we all go
down and meet it? The Jolly boys are getting together
tonight anyway, Missus Ransom is coming in early this afternoon.
Oh that's too bad. We could have a lot of laughs.

Speaker 4 (19:35):
Why don't I try to round the boys up right now,
she'd probably get a big kick out of it.

Speaker 8 (19:39):
I don't think so, Floyd. It wouldn't be very dignified. Dignified.
The girl likes a little fun, don't she. I always
thought she did. I don't care to hear your thoughts
regarding missus Ransom, Floyd, and I'm a posed to the
whole idea of the jolly boys meeting her.

Speaker 4 (19:56):
Mister gilders Lead is right, Floyd, Thank you, Horace. I
think the nicest thing would be if just you and
I went down to meet her.

Speaker 8 (20:02):
Guildey, Oh, why you knows the old goat Yeldey.

Speaker 24 (20:06):
We'll give a Lila a nice surprise together.

Speaker 4 (20:09):
I gotta go to my office for a few minutes,
but I need you at the station.

Speaker 24 (20:12):
What train's you coming in on?

Speaker 4 (20:15):
What train?

Speaker 24 (20:16):
Yeah?

Speaker 8 (20:17):
The twelve fifteen trains.

Speaker 16 (20:19):
All right, I'll be there, Yeah, Flod thanks, good see
it station.

Speaker 17 (20:23):
Guildy.

Speaker 8 (20:27):
Well, he kind of put one over on you there,
didn't he commission you think? So? Floyd finished me up.
I got to get out to the airport.

Speaker 2 (20:51):
Life number six Savannah kna coming in.

Speaker 14 (20:56):
On runway too. Passengers will uncoat.

Speaker 24 (20:59):
And gate.

Speaker 8 (21:01):
Trying to make this one horse airport sound like like
why do you field?

Speaker 21 (21:05):
Well?

Speaker 8 (21:06):
Only one gate must be gate one?

Speaker 15 (21:08):
Oh just right, hair, please sir, Only passengers and employees
come through.

Speaker 8 (21:12):
Oh deep, Say aren't you the fellow that was talking
through the loudspeaker?

Speaker 14 (21:16):
Yes, that was me.

Speaker 8 (21:18):
Huh. Why don't they let the people off?

Speaker 14 (21:20):
They're coming now, sir?

Speaker 8 (21:22):
Oh, yes, there she is, Lila, Lilah. She's waving. I
guess she sees me.

Speaker 14 (21:30):
Yes, I guess so.

Speaker 8 (21:31):
I wasn't talking to you.

Speaker 17 (21:34):
John, of you to come and meet me.

Speaker 14 (21:41):
Am.

Speaker 8 (21:41):
I glad to see you, Rock.

Speaker 17 (21:46):
What will people find?

Speaker 8 (21:50):
Anybody can kiss anybody in railroad station, but this she's
an airpole of the Airline's outlaw kissing. They'll lose a
lot of customers. I can tell you that. Where's your baggage?

Speaker 25 (21:59):
Lee?

Speaker 17 (22:00):
Oh well, this is all I have, this little bit
of handbag. I got so many and you closed down home.
I had to buy a trunk and they won't let
you take a trunk on a flying machine.

Speaker 8 (22:08):
Oh, let me carry your hand bag.

Speaker 17 (22:12):
Thank you for Rock.

Speaker 8 (22:13):
Come on, Lda, let's get in the car all right.

Speaker 17 (22:16):
Oh I wonder if I could make a phone call
Fish there must be a boothy.

Speaker 8 (22:20):
Well, sure, only what's your hurry?

Speaker 17 (22:21):
But it won't take but a second, rock Mane.

Speaker 8 (22:23):
Well, the booth's right over there. I'll wait here at
the news stand.

Speaker 17 (22:26):
Oh yeahre a dog, and I won't be a minute ago.

Speaker 8 (22:29):
Well the girl, George, it must be great down south.
Imagine an old town full of Leila's.

Speaker 14 (22:37):
If you want a magazine?

Speaker 4 (22:39):
Sir?

Speaker 15 (22:39):
Are you running the news stand too? Yes, but I'm
closing it up now. I've got to go over and
open up the ticket office.

Speaker 8 (22:46):
Well first, why did I tell you? But not quick?
Oh you're certainly worthy. Now come on, I'll drive into town.
I'm taking you to lunch at the Summerfield Grill. And
I hope that guy isn't the waiter. I've reserved it booth.

Speaker 17 (23:01):
Leela, Oh rock Martin, if I only know.

Speaker 8 (23:05):
Well that's the difference, surprise.

Speaker 17 (23:06):
Well it's simple, sweet, I've you to a float of it,
and I'm heartbroken.

Speaker 1 (23:10):
I can't go, can't go.

Speaker 8 (23:12):
Well, i'd counted on it, Leela, a nice lunch and
then maybe a nice drive out by the reservoir.

Speaker 17 (23:17):
Oh it sounds it sounds heavenly. Well, come on, Well,
I can't Strock Martin. I just called my hairdressing. If
I get there in fifteen minutes, she.

Speaker 8 (23:27):
Can take me hairdresser, Leela, are you standing.

Speaker 14 (23:29):
Me up for that?

Speaker 26 (23:30):
Oh?

Speaker 17 (23:31):
Now, Darling, I was hoping I might see it tonight
after shovel.

Speaker 8 (23:37):
I was hoping to see you this afternoon.

Speaker 17 (23:42):
I'll be lts prettier this evening, and I've got a
new dress I think you like, at least I hope show.

Speaker 8 (23:49):
New dress, Leli. You haven't got the dress in this
little bitty and bag.

Speaker 27 (23:53):
Mm.

Speaker 8 (24:07):
I'll drop around right after supper got.

Speaker 2 (24:25):
We'll be back with the Great Gilder Sleeve in just
a moment.

Speaker 20 (24:29):
Mister Lang, didn't you make a slight error at the
start of this program?

Speaker 2 (24:33):
Well, I know, not that I know of Well.

Speaker 20 (24:36):
I thought I heard you say the Craft Foods Company
presents the Great Guilder Sleeve.

Speaker 8 (24:40):
That's just what I said, the Craft Foods Company.

Speaker 1 (24:43):
But isn't the name Craft Cheese Company?

Speaker 6 (24:46):
Not anymore?

Speaker 2 (24:47):
From now on, It's the Craft Foods Company, because you see,
the Craft Company not only makes a wide variety of
fine cheese and cheese foods, but also is known for
many other top quality food products.

Speaker 8 (24:59):
For a ample park margarine Park is one of my favorites,
such a delicious spread for bread, hot toast, and rolls.

Speaker 2 (25:07):
It's a favorite of millions because Park margarine has a fresh,
delicate flavor that is still unmatched by any other brand.

Speaker 16 (25:15):
I found.

Speaker 15 (25:15):
It's economical too, only about half the price of costly spreads.

Speaker 2 (25:19):
And don't forget the maker of this delicious, economical spread
is the Craft Foods Company.

Speaker 1 (25:26):
I stand corrected, mister Lang, I'll remember Craft Foods Company.

Speaker 2 (25:31):
That's right, b A r Kay Park Margarine made by
the Craft Foods Company. Try it soon, you'll be glad
you did well.

Speaker 8 (25:52):
Now let's see what's in store for Guildersleeve.

Speaker 2 (25:55):
That's what the great Man himself is wondering as he
sits twiddling his thumbs at his desk in the water department.
But perhaps we'd get a better idea if we looked
in on Pev's drug store, where the proprietor is welcoming
back an old customer, A rank to see you back.

Speaker 17 (26:14):
It's nice to be back. What kind of a summer
did you have? Mister Peevie Crie Crie and missus Peevee?

Speaker 28 (26:23):
How she she can't complain? Perhaps I shouldn't say that
she hung the hole. She's been pretty well.

Speaker 17 (26:30):
That's good. Uh tell me, mister Peevie. How is mister Gildish.

Speaker 2 (26:34):
Leave these days?

Speaker 28 (26:35):
Mister Yer, Well, he was in here the other day
for your bottle of little Barbon soda. But I don't
believe it there was anything serious at the temporary upset.

Speaker 17 (26:46):
Well, I mean, what's he been up to this summer?

Speaker 28 (26:49):
And I really couldn't say nothing new then. And you know,
mister Jonerie, he's trying to keep track of one day.
It's one thing you next dance.

Speaker 17 (26:58):
Up now, aren't you right?

Speaker 24 (27:01):
Was there something you answer?

Speaker 8 (27:03):
Oh?

Speaker 17 (27:03):
Oh, yes, I want to get a lipstick. I'm afraid
I lost mine on the plane.

Speaker 28 (27:07):
Lipstick, Yes, indeed, I seem to have put a selection here. Ah,
there's one. Let's put out by Hubigun's revival firm has
good wearing quality, so they tell me mm hmm. And
then here's one that goes by the name of first Blush.
That's the name of the car.

Speaker 17 (27:27):
Oh, I'm afraid that would be a little lie.

Speaker 28 (27:30):
I haven't got another one here that's called Shame. I
take it that's a little redder.

Speaker 17 (27:38):
Well, Uh, what's this one?

Speaker 28 (27:40):
Uh, just let me see that. Oh yes, this one
is called savage Dawn. That's more of the kind of
things you had in mind.

Speaker 17 (27:49):
Why that's very nice too. Now, if you were man,
mister Peevie, which of these colors would you prefer?

Speaker 29 (27:56):
I changed either train?

Speaker 17 (28:01):
But uh, which do you react to yourself? Personally?

Speaker 28 (28:06):
I don't know anything about these things, missus Ramsoon. I
just tell them I ladies come in here asking for
I'm sounna.

Speaker 8 (28:13):
I have to stop them.

Speaker 28 (28:14):
But I guess they're both good service for lipstoy.

Speaker 17 (28:18):
You're so old fish and mister Peed you probably think
any woman is a hussy if she even uses lipstay.

Speaker 14 (28:24):
Why wouldn't say that?

Speaker 17 (28:29):
I guess I'll just have to decide for myself. Man,
you know, I think I prefer savage down? Is that
wicked of me?

Speaker 6 (28:38):
Missus Ramsom.

Speaker 28 (28:39):
The way things are going these days, I don't know
how anybody's gonna tell what's good and what's bad. I
just try to break even myself. That'll be one dollar,
I say, y'all, and two chance.

Speaker 6 (28:56):
For the governor.

Speaker 17 (28:57):
Oh yes, I keep forgetting it up. Oh don't bother,
I'll just put it in behind by well, how god
by mister Pete.

Speaker 28 (29:05):
Your bamus is Rampson, and good luck for your lipstick, lipstick,
booby traps. Wonder who she's after this time?

Speaker 17 (29:29):
Good old Frock Martin always Addy, Oh, thank goodness, I'm
drash Rock Martin.

Speaker 19 (29:36):
Is that you down mile?

Speaker 17 (29:40):
She'll let the doors open, Go in the fall and
make yourself comfortable. Yeah, I'll be right now. Now do
I look all right? Here's anything showing? How's right? Well?
You'll have to do my lipstick? My new lipstick? Where
is it? I had it my hand? By no, no,
I took it out. Now where did me?

Speaker 30 (29:59):
My dog?

Speaker 17 (30:00):
What do you hurrying? Paul? Don't you remember what Mama said?
I always keep them waking?

Speaker 8 (30:18):
Where is she? Where is she? The name of heaven?
What's she doing up there? Forty five minutes by o'clock?

Speaker 31 (30:31):
Ye?

Speaker 8 (30:32):
Gods, I could be doing things. I could be at
the Jolly Boys right now. I could be home paying bills.
I could be reading a book even But no, Ad
o' facer said, just wait till she comes down here.

(30:52):
I'll give her a piece of my mind. Yes, By George, Alilah.

Speaker 17 (31:01):
Have I kept you waiting terribly long?

Speaker 8 (31:04):
Not at all. I just arrived practically.

Speaker 17 (31:07):
I'm so glad. I was afraid I might have kept
you waiting, don't uh?

Speaker 8 (31:12):
Thanks?

Speaker 17 (31:13):
Well, Aunt, you're glad to see me, aren't you glad?

Speaker 8 (31:16):
I'm by of course I am. Gosh.

Speaker 17 (31:19):
Then, but he is shitting way over there. Fall Oh,
that's better. I hate having to shout across the room,
don't you hate it?

Speaker 28 (31:30):
Yeah?

Speaker 17 (31:30):
We can talk nice and comfortably a whisper, even if
we had anything to wish for.

Speaker 8 (31:36):
I know something, how about a little kid?

Speaker 27 (31:39):
This? No?

Speaker 17 (31:40):
Come on, no, I'm very angry with you, rock Mark.

Speaker 8 (31:45):
What for?

Speaker 17 (31:45):
Because you never once wrote to me?

Speaker 8 (31:48):
All Seema, gosh, I've been busy, Leelah. You don't know
how busy I've been. I've been terribly busy. Really, I
kept intending to write to you, but I know you
were disy. That's right.

Speaker 17 (31:58):
Well, it doesn't really matter, she is shock Martin, because
if you had written to me, I should probably just
have torn the letter up. What too busy to read it?

Speaker 8 (32:11):
I George, you've got a great sense of humor, he left.
That's what I always say. As long as the girl's
got a sense of humor, I don't care if she's well,
that's the main thing. A sense of humor.

Speaker 17 (32:20):
You don't care if she's what?

Speaker 8 (32:22):
Shrock mart Nothing? What kind of summer did you have, Leela?
How was Savannah? Did you have fun?

Speaker 1 (32:27):
Well?

Speaker 17 (32:27):
Yes and no. Was all terribly complicated. I'll tell you
about it sometimes.

Speaker 8 (32:32):
What's the matter with it? Right now?

Speaker 17 (32:33):
Right now, I'd rather forget. Oh that's what I came
back up here for to forget.

Speaker 8 (32:39):
Forget?

Speaker 16 (32:39):
Who what his name is?

Speaker 17 (32:42):
Lightfoot?

Speaker 1 (32:42):
Deprive?

Speaker 8 (32:47):
Lightfoot?

Speaker 27 (32:48):
Oh?

Speaker 17 (32:49):
Shrock Martin? Why don't things ever work out?

Speaker 8 (32:52):
Why doesn't what work out? Who is this guy? What's
this all about?

Speaker 17 (32:55):
It was just one of those things.

Speaker 21 (32:56):
I guess.

Speaker 17 (32:57):
He was engaged to my very best friend, the girl
I was visiting all this time, so naturally there was
nothing I could do about him.

Speaker 8 (33:04):
Did you try rock mart.

Speaker 17 (33:06):
And she was my very best friend. The worst of
it was I found out he was in love with
me too, terribly in love. That's why I cut my
visit short.

Speaker 8 (33:17):
Cut it short. You were down there three months. I
thought you were coming back the first of August.

Speaker 17 (33:22):
Well, anyway, that's why I've come back to try to forget.

Speaker 8 (33:26):
Well, you've come to the right place. Leader you want
to forget it, I'll be glad to help you. Let's
start right now.

Speaker 17 (33:33):
As if I could ever forget life foot the pree Yes,
Oh well, I guess it was just one of those
things that could.

Speaker 8 (33:40):
Never be sure forget it? But you want to feel
sad for Leelah? I'm here. Why I gave up an
evening with a jolly boy just to be here with
you tonight?

Speaker 22 (33:47):
Oh?

Speaker 1 (33:47):
Did you rock mart Na?

Speaker 17 (33:49):
Gee? Sweez?

Speaker 8 (33:50):
Yeah, I could be playing poker right now.

Speaker 17 (33:54):
Oh, Rock Martin, You're so understanding.

Speaker 8 (33:57):
I can be a lot more understanding than this.

Speaker 17 (33:59):
You. I'd be needing you this evening. You will help
me forget, won't you really?

Speaker 1 (34:07):
Rock Martin?

Speaker 8 (34:08):
What was that mean?

Speaker 32 (34:09):
Oh?

Speaker 17 (34:10):
No, no, I thought I heard a shoound out.

Speaker 8 (34:12):
I didn't hear anything.

Speaker 17 (34:13):
Sounded like prowlers on the poem.

Speaker 8 (34:15):
Don't you worry, Leila, I'm here.

Speaker 17 (34:17):
Oh it's so wonderful to have a man around the house.

Speaker 8 (34:21):
Leila. Now how about it? Huh A little kiss?

Speaker 17 (34:24):
Do you always have to ask?

Speaker 29 (34:30):
Don't move?

Speaker 8 (34:31):
Why you hold me tight? You surely boy?

Speaker 4 (34:45):
All right, fellas, that's very funny and I'll get out
of here.

Speaker 8 (34:50):
You listen, you, fellows, do you want me to call
the police? Slave?

Speaker 33 (35:02):
Do you.

Speaker 8 (35:03):
I apologize. I don't know what's gotten into them. Off
there and get real.

Speaker 17 (35:06):
Oh don't send them boy, please, that would be terrible. Well,
I think it's delightful to be shanated like this. I'm
my first evening home. I think it's very flattering. Let
me speak to them, won't you gentlemen?

Speaker 27 (35:22):
Come in?

Speaker 17 (35:23):
But see you?

Speaker 8 (35:24):
Oh? No offense, home man, just a little joke on
the commissioner.

Speaker 17 (35:27):
Oh gracious, I should say not come on in and mister.

Speaker 28 (35:31):
T and if he has got me into it's mister Janson.
I gets on my way home.

Speaker 17 (35:36):
Oh, I'm glad you came.

Speaker 24 (35:39):
Horror, Welcome homely.

Speaker 17 (35:41):
Oh, horror, I'm glad to see.

Speaker 16 (35:43):
It's good to see you live.

Speaker 4 (35:45):
I would have mensured at the airport if our fat
friend here hadn't played me a dirty quick.

Speaker 8 (35:50):
I resent that I'm not fat. Have you got even
with him? Judge?

Speaker 4 (35:53):
Oh, missus Ransom?

Speaker 6 (35:54):
You know mister Monsoon high.

Speaker 8 (35:55):
And missus Ransom. How's it going?

Speaker 16 (35:57):
Close the door?

Speaker 4 (35:58):
Floyd? You were the last one?

Speaker 8 (36:00):
Yes?

Speaker 2 (36:00):
Where were you brought up in a burn?

Speaker 4 (36:02):
Oh?

Speaker 8 (36:02):
I'm sorry?

Speaker 17 (36:03):
Oh well, I just think it was wonderful about you
boys to come over like this. I'm so flighted. I
was telling Trock Mard. It reminds me of Mardy Gral
when all the men go around Serenad and the girls. Now,
if mister Peebe were just wearing a funny face, that's
what the one he's got on.

Speaker 4 (36:21):
Holy kidding, pee say, that's an idea. Why don't we
surnay the lady as long as we're here?

Speaker 8 (36:26):
Yeah?

Speaker 16 (36:26):
Why not sing?

Speaker 8 (36:28):
I'd love to hear we do pretty good home on
the range? Fellows, how about a commissioner? You take the lead?

Speaker 4 (36:33):
No, come on, commissioner, do sing trock mod please?

Speaker 8 (36:38):
No?

Speaker 17 (36:39):
Why not? I'll play the piano for.

Speaker 8 (36:40):
Are you hello on too?

Speaker 24 (36:43):
All right?

Speaker 8 (36:43):
Boy?

Speaker 16 (36:43):
You take the lead?

Speaker 24 (36:44):
Well do we see?

Speaker 8 (36:45):
Well, let's see there is a cavern in No?

Speaker 29 (36:57):
Oh, the more I fare tonight?

Speaker 8 (37:00):
Ain't along the wall? No? No, no, that's terrible. What's
terrible about everything? I don't like the song. I don't
like the way you sing it.

Speaker 4 (37:11):
Well, you know so much.

Speaker 8 (37:12):
Let's hear you sing something and while we're about it,
I don't like you fellas coming over here busting in
like this?

Speaker 16 (37:16):
Did you take a joke?

Speaker 8 (37:17):
Boys? Boys?

Speaker 4 (37:19):
I remember there's a lady present. Let's be jolly boys,
shall we? After all, this is supposed to be a
tribute to the fair Sex.

Speaker 8 (37:25):
Right, it's a tribute to the fair Sex.

Speaker 16 (37:27):
See how about I dream.

Speaker 17 (37:30):
Of Genie with a life. I love that one, Horras,
That's one of my very favorites.

Speaker 8 (37:36):
Dou sing, Yeah, Genie, I dream Just a minute, please,
just one minute. If you're gonna sing, for Heaven's sake,
let somebody sing the song. Who can sing it?

Speaker 34 (37:46):
Add a boy?

Speaker 30 (37:47):
Comes a boy?

Speaker 8 (37:50):
Yeah, okay, I'll do this Leland and see if we
can repair the damage. Oh dream beam love Leela. Yeah yeah,
with the live brown hair born like her saver on

(38:11):
the song, or she her drincking where the ries sees
bl happy as the day sees see her. Many were

(38:34):
the wild notes, her merry voice would pour.

Speaker 4 (38:40):
Many were the life birds that war.

Speaker 8 (38:45):
Both them are.

Speaker 30 (38:48):
Har dream love Meila with.

Speaker 6 (38:55):
Brown hair, long.

Speaker 2 (39:00):
Lo the great kilder sleeve will be back again in

(39:32):
just a moment. There's a well known saying that names
make news, and a few days ago this change in
a time honored name made news in.

Speaker 8 (39:40):
The food world.

Speaker 2 (39:41):
It was an announcement that the Craft Cheese Company has
changed its name to Craft Foods Company.

Speaker 8 (39:46):
And here's the reason.

Speaker 2 (39:48):
Throughout forty years, Craft has built a reputation as maker
of some of the world's finest cheese and cheese foods.
But over the years Craft has created other top quality
food products.

Speaker 22 (39:58):
So the new company name is design to.

Speaker 6 (40:00):
Include all these quality foods.

Speaker 2 (40:02):
And of course one of these important foods is park Margarine,
the delicious spread for bread that's a favorite of millions
because of its superior quality and its fresh, delicate flavor.
So in the future look for the new name Craft
Foods Company on each package of delicious economical Parkue Mordarin.

Speaker 8 (40:41):
That's a blend sky and the moon Lie on the
Gold Madre. She's the sweetheart of six other guys. Good Nightly,

(41:06):
Lincoln Night, everybody.

Speaker 2 (41:11):
A Great Kilder Slave is played by Harold Perry. It
is written by John Wheaton, I'm Sam Moore and music
is by Jack Nachon. This is John Lang speaking for
the Craft Foods Company and inviting you to listen and
again next week for the further adventures of the Great
Kilder Slaves.

Speaker 8 (41:36):
You're the children in your family like cheese, and you
can just bet they like Papstead. It's so rich and
mellow cheddar cheese flavor so easy to digest. Papstead is
a cheese food that contains the nourishing food values of milk.
And it's simply delicious bread on bread or on crackers
or melted into a luscious cheese sauce for macaroni. And

(41:56):
now the ration points are no longer required. You want
to buy both delicious varieties golden PAVs Debt and pamental
PABs deat Ask for Pavstat the delicious cheddar cheese food
when you shop tomorrow.

Speaker 35 (42:16):
This is the National Broadcasting Company, six thirty Eastern Time
on Sunday, September twenty third, nineteen forty five, The Great
Gyilders Sleep.

Speaker 7 (42:26):
We'll go a little later in the NBC scheduled at
eight o'clock for an episode of The Charlie McCarthy Show
in a few minutes. But first we're going to take
a look at the news. But first I'm gonna want
you to listen to this. Would you please?

Speaker 18 (42:44):
Do you know how old the school building in your
community is. If it's over twenty five years old, the
chances are that it's woefully inadic. Join with the groups
in your community working for better school conditions. Remember better
schools build a stronger America.

Speaker 7 (43:03):
You know, I had to get over a lot of
critics of this show who always said Ali does his
yap yap yapp. I gets one of the radio shows. Well,
there are lots of places you can go here the
radio shows. This radio program is not about just the
old radio shows. It is about history and built around

(43:23):
the days. And that's what we're gonna do here is
take just a quick look at the newspapers from Sunday,
September twenty third, nineteen forty five. Wholesale arrest of big
shots who masterminded Japan's whole war effort has been ordered
by the US government in a move to smash Japanese
militarism and alternationalism entirely. Along with this, the government has

(43:48):
directed that if democratically minded Japanese start armed re bolt
against their overlords, General Douglas MacArthur's occupation forces are not
to interfere except to protect themselves and serve other occupation aims.
Millions of gallons of gasoline destined for Eastern motorists choked

(44:10):
off at the source yesterday as the Oil Workers International
Union crippled petroleum refineries in three great production areas. Petroleum
industry and officials said at least a third of the
nation's gas production had been shut off almost hourly. New
labor flare ups closing off other production plants. A strike

(44:33):
boat in ninety six General Motors Corporation plants throughout the
nation asked by the United Auto Workers in a petition
to the National Labor Relations Board. The union's demand for
a thirty percent wage increase topped the list of issues
which Walter P. Ruther, the UAWCIO vice president, said were

(44:53):
in dispute. Rother estimated that three hundred and twenty five
thousand workers would be affected if strike was called. The
Army yesterday released a master redemption schedule for the European Theater,
promising all enlisted men with sixty or more points that
they would be homeward bound by New Year's It also

(45:15):
disclosed that by late spring, US occupation forces will have
been reduced to seven divisions slated for prolonged overseas duty.
An all male jury of farmers and businessmen spared dashing
Lieutenant Samuel cg Apps from the electric chair that sent

(45:35):
him to prison. Instead, Judge A. L. Gaston pronounced the
mandatory sentence upon the man the one impressive army officer
after the jury convicted him a murder but recommended mercy.
Senator Edgar A. Brown, noted criminal lawyer employed by the
wealthy Apes family, entered a motion for a new trial.

(45:56):
The arguments on the motion will be heard at a
later day. The US sixth Army prepared to go ashore
in force on Kshu Island today as General MacArthur ordered
the arrest of General Nobuki Abe, former Governor General of
Korea and the second highest Japanese Asiatic military commander, placed

(46:19):
on his war criminal list. The London Daily Express said
yesterday an effective defense against the atomic bomb has been perfected.
The device, based on the principles of British radar, German
rockets and American fuses, is capable of destroying planes or
rockets carrying atomic explosives at any height. The key to

(46:42):
the new defense is the radio proximity fuze, the American
invention that beat the B one weapons and brought down
hundreds of Japanese suicide planes. It'll make Akhak of the
future one hundred percent effective. The row over Japanese occupation
policies and disclosures that the Japanese code was sold before

(47:04):
the Pearl Harbor attack yesterday, sharp and political attention onto Republicans.
They are General Douglas MacArthur, who will continue to list
him and Washington continues to list him among presidential possibilities
despite anything the sixty five year old general may say.
Governor Thomas E. Dewey of New York apparently is being

(47:25):
groomed by supporters for re election and a subsequent presidential
bid as a man who would rather be a patriot
than president. Aircraft carriers will be outmoded like hoopskirts, only
when planes can fly around the world and back again
on a pint of something or other, not according to
a Navy spokesman, John L. Sullivan, the Assistant Secretary of

(47:47):
the Navy for Air said that day's not here yet
and wars have to be thought with something more formidable
than the Sunday supplement. Doctor Ada Bimco, polished Jewis, who
survived twenty months in concentration camps, testified that she thought
Joseph Kramer, chief defendant in the Belsan War crimes trials,

(48:09):
kick and beat sick prisoners selected under his direction for
the Gash Chamber. The Soviet Union reported yesterday to have
refused to discuss an American proposal which has the personal
backing of President Truman, or the internationalization of Europe's inland waterways,

(48:30):
the proposal made in connection with the Balkan Peace Treaties,
now under consideration by the Foreign Ministries Council. Those just
few the today's news headlines from the newspapers of Sunday,
September twenty third, nineteen forty five. And on your radio.
Up next, we'll hear something else funny, which is Charlie McCarthy.

Speaker 23 (49:00):
Americans will heed history's lessons. Throughout history, surprise has had
a leading role in military disasters. Today, an anime capable
of surprise air attack could leave chaos in his wake.
That's why you should be in the Civilian Ground Observer
Corps volunteering a few hours a week to guard our skies.

Speaker 14 (49:18):
Be a ground observer. Contact your local Civilian Defense office.

Speaker 7 (49:22):
Radar still being deployed, so you still needed those civil
defense watchers for a long long time into the fifties.
Right now, the Charlie McCarthy Show with Edgar Bergen. This
goes back to that same Sunday eight o'clock Eastern Time,
September twenty third, nineteen forty five. The guest Anne Baxter.

Speaker 15 (49:50):
It's the Charlie McCarthy Show. This is Ken Carpenter, Ladies
and gentlemen, greeting you on behalf of that Gebergan, Charlie McCarthy,
Ryan Hobble and his orchestra, Aneta Gordon, Pat Patrick, Mortimer
Snurt and our two special guests for this Sunday, the
lovely An Baxter and Keenan Wynne, one of the stars

(50:13):
soon to be seen and met the Golden Mayer's week
Ound at the Waldorf. And here's that Gebergen and Charlie McCarthy.

Speaker 30 (50:27):
Steve Reagan.

Speaker 36 (50:27):
Isn't it exciting about us going to New York?

Speaker 21 (50:30):
It certainly is, Charlie. Now, I've just about finished packing
my bags to see. All I need is my Coleman
brush and I'll be ready. Yeah, you're ready now. Oh,
and I mustn't forget to pick up my tickets at
the Oak Edgar.

Speaker 15 (50:43):
If you're looking for tickets and i'm your man, well.

Speaker 21 (50:46):
You are, Dean, and you mean you're a pullman Tedler.

Speaker 15 (50:49):
Yeah, I'm taking my brother's place at the Union Station. Yeah, well,
what no word?

Speaker 21 (50:52):
Are you doing that for it?

Speaker 37 (50:53):
Keenan.

Speaker 32 (50:54):
I like to meet people.

Speaker 15 (50:55):
I like the excitement. I like to pick up a
few extra buns.

Speaker 37 (50:59):
Yeah.

Speaker 15 (51:00):
Say Charlie, how would you like to work with me?

Speaker 30 (51:01):
Y'all?

Speaker 21 (51:03):
Y'all get away, bud.

Speaker 15 (51:04):
No, yeah, pleasant work you do?

Speaker 37 (51:07):
Get going?

Speaker 38 (51:08):
Get going?

Speaker 21 (51:09):
And Baxter is helping me get my hat.

Speaker 16 (51:14):
What are we waiting for that, Charlie, Charlie.

Speaker 21 (51:17):
Here comes your little girlfriend, Anita Gordon.

Speaker 39 (51:20):
Oh, Charlie, is it true that you're going to New York?

Speaker 16 (51:23):
Yes, it is, but you're not going to leave me?

Speaker 38 (51:27):
Are you and me? Leave you?

Speaker 8 (51:30):
Silly girl?

Speaker 39 (51:32):
I don't understand.

Speaker 4 (51:33):
Well I'll explain you. See what Charlie means that you
are going with us?

Speaker 8 (51:38):
I have you?

Speaker 21 (51:39):
Oh Charlie, come here, please, not in front of all
these people.

Speaker 39 (51:46):
Oh just imagine New York.

Speaker 21 (51:48):
Yeah, I'm so happy.

Speaker 25 (51:49):
I could sing.

Speaker 16 (51:50):
We'll go around here and sing.

Speaker 40 (51:51):
Anita, she was kind of distance in a charming word.

Speaker 41 (52:11):
He was so fir distance.

Speaker 38 (52:15):
It's began.

Speaker 41 (52:17):
One day.

Speaker 38 (52:20):
In the middle of May, he met a gal named June.

Speaker 39 (52:27):
Took Cross July.

Speaker 41 (52:30):
And eat an honest, smooth.

Speaker 38 (52:34):
And apt. He kept admiring her charm, and.

Speaker 39 (52:44):
They were locked in each other.

Speaker 38 (52:48):
From November to day.

Speaker 41 (52:52):
To run around began.

Speaker 17 (52:56):
February and mar he was a worried man.

Speaker 38 (53:03):
It wasn't delay that she said okay, and.

Speaker 37 (53:11):
They were man.

Speaker 41 (53:17):
In the middle of May.

Speaker 38 (53:22):
From November Jay the run around, the jam February.

Speaker 16 (53:30):
And mar.

Speaker 17 (53:33):
He was a worried man.

Speaker 41 (53:35):
It wasn't delay that she said, okay and the man
in the middle of May, in the middle of May,

(53:59):
in the middle of me, in the middle of man.

Speaker 16 (54:24):
You're mister, yes, lly, hi, yes, I just wanna see
how how.

Speaker 21 (54:30):
Nice you look today? Thank you, joby, thank you.

Speaker 16 (54:34):
You look still with well, you look so well groomed.
You look still and shall we say posters sir?

Speaker 21 (54:42):
Yeah, yeah, well I I believe I do have.

Speaker 42 (54:45):
An air of distinction.

Speaker 4 (54:47):
Okay, wait a minute now, now, wait a minute, job yeah, no,
you're not after anything, are you. Well, I've i've uh,
for example, money will it's strange that you should mention that.

Speaker 36 (54:59):
Yes, as a matter of thank I am in an.

Speaker 21 (55:03):
Embarrassing position for the more, for the more. Yeah, yeah, yeah,
you see, I.

Speaker 16 (55:10):
Got caught with my finances down.

Speaker 4 (55:11):
Yes, well that's very interesting, but why bother to tell
me about it.

Speaker 36 (55:17):
Well, I just thought that you might can leave me
the lend of a miles lone.

Speaker 4 (55:25):
I thought it is.

Speaker 21 (55:29):
You thought, yes, all right, sat dreamer that I am.
So you're over the barrel again. I missed the berg,
and this time I'm wearing it. Well, young man, instead

(55:51):
of hounding me, why don't you borrow a little from
your piggy bank? Because that little piggy has none, none,
not a sow. Well, then you should earn some money,
after all. Don't you think that you're old enough to
go to work?

Speaker 16 (56:12):
Well, I suppose you know that I could ask you
the same question, Charley. You should make a practice of
saving twenty percent of your.

Speaker 21 (56:27):
Allowance each week. I don't make that much.

Speaker 4 (56:30):
Oh, perhaps I can illustrate my point a little better
by by telling you.

Speaker 21 (56:35):
The story of any top fable.

Speaker 16 (56:38):
Oh, must we do it the hard way.

Speaker 21 (56:42):
It's the fable, of course, of the grasshopper and the ant.

Speaker 30 (56:45):
Uh huh.

Speaker 21 (56:46):
Now, tell me what do you know about the habits
of the ant? Well, frankly, not much. I haven't been
in touch with the underground lately. I'm well. Particular ants
that I'm speaking of was very industrious. He worked hard
all the time. I hate him already. You see, ants

(57:11):
never waste a minute. Oh no, no, Well, and how.

Speaker 36 (57:14):
About all the time they spend it picnic?

Speaker 21 (57:16):
Well all right, yes, Well, what I'm trying to point
out is that all summer long this ant gathered food,
he did, yes, and he hid it away for the future.

Speaker 30 (57:32):
Well, the little.

Speaker 21 (57:33):
Sneak, that's parting, all right. The grasshopper just took it easy,
chirping and hopping around all summer. Yeah, yes, well, last
string along with a grasshopper. He's got personality. I like
him the times he can.

Speaker 16 (57:47):
Spit to that of juicy.

Speaker 4 (57:55):
Not only did the grasshopper loaf all the time, but
he made fun of the ants for working.

Speaker 21 (58:00):
Yes, and so the ant said. One day, the ant said, beware, beware,
I wouldn't do that. D you know, don't strain our voice.
All right, the ant said to the grasshopper, And I

(58:20):
like this part of it. Well, I'm glad it's nothing
good about here. Beware, beware, winter winter will come, Winter
will come, and you will be sorry. You'll be sorry
that you didn't prepare. I have spoken, ladies and gentlemen.

(58:42):
You see before you the remains of a frustrated actor
all right, and throughing up winter came it always does.
Then it was a different story man high time too.
I was getting pretty thick of this one or no

(59:04):
cover of the ground, and the grasshopper was without food,
and of course, being without food, he had nothing to eat. No, gad,
what fay there's a sloppy hunko logical. There wasn't a leaf,

(59:28):
There wasn't a blade of grass to eat, nothing for
this poor grasshopper.

Speaker 31 (59:32):
Well, couldn't we.

Speaker 14 (59:33):
Drop in something by parachute?

Speaker 8 (59:36):
You see?

Speaker 21 (59:37):
The ant ants produced in food?

Speaker 4 (59:39):
And of course he was starving.

Speaker 21 (59:41):
Oh no, this that happen, Yes, slowly, slowly starving.

Speaker 15 (59:47):
Isn't there a trust of bread in the house.

Speaker 4 (59:49):
There's something up.

Speaker 15 (59:50):
It was the grashopper's own fault.

Speaker 21 (59:52):
You shouldn't feel sorry for him.

Speaker 16 (59:53):
Well, I can't help it. We were getting to be
such good friend, the.

Speaker 32 (59:57):
Little chest a.

Speaker 8 (01:00:00):
I hope that you will be wiser than the grasshopper
in the future. This fable teaches us a lesson in yes,
and the lesson is this, the ants work hard, persevere
and save, and as a reward.

Speaker 21 (01:00:13):
Somebody steps on him.

Speaker 16 (01:00:14):
No, no, no clas d d T gets him.

Speaker 30 (01:00:18):
No, no m.

Speaker 21 (01:00:48):
I'd like to buy some magazines to read on the train. Well,
if it isn't Mortimer snur Will, but raw almost a version.
Well you mean to say that you're running this magazine? Said, uh,
you know, he know, But well you're you're quite an
enterprising young man for sure.

Speaker 14 (01:01:07):
Y yep, yep, yep.

Speaker 8 (01:01:14):
At good work.

Speaker 21 (01:01:15):
You're I got talking in my head befide brains.

Speaker 8 (01:01:19):
All right, yeah, well.

Speaker 21 (01:01:21):
Well I'm glad to do business with you. Now, let
me see what would I like to get to read?
What have you got here?

Speaker 14 (01:01:26):
Well, if we we got.

Speaker 8 (01:01:28):
Got good housebreaking magazine?

Speaker 21 (01:01:31):
No, uh, you want readers Indigestion.

Speaker 4 (01:01:34):
No, it's the it's a September issue, September issue, September Hillmer.

Speaker 21 (01:01:45):
Oh yeah, September.

Speaker 14 (01:01:46):
Hell yeah, that's right.

Speaker 21 (01:01:47):
You know that's the name of quite a well known month.

Speaker 8 (01:01:51):
Yes, I know.

Speaker 16 (01:01:58):
What you want.

Speaker 21 (01:01:58):
Well, i'd like something to read on train.

Speaker 14 (01:02:00):
We'll aursue you, we'll train you google.

Speaker 21 (01:02:02):
Well, the chiefs all about some indie stories.

Speaker 14 (01:02:15):
You know you amuse me?

Speaker 21 (01:02:16):
Monument will Yeah, after all, there's only one monument Snort.

Speaker 8 (01:02:20):
They no, pretty scarcel girl.

Speaker 21 (01:02:23):
Yes, I think you're right. I got a detective storage.

Speaker 14 (01:02:26):
You have is it good?

Speaker 21 (01:02:28):
Well, you like it and you've read it.

Speaker 30 (01:02:31):
I'm almost up to the beginning, you know I do.

Speaker 21 (01:02:34):
Uh huh, Well, I'll tell you. I'll take this one
and I'll think this an over here and here's my money,
bas Burton, here's your change.

Speaker 27 (01:02:43):
Now.

Speaker 21 (01:02:43):
Wait a minute, Wait a minute, Wait a minute. Hey,
you didn't give me the right change for it.

Speaker 14 (01:02:47):
Non touring must Burgin.

Speaker 21 (01:02:49):
I can't correct mistake yourself.

Speaker 30 (01:02:51):
Do you leave the window?

Speaker 21 (01:02:52):
Well, you gave me a quarter too much, torys too bad.
Learn you to be more careful next time. How can
you be so stupid?

Speaker 16 (01:03:02):
You will?

Speaker 15 (01:03:03):
It ain't something you get out of books. No, no, here,
Charlie is a little proage. I needa garden singing. I'll

(01:03:25):
buy that dream.

Speaker 38 (01:03:30):
Imagine me with my head on, and you with your
list getting fall.

Speaker 39 (01:03:43):
A a handful of mod and a sweet marrow to.

Speaker 27 (01:03:52):
That.

Speaker 38 (01:03:54):
Imagine me in a dog riding slower, and you thank
you the for my dollery.

Speaker 25 (01:04:07):
A church full of fools and those last minute joy.

Speaker 27 (01:04:16):
The breath.

Speaker 38 (01:04:19):
For honeymoon in Pyro in a brand new artle Gyro.

Speaker 37 (01:04:25):
Then home by rocket.

Speaker 3 (01:04:27):
In a weed.

Speaker 38 (01:04:30):
Will set down near Dallas in a little plastic palace.
It's not as crazy as you see. Imagine me on
our first Donna first with someone like you in the nursey.

(01:04:57):
It doesn't sound there, and if it can be hard,

(01:05:29):
imaginely one of first canafit.

Speaker 39 (01:05:36):
With someone like.

Speaker 25 (01:05:38):
You in the nursey.

Speaker 38 (01:05:43):
It doesn't sound the.

Speaker 39 (01:05:47):
And if it can be.

Speaker 43 (01:06:00):
A y'all attention, please train now, leaving on fact six

(01:06:32):
for noodles Arizona three winning West.

Speaker 30 (01:06:36):
Virginia, year born and lay born.

Speaker 4 (01:06:39):
And that's when I's a rod nag, Say Collie, Sharlie,
where are you?

Speaker 8 (01:06:45):
Oh?

Speaker 21 (01:06:46):
Yes, here, I am here, I am I.

Speaker 16 (01:06:47):
S you win.

Speaker 4 (01:06:48):
Say be a good little fellow and run out and
buy me another bottle of spring conic.

Speaker 21 (01:06:53):
Yeah, any kind of lateness, he's brother.

Speaker 15 (01:06:55):
Well, I just gotta have my spring Conic.

Speaker 30 (01:06:58):
Okay, lit, Look.

Speaker 4 (01:06:59):
I heard her fall over that, Jenny.

Speaker 24 (01:07:02):
Why do you take that stuff from my Disney spells?

Speaker 8 (01:07:06):
Oh?

Speaker 21 (01:07:06):
How often you have Disney spells?

Speaker 4 (01:07:08):
Every time I take it?

Speaker 5 (01:07:11):
Hello?

Speaker 14 (01:07:11):
Oh huh, I'm a new stenographer.

Speaker 16 (01:07:14):
Oh you're the newest.

Speaker 1 (01:07:15):
Well open my problem. But Charlie, you remember me?

Speaker 36 (01:07:20):
Oh sure sure, now that I see your face, Yes,
it's am Baxter. So you're the new stenographer. Huh, we're here,
take a letter or they're still they take a kiss.

Speaker 37 (01:07:36):
I take it easy.

Speaker 4 (01:07:37):
Oh no, don't let Charlie wear you, my dear, I
happen to be a b O doubles boss.

Speaker 8 (01:07:43):
Oh no, I am worried.

Speaker 4 (01:07:45):
Oh I've a girl, say, by the way's back.

Speaker 21 (01:07:48):
I forgot to ask what are your qualification?

Speaker 10 (01:07:52):
Are you blind?

Speaker 2 (01:07:54):
Where are you say?

Speaker 4 (01:07:57):
How many words can you type them?

Speaker 30 (01:07:58):
Innute?

Speaker 17 (01:07:59):
I talked to anyways fifteen?

Speaker 24 (01:08:02):
That's good?

Speaker 21 (01:08:02):
How she selling unusual? That's would take a letter a night, dear,
And I read that back, my dear.

Speaker 16 (01:08:11):
Yes, honey, Charlie, I've always wanted to work for a
railroad and you'll be long here too. That's what you do.
Your eyes, your eyes glistened like shining rails, and your
cheeks orange red as to box cars.

Speaker 19 (01:08:28):
What track do I leave on her.

Speaker 4 (01:08:32):
Rain?

Speaker 14 (01:08:33):
Now?

Speaker 43 (01:08:33):
Leaving on FRAC five for Home Mall, Toronzo, Mexico.

Speaker 8 (01:08:38):
City and New York.

Speaker 17 (01:08:40):
Right, it seems like a long way around to get
to New York.

Speaker 4 (01:08:44):
That's what I keep telling them.

Speaker 21 (01:08:45):
Say how soon, gentlemen, I want to buy a ticket
to New York.

Speaker 4 (01:08:52):
Why the drest?

Speaker 24 (01:08:53):
Oh it wasn't buy a ticket in the Yark.

Speaker 21 (01:08:56):
Well I've got to have a ticket. See my name
is Edgar Bergen.

Speaker 6 (01:08:58):
Listen by the people names.

Speaker 4 (01:09:01):
So you've got to take your turns just like nobody
else there.

Speaker 16 (01:09:05):
And I'll let you have an extra special rate on
a New York's ticket.

Speaker 21 (01:09:09):
Well, now that's nice of you, Charley.

Speaker 16 (01:09:10):
You mean I can ride for half their Yeah, if
you don't mind walking from omall?

Speaker 41 (01:09:15):
Well would you get me a ribbon for my tie
fighter Charlie.

Speaker 17 (01:09:19):
Well, of course I do.

Speaker 21 (01:09:20):
I say, I beg your pardon, but might I come
in and brow.

Speaker 41 (01:09:24):
Through your reservations?

Speaker 21 (01:09:26):
I said, just a minute. I believe I was here
first one.

Speaker 4 (01:09:30):
Stop insrupting, buddy, stop asrupting it back in line.

Speaker 21 (01:09:33):
I don't think you know anything about selly tickets. Anyone
who deals with you.

Speaker 4 (01:09:37):
Was a fool, I mean customer resolves right, I say,
young lady, I'd like to purchase a return ticket.

Speaker 39 (01:09:44):
A return ticket to where where did you come from?

Speaker 6 (01:09:47):
Well you must know that the stop brought me.

Speaker 21 (01:09:57):
We have a special today, ten dollars to a wall
Oh well I only.

Speaker 15 (01:10:01):
Have five dollars, so just give me a ticket to Waller.

Speaker 21 (01:10:06):
Miss Baxter please. Now, don't you really think that I've
waited long enough?

Speaker 27 (01:10:10):
But what is this I propose?

Speaker 14 (01:10:12):
No? No, no, it's about the tickets.

Speaker 36 (01:10:13):
Okay, I'm back with your rabbit.

Speaker 17 (01:10:15):
Oh thank you, Charlie.

Speaker 21 (01:10:16):
Please somebody what you have around here in the shape
of a pullman ticket?

Speaker 4 (01:10:20):
Well, we got an old beer check? No, say you? Yeah? Well,
stop pulling up the line. Don't you know there's a
war over come come back and back and back and
back and back.

Speaker 29 (01:10:31):
I say about that train for water?

Speaker 44 (01:10:33):
I want saints have you?

Speaker 21 (01:10:35):
Well, how about you on the aisle for Monday nights?

Speaker 4 (01:10:37):
And let me handle this, charle.

Speaker 21 (01:10:40):
Now I can give you a room with hot and
cold water is in the bedroom?

Speaker 4 (01:10:44):
No, but it's the next thing to it.

Speaker 14 (01:10:49):
I say that.

Speaker 2 (01:10:52):
Tell me this, would you? Does the engine smoke a lot?

Speaker 21 (01:10:56):
Yes? And it also choose.

Speaker 4 (01:11:01):
But I don't want to flame.

Speaker 15 (01:11:02):
But you know the last time I traveled, the frame
was five hours late.

Speaker 4 (01:11:05):
Oh you think that's bad these days? You're lucky if
it's facing the right way.

Speaker 14 (01:11:12):
All I say is that my train pulling out?

Speaker 16 (01:11:16):
Well, if it ain't, the station is backing up.

Speaker 30 (01:11:19):
Everybody.

Speaker 21 (01:11:21):
Now about my ticket to New York?

Speaker 40 (01:11:23):
All long?

Speaker 4 (01:11:24):
That's the seventies tickets you've got. It's people like you
that make people like you hate people like you.

Speaker 21 (01:11:30):
Yeah, but I I haven't. I haven't bought a ticket
here yet.

Speaker 32 (01:11:34):
Oh so I've been taking him on my back turn.

Speaker 21 (01:11:37):
Oh no, off, sunned out.

Speaker 15 (01:11:39):
I wait a minute, I could what's all the commotion.

Speaker 4 (01:11:43):
About, officer apprehend the chap's academic here?

Speaker 8 (01:11:54):
But I haven't done anything.

Speaker 21 (01:11:55):
Off, I've just been standing around here all day.

Speaker 8 (01:11:59):
An you'll come along with me.

Speaker 21 (01:12:01):
Yeah, but you can't arrest me. You see, I've got
to go to New York tomorrow.

Speaker 15 (01:12:04):
Well, we've got a little different tour arrange for you.
San Fernando, San Jose and San Quentin.

Speaker 16 (01:12:12):
Charlie.

Speaker 21 (01:12:12):
Aren't you going to say something?

Speaker 16 (01:12:14):
Sure? There again, don't forget to write.

Speaker 25 (01:12:29):
Yes, I'm mister promister Roman.

Speaker 37 (01:12:46):
I'm from and graduation dancer, a gossip assembly hall.

Speaker 41 (01:13:00):
On home.

Speaker 27 (01:13:03):
That all.

Speaker 37 (01:13:06):
I mister game, that times around at Miller div Orange
shocklate Shtal.

Speaker 39 (01:13:17):
With the whip cream fillers, the boy I promised I
would call.

Speaker 27 (01:13:27):
On home. That all.

Speaker 39 (01:13:33):
I miss the midnight services on Christmas Eve and the
jaw When Christmas morning came, I mister scramble for the
wishbone every Sunday.

Speaker 8 (01:13:51):
And the Big Times giving the bag.

Speaker 25 (01:14:02):
Mister toy, I had to set the table.

Speaker 38 (01:14:09):
I'm slow reason my mother name when she was table.

Speaker 39 (01:14:17):
The fragrance son fires in the fall.

Speaker 25 (01:14:23):
I'm holyday.

Speaker 5 (01:14:26):
That I mister time use, I had to set the table.

Speaker 25 (01:15:00):
I'm the school of my mother.

Speaker 39 (01:15:05):
When she was able, the fragrant bonfires in the ball.

Speaker 3 (01:15:19):
Home.

Speaker 16 (01:15:58):
Come in, Yeah, a friend, Uh, I'm here today. Yes,
I'm here today, and I'm sorry. Well, no, I'm not
exactly sorry either, but I beg your pardon. Well I
don't either really beg your pardon because I haven't done
anything yet.

Speaker 21 (01:16:16):
When you came into Junie.

Speaker 8 (01:16:19):
Pardon me.

Speaker 21 (01:16:20):
But just who are you?

Speaker 16 (01:16:21):
Well, my name is Earthel Twain, Yeah, Verspheawing, and I'm
please h and I'm Fred Allen's West Coast a representative,
Fred Allen. Yeah, Fred Allen, And I think I have
a peachy idea. I understand you're going to New York.

Speaker 21 (01:16:39):
Yes we are, yes, yes, oh that's peak.

Speaker 14 (01:16:41):
Yeah.

Speaker 21 (01:16:42):
And what's that got to do with mister Allen?

Speaker 16 (01:16:44):
Though, well, I could arrange for him to do against
appearance on your show. You must admit you as an
extremely comic.

Speaker 21 (01:16:50):
So myam, oh must we.

Speaker 16 (01:16:54):
Well why it wasn't he on.

Speaker 24 (01:16:55):
The air last year?

Speaker 4 (01:16:56):
Then?

Speaker 24 (01:16:56):
Oh last year?

Speaker 16 (01:16:57):
Yes, well, mister Allen has just scar and uh well
no he doesn't exactly have cast either, but.

Speaker 21 (01:17:03):
But yes he does do. Yes, they up your mind.

Speaker 16 (01:17:06):
He has cat yet and he doesn't have to work.

Speaker 21 (01:17:09):
Uh huh no, if they don't give him a job,
he does not? Well, just just what does mister Allen do?

Speaker 14 (01:17:16):
What? What?

Speaker 17 (01:17:17):
What?

Speaker 21 (01:17:17):
What does he do?

Speaker 8 (01:17:19):
Why?

Speaker 16 (01:17:19):
He juggles and he does funny way that says saying
not so oh yeah, and that is not and he
talks through his narrows without moving his nostrils.

Speaker 45 (01:17:33):
That's my band.

Speaker 8 (01:17:34):
Now.

Speaker 21 (01:17:34):
How much would it cost to have Bred Allen on
our show next week? How much would it cost not
to have him? No, no, Charlie, I think we should
be fair about this. Let's invite Fred Alham to be
on our show next Sunday.

Speaker 16 (01:17:45):
Yeah, and because he has so.

Speaker 21 (01:17:46):
Much money, let's not embarrass him by offering him any salary.
That's good yet, now you wouldn't want to embarrassed mister Allen,
would you, mister Queen.

Speaker 41 (01:17:54):
I embarrassed him?

Speaker 21 (01:17:55):
Oh no, good, good, He's on our show next week
is off.

Speaker 16 (01:18:00):
Say oh yes, oh, goodie, goodie gum drop.

Speaker 21 (01:18:04):
May I get it?

Speaker 4 (01:18:05):
Yes?

Speaker 32 (01:18:05):
Oh?

Speaker 15 (01:18:05):
Thank you?

Speaker 4 (01:18:07):
Hello?

Speaker 21 (01:18:09):
Oh yes, mister Allen.

Speaker 30 (01:18:10):
Oh oh you do?

Speaker 4 (01:18:12):
I did?

Speaker 38 (01:18:14):
I am?

Speaker 30 (01:18:15):
Oh?

Speaker 16 (01:18:15):
Well fine? Wow, mister Berg, could you use a West
Coast representative. I've always thought you were the funniest man
on the radio.

Speaker 8 (01:18:29):
Oh is that so?

Speaker 21 (01:18:31):
The worm has turned and it looks just as bad
from both ends.

Speaker 16 (01:18:36):
Oh that's very funny, Yes, very funny. Ever since I
came in here, you you've had your laugh and you've
tormented me with your flurs and your gibes and your innuendo.

Speaker 21 (01:18:43):
I didn't wind.

Speaker 16 (01:18:44):
Oh yes, you did too, innuendo and it's very clever.
And I want you to know I've got a good
mad on right now, before you get me into a tissy,
I'm going to say goodbye, good.

Speaker 15 (01:18:51):
Bomb Ancarty one at Oliver will have a dark guest
bright hours.

Speaker 30 (01:19:08):
We're becoming Toyoka.

Speaker 15 (01:19:10):
You're no Radio Cudy.

Speaker 7 (01:19:36):
An Armed Forces recording of the Charlie McCarthy Show eight
o'clock Eastern Time on Sunday, September twenty third, nineteen forty five.
The rest of the lineup that night for NBC was
The Great Guilder Sleeve at six thirty, the Wayne King
Orchestra at seven, the Fitch Bandwagon, Summer Show, Mysteries, Mystery

(01:19:57):
Show with Dick Powell, and then Charlie McCarry, then eight
thirty Tommy Dorsey Manhattan and Merry Go Round, the American
Album of Music, and at ten o'clock the gke All
Girl Orchestra, and then meet Me at Parky's swith park
your carcass and if you don't know who that is
and You're lucky. CBS six o'clock had Ozzy and Harriet,

(01:20:22):
Baby Snooks, The Thin Man, Blondie, The Beulah Show, The
Crime Doctor, and then radio Readers, Digest, the Star, Theater,
Tape It, Take It or Leave It, and We the People.
So they were really busy as well. Let's see, you
didn't have a lot of the evening shows, and of

(01:20:46):
course we were in football season, so a lot of
mutual shows were preempted by football and baseball playoffs and
the light but NBC still had Excuse Me Mutual had
The Shadow at five, Nick Carter at five thirty, Quick
as a Flash, a game show at six, and then

(01:21:08):
then they went in a lot of other shows, Gabriel
Heater and Double or Nothing and the Brownstone Theater. Let's see,
do I have anything from ABC? I really don't, so
that'll give you an idea what was on the radio
course you had a lot of other religious shows and
suys because Sundays on independent stations ended up doing a

(01:21:32):
lot of religious shows. Okay, we roll on here now
on Classic Radio Theater with wyattos By telling you what's
coming up on Wednesday show, and we will have me
back to drama with a lot of crime, although we
will have some romance. Let George Do It starring Bob
Bailey from nineteen fifty one, The Whistler from nineteen forty
five and The Man Who Died Twice. Bill Johnstone is

(01:21:54):
The Shadow, dead Men Talk from nineteen thirty nine, Romance
The Winds of June starring Bick Parrin and Virgini greg
from nineteen fifty five, Thursday, Peter Laurie, Mystery in the Air,
Crime and Punishment, Howard dupp Is, Sam Spade Yours Truly,
Johnny Dollar, Bob Bailey and The Five Down Matter, and

(01:22:15):
Night Watch. On Friday, we will have the Lux Radio
Theater a preview of The Lomon Abner Show and you
bet your life they've moved from an half a quarter
hour to an hour. Oh the Lux Radio Theater, Jack Benny,
Mary Livingston and Seven Keys to bald Plate. Saturday, we'll
have Westerns, Gun Smokes, the six Shooter, Have Gun Will Travel,

(01:22:37):
and the Challenge of the Yukon. On Sunday, George Burns
and Gracey Allen, a nineteen fifty two episode of The
Aldridge Family starring Bobby Ellis, Father Knows Best and the
Jack Parr Show. On Monday, we will have Yours Truly,
Johnny Dollar and Suspense from nineteen fifty seven, Wanted from
nineteen fifty The Whistler, and we will have the return

(01:23:01):
of Claudia and David. And then next Tuesday we will
have Westerns again. We will have Gun Smoking, Fort Laramie
from nineteen fifty six, Melody Ranch from nineteen fifty and
Tails of the Texas Rangers from nineteen fifty And also
next Tuesday we will have a special podcast and that

(01:23:25):
will be on the last days of radio. We'll have
Suspense and Years Truly, Johnny Beller, the final shows of
the series, and will also have something that we have
not done we will have Orson Wells in his first
commentary that was done eighty years ago on the thirtieth

(01:23:47):
day of September nineteen forty five. That's coming up the
weekend here on Classic Radio Theater with Wyatcox anytime Classic
Radio Dot stream up next, Uncle Milty.

Speaker 2 (01:24:05):
Americans have always been noted for their nohow, and you,
young men in search of a career, you can put
this practical talent to excellent use in one of our
nation's many engineering schools. At the present time, we need engineers.
We need them to maintain our scientific and engineering superiority.
So look to your future, to America's future. Plan now

(01:24:26):
to become an engineer Now.

Speaker 7 (01:24:28):
The Milton Burles Show seventy eight years ago, September twenty third,
nineteen forty seven, as Milton salutes the automobile industry.

Speaker 15 (01:24:47):
If every smoker k whew what Philip Morris smokers know,
they'd all changed to Philip Morris. Johnny presents the Milton
Burle Show. Here comes Johnny, Ladies and gentlemen. Johnny on

(01:25:12):
the spot for Philip Morris, America's finest cigarette. If everybody
smoking you what Philip Morris smokers know? They'd all changed
to Philip Morris. Yes, they'd all.

Speaker 8 (01:25:37):
Our radio city in New York.

Speaker 46 (01:25:38):
Here's the Newton Borough Show with Burt Kelvin, Jack Albertson,
ronalds sang Mary Ship, Jack Hartley, our singing star, Nick Corney,
the music of Ravelock in his orchestra, and yours truly,
Frank Allen.

Speaker 15 (01:25:52):
Ladies and gentlemen, Tonight we salute the great automobile industry,
proud makers of Buick, Plymouth, Studebaker, in keeping with the spirit,
are on Milton Berle. When I was spent the next
half hour making a mash of himself.

Speaker 22 (01:26:06):
And here he is, Milton Berle, Thank youill.

Speaker 4 (01:26:14):
Oh you're in fine diction tonight, mister gallup't you thank you?
Thank you? Good evening, ladies, gentle automobiles.

Speaker 45 (01:26:19):
Mister Gallup, you remember when we used to sing come
along with me, Lucy in my merry, ohs my bile.

Speaker 4 (01:26:26):
Today they sing stay at home with me heavy. I'm
on the.

Speaker 8 (01:26:30):
Waiting list for a Chevy.

Speaker 45 (01:26:33):
I could have said I look shop as any raisor
in my brand new Kaiser phrases.

Speaker 15 (01:26:38):
I could have said that, but I'm glad I didn't.
Oh come now, Bert people are getting new cars.

Speaker 45 (01:26:45):
Yes, they are getting new You're right, mister Gallup. My
brother Frank, you know, Frank brand boy three grand every week.

Speaker 4 (01:26:56):
My brother Frank, he.

Speaker 45 (01:26:57):
Just got a new car, a new nineteen forty seven
convertible coop.

Speaker 15 (01:27:01):
Reconvertible coop. You mean convertible. No, I mean I mean
I mean revertable.

Speaker 8 (01:27:08):
It's gonna allow suff the joke, now what I just said.

Speaker 4 (01:27:12):
No, I mean revertable because at the end of the
month it reverts back to the finals. You get it,
mister Allah. You see you said revertable and I said
re convertible, and it revites back to the girl girl.

Speaker 15 (01:27:27):
If you ever again make me a party do a
joke like that, I'll roll up this script and flog
you with it.

Speaker 8 (01:27:32):
Mister Gallup.

Speaker 15 (01:27:33):
You'll give me another straight line like that, and I'll
pull out your tongue and bread it around your nose.

Speaker 4 (01:27:39):
Mistic Gallup. But you should know by now that in
order for me to tell a joke, I need a stooge, stood, yes, Hi,
Frank Gallup, a stooge. Now, now wait a minute, I who.

Speaker 15 (01:27:48):
Is the music commentator for the Great Toscanini or Mystic Gallup?
I who was once asked by Asha Heifetz to hold
his rosen. But please, mister Gallups, I am the wearer
of the Andre Costell on its belt for faithful service
to music. But mister Galloper, hi a stooge for Milton
burlshy peasant.

Speaker 4 (01:28:11):
Yes, mister Gallup, sir, mind you Burl.

Speaker 15 (01:28:15):
I don't mind an occasion the change of quips, as
I'm rather good at that sort of thing.

Speaker 4 (01:28:19):
I know you are, mister Gallup.

Speaker 15 (01:28:20):
However, in the future, when we engage in a bit
of horse play, allow me to choose which part of
the horse I'm going to play.

Speaker 4 (01:28:29):
But mister Gallup, you don't understand I'm supposed.

Speaker 15 (01:28:31):
To be the star allegedly. Yes, so let us settle
it once and for all. Henceforth, all serious matters will
be handled by me. All right, and let's leave the
comedy to Bob Hope.

Speaker 8 (01:28:43):
Mister Gallup.

Speaker 4 (01:28:45):
Mister Gallup, you've hurt me, hurt me deeply, painfully and mortally. Humber.

Speaker 22 (01:28:52):
Let's not slobber.

Speaker 45 (01:28:55):
Oh, sure, that's the popular sport. Now to making selling
jokes about Milton World. Go ahead, but let me tell
you one thing. I remember every one of those insulting jokes.
I use them all later, Burl.

Speaker 15 (01:29:07):
If you've quite finished with this revolting display of self pity,
let us get on with our subject, the automobile industry.

Speaker 4 (01:29:13):
But mister Gallup, why is such a depressing subject? Customer
is fighting with auto dealers, long waitingless, high prices.

Speaker 8 (01:29:19):
Prove Berl.

Speaker 15 (01:29:20):
That's why the night's We're taking our listeners back to
happier days. Yes, it was just a few years ago
when all you had to do was walk into any
automobile dealer showroom and this is what would happen.

Speaker 8 (01:29:38):
Well, well, well, well, well, mister Burl, so you've come
in to buy one of our new cars. Maybe, Oh,
mister Burl, just look at this model sixteen cylinders, mother
of pearl spark plugs. She covers my hattie Carnegie, the
fourteen carat fists and rings, Chippendale rear view.

Speaker 4 (01:29:59):
Mirror, and a tale from an unborn mink for the radiator.

Speaker 8 (01:30:02):
Cap.

Speaker 4 (01:30:04):
Oh, mister Berl, this car is just for you. Take
it please, maybe, cap, mister Barrel. Look at that car,
Get behind the wheel, drive it around for a couple
of years if you like it. If you like it,
send us a little something each month.

Speaker 22 (01:30:22):
If you don't like it, just jump it somewhere.

Speaker 14 (01:30:24):
On the street.

Speaker 4 (01:30:25):
We'll pick it up later.

Speaker 22 (01:30:27):
Oh please, mister Burle say yes.

Speaker 45 (01:30:29):
Well, I don't know about that radiator cap, that bronze
bust of the president of General Motors signing with the
United Auto Workers.

Speaker 14 (01:30:37):
You don't like you know, I don't.

Speaker 4 (01:30:40):
There.

Speaker 8 (01:30:40):
We'll replace it with the head of one of our
vice presidents in gold.

Speaker 4 (01:30:44):
No, the real head. Oh, mister Burl, have a heart
buy it? Well, when can I have delivery in fifteen minutes?
Fifteen minutes? Yes, what's the matter? Another strike? Tell me
what's the price?

Speaker 8 (01:31:00):
Well, well, the list price is five hundred dollars the
list price.

Speaker 4 (01:31:05):
Let me get out of this clip joint. Oh well, wait,
mister Barl, wait, naturally, we'll give you a liberal allowance
for your old car. Oh well, yes, let me see
that's my car on the front, that nineteen twenty two Essex. Well,
i'll give you three hundred dollars three hundred. Yeah, that's
the Big Grove of Cleveland model. Oh I'm sorry, I
didn't see. It is in good condition, it has a tire.

(01:31:29):
I'll give you six hundred. Okay, Oh, mister Burl, You'll
never regret it.

Speaker 8 (01:31:33):
Now, let's see five hundred for the new car, six
hundred lunce for your old car. Here you are a
check for one hundred dollars, and here are the keys
to your new car.

Speaker 4 (01:31:41):
Oh thank you, mister Burle. Come in again, please, there
I go again.

Speaker 15 (01:31:45):
No sales resistance, Yes, those were wonderful days. Well, now
let us observe Milton Berle going in to see the
same dealer about a new car today.

Speaker 4 (01:32:06):
Excuse me, my name is burrow MANA.

Speaker 8 (01:32:08):
Yeah, you see that table there, don't you. I want
to see three hundred dollars a hundred before I even
look at you.

Speaker 4 (01:32:17):
Yes, sir, there it is. Now I've been on the list,
so yeah, A price is ten thousand dollars.

Speaker 8 (01:32:25):
Yeah, that's the list price.

Speaker 15 (01:32:27):
That's gotta be a little extra in it for me.
Wait a minute, I gave you three hundred under the
table that.

Speaker 4 (01:32:31):
Was for that table.

Speaker 8 (01:32:32):
That's yours.

Speaker 22 (01:32:32):
Take it off, but I chat up.

Speaker 4 (01:32:37):
When can I have delivery? How old are you? Thirty five?
You'll ever make it?

Speaker 29 (01:32:44):
But I ah, forget about it.

Speaker 8 (01:32:46):
I got a beautiful used coffeel just one thousand dollars.

Speaker 4 (01:32:49):
Then it's yours. Well, it's a deal. Here's the money.
Where's the car?

Speaker 9 (01:32:52):
There?

Speaker 22 (01:32:52):
It is nineteen twenty two, Essex.

Speaker 4 (01:32:56):
See my old big Grove of Cleveland model. It's just
what I've wanted. Thank you, thank you.

Speaker 34 (01:33:01):
Yeah ah, yes, yes, mister Gallup.

Speaker 45 (01:33:15):
Those were the wonderful days when you took new cars
for granted. When in your shiny new car with that
one and only girl, you snuggle up to her and you.

Speaker 31 (01:33:23):
Sang, give me the road, the white whining highway, just
that meets thee, the unbeaten byway, and I'll travel along.

Speaker 45 (01:33:36):
Call uh Cynthia, Cynthia. Golden memories, golden memories of Cynthia.
I'll tell you when a laugh, lady. Please, In my
heart there is always still that picture of you, Cynthia,

(01:33:58):
speeding down the highway.

Speaker 4 (01:33:59):
But Papa car would be down, the prop of the
car would be open, and the owner of the car
would be chasing you.

Speaker 45 (01:34:06):
On the open road, hitchhiking with Cynthia. Remember that day, Cynthia,
when no one would stop ris, you lifted your skirt
and you held your leg out on the highway that
stopped the cars for miles. They thought it was a
fallen tree. Poor poor nearsighted Cynthia. Remember how you'd stick
your head out of the car window to read the

(01:34:26):
Burma shave signs.

Speaker 4 (01:34:28):
Then one day you stuck your head out too far,
boing boing boin getting smacked. Getting smacked by those signs
gave you a smart, stylish.

Speaker 45 (01:34:41):
Look, a sort of off the face face. But it
was Cynthia's driving that made me love a What a
road hard you were, Cynthia.

Speaker 4 (01:34:50):
Used to keep an apple in your mouth, used to
keep an apple in your mouth, Throw that gag in
a rider's mouth. But it was a little thing.

Speaker 45 (01:35:02):
I don't think it'll fit. They got too many old
ones in there now, ah. But it was the little
things I remember about you, Cynthia, your tinkling little laugh
whenever they catch you filing the engine numbers off of
hot cars, those tired little lines that would appear around
your mouth after a hard night of siphoning gas out

(01:35:24):
of park cars.

Speaker 4 (01:35:27):
Yes, Cynthia, all of your life you were crazy about cause.
I guess that's why you turned out to be such
an old crime. But as for me, I'll.

Speaker 8 (01:35:39):
Travel alone.

Speaker 11 (01:35:42):
An so.

Speaker 4 (01:35:54):
Kill no no, please, now I have none of that nouplause.
Please norplause. Oh, you'll see what will happen.

Speaker 45 (01:36:01):
You'll you'll call NBC's attention to the fact.

Speaker 4 (01:36:03):
That I'm on the network. You see it and make
the seat red network. I made it up, joke. I'm cooked.
If they ever find out I'm cooked, you know I'm cooked. Well,
that's you're lying.

Speaker 15 (01:36:13):
I'm say tonight, let us take our listeners behind the
scenes of the Great Automobile Industry.

Speaker 4 (01:36:22):
No, well, maybe I'll think about it yet, Well, what
have you got to say next?

Speaker 14 (01:36:32):
If we do?

Speaker 4 (01:36:33):
Yes, if we do, I say, we don't want to,
And what have you.

Speaker 8 (01:36:37):
Got to read next?

Speaker 4 (01:36:42):
I'm in that mood to my Houston gal, though, there
will be no fun in the studio.

Speaker 8 (01:36:51):
Let's this is between your knee? Did you hear that? Applause?

Speaker 11 (01:36:58):
Just then?

Speaker 45 (01:37:00):
Gray Block, trying to keep himself awake, I say, you
say that you want to take the listeners behind the
scenes the great Automobile Industry.

Speaker 26 (01:37:07):
No, well, I've got an eye, deear, mister Gallup. I've
got an idea, you know what, you know?

Speaker 4 (01:37:23):
Being that with our whole subject, our automobiles. You know
who I'm going to be tonight? Who Walter P.

Speaker 22 (01:37:29):
Burrow?

Speaker 15 (01:37:32):
Yes, he's the automotive industry. Man, the head of that
great auto corporation, And what are you doing?

Speaker 45 (01:37:36):
I am addressing my board of governors, gentlemen, I am
proud to announce.

Speaker 4 (01:37:42):
That the new nineteen forty seven Burl eight is on
the market.

Speaker 29 (01:37:46):
Alrah, lurrah.

Speaker 4 (01:37:50):
That's the spirit, gentlemen. We have to do something about
our salesmanship.

Speaker 14 (01:37:54):
Now.

Speaker 45 (01:37:55):
Every one of us has got to get out there
and push the new Burl eight. That's the only way
they'll go. And don't worry, gentlemen, we have a new
gadget that will revolutionize the auto industry. What's the new gadget?

Speaker 30 (01:38:06):
Boss?

Speaker 8 (01:38:07):
What a new gadget? Minke?

Speaker 4 (01:38:11):
You'll find out for yourself.

Speaker 45 (01:38:12):
I'm busy. I have to put Johnny on the spot. Tony, Johnny,
why is Philip Morris so much better to smoke?

Speaker 3 (01:38:21):
If your answer, sir, it's because the Philip Morris smoker
really gets what other smokers.

Speaker 15 (01:38:26):
Only has to get, Right, Johnny, Philip Morris is the
one leading cigarette with an exclusive difference in manufacture, the
only leading cigarette scientifically proved far less irritating to the
nose and throat. Remember, less irritation means more enjoyment. That's
why the Philip Morris smoker really gets what other smokers
only hope to get better taste, finer flavor, perfect smoking pleasure.

Speaker 4 (01:38:52):
Doesn't every smoker know that?

Speaker 47 (01:38:54):
No?

Speaker 15 (01:38:58):
If every smoker you Philip Morris smokers, no, they'd all
changed to Philip Morris, America's Pineus cigarette or perfect smoking pleasure.

Speaker 22 (01:39:07):
Try a pack of Philip Morris today.

Speaker 8 (01:39:18):
That was my Heart as a hobo arrangements by Flash Gordon.
That was Ray Black, Philip Myris, Arkis and Ray your
music and your orchestra as well. You're playing to be
summed up in two words, mo rehearsals. And now, as
we continue our salute to the great automotive industry, we

(01:39:39):
now present.

Speaker 4 (01:39:42):
Automobile Forum Tonight.

Speaker 22 (01:39:44):
Automobile Forum Tonight.

Speaker 14 (01:39:46):
The question do you.

Speaker 22 (01:39:48):
Close the new student baker with a door or a cork?

Speaker 8 (01:39:54):
Nothing?

Speaker 4 (01:39:59):
Thank you, miss to Gallop and now you're back on Prudential.
And now let us.

Speaker 45 (01:40:07):
Let us proceed with the questions about automobiles. Let's start
with this gentleman opening the bottle of beer with his teeth.

Speaker 8 (01:40:13):
Yes, sir, mister Barrel, I'm tired of the same old
wreck you're in and year out the same old wreck
on the street.

Speaker 4 (01:40:18):
People always point and say, look at that old heap.
Then why don't you get rid of the old heap?

Speaker 22 (01:40:22):
I'd like to, but she won't give me a divorce.

Speaker 24 (01:40:26):
Thank you.

Speaker 45 (01:40:26):
Now you let's move on, all right? This young man
wearing the chintznickers a young man?

Speaker 4 (01:40:31):
What is what is your name?

Speaker 8 (01:40:33):
My name is Lady Esther, Lady Esther.

Speaker 16 (01:40:38):
Yeah, but I'm not the real lady.

Speaker 4 (01:40:40):
Yes, poor, you're not not the real one. Got a
deeper voice. Oh that's true.

Speaker 48 (01:40:46):
My father coming to name Lady Ester because he said
I belong in a jaw. I see, before I changed
my name to Lady Esther, I had a boy's name.

Speaker 4 (01:40:57):
A boy's name. What was it, Lady Mendel? All right, lady, yes,
do you have something to say about the new automobiles?

Speaker 48 (01:41:04):
Yeah, but I don't feel like talking right now. Well,
I'm a funny guy. If I don't feel like talking,
I don't talk.

Speaker 4 (01:41:09):
Yeah, but no funny can make me talk either.

Speaker 8 (01:41:12):
You hear about it.

Speaker 4 (01:41:13):
No, that's stop nag coming. I'm telling you my leptore saying,
all right, trama citagen.

Speaker 8 (01:41:16):
You can't make me talk.

Speaker 4 (01:41:17):
If you play my feet, we can look what trauma.

Speaker 8 (01:41:19):
Citigen.

Speaker 4 (01:41:20):
You can't make me talk even if you missed the
district that.

Speaker 34 (01:41:23):
Yeah, but we're trying, harma, Citigen.

Speaker 4 (01:41:25):
You can't let me talk of your beat.

Speaker 32 (01:41:27):
Me talk to me, throw me insolitary, please do on
hit me good screaming over my blood?

Speaker 8 (01:41:31):
But I ain'te talking.

Speaker 38 (01:41:37):
I'll please.

Speaker 4 (01:41:39):
Let us not create a the service, young man. If
you have a question, let's hear it. Okay, would you
like to tweeze my eyebrows?

Speaker 16 (01:41:48):
Oh?

Speaker 4 (01:41:49):
Please, let's get on to the ladies.

Speaker 8 (01:41:50):
All right.

Speaker 45 (01:41:50):
This lady in the isle shaking paprika on the frog's legs.
Young lady, what is your name? Please tell a fenie.

Speaker 3 (01:41:56):
I'm a homemaker.

Speaker 4 (01:41:58):
I see, And you have a question.

Speaker 3 (01:42:00):
Yeah, how can I stop my husband from tinkering with cars?

Speaker 4 (01:42:02):
Your husband likes to tinker.

Speaker 3 (01:42:04):
He's the biggest tinker in the neighborhood. Really, he likes
to take cars apart. Once he took a car apart
in thirty seconds.

Speaker 4 (01:42:12):
Thirty seconds. He must have had help, Yeah, from a
telephone pole. I see what you mean.

Speaker 3 (01:42:18):
What a picture he makes every Saturday rolling down the highway?

Speaker 4 (01:42:22):
What's wrong with that?

Speaker 3 (01:42:23):
I got to sober him up and help him back
in the car. I understand him and is fancy driving.
You should see how we can stop on a dime.
For doing that, they threw him in jail.

Speaker 4 (01:42:32):
They threw him in jail for stopping on the dime.

Speaker 3 (01:42:34):
Yeah, the dime was in a pedestrian's pocket.

Speaker 4 (01:42:38):
Gee, that's terrible.

Speaker 3 (01:42:39):
You should see them gadgets for the car. He even
got a raccoon tail. It's amazing.

Speaker 4 (01:42:44):
What's amazing about having a raccoon tail throwing out of him?

Speaker 27 (01:42:47):
Oh?

Speaker 4 (01:42:49):
Oh, that's different.

Speaker 3 (01:42:50):
Whenever I'm with him, he drives with one hand. It's insulting.

Speaker 45 (01:42:53):
That's romantic. What's insulting about your husband driving with one hand?

Speaker 3 (01:42:56):
What's insulting? The other hand he keeps on his wallets?

Speaker 8 (01:42:59):
That did it, grammer?

Speaker 45 (01:43:04):
And now and now it's the most appropriate closing to
our automobile forum. Let us all join together and sing.

Speaker 4 (01:43:11):
There are cars that looks so snappy, There are cars
that never go.

Speaker 45 (01:43:19):
There's a car to suit the speedy driver. There's one
four of a Sunday driving shmow.

Speaker 3 (01:43:27):
There are cards of every make and color. Youlluffy and
reconcide it can.

Speaker 4 (01:43:34):
But the cars let fill our hands with money, are
the ones we sell to.

Speaker 8 (01:43:40):
The smiling Irishman's Schmann's Schmannshmanshman.

Speaker 4 (01:43:54):
I love those automobiles songs, unless you like those, mister Gallup.
I know everything about automobiles, I really do.

Speaker 14 (01:44:00):
Well.

Speaker 22 (01:44:00):
I'm sure that you've had some experience that you'd like
to tell us about.

Speaker 45 (01:44:04):
Yes, I would love to tell you about, mister Gallup.
One summer, I decided to take the family on a
motoring trip up to Canada.

Speaker 4 (01:44:10):
So the night before we were all packing in on
mine Darling, will you hurry up and finish packing. We
got to get to bed early.

Speaker 47 (01:44:20):
We're getting up at six the lax Milton, Yeah, take
it easy, pop your last longer, Dolling, This is awful.

Speaker 4 (01:44:28):
I was through papping packing two hours ago.

Speaker 48 (01:44:30):
I'm packing a toothbrush and a racing form.

Speaker 4 (01:44:35):
It's just a camping trip up north.

Speaker 1 (01:44:36):
Yeah, but a racing form. What are you gonna bet on?

Speaker 4 (01:44:38):
Moose? Quiet, Junior, we're going up to the Canadian woods.
Wait a minute, what's the idea of packing your new
sailor suit?

Speaker 16 (01:44:45):
Boll I might run into one of the own sisters.

Speaker 4 (01:44:48):
They're just my age, you.

Speaker 8 (01:44:49):
Know, did you hear?

Speaker 4 (01:44:53):
Junior Dolling?

Speaker 8 (01:44:54):
He has romance at his age. He got that from me.

Speaker 4 (01:44:57):
I wish you'd give it back to you.

Speaker 1 (01:44:58):
You could use it.

Speaker 4 (01:45:02):
It's very funny. Come on, darling, let's go to bed.
I'll turn out the lights.

Speaker 1 (01:45:05):
Dere all right, Milton, good night, Junior.

Speaker 4 (01:45:10):
Oh no, that knock. That must be Sam Harrison and
his wife Martha. If that corny wind bag gets his.

Speaker 1 (01:45:16):
Foot in the door, Milton, their neighbors be now.

Speaker 4 (01:45:20):
I'll brush them off.

Speaker 8 (01:45:21):
Come in. Well, howdy do he do not do?

Speaker 4 (01:45:28):
Hello? Sam? Hello Martha.

Speaker 8 (01:45:31):
I'll saw your geloppa outside.

Speaker 32 (01:45:33):
I'll back for a trip, So I said, There goes
the Burls off on a night's long trip and we
haven't even said goodbye.

Speaker 8 (01:45:38):
Let's drop over. Isn't that what I said?

Speaker 4 (01:45:40):
Matha? Yes, well that's awfully nicy of Sam. Yeah, we're
leaving for Canada in the morning.

Speaker 5 (01:45:53):
Canada.

Speaker 4 (01:45:54):
Yeah.

Speaker 32 (01:45:54):
Well, the minute I saw those sleeping bags on the
front bumper, I said, they're going to Canada, didn't I?

Speaker 8 (01:46:01):
Mother, Yes, Look the folks.

Speaker 45 (01:46:06):
We're getting up at six in the morning, Sam, So
we're all about to get ready.

Speaker 32 (01:46:10):
Oh, there's nothing like an early star reminds me of
the time. Martha and I drove up to Albany for
his sister's wedding.

Speaker 4 (01:46:19):
Sam, it's late.

Speaker 8 (01:46:20):
Please, it's a very swell story, Milk, little.

Speaker 4 (01:46:23):
Long brab Yes, some other times, Sam, thanks very much
for dropping in. Tell us Sam, what happened on your
trip to Albany?

Speaker 8 (01:46:33):
Julia?

Speaker 4 (01:46:34):
How many times have I told you to keep quiet
when adults are talking?

Speaker 32 (01:46:37):
Well, Milk, we all went to bed early, and you
know we were in the sacon ten minutes when the
telephone rings. It was the gas company. No, wait, say mother,
Yes I wasn't the gas company. Yes, all right, it

(01:46:58):
was the gas company.

Speaker 8 (01:46:59):
Now look Sam.

Speaker 32 (01:47:00):
Ten minutes later, another phone call, Sam, So here I
am here. I am parked outside of philling station, waiting
for Martha to come out. Milton, you're not listening.

Speaker 3 (01:47:23):
Oh.

Speaker 1 (01:47:26):
Milton, wake up?

Speaker 8 (01:47:28):
Who deals?

Speaker 4 (01:47:29):
Who deals?

Speaker 1 (01:47:31):
Milton?

Speaker 4 (01:47:32):
Sam? Look at the clock. It's two in the morning.

Speaker 8 (01:47:34):
Well, so long, Milt. Nice seeing you, wasn't it, mother?

Speaker 11 (01:47:38):
Yeah?

Speaker 4 (01:47:40):
Good bye, Sam? Good bye Martha? Oh brother, quick doning,
let's get to bed. No no, please, Sam, Canada Kennedy.

Speaker 8 (01:47:50):
You know what just dawned on me. You're going to Canada.

Speaker 4 (01:47:55):
Martha and I took a trip to Canada ten years ago,
didn't we mother?

Speaker 11 (01:47:58):
Yes?

Speaker 4 (01:48:01):
Please, it's just a camping trip.

Speaker 32 (01:48:02):
I'm camping trip to say, well, look what happened to us.
Martha was almost attacked by a bear.

Speaker 4 (01:48:08):
Won't you did?

Speaker 8 (01:48:09):
Yes? What did she do? Talk away out of it? Sam, Sam? Please,
And that's not all.

Speaker 32 (01:48:22):
Martha accidentally put some poison ivy in a mixed green salad.
Why are you should have seen my mouth for three
whole days. I couldn't talk. Isn't that right?

Speaker 8 (01:48:31):
Fatha?

Speaker 4 (01:48:32):
Yeah?

Speaker 8 (01:48:36):
Sam, please smell. Look, why don't you go to Atlantic City?

Speaker 4 (01:48:40):
Sam?

Speaker 32 (01:48:41):
Atlantic City? That's where little Martha and I spin our honeymoon,
isn't it dear?

Speaker 8 (01:48:47):
Yes?

Speaker 27 (01:48:49):
Sam?

Speaker 4 (01:48:50):
Please?

Speaker 32 (01:48:56):
Oh that Atlantic City. That's saltwater tabby for breakfast. Sham hell,
Look at four o'clock we'd better run along.

Speaker 4 (01:49:04):
Shama, Yeah, sham well s.

Speaker 8 (01:49:09):
He in Atlantic City? Atlantic City at this time of
the year. Go home by the place for you in Hot.

Speaker 32 (01:49:15):
Springs, arkansall go home every day. Swimming in that sofur
makes you a new man. Go to Canada, lazy afternoons
in the steam room. Go to Hot Spring Carts.

Speaker 4 (01:49:30):
If you don't like Southern cooking, there's always Niagara Falls.

Speaker 8 (01:49:33):
Go to.

Speaker 19 (01:49:43):
Night plap, watch your driver wake up.

Speaker 4 (01:49:47):
Head morning air.

Speaker 1 (01:49:49):
Are you sure this is the way to Niagara Falls?

Speaker 4 (01:49:51):
Sam, This is the way we always go, Hey, Matha, Yes,
wada is nice? Now too, sham that old thing, surf
the thank you, thank you. I'll be back in just

(01:50:14):
a moment, ready or not. And in the meantime, here
is mister gallup with two words.

Speaker 15 (01:50:18):
Philip Morris is the only leading cigarette scientifically proved far
less irritating to the nose and throat. Remember, less irritation
means more enjoyment. That's why the Philip Morris smoker really
gets what other smokers only hope to get better taste,
find a flavor, perfect smoking pleasure.

Speaker 22 (01:50:37):
Yes, it's true.

Speaker 49 (01:50:38):
If every smoker knew what Philip Morris smokers know, they'd
all change to Philip Morris, Made in America, Buy Americans, do, Please,
American tastes, Philip Morris, America's finest cigarette.

Speaker 15 (01:51:37):
Daylight Saving Time ends in certain areas on September twenty eighth.
This may change the time at which the Milton Berle
Show has heard in your community. Please check your local
newspaper for the time at which this program.

Speaker 14 (01:51:48):
Will be heard.

Speaker 22 (01:51:48):
Next Tuesday and East Tuesday there after.

Speaker 4 (01:51:51):
Thank you very much, mister Gallup.

Speaker 45 (01:51:53):
And while you're mentioning things, would you mention that starting
tomorrow Wednesday, I'm appearing in.

Speaker 4 (01:51:57):
Person at the Roxy Theater here in New York. No,
well you won't even mention that I'm funnier than ever.
And then I have some new jokes. No fine cooperation.
As far as your concern, I could drop dead, he yours.

Speaker 33 (01:52:14):
Good night, ladies and gentlemen, Good night, good drinks, Johnny again,
returning now to the thousands of store windows and towers
all over America.

Speaker 1 (01:52:31):
Look for me.

Speaker 17 (01:52:32):
I'll be waiting for you. Come in.

Speaker 15 (01:52:46):
Yes, every smoker knew what Philip Morris smokers, No, they'd
all changed to Philip Morris America's minus cigarette. And now goodbye, Johnny.
See you next Tuesday, same stage, when Philip Morris will
again present the Milton Berle Show.

Speaker 29 (01:53:04):
Until then, Hello, Hello, Testing one, two, three, four, five.

Speaker 8 (01:53:25):
That's it.

Speaker 15 (01:53:25):
Five pipe smokers. Try Revelation pipe tobacco, A smooth blend
of five tobaccos. Yes, relax, take five. Take Revelation a
fine pipe tobacco. The Milton Burl Show was written by
Matt Hykeen and Navigan letter Frank Alapanga Knight for Philip Morrick.

Speaker 40 (01:53:58):
Yeah.

Speaker 7 (01:54:00):
Eight years ago, September twenty third, nineteen forty seven, Milton
Burrell on Classic Radio Theater with Wyant Couxs. As we
mentioned earlier, you know, we're kind of a special eche podcast.
We don't just play old radio shows. We talk about
what they mean. And you know, this show was probably
Milton Burroll's best radio show, and that is what got

(01:54:23):
him into being a television show because, if you not,
his radio show very similar to what the Texico Star
Theater ended up being on television. Okay, but we also
appreciate your support and you can do that by going
to Classic Radio dot stream that's Classic Radio dot stream

(01:54:44):
to support the podcast. Coming up next, we'll go to
the movies with of all people, Bred mc murray.

Speaker 14 (01:54:58):
Ladies and gentlemen.

Speaker 15 (01:55:00):
Last year's traffic death tolls thirty seven five hundred, a
seven percent increase over nineteen fifty. The National Safety Council
believes that the best way to promote safety on the
road is for each of us to know and obey
traffic laws, to read.

Speaker 8 (01:55:15):
And heed traffic signs, So be careful.

Speaker 14 (01:55:19):
The life you save may be your own.

Speaker 7 (01:55:22):
Now we go to the movies. The screen director's Playhouse
production of Don't Trust Your Husband starring Fred McMurray, an
adaptation of the nineteen forty eight motion picture starring mc murray.
This is from seventy six years ago, September twenty third,
nineteen forty nine.

Speaker 6 (01:55:39):
Oh waiter, Yes sh I'll have Yankee pop roast, some
mashed potatoes, a mixed green salad with French dressing, and
the bottle of cold caps blue ribbon, Yes, sir, finess beer,
Sir anywhere from Hollywood, Perhaps blue Ribbon Finess fear served anywhere.

Speaker 22 (01:56:07):
Proudly presented the.

Speaker 15 (01:56:15):
Screen Director's Playhouse production Don't Trust Your Husband, director Lloyd Bacon,
star Fred McMurray to Hollywood screen Directors present an interlude

(01:56:42):
of laughter the motion picture comedy Don't Trust Your Husband,
starring Fred McMurray and introduced by the director of the film,
Lloyd Bacon. One of the facts of picture making is

(01:57:13):
that a camera is a machine that sees what the
director wants it to see, and if the machine can
capture a whole world of entertainment, much of the credit
belongs to such pioneer directors, as our guest tonight, the
creator of such grand films as Mother is a freshman.

Speaker 6 (01:57:30):
You were meant for me, And of course don't trust
your husband. Ladies and gentlemen, mister Lloyd Bacon, thank you.
And you probably guess from the title of our story.

Speaker 44 (01:57:50):
It doesn't try to solve any pressing world problems, but
it might help you forget a few of them, as
we turned to the particular brand of nonsense that made
this picture some min's fun to do. Now Here it
is for the first time in the air, starring Fred
McMurray in his original role of Vince Stone.

Speaker 14 (01:58:08):
And don't Trust your husband.

Speaker 6 (01:58:23):
The title of our story does not necessarily reflect this
program's views on marriage. However, if you happen to be
the wife of an advertising executive who spends his evenings
with a mysterious client named mister Frasier, we advise you
to listen closely, especially if you should wake up at
six o'clock some morning and find your husband in evening

(01:58:44):
clothes tiptoeing into the bedroom.

Speaker 15 (01:58:53):
Vincent, Oh, good morning, Paula. I'm I'm sorry if the
if the alarm woke you up, I didn't hear it,
so you you must have been sleeping. I just turned
it off.

Speaker 1 (01:59:06):
Oh I thought you said you turned it off.

Speaker 14 (01:59:11):
Well it must be an echo.

Speaker 1 (01:59:16):
What are you doing in your clothes at six o'clock?

Speaker 15 (01:59:19):
Well, I've got a date with mister Fraser to play
golf in.

Speaker 1 (01:59:23):
Your tax though, Well, I like to be neat what
time did you get in?

Speaker 14 (01:59:31):
It was only what time did you fall asleep?

Speaker 1 (01:59:33):
There about one thirty.

Speaker 15 (01:59:35):
Well that's just about the time I got in. Mister
Fraser wouldn't let me get away any earlier.

Speaker 1 (01:59:40):
Did he sign the country?

Speaker 10 (01:59:41):
No, not yet, but he will Vince.

Speaker 1 (01:59:45):
Were you really with mister Fraser?

Speaker 14 (01:59:47):
Why, Paula, What a question? Certainly I was with him.
I mean I see as well there were teeing off
at seven. Goodbye, Paula.

Speaker 15 (01:59:57):
I was just thinking, I've been so busy lately. Maybe
we should take a night off for ourselves, go somewhere.

Speaker 1 (02:00:02):
That would be very nice. You picked the spot, darling.
I wouldn't want to call you a liar, so you
just run along your golf game, yes, dear, but I'd
like to break a newblick over your head.

Speaker 14 (02:00:16):
But that's very bad form, Pola. The rulebook calls for
a mashie shot.

Speaker 50 (02:00:22):
Oh, Vince, Yes, dear, you can tell mister Fraser I
don't like his brand and face powder.

Speaker 1 (02:00:27):
It keeps coming off on your lapels.

Speaker 15 (02:00:30):
Oh but Paula, I can't tell him that. He might
think I'm being carried Well, goodbye, dear.

Speaker 1 (02:00:37):
Oh darn Vince. What's happening to us?

Speaker 27 (02:00:42):
Hi?

Speaker 1 (02:00:43):
Don't you believe in letting his sister in law sleep
this morning?

Speaker 14 (02:00:46):
Oh? Hello?

Speaker 47 (02:00:47):
What's all commotions your brother? I think he's turning into
a fiend. Or maybe you're just feeding him too much meat.

Speaker 1 (02:00:54):
Honestly, I don't think there really is a mister Fraser.
Who's he spending all his time? That's what I'd like
to find out, the way he comes in at dawn
every morning. Maybe he's playing Pinochle with the milkman. No,
I'm serious, Eve, and I'm worried.

Speaker 17 (02:01:10):
You know.

Speaker 1 (02:01:11):
It's just too bad you can't worry him for a while.
I bet Vince wouldn't even be jealous of me anymore. No,
not unless you give him something to be jealous about.

Speaker 47 (02:01:19):
And you couldn't. It couldn't, Paula. You could the Ted
Burd Talent Agency. They handle all kinds of actors. Now,
why couldn't you do this? Right after breakfast, We'll go
downtown to hire a Pello.

Speaker 8 (02:01:43):
Nelson.

Speaker 15 (02:01:44):
Yes, that's do take an into office memoir. Yes, mister,
don't to the president of Hendrick, Spenton, Dorton and Der
advertising Agency, mister Hendricks.

Speaker 14 (02:01:51):
I quit sign it for me and go hit mister
Hendricks across the mouth with it. It's my boy, mister Hendricks,
I've got news for you. That'll be all my news.

Speaker 8 (02:02:00):
It's not afraid to sign the contract.

Speaker 15 (02:02:02):
No, but she's breaking up my marriage. The company can
have the usual fifteen percent commissions.

Speaker 51 (02:02:06):
Why didn't you tell your wife that the president of
Maydom cos Medics.

Speaker 1 (02:02:09):
Is a woman?

Speaker 16 (02:02:10):
Why?

Speaker 14 (02:02:11):
Because Margot and I used to be engaged. That's why.

Speaker 15 (02:02:13):
You know how wives are about things like that. Qualifinds out.
I'm spending all this time with us. She'll never forgive me.
I'm sorry, Ted, but I can't go.

Speaker 14 (02:02:20):
Through with it. I'm quitting.

Speaker 8 (02:02:22):
You can't do that.

Speaker 14 (02:02:23):
You're the only one, model, Fraser. We'll talk business with business. Well,
she wants to do it, Nick, how long can I
fight her off? Well?

Speaker 51 (02:02:30):
Look in the look down now, how would you like
to be a partner in the business, Hendrix, Fenton, Darton,
Deer and Dome.

Speaker 14 (02:02:37):
How does that sound to you? I don't say it again?
And I Darton, Dirtans and Don. I was kind of fussy,
doesn't it. There's a big.

Speaker 51 (02:02:48):
Bonus, man, stand the job, get that contact and you're in.

Speaker 14 (02:02:52):
All right, mistics, all right, I'll try.

Speaker 17 (02:02:54):
Fine, my boy, fine, mister Don is mister Ted Burke
here to see.

Speaker 14 (02:03:02):
You, Nelson, mister Doan.

Speaker 10 (02:03:06):
I'm Ted Burke at the Burke Talent Agency.

Speaker 14 (02:03:08):
Oh yeah, sorry, Burke, we're not auditioning right now.

Speaker 10 (02:03:11):
Oh maybe you can throw a little business my way
if I do you a favor.

Speaker 14 (02:03:16):
Favor.

Speaker 10 (02:03:16):
Yeah, this morning a dame came into my office and
she wants to.

Speaker 51 (02:03:20):
Hire a guy to make a play for, you know,
right in front of her husband, make him jealous.

Speaker 14 (02:03:25):
Well, look what's that got to do with me?

Speaker 6 (02:03:27):
You're the husband.

Speaker 14 (02:03:30):
I thought you'd like to know.

Speaker 15 (02:03:32):
Yeah, yeah, well it's because just a little joke, great
little kidder my wife, you know, the.

Speaker 10 (02:03:39):
Sense of humor like that. It's a miracle you ain't
in the hospital.

Speaker 14 (02:03:44):
Tell me, Burke, where's all this going to happen?

Speaker 31 (02:03:47):
Oh?

Speaker 10 (02:03:47):
At the Spartan room. Tonight. Your wife says that you
will be sitting at table number four, So I reserve
table number three for my client.

Speaker 15 (02:03:54):
Oh well, be sure they got a good looking guy,
you know, someone I can really be jealous of.

Speaker 10 (02:04:00):
Well, I won't be hired.

Speaker 18 (02:04:04):
He'll be real class, you know, and probably poses a
big shot businessman.

Speaker 14 (02:04:10):
Yeah, we'll see who's jealous spoting Captain's death.

Speaker 16 (02:04:30):
Oh hello, Julius, this is Ted Burton, that Julius.

Speaker 4 (02:04:34):
Earlier today, I reserved table number three for one of
my actor clients, but he's going to be delayed. Can
you hold the reservation?

Speaker 6 (02:04:41):
Oh yeah, very busy, mister Burke, but we'll try.

Speaker 2 (02:04:44):
Oh sure, appreciate it, thanks, Julius.

Speaker 8 (02:04:48):
Captain.

Speaker 22 (02:04:49):
Oh good evening.

Speaker 6 (02:04:49):
Sir, you have a reservation. Well, I'm afraid not, but
my company usually has a stand in reservation. Your company, sir,
h kim Cigarettes.

Speaker 51 (02:04:57):
I'm Claude Kimbell kim Cigarette.

Speaker 6 (02:05:00):
My apologies, mister Kimball.

Speaker 14 (02:05:01):
Of course we have a table for you, table number three.

Speaker 51 (02:05:04):
The actor who reserved it is late yours app be sure,
mister Kimball to number three next to mister and missus Dawn.

Speaker 1 (02:05:19):
Then yes, Paula, you see that man at the next table.

Speaker 14 (02:05:23):
Yes, I know he's been watching you.

Speaker 1 (02:05:25):
I think he will at me.

Speaker 14 (02:05:27):
Maybe he's just twitchy.

Speaker 1 (02:05:28):
Well, how can you sit there and not a strange
man twitch at me.

Speaker 14 (02:05:33):
Don't worry, I'll take care of him.

Speaker 1 (02:05:35):
Darling, you're jealous now you just.

Speaker 15 (02:05:37):
Said where your apollow? This is a matter between two
male animals. Hello, Bob, I'm afraid I don't know you. Look,
if you're going to make love to my wife, you'll
have to do better than your doing. But sir, I
assure you I saw you watching it.

Speaker 14 (02:05:52):
I know just what you have in mind.

Speaker 6 (02:05:55):
Oh well, an I apologize.

Speaker 14 (02:06:00):
Come on over right over to our table. You don't
have any objection.

Speaker 15 (02:06:03):
Just don't take too long about making a play for
I have to get up in the morning, you know,
so let's get this over.

Speaker 14 (02:06:08):
We can get home early. Huh, thank you, darling. This
is mister. My name's Kimball. Yeah, I'm Vince Dawn and
this is my wife, Paula.

Speaker 1 (02:06:20):
How do you do now?

Speaker 14 (02:06:22):
You just said right here next to Paula.

Speaker 1 (02:06:23):
Uh huh, hold my hand, don't dard. You can kiss
me later.

Speaker 4 (02:06:35):
Man, they should beat Southern hospitality.

Speaker 14 (02:06:39):
Well, mister Kimball, what business. Are you in at the
back of business or tobacco business? Not any relation to
Claude Kimball, the tobacco tycoon, by any chance.

Speaker 2 (02:06:48):
Well, I'm Claude Kimble.

Speaker 14 (02:06:49):
You're Claude Kimball. Don't tell me.

Speaker 15 (02:06:53):
Well, Claude, I happened to be in the advertising business.
Hendrick spent in Dorton to door you've heard of them.

Speaker 14 (02:06:58):
Maybe someday we can handle your cars. Well maybe it could.

Speaker 1 (02:07:00):
Ben Clad put your arm around me.

Speaker 8 (02:07:10):
Vince, you're wife. I hope you don't mind.

Speaker 14 (02:07:15):
No, not at all, not at all. Cloud have a
good time. That's what we're here for.

Speaker 1 (02:07:20):
Can't you be a little more ardent? But your husband?
Where are you an amateur or something?

Speaker 4 (02:07:26):
All?

Speaker 6 (02:07:26):
Nothing around?

Speaker 14 (02:07:29):
I like it? Well you too. I hate to break
this up, but it's getting a little leaate.

Speaker 50 (02:07:34):
Oh, Vince, Claude and I were just beginning to enjoy
each other's company.

Speaker 15 (02:07:38):
Well, then how about getting together tomorrow the three of I. No, no,
I'm going to be busy, But why don't you two
make a day of it?

Speaker 14 (02:07:43):
Huh?

Speaker 1 (02:07:44):
Vence growing up? Have fun?

Speaker 10 (02:07:46):
Well, I'm willing, and so am I.

Speaker 14 (02:07:49):
Vince. Oh man, I'm on to think about that kim
Cigarette a camp of your company. Oh sure, sure, sure,
claud you do that.

Speaker 1 (02:07:56):
Good night, Claude.

Speaker 8 (02:07:57):
Until tomorrow, Paula.

Speaker 14 (02:07:59):
If you have any friends that you think it like
my wife, just bring them around.

Speaker 8 (02:08:04):
Well, if you don't mind, I think if keeper adjusted myself.

Speaker 1 (02:08:08):
It's lefter all. You are my husband.

Speaker 15 (02:08:11):
But I trust you, dear, and you trust me, and
if we trust each other, there's nothing to worry about,
is there.

Speaker 14 (02:08:29):
Good morning, miss Nelson.

Speaker 1 (02:08:30):
Oh, mister down and mister Kimball has been phoning you
all morning.

Speaker 14 (02:08:33):
Kimble. Oh yes, Kimball a great little actor.

Speaker 8 (02:08:36):
That guys.

Speaker 1 (02:08:36):
Mister Hendrix is waiting in your office.

Speaker 14 (02:08:38):
Thanks Milson.

Speaker 51 (02:08:41):
Oh morning boss, congratulations my boy. From this minute you're
a partner in this business summer.

Speaker 14 (02:08:47):
But I haven't landed the Margot Fraser account.

Speaker 51 (02:08:49):
Yes, I'm talking about the kim Cigarette account card.

Speaker 14 (02:08:52):
Kimball phone this morning. He did. He said he's giving
all his business to us and your credit. You with
the account Kimball. Claude, Kimball, are you sure?

Speaker 8 (02:09:02):
Yes, I'm sure.

Speaker 14 (02:09:05):
What's the matter?

Speaker 37 (02:09:05):
Boy?

Speaker 14 (02:09:06):
You look sick? Something inside of me just died.

Speaker 10 (02:09:10):
Tell me how did you get to know Kimball anyway
through my wife.

Speaker 8 (02:09:14):
I guess I didn't know you were in so solid
with him.

Speaker 14 (02:09:18):
I didn't know myself, he says.

Speaker 51 (02:09:21):
He considers you're a close friend, he does, and your
wife even closer.

Speaker 15 (02:09:27):
Mister Hendrix, do you know what a man says when
he's just put his wife on a silver platter and
handed her to somebody else?

Speaker 1 (02:09:34):
What?

Speaker 6 (02:10:01):
You are listening to the screen director's playhouse production of
Don't Trust Your Husband, starring Fred McMurray and introduced by
the director of the film, Lloyd Bacon.

Speaker 2 (02:10:19):
You are at.

Speaker 6 (02:10:20):
Elkhart, Indiana. The train has just pulled out. You, hot,
tired and bored from your long journey, stoop over to
pick up your suitcase and sample kit. There must be
some place in this town where a man can get
a tall cooling glass of paps blue ribbon gathering dusk.
You search among the neon signs.

Speaker 8 (02:10:41):
Ah, there you are, just.

Speaker 6 (02:10:44):
Across the street, that little blue sign, papped blue ribbon,
finest beer served anywhere. Yes, during these late September days.
You're just one of millions of men all over America
to whom that papped blue ribbon sign means welcoming. For
papped blue ribbon does something more than quench your thirst.

(02:11:06):
It gives you taste, blue ribbon taste, the kind of
taste you can't get anywhere else in the world except
in that papped blue ribbon bottle. And fortunately you can
get that papped blue ribbon bottle all over the world.

Speaker 14 (02:11:21):
Yes, you hear it.

Speaker 6 (02:11:22):
Everywhere in Elkhart and Elmira and Easton or Evanston. Papped
blue ribbon finest beer served anywhere.

Speaker 8 (02:11:33):
Your taste will tell you why.

Speaker 6 (02:11:43):
Now back to the screen director's playhouse production of Don't
Trust Your Husband starring Fred McCurry.

Speaker 16 (02:12:01):
Paula Paula, Where are you, hey, Vince?

Speaker 1 (02:12:04):
Why are you doing home? Sorrow?

Speaker 8 (02:12:05):
Oh?

Speaker 14 (02:12:05):
Hello, where is she? Where's my wife?

Speaker 16 (02:12:07):
Oh?

Speaker 1 (02:12:07):
She's a Claude Kimball.

Speaker 14 (02:12:08):
But he isn't an actor, he's real, a real man
is hot with my wife?

Speaker 26 (02:12:13):
Well?

Speaker 1 (02:12:13):
Really, Vince said, isn't any reliable substitutes? Sorrys, how do
you know about the act?

Speaker 14 (02:12:18):
We'll never learning about that. This kimble guy means business.

Speaker 1 (02:12:20):
Well, you're telling me we found out this morning.

Speaker 14 (02:12:22):
Paula can't go running around with another man?

Speaker 8 (02:12:25):
Why not?

Speaker 14 (02:12:25):
Because I that's the stupidest question I ever heard of.

Speaker 1 (02:12:29):
He certainly is handsome.

Speaker 14 (02:12:30):
This is the nerve of that Mississippi moose.

Speaker 1 (02:12:32):
And he's rich too.

Speaker 14 (02:12:33):
Will you stop praising him and act like a sister.

Speaker 1 (02:12:35):
Well, why don't you act like a husband.

Speaker 14 (02:12:37):
Or your information? I never felt more like a husband
in my life.

Speaker 1 (02:12:40):
Good and maybe you can forget your mister Frasier crazy Fraser.

Speaker 14 (02:12:44):
Good lord, I did forget. We've got a date for lunch.

Speaker 47 (02:12:46):
Well, you're my brother, brother, so take it from the lead.
You better stop playing around or you're going to lose
Paula and I'll.

Speaker 15 (02:12:52):
Find some way to get even with a tobacco Romeo.
Oh well, I'll, i'll, I'll stop smoking cigarettes, Margaret. The
contracts all drawn up.

Speaker 50 (02:13:13):
All you have to do is sign, then, Darling, I
don't want to sign, not yet anyway.

Speaker 14 (02:13:18):
But you're wrecking my marriage.

Speaker 1 (02:13:19):
Stop phoning and eat you lunch.

Speaker 14 (02:13:21):
I don't want to eat.

Speaker 1 (02:13:24):
Then tell me about my eyes.

Speaker 22 (02:13:25):
You used to adore my eyes, Margot.

Speaker 14 (02:13:28):
That was five years ago.

Speaker 15 (02:13:29):
I happen to be in love with my wife, and
I'm going to lose her to another man because she
thinks that.

Speaker 14 (02:13:33):
You're a Roman. I want to make some bet, Ben's
what is it over there? Paula and Kimball. I'm a
dead duck. Oh man, are coming over death? Where is
I sting? You?

Speaker 1 (02:13:47):
Heal?

Speaker 14 (02:13:47):
There it is now, darling. This is mister Fraser.

Speaker 1 (02:13:53):
Hearty, ma'am.

Speaker 8 (02:13:55):
You blue Beard, not Paula.

Speaker 14 (02:13:58):
Just because I didn't shave this morning, mister.

Speaker 1 (02:14:00):
Fraser, you've been carrying on with all.

Speaker 10 (02:14:03):
The well there now, Paula, don't you cry little sugar full.

Speaker 14 (02:14:10):
Mister Temple, would you please take your arm away from
little sugar poots waste?

Speaker 1 (02:14:15):
Don't I want to divorce? I want to divorce.

Speaker 14 (02:14:34):
A divorce, A divorce. Paula wants a divorce.

Speaker 25 (02:14:39):
People.

Speaker 14 (02:14:39):
I haven't done anything wrong. I'm completely interested.

Speaker 1 (02:14:42):
But she's out in the living room with Claude.

Speaker 14 (02:14:43):
Now.

Speaker 1 (02:14:43):
My advice to you is to make one last attempt.
Tell her the truth.

Speaker 14 (02:14:47):
You might have been telling her the truth almost, my boy.

Speaker 1 (02:14:51):
There are two kinds of truth, the real truth and
the woman's kind.

Speaker 47 (02:14:55):
Tell her the real truth and you're dead. Tell her
the truth she's certain of You've got nothing to What
about it?

Speaker 14 (02:15:01):
You really think she'd forgive me?

Speaker 16 (02:15:02):
Certainly?

Speaker 14 (02:15:03):
What about that mold he mint jewel? About there? That
Timple guy.

Speaker 8 (02:15:07):
Man?

Speaker 1 (02:15:09):
I kind of like him?

Speaker 14 (02:15:10):
Probably don't like a guy like that. Give him mentioned
he takes a mile. All I do is living permission
to make love to my wife. And look what's happened.

Speaker 1 (02:15:17):
You better get out there and make up some story
about Margot Frasier.

Speaker 14 (02:15:20):
All right, all right, here I go. Well, Thence, we
were just talking about you.

Speaker 1 (02:15:27):
I was just remarking what another jerque are dear?

Speaker 14 (02:15:30):
Well, well, maybe you're right, Paula. Paula, I've made a
big mistake. I think so too, Man claud I know
this is very bold of me, but would you mind
letting me have a few words alone with my wife? No,
not at all, Thank you.

Speaker 1 (02:15:44):
You stay right here, God, Paula.

Speaker 15 (02:15:46):
I want to tell you the truth about Margo and me.
I want to be clean again Margaot and I. Well,
I've been a fool. I admit it, and I know
you'll be big enough to forgive me. I feel as
the light just taking a bath.

Speaker 1 (02:16:01):
I feel as if i'd like to hit you with
a bathtub.

Speaker 14 (02:16:04):
I thought you'd be glad to hear the truth that base, Yes, ma'am, No, Pola,
I didn't mean it. There are two kinds of truth, Paula.

Speaker 1 (02:16:10):
We'll try this kind but.

Speaker 8 (02:16:14):
We'll try this one the other one. What happened? What happened?

Speaker 14 (02:16:26):
Big help you are? She went wild when.

Speaker 1 (02:16:28):
I told her, well, I never did know much about
women myself.

Speaker 14 (02:16:32):
Maybe you picked a fine time to let me know.

Speaker 1 (02:16:35):
I'll go in there and see what I can do.
Maybe I can convince her you are lying, and.

Speaker 14 (02:16:39):
See if you can get that Alabama menace out of there.

Speaker 1 (02:16:46):
Well, Vinci boy, I thought I drop in for a
men Well.

Speaker 14 (02:16:49):
Drop right out again. My marriage is in the process
of being retooled.

Speaker 1 (02:16:53):
Oh, but I've been very unfair. I want to sign
the contract.

Speaker 15 (02:16:57):
I don't care about the cop. You want to sign
the contract? Yes, just a minute, the contract? Oh, here
it is, Hey on, Michael, just sign here.

Speaker 14 (02:17:07):
Here's the pan. Here you are, Margot, I could hug you.

Speaker 1 (02:17:13):
Go ahead now I will, Hey, not so hard, since he.

Speaker 15 (02:17:20):
Just told me that, Paula, if somebody will hand me
a gun, I'll just blow my brains out.

Speaker 50 (02:17:28):
Missus Frazier, would you mind stepping out of my husband's
arms while I talked to him?

Speaker 1 (02:17:34):
Then why don't you let me go?

Speaker 14 (02:17:37):
I don't know. I think I'm paralyzed.

Speaker 1 (02:17:40):
For a minute. Instance, He've had me convinced but.

Speaker 14 (02:17:43):
To bring this woman into our own home to the.

Speaker 1 (02:17:46):
Fire openly life.

Speaker 11 (02:17:48):
Oh now wait a.

Speaker 1 (02:17:49):
Minute, told me what you two have been up to
behind my back?

Speaker 4 (02:17:52):
What do you mean up?

Speaker 1 (02:17:53):
Tell you exactly what.

Speaker 14 (02:17:59):
M Vincent.

Speaker 10 (02:18:01):
I want to worry with you about your wife.

Speaker 14 (02:18:02):
Are you still here? Listen to your son?

Speaker 15 (02:18:04):
Kiss Georgia peach. I'm going to toss you out of
here and your son? Then do you stay out of
this Eve? Where do you get off?

Speaker 14 (02:18:10):
I'm gonna go off carrying out with my wife anyway.

Speaker 1 (02:18:12):
Now, vin said you didn't mind.

Speaker 14 (02:18:15):
That was because I thought you were getting paid for it. Well,
I couldn't accept money for a thing like that.

Speaker 1 (02:18:21):
You get out of here, Vince. I've been trying to
tell you Claude isn't interested in Paula.

Speaker 14 (02:18:27):
He isn't. No, you see, Vince, I've been told that
Eve here is more on my type.

Speaker 1 (02:18:33):
Man who told you I did?

Speaker 14 (02:18:38):
Well, just get this vehemous jinman out of the house,
that's all I asked.

Speaker 1 (02:18:41):
Well, Vincent, don't how dare you talk about him like that?
So come on, Claude, Yes, little children, book, vin I
just got a little talk with your wife. Well, well
this is for bragging house goodbye, Paula. I just got

(02:19:01):
a little talk with my gold face. But Paula, this
is for lying bow and this is for being such.

Speaker 14 (02:19:06):
A wonderful Please not again again, Paula, you kiss me?

Speaker 1 (02:19:17):
Yes? Missus Joan, I'm missus Joan.

Speaker 14 (02:19:19):
I'm from the Ted Burke Agency.

Speaker 51 (02:19:21):
I had a hard time tracking you down, but here
I am ready to make love to you.

Speaker 14 (02:19:29):
If you want me to start right away.

Speaker 10 (02:19:32):
Pardon me, dear, And who are you, my good man?

Speaker 15 (02:19:36):
Just an amateur. Stick around and see what you can learn. Paula,
come here, watch this, my good man. Gee gosh, wow,

(02:20:14):
Well I've just heard the last act that don't trust
your husband. In a moment, our star Fred McMurray and
screen director Lloyd Bacon will return to the microphone. The
other day, a publicity writer said to me, Jimmy, what
are you trying to do wreck our business? All his
talk you give out about Hollywood being a modest, home
loving town.

Speaker 6 (02:20:34):
Well, I'm only telling the truth. Most of the movie
stars are just as normal as blueberry pie folks like
you and me, who enjoy such simple pleasures as sitting
out in the backyard playing jin rummy, cooking hot dog
over a fire and drinking cold bottles of Paps Blue
Ribbon beer. Everything in perfect taste, blue ribbon taste. And

(02:20:58):
it's that blue ribbon taste has made this internationally famous
beer so popular here in Hollywood and all over America.
As a radio announcer, I have a fairly wide acquaintance
among the movie people, and I've observed Paps Blue Ribbon
not only in the homes of the stars, but in
the homes of movie writers, cameramen, directors, radio engineers, and

(02:21:19):
well just about everybody I know. There seems to be
unanimous agreement that Paps Blue Ribbon is the finest beer
served anywhere. Your taste will tell you why. Next week,

(02:21:41):
Screen Director's Playhouse brings you a program and tribute to
the late screen director mister Sam Wood. Our story will
be taken from one of his finest pictures, Pride of
the Yankees, and our star will be Gary Cooper. Now
Here again is tonight's star Fred McMurray and Green director
Lloyd Baker.

Speaker 15 (02:22:11):
Lloyd, you've been in the movie business a long time.
Tell me how did you get into the picture business
in the first place.

Speaker 44 (02:22:17):
Well, Fred, years ago, I was on the stage and
once I had a partner in Oscar Wire's Place.

Speaker 14 (02:22:23):
To Lone Me good role. I'm Fred for four hundred
and fifty nights. I had my head chopped off. Then
I wanted the pictures. You felt you were ready? Eh, Brother?
With my experience, I could scream cut with the best
directors in the business. How about giving the audience a
demonstration like this, friend, cut that means the end of

(02:22:43):
the scene. Good night, Lloyd, good night Fred, good night everyone.

Speaker 8 (02:22:52):
I can fd ck Barry and screen director Lloyd Baker. Friends.

Speaker 6 (02:23:07):
When you buy your weekend supply of beer tomorrow morning,
ask your dealer to show you Paps Blue Ribbon's new
Handy six carton with a cleverly designed new easy to
carry handle. It contains six regular sized cans of Paps
Blue Ribbon finest beer served anywhere. Ask for the Handy

(02:23:28):
six tomorrow. Don't Trust your husband. Was presented through the

(02:23:49):
courtesy of James Nasser Productions, soon releasing Without Honors, starring
Lorraine Day and Dana Clara. Fred mclary will soon be
seen in Borderline, co starring with Claire Trevor. Lloyd Bacon
is the director of the soon to be released Columbia
Pictures production MS Grant Takes Richmond, starring Lucille Ball and
William Holden. Included in Tonight's cast were Virginia Craig as

(02:24:10):
Paula Mary Shipp, Betty lu Gerson, Jack Edwards, Janeavello, hal Gerard,
Betty Moran, Herb Bigren, and Don Stanley. Don't Trust Your
Husband was adapted for radio by Richard Allan Simmons, and
original music was.

Speaker 14 (02:24:25):
Composed and conducted by Henry Russell who.

Speaker 6 (02:24:28):
Screen Director's Playhouse is produced by Howard Wiley, with dramatic
direction by Bill carn Listen again next week when pap
Blue Ribbon presents.

Speaker 15 (02:24:36):
Screen Director's Playhouse production Pride of the Yankees director Sam
Wood star Gary Cooper.

Speaker 14 (02:24:51):
Screen Director's Playhouse is brought to you by the Paft.

Speaker 6 (02:24:53):
Brewing Company of Milwaukee, Wisconsin, New York, New Jersey, and Peoria, Illinois,
and sents your away with the best wishes of the
Blue Ribbon dealers from coast to coast. James Wallington speaking.

Speaker 7 (02:25:17):
Now, if you go to look for the movie under
the name Don't Trust Your Husband, You're not gonna find it.
It was released in the US entitled An Innocent Affair
and Fred McMurray, Madeline Carroll, Buddy Rogers, Rita Johnson, Louise Albretton,
Alan mowbray. It was released in nineteen forty eight. It

(02:25:42):
was not a tremendously well received motion picture. Fred McMurray
didn't really have a lot of concern about that. He
made out well o it. He bought the story from
the writers Lou Breslo and Joseph Hossman, sold it to
NASA Production for seventy five thousand dollars, got a big

(02:26:04):
profit on that, and then he was paid more than
one hundred and fifty thousand dollars for his role, and
he also got a percentage of the profits. So you know,
they all made apparently a good deal of mument and
the movie did not let's say, it just didn't do

(02:26:25):
as well as people thought. NASA abought another comedy script
written by Bresla and Hoffmann, supposed to be a sequel
to this, but didn't fly, primarily, I think because the
reception to the movie was not great. Okay, Screen Director's

(02:26:45):
Playhouse seventy six years ago, September twenty third, nineteen forty nine.
Here on Classic Radio Theater with Wyatt Cox, but Bregnight
Murray good as usual. Coming up next, we're going to
see about what's going on on with Professor Sloan and
Lumon Abner.

Speaker 14 (02:27:10):
Driving tonight.

Speaker 42 (02:27:11):
Then, remember this, Most highway deaths are caused by two
temptations to cut out of line and to go too fast.
Crossing the center line of the road is more dangerous
than you realize. Statistics proven. Excessive speed is just as
dangerous as officials say. You can predict your own impulses,
but you can never predict the other drivers. When driving tonight,

(02:27:31):
drive cautiously.

Speaker 14 (02:27:32):
Please.

Speaker 7 (02:27:33):
Now let's hear from Lomon Abner. This episode eighty three
years ago September twenty third, nineteen forty two. Lam had
made a date with the new teacher before he found
out that the new teacher.

Speaker 8 (02:27:47):
Was not a she but a he.

Speaker 2 (02:27:50):
The makers of Alka Seltzer bring you, lum and Abner.

(02:28:41):
You know, friends, every little economy counts these days, and
here's a thrifty practice you'll surely want to follow. Always
keep a package of friendly, dependable Alca Culticer tablets in
your home. Now that really is economy spelled with a
capital E, because Alcacelser offers fast relief for not just one,
but many different common ailments. For headaches, for a touch

(02:29:02):
of acid, indigestion, muscular aches and pains, morning after misery,
and for that dull, achy feeling of the cold sound
almost too good to be true. Well, if it does,
that's almost a sure sign that you're not an alkalcelser user.
But you'll want to be because it can be quite
a help in making the family budget balance. And when
you ask you drugs for Alka seltzer, be sure to
get the large sized package because it's by far more economical.

(02:29:26):
And just make sure you'll get the genuine Alka selzer.

Speaker 17 (02:29:32):
You know.

Speaker 2 (02:29:34):
Let's see what's going on down in Pine Ridge. Well,
Lum's elaborate preparations to welcome the new school teacher, the
gifts of perfume and flowers, the secluded dinner by candle light,
and the other pleasant surprises he planned all turned out
to be a source of embarrassment when he discovered that
Marion Sloan was not the auburn haired woman of his

(02:29:56):
dreams as he had anticipated, but was instead a talkative man.
But the name of Professor Marion Orville Sloan, As we
looking on the little community. Today we find Abner in
the Choham down store and library. Long is just Henry.

Speaker 16 (02:30:13):
Listening all morning long.

Speaker 2 (02:30:20):
Morning avenue for about you being all morning or just
trying to get a little sleep, a little sleep?

Speaker 8 (02:30:26):
Yeah, let me sit down.

Speaker 2 (02:30:27):
Here, Hum there anything war to a frazzle?

Speaker 22 (02:30:31):
He war to a fras?

Speaker 16 (02:30:33):
Uh? Well, whatt you so wore out for? Uh?

Speaker 2 (02:30:37):
If you discussed the education for five hours like me
and that Professor Sloan done last night, you'd be war
out too. Five hours, Yes, sir, five hours. I had
to take him to Luke Spear's restling for supper last
night cause I had already made all arrangement.

Speaker 16 (02:30:52):
Yeah, I know he did.

Speaker 2 (02:30:53):
And do you know that we sit there and talk
till after ten o'clock or that is he done the talking.

Speaker 16 (02:30:59):
Ten i a clock while Luke don't stay open that
late long.

Speaker 2 (02:31:03):
He did last night Luke went to sleep behind the
counter and we had to wake him up when we left. Well,
I do know, fact says, I had a awful hard
time keep him from going to sleep myself.

Speaker 28 (02:31:13):
He did.

Speaker 2 (02:31:13):
Huh yeah, And that weren't all. Professor Sloan insisted on
walking home with me and He stood out in front
of my place and talked for two more hours, two
more hours. It was after twelve o'clock time I got
in bed last night.

Speaker 16 (02:31:26):
Well I do know, well, you must have enjoyed yourself
all for lott In enjoyed myself.

Speaker 2 (02:31:32):
Yeah, that was, without a doubt, the worst one evening
I've ever spent in my whole life. I do believe why.

Speaker 16 (02:31:38):
I thought you lot to discuss education. That's what you
said yesterday, said you loved that morning, every one thing.

Speaker 2 (02:31:45):
Well, oh that was different though. That was when I
thought marrying Sloan was a woman teacher. It's a lot
easier discussing education with a pretty woman.

Speaker 16 (02:31:54):
Well, did Professor Sloan enjoy eating by candlelight? Like that
soft romantic's mandolin music?

Speaker 2 (02:32:03):
We never had no mandlin music.

Speaker 16 (02:32:05):
Well, you told Luke to get somebody to play during
supperate in't you?

Speaker 2 (02:32:09):
Yeah? But I canceled that.

Speaker 16 (02:32:11):
Oh my, that's too bad. I know Professor Sloan would
enjoy that something wonderful? Did he wear that flower you
brought Frohm in his hair?

Speaker 2 (02:32:20):
All right, I've had just about enough of them smart
remarks a year. You didn't know yourself, he was a
man teacher or we seen him yesterday. You wish fool
just as much as I was.

Speaker 16 (02:32:32):
How do you like that ball of perfume you got burnt?

Speaker 2 (02:32:35):
All right, that's just enough of that.

Speaker 8 (02:32:37):
Now.

Speaker 16 (02:32:37):
What was the name of that perfume?

Speaker 8 (02:32:39):
Uh?

Speaker 16 (02:32:40):
Uh, love's temptation? Yeah, that was it.

Speaker 2 (02:32:42):
After a hairsh up and answered the phone, that was
all ring. I believe that beats anything.

Speaker 38 (02:32:48):
I'll get it done.

Speaker 16 (02:32:49):
Get it hello, John? Im down store library, done a
talking a store doing that?

Speaker 8 (02:32:56):
Oh, how to you do, sir?

Speaker 16 (02:32:58):
I no, this is her peabody.

Speaker 30 (02:33:02):
You want what?

Speaker 4 (02:33:04):
Oh?

Speaker 14 (02:33:06):
Uh huh.

Speaker 8 (02:33:09):
Uh huh oh.

Speaker 16 (02:33:10):
I know he'd love that, cause that's the one thing
he enjoyge doing just a minute.

Speaker 2 (02:33:16):
Who is he, Professor Salon? Oh, I'm he wants you
to have supper with him tonight with him.

Speaker 16 (02:33:22):
Yeah, he says he wants to continue your discussion of education. Oh,
my goodness, says he'd like to go into the early
Egyptian school system. I believe, he said, who.

Speaker 2 (02:33:33):
Cares about the Egyptian school system?

Speaker 16 (02:33:35):
Well, what you want me to tell him?

Speaker 2 (02:33:37):
Tell him? I got triple pneumonion. Tell him anything?

Speaker 16 (02:33:40):
Well here you tell him?

Speaker 2 (02:33:41):
Or said, oh, no, I don't wanna talk to him.
Tell him I got to work late at the store tonight, right,
he can't make it for supper. Tell him that, all right?

Speaker 22 (02:33:49):
Hello, Professor Sloan hate to tell his story.

Speaker 16 (02:33:53):
Well, lum says he's got to work late tonight, so
he can't make it for supper, Yes, sir, uh huh.

Speaker 2 (02:34:01):
Tell him I'm sorry.

Speaker 22 (02:34:02):
Though, uh.

Speaker 16 (02:34:02):
He says he's sorry. Oh, he loved to the worst way,
but he just can't make it, all right, professor, And goodbye?

Speaker 2 (02:34:15):
Huh oh, goodbye. Yeah, thank goodness.

Speaker 8 (02:34:19):
I got out of that.

Speaker 16 (02:34:20):
Of course, I don't see what you want to get
out of it for long, the way you love to
discuss education and all.

Speaker 2 (02:34:26):
All right, now, don't start that again.

Speaker 16 (02:34:28):
I wish you would have had to win.

Speaker 2 (02:34:30):
Well, I admitted I did say that's what I wanted
to do, but I've changed my mind since then. Granted,
is that, Professor Sloanan all through how the old Greeks
used to learn their young. Well you've all of these
is some fella named Socrates and another name there Studel
or something. Since your name is that?

Speaker 16 (02:34:49):
Oh, I'm sorry I missed all that sounds interesting, awful interesting.

Speaker 2 (02:34:53):
Wish you'd have been there then, Oh my wish you'd
have had to suffer like I did, and then maybe
you'd stop making fun of me.

Speaker 16 (02:34:59):
Well, I would have come on, but I never had
no far to wearing my hair.

Speaker 2 (02:35:04):
I told you wants to cut out them smart remarks.
That's that good, all them remarks that you're smart. Ain't
nothing smart about him? If you say one more word
about flowers in their hair or romantics mandolin music, I'm
gonna walk you right on top of the head with something.

Speaker 16 (02:35:21):
I was just repeating what I heard you say yesterday.

Speaker 26 (02:35:25):
Long.

Speaker 2 (02:35:25):
Well, everything's changed since yesterday. Fact says, I'm sort of
thinking about resigning as president of the school board after
all you are, Yes, sir. I don't believe I could
go through a whole year listening to Professor Sloan give
his ide his own education. Oh uses the biggest words
I ever heard in my life. I doubt whether he

(02:35:46):
knows what they mean. Wow, there's a monotonous one talker.
There is a whole world. How about you? He talked
for a half hour with without even stopping there, hardly
taking time to breathe. Even what do you say?

Speaker 14 (02:36:00):
Man?

Speaker 2 (02:36:00):
You got me there? I ain't got the least idea's
what he was talking about. Wow, all I done? Just
keep saying, yes, Professor schlam No, Professor, uh huh, professor,
that's right, Professor Granny.

Speaker 16 (02:36:15):
All that sounds awfully interesting. Just sarm it's just lost
up in here.

Speaker 2 (02:36:19):
You ain't half his Sorry as I get the phone,
there isn't so I ring against it might be Professor
Salon Abnor. Cut that out, please, Hello.

Speaker 16 (02:36:29):
Old John him down store Avenue, Peabody doing the talking.
Huh oh yes, professor slow.

Speaker 2 (02:36:38):
Oh my goodness, it's him again.

Speaker 27 (02:36:40):
Uh huh.

Speaker 16 (02:36:43):
Oh yes, sir, Well that sounds wonderful. All Long will
just be tickled to death to hear that, to hear
what he says. He's arranged to have sister Simpson fixed
supper for him and you late in the evening, Long,
so you can go over there after you get work here.

Speaker 2 (02:37:01):
Oh my goodness. Uh, tell him I got to work later,
and I figured I did.

Speaker 14 (02:37:05):
Uh.

Speaker 16 (02:37:06):
Hello, Lom says he has to work later, and he figured, Professor,
Oh yes, sir, At just a minute, I'll tell him.

Speaker 2 (02:37:17):
What do you say now?

Speaker 16 (02:37:18):
He said it didn't matter how lady was Long said
he's got insaw news or something like it and can't sleep.

Speaker 2 (02:37:24):
No way, Well, tell him I can't make it till
order after ten o'clock.

Speaker 16 (02:37:29):
Tell him, uh, professor Lom says, he can't make it
till after ten o'clock.

Speaker 2 (02:37:34):
And need you tell one story? You gotta tell a
thousand of him looks like uh huh.

Speaker 16 (02:37:40):
Well, now just a minute, he says, that's fine, them says,
make it later.

Speaker 2 (02:37:44):
If you want to blame it all anyway, I believe
your stuff.

Speaker 16 (02:37:48):
Law. Yeah, it looks like Hello, Lom says, he'll be there.

Speaker 2 (02:37:52):
Professor, Wait a minute, Dave, Now wait a minute.

Speaker 16 (02:37:54):
All right, sir, goodbye?

Speaker 2 (02:37:57):
He Now, who'd you say that for?

Speaker 16 (02:38:00):
There weren't nothing else to say.

Speaker 22 (02:38:02):
Now then, as.

Speaker 2 (02:38:02):
Hungry as I am, I gotta wait till ten o'clock
before I can eat my suffer.

Speaker 16 (02:38:08):
Well, sure, if we close up, you're gonna have to
stand around summer. So ten o'clock. But after all of them,
you're president in the school board, do you order discuss education?
What's the new teacher?

Speaker 2 (02:38:20):
I wish you'd keep still about that. You're getting on
mine or I know.

Speaker 16 (02:38:24):
If I was lected present, I jump with a chance,
like yes, yes.

Speaker 2 (02:38:28):
Sir, Right, Grannie, you're gonna get the chance. Then, huh,
you're going along with me tonight. Now wait a minute, now,
no you now you're going with me, and that's all all.
You not go around making smart reasons right now.

Speaker 16 (02:38:42):
Wait a minute, now, Long, I can't go with you tonight.
I'd love to, but I just.

Speaker 2 (02:38:46):
Why can't you?

Speaker 47 (02:38:47):
Why?

Speaker 16 (02:38:48):
Well?

Speaker 2 (02:38:48):
Uh, I just of course, cause why call?

Speaker 16 (02:38:53):
Well, I I've got to get home tonight, that's why.

Speaker 2 (02:38:55):
Why do you have to get home?

Speaker 27 (02:38:56):
Why?

Speaker 16 (02:38:57):
Well, I forget the reason right now, but I know
I have to go home, Elizabeth said, I had to.

Speaker 2 (02:39:02):
I think, Avenue, you were telling us story, and you
know I'm gonna call up Elizabeth and tell her you
want to be home for Shephard.

Speaker 16 (02:39:07):
Now wait a minute, no, Alam, don't do that here,
let me go that. Wait a minute along, listen, Elizabeth
don't even know why I have to go home, and
I I ain't even told her yet. I'm gonna surprise her.

Speaker 2 (02:39:18):
Long But she said she was the one that told
you all this, e Elizabeth. Unless is long, I ain't
gonna wait for us, Yes, ma'am, oh, just terribly say Elizabeth,
Admiral won't be home for supper tonight.

Speaker 30 (02:39:30):
Well done, it.

Speaker 2 (02:39:31):
Maum oh yeah, huh oh uhh yeah, I see, well
all right, I'll tell him Elizabeth No nothing important, uh huh,
all right, good bye.

Speaker 16 (02:39:47):
What she say?

Speaker 2 (02:39:47):
Long, she said you had to come home because you're
having somebody over for supper tonight.

Speaker 16 (02:39:52):
Well, yeah, I know it's good for I know there
was some reason why I had to go home tonight.

Speaker 2 (02:39:58):
Oh stop that last. You sound like a half witted thing.

Speaker 16 (02:40:02):
I'm sorryful, I can't go along with you tonight. Long
just love to sit up there and say yes, Professor Salon.
Ah huh, Professor Slan, admir.

Speaker 2 (02:40:11):
If you say one more word than me about anything,
I'm gonna whop your right on top of the head
or something I.

Speaker 16 (02:40:17):
Can't eat till ten o'clock. That's a good run on you.

Speaker 2 (02:40:22):
And there's that that blame phone again. Oh I'll answered this.

Speaker 16 (02:40:26):
Yeah, get it, get it?

Speaker 2 (02:40:27):
Professor? Maybe hello johnam down store, President l Edwards talking.
Oh yes, Professor Slan.

Speaker 8 (02:40:36):
Again you won't.

Speaker 2 (02:40:39):
Oh well that's nice.

Speaker 8 (02:40:42):
Yeah.

Speaker 2 (02:40:43):
Well, I'm awful disappointed, but we can do it at
some other time. Maybe we seed to get me out
of it. Yeah, well, much obliged for letting me know.
All right, Professor slan goodbye.

Speaker 16 (02:40:57):
Once, no matter, Ain't he gonna have supper with you after?

Speaker 48 (02:41:00):
No?

Speaker 2 (02:41:00):
No, no, he's kane. He said, he's invited over to
somebody else's house tonight. He said, why who invites me? Why?

Speaker 27 (02:41:08):
Uh?

Speaker 2 (02:41:08):
A woman with the name of missus Abner Peabody.

Speaker 8 (02:41:12):
Huh.

Speaker 2 (02:41:16):
Well, responsibility of the pine Ridge School system seems to
weigh heavily on President lum shoulders, doesn't it? And friends,
If you have your share of responsibilities, and among them
is caring for the family's cold, here's the way you
can simplify your problem. Get acquainted with the modern easy
alka seltzer. Whare to relief in cold stress. Now by
that we mean when you catch cold, start at once

(02:41:38):
to take care of yourself, get plenty of rest, eat sensibly,
dress wisely, avoid drafts, and take alka seltzer for real relief.
For that dull acoll over feeling of a cold. You
want to use alka seltzer as a soothing gargle too.
If a sore rasp betroats a part of your cold
is comfort, be sure to try alca celtier the very
next time you or some member of your family catch cold.

(02:42:00):
And see how fast it acts to bring comforting relief.
If you happened the package of modern effiveescent alpha Celsia
tablets in your home at the time, get one quickly
from your nearest ruggist. He has both the thirty and
the sixty cent sized package.

Speaker 8 (02:42:34):
Well, there you go.

Speaker 7 (02:42:35):
Abner's going to learn the hard way. Lomon Abner eighty
three years ago, September twenty third, nineteen forty two, Here
on Classic Radio Theater with Wyatt Talk. Thanks for making
us a part of your day. Join us for our
Wednesday podcast with episodes of Let George Do It, The Whistler,
The Shadow Romance, and more from Lomon. Afterself a great day,

(02:43:00):
We'll see you tomorrow for more Classic Radio Theater. I'm
Wyat Cox, M

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Classic Radio 09-23-25 - Leila returns, Edgar to New York, and Milton to Canada

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.css-14f5ked{margin:0;word-break:break-word;display:-webkit-box;-webkit-box-orient:vertical;box-orient:vertical;-webkit-line-clamp:2;overflow:hidden;}Classic Radio 09-23-25 - Leila returns, Edgar to New York, and Milton to Canada